Change of Heart
by ebtwisty9
Summary: All Bowser wanted was a good Birthday. All Peach thought she wanted was some time away from life. What she got may have changed her mind...about everything she's ever known. BowserxPeach with LuigixDaisy, KammyxKamek, koopalings, and others.
1. Good Morning

**Forward:** This is my (Razzi) first fanfic, and first ever Mario fanfic, so just a warning in case it's terrible. This specific chapter's pretty long and focuses only on Bowser, but trust me, there WILL be fluffiness (and an actual plot) in a few chapters. I do write a chapter or two ahead of what I publish, so hopefully that'll stop any change of plans or whatever. But if you have suggestions, please tell me! But if your suggestion is not to have a BowserxPeach fic, then I can't do that for you. ;) I know the pairing's a bit unorthodox, but I think it's sweet, and I've been a shipper of it since before I knew the word.

Disclaimer: Only thing I own in this chapter is Cookoopa, Jakob, Kardon, and some of the Darkland provinces.

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**Chapter One: Good Morning**

Koopaworld's giant Volcanopalace began its morning ritual of grinding up the inside of the volcano's rocks. Cooling lava began sizzling hot, gears clanged, rocks smashed, and all other kinds of commotion began the day. It was 8:30 on the spot, and Bowser was awake.

The mighty king opened his eyes and grinned. Oh the melodious music of his Volcanopalace! The sign that a new day had truly started, that the world was continuing, and that his kingdom was still one of the most powerful in the entire world. Bowser flung off his steel wool blanket and climbed off his bed. The superkoopa stretched his limbs and let out a mighty roar-like yawn while the Volcanopalace let out its first blast of energy of the day. The eruption rumbled his room and automatically turned on his shower. Bowser grinned as he heard the hot water tumbling into his bathroom shower and he headed towards it. The constant flow of motion and power, completely undisturbed for generations, continued to astound him. What kingdom other than his own had the wealth and power to be able to constantly make "disposable" castles and headquarters to fulfill entertainment purposes? None. Not even the Mushroom Kingdom, or so Bowser had been told.

He removed his pajamas and stepped into the shower, letting the steamy water stream over his body and through his fire red mane. The eruption ended and so did the flowing water. Bowser stepped out and concentrated his energy as if to blow fire. He held in the flame, and successfully let all the water steam off his body. Bowser grappled through the white mist of steam and clutched his newly polished green shell, adorned with spikes. The king slipped it on and stared in front of his mirror. The mirror frame was shaped of tiny Bowser replicas as well as other KoopaKings of the past. Bowser pulled his claws through his mane and grabbed an igneous toothbrush with rock-firm bristles. Bowser wet it and scrubbed his horns until they shined then did the same for his menacing teeth. He snapped the head, now with frayed bristles, off and into a trashcan. Bowser tossed the rest of the brush into a separate bin for the maids to re-attach a new head.

As he left his room, draped in red and black satin with statues of himself dotting the benches, lighting, and his own bed, he secured his spiked arm bracelets and choker. The rumbling of the Volcanopalace's energy source vibrated his feet and gave the mighty king a tempo to his walking as he ambled down the long, stone hallway. As he drew closer to the big black door with his engraved image on it, (biting a cheep-cheep on a stick,) he could hear voices. Two bickering, high-pitched ones, a loud, boastful one, a quiet, humming one, and the scratching of a quill along with random notes bellowed out. Bowser pushed the door open and announced his presence.

"Daddy!" Bowser jr. rushed up to his father and grasped onto his leg.

"Hello, Junior," Bowser gruffly said and stepped over to the large, wooden (and quite burnt) table where five of Bowser's eight kooplings were sitting. "'Morning." They all returned his greeting graciously. Bowser pulled out a steel chair and shook his leg before sitting. In response, Bowser Jr. scrambled off and into his own chair, watching his father excitedly. "Where's Larry?" Bowser asked his kids, noticing his second youngest koopling's absence.

"Drawing designs," Ludwig, Bowser's oldest son with crazy blue hair, replied over his stacks of parchment. He picked up his parakoopa quill, dripping blue ink, and looked to his father. "How does this sound, Pa? Do fa do mi di di, ti mi ti do…"

"It's great, Ludwig." Bowser said with a wave of his claw. Although Ludwig knew his father wasn't paying attention, he grinned in pleasure and scratched down more notes. "And Wendy…?"

"Bedroom vanity." Lemmy, Bowser's second oldest son with a lazy eye and rainbow hair, replied. "As usual."

"What's foh breakfast, Pops?" Roy, Bowser's third oldest and bald son with outlandish sunglasses asked.

"How'm I supposed to know, Roy? Ask Cookoopa."

"'Ey! Cookie! What's foh breakfast?"

Cookoopa, the Royal Koopa Family's professional koopa chef was a fat, but cheerful koopa. "Fried eggs with Goombread, hunny."

"North or South?" Iggy Koopa, Bowser's middle child with heavy glasses inquired.

"Goombread? North." Cookoopa replied cheerfully.

"You know," Ludwig mumbled over his composing, "South is a lot healthier. It has more fiber."

"Your face has more fiber, fiber-face!" Morton Jr. shouted in reply. Ludwig simply rolled his eyes.

"Cookoopa, put my eggs in the Goombread, I have to get going. Roy, tell Wendy and Larry to get out eating their breakfast or I'm feeding it to Chomp." Bowser commanded. He stood up and grabbed his breakfast from Cookoopa.

"Sure thang, Pops." Roy slid out of his chair and walked over to one of the four spiral staircases, each leading to two of the koopling's bedrooms. He howled up one of them, "Larry! Gecho tail down here before Pops throws your eggs to Chomp." With a squeal, the door banged open and closed and Larry soared down his stairs. Roy shouted the same warning up Wendy and Bowser Jr.'s staircase.

"Then let Chomp eat them! I'm busy!" Wendy yelled down to the Dining Room, adding, "I hate eggs anyway!"

Cookoopa gave a little laugh. "You tell her if she doesn't eat her protein, she'll get wrinkles like ol' Cookoopa."

"'Ey Wendy! Cookie says if yous dun eat your eggs you'll get wrinkles on yoh face!" Roy yelled up to his sister. Wendy ran down her stairs in reply, high-heels clicking like horse hoofs as she hurried. In the drama-queen fashion she was infamous from, Wendy popped her claws onto her hips.

"You serious? 'Cause my hair isn't done yet."

"You don't have any hair, baldy!" Morton bellowed.

While Wendy gripped her bow defensively, Ludwig retorted with "And you do?" Morton's chair leapt back with a screech as he stood, cracking his knuckles and approaching Ludwig. In reply, Ludwig lovingly placed his quill back into the ink well and placed his hands behind his shell defensively.

"Hey, hey, hey, no fighting until I get back from the meeting." Bowser warned with a shaking claw. "Cookoopa, give me eggs, I gotta get going." Bowser stuffed the eggs in Goombread into his mouth as Cookoopa passed out the other eggs to the kooplings. His boiling 'salvia glands' (that would ignite into flame when met with air) quickly disintegrated the breakfast and Bowser swallowed the remains without a single chew. "Make it bigger next time. See you when I see you," the king dismissed himself with a waving claw. As he pulled the heavy door open and stormed into the next long, dark hallway he could hear his children squealing farewells.

Bowser's feet clicked regally on the stone floor as the Dining Room's doors swung shut. Scurrying workers of all kind raced through the many corridors, bowing and saluting as each passed the king. Bowser nodded proudly to each greeting until one especially enthusiastic hammerling appeared at his side.

"Your Majesty?" Bowser grunted in reply as he kept walking. The short hammerling raced to keep up with the superkoopa's strides. "I'm Jakob. I'm on an internship here; it's an honor to meet you!" Bowser grunted yet again. "Perhaps you've heard of my father, Bokaj?"

Bowser stopped in his steps and turned to the hammerling, nervously straightening his showy helmet. "Yeah, I've heard of Bokaj, used to be Thundering Turtle's Tosser. How's he doin'?" Bowser continued his pace down the hall, turning down every few corridors to get to his destination.

"Good, a bit slower than normal what with his foot injury. Dropped a hammer, y'see."

"Shame. He was a good defensive player on the team. You going to replace him as the new Tosser?"

The hammerling laughed, "I wish! I'm no where ready for that right now."

"That's right. Loose some of that flab and thicken your shoulders before you even look at Equipment manager, kid." With that, Bowser reached his door.

"Thank you, sir!" Jakob squealed. Thrilled with his conversation, he scampered down the opposite direction.

Bowser pressed his claw against a char black door with a large golden star on it. Upon opening the door, he entered a large room with a high ceiling and a huge round table in the center of the room. Bowser nodded formally to all those sitting at the table and climbed a small flight of stairs. These stairs led to a large puff in the center of the table itself where the mighty Koopa King sat. He looked down at those around him and his assistant, Kammy Koopa, rushed up to sit near his puff. "Everyone present?" Bowser mumbled. Kammy nodded happily. "Then let's get this over with."

Kammy signaled to a very tall magikoopa, who launched four green flashes into the room to gain attention, as if Bowser's presence hadn't already done that. "Let the Meeting commence."

Bowser drummed his sharp claws against his knee as the representatives from the North Bay and the representatives from Tchital bickered over who owned the gulf between them. Two of the more tourist-y parts of the Darklands, the gulf was a big moneymaker. Bowser rolled his eyes and spoke up. "Tchital can own the half closest to them. North Bay gets the half closest to them. No one goes in the middle, that'll be owned by me."

"Excellent idea, your lordship!"

Bowser ignored the compliment and turned to Kammy. "Is it over now? That was the last item on the itinerary for today."

"I don't know, majesty. Let me check-" Kammy spoke in whispers with the tall magikoopa who had called the meeting's beginning. "My lord, Kardon says that there is one other matter to be discussed."

Bowser rubbed his temples impatiently. "What is it?"

Kardon looked his king in the eye. "The council of Magikoopas is wondering what your current plans for the Mushroom Kingdom are."

Bowser glared at Kardon. "You've got some nerve. Those plans are between Kamek, Kammy, and myself."

"Yes sir, but you've been lagging in activity since the incident in Rougeport, and we were wondering if we could help."

"No. I'm letting the kingdom simmer. As soon as we have control over Ekrobak-"

"Sir, Ekrobak's been resisting us for 5 years and-"

Bowser plowed on past the interruption. "-we will produce plans for the Kingdom. Ekrobak is still in a weak alliance with King Toadstool, we can't risk the Mushroomies trying to help those at Ekrobak."

Kardon looked defeated by his reasoning. "Yes sir. That was all."

"Then end this."

Kardon stood and cleared his throat. He launched four more green flashes and cried in a booming voice, "We now adjourn this Meeting for one week. We will meet again on the Eighth of Rekorb." With that announcement, the meeting's attendants quickly began to disperse, some headed towards exits, others gathering together to chat. Bowser glanced up at the giant clock with his face engraved behind it. _1:28, was the meeting seriously that long?_ Bowser stretched out his arms and headed for the door, letting his thoughts wander to things more pleasant than his monarchial duties. His children, his power, and…Peach.

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**Author's Note:** Much more to come! Hopefully all that wasn't too tiring to read. It was fun to write! Please R&R and you'll get more. Whatever you write (or don't), I will keep writing, But I may not publish. ;) 


	2. The Race

**Forward:** This chapter is all Peach and her friends, shorter than the last chapter. Added a few things here and there recently, including the entire ending, so I hope its not horrid.

Anyway, thanks for reading last chapter. I really appreciated all the great reviews, thanks for helping me out.

Disclaimer: I don't own anythingin this chapter except the chapter itself. :)

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Princess Daisy's tennis shoes smacked the false grass as she raced to greet a tennis ball. _SMACK!_ Her racket made contact. "A-hall right!" Daisy jubilantly shouted. She boastingly leaned over the net towards her wheezing opponent. "Whatchu think of that, Luigi? Daisy, Fourty-five. Luigi, zip!" 

"I think….that we-a…should take…a break." Luigi grasped his stomach and looked longingly at the princess.

Peach smiled from her lawn chair, sheltered by a large pink umbrella. "Daisy, I think you're going a bit too hard for the kid."

Daisy shook her racket at Peach and Mario in the shade. "Just be glad I'm not playing you two lazy bums."

Peach placed her delicate hands on her hips. "Excuuuuuse me? Lazy bums?"

"You heard me! Sittin' under there, drinking your slushies, it bores me just looking at you two!"

"Fine then, Mario and I challenge you and Luigi to a race around the castle."

Mario stared at Peach. "We do?"

"I know a short-cut," Peach mumbled out of the corner of her mouth.

"Make it the entire castle grounds!" Daisy challenged.

"Even better."

"Losers buy lunch for the winners- resturant of winner's choice. And by winner I mean us."

"_AND_ losers, and by losers I mean you two, have to sing the order.."

"You're on."

"Daisy…." Luigi groaned. In response, Daisy grabbed his wrist and tugged him towards the castle's garage.

"Come on, Mario."

"Coming, Peach." The two groups hurried to choose the Two-Rider gokarts, Peach and Mario settling with a fire red one, Daisy and Luigi with a round orange car. Daisy and Mario placed themselves as drivers, Luigi and Peach taking the peddler spot. The two cars lined up and Daisy counted down.

"1….2…3!" The two cars revved and zoomed out on the road. Peach slowed hers down while Luigi and Daisy sped ahead, unsuspicious.

"Turn left, Mario!"

"Peach, those-a bushes."

"And I planted them; I should know what's going on. Turn left!"

Mario obliged and the team pushed their way through the foliage, suddenly taking a drop lower…and lower.

"Where are we-a going?"

"Just keep moving straight. We're under the moat. When you come to a red mushroom, turn into the right tunnel. It'll take us into the Slide room."

"Okey-doke." Mario followed her instructions and the two were soon in a huge room with a twisting ceiling- the giant slide!

"Go straight, and then we're going to start climbing a hill."

"Want me to pedal?"

"I'm fine, Mar." The team continued in silence until sunlight began flooding their car again. Mario glanced at Peach as the she propelled the car forward, steering hardly an issue when going straight. Peach wiped a sweat drop from her face and they landed back on the road. Peach ignored Mario's glances, as well as her growing fatigue, and sighed in relief as Mario rounded the shortcut's last turn.

"The finish line! _Brillante_, Peach. Luigi and Daisy aren't even half done yet!"

"I know." Peach slowed her pedaling to a cruise and turned to Mario.

As the car slid over the finish line, Mario turned and smiled at Peach. "What-a now?"

"Now we wait." Silence fell over the car until Peach spoke up again. "Do you have any plans?"

"Plans for what? The trip? Or…what?"

Peach looked at her feet uncomfortably. "Us."

"Oh." Mario could feel his face flushing red as he looked back at the princess. "I was thinking…we would play it by-a ear. See where life takes us the next-a few years. If Bowser doesn't disturb the Kingdom again, then…"

Peach looked at Mario hopefully. "Then…?"

Mario shrugged. "Maybe, if your-a father approves, we could…get…married?"

The conversation, though extremely awkward, was one Peach had silently been hoping for. "You know, you're no prince."

"But I am a human. One of the few in the city. That's gotta give me some status with-a your pa."

"That's true. And we're still planning that trip to Grand Canal for this week, right?"

Mario looked over at Peach and flinched. He had completely forgotten about their plans to meet his parents.

Peach read him like a book. "You forgot?" As Mario nodded, Peach sighed. "You have new plans, don't you?"

"Plumbing convention."

"Are you free week after then?"

"Um, I think so. I'll pick you up same time, same place. Just-a different day."

"Great. I've been looking forward to this." Peach looked up at the sky and smiled. It was true, Mario wasn't exactly handsome, nor rich, and not even very charming. He certainly wasn't the prince Peach had dreamed of all her younger years, but she knew him like a brother. He was her best friend. She loved him, he loved her. Although he had never said it out loud, he didn't really need to. Peach looked at Mario, his eyes turned toward Peach's mighty castle. It _would_ be nice to just hear him say it someday…

Suddenly the rev of an engine awoke Peach from her daydream. _Of course! Daisy and Luigi._ She turned boastingly towards her cousin and her partner as the approached.

"Ah, Man! You beat us!" Daisy yelled as her car slowed to a stop.

"By a mile."

"We didn't even see you pass!"

"Maybe you ought to look harder then, Daisy," Peach told her with a smirk. She turned to Mario with a bit of a grin. "What would you say sounds better…Lumati's House or Hot 'N' Ready?"

Mario simmered in his own delight of the win-win option. Gormuet, all-you-can-eat pasta or the spiciest of meats and sauces? He snapped his eyes open from his daze. "Lumati's. And I want Luigi to be the one to order."

Luigi rubbed his temples in disgust. "Muma Mia, can this day get any worse?"

Daisy laughed and dragged the plumber. "Com'on, you. We've gotta get there first!"

When the group arrived at Lumati's and was seatedby a handsome young toad, adorned in a black cap and suit, several velvet menus were placed in front of them. The waiter told them his name, the specials, and a few other things Peach wasn't paying attention to. Her eyes were searching the expressions of her companions. Daisy was trying hard to appear as if paying attention to the waiter toad, Luigi was glancing from his menu, to the waiter, to Daisy, to his menu again, and Mario seemed enthralled by his menu alone. His mouth seemed to drool at the pages of food and his eyes were held with such rapture to the color photographs he didn't even hear the toad ask for drinks.

"Sir? Sir? Sir?" The toad was obviously impatient, so Peach lifted her dress just a tad and gave Mario a firm, hard kick on the shin from under the table.

Mario stared up at Peach. Years of being battered around by Bowser's minions and less-than pious princesses had given him nerves of steel. Peach mouthed "drink" to him very impatiently and nudged her head towards the waiter, now tapping his pencil on his notebook.

"Um, Water."

The waiter closed his eyes in displeasure at the thought that he had waited so long and so patiently for _um, water_. He decided then and there that the posh ladies and their plumbers better hand him a hefty tip. He gave a tiny bow, his thanks, and left the table.

Luigi and Daisy restarted their rapt conversation, Peach listening in and adding her own bits, as she usually did. Out of the corner of her eye she noticed Mario, doubtlessly in the dessert section by the infatuation in his eyes. Daisy and Luigi's chatter turned to buzz as her mind set back on the possibility that Mario didn't love Peach- at least not in the way she desperately wanted. And needed. He expressed more love towards a menu, for goodness sake, than he had ever toward Peach.

_No. I'm being silly._ Peach closed her eyes, tucked her blonde hair behind her large blue earrings and took a calming breath. _He's just being the adorable little man I love him for. I know he loves me as much as I love him.It's one of his little…imperfections that makes him so perfect._

Peach nodded to herself and rejoined Daisy and Luigi's conversation. But the nagging thought remained in the back of her head, this time, unlike so many other times before it, refusing to leave.

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**Author's Note:** Right, this chapter wasn't all that grand. Sorry about that, ut I can promise- Chapter 3 is much better! I honestly love it...probably the most of all I've written thus far. But you know the deal...no reviews, no posting. Blah blah blah.

Razzi


	3. Big Decisions

**Forward: **This section is the first with both perspectives, a little from VolcanoPalace and a little from Peach's Castle. In all honesty, this and most of next chapter used to be one, simply titled "Plans", but it was way too long, so I broke it up. Hopefully that doesn't take anything out of it besides length.

Thanks again for the reviews you gave last chapter and I'm looking forward to a bit more for this one.

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**Chapter 3: New Descisions**

"Daddy?"

"Yes, Larry?"

"What do you want for your Birthday?"

Bowser squeezed his son tightly. He was glad such a tiring day was over. "I don't need anything; I've got an entire kingdom and eight wonderful kids."

Larry frowned. He had been told by his older siblings to see what they could get their father for his birthday, and he didn't intend on failing. "You must want _something_."

Bowser gazed longingly at his pictures lined against the wall. His deceased mother and father, his ancestors and the other great Kings of Darkland, and a picture of his children climbing all over him at a reunion he had with his siblings. Even Wendy was enjoying it, and, Bowser remembered, that was all to do with her beloved aunt Magarie.

Underneath the memorial picture was a large snapshot of Princess Peach, holding out her hand to feed little birds.

"There are things I want, Larry." Bowser replied slowly. "But you can't get me any of them."

Larry glared where his father had been looking. _Grand Mama and Popop are dead, so are all them other dead people. Auntie Mag is too far away, but Mama Peach…she's alive. _Larry grinned and leapt off his father's lap. "Tuck me in, Dad?"

"Sure. You'd better get in your bed soon, you've got school tomorrow."

Larry looked up at his father, still glancing at the photograph wall. Obviously he was out of it. Tucking his son in _and_ thinking there was school on a Saturday. Larry decided not to tell his father the day and ran up his staircase. With thudding steps, his father followed. Larry smiled and pushed open the door on his right, the one with his face, including signature spiked hair, etched in the door. He scampered into the room and blew on a single candle, thus lighting the whole line of flame around his room. He pushed himself out of his shell and into his pajamas then dived onto his steel plank bed, fluffed with dozens of parakoopa feathers.

"Daddy!" He outstretched his hands as his father lumbered over and slipped the blanket over his body.

"G'night, Larry Berry." Bowser ruffled his son's hair affectionately. "You want the lights on?"

"Yeah."

"M'kay." Bowser turned and walked out, pulling the door behind him. As the heavy slab slowly turned to a close, Larry could see his father glancing at several framed pieces of almost identical long, golden strands of silky hair. To anyone but the KoopaKing, the pieces were the same. But to Bowser, each told a story of Princess's Peach's stays under his claw. Finally, the door sealed with a clang.

After a few minutes, Larry leapt out of his bed and rushed to a small Yoshi Egg replica on his shelf. He pressed the center spot and a low buzz emitted. "Larry to Ludwig, come in!"

"Pshhh….Larry…all clear…Pshhhh…?" The egg with Ludwig von Koopa's voice questioned.

Larry pushed the egg's spot again. "Yeah, Dad left a while ago. Should be safe."

"Pshhh…we'll come then…pshhh….your designs work….?...pshh…"

Larry bit a claw. "Er, I haven't tested them yet but…"

"Psh….never mind that….pshhh…we'll come….pshhh…"

Larry stared at his stone walls. _I hope my calculations work…_As planned, the stones began to slide out. Larry rushed to help pull them out and a nice tunnel was suddenly in view, Ludwig climbing out. The oldest of the kooplings grinned. "Great job with the tunnel. Sent an eggram to the others, they should be here soon."

As expected, their siblings started climbing out, some congratulation Larry on his work, others, mainly Wendy, complaining of the dirt.

"Whens we gonna get this over with?" Roy aked hotly.

"Soon as possible, I hope. Beauty sleep is precious, you know!" Wendy complained.

"Alright, let's get started then! Larry, what did you find out?" Lemmy asked.

Larry smiled. "Dad wants nothing but Mama Peach!"

Morton grunted, "We knew that, spike-brain!"

Ludwig glared at his brother. "No, Morton, we might be able to use that. Sure, its old news, but wouldn't Dad be thrilled…"

Iggy was catching on. "…if Princess Peach was in his claws on his birthday! Credit to us, of course."

Ludwig showed his teeth in a grin. "Exactly!" He reached into the back of his pajamas and pulled out a bunch of parchment, some scribbled on with random musical notes and remarks to himself. He flattened them and brandished an ink pen. The kooplings huddled around him as he bit off the end and ink started to run. "Planning starts…now."

xxxx0o0o0o0o0o0o0xxxx

Peach flipped through her diary carelessly. One would think being princess wouldn't give any free time, but Peach often had nothing but. Her father ruled behind the scenes, but rule he did. As long as he lived, King Toadstool took care of every single legal thing brought to the monarchy's attention. Besides that, the Mushroom Kingdom was practically a democratic monarchy and that made Peach and her father almost nothing but names. Big names, yes, but except for banquets, legal announcements,and other trivial affairs, they had nothing to do.

That didn't mean Peach's diary was empty. On the contrary, her diary was more filled, intense, and emotional then a soap opera. Her pages lingered on her experiences under the capture of Lord Grodus and his X-Nauts. A specific passage caught her eye, one of many times pondering the peculiar situation TEC-XX gave her.

"_Tec is, indeed, the weirdest beau I ever hope to have. At least he's not bald, bumbling, or evil like some I've had. And at least it's not Grodus. But still, I have to give him credit. It's nice to see that…oh, It's just nice to be loved. And really know that I'm loved. It's gross and disturbing, especially since he's a computer, and its kind of frustrating that 'his perfectness' will probably admit his feelings before Mario gets around to it._

"_The way he describes his…attraction…to me is both scary and enlightening. There have been others…more realistic men…who I expect have these feelings. I know I sometimes have them towards others…one specific plumber comes to mind…but does this plumber have them back to me? Mario's so hard to read, sometimes it seems like he never talks at all. Honestly, other people will talk their mouths off and all he'll do is nod. Oh, he'll talk about his plans for us a lot. Asking my toads what the legalizations for marrying a princess are, how one becomes prince, etcetera. He's even hinted that I should meet his parents face to face, especially since they moved into the realm. _

"_Mr. and Mrs. Mario now live in Grand Canal City instead of Brooklyn. I've only been to Grand Canal a few times, but it is always so gorgeous. Mario and Luigi may have been the best plumbers in Brooklyn, but I think Grand Canal would put them out of business. The streets are literally rivers with gondolas sliding through them. I can't wait to go; maybe it'll be there, in the romantic atmosphere, that Mario will admit his feelings. I certainly hope so. While we're there I'll…"_

Peach closed her diary. If it had taken so long for Mario to accomplish that thing he planned way back before they went to Rougeport, she could only imagine when they'd get married. And, of course, he had postponed it- again.

Peach fell back onto her bed and stared at her ceiling. _I told all my toads I was going this week, leaving tomorrow. They won't be ready to keep me. They'll be willing, of course, but I don't want to spring something like my staying here on them last minute. It would be nice to get out and about this week though, just for me. But…I couldn't possibly…Well, I suppose _looking_ couldn't hurt._ Peach stood up and grabbed her atlas. She flipped through the pages thoughtfully, admiring each location before finally tossing the book aside.

A knock sounded at her door. "Miss Princess?" the high voice asked. Peach walked over and opened her door, looking down at an especially short toad maid, her mushroom cap pink and red with a classic maid outfit on.

"Oh, hi Ty T. What is it?"

"I was wondering if you need help packing."

"Well I…sure."

Ty T. smiled and pulled a bin out from behind her. "I chose some clothing that would be fantastic for Grand Canal. They're in the warm season, so I made sure to pack your summer clothes!"

Peach shuffled through a few of the clothing items. "Thanks, Ty T. This'll speed things up a lot, I'm sure."

"Aren't you excited? The Gardens of Gold should be open this time of year. And you've worked so hard lately, you could use a vacation." Ty T. smiled and instinctively straightened the blankets that Peach's lie-down had wrinkled.

Peach ignored her maid's actions. "Yes…yes I certainly could."

Ty T. gave a smile that looked almost pained, as if every second she wasted fraternizing with the princess was a needle to her skin. But she continued. "Make sure Mario doesn't overload you with activities. Make some time to yourself, that's what Grand Canal is second-best for, spending time with yourself."

Peach smiled. _I don't have to worry about _that _this week._ "What's it first-best for?"

"Spending time with others." Ty T. giggled. She then shook herself out of the sociable mood she had been in. Ty T. bowed and excused herself, leaving Peach and her suitcases.

Staring at them, piled against each other, Peach realized she had to go. There was no better time to slip out, unnoticed. It was as if fate had planned it for her.

Peach pressed her fingers against her forehead. _It sure would help if I knew where I was going…I'll decide tomorrow at the airport._ Peach considered asking Bah T., the castle's buff garage expert, for transportation, but instead turned her way towards the phone book perched on her shelf. Peach slid a long fingernail through the "T"s and found the many expansive pages with 'Taxi' written on them. Since Mario obviously wouldn't be picking her up, she needed to find her own ride.

Her fingers danced over the listings and stopped at one that remarked it was the 'most reliable and best kept secret in Toad Town Transportation'. Peach tapped her chin as she glanced at the price. Only 20 coins for a ride to the airport was a great deal, and the excellent price would be able to slip by on her bills without second thought by the toads. She picked up the hefty book and carried it over to the phone, quickly and quietly dialing the number on a nearby phone.

After a single ring, a calm female voice answered, "You've reached Toad Town Taxi Emporium, and how may I help you?"

Peach fiddled with the phone cord as she answered. "Yes, I'd like to request a pick up from my home to the airport tomorrow morning."

"What time would you like?"

"Er, how about…9 o'clock in the morning?"

"How many will be riding?"

"Just one. And I've got just a few bags….six or seven."

"Just a few?" the voice sounded amused, but continued her questions, unaware the conversation was being listened to and analyzed...countless miles away.

* * *

**Author's Note:** I hope you enjoyed this chapter, but you know all those promises I made about how grand it was? Well it turns out when you seperate a chapter into 2...the grandness kind of goes to the next one. (Which is very short, so I'll be updating soon, given I get some reviews. Because, you know the deal, no reviews, no posting.)

Thanks to Casiana1 and BlastosX4 for reviewing both chapters so far, and I hope for more from you all. Glad to see you guys like it so far, and I hope for many chapters to come. :)

Razzi


	4. Fateful Planning

Sorry, I kind of was slow updating the chapter I promised to be fast on. :3 Um, not much to say for this one. It was shorter, but I added some, including the Bowser's POV section and a bit of dialouge here and there...just regular additions. Oh, and cookie to whoever notices the little...reference thing to last chappie.

Disclaimer: (I keep forgetting to do these!) Only character I own this chapter are the two congress representatives.

* * *

Miles away, in the Volcanopalace, Roy was leaning back in his chair, tapping his claws on the desk as he stared at the math equation in front of him. He grumbled at the weekend math homework and peered harder through his heavy sunglasses at the numbers, wishing they would just get up and off the page.

In the background, the steady flow of words coming from the Toadstool Palace's telephone lines mumbled out. One of the palace's secretaries had been gossiping with her friend for going on two hours, taking up one of the four phone-line slots the interceptor had recording power for. The interception suddenly grew louder as another voice otherthan the gossipy secretary picked up on the reception.

Expecting it to be simply another toad, Roy rolled his eyes and kept thinking. The job was monotonous, but he couldn't turn down his turn at "listening" to any and all information that came out of the castle. The siblings' plan for their father's birthday couldn't, at any expense, be stopped, especially by any change of plans coming from the castle.

However, the voice wasn't that of a toad. Peach's high pitched voice caught Roy's ears and caused him to put the pencil down as he heard the princess plan her taxi ride. His eyes bulged behind the sunglasses and a maniacal grin crossed his features. Roy picked himself up and ran to the doorway, happily aware that, because his father was out on legal business, the palace was void of everyone but the kooplings and servants.

"LUDWIG-LARRY-LEMMY-IGGY-JUNIOR-MORTON-WENDY!" the koopling roared at the top of his lungs. Doors slammed and claws smacked stone floors as the kooplings ran in turn up to Roy's room.

In anticipation, the third oldest koopling turned back to the interceptor, happily spinning its tapes as Peach spoke with the Taxi operator. A second little red light blinked showing recordation, as it automatically did each time the phone was picked up at the castle.

Ironically arriving in the order of their summoning, the kooplings rushed into Roy's room.

"Yeah, Baldy?" Morton grunted.

In response, Bowser Junior gasped. "Listen," he squealed, hopping up and down, causing his tiny ponytail of hair to flip. "Listen, Mama Peach!"

Larry's eyes brightened behind his thick glasses as he pushed past his other siblings. "Yeah, but listen to what she's _saying!_"

Roy smirked and put his claws on his hips. "Toldja it was woith it, didn't I?"

The siblings quieted as the conversation between Peach and the taxi operator continued.

"So where should I pick you up?"

"Where Mario Track connects to the Toadstool Castle entrance path. At 9 a.m, sharp."

The operator sounded surprised. "The castle? Oh…alright then. We'll send our best drivers. May I have a name to mark on the records?"

"Yes, Peach Toadstool."

"Thank you, Miss Toadstool. Please remember this number as your account number to use for any cancellation, your bill, and ecetra. 187."

"One-Eight-Seven?"

"That's right. We'll see you tomorrow morning. Good bye!"

"Good bye." _Click_.

xxxx0o0o0o0o0xxxx

Bowser wrenched the door of the Darkland Congress break room open and marched in, heading for the JavaLava machine as he always did after an especially nerve-wracking Congress session. Usually they were worst when it seemed congress had actually agreed on something Bowser didn't. Unanimous votes, the only way Darkland could veto-over Bowser, were almost impossible, but they didn't exactly seem to like the National Finger Removal day Bowser had suggested. Luckily for them, he didn't exactly care for it either. Simply was bored and wanted to throw the idea out.

The sight at the JavaLava machine didn't brighten his day any. Trapped in each others' arms, the B Male representative from the Northern Cliffs and the C Female representative from Richton Fields didn't seem to see the KoopaKing well enough to have the sense to cease their, er, mating rituals.

Bowser gripped each head with his claws, and peeled their faces apart, then quickly rammed them back together by the foreheads. Bowser smirked at the shouts of pain and rubbing of foreheads that ensued. As they turned, forcibly respectfully to the king, he growled, "VolcanoPalace is the biggest building in the country. I'm sure you can find a better room for that kind of illegal…stuff."

As the Richton Fields rep was about to bow and follow the king's advice, the Northern Cliffs representative spoke up. "It's not illegal for two members of the congress to express personal affection while on duty, I checked, sir."

Bowser growled. "What's your name?"

The koopa representative stuttered his answer. "Mar…Marcus Levston, sir. Of the North…northern cliffs…si..sir."

"Well, I never liked you in the first place, Barkus Chevston. You're really pushing it. You and Miss pink hair over there find some other room."

'Miss Pink hair', as Bowser called her, self consciously touched the pink bangs on her head, thus touching the bruise from her and Marcus' crash at the same time. She let out a tiny "ow", cueing Marcus to step over to the Break Room's freezer.

Bowser glared at Marcus. "What do you exactly think you're doing?" He spat.

Marcus lifted a small ice-pack out of the freezer and showed it to the king. "Getting ice…for…you know…Tia's head."

"How charming," Bowser snarled. "I'm sure she'll thank you for your chivalry in ANOTHER ROOM."

Marcus hurried over to Tia and the couple rushed out of the room, Tia giggling as Marcus gripped her hand and showed her out.

Bowser poured himself a cup of steaming JavaLava, a creamy drink with a bit of MagmaSpice mixed in to give it its famous kick. Bowser downed the cup in one slurp and slunk into an oversized chair. He smiled as his mind wandered to what it would be like if _he_ were in the two koopas' place, he and his princess…

Bowser snapped himself out of the day dream and scowled at the door that Tia and Marcus had just raced out of. Furious, he chucked the empty cup at the door. The ceramic cup burst into shards when it connected with the steel, not quite drowning out Bowser's infuriated roar.

"Stupid Love!"

xxxx0o0o0o0o0xxxx

The recording fizzled to a stop and the interceptor automatically lowered its own volume, one of Larry's brilliant features on it. The kooplings almost seemed silent in wonder at the new report Roy had uncovered.

Roy continued to smirk at the other kooplings as Ludwig wrote notes as fast as his claws could move his quill.

Wendy even smiled. "This sure makes it a heck of a lot easier."

"Psh, Yeah. Donchu know it!" Roy told them with a waving claw.

Lemmy stepped over to the interceptor and looked at his siblings with his lazy eye. "May I do the honors?"

"Oi! I found it, rainbowhead! Don't you go takin' my glory."

Lemmy rolled his good eye. "But you've got a voice even the interceptor can't mask." Lemmy patted the machine lovingly as Roy sighed and nodded. Thrilled, he pressed a few buttons, selected a few clips, and finally clicked the blue 'redial' button. The kooplings heard a single ring before the phone at the Toad Town Taxi Emporium was answered.

A slightly different voice from the one that answered Peach's call said, "You've reached Toad Town Taxi Emporium, and how may I help you?"

As Lemmy calmly spoke into the interceptor's microphone, his voice suddenly sounded just like Peach's. "Yes, I'd like to cancel an appointment I just made to have a taxi come to my home at nine tomorrow morning. My account number is one-eight-seven."

The other end could be heard clicking a few buttons on a computer and replying, "Is this Peach Toadstool?"

"Yes, I've found other means of transportation."

A few other clicking noises were heard before the operator spoke again. "You're appointment has been canceled, Miss Toadstool. Have a nice day."

"You too. Goodbye!"

The operator replied with a click and the siblings turned back to one another.

"I've got my license, you know," Wendy hinted to her brothers.

The kooplings grinned at each other. There was no better time to, er, _help_ Peach slip out, unnoticed. It was as if fate had planned it for them…

* * *

**Author's Note:** There you go. Hope you enjoyed it somewhat. Thanks to you all for the reviews, especially Kari, Blastos X4, and Casiana1. I was really pleased to see all the wonderful reviews for last chapter (even without Casi's double review.;)) and look forward to some more for this one! You know the deal- R&R for more. Next chapter's a nice one, Peach FINALLY leaves her house. :)


	5. The Departure

**Foreword:** I had a sudden and strange desire to update. Maybe if I get review, I'll have another one of those strange desires! I say "strange" because I've been busy with other stories of late. Ehem, I'm off track.

I like this one for certain reasons, dislike it for certain reasons. But I hope you enjoy it. I'm really sorry I haven't been updating, like I said, I've been busy. But summer's coming up, so that should be good news.

Disclaimer: I don't own anybody that Nintendo does. It just doesn't work that way.

* * *

Peach couldn't tear her eyes away from the mirror. Today she would be taking a step she had never taken before. She had tried to separate herself from guardians on vacations before, but never had she ventured out completely alone- and especially not lying about it. And yet, her reflection showed none of the quiet fear her heart concealed.

There she was, dressed in her "traveling" dress with matching flats hidden under its billowing bottom. The dress was a nice periwinkle blue with a very light weave but the same design as her regular pink gown, including having a prominent jewel on her chest- pink instead of the normal blue. Honestly, Peach liked it best for its abilities to make her blend in from anyone looking from afar. She honestly didn't mind all the attention, praise, and gifts she got, but when she wanted to be alone it always seemed impossible to do just that. And she despised being treated differently because of the crown on her head.

Her hands reached the jewelry piece as her thoughts did the same. Peach lifted it off her flowing blonde hair and stared at it. Sighing, Peach realized that it could be considered treason for putting her tiara away while she left the country. She let a small smile grace her features as she imagined Athorih T.'s reaction. '_Hm Hm, now what is this, Princess? Removing the only visual proof of your political position to those unfamiliar with your political position, Hm Hm? Certainly a violation of Clause 3 in Section A of Chapter 28 in Volume 4 of 'The Guidelines of Political Power in the Mushroom Kingdom'. It _clearly_ states that 'no one political official may remove visual evidence of their position when entering an area that their power may be questioned, including, but not limited to, badges, scepters, patches, cuffs, mushroom caps, excessive adornments, and crowns.' Hm Hm, Tiaras are included, Princess. Treason is not an acceptable vacation activity for a Princess, Hm Hm!_

Against her better judgment, Peach placed the crown in its case, justifying that she was already acting treasonous on many other accounts, what with her lying to practically everyone in the kingdom. _A foul justification…_

Peach pulled her hair into a ponytail and let it rest on her back before feeling completely satisfied. She checked the gold clock- 8:22 a.m. Peach had just enough time for breakfast. She pressed a small gold button on the wall and heard a cheerful beep of reply. "Yes, Your Highness?" the speaker beneath the button asked.

"I'd like some assistance with my luggage and some breakfast."

"We'll send some help for your luggage, milady. What would you like for breakfast?"

"Oh, I don't really care. Whatever Har T. feels like cooking up, as long as it's fast. I need to get out soon."

"Toadsworth would like to escort you to your cab, with your permission."

"Fine. Tell him he can help direct the luggage to the pick-up location while I eat."

"Yes, Your Highness."

Peach lifted her gloved finger from the button and headed toward the Breakfast Hall. As she sat, Har T., a rather tubby toad cook with his small white apron tied over his white pants that was almost completely covered by rolls of fat, placed a plate of steaming pancakes in front of Peach. Har T. flashed her a contagious smile and grumbled that they were a new recipe, especially hearty for a long day of travel. Peach unleashed a smile of her own at the wonderful little toad. "Thanks, I'm sure they're great."

A clatter of steel on tile and a squeak of surprise sounded from the kitchen. A particularly short toad donned in the same apron as Har T. and a white and yellow mushroom cap rushed from the kitchen and faced the head chef, wringing her hands nervously. "Har T.? Me…I mean I…kinda fell…I mean dropped…but it was not accident…I mean, it _was_ accident…the blueberries from the…I mean for the...dinner." The toad swallowed a lump in her throat and sighed as if just completing a terrible task.

Har T. closed his eyes and shook his head before placing one of his large hands on the toad's back. "Then wash them again." As he followed the toad into the kitchen, Peach was left alone yet again.

_I'm going to miss them all._ Peach thought with a frown. The pancakes seemed to melt in her mouth as she tried to imagine waking up and not being sure if the breakfast would be good. Not being sure if it would be especially hearty for whatever she was doing that day. Not being sure if she'd have anyone begging to escort her places. As she took another bite, Peach realized she wasn't disappointed by the idea- it was, in fact, invigorating.

She finished her breakfast in silence and didn't even meet up with Toadsworth until half-way to the pick-up location. Toadsworth lifted his cane in surprise at the lone Princess. "I say, bit dangerous to go about on your own, wot!"

Peach was struck with a sudden fear Toadsworth had found out that she planned to be alone on her trip until she say the light in his eyes at the 'joke'. With good-humored sarcasm, Peach replied, "Oh yes, I was praying no one would abduct me as I walked a few yards on my own property, flanked by hundreds of guards."

"Well you never know what Bowser or some other koopa'll think of next, poppet," Toadsworth said, completely unaware of the irony of it all.

Peach smiled at her assistant as she reached her pile of luggage. She was proud to see him holding back his normal lectures before a trip, especially one she had asked him not to join.

Toadsworth however, did not share the same expression. "So Mario will meet you at the airport? And sit with you on the plane? And escort you all through Grand Canal?"

"Toadsworth, I'll be fine. Mario has never failed us before."

"Don't do anything daft, Peach." Toadsworth looked at his feet uncertainly. "You're sure these taxis are safe as a cracker?"

"It says they're the most reliable Taxi service in the city."

A large yellow van with the words "Toad Town Taxi Emporium" sprayed across it pulled up at the stop. A large toad with a humped-back and thick arms approached the Princess. If it wasn't for her long black hair situated under the cap and in front of some of her rather bulky features, Peach would have thought the buff toad to be a male. Her mushroom cap seemed to move instead of her mouth when the toad spoke, doing so in an impatient voice that didn't quite fit her image. "Miss Toadstool for 9 o'clock?"

With practiced politeness, Peach nodded and asked for help with her bags. Toadsworth, the driver, Bah T., and his koopa apprentice all bent over to pick up the princess's bulging luggage and put in the empty seats of the van. The driver had mentioned, again without moving her lips, that the trunk door was jammed. When she did so, Toadsworth looked nervous. Peach suspected it was because he feared a faulty cab, but the driver decided otherwise when his eyes wandered to her lips. "It's Botox, buddy. You gotta problem with that?"

Toadsworth shook his head vigorously. "No madam. Botox is simply cracking."

Peach sat in the empty seat, her blue dress folding neatly under her slim form. As the toad climbed into her own seat, she leaned out the window towards Bah T. and his Koopa apprentice. "Thanks for the help, handsome," the toad called out flirtatiously, but to Peach's surprise, the remark was not situated towards her buff servant Bah T. as most female toad's remarks were towards, but to his koopa friend who looked just as surprised as herself.

After a few minutes of the cab chugging down the road, Peach rummaged through her purse and found her pink cell phone. She dialed first Mario's number and waited for a few rings before his voice-mail picked up, explaining the Mario Bros' availability schedule for plumbing services. After the tone sounded, Peach said into the phone, "Hi, this is Peach, and this message is for Mario. I hopeyou're enjoying your plumbers convention with Luigi- make sure to getpicturesfor me. I hear the city is very pretty this time of year, though I'm not sure what the sewers look like." Peach giggled at her own joke and took a breath- this was a seriousphone-call, not a time for chatting."I won't be available all week, including from my cell-phone. I'm going on a bit of a vacation before _our_ vacation seeing as the toads were all ready for my absence. No need to worry, I'll be perfectly OK, but don't try and reach me, you won't be able to." Peach paused for a second before continuing. "I'll be waiting for you at the airport on Saturday so we can leave for Grand Canal around noon. I'm excited to spend the week with you and your parents. Thinking of you! Bye." Peach hung up and sighed. The next message would be harder.

Peach rubbed her fingers on her temples as she thought through exactly what she needed to tell her servants. She saw, through the corner of her eye, her driver peer back at her. The driver pressed a button on her radio and spoke in what sounded like the infamous taxi-code. "Eagle securely in the nest. No thought of flying yet. Path still secure to destination A. Any wing flapping should induce immediate wing clipping. In and In."

The radio crackled back, "Good. Request alert of wing clipping time. In and out."

Peach ignored the ominous radio reports as the radio turned back to the regular taxi radio speak, free of bird allusions. Peach dialed the number to Toadsworth's home phone and waited as the answering machine clicked on, explaining in Toadsworth's cheery accent that he wasn't available. After the tone sounded, Peach said, "Hi Toadsworth, this is Peach. When you get this message I'll already be at my destination. Perfectly safe. I promise. No one knows where I'm going, but its not Grand Canal. And it's not with Mario. Don't freak out, he knows that I've left for vacation without him, but I'll be perfectly safe. However, no one will be able to contact me. Trust me, I'll be perfectly fine. I won't let anyone know who I am unless I have to. It'll be just like a regular vacation for regular people- a spot of _me_ time.

"And, I'll be at the Toad Town Airport on Saturday at Noon to leave with Mario for our _real_ trip to Grand Canal, so if the toads want to bring me fresh luggage or whatever, tell them they can do that there. And if you want to chastise me, write it on a letter and send it to Mario. He'll get it to me. Please don't worry about me; I just needed a bit of a break from everything.

"Could you tell Daisy for me? Oh, and Toadsworth," Peach placed her hand over her mouth towards the receiver, as if fearing her message would be overheard by the wrong ears. "I have the GPS. But I'll only use it for complete emergencies. Only then. And I found the bugs Securih T. put on my things so don't expect those to work. Bye Toadsworth, see you Saturday."

Peach sighed with relief and held down the "hang up" button on her phone until a few notes played and "Good Bye" faded off her cell-phone's screen. She closed her eyes for a little bit until the driver spoke up to her.

"Your Highness? The road's blocked, I'm taking an alternate route."

"That's fine," Peach replied. She already felt on vacation and just imagined the fit Toadsworth would have when he heard the message. But she didn't seem to care…

The driver spoke up again. "Interesting plans you have. Know where you're flying?"

Peach opened one eye to see if she could tell the drivers' intentions, but her eyes were glued on the road. "No," she replied and closed her eye again.

"Why don't you want anyone reaching you?"

Peach smiled. "I'm on a vacation. If I wanted to be bothered, I'd go on a business trip. Surely you know what I mean? For me it's like the difference between…say…a no-hire drive without the radio and one with? Except my 'radio' is much more persistent about _me_."

The driver nodded in understanding and pressed the radio button again. "Eagle is out of touch with flock. I repeat- Eagle cannot even chirp. Hawk is far away, coming to fly with eagle on week's end. Same with flock. In and in."

The radio crackled out a reply. "Wait, the Eagle isn't going to fly with the Hawk? And flock is perched? In and in!"

The driver grinned. "Precisely. Eagle left to soar alone. For a week. No chirping with flock at all. In and In."

"And….you're sure about this? In and in."

The taxi pulled over to the side of the road and stopped.

"Clip the wings and I'll explain. In and in."

"Already? Are we even at Destination A? In and in."

Peach shifted uncertainly in her chair. The radio conversation was sounding less and less like a taxi radio and more and more about…her.

"Not a vehicle in site. Looks good enough to me. Clip the wings. In and out." The driver lifted her finger from the radio button.

Peach heard an odd noise coming from behind her. Scratching, moving, and…it seemed like…a voice or two. Peach looked over her shoulder in fear as a koopling head, thick glasses on its nose and rainbow hair on its head grinned at her, a syringe in his claw. "Excuse me, miss."

Peach didn't even have time to scream.

She felt a prick and heard a squirt.

Her vision was blurring…

Her head was getting heavy…

She thought she saw the toad lift her mushroom cap off her head…

She thought she saw _another_ head underneath it…

She couldn't tell, she was unconscious.

* * *

**Author's Note: **Righto, I hope you enjoyed that chapter as much as I did writing it. It gets fun from here on out- the fluff should start poking its head out in a couple of chapters.

This story isn't ending any time soon, if you were wondering. I've got so many ideas floating around where to take it, but my motivation comes from helpful reviews. Please give them! You've given a lot in the past (major props to those who've stuck with this story, and thankies to those looking in on it!) and I really appreciate it.


	6. Arrival

**Foreword:** Sorry its taken me so long to get this up, guys. I had major technical difficulties and actually got this chapter to you by semi-cheating, thanks to my friend on this accound with the LJ story. :) So besides that, this chapter has plenty of koopalings. So that's good, cause there fun. However, I don't think the chapter itself is as good as past ones. Oh, and something important-

Obviously, this story takes place within all canon Mario games released as of now. It does not, and will not, involve the upcoming Mario games, neither Super Mario Galaxy nor Super Paper Mario. (They both look absolutely brilliant though…for fellow BowserxPeach fans reading this (and just plain Mario world fans) I highly suggest you google Super Paper Mario. There's even a wedding scene- you heard me a wedding scene- between Bowser and Peach!) I won't be done with this fic by the time those get out (Super Paper is scheduled for as early as October) and will almost positively not change the story to fit it. My predictions are that these upcoming games will change the universe of the Mushroom Kingdom and the characters relationships- forever. (profound sounding, huh?) I might write another story taking place after them, but not this one is not it. Got it? Good.J Now, lets get on with the story! (If you forgot where we are, Peach was just anatheticized by who we discovered to be Iggy and is traveling in a taxi- she believes to the airport. So she's kidnapped. It makes more sense if you reread last chappie though.)

* * *

Wendy O. threw the face/mushroom cap mask onto the seat next to her and turned to face her brother. "How is she?"

Iggy was leaning over princess Peach's unconscious form. "Perfectly fine, except for the whole not-conscious thing. You're positive about what she said?"

Wendy nodded. "If you don't believe me, I've got it on tape. She is not in contact with her servants or Mario at all. They all expect her to be peacefully in Grand Canal right now. It couldn't _be_ more perfect." Iggy didn't look as thrilled as Wendy felt that the plan had taken such a surprising, though very much welcome, turn for the better. "Iggy! Everything is perfect! Why are you so freaked?"

Iggy sighed through his nose, letting out a small puff of smoke. "It's almost _too_ perfect, Wendy. There's gotta be a catch."

Wendy rolled her eyes. "Catch or not, we're fine. You know how many precautions we went to teh make sure this was perfect even _before_ we found out about this."

Iggy looked away from his sister. "I know…I just…I just don't want Dad's present to mess up." Quickly, as if to show his sister he was _not_ going soft on her, he added, "you know he'll be fuming just from us doing this. Imagine what would happen if we actually messed up."

Wendy rolled her eyes and faced the road again. "That's why we're not messing up." She pressed the taxi back into gear and it lurched down the road at double speed, taking all the illegal short-cuts she could without being pulled over.

Within a few minutes, the taxi had arrived at their "destination A", a small building with peeling paint and a rusted garage.

Wendy leapt out of the taxi and happily pulled off the rest of her costume, throwing it by the mask. Iggy lovingly pulled Peach limply out of the backseat while his sister, adjusting her bow, rapped on the building's door. The door was pulled open to the extent of the lock-chain and her younger brother's eye peered at her through the opening.

Morton Jr.'s gruff voice mumbled something that sounded to Wendy like "password". She sighed and rolled her eyes. "You boys are so stupid. You know who we are, let us in."

"That's not the password."

"Whatever. Cheesepuff."

The door shut before it swung open the entire way. Larry rushed to the door, Lemmy right behind him. "Wendy? What are you doing here? You're not due for another 5 minutes!"

Wendy shrugged. "Things went better than we expected. Let's get on with it."

Larry stared down his older sister. "How's the Eagle?"

Wendy rolled her eyes yet again, exasperated to the limit by her brothers. "_Princess Peach_ is perfectly fine. She's with Iggy."

Larry frowned at Wendy. "You should stick to the codenames. The flock could be anywhere."

"They're gone, Larry. Her servants _and_ Mario. Gone. Don't suspect a thing. Everything is more than perfect right now."

Larry looked confused. "Wait, the flock and the hawk are gone? What do you mean?"

Roy's shoulder brushed Larry's as he passed him to help Iggy with Peach. "Wendee's right, bud. Cut the codenames, ain't no one teh hear 'em."

Larry made a face at Roy's back and turned again to his sister. "What happened?"

Wendy inspected her claws proudly as she said, "Just get everybody together and get rid of the van. Then we'll explain. Oh but first," She grinned maliciously at her brother's frustrated expression. "Can you get the tape out of the recorder?" She flashed a smile at both Larry and Lemmy before brushing past them and into the shack.

Bowser Jr. decided to stop screaming at Morton for the pure fun in it when Wendy stepped in the one-room building. His face lit up and he rushed to the window, smashing his face against the glass. Through the filthy window, Junior could see Roy and Iggy struggling with the Princess's limp form, Iggy shouting to the approaching Larry and Lemmy to get her luggage.

Junior peeled his face off the window and faced his siblings in the room. He turned his ecstatic expression into what he decided was a menacing snarl and placed his tiny claws on his hips. "Come on Lazy Lumps! We gotta get Mama Peach and her stuff!" Not waiting to see the effect of his mandate, he ran out of the building. Morton called after him that they "already knew" and called him a "brainless, no-brained, squashed-up squash".

xxxx0o0o0o0o0xxxx

Finally, after several minutes of moving of Peach and her luggage from the van to the building and pushing the van they had 'borrowed' into a near river, the koopalings were ready for Iggy and Wendy's explanation. They sat in a circle, the recorder in the middle. Wendy and Iggy took turns explaining exactly what had gone on in the car. The group listened to the recording a second time when Lemmy pointed out the muffled part of Peach's message to Toadsworth.

Larry gripped the recorder and pressed several buttons until the message sounded clearly through the room, the words now clear, though slurred. "IhavethejeepeeEss. Butillonlyuseitforemergencies. Andonlythen." Larry pressed stop. Ludwig glanced up. "Ay, there's the rub."

Lemmy's lazy eye spun around the group, searching to see if anyone else was confused by Ludwig's allusion. He saw no expressions that told if he was alone in his confusion or not, so he voiced his question. "What do you mean?"

Ludwig looked up at his brother. "Peach said that she has a GPS for emergencies. Undoubtedly, her seizure would be considered a big enough of a conundrum to use it."

Iggy caught his brother's confusion remaining. "A GPS is something that tells somebody exactly where you are. So you could be hiding in the desert and they could find where you are within an inch. And Peach is probably going to use it."

Lemmy gasped. "So….they could find the Darklands!"

"Slow enough, Slowy McSlowston?" Morton grunted.

Bowser Jr. growled, "We can't let them do that! We have to make the jeepee-thingy not work. Or get rid of it."

Iggy glanced at the youngest koopaling. "Excellent idea, but how?"

Wendy rolled her eyes and sighed dramatically. "Duh. We'll hide it. If they, like, try and find her, it'll lead them to where she's not. They'll panic. But if the GPS is the only way she can communicate, then they won't know _why_ it's not on her, only that it is. And, like, when they find where it leads, their problem. Let them she lost it. People loose stuff."

Lemmy frowned. "Can't she tell them what happened?"

Wendy flicked her brother's head with a finely manicured claw. "No, there's like, no reception at all in Darklands."

The siblings were quiet for a few seconds before Roy spoke up. "'Ey! Lets get workin' then, huh? Juniboy, find the bugs on Peachy. Iggy, hide 'em someplace good."

Junior leapt up and over to Peach and her things. "What does a Jeepeethingee look like?"

Larry walked over to help his brother and the pair quickly found the small system, disguised as a compact, a tell-tale antenna poking out of it. Iggy took the system and tossed it into the depths of a nearby parked dump truck, the toad driver unconscious in the same manner as Peach. Roy was ordering his siblings around as they lugged the Princess's things into an oversized clowncar.

Finally, the group lifted the Princess into the cot they had prepared for her in the clowncar. Junior took the opportunity to cover her with his favorite blanket. Peach tossed her head to one side in her unconscious state and all the siblings took their seat in a row of chairs, Wendy at the car's front with Larry.

Grinning, she turned to face the other koopalings. "Let's go."

As Toad Town began its usual hustle and bustle of the late morning, the clowncar rose steadily from the hidden patch of vacant lots and the peeling-paint building. Wendy pulled the clowncar into soaring gear as Morton criticized her about things he himself had absolutely no idea about. The clowncar soared off into the direction of the sea, continuously climbing into the shelter of the clouds, as all of the Mushroom Kingdom below lived completely unaware of anything.

xxxx0o0o0o0o0xxxx

Bowser pitched a huge bowling ball of igneous rock down an alley. As if it was simply a baseball, the ball never once hit the floor of the alley, striking the pins at the alley's end with stunning force, pressing them all against the far wall, splitting the center pin perfectly in half. The remaining pins spun left and right until the alley automatically set them straight.

"Hole in one!" Bowser roared triumphantly.

"I believe the term is 'Strike', sir, but Hole in one works too!" Kammy informed him.

Bowser turned to face his bowling party and smiled. "Of course it does! I said it! That's what everyone will say now." He, Kammy, a dry bones soldier and Kooka, a high ranking troop in Bowser's personal guard, had all made it to the finals of his personal bowling tournament, held once a week for the last two months.

They each wore matching bowling outfits slipping under their shells, Bowser's having spiked shoulders. Bowser's ball clanked to a stop in the ball vault next to the dry bones', pushing Kooka's green one to the front. "You're up, Kooky."

Bowser stepped over to the table and sipped his soda while Kooka played his rounds, ending with one pin remaining. After a sigh of disappointment, he found a seat next to the king.

Kammy hobbled over to the alley and levitated her ball over to her. She held it in her hand and mumbled something before sending it straight down the alley. Three pins knocked down and she tried again. While she bowled, Bowser spoke to Kooka.

"How's the pre-guard doing in training, Kooker?"

Kooka beamed in pleasure. His personal trainees were doing the best out of all the young koopas, goombas, koopakids, and other creatures in the pre-guard group. "Excellent. Conch Club, my group, is excelling to the next level within the month. The rest of them look like they can make it with the season, even Gator Guild."

Bowser nodded officially. "What's wrong with the Gator Guild?"

"They haven't memorized the pledge just yet."

"Who's leading them?"

Kooka bit his lip and tapped his foot in thought. "I think it was Korn. Korny Hull."

Bowser snorted in disdain. "Tell Korny to put his tail in action or he won't have it anymore."

"He doesn't have a tail, sire."

Bowser glared at Kooka. "Then make some other body part up, Koozook."

The dry-bones hobbled over to the king and Kooka. "'Ello sahs. Ees your turn, maje-stay."

Bowser grunted and looked up at the score. Below his dominating points, holding him in first, was the dry-bones, in second. Kammy was in last, and he was talking to Kooka, third place's holder. "Alright, you go for me, boneybutt. Use my ball."

"Yes sah, roight away sah!" The dry bones stepped over to Bowser's ball and strained himself to lift it. While lifting, his arms, still clutching the ball, popped right out of their sockets. Dry Bones sighed and pushed them back in, finally managing to lift it and just barely carry it over. But he soon realized, after a few minutes of futile trial, that the ball wasn't going anywhere. He turned back sadly to the king, lounging in his chair. "Eet's not movin', sah. Watchu wannme to do now?"

Bowser shrugged. "You've got a smart head. Use it."

The dry bones shrugged back. "Okie, sah." He dropped the ball and plucked his head right off his body and rolled it down the lane, striking the pins and earning Bowser another strike. Dry Bones' skull grinned at Bowser from the lane's end. "Hole in one, sah!"

xxxx0o0o0o0o0xxxx

Lemmy tapped his paddle-ball up and down as he slowly leaned back on the unconscious Princess. The light was growing stronger as the sun grew higher in the sky, the clowncar, biting through the clouds to its destination, blisteringly close to it. Out of the corner of his good eye, Lemmy saw Bowser Junior hop off his chair and storm over to his older brother. "Whaduya want?"

Junior glared. "Get off Mama Peach, Lemmy!"

"Why?"

"Because I said so."

"Why?"

"'Cause I'm important,"

"Why?"

"'Cause I'm Daddy's favorite,"

Iggy grunted in amusement at Junior's remark. The spit-fire of a koopling spun around to face him, now ignoring Lemmy's resting spot. He glared at Iggy, submerged up to the tips of his glasses in his latest book on the history of Lava.

"What'd you do that for?"

Iggy answered without even looking up. "You're not his favorite; otherwise you'd be born first."

Junior opened his mouth to make a rebuttal but, with the remark not making any logical sense in the first place, had nothing to do so with but an old saying. "Best saved for last!" When Iggy didn't even react to Junior's comment, he grinned at what he saw as a little victory. He turned back to stare at the sea of clouds as the clowncar took a sudden jerk.

When Junior fell flat on his face Morton let out a hearty laugh and some rude remark. Roy rushed over to Wendy and Larry's seats, Larry assisting and pushing several buttons while their sister steered.

Wendy seemed immersed in her work, listening to Larry's suggestions as she pulled various levers and turned a few wheels. Roy spoke up as the car slowly jerked backwards, pulling up higher with the tail end. "What you doin'?"

At the jerk, all Peach's luggage began sliding, piling threateningly on top of each other and close to the seats, Peach sliding almost off her cot. Larry and Wendy didn't seem to notice the koopalings struggling to keep themselves upright, let alone Peach and her luggage, or Roy's question. They continued with their actions, small sounds and lights emitting from the dashboard.

"Ah said, What you doin'?"

Larry finally answered. "Descending. Get everybody buckled in and the luggage strapped down."

In response, Roy reached for the car's microphone, but Wendy snatched it from his claw. She pressed a button and a well-toned _ding_ chimed as Wendy spoke up. "Passengers, the seat-belt light is now on, please buckle up and prepare for landing."

Roy snarled a sarcastic "Thanks" and flipped up his seat, creating the final block in the wall of chairs keeping the luggage secure. He sat in it, next to Iggy and an unconscious Peach. He looked at her, a tiny drop of drool forming at the corner of her mouth, and tenderly secured her buckle as well, wiping the droplet off her and onto the seat.

The clowncar revved loudly and the passengers braced themselves. With a maddened expression, Junior gripped the seat's arms; Iggy's gripping of the seat far less for excitement as he breathed in and out nervously. With a lurch, the car broke into the clouds, Junior playfully snapping at the evaporated liquid.

Larry pulled the wheel out of Wendy's reach, as her claws were laced over her eyes in fright. He ignored the sporadic yells of thrill and fright and pushed the car faster, faster, and finally tilting it to a lesser velocity, soaring through the skies to the great green mountains below them, forming a brilliant bowl, the far edges only just visible even from their great height.

As the car flew over them, several flags billowed out from its sides, sending off a wave of flags in reply dotted over the mountains, the sign of a legal pass into Darkland territory. The shadows of the mighty Koopa Mountain Range blanketed the seas between them and the expansive landmass that was the Darkland Mainland. The car slowed as it approached the thin covering of permanent smoke, tainting the bright and clear air they had just left into a darker shade. These clouds of smog, normally a sign of despair for many countries, showed the citizens of Darkland the lava still flowed, volcanoes still burst forth magma, the economy was still booming, and all was well.

VolcanoPalace, the almighty mountain of countless metals and rocks carved into generations of stories, KoopaKings, and impressive flourishes, rose above everything in the land. Patches of green and gold streamed through the busy cities in shades of greys, towns in vibrant primaries, and rivers of bright blues and stunning oranges, lava flowing through like veins.

Iggy couldn't help giving a deep breath of pride at his country as the clowncar descended towards one of VolcanoPalace's hangers. At the click of a button, the door's countless security devices opened and the clowncar soared to a quiet thud at its resting spot. The huge door sealed itself, Larry lighting the torches for his siblings. Wendy lifted herself onto the dashboard as her brothers started piling luggage out of the car. "What did I tell you? Perfect."

Morton gave one of his rare smiles, an ounce of smirk still there. "Aw, get off, ya big lug of a whore." Even _he_ couldn't help but admit, the plan had worked flawlessly. Their father was assigned to be at a meeting immediately after his bowling game, and the nearest hallway was closed for the day for major cleaning, Iggy had 'accidentally' spilt his permanent tomato juice that he happened to have on hand. The janitors were on lunch break and the path was clear to the room the siblings had decided to be Peach's private dorm. Everything seemed perfect.

xxxx0o0o0o0o0xxxx

Kamek wrung his hands as he stepped out of a bathroom, humming the song stuck in his head. The cheery little tune reflected his current mood, though he had no clue his day was just about to take a major nose-dive.

As he walked lazily towards his office, sounds of jovial laughter echoed through a nearby empty hall. His face fell as he walked towards the sounds. He peered through his glasses down the hall closed for cleaning and saw a flicker of light coming from the far end. Cautiously, he attempted lifting his leg over a rope barrier, but his old-age caught up with him as he teetered dangerously backwards. With a shout, Kamek fell flat on his his back. After a few futile moments of trying to get up, Kamek remembered his wand.

Silently cursing his forgetfulness, he gripped the wood and chanted his feet up and underneath himself. His back cracked grotesquely as his body realigned itself and Kamek tried to regain his dignity. _If anyone had seen that, their lives would be at stake,_ he thought angrily. _I am the 2nd in Command Magikoopa…I can do better than this!_ He took his wand and snapped the rope neatly in half before stepping down the hall.

The noises that had lessened drastically after his fall had regained all their volume. Whoever it was obviously didn't care a lot about the disturbance. He rounded a few bends, the small light on the tip of his wand growing useless as the light inched closer. Kamek felt a bit uncomfortable- the room he was approaching was the CC53 repair and testing hanger- the only clowncar that should have been in there was CC53, put on repair hiatus while the hallway was cleaned. CC53 was older but very spacious, King Bowser liked using it for family outings, meaning it hardly touched the sky. Goodness knows how many excuses for putting the repair on hiatus had passed over the Royal Clowncar Manager's desk.

By the fumes touching Kamek's nose, CC53 had recently been out, still had the leakage problem, and whoever had taken it had closed the hanger door- a health hazard if nothing else. Even more cautiously, Kamek stepped into full view of the hanger and gasped. With a smirk, he placed his aged hands on his hips and spoke out to the sight in front of him.

"Well, well…" he started, his audience captive with fear. "What do we have here...?"

* * *

**Author's Note:** Hope you enjoyed that chapter. I honestly have no clue when I can get the next chappie up- I'm really busy with a bunch of tasks I've given myself and a new story (not a FanFic) is itching my brain. But you know that cryptic system- comments inspire me to write more...hinthintnudgenudgewinkwink


	7. Explanation, Please?

**Foreword: **This isn't really one of my favorite chapters. I have a few "squee" bits ( bits I get really happy to write/read) in this, but really not that many. So I hope its not total crap. I hope its not too sped through, I couldn't figure out how to make the original content longer and more detailed without sounding too forced, y'know? So the Mario and Luigi bit is new. Kind of repetetive with previous bits, sorry.

Anyway! I hope you enjoy it regardless. You guys have got to be the best reviewers a girl could ask for. :)

* * *

Toadsworth hummed along as one of his favorite songs drew to a close in his car radio. A voice eased its way out as the song hit its last note, saying, "And that was _Mushroom Medly_ by Swee T. and the Girls. Be sure to buy their hit album, "It's Raining Goombas", a tribute to the oppressed Goombas in our very own Mushroom Kingdom. Now over to Koorpa for the weather." His voice ended and another began as Toadsworth turned down to his home street, small cottages in mushroom shape popping up around the street.

Toadsworth grabbed a dried chip out of the bag of fast-food he had picked up from "Fasty's Fish n' Chips". He sipped a bit of his tea and continued down the road, turning left onto his own street.

"Weather's looking great for the week, sunny skies until a bit of cloud coverage on Friday, leading up to a wet weekend. Temps in the 70's for the rest of today, getting down to high 60's in the evening. In other news, sky watchers saw a remarkable event today; a strange, rounded airship was seen leaving the area behind the mountains once owned by the great Marbini, now just a train of vacant lots. Some suspect it was Marbini's soul, flying out from his burial spot to gain revenge on Oscarduvelt, his last employer and suspected murderer, explaining the maniacal grin some sky watchers reported. Others say it was simply a UFO, or a confused shooting star. Whatever it was, I'm sure tha-"

The radio silenced as Toadsworth pulled the car into park and removed the ignition. He climbed out and walked towards his house, modeled after his own mushroomcap, humming the chorus to Mushroom Medly that wouldn't leave his head. He hit his answering machine's blinking "new messages" button and put his dinner on the table, grabbing another chip from the bag first.

He listened patiently through a telephone receipt of the beige paint he had ordered and his sister announcing that her son broke his finger and wouldn't be able to play violin at his sister's birthday party that Toadsworth wasn't even going to.

Toadworth pushed up his glasses as he heard Peach's voice sound. He leaned in closer to the machine in half denial of the message's contents.

Her message ended and Toadsworth stared at the machine as a new message about his grass growing a half centimeter over requirements. However, poor Toadsworth was still trying to comprehend Peach's message. He raced over and hit repeat, his face falling. _She didn't…she couldn't have…Peach_..._she's going to be the death of me, I just know it!_

The message repeated, Toadsworth praying it was just a joke. As it ended, he shook his head. No cryptic message, no sound of laughter, no tone or _any_ hints that she could be joking. He picked up his phone and dialed Peach's cell phone. After one ring, it switched to the message. Toadsworth sighed as Peach's prerecorded voice told him she wasn't available. The tone sounded and he launched into his message, far too nervous to lecture.

"Peach? Peach? When you hear this you need to call me RIGHT AWAY. Peach, this isn't funny, old gel, get home right now! You could get seriously hurt, I'm sure this is illegal anyway…Peach Toadstool, I order you to get home as soon as you can! If your father was here….. You call me RIGHT NOW, or there'll be serious trouble, miss!" Toadsworth hung up and dialed the code to the GPS. Nothing happened. "Drat, she turned that off too."

Toadsworth hit a few buttons on the phone and the entire phone (and desk panel under it) flipped itself over to reveal a bright red phone where the bland beige one had been. Toadsworth picked it up and hit "begin". As he spoke into it, his message was sent thorough the entire palace, just under a mile away. "Code Red, I repeat, we have a Code Red, version 4.4. Prepare a council." Toadsworth hit more buttons and the phone reverted back to the normal home phone. Dropping his chips and grabbing his keys again, Toadsworth left the house and climbed into the car. He grabbed the roof lights and strapping them to the roof of the car, allowing him to speed and bypass any car as well as any red light. Not normally one for speed, Toadsworth's foot was practically grinding the pedal to dust as he soared through the streets. _Peach, what were you thinking?_

xxxx0o0o0o0o0o0o0xxxx

Kammy was furiously trying to convince King Bowser about something she had been arguing so long over, she had forgotten what it was when her wand vibrated. "Excuse me, sire."

"Just pick up the wand, hag." Bowser mumbled gruffly. Rolling her eyes, Kammy did just that, holding it out in front of her and flicking the tip.

Out of the wand hovered visible "sound waves", peaking as the inflection in Kamek's voice raised.

"Kammy? Kammy is that you?"

"Of course it is, dimwad. What do you want?"

"I found something His Majesty might want to know about. In the CC53 hanger."

Bowser stepped up to the wand. "What'd you find? A stain?"

"No sire, something much more…interesting, let's say. You'll want to come right away!"

Bowser seated himself in a chair covered in tight, black leather. "I'm busy discussing something," he answered with a wave of his claw.

"Exactly what are you discussing? Because I think this is much bigger."

Bowser strained his mind for an answer. Coming up blank, he replied, "None of your business, mudmouth."

Silence reigned on the other side for a few seconds before Kamek spoke again, his voice pumped with thrill. "Sir, do you know where your children are?"

"How am I supposed to know?" Bowser snarled.

"Well, you might want to see this sire. Immediately."

Kammy glanced at her king who looked almost hopeful at the prospect of something exciting to do. _This is my moment with him, Kamek. Leave us be,_ she thought. Speaking aloud she told Kamek, "He already said he's busy, Kamek. We-"

"Bowser, you need to see this."

Kammy glared at the wand and turned to the king, pointing angrily at the small wooden stick. "He interrupted me!"

Bowser gave Kammy an amused look. "And your point? Kamek, where are you?"

Kammy could almost hear the pride in defeating his better in Kamek's voice. "Hanger CC53, sire. Near the bathrooms on the left."

Bowser stood up and walked towards the door, his tail swinging from left to right. "Come on, Kammy. Let's go see what he wants."

Disappointed, Kammy flicked her wand again and shut off the connection between hers and Kamek's. Hurriedly, she followed the giant king's shape down the hallway and through the tomato-stained passageway to the CC53 hanger.

Bowser met up with Kamek, rubbing his glasses on his robe in excitement. "What is it?" Kamek pointed further down the hall towards the hanger. Bowser and Kammy followed him as the light grew stronger and Bowser could hear the tick-tick-ticking of a cooling clown-car engine.

The koopaking stepped up to the top of the garage's stairs and peered around. Looking down to the floor, he saw all eight of his children, huddling around something to hide it. He glared down at them. "What did you do?" Bowser smacked his claw around and smothered Kamek's mouth when he opened it to answer. Through snarling teeth, Bowser repeated his question. "What…did…you…_do?_"

Bowser saw his son Iggy, situated in the center of the group, wring his claws and stare at his feet. Staring up at his father, Iggy spoke. "Sir…?"

Bowser glowered and squeezed his eyes shut. He knew when Iggy started with 'sir', it was something bad. He snapped his eyes back open and glared at his koopalings. "_Well?_"

The koopalings looked at each other and exchanged expressions. As if on cue, they all stepped away from the shape and Bowser saw it- situated behind them all, sleeping as if under a spell- was his beautiful Princess Peach.

A stunned silence followed and Kamek opened his mouth to say something again. As Bowser was too stunned to do it, Kammy took the liberty of covering his mouth again.

Bowser blinked. "What did you…do?"

Junior piped up. "We took Mama Peach for you, Daddy."

Bowser stared down at Peach, flanked by the koopalings. The koopalings looked nervously around as they wondered what their father's reaction would be. Peach was so calm, so sweet, even from so far and so unconscious, Bowser could see in her the beauty of body and beauty of soul he loved her for. _Its been so long…so long since I've seen her in person…_Staring for almost a minute, a light tap from Kammy lifted him from the trance-like gaze.

"Um, your mightiness?"

Bowser answered without turning around. "Get the princess the nicest of guest rooms we have. I want to talk to my children."

"Yes, sire." With a bow, Kammy rushed away to find a few koopa-troopas to help her.

Bowser stared down at his koopalings. "All of you- interview room 17. Now." The king swished around and headed towards the hallway again, the chosen room just a few hallways down.

xxxx0o0o0o0o0o0o0xxxx

In the Mario Brother's Headquarters, Mario and Luigi were almost done packing their plumbing equipment. Luigi picked up a strange-looking tool that reminded him of a wrench with a bad hair-day. He picked it up and showed his older brother. "What-a 'bout this?"

Mario stared at it. "What-a is it?"

Luigi shrugged and put it in their tool case anyway. "I was-a hoping you'da know." He looked for more tools and, seeing nothing, shut his case tightly. Mario followed suit and the two placed the cases in the back of a rented truck.

The Mario Bros. Plumbing Company usually traveled by pipe, but because the convention was solely for plumbers everywhere, going by pipe would actually by _more_ cumbersome and slow-moving than driving. After all, it was only an hour drive from Toad Town city limits anyway.

They hopped in the truck and chugged off, Luigi trying to find a decent radio station. Unfortunately, nothing caught their ears. Luigi turned it off to hold his own conversation.

"Didn't you-a have plans with Peach before we-a heard about this?"

Mario was impressed. "Si. How did you remember?"

Luigi shrugged. "Daisy said she was-a very excited. What's she gonna be-a doing instead?"

Mario stared at Luigi. "Daisy?"

Luigi rolled his eyes. "No, Peach."

Mario shrugged. "I don't-a know. We're going to-a Grand Canal next week, though."

"But Peach shouldn't-a have any plans for _this-a _week, so what's she gonna do instead?"

Mario shrugged again. "I dunno. Probably whatever she'd-a do next week. Or make-a cakes. She makes really-a good cake, y'know?"

"Daisy said-a Peach was-a really excited. She-a was thinking this would-a be the best week she'd have for-a long time."

Mario frowned slightly. He dug into their cooler and grabbed a ham sandwich. He bit into it and felt Luigi's eyes on him. Through the sandwich, he said. "Maybe she'll-a bake a _lot-a_ cakes."

Luigi looked back at the empty road. "_Muma Mia_. I don't think-a cakes will help this-a, Mario."

"Help what-a?"

Luigi sighed. "Daisy said…Daisy said Peach was worried about you and your love. For her." His love for Daisy was so strong; it went far beyond simply saving her. But sometimes, it seemed that the only reason Mario and Peach had interest in each other was because Mario was her never-failing savior. Luigi decided Mario just wasn't a romantic.

Mario glanced at Luigi. "Why would-a she do that? She's like-a my best friend. We're as close as-a ever." Luigi glanced at Mario, trying to get mustard out of his mustache and apparently not at all affected by their conversation. Luigi hoped with all his heart Mario just wasn't a romantic.

xxxx0o0o0o0o0o0o0xxxx

As he walked to the interview room, Bowser thought about what had happened. He had come into the hanger and found his koopalings, his Princess, her luggage, and knew nothing else. Cracking his knuckles and growling to himself, Bowser promised himself he'd find out the rest. _Those koopalings…they're going to be the death of me, I just know it._

He passed a stone embedded in the wall that was a great deal dirtier than the ones around it. Glaring at it, Bowser was about to decide to fire whoever was janitor of the hallway when he remembered- that was Peach's stone. During one of her 'visits', they were still re-stoning the very hallway he was in, and she had tripped over it and cut herself. Bowser had decreed that it continued to be used in the wall; in fear keeping the stone would look obsessive and absurd. Instead, he ordered the stone simply not be cleaned.

Bowser grinned at his own genius ways of keeping 'her presence' there. Completely normal, of course. Not at all the actions of a stalker. Flicking his head in pride, he continued the walk.

Bowser wished there were other ways of keeping 'her presence' there. Feeling her flesh, touching her hair, seeing her face, peering into her eyes, everything kept him at a balance. After the initial buzz and shock that he always got from her, that is. The feeling was one he longed for. One he had never felt anywhere but with her. She was sweet, kind, powerful, wise, young, and beautiful. He couldn't forget beautiful. Bowser chortled. Ask a koopa anywhere but the Darklands and possibly the Mushroom Kingdom, and they would call humans ugly. Bowser agreed, most were. But Peach…she was an exception.

More than he could say, Bowser had dreamed of the day he would rule side-by-side with the Princess. By day and the public eye, she would use her brilliance and benevolence to help control the lands. Bowser would show her what power, discipline, intimidation, and all his other strengths could do for a kingdom. By night and in private, she would show him her sweetness, her laughter, he smiles, her touch, her beauty…everything he always thought was too good to be possible until she reminded him-it was real. It was real because of her.

Oh, how Bowser needed her. He felt like he was missing a part of himself when she was far. _They call me obsessed! They just don't understand…if they understood, then…then they'd understand._ Bowser glowered as he continued down the hallway, kicking stones and shouting at anyone who passed him.

This was going to be terrible. If she was here, in his palace, where he could see her everyday but not get near her, it would be far worse than the time he spent wishing she was there. She would be miserable, he would be miserable. She wouldn't be easily pleased, he wouldn't ever be pleased. When she was here, he was happy, but she wasn't. And when she wasn't happy, neither was he. But when she left…he was worse. His days were empty, her pictures were dull, life was cruel and Peach was far.

_They shouldn't have brought her here. We'll all be miserable._ Bowser stared at the ceiling. _There's nothing to distract me now. We're not taking anything over, no one's chasing after her- as far as I know. It'll just be her…taunting me. And nothing I can do about it._ Bowser pulled his eyes to the wall, glancing upon a window, one of the few in the palace. He was almost at the interview room. Staring out, he saw a bird perched in a tree, staring back. Free. Happy. Nothing keeping it prisoner. Not like Peach, Peach kept him prisoner every day of his life that he could see her face. _Koopalings, what were you thinking?_

The interview room was a large, oval room with a bunch of chairs set up almost like a conference room. Lemmy swung his stout legs under his chair, waiting, like all his siblings, for whatever fate their father had prepared for them. He felt Larry's eyes on him and looked up at his brother. Larry was obviously more concerned than Lemmy. He whispered harshly, "What do you think Daddy's gonna do?"

Morton, seated behind them, leaned between the two and growled, "pound us. Like I can pound you to a pulp and you'll be a squished up little pulp. Except Dad would pound you better."

Roy looked over at the nearby three over his sunglasses. Poking Morton on his birthmark, he said, "Larryboy wants to know what Pops'll say, Morty. We know 'e could pound us already, wichout yoh' help."

The door of the interview room slammed open as Bowser stormed in. He stared at the eight koopalings seated in the chairs and growled, "What are you all doing here? I only wanted one of you here."

The koopalings looked around at each other. Iggy raised a claw. "Er, dad? You asked for all of us."

Bowser frowned. "I think I know what I said, Iggy. I was the one that said it. _I was the one that said it, and I'm right!_"

Bowser Junior looked on the brink of tears. "…Dad?"

Bowser rolled his eyes at his youngest son. "WHAT?"

"Are you mad at us?"

Bowser almost laughed at the question, but he was too furious. Embers flew out of his mouth as he bellowed, "YES, JUNIOR, I AM!" He paced around the room, his steps echoing against the stone walls. Slamming his claws down on the table, he glared at his koopalings. "_What were you thinking?_" Larry shakily raised a claw. "What, Larry?" Bowser grunted.

Larry gulped. "Well see…we wanted to get you a good present…and we know you like Mama Peach and we wanted her here for your birthday."

Bowser growled in anger, ignoring the gracious gesture. "Do you realize everything that could have gone wrong?"

Iggy furrowed his brow and thrust his claw into the air. Not waiting to be called on, he spoke out. "Dad, we took every precaution. We spent hours making sure nothing could go wrong. Peach is here. She came to us on her way to a private vacation."

Bowser glared at his son. "She'll be missed!"

Lemmy spoke up. "No, dad. She left with the kingdom thinking she was with Mario. Then she called the castle AND Mario to say she was leaving, by herself, for a private vacation."

Bowser growled- a sign he still didn't approve, but couldn't think of a reason not to. For the first time since her arrival in the room, Wendy stopped filing her claws and said to her dad, "He's right. I was in the car and heard her. No one knows where she is, but, like, they all think it's a vacation."

Bowser looked at his children without snarling. Almost curiously, he asked, "Does she have any way of contacting them?" All the koopalings shook their heads 'no'.

Bowser brightened. It was a fool-proof plan, his koopalings had come up with a fool-proof plan! Even Kammy wouldn't have been able to do that. _Fool-proof…_But then again…Just because no one else knew she was kidnapped didn't mean _she_ wouldn't.

He turned to face the wall, his spiked shell facing the koopalings. "You know she'll be miserable," Bowser grumbled.

Bowser Junior laughed, tears drying on his warm skin. "Just make it so she's not, daddy."

Iggy grinned. "Yeah. She's supposed to be on vacation. Make it like she is."

Bowser turned to his koopalings. "You know…I could try that."

Bowser started out the door with a quicker pace. There were so many things he had to do! Before leaving, he stuck his head back in. With an almost accusing claw, he growled, "The whole fool-proof plan thing? My idea."

The door started to close when Bowser stuck his head in again. "Only the fool-proof part. The whole stupid idea of kidnapping is your idea still, but I made it fool-proof. Got it? Good."

The koopalings watched the door clatter shut as they were left in the interview room alone. Larry spoke in surprise. "That was _it_?"

Lemmy shook his head with a bit of a smile. "No. That's not _it_. We've got a lot more to do…"

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**Author's Note:** Like I said, you guys are seriuosly kick-awesome reviewers. Thanks for the humongous responce from last chapter, I was really flattered. Nice to come home to after a vacation. :) I'll be thrilled if this gets a responce anything like that.

Oh, and next chapter's really fun, quite light-hearted compared to this one and even has a bit with Daisy's POV. So review so I can update it soon :P


	8. Not What was Expected

**Foreword:** Sorry I haven't updated lately, especially compariably with the last update. I've been without internet time after time...and discovering new fanfics and fandoms I enjoy. But don't worry, I really like this story, so I'm sticking to it. :)

I like this one pretty much. I had fun writing it and making the characters for this. I hope that shows. :) And I hope you all like it too!

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Peach's head was ringing so loudly, so fiercely, she swore the bells of St. Toad's were bursting out of them. She Mumbled and massaged her head as the ringing died down, finally easing her eyes open, the black she had encountered for who knows how long fading away. When her eyes were finally opened she saw, directly on top of her chest, the most unwelcome sight of a small blue spider on her chest, grinning through a few missing or golden teeth.

Shrieking, Peach backed up against the headboard of the bed she was lain on. She waved a flimsy hand at the spider and it looked at her with a look she could have sworn was one of hurt feelings and skittered off her to the bed-stand by her. "Esscuse me, mees," the spider spoke, "boot you're not even s'posed to be awek yet."

Peach looked at the talking spider with confusion. "What…what do you mean?"

"Ah meen, ze folk in charge of tellin' me where to gu said I's put ze film on table and leave an' you bees slepen still. But you're awek!" The spider furrowed his brow. "Well I s'pose I wasn't s'posed to tek en hour lunch break till _afta_ givin' you ze film. An' I s'pose I shoulda left right afta given eet, not stayed 'round te watch'u. Zat might be why's you're awek."

The spider nodded decisively and turned to scurry down the bedside table. Peach stopped him. "Wait! What film?" The spider looked at the princess in surprise.

"Ze one zat says 'When you're awek, watch me', o'course! Zat I put on ze table." The spider glanced around the table, black wood with nothing but himself and the princess's hand on it. He felt his blue face turn pink. "I s'pose I didn't bring it, deed I? I go get eet."

Peach laughed a little as the tiny spider rushed out the room. As her eyes followed him, it hit her- she wasn't anywhere she was supposed to be. "Where…am I?" she said to herself. The bed she was on was covered in red satin sheets, the stone headboard carved with the royal crest of Bowser's face. Peach gasped. _No…no, it can't be…_She looked around the room more. The room was in shades of black and red, surprisingly more comforting than eerie shades of them. The curtains were drawn, and closed formed the royal symbol yet again. The door the spider had rushed out of also had the symbol and there was no mistaking whose castle would have ceiling lights rimmed with spikes.

She was under the claw of Bowser again.

A great lump formed in her throat and she felt herself growing weak. _Oh no, not now, please, great stars, not now!_ She fell back and grabbed one of the memory-foam pillows scattered on the bed, pressing it into her face. _I'm dreaming, I'm dreaming, I'm dreaming…any minute now I'll wake up and be at the airport for my vacation…_Peach knew wishing was pointless. She was captured and at the whim of a great, stupid, koopa and apparently, a talking blue spider.

The door creaked open and Peach looked up from the pillow, her face indent quickly fading. The spider was carrying a movie case slightly bigger than himself with two of his legs. He wobbled several feet to the sides under the weight and missing security of two of his legs. Ignoring the pain her heart felt at being kidnapped, Peach's instincts kicked into gear and she climbed off the bed and lifted the film from the spider. He flashed her his grin, with missing and golden teeth, and said, "Thank ya kindly, mees. A'll show you how te put ze film on." The spider scurried up the bed and pressed a few buttons on the TV and told Peach to place the 'film', as he kept calling it, in the DVD slot. She did and the screen buzzed to life. Staring out at her from the television and confirming her fears was King Bowser.

Bowser's image looked disgruntled until a hushed voice from off-screen was heard to say "Go, go, go!" Bowser glared in the direction the sound had come from in the recording and mumbled, "now?" The off-screen voice seethed a yes and Bowser snapped back to face the camera.

"If you're watching this, you're awake. Right? Yeah. So good morning. You probably noticed you're not at the airport by now. So where are you? I'm going to tell you. Please stay calm, I don't like it when people scream. And it's not my fault. It's really not! So…yeah. Keep calm. Anyway. It will probably surprise you, but you're in my castle. Bowser's castle."

Peach rolled her eyes at the recording. Sarcastically, she seethed, "Thanks for telling me, the narration and room décor gave me no clue at all."

The little blue spider looked up at the Princess. "Who ya talkin' te?" Peach quickly felt foolish and almost disrespectful. Once the king's face had appeared, she had forgotten her fear- it seemed safer with Bowser present, Mario would come, she would leave, life would return to normal. She stared back at the television. Surprisingly, she hadn't missed anything. Apparently Bowser had _expected_ her to have a reaction- just probably not one of sarcasm.

"Yeah, like I said, in my castle. But this time it really is my castle. So no plumber's gonna come blow it up, cause no one's gonna rescue you. You don't need to be rescued, right? Yeah, you're on vacation, no one rescues people from vacations. Yeah…Except Junior, but that was different…" Bowser cleared his throat nervously. Peach blinked. _Nervously?_ What was he nervous for? "Anyway. My kids were the ones that got you without my permission. They thought they were clever, they were clever but I didn't want them to get you, you got that? I didn't want them to kidnap you, because…that would be bad. Yeah. My castles get blown up when you get kidnapped, which is why no plumbers coming, because I don't want my palace blown up and all…"

Peach couldn't keep herself from giggling. He rambled like a toddler making almost no sense, nervous for reasons Peach was yet to figure out. He continued, looking quite annoyed at himself. He, apparently, realized he was rambling as well.

"ANYWAY!" A tiny flame flew out of his mouth and onto the notes Bowser had been holding and crinkling in his strange anxiety, igniting them on the corner. Bowser seemed to just get angrier at this development, attempting to blow the tiny flicker out and only igniting the notes more. In anger, he shook the papers and crunched them into a ball. Peach could hear the cameraman chortling under his breath, and apparently the Koopa King could as well. "What're you laughing at?" Bowser snarled, throwing the charred paper at his head. He stared at the camera and continued, his voice almost seething.

"Here's what it's down to, Princess. You're here. Not my fault. You're staying here. No one's coming to get you. They think you're on vacation, that's where you are. You're gonna be happy, I'm gonna be happy, it'll all be just peachy." Bowser stopped his speech and Peach saw a smile forming on the corner of his lips. Bowser grabbed the seat's back and peered over it to off-screen. "Did you here that, Kammy? Peachy? Funny, huh? Cause her name's peach, and I said Peachy…"

"Yes, your majesty, it was very funny. Keep going with the speech."

Bowser frowned. "You just don't appreciate good humor." He turned back to the camera. "Where was I? Oh yeah…my kids said you're due for return on Saturday or whatever. We'll take you there. I promise. And Kings don't break their promises."

The recording shut off and the spider grinned at Peach. "Now I get ze maid." He skittered off the bed and out the door. Peach watched him leave and frowned, letting everything Bowser said sink in. How stupid she had been to leave! She knew she'd be in trouble, what a lecture she'd be getting from Toadsworth…Toadsworth!

Peach's luggage hadn't arrived yet, but her purse sat nearby. She grabbed it and dug for her cell-phone. A tongue-lashing from Toadsworth and a saving from Mario would be better than anything she expected to get by staying at Bowser's Palace. She grabbed her cell-phone and turned it on, noting a few missed messages. She ignored them and pressed speed-dial for the castle back home and pressed the phone up to her ear.

There wasn't even ringing. A few dissonant notes toned in Peach's ear and an operator came on-line, even that message fuzzy. "The…cay-tion you are….ttemptin…ake a call fro…no reception…cannot be may…please try agai…nother loca-" The message crackled and finally died. Angrily, Peach glared at the phone, flashing messages she didn't care to read. Peach clenched her eyes closed as she filled in the gaps fuzzy reception had covered.

Peach opened her eyes and threw the useless phone to the floor. She rifled through her purse, feeling for her GPS. They would come…they would come. It would be normal, life would be fine again. But her search was to no avail…the GPS was gone. Tears filled Peach's eyes. _Oh stars, what have I done? I put myself up to this…_

Peach grabbed the phone again and, with a wavering finger, pressed "ok" to clear the message informing her calls could not be made or received. But it wasn't "ok", it wasn't "ok" with her at all…but she desperately needed to see her background. Her background was a familiar image- herself and Mario in front of the castle. How foolish she had been, to want away from that. She had left her home to get some peace and deserved what she got. There was nothing she could do and nothing Mario, or anyone for that matter, would or could do. She wiped tears out of her eyes and thrust the phone to the side again.

Her door cracked open and a koopa, donned in maid attire and rolling in her luggage in shifts, came in the room. Peach watched her wheel it all in and smile. "You can help me put this stuff away in a bit. Don't want you livin' out of a suitcase, now do we?" She brushed a bit of dust off one of the suitcases and smiled again. "I'm supposed to get you whatever you'd like while you settle in, courtesy of His Majesty."

Peach avoided the kind maid's eyes. "Whatever I'd like? I'd like to go home, thank you very much."

The maid walked over and sat on the bed next to the princess. Silently, Peach marveled at the unorthodox action. She might like this maid. "That's not very courteous, you just got here," the maid told her.

"It doesn't matter, I'm already sick of it."

"You haven't even left your room yet!"

Peach inspected her hands, trying to hide the guilt. The maid's next words pinned her home so hard, it made her cringe.

"The only reason you're upset is because you're under Bowser's control. If it was anyone else, even Grodus, you wouldn't be so horrified. You know Bowser does his best to make you happy and it's that very reason you make yourself unhappy whenever he's involved in whatever he may be involved with. Selective hate isn't a very admirable trait in a princess, or anyone for that matter."

Peach wasn't sure she liked the maid so much now.

After a pause, the maid spoke again. "So you're here for vacation?"

"Not _here_ for vacation, no."

"But you left your castle to go on a vacation, right?"

"Yeah."

"Where were you gonna go?"

Peach faced the maid. "Look, if you're trying to do small-talk, I'm not in the mood."

The maid just repeated her question.

"I don't know. Somewhere warm."

"It's warm here."

Peach blinked slowly. "Sure, but being captured by a psychotic lizard wasn't exactly what I was thinking."

The maid stared down the Princess. "He's not psychotic."

"What did you say?"

"I said, King Bowser isn't crazy. He's brilliant. What's wrong with that?"

"What's _not_ wrong with that?"

The maid glared at Peach with a look like an upset mother defending her child from another's mockery. "I don't want to argue with you about how your selective hate clouds your vision, okay? Anyway," the maid said, "what were you looking for in your vacation?"

Peach bit back cruel remarks she assumed the maid wouldn't appreciate. She paused and thought about an answer. "Peace. Everywhere I go I'm flanked by guards and attendants. 'Miss Peach, don't do that!' 'Miss Peach, don't touch that!' 'Miss Peach, you are forbidden to have _any_ fun!' I wanted to go somewhere where nobody cared about me so much I couldn't do anything.

The maid gave a crooked smile. "Then I suppose this place might not be so good for you. We're all crazy about Princess Peach."

Peach pointed a finger at the maid. "You mean _Bowser_'s crazy about Princess Peach."

The maid laughed. "Well, yeah, but we still respect you a whole lot more than we do most world leaders, whether or not you respect us back. And yes, that's partially due to all the things we hear about you from His Majesty. But it's that respect that will keep us from pestering you. Unless, of course, His Majesty wants us to. Then it's a completely different matter."

The maid started to laugh, but ended with a cough when she saw Peach didn't find humor in it. The maid looked at Peach. Softly, she said, "We all want you to enjoy yourself. King Bowser more than anybody. He may not be upset you're here, but it certainly wasn't his fault you're here and he wants you to be happy. So, on his behalf; is there anything you'd like to make yourself feel more comfortable?"

Peach blinked. She sighed. The most she could do is try to be happy- the words the maid said about "selective hate" had stung her- it had always been her goal to be an example of fairness and compassion and strived to make sure no one was treated unfairly because of who they were on the outside or what they'd done in the past. Why had Bowser always been an exception?

"I'd like a glass of plain water, please."

"What kind?"

Peach was used to this question, her castle had more flavors of unflavored water than she could count. "Do you have Himayoshin Stream?"

The maid inhaled between clenched teeth. "Yeah, but it's imported so it's a little stale. May I suggest Black Pool? Very crisp this time of year."

"Sure." The maid nodded and started to leave. "Wait, what's your name?"

The maid smiled. She hadn't been asked that by a visitor for a long, long time. "Valkoopy." She started to leave again, but was stopped.

"Valkoopy?" The maid turned to face the princess. "Thanks. Thanks a lot."

As Valkoopy closed the door behind her, she knew Peach meant that about more than the water.

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Morton Jr. was upset. Since he had left the interview room earlier in the day, he had been complimented twice, he had been offered ice-cream willingly, no one was crying or screaming at him, and he had a delicious sandwich just a while ago with nothing to complain about. It was a horrid day so far.

He grumbled past a hallway, his father's face dozens times over staring at him from the stone walls. He hadn't gotten any homework for the weekend, but that meant he couldn't complain about it either. He stared at an ant scurrying over the stone floor. Morton smiled and looked around the hallway. To his disappointment, he didn't see anyone walking past.

Angry at a missed chance to show his prowess, he picked up a loose rock and chucked in the direction of the tiny ant, the rock shattering and a bit landing on the insect. Morton gasped. After checking to be sure no one could see him, he rushed over and picked the ant up. "Hey, Ant-face," he snarled, poking the ant and trying to make sure it hadn't been crushed. "Bug-eyed buggy butt, move your buggy butt...Please?" He poked the ant again and it started darting around his claw. Morton smiled and lowered his claw closer to the ground.

As he was doing so, a door creaked open and a maid stepped into the hall. She glanced at the koopaling setting the ant free. Morton was petrified. Had she seen him? Quickly, he dumped the ant on the ground, stood up, and ground his footclaw as hard as he could on top of the insect he had tried so hard to keep alive.

The maid paid no regard either way, as if she hadn't even seen the young koopaling. Morton snarled and almost starting shouting insults at her for not seeing him crush the ant when he heard his name being called.

He turned around to see Lemmy running over to him. "Morton, Morton," he called again. Lemmy panted as he approached his brother and showed something to him.

Lemmy was holding a wooden replica of their father. It had a strip of wood on its shell that could be lifted to make its jaw drop to expose metal innards. The wooden replica was taller than but not as wide as their father, yet still unmistakable.

"What is it, Morton?"

Morton peered at the statue. "It's a nutcracker, stupid-head."

Lemmy turned the nutcracker around and looked at it with his good eye. "What does it do?"

"What do you think, clownboy? Cracks nuts."

Lemmy's mouth formed an 'o'. "That makes sense." He fiddled with some spikes on the nutcracker. "But Morton, what does this do?"

"What does what do, stupid?" Morton leaned over to see what Lemmy was pointing at curiously. Lemmy pushed one of the spikes in and the nutcracker being to make clicking and hissing noises. "Lemme see it."

He grabbed the nutcracker out of Lemmy's hands and inspected it from head to toe. As he was peering at the mouth, Lemmy decided to lift the wooden flap on the shell and see what would happen.

As the Bowser Nutcracker opened its mouth, they realized what the clicking was. A flame shot out of Bowser's mouth and scorched Morton's face. Morton roared in pain and swiped the nutcracker out of Lemmy's hand, causing it to fall on his own foot.

Now using some of his elementary insults in pain, Morton kicked the nutcracker off his foot and lunged at Lemmy. He swung his clenched fists and his brother's face, his eyes scrunched close in pain.

He missed horribly the first try, the second swing brushing through Lemmy's Mohawk, and the third landing squarely on his jaw. Aggravated at the attack, Lemmy kicked his brother's shin.

The two scuffled harder, Morton finally grabbing the nutcracker and beating his brother over the head with it. It was then that Kammy walked into the hallway.

"What under Star Haven is going on here?" she bellowed, firing sparks into the air from her wand.

The two brothers quit fighting and Lemmy quickly thrusted a finger in Morton's direction, while Morton pointed the now splintered nutcracker at Lemmy in retaliation.

Kammy's eyes went wide. "Is that your father's nutroaster?" She raced over and yanked the broken nutcracker out of Morton's claw. She ran her hand over it in sadness before glaring at the boys. While shaking the nutcracker at them, she shouted, "You two are going to be in so much trouble!"

Lemmy gasped. "He started it! He kicked me!"

Morton snarled. "Only because Lemmy burnt me!"

Lemmy faced his brother. "You shouldn't have stuck your face in the fire!"

Morton spat in anger, "You think I _meant_ to do that, stupid-face? I bet you burnt me on purpose, stupid-face!"

Kammy fired more sparks. "Boys! Shut up already! If your father was here, he'd-"

"I'd what?" Bowser stepped into the hallway with perfect timing. He glanced casually at his boys, one spitting blood with a blackened eye, the other with scraped knees and a burnt face. "I'd what, Kammy?"

Kammy looked petrified at the king's sudden presence. Quickly she calmed. "Sire, your sons ruined your nutroaster and beat each other up!"

Bowser looked a bit confused. "Why'd they do that?"

Morton snarled, "He burnt me."

"It was an accident!" Lemmy burst into tears. "It was an accident, Daddy!"

Bowser frowned at Lemmy. "Don't cry. It's stupid."

Kammy looked at her king. "Aren't you going to punish them, sire?"

Bowser looked at her. "Looks to me like they already punished each other. And I never liked that nutcracker anyway."

Kammy looked hurt. "Sire…I gave that to you for Christmas one year!"

"So?" Bowser faced his boys again. "Hey Lemmy, did Morton say you burnt him?" Through tears, Lemmy nodded. "With fire?"

Lemmy nodded again. "With the nutcracker-thing.

Bowser frowned. "Not your breath?" Lemmy was slightly behind his siblings in producing a decent flame.

Lemmy shook his head. "That would be mean."

"So?" Bowser growled. "At least you fought like a good koopa the rest of the time. Go to the nurse." Kammy turned to escort them, but Bowser stopped her. "Hey Hag, let them go themselves."

Kammy spun on her heels. Hotly, she said, "Excuse me, your evilness, but how do you know they'll even go to the nurse? They might go hide or have another fight, sire."

Bowser snarled, "Because that would be stupid. They're not that stupid." The king stopped himself. "Actually, you're right. You'd better go with." Bowser watched the three leave, Kammy lecturing the boys and telling them what she would do if punishment was up to _her_. Bowser shook his head and turned to keep on his path.

As he walked, he noticed a splatter of ant-guts on the ground. He blinked at it and peered down both directions of the deserted hallway. Seeing no-one, the mighty Koopa King bent down and covered the dead bug with some of the dust around. He then continued on his way.

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Daisy was sitting on her fluffy queen-sized bed draped in yellow cloth. She was dressed in nothing but a nightgown and clutching a cream yellow pillow, watching her favorite horror film, _Boo_. She leaned over the pillow, the laced edges tickling her dropped jaw. To her horror, just as the movie went silent to add dramatic effect, her phone rang.

Daisy screamed and threw her pillow at the television, watching it quiver from the effect. While the pillow flew through the air, a white blur flashed on the screen. Being already startled, the Boo didn't scare her at all. She sighed and rolled her eyes at herself, grabbing the remote and paused the movie. The phone rang for a second time. _Why is it that I can go through being captured by maniacs, see my kingdom and my cousin's uprooted and terrorized, and hear about my boyfriend's certain death without flinching, but I my phone can't ring during _Boo_ without me jumping out of my skin?_

Daisy composed herself and grabbed the telephone, speaking as regally as she could. "Sarrassa Land Castle, Princess Daisy speaking."

She recognized Toadsworth's panicked and yet stern voice on the other end instantly. "Miss Daisy? Is there something you need to tell me about Princess Peach?"

Daisy wracked her brain. "Umm, not that I can think of, Toadsy. What do you mean?"

"I think you know perfectly well what I mean, wot!"

Daisy sighed. "Ya know, I actually don't. Would you mind telling me what this is about? Channing Toadum's character is about to get eaten by the King Boo, so keep it choppy."

"Don't try and be smart with me, lady! This is serious! And of course you know what I'm talking about, why else would Princess Peach tell me to tell you that she did what I know she's told you before, eh?"

Daisy blinked impatiently. She spoke slowly, as if it would help Toadsworth realize what was going on faster or something. "Look. I don't know what's going on. And you're hurting my head. Can't I just talk to Peach?"

Toadsworth practically exploded. "Talk to her? _Talk to her?_ Are you blinkin' serious, m'lady? Peach is gone, you should blinkin' well know that! And I expect you to tell me where, Daisy!"

Daisy laughed. "Are you for serious? You don't remember? She's at Grand Canal with Mario, do-do."

Toadsworth was silent momentarily. For the few seconds of peace she had, Daisy wondered if her phone had gone dead. Then he spoke, his voice scratchy and quiet. "You…don't know what she did?"

Daisy almost felt nervous. She glanced suspiciously at the television, a soul-snatching Boo staring back at her, frozen in pause. "No, Toadsy, I don't."

"Well she…you see…oh, I'll just play the voice-mail for you."

Daisy listened in surprise at the recording Toadsworth played. Her face grew brighter and brighter as it continued.

"Well?"

Daisy spoke in an awed almost-whisper, not completely realizing she was still on the phone. "She did it…she finally _did it_."

"I say, did what?"

"Got away…away from everyone else, away from herself, away _to_ herself."

"Now what balderdash are you talking about? Away from herself to herself? What on earth is all that gibberish? _Where is Princess Peach, Daisy?_"

Daisy laid her back on the bed and grabbed a handful of popcorn, stuffing the salty treat into her mouth before answering. "See, she's always felt contained, like she couldn't be herself for fear of being 'protected'. In reality, all the 'protecting' you and your buddies were doing was just trapping her. She wanted to be free, and she got her chance. Leave her alone, she knows what she's doing."

"So you're not upset? She could be on the brink of death! You're not going to help us find her and bring her home before she's kidnapped or worse? "

Daisy grinned. "Nope!" She promptly hung up the phone and switched the television back on.

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**Author's note: **Have I told you lately how much I love reviews? Each and every review is wonderful, especially since the ones I recieve from you amazing people are just...really good. :)

I -just- finished chapter 9, unfortunately no fluff yet. I swear, its coming soon! By 10, I promise there will be fluffy moments. But there are koopalings next chapter, so...yeah. Review if you want it! By the way, I'm reaching the fun part of the story. Yet, school is approaching fast. So its going to be a nice, delicate balance of me wanting to write and not having time. Just...forwarning you. :)


	9. Dinner Plans and Pains

**Foreword:** Let me start of by saying I am sooooo unbelievably sorry for taking so long. I got a great reaction last chapter and was all rip-roaring to update and a horrid chain of events stopped me. First, I lost half my chapter due to computer failure. Next, I lost total and complete access to It was...not a happy time for me. I've gotten back and I'm updating this even though I'd really like to skim through it one more time...I hope it comes to your likings anyway. This chapter has a lot of drama in it too, so...yeah.

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The VolcanoPalace's main kitchen door swung open and Bowser stormed in. He grabbed a barstool and sat next to an empty counter-space. The kitchen staff glanced nervously at one another; Bowser only ever came in when he was having a horrible day and wanted instant gratification.

One blue-shelled cook pushed his trainee past a curtain of meat awaiting cooking and harshly whispered to him to go see Bowser.

Horrified, the trainee spun around and begged to his trainer to spare him. The trainer just shook his head. Sighing, the trainee decided that confronting the upset king was good training. His knees wobbled as he stepped up, glancing at the cooks watching him. A few tapped their feet in impatience, a couple more shooing him on with waving hands. The trainee gulped and squeaked, "Can I help you, Sire?" He cringed at his breaking voice.

Bowser looked up and glared at the trainee. "Why'd'ya think I came in here, to bake cupcakes? You'd better be able to help me."

The trainee shuddered in fear. "With…with what, su-su-sire?" Bowser mumbled something in reply. "Excuse me, what…what did you say?"

Bowser stood quickly, knocking the barstool to the ground, breaking it into splinters. "I SAID, I WANT DINNER!"

The trainee shook in fear. He gulped yet again and spoke with a quavering voice. "Nnnnow, sire? It's only 2 o'clock….but if if if you want dinner we can certainly-"

Bowser snarled, "Not now, droolface. Later. For me and Peach."

A chain of "oh"s ran through the kitchen staff and the head chef stepped up, now that he had realized his life wasn't in danger by a grumpy koopa king. "Vat vould you like us to serve, my liege?"

Bowser grabbed a second stool, sat down, and grunted. "Something romantic and tasty. Not too much meat, I don't think Peach would like that. And something fancy for dessert."

"Any requests, my liege?"

Bowser grunted. "No. Just make it at 7:30 and have the Dining Hall all pretty-looking."

"Zat is all your requests, my liege?"

Bowser thought for a moment. "Have some music too so we can dance. And serve steak." The king stood up and promptly left. A chain of "Good bye" followed as the kitchen doors swung shut. Bowser walked a bit farther and stopped. He took a deep breathe. Now came the hard part.

xxxx0o0o0o0o0o0o0xxxx

Iggy was walking through the halls, trying to find a quiet spot to read "The Etymology of _Lava_ and other things Nobody Thinks About". Instead, he found Larry and Lemmy, faces pressed against the wall.

He pushed his glasses up farther on his face and stared at his brothers. "What are you two doing?"

Larry grinned. "I found a secret spy-hole!"

Lemmy nodded fiercely. "It's secret 'cause only Larry and me know 'bout it!"

Iggy seemed slightly interested. "Well, it's not secret anymore- you're telling me all about it."

Larry waved his older brother over. "Wanna come see it?"

Iggy was glad it was Larry and Lemmy who had found the hole. Although besides himself they were the only ones that would be interested in it, he still didn't feel like being laughed at by another brother for sticking his face up to a wall. "Sure I wanna see it."

Larry and Lemmy backed away from the wall and Iggy peered through the hole. It seemed to be a built-in periscope type thing. The reflections of the mirrors showed a perfect view of the floor directly below- By the looks of the scraped mortar and brick that covered the nearby floor, Larry hadn't simply seen the hole and looked down it.

"Larry, how did you know this was here?"

Larry shrugged while grinning, a sign it was something he was extremely proud about- so proud he wanted to try and look humble. "There was a map in the bottom of a box in the bottom of a drawer in the abandoned kitchen."

Iggy scrunched his eyebrows. "And what in Darkland were you doing there?"

Lemmy answered brightly, "My homework was to explore somewhere I've never been and count the spiders. And we hadn't been there before."

Iggy scoffed. "Why was that your homework?"

"We're studying habitats of spiders," Lemmy proudly reported.

Larry frowned. "We're not talking about spiders though. We're talking about this. What do you think it's for, Ig?"

Iggy racked his brain. "Well, probably for spying on the door. See how the view is perfectly situated on that door? Before they invented security cameras, they probably had to spy on exits and entrances with periscopes. Did the map have any other ones listed?"

Larry nodded. "I think it used to. But this one was the only one that wasn't eaten away."

Iggy looked through the periscope again. "I think that door is one of the guest bedrooms now. Actually, I think that's where Mama Pea-"

Iggy gasped. Lemmy stared at him. "What about Mama Peach?"

Iggy ignored Lemmy. "Guys, come here!" The brothers huddled around the periscope and saw quite an interesting view. Their father was approaching Peach's door quite nervously. As his knuckles rose to knock, they realized they had front-row seats to something they wouldn't be sorry they saw.

xxxx0o0o0o0o0o0o0xxxx

Peach had finished unpacking, with the help of Valkoopy. Her new friend had spent a good portion of the long time it took to put all her luggage away talking about how her 'trip' as she kept calling it, would only be fun if Peach let it be. The rest had been a much more comfortable discussion about things in Peach's life.

Now she was curled up on her bed, watching a soap-opera on TV, determined not to leave. As long as she didn't think about how blatantly she was disregarding Val's advice, she didn't feel guilty.

Peach's door knocked several times and a gruff voice called her name. Peach shut off the TV just as the koopa had begun making-out with a mind-controlled goomba. She didn't bother asking who it was and just stayed on her bed.

The knock repeated and Bowser's voice came through the door a bit more nervous.

Peach sighed and got up off her bed. She brushed her hand down her dress and stepped to the door, swinging it open to reveal Bowser, looking awkward with his huge bulk in the doorway. Peach lifted her head, smiled, and asked, "yes?" in proper princess form, trying to forget who she was addressing.

Bowser tried to look powerful and threatening. He tried to appear as the fear-striking king he normally was, trying to forget who he was addressing for a moment as well. "Peach, you're coming to dinner with me tonight."

Peach's princess act of courtesy dissolved. Her smile fell and she crossed her arms, glaring at Bowser. "Why would I want to do that?"

Bowser snarled, "Because _I_ want you to!"

"So that means I should want to?"

Bowser seemed almost baffled that someone would be arguing with him. "Well, yeah! 'Cause if you don't, I'll…I'll…"

"Look, Bowser. I don't want to have dinner with you. You kidnapped me, again! This week was supposed to be fun and relaxing, not a week stuck in a mountain with a freak."

Bowser snarled and glared at the Princess. He most certainly wasn't nervous anymore, what with her spitfire attitude igniting his stubbornness. "First of all, this isn't a mountain. It's a really big volcano! Second of all, I _didn't kidnap you_! Get that through your head, Princess! This isn't my fault; I just want you to be happy!" Bowser grabbed the doorknob and shut Peach in. Through the oak, he roared, "And I expect you in an evening gown at 7:30 by the Dining Hall!"

xxxx0o0o0o0o0o0o0xxxx

Iggy and his brothers were stunned. Lemmy was first to speak up. "That was _so cool!_"

Iggy slapped his brother over the head, causing Lemmy's lazy eye to jerk to the sides. "Are you insane, Lemmy? That wasn't cool! That wasn't cool at all!"

Lemmy frowned. "I thought it was. I mean, we were just standing here….and we saw something really important!"

Larry grinned. "Yeah, we were pretty good spies." He saw his older brother's glare and continued, "but that doesn't mean it was something I want to happen again."

Iggy looked over his two brothers. "Y'know, I just got an idea. Sibling council time, I think! Lemmy, you find Ludwig. Larry, you find Wendy and Morton Jr. I'll find Bowser Jr. and Roy. Meet back here." Lemmy was waving his claw fervently in the air. Iggy sighed. "Lemmy, we're not in school. What is it?"

"How come I only find one person?"

"Because you only have one eye to look with." Lemmy thought the answer over in his head and seemed satisfied.

The three split up and within a few minutes had managed finding all the siblings. Although VolcanoPalace was so huge, on a day like that one, there wasn't much to do or places that needed searching.

Iggy decided to start the meeting. "Okay guys, Lemmy, Larry, and I just witnessed something very important. Larry, would you like to describe what we saw?"

"Yeah."

There was silence. Wendy began filing her nails in impatience. Iggy sighed. "_Will you describe it then?_ Preferably before Wendy runs out of claw to file?"

Wendy's "hmph"ed her brother and admired her nails. Lemmy, blushing red, began to tell the siblings what he saw.

After he was done, Ludwig asked, "So, Father wants Peach to come to dinner with him, but she doesn't want to go because…why?"

"We don't know, Ludwig. But we know she needs a bit of…encouragement," Larry explained.

Roy leaned back against the wall. "I kin hep arrage dis."

Bowser Jr. laughed. "Roy, you sound like you're gonna kill somebody or something."

Morton grinned. "I can help arrange _that_!"

Ludwig cleared his throat. "Nobody's killing anybody," he began. Morton instantly began complaining. Ignoring him, Ludwig continued. "We just need to have someone…ONE of us, persuade her. Act as if it's imperative she go or something."

Iggy spun on his feet to face Ludwig. "It _is_! It's very important."

Ludwig frowned. "Perhaps, but she observably doesn't feel so. Whoever goes should make the act awfully dramatic so she will feel remorse for her words to Father and be willing to accept his invitation to dinner."

Bowser junior looked dead. "What are we doing?"

Wendy rolled her eyes. "Junior, were you even listening?"

Bowser junior looked very upset at the accusation. "Of course I was! But it's kind of hard to know what's going on when BlueHair is telling the plans in French!"

Morton stood up next to his brother. "Yeah! Freaky face BlueHair boy don't make sense cause he's a freak- freaky face BlueHair boy!"

Wendy clapped her hands to gather attention just before the other koopalings began quarreling. "Shut up, okay? Okay! Now, listen up. Ludwig's plan is like, really good. And it wasn't in French, duh. He was like, saying one of us should go tell Peach to have a date with dad so he, like, doesn't get mad and all. M'kay?"

"M…yeah." Bowser Junior answered, catching himself. "Can I go? Please?"

Morton noticed no one was disagreeing and snarled. "You can't go, dipstick! You're too stupid and…stuff! Dipstick!"

Roy stepped over to Morton and said, "What' you say?"

Morton stepped closer to Roy. "I said, he's stupid and a dipstick. Like you, Dippy McDipstick, mayor of …Dipstickville!"

Roy lifted an eyebrow and stared long and hard at his brother through his sunglasses. "Dat so, Warty Morty?"

"You lookin' for a fight, freak?" Morton growled.

"Whaddifiam?" Roy kept his cool, staring down his brother. Morton was trembling, trying his best to keep his voice and threats steady.

"Then I'll pound ya into…into…minced meat and the flies….yeah! I'll pound you!"

Roy's breath grew hot and stale, and Morton could see sparks lighting and flaring as he said, "Wanna bet?"

Morton felt the heat on his face. He tried to look fearsome. "If I fought you, you'd be so flat dead you'd die. So, uh, I'll just let the stupid dipstick go. He can be stupid and you'll be alive…and stuff." Morton stepped back and pushed his claw hard onto Roy's forhead. "But you're luck you're not pounded! Or you'd be flat like a crumb." Morton turned to his siblings. He growled at Bowser Junior, "Hey, you! Go see Peach now, or you won't have eyes to see her with!"

Bowser Junior crossed his arms. "I'm not taking orders from no coward. I want _Roy_ to-"

"GO!" Morton roared, his claws getting dangerously close to Junior's face.

Junior lifted himself off the floor and went running down the hallway, howling "MAAAAMAAA PEEEEACH!" the whole way.

Ludwig cupped his claws around his face and yelled, "Remember to be dramatic!"

xxxx0o0o0o0o0o0o0xxxx

Peach had just settled back into her television show when fists began banging on her door again. She rolled her eyes and yelled, "Bowser, I told you! I'm not-"

"MAMA PEEEACH!" The banging persisted and Peach grew curious.

"Bowser Jr.? Is that you?" Peach walked over to the door, the banging growing quite obnoxious. She swung it open and Bowser Jr. landed flat on his face from leaning on the door and banging it.

He pulled his face off the plush carpet and looked up at Princess Peach. "MamaPeach! !" Bowser Jr. paused for a breath and wailed.

Peach knelt down next to the koopaling and patted him. "Whoa, whoa, whoa, slow down there! Now, what's going on?" Bowser Junior was almost choking on tears and the carpet he had accidentally torn up with his teeth. Peach sighed and walked over to the room's coffee machine. She poured a bag of koopa leaf tea in the machine and, within seconds, produced a simmering cup of green liquid. She placed it on her bed stand. After a bit of an effort, she managed to pick Bowser Junior up and set him on her lap.

Peach grabbed the tea and placed a finger over Bowser's mouth, as he was still wailing his heart out. "Settle down and drink this." She handed him the cup and he drank greedily, the tea calming him quickly. Peach smiled. "Alright, now tell me what's going on that upset you so much."

Junior frowned at Peach. She imagined that if he hadn't been holding the teacup, his claws would be on his hips. "I'm not upset!"

Peach cocked her eyebrows. "You're not? Okay then, tell me anyway."

Junior nodded. "You hafta go to dinner with Daddy." Peach sighed and rolled her eyes. Before she could argue, Junior continued. "Iggy said there was something important and then Larry said Daddy was yelling and then Ludwig said something in French and then I said something and then I got yelled at and then Wendy said something and then Morton yelled at me and then him and Roy got in a fight and then I said something and then I came here. THAT'S why you hafta go."

Peach obviously hadn't followed it completely. "That's…nice…but _why_ is it so important I go to dinner? I mean, I'm stuck here for a week, so it's not like I'm never gonna see your…father." Mentally, Peach praised herself for keeping her temper down.

Junior frowned again. "Its VERY impear…impera…imperatif…yeah…that you go! That's what Ludwig said."

Peach smiled. How could she not, when Bowser Jr. was being so cute? "Okay, but why? _Why_?"

Junior laughed. "So Daddy will be happy, duh!" Junior giggled again; apparently quite amused Peach didn't notice this obvious piece of logic. "He hasn't seen Mama Peach for a very long time and he missed her."

Peach was silent for a moment, registering what the young koopaling had told her. "But he's got a whole castle- excuse me, Palace- full of people. How could he miss me when he's so busy and surrounded by koopas?"

Junior looked up into Peach's blue eyes. "It's a very big palace, Mama Peach. And when you're in a very big palace without your best friend, it gets very lonely, no matter how many other people are by you."

_Best friend?_ Probably just another lie Bowser was feeding to his kids…._Best Friend?_ Peach frowned. She felt almost pity for Bowser. "Hey Junior…? I'll go. But don't tell your Daddy, I want to surprise him." _That way, if I don't go, its not like I promised I would…_

Bowser Junior grinned a very full grin and threw his arms around Peach, forgetting about his teacup in his claw. "Thank you, Mama Peach!" He said, cheerfully. As Bowser Junior stood to leave, he turned and asked, "Was I dramatic enough? Cause Ludwig said something and then Iggy interrupted him and then he said-"

"Yes, you were dramatic enough," Peach laughed. Junior smiled and ran out the door. As Peach stood to shut the door, she saw the rather large tea-stain. Shaking her head, she murmured, "Thank goodness for maids."

Peach walked over to her closet and sighed. _What had she gotten herself into?_

xxxx0o0o0o0o0o0o0xxxx

Bowser stared at the large stone clock, a replica of his face, staring down on the Dining Hall. _7:32…_ Bowser began pacing, shifting uncomfortably in his formal shell, black with silver spikes. He faced Kammy, biting into her third cream puff. "Do you think she fell into a net?"

Kammy rolled her eyes. "No, I don't think she fell into a net. Or a clinically insane goomba's trap. Or a pit of lava. Or cornered by a chain-chomp. Or stuck in her dress. Or overdosed on sleeping medicine. Or anything like that. _I think she's just late, Bowser._" She kept eating her puff until the King knocked it out of her claw. She snarled, "What was that for?"

"Don't eat before dinner."

Kammy sighed and summoned her cream puff back into her claw, brushing it clean before biting again. Her mouth full, she said, "It's not like I'm eating with you two or anything." Her next chew was a bit fiercer than the rest. Kammy swallowed and continued. "You sound like I'm your kid or something."

"Where are they anyway?"

"Your kids? Or Peach? Your kids are with Cookoopa and Kamek. For the millionth time, I don't _know_ where Peach is. She's probably just-"

Bowser gasped in delight as he heard the rushed click-clacking of a lady running in high-heels. Kammy glared and quite violently disintegrated her cream puff. "There's the little drama-princess now." She summoned her broom and sat on it, her arms crossed. "Farwell, King Bowser." However, her comment fell on deaf ears- Bowser was still watching Peach run, her hair flipping in the air as she went. Kammy pouted and soared out of the Dining Hall, passing the musicians and hence cuing them to begin playing.

As Peach drew closer, Bowser titled his head in a practiced bow. Grinning foolishly, he said, "Thanks for coming."

Peach caught her breath and brushed a piece of hair out of her face. "Sorry I'm late. I got lost on the way. This is a _really_ big place." As Bowser continued grinning, Junior's words echoed in the Princess's ears… _when you're in a very big palace without your best friend, it gets very lonely…_

Peach headed over to the only table in the room and Bowser rushed to follow her. Muttering etiquette rules under his breath, he pulled the chair out for the Princess. His lesson that day with Kammy had been quite boring as the king he was used to not being respectful to anyone. But Peach was a different matter- he would go through weeks of boring etiquette lessons to impress her. He sat across from her and grinned yet again.

Peach shifted uncomfortably in her chair. It was weird to be sitting at a table for two with her mortal enemy. Luckily the awkward silence (and slightly disturbing grinning) was interrupted early on by the server's appearance.

The server was a koopa adorned in a black suit and cap and reminded Peach spookily of the toad waiter back home that had served herself and her friends. He smiled at them both and said, "Good evening Sir and Madam. Tonight's menu consists of Mushroom Salad, French-Onion Soup, and-"

"Steak?" Bowser interrupted excitedly.

The waiter just smiled. "Yes, sire, steak. For dessert we will be serving molten-chocolate cakes with vanilla bean ice-cream. Are there any drink requests?"

"Do you have any fresh juice?" Peach inquired politely, her hands comfortably in her lap.

The waiter took a low nod. "I recommend for tonight's menu sparkling white-apple."

"I'll have that then," Peach told him.

"The same," Bowser grunted.

The waiter curtly nodded and left for the kitchen, leaving Bowser to attempt small-talk with the princess. She ended all his attempts at conversation prematurely, leaving him slightly frustrated.

The salad appetizer was eaten mostly in silence, broken only by Bowser informing Peach of his latest and greatest accomplishments, both in politics and economy and leisure. Peach nodded, mostly ignoring him, eating her greens slowly and politely while Bowser watched. His plate was emptied before hers was even half done.

Peach thought for a good while about _what_ gave the salad such a peculiar and delicious flavor. She voiced her question to the server when he came, not even noticing she had interrupted Bowser in his attempts to converse with her. The server looked apologetically at the King, Bowser only scowling slightly and waving him to answer. He nodded to the both of them and said, "That would be the dressing you're noticing. It's vinaigrette with koopafruit and cheep-cheep oil." Peach almost gagged, imagining the combination.

The server took their plates and replaced them with the soup and steak, Bowser grinning as he looked upon the juicy meat.

Peach, as delicately as she could, cut through the steak, watching juices seep through. She bit into her piece and chewed, closing her eyes in pleasure. Bowser smiled as he watched her eat. "Good, isn't it?"

Peach opened her eyes and frowned. She swallowed and looked just over the koopa's shoulder. "Yes, quite good." She noticed Bowser's grin had spread further as he sawed into his own steak, eating a bite of quite larger size than the Princesses.

"I requested it for you," he said through a mouthful.

Peach placed her fork lightly on the plate and began on her soup instead, sipping it politely and enjoying it. It was good as well, but the steak was a lot more fulfilling.

Bowser cleared his throat as he tried again at conversation. "So, do you have any plans for this week? I mean, now that you're here…"

Peach avoided Bowser's eyes and took another sip. Quietly, she said, "You know, I really don't _want_ to be here."

Although he had known this, the blatant comment still stung Bowser. "You can still enjoy yourself …Still have a good week."

Peach took another sip of soup, longingly glancing at the steak, not realizing the only reason she wasn't letting herself eat it was because Bowser wanted her to. Looking up, she told him, "Being kidnapped isn't my idea of a _good week_, Bowser."

Bowser glared at Peach from over the table. "I didn't kidnap you, I've told you that! It _wasn't my idea._"

Peach retorted back, "But you certainly aren't doing anything to keep me from being held hostage here."

Bowser's voice rose slightly as he seethed to her, "Do you really want me to send you back to your castle? So all your servants and subjects know that the first time Princess Peach ever went out unattended she was kidnapped by _children_?"

"Yes! No…I don't know! I just know I _don't want to be here_." Peach angrily dipped her spoon into the soup, taking another sip with a bit too much fervor.

"You can at least _attempt_ and enjoy yourself, Peach," Bowser snarled. "I just want you to be happy!"

"Well I can't be happy here," Peach almost yelled as she stood and threw her napkin on the chair.

Bowser frowned, quite hurt, as she headed towards the dining room doors. "Don't you want your steak?" He tried.

"No! I don't want anything to do with you!" She yelled back, almost running across the parquet floor and pushing through the doors. Peach felt her eyes stinging with…were those tears?

She pushed her way into her room, noticing the tea-stain was gone and a mint was sitting on her pillow. Hungrily, she rushed to the mint and opened it, kicking her high-heels off. She slipped it into her mouth and chewed, noticing writing on the wrapper. It read, _To truly be fair and good, one must try to be fair and good first. Do not judge others and give even those who have had a chance yet another. Only then will you truly be fair and good. _"What is this," Peach said through sniffles. "A fortune cookie?"

She read the message again, the words stinging her as she thought about her actions. She crumpled the wrapper and chucked it across the room, letting it fall on the just-vacuumed floor. "I _am_ fair and good…" She said to herself, "I really am…What's happened? Why does it have to be different _here_?"

She fell back onto the sheets, thinking over everything anyone had said to her since she arrived. Everyone had a similar message- give Bowser a chance; he just wants you to be happy. Had she done that?

_His 'Best Friend'…_If that was true, she sure was a crappy one.

Peach sighed and thought over the mint's message again. Her stomach rumbled, reminding her of the uneaten steak and dessert yet to come. She thought about the server, about Bowser, about everything. She thought about the vinaigrette…she had loved it before she knew what she was loving…it was only when she knew what it was that she hated it. _It's just vinaigrette, Peach…no reason to get metaphorical._

Peach sighed, feeling terrible. She decided she was going to change, that she would become 'fair and good'. That she would be the person she prided herself in being, not the one that had stormed out of the dining hall. As she made resolutions, a few knocks hit her door.

Peach sniffed and wiped her eyes with her gloves, opening the door and half expecting to see Bowser. However, no one was eye-level. A clearing of the throat alerted Peach's attention to the floor where the blue spider stood, holding her plate of steak. "Esscusse me, mees," He began, making Peach smile slightly. "'Is Majestee said te give thees te yu. 'E said 'e requested eet for yu and wanted yu te not gu hoongry."

Peach smiled and took the plate from the spider, the aroma of it reminding her of her hunger. "'Is Majestee is veree fond o' yu. 'E don't want yu hoongry," he repeated.

Peach looked at the steak, only one bite taken from it. "Thank you," she told the spider, her eyes not leaving the plate. "I appreciate this."

The spider grinned and scuttled off, leaving Peach and the remains of her dinner. Although it took a bit of effort, Peach smiled as she accepted what Bowser had done for her, the dinner and all. She took a bite of steak, courtesy of the koopa king, and savored it even more-so.

* * *

**Author's note: **Once again, I'm sorry for taking so long, especially with such an amazing reaction I got last chapter. You all never cease to amaze me with your words of kindness, both in reviews here and elsewhere. This chapter, for example, might not have been nearly as long (definetly not) if not for MikariStar and her support over on my LJ. -snugs- thanks again! She also wrote a cute little one-shot dedicated to the steak featured in this chapter, the priary reason I didn't quit when my computer went hay-wire, believe it or not. ;)

Sorry my ANs are so long this chapter...I just feel like I owe you guys a lot. Seriously, my reviewers rock. I think the other members of ebtwisty9 are jelous of me 'cause of you guys. ;) Oh and to those of you who like the koopalings -coughMissLiacough- I'm trying to work them into the plot in more ways than originally planned. But planning is getting really scary for me because it seems like the end is near...its not really, but...okay fine I'll shush up and let you review before you forget the chapter. ;)

Thanks again for being so amazing! You guys inspire me in the hard times school throws at me.

Razzi


	10. Exploring the Unexplored

**Foreword:** Oh look, another chapter. :) This one honestly seems a bit slow-paced to me, almost like a filler chapter, especially compared to the drama of last chappie. This is an odd section of the story, the turning point, the building up of the climax, the subtle (and not so subtle) changes in characters, and kind of the bridge before the fluff. So bear with me:o And enjoy this as much as you can. ;)

Oh yeah. I don't own any of the characters. Though with all the changes I'm giving them, I'm not sure Nintendo will want them back. ;)

* * *

Lounging in his chair, Bowser recounted the events of his dinner Sunday evening with his son yet again. Chewing on his pencil's eraser, Iggy leaned back in his chair. He intended to take this shrink-thing his Dad had asked him to do and run with it. After all, shrinks get paid a _lot_.

"So you're certain that was the extent of your conversation last night?"

"Yes," Bowser grumbled, rubbing his temples. Trying to figure out women was not something he wanted to do, it hurt his brain. "I asked if she wanted her steak and she ran off."

"And then later on, you sent the steak remains to her with a spider?"

"Yeah. Do you think I should have sent dessert too?"

Iggy looked at his father over his glasses. "It depends. What was served for dessert?"

"Molten-chocolate cakes with ice cream."

Iggy's façade dropped almost immediately and he bolted upright in his chair. "Did you save any for me?"

Bowser scowled at his son. "What about Peach?"

"Oh… well," Iggy cleared his throat and professionally looked over his clip-board, covered in doodles. "I don't think whether or not you sent up dessert affected her actions at the actual dinner. Maybe she just-"

"Was acting rude and in an uncalled for manner?" The two koopas gasped at the person who had voiced the suggestion. Princess Peach tried to smile as she stepped into the room. She had to ask four different servants where to find Bowser that morning, and once she had, she just stood in the doorway, listening to the two of them.

"Peach…" Bowser stumbled to his feet, surprised by her sudden appearance.

Peach shuffled her feet hidden under her dress. "I'm ashamed of how I acted yesterday. I was rude and unfair. I intend to make it up to you this week."

Bowser felt like his heart was getting caught in his throat. Images and fantasies of how she could 'make it up' to him started whizzing past his mind. Then he caught himself; this was no time to day-dream. If he intended to keep this reality a reality, he had to stay _in_ reality.

Peach continued, luckily having not seen Bowser's greedy face for those few seconds. "I'm going to make an effort not to be the pain-in-the-neck I normally am when kidnapped. I-I've been thinking about what you were saying and I really am sorry for my reaction. It was very un-princess like behavior, but…it just felt natural. I intend to change that."

Bowser grinned. "Just as long as you don't change too much, Peach. I like you how you are."

Peach bit back remarks and thoughts that were filling her head and simply said "Thank you". Relief washed over her and she smiled. Once she put aside the bitter and prejudiced feelings she harbored towards Bowser, it was a lot easier to accept things as she would if they were coming from anyone else. _Maybe this 'fair and good' stuff won't be too hard after all._

xxxx0o0o0o0o0o0o0xxxx

Iggy watched his father talking to Peach, his tail swishing slightly in pleasure, and he couldn't help but smile. Bowser was so often harsh, coarse, and reserved, scowling and relying on the pain of others to cheer him up. All Peach had to do was talk to him and he was happier than he ever was watching Roy beat up bunny rabbits or listening to goombas complain about the pointlessness of dragging 50 tons of flour across the entire palace.

Iggy looked away from his father and to his notebook, noticing how one of his mindless doodles was actually pretty cool-looking. He happily bit his tongue and lifted his feet off the ground and onto his chair, propping the clip-board against his legs as he made notes and further doodles. Engulfed in ideas for what he could turn the doodle into, he didn't notice his father leave with Peach.

Bowser had decided that Peach needed to know her way around the palace. He had told her about a few rooms already, watching her face as she thought, blinked, walked. Chills went down Bowser's spine as her skirt touched his leg as they rounded a corner.

"And what's that?" Peach asked, pointing a delicate finger towards a long hallway.

Bowser grinned in pride. "That," he began, "Is one of thirty-seven entrances to the central-power duct. Would you like to go in?"

"Sure," she replied curiously. _Why on earth would they need thirty-seven entrances?_ Peach wondered. Surely a generator wouldn't be that big. When they approached the door, Bowser turned the knob left, left, right, left, and right again. With a hiss, the door opened revealing- a closet.

Glancing at the Koopa King, Peach asked, "What's with the security-knob for _a closet_?"

Bowser fished through goggles, shells, suits, and all sorts of things Peach didn't recognize as he answered. "If someone got into the power duct who wasn't supposed to, all life in Darklands could halt. The Volcanopalace isn't here just for decoration, it actually has a purpose." Bowser turned to Peach, two pairs of goggles in his hand. "And that purpose isn't _just_ to show how amazing I am to be able to live in it." He grinned.

Peach felt a smile forming on her lips. Bowser was so cocky, it was almost funny. The king handed her a pair of goggles and continued fishing through equipment. He pulled out a small black jacket and handed it to the Princess. "You have to be careful, sometimes the equipment sparks." Bowser snapped his goggles on and looked through the much-darker room at Peach. Frowning, he reminded her that goggles were for wearing, not holding, and that he didn't want her to go blind.

Peach frowned back. "It'll be too dark. I'll put them on when we go in."

"I'm not letting you go in unless you have them on."

Peach laughed as she snapped them on. "You sound like you're my mother."

Smirking, Bowser replied, "Having eight kids does that to you." _Wait, eight kids?I thought…_ Before Peach could imagine eight miniature Bowsers running around, Bowser opened the door. At once, light hit Peach so hard; she forgot how dark she had thought it had been with the goggles on.

As her eyes adjusted, she realized why there were thirty-seven entrances. The 'central-power duct' proved to her that VolcanoPalace wasn't just a name to bluff with. Lava poured from dozens of pipes, gears and pulleys of all kinds moving around, lifting, lowering, turning, and moving the lava from place to place. The clatter and commotion was a horrible droning sound to Peach, but Bowser seemed to enjoy it. A loud bell rang out and a hutch opened up, an avalanche of rocks tumbling down, some falling into the waterfall of lava falling down the center. They melted almost instantly, and Peach realized how hot she was.

Peach stared through her goggles at the sight for a few minutes, growing ever hotter. She watched torrents of lava tumble down countless stories, the huge, cylindrical room with doors scattered through the floors. Occasionally a few doors opened and koopas with clipboards stepped out and goombas with carts pushed through.

Peach wiped sweat off her forehead. She felt herself get dizzy and grabbed Bowser's arm to get his attention. Her mouth felt dry, but she managed to tell him over the clatter, "I'm really hot."

Bowser laughed. He raised an eyebrow; a bit surprised Peach would say that. _You sure are…_

Peach frowned and tugged harder, feeling her legs grow weak. "Bowser, I'm really…Bowser!" she whined. The heat had gone to her head and she couldn't seem to think straight or even form complete sentences.

Peach's desperate tone caught Bowser's attention. He looked down at the princess, sweat sparkling under her blonde hair. Bowser frowned, remembering that the heat affected Peach differently than it did him; Peach wasn't cold-blooded. "Alright, let's go," he said.

Bowser directed Peach out of the room and in comparison; the closet's temperature hit Peach like an icy wall. She gasped and pulled her goggles off her face. "Now I'm cold," Peach commented.

Bowser smirked at her. "You're just never happy, are you?"

Peach smiled a bit. "Guess not." Peach thought about the dozens of come-backs she could have thrown at Bowser, but for some reason, she didn't want to. She felt herself warm up and looked at her pristine white gloves. "That's a really cool, er, room, Bowser. But I don't think it's built for humans to go gallivanting in." She looked up at Bowser and smiled, trying to show it was a joke. Bowser grinned back. A strange lump formed in Peach's throat, probably one from her remembering she was 'hanging out' with Bowser, and she tried to clear her throat to get rid of it. "Uh, let's keep going. I still don't know how to get around this place…"

Bowser furrowed his brow, almost forgetting why Peach was here. "Oh…the tour…of course!" He opened the door for the princess and showed her out. As they walked through the halls, Bowser said, "Peach, how come you got so hot in there?"

Peach looked up at Bowser and raised an eyebrow. "I thought we covered this. You're a koopa, I'm a human." Bowser nodded. The truth was painfully obvious. "You and I are affected by the heat differently."

Bowser sighed. "I know, that's my question. Mario has been in rooms much hotter than that, stepping right over lava, and he hasn't gotten that weak yet. Not even a sweat." Bowser growled as he spoke, Peach could tell how it frustrated the Koopa King.

"Bowser, Mario also manages to chuck you across the room and most people can't even lift your shell. Mario is…an exception. To pretty much everything." Peach smiled as she thought about Mario, trying her best not to frown as she thought of things besides laws of physics that Mario seemed to be an exception for. The rules of courtship, for instance…

Bowser looked at Peach's face (she was still smiling, and Bowser couldn't see it was forced) and growled in anger and jealousy. "Are we touring my palace or talking about some plumber?"

Peach snapped out of her short day-dream and laughed. "Alright, let's keep going."

It hit Peach once again how odd her situation was, allowing Bowser to tour her around the palace and she had so far enjoyed herself. Bowser's cockiness and pride in his kingdom was funny, and his love for his kids and kingdom was almost cute. He showed her rooms for meetings, experiments, power, leisure, and some with purposes she didn't even remember.

Bowser's tour screeched to a halt when he pointed to a large oaken door painted black with a golden moon on it. "And this-" he began. Bowser frowned. "This is where I'm supposed to be having a meeting right now."

"Oh!" Peach exclaimed, "I didn't realize-"

Bower waved off her concern. "No big deal. But it is a really important meeting, so I really should…" Bowser sighed. He didn't want to leave Peach. They were enjoying themselves, she was listening to him, commenting, and Bowser was having a wonderful time. But his kingdom needed him, he wasn't supposed to miss this meeting, the topic at hand had gotten rather out of control and needed his input.

Peach shook her head. "Then go, Bowser."

"But you-"

Peach held up her index finger to silence him. "I can handle myself. If you're late…"

Bowser laughed. He raised his head in pride and said, "King Bowser is never late."

Peach smirked. "Everyone else is just early, right?"

Bowser's eyes lit up. "That's a great excuse!"

Peach laughed whole-heartedly. When she let him be, Bowser really was fun to be around. Wait, what? Peach shook her head and frowned at herself. _Fair and Good_ is different from _insane_. She looked away from Bowser's eyes. "You should go to your meeting."

Not noticing Peach's change of tone, Bowser continued to smile as he nodded. "As you wish. I'll have an assistant finish the tour, highness." Bowser opened the oaken door and roared, "Koofia, get out here!"

A rather bent-out-of-shape old koopa lady excused herself from her panel and heaved her way out of the meeting room. "Yissiya?" She hissed in a horse voice.

Bowser placed his claw on Peach's shoulder and smiled. "Finish Princess Peach's tour of the VolcanoPalace. Now."

Peach looked at Bowser's claw, very gingerly touching her shoulder. She shuddered, but couldn't resist enjoying the strange warmth that his hand seemed to have. Certainly she wasn't enjoying his touch, just…just the warmth.

"Yissiya," Koofia answered and turned to the princess, Bowser lifting his claw off her shoulder. "Follome, Princessss Peach." Koofia hobbled down the hall and Peach began to follow her.

Bowser put his clawed hand that had touched Peach in his other one and smiled. He bent towards Peach and whispered, "Koofia's a little…well she's hard on hearing and not so keen on sight. But she knows the palace like the back of her claw; she'll take you back here when the meeting's over. In about an hour and a half." Bowser stood up and smiled. He knew what _he_ would do in Peach's situation- cut it and run while Koofia wasn't looking.

Bowser smirked at the thought. "See you later, Peach." The words sounded sweet on his lips. _See you later_…she'd remain here, happy, and he'd remain happy as well. He grinned.

Peach looked over her shoulder at the Koopa King and smiled. How could she not, his grin was so contagious. "Yeah," she called. More to herself, she added, "See you later." _See you later…_

Koofia continued hobbling down the hall, pointing out rooms and telling Peach some pointless information about them until Bowser could no longer see them. He swore he saw Peach look over her shoulder once more, but couldn't tell. It might have just been wishful thinking.

He sighed and reluctantly entered the meeting room. As he seated himself in the room's center, he smirked, growling, "Why were you all so early?"

xxxx0o0o0o0o0o0o0xxxx

Peach stared blankly into the room Koofia had just pointed at. Her tour guide mumbled something in a horse, slurred whisper and continued hobbling down the hallway. In a state of unrelenting boredom, Peach followed, walking with alternating shoes, putting her left foot to the far right and vice versa. As she continued in the unlady-like manner, Peach tripped. Luckily she caught herself before falling face first, but she had still gasped quite loudly.

Fixing her hair, she glanced at Koofia, advancing through the halls as if nothing had happened. The guide stopped to point at another room, apparently unaware Peach had fallen far behind. Smiling, Peach remembered what Bowser had whispered to her in that strange, warm whisper of his. Peach rushed up to Koofia and waved her hand behind Koofia's head. No response. Peach tried countless other gestures. No response. It seemed as if Koofia had forgotten Peach even existed.

Perhaps…Peach could meet up with Koofia at the end. No one would be the wiser if she spent her time on her own tour, actually enjoying herself. She cleared her throat, but Koofia just continued on. "I'm, uh…going to leave now," Peach said. She stared in shock as Koofia made no reaction. _Hey, at least I told her…_

Peach followed Koofia as she continued down the hall, falling behind and walking slower and slower, hoping to make a clean get-away. Peach grinned as Koofia rounded the corner and the princess took off the opposite direction down the deserted hall.

xxxx0o0o0o0o0o0o0xxxx

She turned down another hall and up a flight of stairs, and to her surprise heard off in the distance a piano…a beautiful piano. Curious, Peach followed the noise to a door, torches on either side lit. Peach had realized by then that the lit torches were a sign of the room's occupation.

Peach put her ear to the door and heard the music, still a bit muffled. Excitement rushed through the princess as she twisted the knob open. Vacations were a lot more fun this way, with no rules and no clue what was going on.

Music blasted Peach as the door swung open. Still in a bit of a shock, Peach gingerly closed the door behind her. The room had music pieces littered all over the floor, instruments, some that she recognized and some that she didn't, in every corner. In the room's center sat a brilliant grand piano, music and ink in piles and puddles on either side. Obviously, the virtuoso playing was also a brilliant composer.

Chords, dissonance, and all sorts of musical brilliance rang out while Peach approached the piano. Peach gasped when she saw the piano's player, entrapped in his own creation. Seated on the bench was a koopaling with a huge, tangled mass of blue hair. With the exception of his hair and a few facial features, the koopaling looked a lot like Bowser, just smaller.

Her gasp sent shudders of shock and surprise down Ludwig's back and he gasped as well, his well-exercised claws hitting quite a few clashing notes. "Princess Peach!" Ludwig flushed red and began shuffling his papers together. "For what reason am I blessed by your presence?"

Slightly flustered by the adolescent's vocabulary and compliments, it took Peach a second or two to respond. "Just exploring. What's your name?"

Ludwig thrust a claw towards Peach. "Ludwig Von Koopa. Eldest son of His Excellency, King Bowser."

Peach smiled and shook the offered claw. "What a pleasure to meet you, Ludwig Von Koopa. And I could tell you were Bowser's son."

Ludwig blushed again. "We've met before, your highness. But it isn't your culpability to forget it; it wasn't a very memorable moment for someone of your status."

Peach let her hand fall and sat next to the koopaling on the bench, choosing to ignore his comment. "That was a very impressive song, Ludwig."

Ludwig smiled and said, "Thank you. I began composing this movement on Friday. I hope to finish the entire concerto by Father's birthday on Thursday."

Peach raised her eyebrows. "That's an ambitious goal."

Ludwig drew his attention to the music sheet and began scratching notes out with his quill. "Well, I feel quite confident I can finish. This piece has been a pet-project for me of late and I've grown quite attached to it. I feel my musical capabilities are all showcased quite well and that I captured the essence of the inspirational ideas. The piece is practically composing itself." He quietly hummed a few notes and grinned, scribbling them down furiously in place of the ones he just scratched out, ink splatters just missing Peach's face.

She laughed. "You're very dedicated. I didn't even realize Bowser's birthday was Thursday."

Ludwig spun to face Peach. "You didn't? Well, that was the rationale on which we decided to bring you here, for his birthday!" Ludwig reached back and buried his claw in his large, blue hair, scratching his head. "I'm not positive you were supposed to know that though."

Peach furrowed her brow. "Why did you want me to come for his birthday?"

Ludwig smiled. "You can't be serious, your highness. It's quite noticeable that Father is, as they say, 'head-over-heels' infatuated with you and would only be happy with you by his side."

Peach felt a lump in her stomach. What was that? Anger? No, surprise? Not that, it was something she would have expected from Bowser. A feeling of disgust? No, not at all…she couldn't pinpoint the feeling and tried to dismiss it.

After clearing her throat, Peach asked Ludwig to play what he had so far written of the song. Ludwig chuckled. "Oh no, Princess Peach. You've already heard too much, you'll hear it on Thursday with everyone else. But…perhaps I could get your opinion on this latest system here." Ludwig played about half a line of music, ending with a fairly unsatisfactory chord. "What do you think? I'm not, in actuality, satisfied at all with it."

"Try a major triad progression instead."

Ludwig played the measure with Peach's change and his face lit up. "Brilliant!" Murmuring to himself, Ludwig began scribbling all over his music again.

Laughing, Peach told him, "I'd better get going. I don't want your Father to send out the cavalry for me not being where I'm supposed to be. Speaking of which…shouldn't you be in school?"

Ludwig shook his head and put his quill down. "I _am_ in school; this is my 'Personal Studies' period. Father wants us to have time in our day to progress our natural abilities and improve what we enjoy as well as what we require for an absolute education. My tutor has stopped instructing me, so I spend my periods here," Ludwig gestured to the room with an ink-splattered arm, "In my castle of solitude and music." He turned to the princess. "So where are _you_ supposed to be?"

"On a tour of the palace. Bowser had started to show me around, but then he had a meeting and had some other koopa lead me around."

Just then, the door slammed open and Roy ran in, slamming the door behind him. "Oh hey," he said to Peach and Ludwig, grinning. He walked nonchalantly over to the piano where Peach and Ludwig sat.

"What in Darklands is going on out there?" Ludwig hissed to his brother. Roy leaned against the piano and folded his arms. Before he could answer, Ludwig hollered, "Watch your shell!"

Roy leapt up and laughed. "Oh yeah, dat. Forgot datchoh pianah is wood, not stone."

"I'm never getting a stone piano, and you can't compel me to, ever," Ludwig snarled.

Roy put his hands up. "I know, bro. Calm down. So watchu doin' here, Mama Peach?"

Ludwig answered for her. "She was just informing me that she was being given a tour of the castle and excused herself."

Roy's eyes lit with amusement from behind his sunglasses. "You ditched? Sweet. Who da bore?"

Peach furrowed her brow. "Excuse me?"

Roy rolled his eyes and started to lean against the piano again. Ludwig's carefully aimed breath sent a burst of flame at Roy. "I got da message, Ludo!" He straightened himself out and sent a glare towards his eldest brother. "So Peach, I was askin' who was tourin' ya?"

Peach shrugged. "I think Bowser said her name was 'Koofia' or something."

Roy grinned. "Smart job ditchin' her. That lady bores da teeth outta us, but she's _so_ easy teh ditch." Peach felt a bit bad when it hit her that she really had ditched. What was it about the palace that made her act so out of character? Come to think of it, she had done the exact same thing by coming on this vacation.

Somehow, Roy noticed her unrest while Ludwig began playing with full-vigor again. "Don't sweat it, Peachy. You're on vacation, right? So act like it. Have some real fun. Throw caution to the wind and really _live_. Got it?" Roy elbowed Peach with a secret grin.

Allowing herself a half-smile, Peach nodded. "I guess that _was_ the whole point of me leaving the Mushroom Kingdom…" Memories flooded Peach's mind. It seemed so long ago that she had been eating breakfast in her castle, and now that she thought of the soft, fluffy pancakes, just thick enough to make them truly "hearty", her stomach clenched. She hadn't eaten since that steak last night while finishing up another Darklands Soap Opera (They really seemed to be quite addictive…Peach had no idea why).

Peach daintily cleared her throat, trying to think of something to get her mind off her guilt and her hunger. "I don't think I've really met you. What's your name?"

Roy thrust a claw out to Peach. "'Name's Roy. Roy Koopa." _Ah, another of Bowser's children…_Peach smiled and went to shake the claw when Roy withdrew it quickly. "Psyche!" He laughed and ignored the daggers Ludwig was shooting at him with his eyes.

Peach rolled her eyes and smiled. She was used to that sort of thing from the younger toads and honestly enjoyed it. "Roy," she asked, "where are _you_ supposed to be right now?"

Roy cracked his knuckles before answering. "Da Lemstah and I are in da same PS class and we were playing Ultimate Tag." He glared at Peach. "I told ya that 'cause I don't tink you'd be de one teh spill it. So don't. Got me?"

Peach looked curiously at Roy. "What's so bad about Tag?"

Roy almost looked shock that Peach wouldn't know. "It ain't cool! Dude, you'd tink I was de only one who actually _cared_ about my image around here."

Ludwig didn't even look up as he said with a smirk. "That's affirmative." With a roar of surprise, he jumped off the stool and began to swat at his large blue hair-do, now lit from Roy's flame. Once it was finally out he glared at his younger brother. Thrusting a claw towards the door, he roared, "Get out, Roy, before you ignite my compositions and start an inferno!"

Roy raised an eyebrow. "Chill, smart-alek. It's your fault you don't cut your hair."

"At least I have hair to cut," Ludwig snarled as he began collecting his scattered music pages from the floor.

Roy glared at his brother. "I'm lettin' that one slip, smarty, but I ain't finished here. Okay, well, I am for now, but that's just 'cuz its boring me, not cause you said so."

Peach rolled her eyes, the tiff reminding her slightly of the 'fights' she would have with Daisy. Peach was very close to her cousin, sometimes it seemed Daisy was at the Mushroom Kingdom more than she was Sarasaland. Probably because she didn't really want to be queen- at all. She looked over at Roy, heading for the door. "Hey, I'll go with you." She turned politely to Ludwig as she got off the piano bench. "I've got to get to Bowser's conference room before Koofia does. Thank you for playing for me, it was excellent." She curtsied to Ludwig who bowed his head in reply, still snarling slightly as he picked up the scattered music.

Peach waved one last time before leaving with Roy. "So, Roy, do you think you could show me to Bowser's conference room?"

Roy strained his brain in thought. The top of his red head came about up to Peach's shoulder. "Shoi. Pops should be in the Moon Room 'bout now. Follah me." Roy headed down the halls, Peach pointing out curious looking rooms and trying to decipher what Roy was telling her about them.

After a few minutes, the two heard stomping feet smacking the stone floor, obviously not those of the light-toed maids or polite officials moving through the halls. Roy's face lit up. "That's the Lemstah now. I've gotta get goin', Mama Peach."

"Wait, how'm I supposed to get to the meeting from here?"

Roy was running backwards by now. He called out, "Make a left at the next junction, then right at the kitchen. If you hit the work-out room, you've gone too far." He spun around and took off down the halls. Peach walked at a normal pace until she was almost bowled over by another teenager-koopaling. The two tripped and fell to the fall with dual "oomph"s.

The koopaling got up and ran his hand through his head of rainbow-hair, gasping as he saw who had had knocked down. "Mama Peach!" He shouted and extended a claw to lift her up. Peach tried to look the koopaling in the eye to thank him, but his one eye kept moving in all different directions. Looking into his good eye, Peach thanked him. "Thanks for what? I knocked you over."

"Thanks for helping me up," Peach explained, a bit surprised he didn't know that.

"Oh, that." Peach noticed the koopaling had quite a loud voice and a goofy grin, just like his father. Or, at least, she assumed this was another of his eight children. He extended a claw and continued to grin. "My name's Lemmy. I'm King Dad's son."

Peach couldn't help smiling at the cute koopaling. He was obviously not as brilliant as Ludwig or as quick-on-the-uptake as Roy, but he seemed smart in his own way. Peach took her gloved hand and shook Lemmy's claw. "I'm Princess Peach Toadstool."

Lemmy nodded vigorously. "I know. I have to go now, bye Mama Peach!" Without waiting for a response, Lemmy took off in the direction Roy had run. Peach giggled and continued on her way.

xxxx0o0o0o0o0o0o0xxxx

Bowser rubbed his temples. He hated meetings, especially when they kept him away from Peach. "Kamek," he groaned, "is it over yet?"

Kamek looked up at his king. "Not yet, sire. But we're almost done with the business at hand."

"Good," Bowser snarled. He tried to listen again to the accusing shouts of different representatives over inappropriate oil usage. Oil wasn't used very often in the Darklands and so the supply was limited. Bowser shut his eyes tightly and snapped them open. "_Shut up already!_" He bellowed. The hall silenced, many representatives quivering in fear, many more eager to hear Bowser's decision. "I propose that all the representatives bring, as close to exact as they can, a detailed list of oil needs to the head of Oil Distribution. I mean every stupid time somebody stupid uses oil should be on the list." Bowser, in anger, banged his clenched fist on the table. "Every-stupid-time!"

Kammy poked Bowser from the other side, unfazed by his temper. "We don't have an Oil Distribution board, sire. Everyone just…buys the oil."

Bowser rolled his eyes. "Okay then, this is what we're doing." He scanned his list of officials without jobs and found one who fit his needs perfectly. "Samuel Samuelson is going to be the head of the Darklands Oil Distribution." From the back of the hall, Samuel Samuelson, a rather tall dry-bones, looked a bit surprised, but eager. Bowser continued. "He will organize a committee and all the provinces will send their detailed list of oil needs to the Oil Distribution committee. The committee will then allot each province the needed amount of oil, no more, no less. They will decide which is fit for how much and the price of oil will raise an extra five koopacoins per barrel to assist in paying the committee. That's what we're doing. Does anyone disagree?"

With a grin of satisfaction, Bowser noted not a single claw rose into the air, probably due in part to fear. He continued. "Samuel, you need to have a committee by next Saturday and figure the rest of this stuff out. Then alert the provinces of when they need to send in the lists and all that junk that you have to. I expect the new system to start working by the end of the month. Until then, just buy the oil like you all normally do and don't start any wars over it."

The koopa in charge of the current meeting launched sparks into the air. "Are we done here?" he asked. Another blast of sparks launched from somewhere in the stands and a magikoopa in long, emerald robes stood up to speak. As Bowser turned to see him, something caught his eye. Peach. Bowser gasped and stared at her, standing in the doorway of the meeting room and waiting for the magikoopa to speak like everyone else was.

Bowser fought back the butterflies in his stomach and tried to ignore the princess, as if she was just part of the royal committee, participating in the meeting. It was strangely a lot easier to pretend than he thought. Probably because he had been fantasizing about it for years.

Bowser blinked and listened curiously to the magikoopa explaining that his province was expressing interest in the area of the gulf that Bowser had taken claim of. He spoke matter-of-factly, proud and announcing that the province would gladly pay 5,000,000 golden bars for the gulf.

Bowser announced that they would open an auction if anyone wanted it for over 5,000,000 golden bars. After a good half hour of bidding, Tchital, who had wanted it in the first place, ended up winning with 365,750,000 golden bars due to the government. The meeting adjourned and Bowser couldn't seem to get off his stand fast enough. He ran over to Peach and grinned. "What are you doing here? Where's Koofia?"

Peach smiled. His grin was really, really contagious. "I got bored and kind of…excused myself from the tour. I met a few of your kids, too." Peach added excitedly.

Bowser smiled. "That's fantastic! Who'd you meet?"

Peach ticked them off on her fingers. "Ludwig, Roy, and Lemmy, I believe. Very nice boys."

Bowser lifted his eyebrows and started to leave the room, Peach walking at his side. "Don't tell them that. They 'love being mean'. Get that from their brilliant father." Bowser grinned pompously and Peach couldn't help laughing.

"They said your birthday is on Thursday. I had no idea!" It was starting to surprise Peach how easy it was to have a conversation with the royal koopas.

Bowser rubbed the back of his neck. "Yeah, yeah it is…There's going to be a lot going on for it, I bet. Parades, banquets, parties…" Bowser tried to smile. "It should be a lot of fun this year, with you here." Something in Bowser's tone didn't convince the princess. In truth, he wasn't sure he'd enjoy his birthday if Peach was miserable. Unbeknownst to her, he'd always sent her something gracious and exquisite on his birthdays, hoping it would make her happy. That would be the best present, if Peach would be happy because of him.

Disturbing images of parades, parties, and banquets with Peach moping during them flashed past Bowser's mind.

Peach frowned, realizing that she was probably the reason Bowser wasn't looking forward to his birthday, regardless of what he said. She might not have exactly _liked_ Bowser, but that didn't mean she wanted him miserable. But what could she do? She wasn't supposed to be trying to make Bowser happy, after all. That just…wasn't how things were supposed to work.

And yet…

* * *

**Author's Note:** We're getting cloooooser:O

As I said before, this is a tough part for me to write. Fun to right, but not very climactic and kind of...boring...and Razzi does -not- like her stories to be boring! So, although I don't think I ever need to beg for reviews (you guys are so amazing, seriously! Last chapter's responce made me so happy, I'm -still- getting lovely, lovely reviews trickling in! I love you all for being so nice to me and making me feel like an accomplished writer, ha!) I just want you to know that this is just that little slow section every book has... the calm before (And after) the storm.

Anyway. I hoped you enjoyed it to some extent, the writing was fun, I can tell you that. :D

-Razzi


	11. New Light on the Situation

**Foreword: **Wow! Last chapter was liked quite a bit more and I've gotten up to...99 reviews! Its scary, it really is. But I'll tell you more about my exuberance and joy later. But I am saying that the 100th review gets a cameo in the next chapter, which I'm holding off finishing until that bit. (See, I normally have 2 chapters done before I update with one of them. That's why I always tell you about next chapter.)

Anyway. This chapter is fun for me, kind of a diving board into new realms in the story. Yes, the ending is nearing, but not without a few twists and subplots. ;)

And of course, all characters are Nintendo's. I do love borrowing them, though.

* * *

The plumbing convention seemed like its one purpose was to use all the paper they possibly could by giving all the participants as many handouts as they possibly could. It apparently didn't occur to anyone that plumbers weren't exactly interested in reading handouts.

Trying to be understanding, Mario and Luigi were sifting through and sorting the dozens and dozens of pamphlets, brochures, ads, and diagrams they had been given. The "keep" pile was quite empty compared to the "throw-out" and "use as paper-airplanes" piles. Luigi picked up a blue paper on oiling wrenches and pulled it taunt. "What-a you think o' this un, Mario?"

Mario put his yellow brochure down and inspected Luigi's paper. "Keep it-a. Good-a quality, si?" Nodding, Luigi tossed it neatly onto the tower of future paper-airplanes. As the brothers went back to "work", Luigi's phone rang. Mario watched his younger brother's face light up as he saw the caller-ID. Grinning, Mario said, "It's-a Daisy, right?"

Luigi nodded as he put the phone up to his ear. "Ciao, Daisy!...It's-a go'in fine….Si, Good-a food...No….Of-a course not!... Oh, he's-a fine…No, I haven't….are you-a sure?...But I just-a got on-a the phone!...Alright…." Luigi's face had fallen as he handed the phone to Mario. "She-a wants to-a speak to you."

Mario furrowed his eyebrows. "A-Me?" Luigi nodded as his brother took the phone. "Ciao, Daisy."

"Mario! Luigi said you haven't told him about Peach's thing yet, is it okay if I tell him?"

"What-a thing?" Mario sat himself on the edge of the bed as he listened to Daisy. It sounded like she was playing tennis on the other end.

"Y'know, the thing Peach called you about! Her little trip!"

"What little trip, Daisy?"

Daisy audibly sighed. "Mario, don't act so stupid. Y'know, the thing she called you about! The thing that's giving Toadsworth an ulcer."

"Toadsworth has an ulcer?"

"No! Well, maybe, I dunno, but Mario, seriously. Don't you know what I'm talking about?"

"Non-a clue."

"You serious?" Daisy sighed again. Then she yelled. "Mario, you made me miss a shot!"

"It's-a your fault you're-a playing tennis on the phone."

Mario could almost hear Daisy rolling her eyes. "It's not tennis, it's badminton. Seriously Mario, has Peach called you?"

Mario got off the bed and dug in his luggage for his own cell-phone. Mario only used it for business, really, but he had decided to bring it with anyway. "Si, one missed call."

"Well have you listened to her message yet? You might want to do that, like, really soon. Can I talk to Luigi now?"

Mario handed off the phone and listened to Peach's message. He smiled and said to Luigi, "Peach is-a on vacation. She's-a enjoying herself." Luigi mouthed 'good' between talking to Daisy. Within fifteen minutes, the couple had gone from talking about what had gone on in their lives to flirting.

Mario was almost done 'sorting' through the papers (meaning he was now throwing them all away after a single glance) while Luigi and Daisy talked. Mario frowned slightly under his mustache. He wished he could talk to Peach like that, but deep-down, Mario knew he couldn't. The love Luigi and Daisy had for each other ran so deep, it was no surprise Daisy had called on the first day after promising she wouldn't bug them during their "brother-bonding week".

The prime example of opposites attracting, Luigi and Daisy were the perfect dynamic. Daisy's drive and Luigi's caution melded perfectly and they hadn't had an argument for months, finding their differences invigorating and wonderful.

Mario and Peach were different…Mario had no doubt in his mind that if Peach wasn't the princess and Mario her ever-constant savior, they wouldn't be dating. In fact, Mario wasn't even sure they _were_ dating. That wasn't saying Mario didn't care for Peach, no, not at all. Mario loved being around Peach, she made his heart skip a beat and was definitely the prettiest human he had ever laid eyes on. He just…wouldn't be hoping to marry her quite so much if she wasn't princess.

If she wasn't princess, he would still try and save her from kidnappers, he would still be best-friends with her. Peach was definitely his best-friend and Mario knew she always would be. Thinking about her having feelings for Mario gave him the chills, the thought of them married and him as the Queen's Husband made him giddy. But…they didn't have what Luigi and Daisy had. They didn't have that abstract emotion that made Mario sigh in want. They didn't and they probably never would. If they hadn't found it after so many years, all they would ever be able to do is pretend they had. And so pretend they did.

Mario hadn't told his parents about his mixed-emotions; he wanted them to meet Peach first. It didn't bother him _too_ much anyway- he just figured that not everyone found true-love, that people settled. And it was a lot better to settle with someone like Peach with a relationship like theirs than what other people had to live with.

Mario ended his inner-battle smiling, feeling slightly foolish that he had to pull himself out of depression the same way every time. _You've got it better than most people…_ He turned around and saw Luigi's face had turned beet-red. Mario assumed Daisy had entered her favorite form of conversation with her timid boyfriend and hoped, for her badminton coach's sake, that she had finished playing by now.

"Well-a, Romeo, aren't you-a goin' to flirt back?" Mario laughed as Luigi shook his head rapidly. Daisy was obviously doing enough talking for both of them. "Why-a don't you hang-up then-a?" Luigi shook his head even more fervently. Mario laughed louder. As awkward as it might be for Luigi to have a girlfriend who never held back, he sure enjoyed it.

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"Oh, and that's _my_ fault?" Peach crossed her arms as Bowser accused her for his 'only' getting about 400,000,000 golden bars for the strip of water he had auctioned off.

"Yes!" Bowser exclaimed with a twinkle in his eye. "If you hadn't shown up and distracted me, I could have made Tchital pay more."

"I thought you just said I didn't bother you that much." Peach and Bowser had been talking over empty lunch plates for a good two hours. When she had told him he was hungry and they had gotten lunch, they had fallen into conversation and couldn't seem to climb out. Peach enjoyed Bowser's compliments and humorous personality a little too much and Bowser loved Peach's presence a little too much.

"Well, there's a difference between 'bothering' and 'distracting'."

"Oh, really? What exactly is it?"

Bowser promptly began poking Peach's arm with his claw. "This is bothering. This," Bowser stuffed his face directly next to Peach's, "is distracting".

Peach laughed whole heartedly and brushed hair behind her ear. She smiled at Bowser. It was his grin again, if he kept throwing her those goofy smiles, she would break a jaw by the end of the week. "Y'know," she started, "I _still_ haven't gotten my tour. You were supposed to finish it after lunch, and," she gestured to the plates in front of them still, crumbs still evident from their sandwiches, "that obviously didn't happen."

Bowser raised an eyebrow. "What are you talking about? It's still 'after lunch'. We still have time to tour. Not the whole palace, just the important places."

"Which is every room you've stepped foot in, right?" Peach asked with a half-smile.

Smirking, Bowser answered, "Pretty much". He jumped down from his barstool and offered a claw to Peach. As she accepted, a rush ran through Bowser's arm. Even gloved, Peach's hand left a feeling he couldn't really describe.

Peach jumped down from her own stool, assisted by Bowser's loving claw, and she brushed out her skirt. "Alright, where to?"

Bowser grinned. If Peach kept acting this happy, he was sure his cheeks would burst. "Just follow me, highness."

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After a few good hours of touring, Bowser parked his Bowserkart. He had grabbed one as soon as he saw one- walking through stone halls in high-heels for hours straight wasn't something the KoopaKing wanted Peach to endure. Bowser turned to face Peach. "I think it's about dinner-time, but we have a lot to do. Want to just pick up something from the center-west snack hall on the way up?"

Peach perked an eyebrow. "You have a hall just for snacks? What else do you have here, a McGoomba's?"

"Yeah, do you want that instead?" Bowser asked, completely seriously.

"Wait, whoa, you really have a McGoomba's? In your palace?"

Bowser nodded. "Of course we do. We have a _mall_ here, Peach. You name it, we've got it."

Peach smiled. "Hmm, do you have…a petting zoo?"

Bowser nodded.

"A concert hall?"

Bowser looked up, as if searching his brain. "Two halls, three auditoriums, and two dinner-and-a-show rooms."

"A theme-park?"

"Well, we have a roller-coaster, does that count?"

Peach looked at Bowser in shock. "How big is this place, exactly?"

Bowser placed his chin in his claw and rested his elbow on the steering wheel. "Let's just say I haven't been able to finish walking through it yet and I've been here since birth. But there's one room I definitely want you to see before tonight's over."

Peach was still in a slight state of shock. It had finally dawned on her as Bowser was talking to her that almost every time she was kidnapped, she was taken to a different castle. As Bowser had said in his explanation video, Mario seemed to blow up his castles a lot. Having a palace like VolcanoPalace _and_ dozens of castles that just get blown up was, regardless of how punny it sounded, mind-blowing.

"How do you afford it all, Bowser? The palace, the castles, everything you keep telling me about…how in the world do you afford it all?"

Bowser beamed and lifted his head as he answered. "It's part of how brilliant my empire is. You saw just one example of it today, when Tchital bought that land.

"What you saw was a Robin-Hood type thing. I thought it up. That's why it works. Someone has a problem with something, finds something new, or something else happens and there's an argument over it. So I claim it. Poof, argument over. Now, most of the time, people still want it. In this case it was provinces wanting more territory. Usually it's the yuppy individuals who buy the stuff. They spend lots of money to buy it, give the government the lots of money, and we use it for things we need."

Peach crossed her arms. "Things you need like roller-coasters, or things you need like new roads?"

"Both. Whatever I say is best, because usually what I say _is_ best."

Peach laughed. "You are so conceited, you know that?"

Bowser grinned as he gripped the steering-wheel. "Only because I have a lot to be conceited about. And you do know the only reason you're getting away with saying that is because I'm letting you, right?"

As the Bowserkart lurched forward towards the McGoomba's, Peach answered "Yeah. And I wouldn't have it any other way." It was the truth- although she felt kind of guilty for it, Peach loved the attention and affection her love-struck arch-enemy never stopped giving.

Finally they arrived. Bowser and Peach climbed out of the Bowserkart and walked over to the window. The menu was splayed all over the walls and Peach noticed that, besides the currency, it was the same as it was in the Mushroom Kingdom. "Do you know what you want, Princess?"

"Yeah, I do." Peach stepped up to the goomba wearing a visor. "I'd like a number 2, please." The goomba nodded and Bowser stepped up, putting his claw on Peach's shoulder again. This time she didn't shudder, but she did try and ignore the pleasant warmth that spread from his touch.

"Peach is with me." Bowser was silent for a second, letting the thought resonate beautifully in his head. "And I'd like a number three with extra sauce."

The goomba smiled and, within seconds, their meal arrived on a red platter. Bowser took the food and put it on one of the tables for them to sit at. "We don't have to pay because _I'm_ King Bowser."

Peach hungrily took out her meal, a large burger and fries with a soda. She glanced at Bowser, taking his larger version of her own meal out. "Were you surprised I didn't buy a salad or something?"

Bowser bit into his burger, elbows propped on the table. Through his burger, he asked, "why?" Apparently, fast-food meant he didn't need to have any of the manners he had tried so hard to have the previous night.

Peach shrugged and bit voraciously into her own burger. After swallowing, she explained, "Most people are surprised I don't eat 'princess food' everyday."

Bowser shook a fry at Peach as he replied, "That would get really boring. And besides, why would someone ask to go to McGoomba's if they wanted to eat healthy?"

Peach laughed in agreement. "Exactly what I was thinking." She smiled as she ate her burger. For a second, she remembered what had been going on the same time the night before. She was enjoying herself a lot more tonight, but it made her feel weird. She was sure being _Fair and Good_ was better than being rude, but was she, Princess Peach, really supposed to be enjoying the company of the king of the Mushroom Kingdom's arch-rival country?

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Ice-cream dripped down Lemmy's face as he bit into his cone, laden with mint-chocolate dessert. Just like the two brothers on either side, Iggy and Larry, when Lemmy bit down the ice-cream sizzled and started to melt. The brothers laughed as they tried to eat their treats without them melting or getting a brain-freeze.

Face covered in melting green ice-cream, Iggy raised his claws triumphantly. "I won! I beat you both! I beat you both _bad_!" He hollered in glee. Larry took his final bite and snarled at Iggy.

Hurridly trying to keep up with his brothers, Lemmy chomped as fast as he could, finally finishing. "I'm done!" He called in excitement. "I finished too! I finished- ow, ow, ow, brain freeze!" Lemmy's claws gripped his skull as he rocked back and forth, hissing in the sudden cold.

Larry laughed and grinned. "If you could blow fire properly, you wouldn't _ever_ get brain-freezes, Lemmy."

Iggy sucked the rest of the sticky ice-cream off his finger, a resounding _pop!_ sounding before he spoke. "He did better than last time." Iggy grinned as he added, "But I still won!"

Larry stuck his tongue out at Iggy while Lemmy recovered. Changing the subject, he asked, "So whatchu guys think Daddy's doing with Mama Peach?"

Iggy grinned. "Well, I think my shrink-session work wonders, so they're probably out enjoying themselves."

"What's a shrink? Isn't that when you make things really little? Like your shrink-ray, Lar."

Larry shook his head. "Naw, it's different. The shrink Iggy's talking about is a psychiatrist. They make people figure out their problems. But Iggy's just being full of himself; he didn't do any good."

Iggy scoffed. "Sure I did! I did more good than you could have."

Larry raised an eyebrow, staring down his elder brother. "That's what you think. I could do _way_ more to make them get together within the week than you could."

Iggy folded his arms and looked down at Larry from over his glasses. "How much you wanna bet?"

Roy walked in and shouted, "Who bettin' on what? I want in." He sauntered over to the trio and saw Lemmy start to get out of his chair to run. Roy stopped him. "Lem, game's over. We tied, remember? So who bettin'?"

Larry looked over at his brother and answered for the trio. "Iggy thinks he can be a better cupid than I can for Mama Peach and Dad."

Roy's eyebrows raised and he nodded, thinking. "Y'know, we ked get the whole gang inter this and have one big pot. Whatchu think?"

Larry folded his arms. "I think I'd win, that's what I think. And Lemmy's on my side."

Iggy glanced over at Larry. "I'm fine with that. You two won't even be able to do _half_ as much as me anyway. You're on."

Roy grinned. "I'll get de others in on dis."

Now it was Ludwig's turn to walk into the conversation. "Others into what, Roy?"

Roy groaned. Of course, the only sibling that would be whole-heartedly against the plan would be the one to walk in on their planning. Sighing, he answered honestly, "We're setting up a betting pool."

Ludwig walked over, glancing between the three suspiciously. Larry had plastered his hand over Lemmy's mouth, knowing that Lemmy would be more than willing to spill to Ludwig unneeded details. "A betting pool for what, may I inquire?"

"Er, just friendly bet between the siblings," Iggy suggested.

Ludwig folded his arms and glared at his brothers. "I'm a sibling. I am entitled to know the purpose of this bet if it is, as you suggest, just a friendly bet. _What are you up to?_"

Larry tried to look innocent (or as innocent as he could with his claws forcibly over Lemmy's mouth) as he replied, "We're not up to anything, Ludwig!"

Ludwig narrowed his eyes. "I want to hear it from Lemmy."

Larry reluctantly lifted his hand, and Lemmy shouted ecstatically, "We're betting on who can get Mama Peach and King Dad together!"

Larry slapped his hand to his forehead and Ludwig gasped. "You can't do that," he growled, "it's off-base! It's not your business! It's absolutely uncalled for! Father and Mother Peach's relationship is _their_ dealings, not ours. We cannot dapple in the affairs of others, and especially not for some pocket change! Hearts are not things to be bet on, I'm ashamed to even call you all my siblings!"

Roy snarled at Ludwig. "Then you dun hafta bet. _Everyone else_ will put up hundreds of dollas in cash on peeps of their choice, leavin' a few the obvious, butchu don't hafta be a part of it. You can go on, ranting 'bout whatever it is you was ranting about while we make piles o' cash."

Ludwig blinked slowly. When his eyes opened, the seemed to see things with a new light. "I…I still don't approve of this in the smallest amount. But…I'll keep mum about it."

Roy smiled. "'ts all I ask."

"And…" Ludwig played with his claws in self-guilt. "I'll toss in a few chips. For entertainment purposes only, I still don't condone this sort of activity at all, and don't forget that!"

Roy's smile broke into a grin. "Even bettah."

xxxx0o0o0o0o0o0o0xxxx

"Bowser, would you slow down?" Peach laughed as she tried to run after the Koopa King scaling a huge spiral staircase. After touring a bit more once dinner was over, Bowser had stopped abruptly and told her to follow him up a seemingly never-ending staircase.

Bowser laughed as he turned to face the out-of-breath princess. "Maybe you just need to go faster," he told her with a grin, "or let me escort you like I suggested."

Peach caught up with him and thrust her hands on her hips, trying to frown and look threatening as she hollered, "suggested? You practically yanked me up those few stairs!" Bowser's contagious grin broke through Peach's attempt in anger and she ended up giggling. The situation wasn't really funny to her, so she didn't know why she was laughing. As soon as Bowser had noticed Peach lagging up the stairs, he had gripped her hand and pulled her along. Peach didn't remove her hand from his for quite some time, actually. It was as if she forgot, yet again, that she didn't _really_ like Bowser.

Bowser glanced up the stairs and spun around to face Peach again. "Well hurry up this time, or we'll miss it!"

"Miss what?" Peach asked, but Bowser was already racing up the stairs, taking the steps two at a time. Peach bent down and removed her pink heels, chasing after him with her gloved hands clutching her dress and her shoes together. "Bowser! What will we miss?"

Finally, after a while more of running, Bowser abruptly stopped, Peach almost running straight into his spiked shell. Bowser stepped slowly into the room they had arrived at and lit the torches, lighting up the room. Gleaming stones shone at them from the walls. A bench, white with a lush red padding, sat in the center of the room, and faced a window, sheathed with the same red fabric.

Bowser smiled and walked back to Peach, offering his claw to her. Peach folded her arms and arched an eyebrow, surely telling him _you don't seriously think I'd let you this time, did you?_ Bowser tried to smile as he shrugged, but his frown showed through. He gestured toward the bench and Peach sat herself down as Bowser walked to the window, drawing back the curtains.

Peach gasped. They were obviously near the top of the volcano, as she could see for miles and miles. Lights dotted the land and she could just barely make out the mountains. Streetlights shone down on rivers passing under bridges, all sorts of vehicles moving over them. Other rivers, rivers of lava, Peach presumed, lit themselves and the areas around them. "Bowser…it's stunning…"

Bowser faced Peach and saw her. With the torch light, she looked so radiant, so beautiful…True, her hair was ragged and caught in her earrings and she had just a bit of ketchup on the side of her mouth, but she was gorgeous all the same. "Yeah…I know."

Peach looked over at Bowser and blushed slightly, realizing they weren't talking about the same thing. "The-the landscape, I mean. The city." Bowser looked out the window and grinned.

"Yeah, it is. It always is. But that's not what I wanted you to see. What I wanted you to see only happens once a year. My mother used to tell me it was an early birthday present for me." Bowser sat next to Peach on the bench and pointed towards the mountain, the faint remainder of the sunset outlining their tops. "Watch the horizon."

After a few moments of silence, a rainbow of color shot out from behind the mountains. The sky was soon lit with shades of green, yellow, and blue; waving and gliding through the sky, as if gentle waves on the sea. If Peach had been watching the people on the ground, she would have seen them all stop their commotion and watch the sky, craning their necks to see the colors weaving through the smog. If she had been watching Bowser, she would have seen his eyes glued to her own, reveling in her joy and thrill in the miraculous sight. But no, she was watching the sky, mesmerized by the lights.

Making their way through the sky, the lights twinkled and glided. They seemed to dance, some spots the dark grey sky simply tinted, at other places, bright primaries. They shone brightly, the ground below reflecting just so softly and subtly so that the illusion of a fantasy world was held throughout the entire landscape. The white stones lining the walls of the observatory Peach and Bowser were in flashed multi-colors, shining and sparkling, almost as many colors dancing along the walls as were dancing through the sky.

The lights in the sky moved and flowed, slowly changing to darker and darker shades, purple and reds slowly becoming stronger in the illusion. Silently, slowly, and as god-like as it had come, the colors faded into oblivion for another year.

Answering her unspoken question, Bowser said, "Larry says it has something to do with the smog, the lava, our location on the globe, and the moonlight reflecting off the ocean. No one really knows, no one really cares. We just use it as our half hour of peace, silence, and mystery. We have the best view in this room, better than anyone else in the empire. Anyone in the entire world, actually."

Peach was silent for a moment, slowly looking towards the ground again, where the citizens had once again begun moving. "Why haven't I heard of that…thing…before?"

Bowser grinned. "Same reason you don't really know where you are. It's our secret and we don't plan on telling you." Bowser's grin melted into a smile as he bent slightly, his hand finding rest on the other side of Peach, careful not to touch her with his arm. "But I wanted you to see it."

Peach looked into Bowser's eyes and saw something so wonderful, so honest; she just wanted to stare at them for awhile. That is, until she remembered whose eyes were radiating that love that she desired so strongly. Bowser's eyes, not Mario's.

She tore her eyes from his and looked out the window again. The sky was now completely dark with no sign day had ever shone on its clouds, let alone the mysterious light-show. "I liked that," she murmured, the double-meaning pounding on her skull.

Bowser grinned, tempted, oh so tempted, to grab her into his arms and cover her in kisses. "I had hoped you would." Bowser allowed himself to lean forward just-so slightly, his arm now touching Peach's back.

Silently, Peach stared out the window. Feeling warmth along her back, Peach realized Bowser was trying to discreetly touch her. Purposely overlooking his purpose, she used his arm as a backrest. Peach leaned back and watched the land outside the window again.

Bowser, pushing his luck, snaked his hand up onto Peach's thigh, encircling her in him. Gingerly, Peach lifted his claw off her thigh and back onto the bench. She'd let herself lean against him, but that was as far as she'd let him go. _I shouldn't even be going _that_ far…_ she chastised herself.

They sat together for a few moments longer, admiring Bowser's country, until Peach yawned. Bowser reluctantly stood up and offered his claw to her. "Come on, I'll show you to your room." He didn't expect what happened next- Peach accepted the claw and used it to pull herself up.

Bowser led Peach back down the stairs, Peach's eyelids growing heavy as Bowser told her something she wasn't really listening to. Guiltily, Peach realized she was enjoying having her gloved hand encircled in Bowser's warm one, feeling him rub his thumb-claw along the crook between her thumb and index finger. She dug her hand just a bit more into his scaly hand as a tingle ran through her spine for reasons she didn't want to imagine.

Bowser eventually stopped mumbling, grinning like a fool as he felt Peach's touch, imagining how her hand would feel ungloved. He longed to feel them- being gloved so much; they must be very supple and sweet, unlike his scaly, dry hands.

Scaly and dry as they might be, the radiated that same strange warmth that seemed to run through Bowser's entire body, and Peach felt at ease with her hand encircled by them. Finally they arrived at the foot of the stairs and Bowser led Peach to the KoopaKar, slowly, painfully, removing his claw from her hand. He sighed as she placed both hands in her lap and tried to blink back sleep. Although Bowser suspected she was only letting him lead her down the stairs because she was too tired to do it herself, his wishful thinking kept a grin on his face as he drove down a few choice halls.

They arrived at Peach's room and Bowser stepped out. Peach lifted herself out, much to Bowser's disappointment. The king opened the door for Peach, lights flickering on automatically. Peach stepped into her doorway and smiled at Bowser politely.

"Peach…thank you."

"For what?"

Bowser smiled slowly. "For giving me one of the best days in my life. I…I think you've made up for it."

Peach furrowed her brow. "Made up for what?"

Bowser shuffled his feet as he continued holding the door open. He had suppressed the memory all day; it hurt him to bring it back to the surface after such a dream-like day. "For yesterday."

Peach was silent as she tried to recall yesterday and then let loose a loud "oooh" followed by a short laugh. Her casual feelings about the matter stung Bowser, causing him to frown as she smiled. "You helped me forget about yesterday. Thank you. And I really liked those lights."

Bowser smiled, feeling her breath just so slightly on his skin. "I did too." He stared at Peach, looking into her eyes. He loved her so much, it made him ecstatic to be so close, and he was surprised he wasn't yet short of breath. She made the mighty monster he was melt into a whimpering puppy from just a single smile. "Goodnight, my princess." Peach returned the polite salutation and Bowser closed the door.

Maybe Peach being here wasn't so bad.

* * *

**Author's Note: **Have I told you how crazy it is to have so many reviews? I never thought I'd get past 20, honestly! You all are so amazing to me, I don't lie when I say that you keep me going, make my friends jelous, and give me major ego boosts. ;) I love writing this story for me, I've been doing so from the start, but even more I love writing it for you all because it is such a joy and pleasure to know I am, even in the smallest amount, pleasing the wonderful people who make my day and give me grins a mile wide.

And oh, look at that, I swore I wasn't going to fawn on you all until next chapter! Speaking of which, next chapter is kind of funky. Its the entry into a great scene that I was -planning- on fitting into next chapter, but I'm not sure if it'll fit. I will be adding a snippet inwhich I have cameos, though, as another way of thanking you. Because as long as my crazy ANs are, I still can't fit in enough thanks. :P

Right. Until next chapter! Razzi


	12. Lost and Confused

**Foreword: **Dear me, I haven't updated in forever, and I'm not even completely happy with this chapter! What a disappointment, you all have my sore apologies.

I'm not completely happy because these seem to be drabbles with no connection. I just recently rearranged the order of these things, so I hope its a bit better. And also, a note to you, my dear readers!

This is the chapter to celebrate 100 reviews+! I have a cameo section with a good deal more than one cameo. ;) One cameo is Mary, the name of a character in Miss Lia's story, "Rebirth of a Star". Everyone else is named after their...namesake. :) I wish I could have fit you all in there, but I couldn't...I love and need you all though, so thank you! And I hope you enjoy the chapter regardless.

**Disclaimer:** Nintendo doesn't get everything this time! Cameo characters property of their namesake, plzkthx

* * *

Peach woke up, finding her silken pillow damp with tears. She sat up and put her hand to her head, moving her hand through her bed-head as she tried to remember why she had been crying. Oh yeah.

Through the night, Peach had been constantly pestered by horrid dreams. In actuality, she loved the dreams; for the first half of the night, at least. They had been filled with feelings of love, laughter, family, and the touch of another. But somewhere through the course of the night, Peach began to get a hold of her dreams and her feelings. She realized the man offering her so much love was not the one she should be dreaming about. The man who she was ecstatic to be dreaming about was the one she was _supposed_ to be having nightmares about.

The rest of the night she had been restlessly sleeping, apparently crying, as she knew her dreams were guilty dreams, ones she shouldn't be dreaming of, but enjoying them and desiring them too much to wake herself up.

Peach swung her legs over the side of the bed and frowned. She rubbed her crusty eyes, the eyes of one who cries without admitting it, and stood up. She carried herself to the floor-length mirror, torches on either side, and grimaced. She was not beautiful; not even presentable. She looked as if she had been swallowed and spit out, not only because of her morning appearance. Her face was lank and frowning, her eyes dark and mournful. Peach was miserable, and it wasn't only because she was making herself feel miserable.

She lifted her chin and sniffed loudly, feeling a fresh tear trickle down the side of her face. She deserved to feel miserable. She had been enjoying herself and wanting more of something forbidden. Something she knew she could never have, whether it was because the _right_ man wouldn't give it, or because the only one who would was wrong. It was something that made her giddy by day and sob by night.

She had been a traitor last night.

And oh, how she wanted to be a traitor again.

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Ludwig was arguing with Morton, Ludwig keeping his cool and using educated rebuttals and insults while Morton was in hysterics, repeating himself in a futile attempt to understand Ludwig's insults. Finally, Morton snarled, "You're just a big, stupid, giant, show-off!"

Ludwig was taken aback. "A show-off? What on earth are you implying?"

A grin spread across Morton's face as he noticed the smirk leave Ludwig's. "You're a show-off! A big, fat, stupid, show-off, with your big, stupid, big words!"

Ludwig gasped, and spun around on his heels to face his father, engulfed in a rather large breakfast sandwich. "Father! Do you think me a pedant?"

Bowser stopped chewing and raised an eyebrow. He had droned out the argument, and scanned Ludwig's face for any sign of what "pedant" meant. He could tell it upset Ludwig, and Ludwig was rarely upset. "You…tell me," he cautiously ordered.

Ludwig crossed his arms, furrowing his bushy eyebrows. "I most certainly do not think I'm a pedant, not at all. Just simply better educated! I am _not_ a pedant."

Bowser took his sandwich and shook it at Ludwig, a piece of lettuce falling out from doing so. "Not many people go around insulting themselves. Maybe you _are_ a pedant and you just don't want to think about it." Bowser took another bite and proudly declared, "I, for one, know _I_ am not a pedant."

Ludwig glared at his father, choosing not to shoot back the reply he had. Instead, he snarled, "So you both think I'm a pedant?"

Morton grinned, bellowing, "Yeah! A big, fat, stupid, pedant!"

"You know what?" Ludwig shouted, "I'm going to abscond from this horrible, degrading atmosphere, and work on my musical auto-biography! And in case you cared, this next movement is completely in minor!" Cursing and hollering words he figured his father and his brother didn't know anyway, Ludwig stormed off.

From the corner of his mouth, Bowser asked if Morton knew what "pedant" was. Morton shrugged and Bowser chuckled. "Neither do I. But if it's an insult, I know I'm _still_ not one."

Ludwig stormed into his room and grabbed his "musical autobiography". It was a rather thick packet of music sheets, most of it illegible and in very informal musical format, as they were all spur of the moment, sometimes almost "diary" entries. Sometimes in happier, major tones, others just rantings-turned-song. Today was certainly a ranting day. He marched off with it into a nearby bedroom, as his was due to be cleaned that day.

Ink spattered around as Ludwig furiously began filling the staves with notes and chords. He shouted his feelings out loud; his head overflowing as he mentally played the music he was writing. He cursed, complained, growled, snarled, and accidentally punched quite a few holes through his composition.

Soon, he found himself not ranting anymore and grinned. He had struck gold. Ludwig pushed the music aside and began writing on a clean, new sheet, filling in annotations of entrances, chords, and dynamics. Diminuendos, crescendos, solos, and all sorts of embellishments dotted the sheet as he composed, loving the thrill of a new stave, key changes, time signatures, and instruments. A descending scale gave his piece a wonderful entrance to a brand new section, and he composed for so long, he lost track of time.

Ludwig's face was so fixed in a grin, he looked almost eccentric. Ink was spattered everywhere, even on his teeth, but he didn't seem to mind. His hair was erratic, his eyes darting from measure to measure as he willed his quill to keep up with the symphony in his head. Ludwig dramatically added chord after chord, spectacular rests, and fermatas as he grew to the finale. Finally, the composer finished his piece, and leaned back, grinning at his work of brilliance. The first stage in many to creating a spectacular symphony was complete, and Ludwig hoped it would be legible enough to continue work.

The door squeaked open and a maid gasped, dropping her cleaning utensils. The maid shook her head as she saw what Ludwig had done. She glared at the koopaling and sternly reprimanded, "Ludwig Von Koopa! Those were my best linens!"

xxxx0o0o0o0o0o0o0xxxx

Enwrapped in a trench coat, Roy leaned against the wall, grinning. He looked out the corner of his eye and saw his sister sauntering down the hall. Her eyes were clenched shut as she silently danced along to some music only she could hear, mouthing quite ridiculously along as she walked. While she passed, Roy stuck out his claw and pulled a long black cord from her ears. Wendy's face fell, and as she realized what had happened, she spun on her heels to face Roy. "What the heck was that for?"

Roy grinned, letting the cord fall, music just barely easing out of the headphones at the end. "Whatchu' listnen' to, Wen?"

Wendy O. scowled while she grabbed the cord and paused her song. "That's, like, none of your business. What the heck didju take it out for anyway?"

Roy stepped off the wall and raised an eyebrow. "You interested in some cold-hard cash?"

Wendy crossed her arms, the cord just hanging down from between her claws. "Roy, if you haven't noticed, we're like the richest koopas, like, ever. I don't _need_ anymore cash…why?"

Roy grinned again. "The boys and I have a nice li'l bettin' pool set up I thought you might want in on." Wendy glared at Roy, but the smooth-talker kept going. "The topic at hand is sumpin…I tink you may wanna look inter."

Wendy tried to mask her curiosity behind a scowl. "What's this…topic you're betting on?"

Roy stopped grinning, glancing at his hands as casually as I could. "We jus' bettin' ter see who kin make Peach and Pops get tagether fastest this week."

Wendy's eyebrow lifted. "Like a cupid-contest?"

"You ked call it that." Wendy squealed in delight, jumping up and down and clapping her claws. Roy glared at her, clenching his own claws to his ears. "'Ey! Crazy lady! You tryin' to make me go deaf or sumpin'?"

Quickly regaining her composure, Wendy scowled at Roy. "No, I was just excited."

Roy rolled his eyes. "I could see dat." He opened his jacket to reveal a complicated chart with names and bets. "So you in?"

Wendy smiled. "Better. I'm competing."

Roy smiled. "Thought chu'd be." He took a notebook out of a pocket in his jacket's innards and handed it to Wendy. Eagerly, she filled in the needed information and handed it back. "Tanks. Dis should be good."

Wendy smiled again, clasping her claws together. She squealed in reply and ran down the hall. Roy shook his head after her, not even trying to understand the bipolar attitude of girls.

xxxx0o0o0o0o0o0o0xxxx

All through breakfast, Bowser's mind was racing. After breakfast, it was racing even more. He knew that Peach hadn't left her room since she entered it the night before, and so he had sent Valkoopy in with breakfast almost an hour ago.

Finally, Valkoopy wheeled her empty cart out of Peach's room and down the hall, almost being run over by Bowser. It was obvious his mask of calmness was down. Frantically, he demanded, "How is she? Did she eat? How's she feeling? What's going on?"

"Calm down, your majesty! One question at a time is the best I can do for you, but I'm afraid I won't be that much of a help."

"Why? I sent you in there to help her help me!"

"She wasn't feeling top-notch, sire, and wasn't willing to talk about it. She seemed miserable."

Bowser's eyes bulged. "Why was she miserable?"

Valkoopy tried not to laugh. Bowser always inspired so much revered fear in his maids and workers, that such a fearful king seemed bizarre. "I don't know, sire, she wasn't talking."

Bowser growled, "Well if you weren't _talking_ to her, then why were you there so long?"

"You told me to make sure she ate her breakfast. She wasn't eating until I told her I wouldn't leave unless she did. Something's tormenting her, sire, and I don't think sitting in her room is going to do her much good."

"What do you mean?"

Valkoopy patiently explained, "Whatever is wrong with her is distracting her from everything else and she's just sitting there, feeling sorry for herself. If you get her involved in something new and interesting, she may forget whatever's bothering her."

"What's bothering her?

Valkoopy sighed, adjusting the dirtied plates on the cart. "Sire, if I knew, I'd tell you. But as I've said, she wasn't talking to me."

Bowser glared, snarling, "Then why didn't _you_ talk to _her_?"

Valkoopy shook her head. "You don't get it, sire. She's upset. I 'counsel' through guilt. Peach is miserable right now, I think my silent comfort did a lot more than any talking could. You need to get that through your head, sire, especially if you ever try to pursue a relationship with _anyone_. Silence can heal more than words, especially if you aren't good with words in the first place."

Bowser frowned, looking away from Valkoopy. He sighed before saying, "Then what should I do for her?"

"I don't know, sire, I'm not the best of counselors. All I can be is a friend. Now if you'll most graciously excuse me…" Valkoopy carted the dishes away, leaving Bowser alone in the hallway.

Bowser glanced towards Peach's door. Cautiously, slowly, he inched towards it, pressing his ear against the door. Most doors in the palace were soundproof, but not the guest bedrooms. Bowser heard water hitting the bathroom floor and realized Peach must be having a shower.

He froze. Standing stock still, perverted, love-struck thoughts started flashing through his mind. The splash of the water dulled and Bowser realized Peach must have stepped into the shower. His head hurt from a storm of thoughts.

Soon, Bowser was sweating. He shook himself and cursed himself, leaving the hall as fast as he could. Bower knew it wasn't Peach's personality to ever appreciate _anyone_ having such thoughts about her and that she would go ballistic if he ever mentioned it to her. As Bowser moved through the hallway, he desperately tried to remember his recent conversation and get his mind off…other things.

He planned, best he could, what he should do for Peach. But even once his mind was clear to focus on simply helping her, Bowser was dumbstruck. He turned down a few halls and stepped up to an intercom system hanging on a wall. After finding the desired button, he said into the machine, "Kammy? I need your help."

Within a few seconds, a puff of sparkling smoke appeared and Kammy stepped out. "Yes your majesty?"

"I need help with Peach."

Kammy rolled her eyes and crossed her arms. "What do you need my help for?"

"You're a girl."

"What an observation." Kammy sarcastically droned.

Bowser glared, sparks flipping from his mouth as he snarled, "Are you being snarky with me, Kammy?"

Kammy blinked nervously. She had almost forgotten that Bowser was still…Bowser. With or without Peach. "No sire, not intentionally, sire. I-"

"Just help me, okay?" Bowser stared down Kammy, who sighed before finally nodding. "Good. Valkoopy said I should…distract her. Because she's upset. I don't know why she's upset, but whatever it is, we need to distract her. What should I do?"

"Distract her, maybe?" Kammy seethed under her breath. She looked up brightly at her king and pulled a rather fake grin. "Perhaps get her out of the palace. Take her somewhere she hasn't seen; show her something to get her mind off things. Bring your kids- they'll like it and she likes them, so it works well."

Bowser grinned. He lifted Kammy up and pulled her into a hug. "That's a great idea!"

Rather surprised at Bowser's out-of-character act, Kammy couldn't suppress an "oof" as she was squeezed, dropping her wand. For a few seconds, she let herself enjoy the welcome hug, the first she had ever received from her king, before loosening her grip and allowing herself to be let down. Adjusting her horn-rimmed glasses, she said quietly, "You're welcome, sire. I'm glad it pleased you."

Bowser grinned again, showing off his fangs. "Anything that pleases Peach pleases me."

Kammy stiffened. "Of course," She walked over and picked up her wand, waving it so a door formed, leading her to her room via instantaneous transportation. "Now if you'll excuse me…" Kammy opened the door and stepped through, the door disappearing instantly as it swung shut behind her.

xxxx0o0o0o0o0o0o0xxxx

Mario followed his brother as they zoomed up a pipe, landing squarely in a room with a night-club like atmosphere. All around them, fellow plumbing-convention goers leapt out of pipes of their own. Koopas, toads, goombas, even some humans and unrecognizable creatures followed each other out, most finding seats.

Luigi rubbed the back of his neck as he saw everyone rush to places; they all obviously knew where to go. "Mario, do you-a know what to do?"

Mario glanced about and shook his head. "But they-a said we'd have-a fun here. I'm-a hungry. Think they've-a got pasta?"

A rather tall woman approached the brothers. Upon further examination, they realized she was a magikoopa, but in a simple red dress and without glasses, she looked nothing like the magikoopas they knew. The magikoopa folded her arms and smirked. "You boys been here before?" Both brothers shook their heads, examining the lady. Her name tag, reading "Seena", gave away her occupation to them both, and they could tell she was experienced at whatever it was she did. "I didn't think so. You from the plumbing convention?" The brothers nodded, prompting her to continue.

"Not much of talkers, are ya? Well the convention comes here, to good ole' Blastos' X and 4, every year about this time of the week. I'm gonna be really busy all night, but I'll try and check on ya both. Until then…" Seena called a name out and a koopa rushed to her side, proudly sporting simple jeans and a T-shirt. "This is Mikari. She's been coming here on the plumbing convention day every day for _years_. Sweet girl, she should be thrilled to show you around."

Mikari grinned and shook each hand in turn, asking their names politely. Seena smiled and waved as she left to assist a lost-looking toad. "So," Mikari started, "You two are plumbers?" The brothers nodded yet again. "I'm actually not, but I live near here. I'll show you two around. You boys hungry?" Once again, all they did was nod. "Spiny got your tounges? Come on boys, you can't have come to a place like Blastos' to go the night without talking."

"Sorry," they mumbled, making Mikari laugh.

"Well maybe your tounges'll loosen up over some dinner. Whatchu guys like? They have some of the best frozen pizza, and melted ice-cream is half-off today!"

"Just Pasta," they both answered in excitement. Mario grinned at Luigi when Mikari sighed. "They have that too, but it's boring." He was hungry enough to eat the entire place, so Mario didn't really care. They followed Mikari over to a large window where one bought food and ordered pasta.

Spotting a brown-haired human drinking alone, Mikari rushed over, sitting next to her. "Hey Mary! These guys are rookies on the scene; wanna help me warm them up?"

The girl looked over her drink, still sipping from the straw, until it finally screeched with the 'empty' noise. She smiled, and shook their hands. "I'd love to. I'm Mary, what are you guys' names?" Strangely, the girl looked quite a bit like Mario. Without the mustache, of course. She even had overalls on.

Mario and Luigi answered politely, Luigi cupping his hand and saying out of the side of his mouth, "Quanta gente dovremo venire a contatto? (_How many more people will we have to meet_)"

Mario was about to shrug when Mary interrupted. "Oh, probably one or two more. The sooner you loosen up and enjoy yourselves, the sooner we can have fun!" Mary laughed at their shock and explained, "My assistant, Miss Lia, taught me some Italian. So you boys are Italian?"

Soon they were all talking, Mary, Mikari, Mario, and Luigi. They had moved from the discussion of Italian language, to favorite vacation spots, to holidays, to chocolate preferences, to allergies, to pets, to Yoshis, and were talking about one of Mario's latest adventures when Seena came up to them again.

She smiled. "I see you boys loosened up, that's great. Are you up for some classic gambling, Blastos' style? Blastos is supposed to award the winner the prize in person."

The girls all brightened, clearly either thrilled by the idea of gambling or meeting Blastos, the namesake for the night-club. Luigi grinned, saying, "I'd-a go for a good-a game of cards."

The girls all instantly began betting on Luigi, not even knowing who he'd go against. Finally he arrived, Mario following along with Mikari, Mary, and Seena. A rather large and robust-looking penguin began smirking at Luigi. The penguin was flocked on either side by two boos, each hovering near piles of chips. "So, are you mah competition then?" the penguin said, its voice crisp and a bit nerve-racking.

Seena leaned over and whispered in Luigi's ear, loud enough for Mario to hear, "They call that penguin over there "Mystical Tears". Mystical because no one ever sees her moves coming. Tears because she always wins with great expense to the other player. But you can beat her."

Luigi smiled. He didn't brag often, but he hardly ever lost a game of luck when he was trying. "Si, I'm-a your competition. But don't-a worry, I won't-a make you look-a _too_ bad."

Within minutes the game was underway, bets being made all around the table. Kitty boos passed out drinks to the spectators, and Mario found himself a great seat to watch his brother wipe the over-confident smile off the penguin's face. "He's-a gonna win."

"Who? Green man?" the goomba sitting next to him asked.

Mario nodded. "He's-a my brother. Luigi."

The toad on the other side of Mario squealed. "You guys are brothers? That's so cool! I bet you're both popular at home."

Mario shrugged, smiling a bit. "Well-a, we are the famous Mario and Luigi. So-a, you could-a say that."

The toad and goomba gasped, the toad fervently shaking his hand, the goomba obviously upset she couldn't. "My name's Casiana, and that's my friend, Kari." The toad told him, readjusting her mushroom cap, dotted with blue specks. "I'm a big fan, Mario! Wow, never thought I'd say that. What are you doing here anyway?"

"We're here for-a plumbing convention-a."

Kari smiled. "Did you know there was a night-club deal with it?"

Mario shook his head. "Luigi and I are-a not much-a party people."

"Oh come on, Mario Parties are the biggest things, like, ever!" Casiana laughed.

Mario laughed. "I-a meant night-a clubs."

"Well, Blastos' is a great place, I don't even consider it a club. More like…a community. Great place, I met half my friends here," Kari told Mario. "So what _do_ you do at home?"

It didn't take much else for Mario to branch into more of his stories. Casiana and Kari listened intensely while Luigi gambled away, 'Mystical Tears' slowly loosing the smile on her face. Finally, the game was called with Luigi as the winner.

A large black, cat-like creature stepped forward to shake Luigi's hand. "Congratulations," it said politely, careful not to scratch his glove, "you've beaten one of our best competitors."

Mystical Tears nodded. "You not bad, not bad t'all. You comin' back?"

Luigi shrugged. "I-a need to-a call my girlfriend."

The cat smiled. "You certainly do. Here's your winnings, Luigi. Congratulations again, from one talented fellow to another. Call me Blastos."

"Graci, Blastos," Luigi stammered, staring at the pile of winnings.

After more compliments and more talking, Mario and Luigi left the party. None of their new friends, Mikari, Mary, Kari, Casiana, Seena, or even Mystical Tears and Blastos were happy to see them go, but Mario and Luigi were too tired to even think of staying longer. When they arrived at their room, Mario fell onto his bed, letting his hat fall off his head.

"Did you-a have fun?" Luigi asked.

"Si," Mario sighed, "But I can't-a wait to get-a home." Mario thought of the friends he missed, his own bed, and most importantly, the better flavored pasta.

"I-a know. I-a miss Daisy." Luigi said as he fell onto his own bed. He looked over at Mario, picking at his mustache. "Do you-a think Daisy's asleep? I-a want to call her." Without getting an answer, Luigi rolled over and grabbed up his phone, holding down the speed-dial button. As he pressed it, he asked, "Are you-a gonna call Peach?"

Mario shook his head and rolled over again, pressing his face into his sheets. "She's-a on vacation," he told Luigi with a muffled voice.

Luigi shrugged as the phone rang. "She might-a miss you."

Mario sighed. "She's-a on vacation. I-a told you."

Luigi rolled his eyes, waiting for Daisy to pick up. His face brightened when he heard a voice pick-up on the other end and left Mario alone in the room.

Mario rolled over onto his back and picked at his mustache, not sure what else to do. _Next week…I'll figure things out…Next week we'll be back on track._

xxxx0o0o0o0o0o0o0xxxx

Peach finished drying herself off and put on her pink dress. Slowly, thoughtfully, she dressed, thinking quietly to herself. Peach looked at her reflection and did her hair and make-up.

She wasn't planning on going out, or even leaving the room, but Peach knew that when she looked her best, it was easier to feel her best. She knew that if she was confident in her appearance that she would have one less thing to worry about.

As she applied eye-shadow, she started to smile. It was just like a quiet day at her own castle; getting up late, being undisturbed, and yet knowing she was being worried about. Her unofficial days off were becoming more and more rare and she knew at the moment, the castle staff must be worried to bits.

Laughing inwardly, she opened her mouth just a bit to better apply mascara. She was on vacation. There was no need to feel upset, vacation was meant for enjoyment. The matter which she found it didn't and shouldn't matter. What mattered was that she felt confident and happy.

Peach blinked a few times as her eyelashes separated and she grabbed her gloves, pulling them on delicately. Today would only be a good day if she let it be.

Curiously, she thought about Mario. The convention must be boring, sure to be full of meetings, seminars, and workshops. The company must be dull, composed of smelly, overweight plumbers hoping to make their nitch of business. He'd be thrilled to see her again, and he'd have enough miserable stories to keep her occupied, surely.

Her stories…she still wasn't sure if she wanted him to know. Peach stepped into her tiny, pink heels and stepped around the room to the window. She pulled it open and looked out, expecting a dank, dark world of rock and lava. It was a welcome sight to instead see clean city streets with children of all sorts playing and a park nearby. It wasn't a sweatshop or a torture zone, but a regular world, almost like her home.

Standing framed in the window, Peach began to be noticed. Children stopped their playing and pointed. Although the windows were soundproof, Peach felt a blush creeping up her cheeks as she saw- they were _cheering_. Why would Darkland children be cheering for Peach, she didn't know. But it certainly gave her a boost she needed.

Peach started to laugh, thinking of how refreshing her shower really had been. She had almost forgotten when she woke up that everyone in this palace, especially Bowser, adored her. And she enjoyed that.

She was revered yet respected, loved, yet left to herself. She was finally happy to be on vacation.

* * *

**Author's Note:** I'm so sorry you had to wait so long for such an unsatisfactory chapter. Next chapter...ooh I wrote it in one day (a record!) and goodness knows I love it! I think you all will enjoy it as well, so please, review!

I know you've all been waiting much too long, but I've been horribly busy with finals, Christmas, (and the Wii...) and such. So here's to a shorter wait between chappies next time, aye? You all truly deserve a million chapters, I can't imagine a better crew of reviewers and readers. :)


	13. Take a Break

**Foreword:** Ah, my sincere apologies for not updating in forever. I don't even dare look at the last update date. D: Seriously, I was horribly irresponsible. I've been so busy...anyway.

There's fluff in this chapter. I quite enjoy it. :) (took them long enough, aye?)

* * *

A rather intricate chart was scrawled upon a chalkboard, Roy pacing in front of it. "You all know how dis is gonna woik, roight?" His siblings nodded slowly, looking from one to the other. Lemmy's claw shot up.

"I don't."

Roy glared at Lemmy. "You don't?"

Now seeing that they weren't alone, almost all of the other koopalings shook their heads as well.

Roy rolled his eyes. "Whatevah. I'll explain again, dunderheads. Ever'one teams up in ter twos, and ever'team puts in cash. Amounts hafta be met by all teams, or dey forfeit. In de end, da one who made Mama Peach an' Pops fall in love da most gets da jackpot."

"Who judges?" Larry asked.

Roy grinned. "Me."

The koopalings were outraged. "You can't judge! You'll choose yourself!" "Roy, that's not cool!" "This is an outrage, I demand an unbiased adjudicator!" "Choose Kamek!" "Yeah, Roy, Kamek!"

Roy glared at his siblings. "Why would Kamek be in dis? He wouldn't like it."

"Well, I know _I_ would rather have Kamek judge than someone like you, Dirtbag."

Roy rolled his eyes. "Fine. I'll ask 'im. But don't say I didn't warn ya!" Roy stormed over to the door, starting to pull it open when it swung open on by itself. Roy reeled back in terror and shock as his father stared him down. "Hi..hi…hi…Pops."

The koopalings gasped in shock, stuffing away betting papers and shielding the chalkboard from Bowser's view. The Koopa King looked around the room at his children, attempting to look innocent. He grinned and said, "Tryin' to hide your birthday plans, huh?"

The koopalings sighed in relief and nodded as fast as they could.

Bowser scanned the room again, trying to see exactly what the koopalings were hiding. "You all are going on a picnic with your Mama Peach and me."

The koopalings gasped and almost left their positions of protections to run and hug their father. Roy sat up, trying to keep his cool as he asked if Bowser was serious.

Bowser tried not to smile as he nodded and saw more of his children's reactions. The royal family hadn't gone out together for years, let alone with Peach. Bowser never had "time" to spend with them. Of course, he had time to plan Mario's torture, kidnap Peach, go to war, master every sport he could imagine, and build doomsday machines, but never to spend the afternoon as a family.

"No excuses. I want you all in the CC53 hanger in thirty minutes. Somebody go get Cookoopa, somebody else get Kamek, somebody else get Peach."

"Why don't _you_ get Mama Peach, Papa?" Bowser Jr. asked curiously.

Uncomfortably, Bowser answered, "I don't think she wants to see me right now. By myself. She'll like the picnic, it _is_ my idea, after all." Bowser grinned.

Iggy wrinkled his brow as he asked, "Dad, isn't CC53 broken?"

Bowser glared, seething, "You certainly would know." He continued, saying, "Yeah, but if I want it fixed, it'll get fixed. And I want it fixed."

"Dad, is Kammy coming?"

Bowser shook his head, remembering her brisk attitude earlier. "I don't think she'd want to." Without even saying goodbye, he left, leaving the koopalings talking at a million miles per hour.

xxxx0o0o0o0o0o0o0xxxx

Peach was shuffling through her dresses, music blaring from the radio she had just found, and couldn't hear the eager knocks at her door. She rolled her eyes as the song ended and turned minor again. She wasn't in the mood for anything of that style, but she had no doubt it was the most popular kind. She turned the dial, waiting for another happy song and in-between stations, heard the knocking at her door.

She took a breath and answered it, nearly getting bowled over by Bowser Jr., Larry, and Lemmy. "Mama Peach!" They cheered, Junior shamelessly hugging her around the waist, Larry standing back and grinning. Lemmy ran to her bed and jumped up onto it, swinging his legs as he sat.

"What are you boys doing in here?" Peach laughed, forgetting her depressed attitude she had earlier.

"We're goin' on a picnic, Mama Peach!" Lemmy roared in glee, bounding off the bed to jump on the floor instead. "We're goin' on a picnic with you and King Dad!"

"Are we now?" Peach asked as she pulled against Junior, apparently trying to knock her to the floor. "Says who?"

"Daddy," Larry answered as he looked around Peach's room. "In thirty minutes."

"For how long?" Peach asked. Junior had almost pulled her down when she spun on her heel and smirked at him, causing him to blush and let go.

Lemmy grinned, opened his mouth to answer, and frowned. "I dunno." His face lit up as he continued, "But I hope for a long time! I like Daddy and you."

Peach blushed and smiled. _That does sound like fun…_she thought about the last night she spent with Bowser and almost grinned. _What's the harm of spending an afternoon enjoying myself? There's…nothing wrong with that…not _really_ wrong, that is…_She sighed and Larry saw her frown.

"Mama Peach, you hafta go. You'll have fun, I promise." Suddenly Larry remembered the bets. He smiled suggestively as he added, "and you can get to know Dad better, too."

Peach laughed heartily and smiled. "Alright. Where are we meeting?"

Junior grabbed her hand and pulled toward the door. "I'll show ya, Mama Peach!"

Peach slid her hand out of his grip and shook her head. "We have thirty minutes and I'd like to change."

Larry looked at Peach up and down, wearing one of her almost-identical pink dresses. "I think you look pretty already, Mama Peach."

Peach smiled at the koopaling's honest compliment. "Why thank you, sir. But I'd like to find something different for your d-…picnic."

Lemmy gasped as he remembered the bets and caught Peach's almost-slip-up. "Its cause o' what Larry said, in't it?"

Peach laughed and rolled her eyes, not catching what the koopaling had caught. She ruffled Lemmy's rainbow-mane. "Sure. Now where are we meeting?"

Junior frowned, realizing Lemmy and Larry had just gotten themselves ahead in the 'race'. "I'll show you, Mama Peach. You just finish gettin' dressed, okay? Larry and Lemmy should go leave now."

Larry shrugged, passing Peach with Lemmy following close behind. He hissed, "we're winning" in Junior's ear before the two brothers took off running.

xxxx0o0o0o0o0o0o0xxxx

Bowser paced the hanger floor, watching as Wendy, Morton, and Iggy came through the door, followed by Cookoopa and a team of helpers. He leaned through the open door on the clowncopter and mumbled, "are you almost done?" to the repairman and his crew.

The lead repairman, an even shorter and squatter goomba than most, wiped his sweat off his brow. "Almost, sire. Just a few more fixes and she'll be as good as ever."

Bowser nodded as Cookoopa walked up to him. "So we're goin' on a picnic, I hear? Do ya'll want picnic foods then? Hot dogs, hamburgers, fried chicken, pasta salads, and the like?"

"Sure, if that's what you wanna cook." Bowser answered, waiting eagerly for Peach to show up in the doorway. Instead, Roy, Ludwig, and Kamek appeared, Roy explaining something excitedly to Kamek, with Ludwig looking rather disappointed with him.

Frustrated, Bowser crunched a fly sitting on the ground as he waited for Peach. Finally, he saw Lemmy and Larry. Peach mustn't be far behind, they went to get her! Bowser rushed towards his boys and put his claws firmly on their shoulders. "Where's Peach?"

Larry looked up at his father, trying not to be afraid by the intimidating glare. "She's coming with Junior. She's changing her dress."

Furrowing his bushy eyebrows, Bowser asked, "Why?"

Lemmy shrugged while Larry smiled. "She said she was doing it for you."

Bowser's face brightened exceptionally as he asked, almost choking in glee, "She said that?"

Lemmy hit his brother on the head as he answered, "No, she said she did it for the _picnic_."

Bowser's face moved from glee, to disappointment, to anger within seconds. Sheilding his face with his arms, Larry screeched, "She said our du-picnic! So it coulda been either! Either our dad, or our picnic!" Before waiting for a response, Larry grabbed Lemmy and ran towards his siblings, Bowser's face slowly reshaping back to a smile.

At last, Bowser saw Peach with Junior running slightly ahead. Eagerly, Bowser himself took off towards the princess, ignoring Junior and stood awkwardly in front of her. He knew he shouldn't hug her, but after a few seconds of awkwardness, he did anyway.

Peach "oof"ed in surprise as she was squeezed, Bowser being exceptionally careful not to poke her with his wristbands. Bowser put his claws tenderly on her arms and grinned, Peach catching his contagious grin.

Her heart swelled and she was glad she came. _How can something that makes me so happy be bad? After all, its not like _Bowser's_ making me…I'm going on my own to be happy with…Bowser's kids._

Bowser looked Peach up and down, admiring her dress choice. It was pink, of course, but slightly less poofy and more summer appropriate. She had put her hair half-up, letting part of it trickle down her front. Bowser felt a rush as he touched her hair, feeling its softness without quite stroking it. "I'm really glad you came, the koopalings…and me…were really hoping you would. And you look very beautiful!"

After releasing Peach, he turned to the clowncopter, his family and subjects gathering around it as the repairmen climbed out. "Are you done yet?" he roared. The goomba crew nodded and unlocked the door, everyone climbing and choosing prime seating.

"Bowser, how long will we be picnicking?"

Bowser shrugged, smiling. "Do you have any plans or something?"

Peach laughed and shook her head, smiling as she said, "That's a good point," and climbed in the shot-gun seat.

Smugly, Bowser said, "Of course it is."

xxxx0o0o0o0o0o0o0xxxx

Bowser lifted a claw off the steering wheel and tapped Peach's shoulder. She had been staring over the wall as the landscape changed. They hadn't been flying long, but because of the speed of the clowncopter, they had already gone from the heavily populated central city to a more rural part of the Darklands. "Our picnic is over there," Bowser said, pointing straight ahead.

The nose of the copter tilted downward and the noise in the back, where the koopalings were, increased dramatically as they rushed for seatbelts. The clowncopter landed softly on a green plain and Peach stood to look at their picnic location. The plain they landed on extended quite a while in any direction, one end stopped by a series of black-rock cliffs, waterfalls rolling over them and spilling into a river, cutting the plain off on one side. The other side had a thin river of lava slowly moving through, a rather bright yellow, with blue rocks on both banks extending the length of the lava flow.

Bowser caught Peach's view and told her, "That lava has a temperature ideal for plains. It is cool enough to keep the grass alive, but warm enough that it really is lava, not just rock. The blue rocks help the temperature remain constant, so you wouldn't want to touch them." He placed his claws on his hips and inhaled the air, fresh and good, although tinted heavily with smog and fumes, as it was through the entire empire.

Peach followed him over to the table that Kamek was magically summoning, and the entire group, with the exception of Cookoopa and her helpers, sat down. Cookoopa laughed and shook her head. "Y'all don't need ta sit just yet. Ol' Cookoopa hasn't started your lunch yet or nuthin'! Go play."

The koopalings moaned as they got up and started to walk around, trying to look too cool to play. Bowser stood up and looked down at Peach, playing with her hands. She had left her gloves at the palace. "C'mon, princess. I've got somewhere I want you to see." He put his claw out, not really expecting her to take it. However, she did, sending a chill up both spines as her skin touched Bowser's.

Bowser didn't bother suppressing a grin as he looked at Peach's face. "You don't have your gloves…" Peach shook her head, trying not to smile at Bowser's boyish grin. As they began walking, he looked at their hands, entwined with each other. "You have very pretty hands, Peach."

Peach looked into Bowser's eyes and smiled. "Thank you." She herself looked down at the two entwined hands and said quietly, "keeping them gloved keeps them healthy, just a little pale." She added as she noted the noticeable difference from her hand's shade to her slightly tanned arm.

Bowser looked up at Peach's face and smiled. He was so uncontrollably happy- he was here with Peach, holding her hand, taking her to a secret place, and she was willing. She was smiling back at him. Everything seemed perfect. "I love you, Peach."

Peach was taken aback. She had always known that Bowser loved her, but to hear the words…wasn't as weird as she thought it would be. It seemed…right. Like Bowser was always supposed to love her. She couldn't…didn't…return the feelings, but she still appreciated those Bowser felt for her.

Feeling his nervous stare, Peach whispered, "I know, Bowser," and tried to look at him. Once she forced her blue eyes to look into his, she smiled. Bowser smiled back.

"I'm really glad you came, Peach," Bowser told her, "I haven't taken the koopalings out for a long time and you were a good excuse." Bowser laughed and looked at Peach's smiling face, feeling as if his heart would burst. "Really, last time I took them out was before their mother died."

Peach looked at Bowser's face, looked for a trace of sadness or mourning, but saw nothing. Confused, she asked, "Bowser, why haven't you told me about her before?"

Bowser shrugged. "There's not much to tell. Here, sit." Their hands broke apart and Bowser sat on a rather tall rock, Peach seating herself in a patch of grass across from him.

They were sitting next to a quiet waterfall, cascading almost silently over rocks and into a dark pool. "Tell me about her," Peach ordered. Perhaps she'd forget his feelings for her that way.

Bowser bit his lip, trying to decide where to start. "Well, she was a wonderful koopa. Her name was Klawdia, and she was one of the most beautiful koopas I've seen. You're much prettier, but I don't think _anything_ is prettier than you."

Peach tried to hide her blush, but Bowser had seen it and smiled. "She was a wonderful mother and queen, everyone admired her and she is sore missed by most of the palace. She had a wonderful knack for children and treated all the subjects like they were our children. She died before she saw Larry hatch, and Morton hardly knew her. Kammy says that may be a reason he's so sour, but I just think he takes after his Daddy." Bowser laughed and Peach forced a smile.

Peach tried to swallow a tight lump in her throat, but it just made it worse. "Did you…Did you love her?"

Bowser looked curiously at Peach. "Love her? Well…our marriage was arranged." Bowser smiled at something and continued. "My mother knew she would be a wonderful queen and mother, but I wasn't willing. I was in love with someone else."

A little too fast, Peach asked, "Who?"

Bowser smiled as he answered, "You. But not nearly as much as I've become in love now." He laughed and was uncontrollably pleased to see her smile, not gag, choke, or complain. He continued, "My mother always told me it would never work out and she convinced me to marry Klawdia. I told Klawdia right away that my heart was sworn to you, and she thought that was immature, but after the first month, she realized I was serious.

"She raised most of our children and was wonderful, but I was never really in love with her. She was my friend, my wife, and the mother of my children, but not my love. I didn't even have a crush on her."

"And she was fine with that?"

Bowser laughed and shook his head. "Not at all. Sometimes she even threatened leaving the house, but never followed through. I told her I'd be more than happy if we split up, but she always ended the conversation telling me the children needed her and the empire needed her."

Peach felt sorry for Klawdia. She could almost relate to her unrequited love, but not quite as unbearably as she must have it. She considered herself lucky, actually, especially compared to poor Klawdia. Mario cared for her dearly, and Bowser loved her. But she…she shouldn't be considering Bowser a love option.

Blinking long, Peach asked, "How did she die?"

Bowser looked squarely at Peach and said, "Mario killed her."

Peach gasped, her head started to reel, and she felt a sudden chill. "Mario…he…he wouldn't do that…he wouldn't…not Mario…you must…no…"

Bowser shook his head. "Peach, listen to me. You of all know how violent Mario's epic battles to reach you and me are. I often imprison your subjects, kidnap your people, and infiltrate your lands with my own subjects. But _no one ever dies_. Mario battles with hundreds of my subjects and usually defeats a lot of them. The manner he fights doesn't always promise death, but…"

Bowser sighed and Peach looked intently at his face. He was pained. Was there something Mario had never told her about his journeys? Bowser took a breath and continued. "Mario has exploded more of my castles than any other thing has. He fights a little _too_ well sometimes. Sometimes, he doesn't settle for a poof, sending his victims to royal aid. Most of the time, a poof is fine, but not always. I hate him," Bowser's teeth started to grind as he thought about his enemy. "I hate him more than I hate anything…but he's a good fighter and great competition. That's why I don't kill him.

"I could kill Mario in a matter of seconds if I chose. Sometimes he really is the better of me, but if I put my mind to _killing_ him, it wouldn't be hard at all. I'm sure it's the same on his end- if Mario wanted to kill all his enemies, except me, of course, I'm sure he could. I don't have any reason to kill Mario. If you were in love with him against your will, he'd be dead. But…he makes you happy."

Peach played with her fingers, her heart feeling heavy. She tried as best she could to ignore Bowser's remark, to not think about her relationship with the two boys. She swallowed and asked, instead of the question pressing her mind, "And how did …how did Klawdia die…exactly?"

Bowser looked away from Peach's face, sighed, and answered. "She was in a castle he blew up. I didn't like her being in castles when Mario was in pursuit, but she wanted to. I told her she might not come out alive, but she was mad at me that day and…went to spite me, I think." Bowser shook his head slowly, not looking at Peach. He didn't see her loving and caring face peering at him, or her hands twitch in want to give him a reassuring hug.

"I really shouldn't be telling you all this. It's weak and stupid."

"No, it's not, Bowser. You can't let something like the death of a loved one go un-mourned. It'll eat you up inside until there's nothing left."

Bowser looked up at Peach, feeling weak and tired. "I didn't love her, Peach. That's why this is stupid. If something happened to you, I wouldn't be able to go on. I'd kill myself, even if I wasn't trying. I love you."

Peach's heart did a flip, much to her dismay. She shouldn't care what he felt for her…she shouldn't care at all. The truth was that she _did_ care, and she was beginning to accept it. She'd be miserable if Bowser didn't love her. Why she'd be miserable, she didn't know. But she knew she needed his reassuring love almost more than Mario's…friendship.

She looked into his eyes and saw the pain. He was mortal…under his shell and hard exterior, he was a simple koopa that needed love as much as she did. He was just like her, only different. "You miss her, don't you?"

"Sometimes. I miss her when the koopalings get lonely. I miss her on holidays. I miss her whenever Larry asks about her. But…I don't miss her enough to want her back. I think my life is happier without her. I know that seems horrible, but…" Bowser smiled toothily, the first time for a while, "I'm a horrible koopa." Peach laughed and shook her head in amazement. Bowser's toothy grin faded into a loving smile as he said, "You're much more of what I wanted from her, even when you're not here. You're…everything to me…even when you hate me. Even…even when you want Mario to come save you…whether or not you're kidnapped."

Peach blinked, trying to hold back tears. What was she supposed to say? 'I need to be saved from my life, but I've stopped waiting for Mario'? She couldn't say that…it was her secret with herself. She stood up, brushed her skirt down, and put her hand out for Bower. "Let's go get food."

Bowser looked from her hand…_her hand_…to her face, smiling and serious. He took it gingerly and lifted himself up, feeling himself tingle from the base of his tail to the tip of his horns. He couldn't seem to find his voice, so they walked silently to the table.

Once all eight koopalings had come to the table, Kamek talking intently with them one at a time, Cookoopa served the food. A buffet of hot dogs, hamburgers, cheep-cheeps, fried goomnuts, cakes, mushroom pasties, and all sorts of foods was laid before them. Eagerly and hungrily, everyone ate their fill. Peach complimented Cookoopa, and she in return promised Peach the recipes.

xxxx0o0o0o0o0o0o0xxxx

Tears threatened to fall as Kammy turned the pages of her photo book. She had picture after picture of her in training, Kamek tutoring her and Bowser bothering her. He was about Roy's age when she took the job of Second-in-Command Magikoopa to the Prince, and felt like a babysitter.

She remembered the crush she had had on Kamek, although he was three years older than her. She remembered how sweet he was, and how much of a brat Bowser was.

She remembered sitting next to Kamek at Bowser's wedding, watching Klawdia beam and her parents cry while Bowser scowled. She remembered feeling happy for not his marriage, but his displeasure.

She remembered when Bowser's parents died, and he came to her to mourn. She remembered how she had told him to "suck it up" and "be an adult" because "he was king and kings don't cry". She remembered how Klawdia didn't even know Bowser know _how_ to cry.

She remembered Klawdia's death, and how Bowser had yet again come to her. She had counseled him, as much as it hurt her, when he told her how he wasn't very sad, but rather excited. She remembered how her heart had clenched when he told her he still loved Peach, and was pleased Klawdia was out of the picture.

She remembered she didn't smile all that week until Bowser finally cracked and cried with his children all around him.

She remembered when Bowser promoted her and Kamek started to hate her. She remembered how glad she was to not be crushing on her lesser anymore, but how horrid she felt at the same time.

She remembered when she had offered to help Bowser create a new koopaling, one that had nothing to do with Klawdia and everything to do with him. She remembered hating herself for suggesting the idea when Bowser asked if Peach would be the mother.

She remembered what she had with Bowser and how every time Peach came into the picture it fell apart. She flipped through her album, looking from picture to picture, and the hard exterior Kammy had built after years of working under Bowser collapsed.

She remembered, and she cried.

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When it was dark, the group finally climbed into the clowncopter to go back home to the palace. Half the koopalings had fallen asleep and Peach was jealous. She herself was so tired; it was as if she'd never played as hard as they did in her life.

Looking out the window as the house lights started illuminating the ground, she smiled. She thought about the conversations shared, the games taught, and how cute Bowser was when he ran to grab her hand every time, without fail, during partner tag. She laughed inwardly remembering the comments the koopalings would make and how if she wasn't watching her back, they would find some way to pair her up with their dad.

Peach turned her face to watch Bowser steer, smiling as he remembered things as well. She smiled fondly, remembering her heart flops each time he told her he loved her. Now that he had said it that one time, he used every excuse he could to remind her. She looked straight ahead, letting her head fall back into the comfort of the seat. She closed her eyes and smiled, picturing Bowser turning to her and confessing his love yet again.

It was so pleasant, to know she was loved. It was a feeling she had wanted to feel for years, and never imaged feeling it with Bowser. Her smile started to fade as she remembered Mario _didn't_ love her. Okay, maybe he did. But _if_ he did, he was horrible at showing it. Perhaps that why it felt so good to hear Bowser tell her about his love. It was something she hadn't felt or heard before.

She had been in Bowser's palace for only three days and already dreaded leaving. Then again, perhaps next week would be the week Mario told her he loved her. She tried to smile, thinking of his sweet confession under the Grand Canal moon, but it didn't seem sweet. He was her friend, she didn't know if she _wanted_ to be in love with him…the thought chilled her to the bone.

She was falling out of love with Mario, and had been since the second she saw Bowser smile at her. She had realized how inadequate he was, how much he lacked. She had started to want to be with Bowser…she had started falling…falling for Bowser.

And the fall hurt every bone in her body.

* * *

**Author's Note: **So, how'dju like it? I do apologise for getting this to you all late. Again. This one should have been put up much faster, but at least its up, right? Well, _I _liked it better than last chapter, that's good, right?

Next chapter makes me happy. :P We start to see new perspectives, more going-ons, but its not crazy or anything. But I still like it.

So hopefully, if I get motivated enough, it should be up -much- sooner than this one was.


	14. A Look Around

_Guess what. You've been reading this story (and I've been writing it) for 364 days as of right now. I love how crazy we are._

**Foreword: **Just a fair warning, I didn't finish tweaking this chapter to my heart's content. In fact, I haven't even met my quota (meaning next chapter isn't yet done) but I promised MikariStar over on my LJ (link in profile, dearies! ;)) through a meme to have in done "in two weeks" and today is the very last day in my range. In return I challenged her to make a 1st person BxP oneshot, which she went far above the call of duty. There are -three- (eventually 4, if I understand correctly) lovely BxP oneshots under the title "Peaches and Chocolates" if you care to read.

But first read this chapter. It has an intresting drama-comic-drama-relief pattern thing going on. Hope it isn't horrid.

(Disclaimer: I still don't own any Nintendo Characters. Its a shame)

* * *

Hours had gone by after Kamek, along with everyone else, had fallen asleep. He had woken to take care of "business" that old-age had made quite pestering and the palace was eerily quiet.

As he headed back towards his corridors, Kamek saw a light in a hallway. He hobbled down through the stone passage, coming upon Bowser, sitting hunched-over in an oversized chair.

Kamek cleared his throat and Bowser grunted in reply, allowing him entry. Kamek coughed rather obnoxiously, now sorry he had 'cleared' his throat, and hobbled himself over to a seat near the huge, dark-red, black-spiked armchair his king sat in. Kamek took off his glasses and cleaned them, staring into the fire Bowser had lit.

"Have you been in love?" Bowser asked quietly.

"In love, sire?" Bowser nodded. Slowly, Kamek thought. "Yes, sire, I have. My first love was with the koopa I became engaged to. She was killed. My second love is…unrequited."

Bowser looked over at Kamek, showing no emotion except confusion. "Unrequited?"

"Unreturned, sire. She…will never love me back. My time left is short, but I am pleased with my situation."

Bowser grunted, turning back to the fire. "How can you be _pleased_ with un…unrequited love? I think it's worse than any torture device I've ever thought up."

Kamek closed his eyes and nodded knowingly. "You see, sire, my first love was a true love. We could have never been happier and were planning on spending the rest of our lives together. When she died, I lost all the tears I ever had. Her assistants became my assistants and the Toadies convinced me to try and move on. They cared for her as well, so they knew I couldn't forget her.

"I moved on, your majesty, and continued my life, never forgetting her. She died loving me, and I planned on dying loving her. Since then, I have found myself undoubtedly attracted to another. I love her, sire, but I know that she does not love me back, and so my heart still has room for my dear fiancée. I think it would be worse if she loved me back and I had to choose between she who died years ago and I still love and she who lives."

Bowser frowned. "What was her name?"

"My fiancé?"

Bowser avoided his eyes and grunted "yes".

"Deidre." Kamek answered quietly. "Her name is…was… Deidre."

Bowser looked into the fire and sighed. "I'm in love, Kamek, I'm in that stupid unrequited-love thing you seem to like. I never have and never will love anyone quite as much as Peach, but she doesn't love me back."

"King Bowser, have you ever given up on anything? No. So why would you give up on dear Princess Peach?"

Bowser avoided Kamek's intense gaze, magnified by his glasses. "I won't. I won't give up on her."

"Then what are you worried about?" Kamek chuckled. "You can have anything you want."

Bowser jumped up, the huge, quarter-ton chair screeching as it scraped across the floor backwards. "Not…her." Bowser heaved heavy breaths as he stared down Kamek. "Peach isn't like your stupid stories. She doesn't love me back, and I'm _not_ happy with that. I want _her_ to be the one. I want _her_ to be my wife, my queen, my love. I can have anything in the world wish a single wish, but _I can't have her!_ Tell me why, Kamek. Tell me why I can't have her. Because…"

Bowser's furious disposition melted as his face fell. He looked at Kamek, who was not showing the fear anyone else would have, but a fatherly look that Bowser had so needed. "I don't know why." Choking back stupid tears, Bowser stormed around the room. "She's beautiful, I'm a monster. She's a gentle princess, I'm a tyrant. She's a human, I'm a koopa. She's sweet, I'm evil. She's wonderful, I'm horrible. She's quiet, I'm obnoxious. She's forgiving, I'm cruel. She's in love, I'm in love." Bowser kicked a coffee-table across the room, where it shattered against the stone wall. "But we're in love with different people," he roared.

Bowser's shoulders heaved as he bit back tears. "She's my dreams, but my nightmare. Every time I see her, my life grows brighter. But every time she walks away, I remember it's not real. I remember after this week, she's spending a week in the most romantic city in the _world_ with…him." Bowser collapsed, and felt stinging tears breaking out of his eyes.

Kamek stepped off his chair and over to his collapsed king. He slowly, gently, placed a hand on Bowser's shell. "Sire," he whispered, "You should go to bed. You have a busy planning day tomorrow. Peach will spend it elsewhere, she'll come find you if she wants to see you. You'll be free from her and your own desires, unless it is her desires as well."

Bowser kept his eyes locked to the floor. "I'd like to stay here. I don't want to go to bed."

Kamek blinked and removed his hands. "You're the king. I'll see you in the morning." He turned the other way and hobbled slowly out of the room.

Bowser stared at the floor through his condemned tears and heard Kamek summon a door to give the king privacy. Bowser rolled onto his side and into a ball, stroking his tail. He sniffed loudly and cursed himself. _I'm the mighty king; I'm not supposed to cry. I am the world's best koopa ever, I can't cry. Crying is stupid. I'm not stupid. Crying is for weaklings. I am strong. Crying…is a stupid emotion, just like love. I don't have time for stupid emotions…_

Furrowing his thick eyebrows, Bowser tried to force the tears back into his eyes, unsuccessfully. As the fire died down, Bowser broke out of his egotistic shell. Heartbroken, the mighty king cried. And he cried loud.

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"Mama Mia!" Luigi leapt up, causing the plumbers around him to laugh. Luigi, Mario, and about fifty other plumbers were at a class on pipe-history, and he had broken a rather uneasy silence. The instructor had grown quieter and quieter until finally he had stopped speaking all together, and was now asleep.

"What's-a wrong, Luigi?" Mario hissed as Luigi flushed red.

Digging in his pocket, Luigi saw his green cell-phone had rung, but only for a matter of seconds. Luigi showed the plumbers, each glad for the wake-up call, and checked who had called, still standing. "It was-a call."

"From-a who?" Mario laughed.

"A number in-a Daisy's castle."

"Call-a back."

"We're in-a class."

A boarish plumber chuckled. "A class wif no teacher." He tapped his tusk with a hoof and added, "A teacher wif no class." The boar chuckled at his pun, though no one else seemed to catch on. Upset, he went back to sleep.

Luigi called Daisy back as Mario fell into conversation with the toad a few rows away. Daisy was quick to answer the phone.

"Hello?"

"Daisy, Did you call?"

"What are you doin'?"

"I'm in-a class, but the teacher-a fell asleep."

"Oh, okay. Hey Luigi, what are you doin' _next_ week?"

"Nothing, Daisy, why?"

"Guess what? You're on speakerphone!"

"_What?_" Luigi's face fell as Daisy perkily explained that she was at a meeting and it was "rather boring, so I wanted to do something fun" and that involved making him call the conference-call line. "Daisy! You can't-a just…put-a me speakerphone! You have to-a tell me. What if I would-a said something-a bad?"

"Like what? You're the most virgin-mouth boy I know."

"Daisy!" Luigi whispered, although she could hear him _just_ as well as anyone else in that room, "Who are you with?"

"My council. I'm trying to talk them out of making me go to this boring ceremony next week. We're supposed to cut the ribbon on a nut factory. Can you believe that? And they wouldn't even let me make any puns if I went!"

Luigi rolled his eyes. "That must-a be terrible."

"It is, Luigi, you have _no_ idea how boring it would be!"

"Daisy, our-a teacher fell asleep. Our-a _teacher_. I think-a I know boring."

"Good! Then you'll help me. Is Mario still going to Grand Canal next week?"

"Si, what does that-"

"And you're going with him?"

Caught off-guard, Luigi almost did a double take over the phone. "Ah, no-a, it's a week for-"

"A week for romance, yeah yeah, I know. So wouldn't it be sad if you went as a third wheel?"

"Well-a, that's-a why I'm not-a going, I'm-"

"Why, of course I'll go with you, hun! That's so sweet of you to offer. A week to ourselves, just you and me, Mario and Peach! Oh that's wonderful!"

Luigi laughed, realizing what Daisy had really called him for. He smiled under his moustache as he played along. "Oh, but-a Daisy, Don't you-a have a ceremony to-a go to?"

Daisy had clearly pouted on the other side and sighed loudly. "I forgot. How horrible! I'm supposed to open that nut factory. I guess I can't go to Grand Canal…during the best season of the year…with my best friends…see my boyfriend's parents…I guess I can't…how sad…"

Daisy was clearly getting impatient, and the council wasn't playing into her hand like she had planned. Luigi cleared his throat, trying to help more. "Maybe you don't-a _need_ to cut the-a ribbon, Daisy. Maybe the-a head Councilman-a could. Get-a his face in-a publicity for-a once. He-a deserves it."

"Oh, you're very right, Luigi, he does! Head Councilman is always working so hard, and no one ever realizes it. He likes nuts more than me too; I bet he'd love to do it! Oh, but I don't think he'd want to. He's so busy; he might not want to clear his schedule for the ceremony and party held afterwards. And he might not want to be on TV. I guess I'll have to do it, even though I don't want to, instead of going to Grand Canal…" Daisy sighed and they were both silent in anticipation.

With a gruff cough, the Head Councilman, a rather flabby chap, spoke over the speakerphone. "I suppose we could let Princess Daisy enjoy herself for a week. _Caroff roff roff…_ She might enjoy that and I could…_Caroff roff roff…_prepare a speech for the event…"

Obviously trying to contain her excitement, Daisy formally said, "I would very much appreciate that. Thank you very much; I'll alert the staff of the change of plans immediately." To the phone, she said, "Bye Luigi! I'll talk to you later!"

xxxx0o0o0o0o0o0o0xxxx

Peach walked through the halls of the palace, almost sliding through. She was getting more and more familiar with the basic structure of the palace and had guesses about where everything was, many of which were correct.

There was no question that she was enjoying herself in the palace without being kidnapped. She turned down a hall headed towards what she figured would be a library and saw Kammy buried in a book in magic. _A book, I must be right about the library…_

Peach squatted down across from her and tapped the top of the book. Kammy looked up and glared at Peach. "I was reading."

"I know, I'm sorry, but do you know where Bowser is?"

Kammy put a bookmark in her place and closed the book, staring through Peach. "Are you looking for him?"

"Yeah, I am."

"Why?"

Peach was a bit surprised. She hadn't really thought about why she wanted to see Bowser so badly, but after walking through the halls, she had gotten overly curious why he hadn't shown up yet. "Uh, I haven't seen him yet today. I wondered how he was."

"He's in a meeting. Tomorrow's his birthday; he has a lot of planning to do."

Peach smiled at Kammy, trying to brighten her mood. She just glared back. "Thank you, that makes a lot of sense. Do you know if he had any plans for me to do today?"

"Are you incapable of finding something to do yourself?"

Peach furrowed her eyebrows and looked curiously at Kammy. "Well, no, but I thought maybe…since he's had plans for the rest of the week…"

"Well I'm sorry your life is ruined, Peach. Do you want _me_ to tell you what to do?"

Peach stood up and looked down at Kammy. "No thank you, I'll find something myself. See you later…it's Kammy, right?"

Kammy closed her eyes and nodded slowly. "Yes. Now shoo, I'd like to get back to my book."

Peach smiled and walked off. Kammy scowled in her direction, quoting Peach's polite words in a mocking falsetto. Muttering to herself, she said, "It's really too bad she's going to find something to do. I had plenty of ideas for her to 'enjoy' herself."

From down the hall, Peach frowned slightly. She was trying to get Kammy to like her, or at least stop hating her, but it wasn't working and wasn't going to. The magikoopa made it clear she despised Peach, but she didn't know why. _Why do I even care what Kammy thinks?_ Peach thought, laughing at herself.

Delighted to be correct, Peach found herself in Bowser's library. Assuming a large amount of the books were for his subjects, his more bibliophilic children, and for show, Peach headed to the computer.

Curious, she typed her own name into the search query. Not out of conceitedness, bur more out of curiosity, she kept up with all the books being published on her. It also made it easier to squander rumors, as the Mushroom Kingdom Libraries had a lot of "biographies" on her. But when the computer finished searching, it was clear the Darklands had more.

Peach skimmed through the titles, everything from Peach's Favorite Recipes to The Life and Times of Princess Peach and everything in between. She saw more than one book on her dresses, dozens on her "teachings" and political positions, and hundreds on stories, some true, some fiction, about her kidnappings and rescues. One title caught her eye: The Truth behind Peach and Bowser.

When she found the book on the shelf, Peach laughed. The pages were all burnt, many clearly torn out, and the book had signs of endless rebinding. A librarian stepped over to the princess and nodded. "His Majesty…dislikes…the opinions that Sir Toadas Moore has, but won't let us destroy the book. Funny, he's almost done that every time he reads it, but always requests rebinding." The old koopa shook her head.

Peach opened the book and flipped through the pages, reading words like "obsessive," "stalker", "lust", and "unrequited". She fingered through the Table of Contents, reading chapters with titles like, "The Origins of the Obsession", "The Science behind the Sickness", and "Peach Packs a Punch".

Peach's heart felt heavy as she looked at a section on herself. It was clear why she had never read the book- although the author clearly took her side, the conclusion, the only part of the book stained by nothing but water, was completely on Bowser's side. It made countless references to a story Peach herself had read, "Beauty and the Beast". It sympathized for Bowser's situation, and sorrowed for his happily ever after he would never get.

Her throat grew constrained as Peach read words. She turned the page to a photograph of Bowser, comparing him to the Beast in the story. Her finger traced Bowser's features and she recognized the water stains as tears. The Beast had a happy ending. He became human and went off to marry the girl that had fallen in love with him. Bowser couldn't change…and Peach…she…wouldn't help him change…she wasn't in _love_ with him…but if she was, she wouldn't want him to change.

Peach handed the book back to the librarian and told her she had to leave. _If I don't get out of here, something bad will happen. I might start…I might start feeling bad for him._ _More than I already do…_

Peach headed towards a spiral staircase and rushed up the stairs, headed towards a kitchen, hopefully. She had climbed two stories when she turned a sharp corner and ran into Bowser himself. She bounced off his chest and he caught her before she fell backwards.

Flustered, she tried to fix her hair as she stuttered apologies. Bowser smiled warmly and lifted her off the ground and onto a more stable part of the hall. "It's my fault, Peach. I wasn't watching where I was going. Where are _you_ going?"

Her heart was pounding as Peach pointed awkwardly behind Bowser. "Towards a kitchen."

"Are you looking for the bakery?" Bowser asked, amused at Peach's behavior. He took her outstretched arm and moved it to point to a different hallway. "The bakery is that way."

Peach dropped her arm and brushed her hair behind her ear again. "I knew that," she told him, blushing in embarrassment.

Bowser's heart melted as he saw her cheeks flush. He touched the back of his claw to her cheek and smiled. "You're blushing, princess."

"I'm embarrassed," Peach admitted. She turned her face to Bowser. A lump formed in her throat as he threw her a toothy grin and she swallowed. "Let's start over. Bowser! How nice to see you! Where are you headed?"

Bowser grinned at Peach. She was so wonderful! And she was _embarrassed_. What would she be embarrassed over, she was perfect! Playing along, he told her, "I'm going to a very important meeting. Someone very important and amazing is having a birthday tomorrow."

Peach touched her mouth delicately, as if surprised. "And who might that be?"

Bowser, bursting with pride, answered, "Me! The most important and amazing koopa ever."

Unbelievably glad the tension and embarrassment (not to mention the horrible lump in her throat) was gone, Peach smiled. She put her hands on her hips and said, "Is that so? Well, what would you like for your birthday then, sir?"

"Honestly?"

Peach nodded. _Great._ She thought. His change of tone was a clear sign he was going to get romantic. _There goes my head. _

"I don't want anything except to spend it with you." Bowser's heart swelled at his luck- Peach was _here_ for his birthday! There wasn't anything better.

Avoiding Bowser's eyes, Peach laughed, "Well that's silly. There must be _something_ you want. I want to get you something."

"You do?" Bowser asked, trying his best to contain his glee.

Peach nodded and chanced looking into his loving eyes. She regretted it as she felt her intestines knot. "Yeah, you've been…really nice to me…and I…I was ta…I thought maybe…"

"I don't think you'd want to get me what I want. I'd _really_ like a kiss, but I consider it the highlight of my week if you so much as let me touch your hand."

Peach still looked away from Bowser's face, smiling in amusement. "What else do you want?"

"It'd be wonderful if you'd go with me to the Birthday Ball. That would be a wonderful present…" Bowser said hopefully.

Peach smiled. "No, it would be a horrid present. Because I'd go with you anyway."

"Really?" Bowser squeaked, immediately afterwards glaring at his own excitement.

Peach laughed and nodded. "It's a date." Peach said with a smile. Luckily for her sake, she didn't quite realize what she had just said, and it didn't quite hit her that she had just arranged a date with Bowser.

It did, however, hit Bowser. He couldn't seem to form any words, and simply grinned at Peach. "Well, I-ah, have to go plan it then. The Birthday Ball. I have to go plan it. I'll…ah…see you later, Peach."

Peach smiled at Bowser. "Alright then. See you later."

Bowser walked backwards to his meeting, constantly stuttering goodbyes, making Peach laugh and smile. She really did enjoy his presence and was glad she had gotten to know him better. As he left her line of vision, the only thing she could think about the situation was that she still didn't know what to get for his present.

xxxx0o0o0o0o0o0o0xxxx

Toadsworth was drained. He had been told over and over and over again not to worry about Peach, but he could do nothing but. Empty brandy bottles dotted the floor around him and his eyes were bloodshot. Toadsworth was so drained, so lost in himself, so drunk, he didn't notice the commotion going on outside the door.

The commotion grew louder and louder until an intense pain in Toadsworth's skull starting manifesting itself. He grinded his teeth and squeezed his eyes, cursing Peach up and down, until the door swung open. He lifted his hand off his head and turned to see who had opened the door. Toadsworth fell out of his chair as he saw King Toadstool outlined in the door.

"Your…your majesty…sire…hic…what a surprise, sire!"

King Toadstool nodded at Peach's advisor but stayed in his place. "I heard something's ailing you."

"Um, yeah…your daughter, sire, she…uh.."

"Went off on her own for a bit of fun?" King Toadstool smirked as Toadsworth blinked, a bit of drool threatening on his mouth's corner.

He slowly nodded and replied, "Yes sir, a spot of fun…a spot of jolly good, bloody annoying, fun."

"Peach is perfectly capable of taking care of herself, Toadsworth. I trust her completely. Her judgment is better than anyone in our royal courts and she's a better diplomat than I am. And I'm thirty years older than her."

"Yes, the lass sure is a brilliant g'el. Always…always…hic…liked her, yes, I 'ave."

King Toadstool swung his scepter around and leaned on it, amusedly watching Toadsworth try to realign himself. "Then I'm sure you'll stop worrying about her. As your King, I order you to clean up your act and wait patiently like the rest of us. Peach deserves a break and you can't give her one if she knows you're a sleep-deprived drunk."

"I'm not-a sleep deprived…drunk…sire. I'm just…uh…sire where are you going?"

The king looked curiously around and then back at Toadsworth. "I haven't moved."

Squinting, Toadsworth tried to stand and walk towards the king. "You keep going backwards. Don't trip…sire…wot wot…"

King Toadstool chuckled. "You should get some sleep, Toadsworth. And lay off the brandy."

"Jolly good stuff!" Toadsworth began singing a rather embarrassing version of his favorite song and laid down. It wasn't long before he had fallen asleep on the floor, kicking the empty bottles around him.

King Toadstool shook his head and left his room. He faced a maid who was bowing as low as she could and tapped her shoulder. "Do me a favor and clean up his room. When he wakes up, remind him of what I told him." The king started to walk away, but then spun around to face the maid again. "Oh, and keep the brandy out of his reach." King Toadstool winked and went on his way, humming the tune Toadstool had just been croaking.

xxxx0o0o0o0o0o0o0xxxx

Bowser Jr's eyes snapped open as his nose detected the faintest smell of baking. He stared up at the sheet he was hiding under, listening to the squeaking wheels of the maid cart he was on, and tried to smell more.

Impatient, the youngest koopaling sat straight up, causing the goomba maid to shriek and almost faint. Bowser Jr turned around at the maid, resituating himself on the dirty laundry and growled. "Hey you!"

The maid's lip quavered as she answered "yesssssir?"

Junior sniffed loudly and thrust his claw in the direction of the smell. "Take me over there!"

The maid stood up, but was still shaking. "Ssssire…I'm taking thethethethe laundry to the laalaalaalaaaun-"

"I don't care what you were doin'! I wanna go over there!" Junior shrieked. Fearing the wrath of the prince, the maid agreed and pushed him towards the bakery. "Faster!" Junior shouted, making the maid run as fast as her almost nonexistent legs could go.

Bowser Jr. grabbed a sheet and tied it around his neck, then stood up as the wind rushed past his face. He laughed and cackled as they headed down the halls, finally stopping in front of large wooden doors. Junior leapt off and threw a coin at the maid's head, rushing into the bakery.

Junior gasped as he saw bowls and bowls of batter surrounding him. Kookoopa lifted him up from behind and shook her finger at him. "Now, what are you doin' here?"

"I smelled cake!"

"Cake?" Cookoopa raised an eyebrow. "I don't know what you're talking about. I don't see any cake at all."

Bowser Jr. stuck his tongue out in reply, making the cook laugh. "Kin I help make it?"

"If you wash yoh hands and get an apron, sure." Cookoopa set him down and walked through the aisles, countless cakes batters being made, measurements tested, and tiers baked. She corrected a few assistants before stopping at Peach. "Dear me, you _are_ good at this, dearie."

Peach looked over her shoulder and smiled. She had batter all over her face and arms, her sleeves rolled up to the shoulders. Her ponytail bobbed as Peach turned back to the bowl. "I get in a lot of practice."

Hearing her voice, Bowser Jr. rushed over to Peach. "Mama Peach," he shouted, "what are you doin' here?"

"Helping make your Daddy's cake. He's having a lot of parties that need cake tomorrow."

"I'm gonna help too!" Bowser junior shouted. "I like making things for Daddy!"

Peach laughed as she sifted more flour into her bowl. "Are you going to make his present then? Junior, hand me the rich- chocolate bar."

As Junior looked for the ingredient, he answered. "Yeah, one of 'em. Daddy's got everything anyone could buy, so I kinda hafta make his gift." He handed Peach the chocolate and she began chopping it into dust.

"What are you doing for his other gift?"

"Well, me and the other koopalings, we're gonna-" Junior's eyes went wide and he clamped his mouth shut. "It's a secret, Mama Peach."

Peach laughed, trying not to let the chocolate float away as she chopped it. "What should I get him?"

Bowser Jr. shrugged. "Something good." He answered.

Peach punched him lightly. "Thanks for the tip, Junior." She laughed silently, mixing the chocolate dust with the batter and blending. As the batter changed color, Peach sighed. She hadn't worried about a birthday present so much for years. But the thing that was ailing her the most was not what to get him, but what he had suggested. And how she couldn't seem to stop thinking that it might be the best idea…

* * *

**Author's Note: **Aren't you glad I usually revise overandoverandover again:P

Anyway, I'm getting really excited where with this story is going. There's a clear path for me to forge, but guess what- I'm in a very time-intensive school production and have almost no time for anything. So if I don't update for ages, blame that. I'll try, I swear I will, but...you all deserved a warning, eh?

Can you believe its been a year? Pretty crazy, especially since I wasn't planning on updating today if it weren't for Mikari. Yaaaay a year of CoH! And goodness gracious my great and honest apologies for wasting your time in such a way with a story that never seems to end and never seems to get updated! D: In honor of CoH's birthday I'm going to...um...Hey if you have any ideas, go ahead and spew them. You all deserve more of a party then me, I say!

Next chapter's forecast: A 70 chance of Fluff with scattered showers of koopalings. Good chapter for getting out, playing sports, and learning to enjoy yourself!

_(Ugh, who on earth lets me write ANs so late? They get long and horrible, I'm sorry!) _Razzi


	15. Brand New Game

**Foreword: **Oh my goodness I'm so sorry for taking so long. And I'm not even overly fond of this chapter either...I'm way behind in my schedule for this story; I'm so crazy busy right now. I should be sleeping right now, actually, but wanted to get this to you guys. Next time I'll be free will probably be May, and then there's finals, and then there's my brother's wedding, and then I still haven't played Super Paper Mario yet. ;)

Anyway...repeated apologies. And big news! The ebtwisty team has a website up with a lot of stuff you can check out about COH, including fanart by you all and a deleted scene from the story. Poke around, have fun! And I hope you like the chapter even if I don't really.

Disclaimer: Nothing's mine still. You know that though.

* * *

Bowser looked through a window, watching his koopalings. Bowser had been at meetings all day and, as much as he loved his birthday, it was getting horribly annoying. He hated being away from Peach, so he was at least glad the topics at hand were something he enjoyed, namely himself.

Through the glass, his koopalings were playing some kind of net-game with what looked like ping-pong paddles and wiffle-balls. They were all clearly enjoying themselves, Iggy and Wendy playing against Lemmy and Larry, the rest of the koopalings cheering them on as well as booing. It seemed most of the cheering was being led by Peach…oh Peach…

Bowser touched the glass a little more tenderly. The sight was beautiful to him as a father…although Bowser hated anyone knowing it, he always wanted his children to be close to one another and their choice mother figure, Mama Peach. He watched as Peach lifted Bowser Jr. onto her lap, chatting with Ludwig about something he was composing.

Kamek lifted a scorecard and Iggy and Wendy began victory-dancing. Bowser proudly laughed as they took after their father, boasting with all their might, whilst Lemmy and Larry slunk back to the bleachers in defeat.

Iggy and Wendy ushered Roy onto the court, then Wendy grabbed Peach's hand. Although the glass was sound-proof, Bowser could almost hear Peach's laugh. It was bright, like a glass bell, melodious, like a thousand choirs of little girls, and gentle, like a babbling brook. She stepped onto the court, telling the koopalings something as she tied her hair into a ponytail.

Bowser realized that Peach must have been playing before he got there as she was decked out in sport-wear. He felt a sweat line his brow as he looked Peach up and down, wearing her short pink skirt showing off feminine legs and arms. She tossed the paddle from hand to hand and looked around, her eyes catching Bowser's. They lit up.

Bowser felt a lump form in his throat as she smiled at him and beckoned him to the court. His children spun to see their father and began jumping up and down. He hid his smile as he strutted onto the court, sunlight flooding his eyes.

"Alright, what game you playing?"

"Pickleball!" Bowser Jr. shouted gleefully. "Mama Peach taught us!"

"Pickleball?" Bowser asked. "I've never heard about Pickleball. It must be stupid."

"Bowser, you haven't even tried it!" Peach laughed, her eyes sparkling. "You should learn how to play before you call it stupid."

Bowser looked over at Peach, her perfect skin shining with the faintest touch of sweat. He cocked an eyebrow at her, replying, "Fine. But first we play a non-stupid sport that I can cream you all at."

Peach rolled her eyes with a smile. "Fine with me. What did you have in mind?"

Bowser grinned. "Volleyball!" His children groaned, some massaging bruises that started to hurt just from the thought.

"Dad, can we save our blood and play something less violent? Like tennis?"

Bowser growled, glaring at his children. He opened his mouth to tell them "no", but saw Peach out of the corner of his eye. She crossed her arms and clearly wasn't pleased with his parenting.

"Fine," Bowser agreed with a sigh, glancing expectantly at Peach. His oh-so-obvious glance made her laugh and smile, giving him a good enough response.

"I like tennis," Peach finally said, "I'm pretty darn good at it too."

"Not as good as me, I bet." Bowser told her with a grin. His children began agreeing, telling Peach far-fetched stories of Bowser's tennis prowess. "Can we play on a _real_ tennis court, though?"

"What, you mean your hot, steamy slabs of rock you use as courts? Those aren't real. The greatest thing about sports like tennis is the fresh air, the feel of grass under your feet, the bounce of the ball off the dirt…you can't get that in a dungeon, Bowser."

Pouting, Bowser replied, "I know…but it's easier to win there."

"I thought you were unstoppable no matter what?" Peach laughed. "You've already got home-court advantage. Let's play here."

The koopas and Peach all stepped over to the equipment, dropping ping-pong paddles and picking out racquets. Bowser grabbed a yellow ball and tossed it into the air. "Fine with me. Here, you serve." He threw the ball to Peach, who caught it easily. "Good catch!"

Peach smiled, bouncing the ball a few times off her racquet. "You just wait 'till you see my returns." She smirked and sauntered over to the court. As Bowser watched her go, he took a deep breath. As wonderful as she was, he couldn't let her distract him. What would that show, that she could defeat him with a flick of her hair?

…okay, so she probably could. But what kind of Mighty Koopa King would he look like if he let her know it?

xxxx0o0o0o0o0o0o0xxxx

Toadsworth was finally calm as he walked through the royal apple orchard. He picked a ripe, red apple and bit into it. Juice dribbled down his face, but he quickly cleaned it off with a brush of his handkerchief.

Reaching up for another, Toadsworth heard a familiar voice behind him. "Yoshi?" He looked over his shoulder and smiled. The apple he reached for snapped off the branch and Toadsworth tossed it to the Yoshi, who readily caught it with her tongue.

"Good catch, poppet!" Toadsworth exclaimed, the Yoshi cooing as she ran over to her friend. Toadsworth reached up to scratch the Yoshi's chin, speaking quietly as he scratched.

Distracted, neither of them noticed another toad approach. "Sir?"

Toadsworth looked over the toad and blinked. "Well, 'ello there, sah! And what seems to be the matter, wot?"

The toad gave a half-smile, glad his superior was happy, but feeling horribly like he might ruin the good mood. "Sir, we've found something…something about Peach."

The Yoshi's smile faded- she looked from the Toad's nervous expression to Toadsworth's excited one… "Wa-oh…" she said, nervously. Eagerly, she followed the toads as they headed towards the castle.

"What we found is over here, sir." The toad pointed to a very banged-up taxi-van, paint peeling and rust forming. "Someone found it in the river, and one of the gaurds recognized the license plate to be the one Her Highness left in."

"Great scallops…" Toadsworth's face fell, his eyes as wide as disks as he circled the van. "Was anyone…in it?"

"No." The toad quickly answered. "The river doesn't pass anywhere near the airport, but it _does_ flow right by the taxi depot. We're hoping the…er…accident happened there and in no way involved Peach."

The Yoshi, who was just as nervous as Toadsworth, poked around the taxi. She decided it _did_ look quite suspicious, but held no hints about what had happened.

"I say, did you contact the company about this mess?"

The toad nodded. "We're waiting to hear back. We intend to find out about Peach's trip, her scheduled driver, record of where she was dropped off, and what exactly happened with the taxi itself. Like I said, we hope that Peach is fine, we don't think there was any foul play that involved her. Coincidences _do_ happen, sir…"

Toadsworth looked at the taxi, the river-rocks proving to be no help on its already low-quality appearance. "It better blooming well just be a coincidence."

He stepped closer to the taxi, poking it with his staff, as the Yoshi helped poke around as well. An official-looking toad approached him, trying to hide a frown. "Toadsworth," he gruffly called.

"Wot is it? Nothing bad, right-o?" Toadsworth faced the toad curiously

The toad gulped. "Actually…"

"What does 'actually' blooming mean?" Toadsworth seethed, trying to hide his fear behind anger. "Spit it out, laddie!"

"The taxi company has it in their log books that Peach cancelled her taxi ride just minutes after ordering it. And the taxi we have here went missing overnight, the night before she left."

Toadsworth's mask of anger dissolved as his face instantly paled. His eye began to twitch, his legs began to shake, and he felt faint. The yoshi rushed over, supporting Toadsworth and looking the other toad in the eyes.

"Waah…" she murmured, keenly aware of the horrible situation before the castle.

The toad official glanced at Toadsworth's petrified person. "We think…we hope…it's still possible she's okay…we can figure out what happened…who knows, maybe she really did cancel, maybe this is all her plan…"

Toadsworth flinched, imagining all the trouble Peach could unwillingly get herself in. "Laddie buck…that'd be just as bad, I'm afraid."

xxxx0o0o0o0o0o0o0xxxx

"Game and Match!" Bowser roared, high-fiving Morton Jr, his team mate.

"You cheated!" Peach accused, making Bowser spin on his heels.

"We did not. I think if we had cheated, I would have known."

"What's that supposed to mean?"

"It means I've mastered cheating at tennis almost as well as I've mastered playing it legally."

"Well then how else did you beat us?"

"Hey look. If you were winning, I woulda let you-"

"Let us win? You are digging yourself one heck of a grave, mister!" Peach laughed. She turned to her own team member, Bowser Junior, and put out her hand for a high-five of their own.

"What are you so happy about, Mama Peach? We lost!"

"But we had fun. And you had some awesome moves out there, Junior! We could have won, they were on their heels for that one set, remember?"

Bowser Junior grinned, nodding quickly. "Yeah, we coulda beat you guys if we had tried!"

"That's what you think, scrawny rag-face loser-butt! We won, we beat you so bad, its crazy! You're gonna go crazy from our crazy winning stuff, loser-butt!" Morton grinned as he spat insults at Junior. Luckily for his ego, Peach's pep-talk moments before stopped a potential insult battle when Junior did nothing but stick his tongue out.

"Hey Bowser, you ready to learn Pickleball now?" Peach looked over at Bowser with a smile. "Or do you have meetings?"

"They're not important meetings. I'd rather learn this stupid game." Bowser grinned and stepped over to the equipment with Peach. Peach was a bit shocked to feel him put his claw on her bare arm, but his touch was calm and loving. "Did I tell you I love you today?"

Peach brushed her hair back, trying to hide a horrible blush. "No, not today."

"Well I do. And I'm so glad I can tell you that. I love you, Peach."

Peach looked up at Bowser's eyes, glistening with love and honesty. They were so beautiful that way… "I know, Bowser." Peach smiled and swallowed a lump in her throat.

xxxx0o0o0o0o0o0o0xxxx

The koopalings leaned in to hear the tiny spy-radio Larry had set up by the equipment bin. Their faces lit up and Larry spoke out. "Look at that! They're soooo totally falling in love."

"I get the points! I played ball with them! I get the points!"

"I played with them too, dunderhead! I get the points, stupid dunderhead!"

"Hush!" Iggy growled. "I got the idea of them to play tennis, so _I_ get the points!"

"You did not, liar!"

"They did it on their own, Iggy!"

Wendy's face lit up and she stepped onto a bleacher above them all, spreading her arms wide. "Watch and learn, amateurs. This work of cupid genius is _all_ mine. And Larry, we're using your spy stuff." Wendy jumped onto the court and approached Bowser and Peach with a sweet, innocent face. She battered her eyelashes at her dad and placed her right toe behind her left foot.

"What did you do?" Bowser growled.

"Why, I did nothing, Daddy!"

"That's a shame. I felt like getting someone in trouble."

Wendy rolled her eyes, quickly catching herself and putting on her innocent face again. "I just thought maybe you and Mama Peach should play Pickleball in private. That way Mama Peach can teach you… better. Right, Daddy?"

Bowser looked over at Peach. Answering, she raised her eyebrows, shrugged, and smiled. Bowser, trying to contain his excitement, shook his paddle at Wendy. "Alright, fine. As long as you stop calling me 'Daddy'. It's creeping me out."

Peach laughed and smiled at Wendy, who skipped off. Once Wendy got to her brothers, she waved them off.

"What are they up to?" Bowser wondered out loud, walking over to the court.

"I think they're trying to set us up," Peach replied, walking to her side of the court.

"Is it working?" Bowser asked, a little too eagerly.

Peach laughed, "I don't think you're allowed to ask that question, mister. Alright, let's start."

"Start what?"

Peach laughed again. Bowser's heart swelled again. "Start learning to play Pickleball, silly!"

"Hey, no one, not even you, can call the Koopa King 'silly'."

Peach huffed. "Fine, Bowser. I'll call you 'your-ultimate-mightiness-lord-of-all-who-is-in-no-way-silly'. How about that? Regal enough?"

Bowser grinned. "Yeah, sounds good." He looked over at Peach and felt like he would burst from happiness. "Peach, I love you."

"I know, Bowser." Peach smiled, almost exasperatedly, yet feeling herself get lost in his gaze. It didn't take long, however, to realize what was happening. She forcibly looked down at the grass. "We need to get playing."

xxxx0o0o0o0o0o0o0xxxx

Luigi and Mario both jumped when a bell rang, signaling the end of their class. Unlike most classed, the bell didn't wake them up, but rather stunned them. The teacher had caught their attention so well they had forgotten where they were.

The teacher, a short woman with streaked blonde-and-brown hair laughed cheerily. She jumped off the table she had been sitting on, sticking the plunger in her hand onto the floor. "I guess we're done here. And I actually have a lunch-break next, so I'll see you all later!"

The brothers stood up to leave with the crowd, Mario looking through their heads for the teacher. Luigi tapped his shoulder, making him jump again. "Remember, you-a have a question for-a her."

Mario nodded, trying to break through the small crowd that had formed around the teacher. He had completely forgotten what his question was about, but decided he could think up another. Finally, they got close enough to hear the teacher laugh at jokes her "peers" (as she had called them during the class) told her, answer questions about her day job, and a few questions she said were too personal to answer.

She looked over at Mario and Luigi and then did a double-take. "Excuse me, are you the Mario Brothers?"

Mario puffed up his chest, proudly nodding with Luigi. "Si, Its-a me, Mario-"

"And-a me, Luigi!"

The teacher smiled fondly and shook their hands, ignoring the other plumbers around them. "I heard you two were at the convention, I didn't think I'd ever meet you! I'm a big fan."

"Thank you, Miss-"

The teacher laughed. "Please, call me Merideth. Now that class is over, there's no need for formalities. Not that my sessions are all that formal anyway…oh look at me rambling on. I'm sure you had a question…?"

Mario shook his head. "Not-a really."

Luigi looked over at Mario, glaring at him. In Italian, he hissed "Non realmente? Durante _l'intera lezione_ avete detto che gli avete avuti una domanda per! (Not really? The _entire _lesson you said you had a question!)"

"Sia calmo, Luigi! (Shut up, Luigi!)" Mario hissed back, smiling sweetly at Merideth.

"Oh wow, you guys do speak Italian. I always thought it was just a cover up."

"Cover up for-a what?" Luigi asked curiously.

"Oh, I don't know. Something more boring."

"We're-a already some of the-a only humans in a Toad-a world." Mario said pointedly.

"Good point," Merideth said, "I know how that feels." She smiled, before continuing. "I'm sorry, but I really need to be getting to lunch and there are other people who apparently have questions for me. I hope you two'll come to some of my other classes…? I have one on proper advertising procedure tomorrow at three. Hope to see you there!"

"Me too!" Mario chirped before Luigi dragged him away.

"I'm-a surprised you didn't-a get her phone-a number," Luigi teased.

Mario shook his head, explaining, "She-a wouldn't-a give it to me if I asked. There was-a too many people around."

"So you-a _did_ want her phone-a number!" Luigi laughed, Mario's eyes opening wide. Luigi laughed, before adding, "Mario has-a crush on-a the teacher!"

Mario's face was flushing as he glared up at his younger brother. "I-a do not. I just-a….just-a…"

Luigi punched his brother in the arm, smirking. "It-a doesn't matter. It's-a just one-a crush. I-a understand."

"I don't-a care if-a _you_ understand," Mario growled. "You're-a just my brother."

"Oh, gee thanks."

Mario and Luigi walked towards their hotel room, Luigi occasionally jibing a silent Mario about the teacher. Finally, Mario spun on his heels. His mustache quivering, Mario asked, "Do-a you have a crush on-a anyone but-a Daisy?"

Luigi stopped and looked into the sky to think. "I don't-a think so." Luigi looked over at Mario's face- distant and stone cold. "But-a hey. I'm-a not the same as-a everyone. Don't-a worry about anything. We-a don't even have to-a go to her classes."

Mario shook his head. "No, I-a want to-a go to them."

Luigi looked over at Mario, a little surprised. Mario tried to hide a blush. "All-a right. I don't-a mind going; but-a I'm not-a the one with-a the crush."

Mario glared at Luigi as they arrived at their room. Thoughts were flickering through their heads as they stepped in, thoughts tainted by possibilities they wanted to dismiss. But the thoughts kept flying, and it wasn't a very pleasant time for either.

xxxx0o0o0o0o0o0o0xxxx

Kammy's foot tapped the stone floor impatiently, echoing through the halls. She conjured a clock, watching the seconds tap far slower than her foot, yet clearly marking Bowser's tardiness. She looked into the room he was _supposed_ to be in three minutes and twenty-four –make that twenty-five- seconds ago. She chanted something under her breath and teleported to his location, just a few feet away from the King's mighty pickle-ball swing.

"Sire!"

Caught off-guard, Bowser missed a return as he spun to see Kammy. His face showed surprise, understanding, and then frustration. "Peach, that didn't count. Kammy surprised me." Bowser stormed over to Kammy, towering over her and spitting sparks as he demanded, "What is it?"

"Your mightiness, you're late for a meeting that your presence is highly expected."

"If I went everywhere my presence was "highly respected" I'd never stop moving! I-"

"I said you're _expected_, sire, not _respect-_"

"Did I ask you to interrupt me?" Bowser snarled.

Kammy squinted hard before reopening apparently indifferent eyes. "No, your wonderfulness. But we really need your opinion. This is _your_ party we're planning."

Bowser pointed a finger haughtily at Peach as he snarled, "I'm busy, can't you see that, or are your hag eyes too batty and old to tell? I'm playing…pickleball…with _Princess Peach_. I think the stupid-"

"Your cruelty, you can play "pickle ball" some other time. Your birthday is _tomorrow_, sire, and we need your help. I can't leave unless you're with me."

Peach's voice carried over the court as she suggested, "Bowser, you should go to the meeting. I can finish teaching you la-"

"No one asked your opinion, princess!" Kammy spat angrily, sparks flying from the tip of her wand. "Bowser, come with me."

"I'm only coming because Peach said I should. And I've decided I want to. You have nothing to do with it, bat-bones."

"Fine." Kammy touched her wand to Bowser's arm and with a _pop_, he was gone. Before moving herself she scurried over to Peach, pressing an old, long nail into Peach's face. "You…stay out of his life…he's better off without you…we all are…you're nothing but…a piece of fungus…_princess_ Toadstool." Kammy's eyes glared with hate before she popped away in a flurry of primary-colored shapes.

* * *

**Author's Note: **This is short today because I want to get going on the next chapter. Which, by the way, only has 3 pages written and I don't really like them quite yet. I'm planning some fun stuff, but I've introduced a new plotline that I never intended to, so I've got a lot of work to do planning wise. :P

Anyway. Even though I probably disappointed you making you wait so long for an unsatisfacory chapter, I'd love some love anyway. ;)

-Razzi


	16. While You Were Out

**Foreword:** My freaking goodness! It looks like my review page has been spammed by some very anxious readers...haha and I can't reply to any of them either. XD Well let me tell you...Summer's begun, but I don't have time to write for a few weeks. AAAAAND...I've never been this far behind in story scheduling. I swear...I have 0 words written for chapter 17, I'm supposed to have the whole thing _done_ when I upload this. -sigh- But hey, at least you all have something to read now. ;)

Mmmm this is an intresting chapter. Nothing in the main story really happens since Bowser's at those meetings, but the sidestories get a lot of momentum. So that's good! aaah yes, the ebtwisty website's still there for your viewing pleasure, by the way.

Disclaimer: I actually own a character in this chapter, but everyone else is Nintendo's. So hah.

* * *

Wendy leaned in the doorway of the koopaling's private theater, noticing curiously that one of her brothers was apparently watching home videos. She smiled as her mother's voice carried over the film, narrating as she took the camera through hallways, led by a very young Roy, sans sunglasses.

Wendy stepped farther into the theatre and quietly walked up an aisle. She sat down next to Larry, rustling his large, blue hair to catch his attention. "Why you watchin' stupid home videos?"

"Because it's the only way I can know what Mom was like."

"Oh, I could tell you that. She was, like, really whiny about dad. She totally loved to laugh though; she was like crazy about us too. She wanted like a bazillion kids. If Mario hadn't killed her, I bet we'd have, like, fifteen other siblings. Maybe I'd actually get a sister."

Larry was silent, not responding to his sister. They watched as their birth-mother and little Roy snuck up on Kamek, surprising him so much that he transfigured a nearby vase into a rabbit, which Roy promptly chased down the hall.

"Is that Fluffy?" Larry asked ecstatically, actually recognizing something in the movie for the first time.

Wendy analyzed the rabbit that Roy was chasing, the camera bouncing up and down sickeningly as Klawdia rushed to keep up. Finally, Wendy shook her head. "Naw. Roy eventually catches the rabbit and has so much fun beating it up that Morton gets jealous. _Then_ he gets Fluffy. And, like, totally wastes him. Morton _never_ let me test my makeup on him."

They were quiet a little bit longer as the movie snapped to another scene, a recital for Ludwig. He was playing a song which probably would have made him cringe if he had heard it now. Regardless, Klawdia cheered loudly over the camera's microphone, Bowser, standing on the camera's other side, even louder as he applauded his son.

"Do you miss Mom?" Larry asked quietly.

"No." Wendy answered. "Well, sometimes, like, on holidays or whatever. She was, like, my mom and all, but seemed more like a nanny to me, y'know? I like Mama Peach better than her, and that's, like, sad, 'cause Peach isn't even really our mom."

Larry smiled, nodding. "I know. I used to think Peach really _was_ my mom."

"Bowser Jr. thought she was for a _long_ time. Remember when he kidnapped her all by himself?"

Larry laughed, remembering their dad's expression as he tried to hide his pride that his youngest had successfully not only caught Princess Peach, but put Mario behind bars too. "Yeah, that was real good." His face turned to a frown. "Wendy, why would we be given a mom we don't really know and Dad didn't really love?"

Wendy sighed. "Well, if you, like, believe in fate, then I think she was here to be like our mom, take care of us or whatever, because Peach couldn't. I think that Mama Peach is, like, _supposed_ to be our mom, but since she, like, hated Dad's guts and is totally a human, she couldn't be our mom."

"Oh." Larry was quiet for a minute.

"But, y'know, if you don't believe in fate, then, like, I think it was just really unlucky for Mom."

Larry looked over at his sister, amused. He turned his attention back to the big-screen, feeling the familiar prick of pain that he had never experienced anything like the things in the video. Never had and never would.

Wendy rolled her eyes, sensing Larry's pained emotions. "Hey, look. You're freaking out about not having a mother, so just make sure Peach ends up as Mama Peach for sure, mmkay? Seriously, don't be such a whiner." She shook her head and stood up to leave. "I'm going to go get some new shoes. Don't, like, drown in your tears or something."

"Gee, thanks, Wendy. Glad I have a supportive sister," Larry droned as she left. With a flick of her wrist and a jangle of her bracelets, Wendy gave Larry "The Hand". She walked out of the theatre, leaving Larry just as alone as he had been before.

xxxx0o0o0o0o0o0o0xxxx

Kamek had been watching Peach clean the court up for almost a minute before he jumped down from his referee chair and tapped her shoulder. She jumped, Kamek immediately apologizing.

Peach shook her head, trying to smile. "Oh no, you're fine. I'm just a little…jumpy."

Kamek stepped next to her, putting his hands behind his back. "A little emotional too, Princess. Are you crying about Kammy?"

Peach shook her head, knowing there was no use pretending she wasn't crying. "I don't really know why I'm crying. Maybe it's about Kammy, maybe not. I mean, I shouldn't care what she thinks, but it stings. It's like…oh I don't know. I don't know what's going on at all. Its like my emotions…I've just lost total control. My feelings about myself, about other people, other opinions…everything is out of wack, backwards, flipped over, just…mixed up." She took a shaky breath, her voice cracking slightly as she continued. "I hope its just PMS a few weeks early." She laughed, trying to cheer herself up.

Kamek squinted at Peach from behind his glasses. "PMS?"

Peach looked curiously at Kamek and shook her head, "It's a girl thing."

Kamek shook his head as well. "I've been around women for my entire life, Princess…"

Peach felt herself blush and tried to laugh. "It's a girl _human_ thing, I guess…mammal stuff and all."

"Oh." Kamek laughed. "I'm sorry if I made you feel awkward, Highness."

"No no…you're fine. I'm just not used to explaining stuff like that…back home, Daisy is so loud about everything that goes on in her body, I think my friends know just as much about it as I do."

Kamek's eyes twinkled. "I remember when Bowser kidnapped Daisy. His father was sick of _you _coming over all the time, Bowser had to prove he wasn't a one-trick pony. She chewed everyone's ears off about everything."

Peach giggled. "Sounds like her. She hates anything that has to do with politeness…she'd give her left arm if she didn't have to be a princess."

"And what about you, Peach? Are you satisfied with a royal lifestyle?"

Peach shined the glass cover silently, thinking about it. "Yeah, yeah I am. I've wanted to be queen all my life and I couldn't be happier than I am serving my people. It's the expectations that hurt me the most…I mean; nowadays I can do much more than my ancestors, that's not what I mean. What I mean is things like…things like…"

"Things like you wearing pink everyday and getting kidnapped by Bowser? Things the public expects of you?"

"Well those things I don't mind. Pink is my favorite color and…" Peach felt her face flush. "Well okay I mind being kidnapped. But it's tolerable. There isn't much I can do to stop that once it's happened. I mean the choices I make. Things like…like who I marry."

Kamek nodded knowingly. "His majesty had similar problems. When he was still young, the marriage laws for magistrates were still in order. Not so much that of royalty marrying royalty, just that of arranged marriage. That's why he was always so bitter, and possibly one of the reasons he kidnapped you so much. His marriage was practically intolerable. His wife was _supposed_ to be perfect for him. That's what the _people_ thought. He couldn't break out of expectations."

Peach nodded, wishing she didn't know exactly what Kamek was talking about. "Everyone expects me to marry Mario. Heck, _I_ expect me to marry Mario. It's just…now that we're a couple, it's expected. This is what I've wanted for as long as I can remember…but I'm not sure I want it anymore."

He watched as Peach silently shined the glass cover on the racquets. "You really don't need to do that, Peach…"

Peach looked down at the cover, than over at Kamek's bemused expression. "Oh." She giggled. "Guess I got a bit carried away there, didn't I?"

Kamek smiled and nodded. "You should go find something to do with the koopalings or the like. I know King Bowser has great plans, but he's busy today so its up to you. I'm sure there are more fun things to do than cleaning the racquet case and talking about feelings."

Peach giggled. "You're right, I'll just go find something to do…Kamek?" Kamek looked up in response. "You're nicer than I remember."

Kamek furrowed his brows and sighed. "Getting soft with age, I guess. I used to be His Evilness's mentor in all things Evil…Perhaps we're all getting a bit soft."

Peach laughed as she prepared to leave. "I like soft. Oh and Kamek? Please don't tell a soul what I've told you…"

Kamek bowed his head. "Wouldn't dream of it, Highness."

"Thanks Kamek." Peach smiled and left towards the palace, her skirt swishing as she picked up pace, practically running.

Kamek shook his head silently. He looked up to the sky, squinting as he saw the sun's position. Satisfied, he teleported away.

xxxx0o0o0o0o0o0o0xxxx

Peach was in her room, replaying the pickle-ball games in her head as she changed into day clothes. She smiled remembering Bowser's fumbles, remembering how funny it was to see him play such a dainty sport.

Peach pulled her shirt off, finding her corset and undershirt promptly. As she put them on, she felt warmth brush past her face, reminding her of when Bowser whispered his love to her…made her blush even more than when he shouted it across the court.

She sat herself on the bed, pulling her panty-hose as she thought about what the koopalings had said about the two of them. She giggled, remembering a few of the remarks. Looking over at the pink dress, Peach sighed. She'd been dressing herself since her mother disappeared, but getting on a dress like hers was still a daunting task.

Peach lifted it over her head, pulling her head through and finding the zipper in the back. As she straightened everything out, pulling out the layers and nudging the sapphire, she remembered more of the game, more of Bowser. She thought curiously about what they'd be doing tomorrow for his birthday, and she thought about her lack of gift.

Applying her make-up and jewelry, Peach remembered how Bowser's red mane moved just like Fabitoad's hair in all the movies as he ran. Laughing, Peach imagined what Bowser's expression would be if she told him that.

Peach instinctively reached up to put her tiara on her head, touching her blonde hair and remembering she didn't need to. Not that she could, it was still in her bedroom at home. Without realizing it, Peach thought about home for the first time since she left without thinking about it. She didn't dwell at all…in fact; the thought seemed just a fleeting memory.

She gazed into the mirror, sighing as she was pleased with what she saw. She was so happy. She had no one worrying about her, except out of love. She had adoring people everywhere, but they respected her. Saw her as their mother, as their friend, or as their fellow. Not their princess. She didn't feel pressured to act a certain way, to be with certain people, or to say a certain thing. She was really _free_.

xxxx0o0o0o0o0o0o0xxxx

Rocco leaned back, feeling the warm Mushroom Kingdom sunlight upon his breast. He sighed, inhaling the fresh air, and opened one eye. Sitting comfortably in a convertible, _his_ vacation was just as wonderful as he could imagine. Being a spy was sure easiest when the king was happy back home anyway.

Remembering his king and his job, he tapped a radio with his foot, turning the volume back up. Quiet static and the audible tick of the clock was as clear a message as Rocco needed…that is, _he_ wasn't needed.

The koopa climbed out of his rental car, stretching his long limbs. The sun peeked from behind a cloud, making Rocco squint. _They sure don't got sun like that in Darklands._ He moved to the back of his car, popping the trunk and taking out his koopatrol helmet, shining it and admiring his reflection.

Unexpectadly, Rocco heard a noise approaching. Hastily, he shoved the helmet back in the trunk, making the clatter of metal much more obvious than ever intended. He cringed as he ran to get back in the car. Rocco peered over his seat as he watched a toad driving a truck of equipment.

_Strange…_ Rocco thought. _Those things look like spy equipment His Horrendousness uses to keep tabs on the princess…what is a toady doing with that kinda junk?_ Rocco turned his car on slowly and stealthily followed the truck.

The truck almost certainly couldn't see Rocco's compact rental car behind it. It was packed several feet high with equipment, driving down the back street towards the castle, clearly trying to stay out of the way of curious eyes.

Eventually Rocco and the truck arrived, Rocco remembering his training and pulling over into underbrush. He cautiously got out of the car and fished around his equipment for bugging devices. He had already decided the likelihood of this being anything _important_ was very shallow, but didn't want anymore lectures on cautiousness and "making sure".

He sat on his car's hood, watching through the trees as the toad passed equipment to another toad. They began working, fireman's brigade-style to pass the equipment in. After awhile of adjusting his bugs, Rocco finally caught on to the dialogue.

"-lieve what they're saying? About what's going on?"

"Of course, don't you?"

"Well…it just seems kind of unlikely."

"Unlikely? Are you kidding? Look, you know the information supporting the situation is completely confidential, don't you?"

"All I'm saying is that I've heard around town only things that support the idea that she's perfectly safe and everything is under control."

"Well of course that's what you heard. That's all the government _wants_ you to hear. Look, I could get fired and arrested for treason if anyone heard me say this, but all signs point to a kidnapping."

Rocco shivered…he knew _exactly_ what these toads were talking about, although he had joined the conversation late. It looked like he'd have to cut his work/vacation off early.

"Kidnapping?" the first toad continued. "Are you sure?"

"Well she's gone, we haven't heard a word from her, have no way to reach her, and most importantly, she left with no supervision in a car that she had apparently cancelled being sent…it seems pretty clear that someone sinister…some evil genius…has some twisted plan and she's in his grasp."

"You mean, like, Bowser?"

The toad laughed. "Heck no! Bowser's much too stupid and blatant to do something this smart."

Rocco seethed, half-tempted to go up to the toads and teach them a lesson about talking about his king like that. But he knew his job, and kept his mouth shut, spying even more intently.

"Well then…who? And why? Wouldn't we hear a request by now?"

"That's what we want to figure out."

"Maybe she's okay…maybe the cabbie just got confused or something."

"Until we hear that's what happened straight from her highness, we're on red alert. It's just no one's allowed to know that. So remember…keep your trap shut unless you want me arrested!"

The toad nodded, a sign he'd be silent for sure. Rocco couldn't make the same promise.

xxxx0o0o0o0o0o0o0xxxx

Ludwig consumed himself in his work, walking through the aisles of his musicians as they played his symphony. Ludwig's eyes remained seared shut as he walked, claws twitching as they sight-read the music.

With a twist of his wrist, Ludwig cut the orchestra off. Ludwig was growing into himself, but as he was still an adolescent, many off his orchestra members were still taller than him…however, their respect they held towards the prince/composer/conductor gave an instant cutoff.

Ludwig felt all eyes on him as he walked up to his podium, looking over the score. "Measure 76, movement two, please." With pleasure, he heard all the pages of music flip in unison and his orchestra peered upon him.

"I'd like to change the chord. Violas, please take the A flat, trumpets as well. Violins, change it to an A natural. Bass flutes, I want you to play an A as well.

"Everyone playing the A natural, extend the note a sixteenth, shorten the next note accordingly." He scanned the orchestra as the instrumentalists scribbled down the change. In seconds, everyone's eyes were focused back on their conductor. "Start at pick-up to 75."

The orchestra played each note perfectly in tune, sending goose bumps up Ludwig's spine as the dissonance swelled, resolving itself at just the right moment. He cut them off again and smiled. "Marvelous," he whispered under his breath.

As if on cue, the orchestra began chattering excitedly with each other about Ludwig's change. Ludwig promptly rapped his baton on the podium, calling their attention. "Measure 26, movement one."

Just as before, Ludwig tinkered with his symphony for just under an hour before he was satisfied and let them play the entire work. After the final cutoff, he smiled. "I am reasonably satisfied with the progression we are making. I will allow some time for reevaluation and respite…practice will resume in three hours and we can begin work on specific problems and the like. If you find a free moment, work on mending mistakes. They were far too audible, allowing even this to be the first sight-read. Bear in mind who this symphony was composed for…make it worthwhile."

He set his baton down and readjusted his arm bands, letting air pass under them and cool his scales. "Dismissed."

The orchestra left their chairs, some rushing up to Ludwig to ask him questions, others hastily leaving his practice hall. The latter group almost stampeded over Princess Peach as she wandered down the hall.

One koopa in particular ran straight into the princess, quickly pulling himself up and apologizing profusely. Peach shook her head and smiled. "Don't worry about it. Where are you headed?"

The koopa scrutinized Peach and gasped. Instantly, he began madly apologizing again, this time for not recognizing her as the kingdom's beloved princess-from-afar.

"Sir, calm down." Peach demanded, patting the koopa on the shoulders. His green eyes stared up into her calm, pleasant blue ones and he let his shoulders loosen. Peach smiled at him, lifting her gloved hands off of the koopa. "That's better. Now, where are you going in such a hurry?"

"Home. Just got off a practice with Sir Ludwig Von Koopa's symphonic orchestra and we've got a three hour break. His Splendidness is really pleased with his latest composition, so he's being generous."

Peach giggled at Ludwig's nickname. _He certainly takes after his father._ "Is Ludwig still in the practice hall?"

The koopa nodded. "We perform tomorrow; His Spledidness likely won't leave the room until fifteen minutes before he's expected to conduct."

Peach smiled and thanked the koopa who curtly bowed in response. She had decided to spend some time with the koopalings since Bowser was busy and she was growing dangerously attached to the entire family. She had spent two hours with Lemmy and Larry after washing up, about half of the time she had ended up talking to them about their father.

It was cute how obvious the koopalings, especially the younger ones, wanted Peach to "get together" with Bowser. A lot of the time, Peach didn't even realize they were the ones bringing their father into the conversation; Bowser seemed to be present on her mind a lot anyway.

She had also spent a good deal of time with Wendy; Peach was glad to be there with her…Wendy had a difficult personality, but saw Peach as more of a girl friend she could confide all the feminine problems she had than a princess. Sometimes Peach was even like her mother, although Wendy made it much clearer that she _wasn't_ than most of her brothers.

Roy and Morton were another thing completely. Polar opposites, Peach was more than surprised to see them together, but the three of them enjoyed themselves nonetheless. By the time she left, she almost felt like she should stick around and watch them play more.

And being with Bowser Jr. was almost as much of a pleasure as being with his father. Bowser Jr. was so cute, so compassionate, and so adoring. At the same time, he was a spit-fire little ball of energy and determination that reminded Peach of his father when he was just a bit older than Junior. Or at least, what she remembered Bowser being like.

She leaned in on Ludwig's doorway and waved. "Do you have a minute?"

Ludwig frowned, looking over at Peach. "I am not completely confident that I do, highness. I am extraordinarily enwrapped in the current order of business and do not see much time for gallivanting."

Hiding her disappointment, Peach stepped into the room. "Can I help?"

"Why would you want to do that?"

The question caught Peach completely off guard. She shrugged. "I'd like to spend some time with you and I figured now was as good a time as any. Your father has plans for the rest of the week, I think."

"That's presumable. I suppose if you do not mind being ignored as I compose…I would not mind good company."

Peach's eyes twinkled. "Splendid."

Ludwig looked over his score, dipping his quill in ink as he spoke to Peach, avoiding her eyes. "You realize composing is not a perfunctory thing, of course. I will not be able to engage in a dynamic conversation with you, highness."

"I know," Peach replied quietly, walking over towards Ludwig, "but do you think I could help you somehow?"

Ludwig looked up at Peach, glancing at her up and down. "Do you have any musical experience?" he asked skeptically.

Peach smiled as she nodded. "I've been taking piano since I was four. Princesses of the Mushroom Kingdom are expected to excel in the arts."

Although he tried to keep his expression bland and unreadable, Ludwig was clearly pleased. He coughed a smile away, and then averted his eyes to his score. "I'm glad there are some kingdoms who still give music obeisance." Ludwig looked up at Peach, now sitting near him, and blinked. "I had forgotten that you've already been of great assistance. I made the changes you suggested a few days ago, the movement flows with much more consistency now."

Peach laughed. "Good!"

"Why are you laughing?" Once again, Peach was caught off guard by Ludwig's question. "It wasn't a risible comment," he continued.

The princess shrugged. "Laughing makes me happy, and I like being happy." Ludwig blinked with understanding and dipped his quill in ink yet again, although he hadn't even written anything yet.

"Let's begin, shall we?"

xxxx0o0o0o0o0o0o0xxxx

King Toadstool looked around his castle, feeling ever so strange. Although the castle was his, he had never lived there longer than two weeks at a time. He felt so out of place, as if it wasn't even his _kingdom_.

When his daughter was born, he knew she would be the queen. He intended to have her grow up with her mother, the most charming human he had ever known, and they would live in the Kingdom as the citizen's friends, their magistrates they could truly look up to.

King Toadstool knew his place…he was to be the king who signed forms, vetoed bills, visited allies, made treaties with enemies, and kept his face out of the spotlight. Everyone knew he was there, but no one knew who he was. His wife and daughter were the PR of the kingdom…he didn't need to get involved.

Since his life was so clear before him, King Toadstool was almost never in the kingdom. And if he was, he spent his days, and most often his nights, in the kingdom's government buildings. But he was growing old…he had married his wife long after most men stopped looking for love, and he knew Peach needed to be queen soon, so he vied to spend more time with his daughter. Between kidnappings and public relations though, his chances were all too slim.

The king walked through the halls, the castle feeling oddly small compared to the extravagant buildings he worked in. Peach's door was open, leading to her pink bedroom, draped in all sorts of decorations and gifts.

Stepping onto the plush carpet, King Toadstool realized the room wasn't unoccupied. Sitting on Peach's tightly-tucked-in bed was Toadsworth, flipping through a notebook frantically.

King Toadstool sat himself into an armchair, smiling at his old friend. "How are you, Toadsworth?"

Toadsworth looked up at his king and faked a smile. "Just pipin', sire, just pipin'."

"Really?" the king laughed, seeing straight through Toadsworth. "Because you might really be 'just pipin',' but you have stress lines running through your face and you look more paranoid than a goomba in a traffic jam."

Toadsworth shook his head, not laughing at the king's attempt at lightening his mood. "I just feel like I'm a blooming failure at everything I do with Her Highness, sire. The one time I trust her enough to get a cab by herself she goes and gets herself kidnapped."

"Peach has been trouble since she was born…fine lady or not. She's also a magnet for attention, especially King Bowser's. She can't go anywhere without risking capture."

"Exactly why I shouldn't have trusted her, siah. She's a blooming lighthouse for kidnappers. I'm no good, I've failed you."

The king shook his head, looking down at his feet. "No, you've done everything I asked you so well. Taking her in as her godfather…you were more of a father to her than I ever was, I don't deserve to be her flesh and blood…"

"Siah, I don't blame you one bit for doing what you did. It wasn't your duties to father Peach, it was mine, as her attendant and godfather. It's your duty to be king."

"Even still, I abandoned her. I'm not even sure she knew who I was when I came to see her on her tenth birthday. When her mother disappeared, it was like I couldn't stand to look Peach in the eyes…and I knew I couldn't deal with her disappearing as often as she does with King Bowser around. Brings back painful memories, and I'm not really cut out to deal with kidnappers."

Toadsworth looked at his notebook and sighed. "Sitting here making ourselves feel worse won't do any good for Peach, now will it? Let's have a go at helping her out."

"And how do you suppose we do that?" King Toadstool asked with a cocked eyebrow.

Toadsworth looked out Peach's window and sighed. "No blooming clue."

* * *

**Author's Note:** Hahahaha with all that spamming I'm almost up to 200 reviews...for your gift for that I'll try and get 17 done and uploaded before July. Mmmmm I'll try really hard, I promise!

Since I can't give you hints about next chapter (since it's not written...gah) I'll give a free plug to MikariStar's story "Complications". It's a multi-chapter BxP fic that I get the honor of beta-ing, and Mikari's a great author with a great sense of BxP, so go and read it:)

Also, I'm almost done with Super Paper Mario. You all should play it and use Bowser as much as possible...he's just as cute and hillarious as he could be...and our favorite relationship has more positive energy than negative! Playitplayitplayit. :D


	17. Slowly, but Surely

**Foreword:** Ahahaha, I did it! Here it is, chapter 17, before July! My 200 reviews present:)

Now I don't have chapter 18 started because I HAD to get this out...and I've been rushing to the computer to revise all day inbetween being worked like a dog. We've got a busy few weeks coming up over here, so I won't have a lot of time.

However! You shouldn't care about that!

This chapter is quite long, actually...a good 14 KB larger than the longest chapter before it. You see, I just _had _to get this stuff in before Bowser's Birthday, which is starting chapter 18, right away! I'm very excited. :)

This is a pretty fun chapter, full of important scenes, so keep your eyes open, I guess!

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Bowser sighed, his claw pushing deeper through his bushy eyebrows. He opened an eye between his fingers and saw his party-planners _still_ bickering about something. Bowser let his arm fall and stared them down, quite tired of it all. "What are you arguing about _now_?"

A mustachioed goomba replied, "What punch to serve, the same thing we've been discussing for-"

"The last _hour_?" Bowser seethed.

The koopa next to the goomba raised his eyebrows. "Um, sire, actually, no. We've been discussing the punch for five minutes…we've also settled on the seating arrangements, the dance instructors, the salad bar, and the electric bill in the past hour."

"That's it?"

"Well, it's certainly better than only a punch decision, sire," the goomba teasingly suggested.

Bowser rolled his eyes, letting the goomba's disrespect slide. "I don't really care about the stupid punch. Just put them all out, we can afford it. Let them decide for themselves, I don't think I invited anyone stupid enough _not_ to." Bowser stood up, giving an icy glare to stop anyone from adding anything to the conversation.

Everyone knew that the king hated meetings more than anything else in being king. Even compliments didn't make them anymore bearable, but laws made it clear that his presence was expected. The look he had given them all clearly told them he was done for the day.

Kammy stood up, approaching Bowser. "Sire, if you're done here, we can get started on dance instruction."

"Why do I have to dance again?"

Behind her glasses, Kammy rolled her eyes. "It's a birthday _ball_, the grand koopa tradition…"

"I've never danced at them before, why should I have to waltz around like a pussy idiot _this_ year?"

"You don't necessarily need to, sire. I wouldn't mind sitting by you the evening, as we have in the past…" Kammy suggested, trying to mask a devious smile.

Watching his higher-up trick the king, Kamek's eye began to twitch. He cleared his throat and stood up, using his staff to support himself. "But this year is different. Remember, you said you wished to dance with her highness?"

Bowser's face lit up as he faced Kamek. "Peach?" Instantly, it was as if he hadn't been in meetings for hours, bored enough to incinerate the whole palace.

Kamek smiled, both at Bowser's reaction and Kammy's, as she glared at him. He was beating her, again. "Yes, Peach. She loves balls for the dancing, and I do believe she's your date, isn't she?"

Kammy stared Kamek down as she spat, "He's her _escort_." Her purple hat was quivering, but Kamek only shook his head.

"I had heard her highness told his wretchedness that it was a 'date', Kammy."

Bowser straightened his spine in pride, agreeing with Kamek. But before the koopa could say anything, Kammy hissed, "It's a matter of speech, Kamek. His Majesty doesn't need to stay with Peach if he so chooses."

"But I-"

"Well, he's _going_ to choose to stay with the Princess. There's nothing you can do to change that, Kammilia." Kamek retorted.

"Kammilia? What kind of-"

"Oh, don't you call me that, you wretched fool. You don't know what you're talking about; His Mightiness can make any choice he very well wants."

Bowser's eyes fell, along with his shoulders. He realized this spat was more about the two magikoopas and less and less about him and his wonderfulness, and he was therefore getting quite bored. "Hey, who's the important one _standing right here?_ Kammy, take me to dance class. Kamek…go do something else."

Kammy nodded. "You lead, sire." As Bowser led the way out of the room, Kammy shot a bragging glance at Kamek, followed by a quick head-flip and a march out of the room.

Kamek watched them leave, shaking his head. As the magic formed around Kamek to teleport him away, he murmured, "things are going to get very interesting around here…"

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Rocco had his radio up on high, listening intently as the electronic bugs he had planted around Peach's castle picked up toad jabber.

He swerved through the streets, trying to blend in as much as he could. Thankfully, he had left Toad Town boundaries and was headed towards Koopaville…a koopa driving a convertible was much more common among his own kind.

On the other end of the radio, the toads seemed to have no clue what they were doing. Clearly, the toads were not used to trying to solve mysteries; that was either Mario's job, or no one's. And it was definitely not the Toadstool Castle security's forte.

The toads quarreled about how to set up the equipment, Rocco learning nothing except that they didn't know where, or how, to begin looking for their princess remotely and discreetly…that was a good sign, but the fact that they realized mischief was afoot was already bad enough.

Finally, Rocco pulled into Koopaville and parked his car near the official "secret" spy headquarters that Bowser's minions always had established. For years, he had loyal koopas live among those who were Mushroom Kingdom citizens, only in times of plotting did he send out extras, such as Rocco. Of course, His Cruelness didn't even realize Rocco was out- the koopalings had hired him.

"Hey Joey, I need to get through to Darklands pronto," Rocco snapped as he entered the one-room house.

Joey, a yellow-shelled koopa who had gotten all too used to living in peace looked up at Rocco. "You talkin' to me?" he asked through a peanut-butter sandwich.

Rocco rolled his eyes and walked past his current roommate. "No, actually, I was talking to the _other_ Joey who knows how to get through to Darklands. _Yes, _I was talking to you! Imbecile!" He ran his finger along an empty wall, grazing it along a well-photographed picture of Koopa Strikers fighting for a soccershell. "Which one do I press again?"

"Hecom wom omm da reff…ih eff ahm ebow." Joey swallowed his newly-taken bite of sandwich and smiled at Rocco. Rocco wasn't quite as happy as his roomie. Joey sighed, disappointed Rocco couldn't take a peanut-butter filled joke. "Second one on the left, his left arm's elbow…" Joey clarified.

Without a murmur of thanks, Rocco touched the given place of the picture and stood back, letting the wall section swing open, revealing a passageway.

"Say hi to the koopalings for me," Joey asked with a wave of his claw.

Rocco looked back at him disgustedly, but his roommate only gave yet another peanut-butter smeared grin.

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Lemmy's elbows were propped on the stone floor, his good eye staring intently at a small bug crawling a few feet away. "You really think you can hit it from there?" he asked his brother, standing a few feet behind him on a stone table.

"Why wouldn't I?" Larry readjusted his posture, biting his tongue as he focused on the bug. "We Royal Koopas have excellent aim."

"I don't." Lemmy told him, still staring at the bug. It twitched its wings, but remained on the floor in the same spot, ignorant to the plotting behind it.

"Well, you only have half the vision that we all have. So you have a big excuse. Are you ready, Lem?"

Lemmy nodded. "I've got a recorder ready, so we should be good to go, right?"

Larry grinned. "Yup." He inhaled and pushed a claw through his blue Mohawk nervously. Larry had yet to make the full 10-foot jump to land perfectly on a bug, but he felt lucky. "Here goes!" With a roar, Larry leapt off his table, flailing his arms and legs in an almost circular motion.

"Sir!" A young, red magikoopa rushed into the hallway, swinging her staff frantically. "Sir Larry!"

Larry turned his head to the side, impacting his landing horridly. He fell with a crash just a few inches from Lemmy's elbows, landing on his arms and digging his armbands into his scales.

Lemmy frowned. "You missed."

"That didn't count," Larry seethed as he stood up and tried to regain his dignity. "You're lucky I missed you, Lemmy," he added, trying to sound threatening.

"I'm sorry to interrupt, Sir Larry, but you're wanted." The magikoopa drew circles on the ground with her toe as Larry walked over, his head coming up to her chest, his hair surpassing her own.

"By whom?"

"Ah, your friend stationed in the Mushroom Kingdom…he sent out a Red Alert."

Larry's blood ran cold. "Rocco? Rocco sent out a Red Alert?"

"I'm sorry if I distressed you, sire, but the message on the screen said to contact you immediately, and-"

"Shut up, I get it. Lemmy! Come with me!"

Lemmy turned to face his brother, elbows still facing the bug. "But you didn't squish the bug yet!"

"Just _come on!_" Larry seethed, marching over to his brother and grabbing him by the elbow. "Let's go!"

The two brothers ran down the hallway, grabbing Iggy along the crook of the elbow as they passed, not bothering to explain. They raced up stairs and down memorized halls, finally getting into the "Outside Connections" room, a large and spacious room, aisles of electronic screens and desks of papers filling it from wall-to-wall.

Larry pointed a claw towards a machine he had designed, flashing red. "There!" The three of them ran towards it, a Code Red memo flashing in bright colors before them.

Larry dialed a long number and let loud sounds of the machine locating satellites ensue. Soon they were connected, Rocco's shaky voice explaining everything he heard -perfectly coded.

Iggy stepped up to the microphone as Larry ran his hands through his hair. "So does the flock know the eagle is in the eerie with the vulture and fledglings?"

"No, they don't think the vulture could be as smart as you fledglings were. They don't know who nabbed her, just that she's not on a pleasure flight."

Lemmy had lost interest and was inspecting nearby machines, but Larry was soon jabbering nervously with his spy. Iggy seemed to be lost in thought for a few moments before his face lit up.

"I have an idea," he whispered, a smile spreading across his face. He looked up at a clock and put out his claw. "Find me a phone-line connector in here that shows up as a phone number to reach the castle."

Larry's eyes went wide as he stared at his brother. "Are you an idiot? We can't just _call_ them! What are we going to say? 'Hey, toadies, we got your pretty pretty princess, she's just peachy over here in the clutches of your _sworn enemy_, so don't you worry your pretty little mushrooms, we'll ship here back to safety on time'? I don't think that's going to work!"

Iggy smirked at his brother. "It won't work if _we _say it, but it will if _Peach_ does."

Larry shook his head, arms crossed across his chest. "Even if we could convince Mama Peach to tell them she's okay, it wouldn't work. Peach would make them nervous, they'd get suspicious, _something_ would go wrong…and Mama Peach wouldn't lie. Besides, we can't find her right now."

Iggy turned his blue shell on his brothers, fishing through a nearby cabinet as he continued to speak. "Who said Peach had to be the one to call?" He came up with a voice modulator and threw it at Larry. "I think you know her vocal quality better than I do."

Larry's face lit up in understanding, his eyebrows slanting in as he caught on. "Well, of course I do."

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A toad had her feet propped lightly on the desk on front of her, gossiping to her friend about everything she knew. She'd been caught a few times, but until she was fired she planned on using the free phone service as long as she could.

Another nearby phone began to ring, caller-id proposing an unfamiliar number. The toad listened to the ringing as she kept talking, eventually sighing and putting a hand over the receptor. "Anyone gonna get that?" she hollered. With no answer, she angrily answered her own question. "Fine, I will." She put her friend on hold and picked up the phone, now almost done ringing.

"Toadstool Castle, how may I help you?"

"Hello?" The voice on the other end of the phone was one that the toad easily recognized- that of her own princess! The toad's chair rolled backwards as she squirmed in surprise, landing the toad firmly on the floor with a bruised rear-end to match her ego.

She fumbled for the phone, finally finding her voice. "P-Princess Peach? Is that you?"

"Um, yes, it is. I just wanted to tell you how I was doing, that's all. I'm doing well, so I'm-"

"Excuse me, highness, but _where are you_?"

"Uh…on vacation. It's a secret, so…um…I'm not going to tell you. Sorry. Now I really need-"

"Hold on, Peach. There are people that want to talk to you, let me go get Toadsworth."

"This phone is…uh… on a timer, so I really gotta…"

Ignoring her 'princess', the toad secretary promptly put on hold music, a strikingly familiar tune, while she hurriedly picked up her phone with her friend. "!" Quickly, the toad hung up and used the phone to contact Toadsworth.

"'Ello?"

"Sir! Princess Peach is on the phone!"

"What? Hold on just a moment, old gel, did you say the bally _Princess_ called?"

"Yes! Hurry fast!"

"Blimey…I'm coming, old gel!"

Within seconds Toadsworth, a long with a few of his security force members, had arrived in the secretary's office. Toadsworth picked up the phone, still on hold, and ordered the security to begin tracking her location immediately.

"Peach?" No response. Faintly, Toadsworth could hear the hold theme playing. His glasses quivering, Toadsworth hollered, "Why the bloomin' Underwhere is _Peach_ on _hold_?" Without waiting for an answer, Toadsworth took the 'princess' off hold and shouted her name yet again.

"Um…who is this?"

"Who do you think? It's Toadsworth, poppet! Where are you? Are you okay? What happened?"

"Slow down…um…please. I'm on vacation, I already told you that…I'm perfectly fine and perfectly happy…uh…nothing exciting's going on at all."

"Tell me what's happened to you, starting when you got in that infernal cab!"

There was an audible sigh on the other end as Peach's voice grew impatient. "I'm _okay_, Toadswa…Toads…um…you people over there. I'm _fine_! I just got in the cab, it took me to the airport, and I got to my vacation."

"Then why did your taxi cab end up in a river? And why did you cancel your reservations only to get back in the car with no records what so ever? Hmm?"

Peach's end of the phone conversation was silent for a moment. There was audible whispering, followed by a whispered argument until finally a scratchy-voiced Peach got back on the phone. "I don't know what you're talking about. I never cancelled my cab; they must have made a silly little mistake. And the cab was in the river? Oh dear lemon pops! I hope the cabbie was okay, she was such a sweetie-pie."

Toadsworth looked questioningly at the security who all shrugged. One pointed at a voice recognizer, clearly stating it was a perfect match with their beloved Princess.

"Um, I really have to go…this is on a timer…or something…so I don't have much time. I'll see you silly-billies on Saturday, just like we planned! Tell everyone I said hi!"

"Princess Peach, you simply _must_ tell us your location…for security reasons!"

"I told you…it's a secret! I'm not telling you until…later…um…maybe. Okay?" All of a sudden there was more whispering on Peach's end, more arguments, and a new, though muffled, voice came through. It sounded strikingly similar to Peach, but much slower, duller, and slurred.

"Hey, guys look at this! I found a button that can connect us with all of King Dad's allies! There's even an open spot for-"

The voice was followed by a rather loud thud, followed by another thud and a muffled, angry voice. Peach's voice picked up shakily. "Um, I think I'm going to go…um…a drunk guy just wandered in…I…uh…its getting crowded so I'm going to go back. I'm…uh…tanning today so I don't want to miss my appointment! Bye bye!"

"Wait! Peach! I-" Toadsworth was cut off as the phone was hung up. He sighed and looked at his security.

"All we could figure out is that she used a satellite phone…and that that really was Peach. The voice at the end wasn't, according to this thing, but…"

Toadsworth sighed and rubbed his eyes, saying, "I don't know about this. It still seems suspicious…"

"But what are we going to do? You said yourself…if Peach told us she was okay we'd lay off. She did that. Can't we…lay off?"

Toadsworth kept rubbing his eyes in distress. "I feel like we're walking into a well-laid trap…but fine. If she doesn't show up in perfect health in three days, then by gum, we're sending out the calvary!"

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Valkoopy was exasperated from looking for the Princess. After searching all the expected places she had resorted to asking directions and was pleasantly surprised. Almost every worker she ran into had recently seen the Princess and all of them pointed her towards the same place.

Hoping her run through the palace wasn't in vain, Valkoopy pressed through the Laundromat's door, not even bothering to wonder what the princess would be doing there.

She stepped through the aisles of washing machines and basins, finding a maid, hunched over at a basin, whistling whilst scrubbing a uniform clean. Her blonde hair was just barely getting in the soapy water, but she evidently didn't care. Breathlessly, Valkoopy asked, "Have you seen Princess Peach?" as she had been doing for almost an hour.

The maid replied, "Why yes, I have." She stood up, revealing how tall she really was and how much of a maid she _wasn't_. Standing in front of Valkoopy was a very-soaked-through Princess Peach. "She's right here."

Valkoopy sighed in relief, "You have no clue how long I've been looking for you."

Peach raised an eyebrow before returning to her scrubbing. "Why? Didn't you know I'd be in the laundry room?" She giggled, but slowly stopped as Valkoopy didn't seem amused. After a quick cough, Peach smiled again. "What were you looking for me for?"

"I was assigned to tell you about tomorrow's schedule…with his horridness." Valkoopy looked up at Peach nervously, almost expecting her to lash out at the koopa maid. Instead, her eyes lit up and her smile spread wider.

"Splendid! So, do you want to tell me here or what?" She wrung out the uniform she was scrubbing and laid it over the basin's edge, eagerly watching Valkoopy's expressions.

"Uh…well, we'll…in your room, but…Peach, are you sure you're okay spending Bowser's birthday with him?"

Peach laughed, wringing her hair out and waving a worker over to her half-finished pile of uniforms. "Of course I'm okay! I was so lonely today; he's been at meetings far too long. I've been planning on spending tomorrow with him anyway, just need to find time to make breakfast with his kids."

Valkoopy raised her eyebrows. "How'd you know about breakfast?"

"Bowser Junior told me all about it…let's go, before it gets too late."

"Al…alright." Valkoopy led the way out of the laundry room, a smile forming as she realized the rumors were true. As pessimistic as Valkoopy was, she hadn't believed 'Peach is enjoying herself', 'Peach is getting along with the royal children', and _especially_ not 'Peach is starting to like the king'. All Valkoopy knew of Peach was the foul moods she'd been in…this perky and happy-to-be-here attitude was pleasant, no doubt, but…not what she had expected.

Turning to Peach as they walked, she ventured, "So you're enjoying yourself then?"

"Very much so. I had no idea how much fun I could have with your royal family, I'm just ecstatic to spend the day tomorrow…I'm so excited to hear what we're doing!"

Valkoopy smirked. "I told you so."

"Told me what?"

"That you'd enjoy yourself if you let yourself." She laughed and kept walking. "His Majesty isn't that bad, is he?"

Peach smiled, shaking her head. "Not at all." At a loss for words, Peach almost lost her concentration, a smile unwillingly forming as she walked. "I enjoy his company." She bit back her grin, eyes twinkling.

Valkoopy smiled at the princess, lost in her own world and visibly struggling to get back to earth. A wicked grin spread across her face as she watched Peach struggle.

Like almost every koopa in the kingdom, Valkoopy was eager to get her king with the woman of his dreams. It didn't take Valkoopy long to realize that Peach clearly liked him, and, like most women, talking about him reminded herself about all the things she liked about him, liking him even more.

She cleared her throat, jerking Peach to attention. "So…I haven't really talked to you since the first night you got here, and you seem to have had a major turn in attitude. Care to explain while we get to your room?"

Peach's thoughts flashed to her first night, feeling foolish that she had once hated Bowser simply because he was Bowser. And yet, she also remembered how much of a traitor she had been for enjoying herself so much. But as she silently thought about her heart's change through the week, she remembered how happy Bowser made her. She remembered how she had only hated him _before_ she got to know him, and instantly felt better.

Arguing with herself had darkened her bubbly mood, and Peach much preferred cloud nine to reality. So, with a grin, she nodded to Valkoopy. "Alright, but this might take awhile."

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Conspich U. Toad had to be the fattest toad Mario had ever seen. Luigi claimed to have seen a fatter one, but his older brother didn't believe such a creature could exist without bursting.

The obese toad's quadruple chins were jiggling and he laughed at something the plumber next to him had said. Conspich blinked, his attempt at a nod, and cleared his throat. The large room, about the size of Peach's front hall, was dotted with tables. Seated were all the participants of the week's convention, cleaned up and washed for the formal dinner. As their benefactor drew their attention, the room went quiet.

Conspich smiled as he began his speech. "I believe you all know why we're here- there are two main reasons. The first reason is a grand and noble cause, the union of all plumbers through the mushroom kingdom. Plumbers, who once knew each other as only competition, can now see a greater kinship in each other. We have learned our strengths, our weaknesses, and our hearts and desires. We have discovered the best of all plunger jokes, heard the most frightening of the 'on the job' stories, and learned to be grateful for what we have."

Conspich wiped his brow and took a deep breath. Although he wasn't frightened by public speaking, such a long speech was a hard and tiresome effort for the toad. He wiped just under his mushroom cap before starting again. "I think you all know that plumbing is a greater job than clearing a pipe. Plumbers are what keep households in motion, what keep the inhabitants of this fair kingdom clean and happy, and, in some cases, who keep them safe from tyrannical turtles."

The room chuckled at Conspich U. T's joke, looking fondly at their famous role-models. Conspich smiled just as fondly before clearing his throat and returning to his speech. "We have come together for this wonderful week of learning, laughing, and more learning. I would like for the teachers of the courses to please be recognized…" on his cue, the many teachers stood in their places, acknowledging the applause, sitting as Conspich cleared his throat and wiped his brow. "And my second reason we are all gathered here is just as grand a cause. The cause of that wonderful thing so elusive this whole week- food!"

The convention-wide dinner attendants clapped and cheered. A thin and tall koopa stood and directed the attendants towards the buffet tables, Mario leaping out of his chair at the direction.

"Muma mia, Mario! If you-a get at-a the food like that, you'll-a be the next Conspich U. T!" Luigi told him as he caught up.

Mario raised an eyebrow at Luigi as they got their place in line. "I-a don't think I could-a fit that shape. My-a mustache would not-a match." He winked once before growing extremely serious, close to the food. His head spun as the hot, steaming entrees and luscious side-dishes called to him. Mario spooned platefuls of pasta onto his large tray of plates, dotting them with breadsticks, steaks, and all sorts of fine foods. Luigi followed suit, although his plate was a bit less heaping.

After the large meal was finished, the plumbers headed towards their apartments, all walking a little slower than usual. Mario noticed Merideth was helping escort Conspich U. T to his car, along with a few other convention teachers. She caught his gaze as the benefactor was fit into his seat. Merideth smiled and waved towards her student, who smiled and waved back, ignoring the lump in his throat.

Luigi rolled his eyes at his brother, but regardless leaned over to tell him something. "You know," he began, "there's a-going to be another-a party at that-a nightclub where we went a few-a days ago. The teachers are-a going too."

Mario shook his head. "I don't-a need to complicate things. We need to-a pack for our drive tomorrow-a morning, and I am-a too full to go to a party."

Luigi shrugged. "Are you-a going to call-a Peach before we leave-a?" Mario shook his head again, not explaining why. Luigi remembered she was unreachable, but regardless didn't appreciate not being able to read his brother's face.

"Are you excited to-a go home?"

Mario nodded, remaining silent for the rest of the walk. Luigi frowned slightly, looking off towards the convention's campus. He knew the trip would be good for their business, he knew they had enjoyed themselves, but what he didn't know was how it had affected Mario. Peach had spent a week alone on vacation, and Luigi knew it was because she needed a break, but if Mario was this quiet and difficult next week, she wouldn't be happy.

Luigi knew that Peach liked to talk. He also knew his brother…didn't. He knew that Peach had needed a week away from life and, hopefully, she had gotten that. But at Grand Canal, she would be refreshed and ready to reevaluate life, and Luigi didn't know if Mario would make the cut. Hopefully nothing had happened on the princess's vacation to make her realize that what she wanted in a man wasn't Mario, hopefully she would still love his little flaws.

Hopefully.

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Roy grinned as he looked over his notes. He just _knew_ he'd have no problem creaming his brothers in this competition…after all, he hadn't lost a bet since he was five. True, he had to cheat once…or twice…or two-hundred and seventy-three times…but still, he hadn't ever lost.

As confident as ever, if not more, he rapped on Peach's door. She swung it open and smiled down at Roy. Roy grinned toothily back. "Hey Peachy. You ready foh dinner?"

"My goodness, is it dinnertime already? I hadn't finished my show yet."

Roy leaned in to see what was on Peach's television, catching sight of a rather dramatic confession on _Shy Guys of our Lives_. "Don't sweat it, Mama Peach. This episode is lame, Clarice just finds out that Jeremy is really in love with some other chick, then he realizes that chick was actually a dude, but by then Clarice is sailing away to Turtle Island."

"Does Jodi get rescued from that mountain she got stuck on last episode?"

Roy shook his head. "Not foh another three episodes. She 'as to be abducted by the snow-aliens first, doi."

"We don't get these day-time dramas in the Mushroom Kingdom. It's all cooking shows and stuff like that. If we _did_, I'd have never learned to bake cakes in a matter of minutes, I guess."

"Yeah, whatevah. Let's kick it, Cookie's makin' something nice." Peach began to make a comment on Cookoopa's cooking when Roy interrupted her, obviously remembering his duties as he escorted her. "So, Peachy! Did Pops show you da royal gardens yet?"

"No, I didn't even know you had them. Are they inside the palace?"

"Naw, the best one's outside. I kin arrange foh him to take ya tomorrow."

Peach raised an eyebrow, catching Roy's eager eye. "I think we're going to be really busy tomorrow."

Roy smirked as he replied, "well yeah, but Pops'll do anyting fo'you, Peachy. It ain't gonna be no problem. He's da most powerful koopa ever, and he's got the hots foh you. Donchu worry 'bout nothin'."

"Roy, I have no doubt Bowser would do anything for me. I just think we're too busy tom-"

"Pops kin arrange anyting you want, Princess, an'I can help him do all da dirty work, y'know? I got connections."

Peach rolled her eyes with a smile still on her face. Although it was painfully obvious what Roy, as well as all his siblings, intended to do for her, it was cute. But regardless, she didn't necessarily appreciate the 'help'. Craftily, she asked, "So, Roy, what kind of connections _do_ you have?"

Pride swelling in his chest, Roy began to rattle off his most impressive 'connections' and his bravest stories relating…and he continued to do so for the entire walk.

The two appeared at the large oaken doors with Bowser and the cheep-cheep, Peach hiding her smirk, fully-knowing she had outsmarted the witty koopaling and gotten him to stop trying to make her fall for his father. Roy knew too.

He looked up at Peach, his voice dripping with disdain as he said "Oh, you're good." Roy shook his head, biting back an almost proud smile as they pushed into the dining room. Although Peach had stifled his chance at making serious headway in the competition, she was clever and knew how to find weaknesses. He respected that in a woman.

Bowser stood up eagerly as Peach stepped in the room, grinning foolishly as he saw her for the first time since Pickleball that day. Roy nonchalantly moved to his seat between Lemmy and Iggy. Like his siblings, Roy's seat had his face carved into the back of the chair.

"Peach, you can sit in Ludwig's seat…next to me," Bowser eagerly suggested, pulling out the seat with his eldest son's mug on it.

"Hey Pops, where _is_ Ludo?" Roy asked loudly as he elbowed the brothers on either side.

"Yeah, like how come he doesn't have teh be here? That's like totally not fair," Wendy drawled.

As Bowser pushed her chair in, Peach suggested, "He's probably working on his composition still."

"So stupid blue-hair monster-freak gets to ditch lame dinner to compose his stupid composing junk? He's such a stupid blue-hair monster-freak!"

Bowser raised his eyebrows at Morton. "If you want to ditch dinner to make my present even better, fine. But you have to make the present worthy of me."

Morton grumbled an answer, but no one could hear him over the servers.

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Larry poked Bowser Jr, waking his younger brother from dozing off. "What is it?" Junior hissed. Larry proudly pointed at his GameKoopa, showing off his 'You Win!' to Junior. Better situating himself in his seat, he turned his shell towards his father and Peach, still engaged in conversation. "What game is that?"

"_Super Paper Bowser_. I got it from the store this afternoon."

Junior snatched the GameKoopa out of his brother's claws, glaring at the screen. "But I haven't even gotten past the first level!"

Larry pulled the handheld out of Junior's grasp, seething, "that's because it's a puzzle game. You suck at those."

Wendy looked up from over her claw-filing, noticing that Morton next to her was starting to wake. She knew the moment he saw his brothers bickering he'd want to join, then the fight would get way too loud and immature for her tastes.

She looked around and saw Bowser and Peach…still talking. Lemmy was arm-wrestling with Roy, seemingly losing all his allowance for the next three years as he made bet after bet. Iggy was building something out of his napkins and various eating utensils, and the other three boys were about to make a huge fight. Everyone had been done eating for hours and were practically getting hungry again…Peach and Bowser seemed oblivious to the whole thing as they chattered.

Wendy slammed her claws on the table, snapping Peach to attention and earning a scowl from her father. Morton's head surged up, crumbs dotting his face, and Lemmy used the chance of Roy's distraction to slam their fists into the table.

"Wendy, what is it?"

"May we be excused? Like, ever?"

Peach gasped as she looked up at the clock, ticking towards the witching hour. "My goodness, I had no idea how late it had gotten! Everyone should really get to bed…we've got a full day tomorrow."

Bowser looked a bit disappointed, but soon let himself grin. "Yup, best birthday ever tomorrow." He stood up, his children eagerly following suit, Peach wishing them all good nights as they ran up their staircases.

Bowser led Peach up to her own bedroom, happily continuing their discussion. When they arrived at the Princess's chambers, she quieted. "Well, I need to get to sleep now…" Bowser nodded, lingering in her doorway just a bit longer. Peach bit her lip, then awkwardly put her hand on her door. "Sleep well, 'majesty." She smiled sincerely at the koopa king, her tired eyes glistening.

"Good night, Peach." He smiled and her door began to close. "Wait!" Bowser called out, swinging the door open again. "I forgot to tell you something!"

Peach closed her eyes as she smiled, opening them again with the face of a patient mother. "Yes?"

"I love you."

Peach's heart flopped, although the words were practically commonplace by now. "I know," she whispered. They stood silent for a few seconds longer, before Peach wished Bowser goodnight and shut her door.

Bowser traced a circle on the closed door, his heart swelling as he headed to his own bed.

What a good birthday he would have tomorrow.

* * *

**Author's Note:** Alright! I'm so excited for next chapter...the start of Bowser's Birthday! My -favorite- part of his birthday probably won't be in next chapter...hopefully by 19, we'll see how it goes. That's the ball, of course. I drew up a design for Peach's dress, by the time THAT chapter gets done it should be at -plugplug- **the ebtwisty website as seen in our profile** -plugplug-!

I had fun reading the reviews from last chapter...those were fun ones! I miss a lot of my readers that have left, I just so appreciate the ones that have stuck with this story, and I'm honored to have new readers too. I'm glad you guys enjoy this as much as I do!

-Razzi


	18. The Power of a Good Food

**Foreword: **Here it is! Finally! Bowser's birthday begins.

Good news- I'm back on track! 19 is finished, which means I'm back on my schedule I've been behind on for CHAPTERS. Bad news- Bowser's birthday is going a LOT slower than I expected, which means we may be well into the 20s before the ball. Of course, some of you may think that's a good thing, I dunno.

This is a weird chapter to me. It's got important stuff, stuff I need to move the story forward and some stuff I like, but it just feels...weird to me. Hopefully weird / crappy, eh? Anyway, try and enjoy.

Disclaimer- I still don't own anyone more than I did last chapter.

* * *

Junior was racing his brothers down the hall leading to Peach's room, mightily proud to be winning. He leapt over banners, one after another, and ducked under paintings and photographs being moved through the halls.

Everyone in the entire palace was busy doing _something_…even this early, at 4:15 in the morning. The entire palace was being put upside down, every hall being decorating like mad for the king's birthday. As Koopa Tradition read, the honoree could not see the decorations until he had woken on his birthday. Thus, on the most important birthday of the year, the palace went through total mayhem the second Bowser stepped in his room the night before. Armies of workers had been called from all over the country to cover the halls, decorate the rooms, prepare the ballroom and dining halls, pave the streets with offerings, and bring in truckload after truckload of gifts.

Junior got to the end of the hall, slamming into the door, followed immediately by his many siblings who crashed into him, one after another. They hollered and growled at each other, none of them pleased to have their soft underbellies smacked up against spiked shells.

xxxx0o0o0o0o0o0o0xxxx

The ruckus was quite to wake the Princess. She recognized the bickering on the door's other end instantly, frowning as she noticed the time. _Surely we don't need to start _now_…it's not far after four!_

She squeezed her eyes shut, pulling herself up with intense effort and shuffled over to the door. Cracking it open proved that the koopalings really _did_ expect her to be awake, but before she could groggily complain, all eight eagerly ran in. Lemmy and Larry leapt up onto her unmade bed, beginning to jump while Morton stood on the ground yelling obscenities at them. Wendy wandered into Peach's make-up drawer, picking through her many colors and brands. Bowser junior was telling her _something_ which he assumed was very important, but over Morton no one could hear a word anyone else was saying, not even Ludwig arguing with Roy.

Peach slumped back into an armchair, trying to rub the sleep from her eyes and absorb an ounce of the energy these koopalings all had at such large amounts. She tried to focus her attention on Bowser Junior, but soon found herself asleep in the soft, plush chair.

Peach's unconscious state went unnoticed for a few moments until Junior realized his audience wasn't responding to his wonderful story. He grumbled as he wandered into her bathroom, almost tripping over the very-nosy Wendy. He grabbed a cup of cold water, stepping carefully over his sister again on the way back.

Junior was poised to throw the water when he cringed…_if Mama Peach told Papa that I soaked her, Papa's…not gonna be happy with me_… Finally, he called Lemmy over. "Lemmy, I gotsa job for you…it's super important, so listen close." Lemmy nodded, narrowing both eyes, although only his good one was focused on his younger brother. "I need you to splash Mama Peach with this water so she wakes up."

Lemmy slowly accepted the cup, but looked disbelieving at it. "I dunno, Junior. That seems kind of mean."

Junior rolled his eyes and pushed the cup further into Lemmy's grip. "But you _love _being mean. It's just…a koopaling…thing!"

Lemmy slowly began to give the cup back to his brother although he growled intensely in response. "If it's a koopaling thing…you should do it!" Lemmy argued.

Junior pushed the cup back, growling, "No…I'm letting you have this chance!"

"But I don't _want_ to splash Mama Peach!" Lemmy argued, pushing the cup back.

Hearing an argument, Morton turned his attention away from Larry, now jumping alone. He marched over to the bickering brothers and began to insult them both for not being koopa enough to splash Peach.

The three of them grabbed the cup, fighting against each other just loud enough to stir the princess. She blinked her eyes open and then narrowed them at the boys. "What are you all doing?" she wondered aloud.

Shocked, Lemmy and Junior let go, the force from Morton's grip splashing the water into Peach's already awake face. Peach's eyes were as wide as disks and the boys' were as well. She closed her eyes and took a shaky breath, squeezing out some sopping blond hair. As Peach opened her eyes she forced a smile. "Thanks for waking me," she said through her teeth.

"Sorry Mama Peach…" Junior whispered.

Peach grinned wickedly as an idea flashed through her head. "That's okay, Junior. Wanna hug from your Mama Peach?" She outstretched her arms, pajamas dripping as they stuck to her flesh, and tried to look welcoming.

Junior shrieked and ran from Peach who began to chase them all around the room. After scattering all seven boys in her main room, Peach finally tackled Junior to the ground, giving him a rather wet noogie.

As his brother squirmed and shrieked, Ludwig tapped Peach on the shoulder. She turned her attention from the youngest to the oldest koopaling, smiling innocently up at the blue-haired brother. "We need to commence the breakfast preparations right away. Today is going to be very convivial, so Father necessitates a non-jejune meal. Therefore, it is pertinent we begin without further ado…"

Wendy stepped into the room, and rolled her eyes. "Ludwig, you have got to be like, the nerdiest thing in this world. I don't know if your nerdy words are, like, better than that "nerr" geek…word…thing…or if they're, like, worse."

"Are you usually this fractious in the morning, Wendy? Just because my superior intelligence is sometimes abstruse to the likes of you does not mean you should throw invectives around at will, it does not mean you should follow Morton's paradigm."

Hearing his name, Morton looked up. "Did the blue-freak just insult me?"

Peach clapped her hands to try and get their attention before the entire family began to fight. "Ludwig was saying we need to get going on breakfast…why don't you all head over while I get ready for the day?"

"No, Mama Peach!" Larry protested. "We all get ready at the same time as Dad does. Come make breakfast in your jammies, it's okay. It takes too long for you to get ready anyway."

Peach lifted her arms, water dripping from her sides. "Don't you think I should at least dry off?"

"Nope!" Bowser junior decided, grabbing Peach and pulling her out the door, leading the way for his siblings.

xxxx0o0o0o0o0o0o0xxxx

By the time they arrived at the kitchen, Junior had let Peach walk herself. As per tradition, the entire breakfast was made by the koopalings, this year plus Peach, so even Cookoopa was nowhere to be seen. No doubt the cook was helping decorate the palace.

The koopalings were thrilled to have Peach with them- Bowser had a tendency to punish them for mediocre breakfasts and none of them knew how to cook, so each birthday the koopalings sported a fine red bruise. This year would be different…even if it turned out horrid, they could blame it on the princess and Bowser would instantly decide it was wonderful.

Peach had already put each koopaling at a station…Ludwig was whisking up crepe batter while Roy sizzled pan after pan of bacon. Iggy was scrambling a pot-full of eggs, and while his muffins were baking, Lemmy helped his brothers as a sous chef for them all. Wendy was mixing smoothies and flipping waffles while watching Larry freak out over his sausage and hash browns. Bowser Junior seemed perfectly thrilled to be toasting piece after piece of goombread, but Morton wasn't so thrilled with his job of collecting dishes. Peach supervised them all whilst mixing and making pancakes, and overall, the job was getting done with surprising efficiency.

Except for the occasional complaint from Wendy or Morton, the koopalings seemed to actually _enjoy_ making the breakfast…if nothing else they were pleased to be working for their father's good. They also took every opportunity they had to tell Peach something wonderful about him, some stealing another's ideas to try and bump up their score.

After a little under an hour in cooking, Peach flipped her last pancake onto the towering stack. She was now completely dry, though a bit splattered with batter. Each koopaling held a heaping platter of whatever they had helped to make. Morton, still upset about his "lame job for lamesters who are super lame", got to lead the parade of food and had convinced himself his job was actually the best of them all.

As the nine went through the halls, they were applauded, ignored, and envied by the tired workers. Peach occasionally offered the workers pancakes, but when given the actual chance, they were at a loss for what to do and had no choice but to decline.

At last they arrived at Bowser's big, black main entrance to his bedroom. The koopalings looked at one another, eyes alight with excitement. Clearly, the birthday of their father was just as wonderful as Christmas. "Mama Peach?" Morton began, a bit shakily.

After blinking in surprise at his respect, Peach smiled. "Yes, Morton?"

Morton stepped to the side, leaving the path to the door wide open. "Do you want to knock?"

Peach smiled at Morton's honest question and then frowned a bit. "Bowser's not going to come out threatening to kill whoever woke him, will he?"

Iggy laughed, "Naw, it's his birthday. He knows he has to get up early, it just means more time when the world revolves around him."

Peach nodded in understanding. "Sounds like him," she said with a bit of a smile. Peach stepped up to the large door and put the mountainous pancake plate on her hip, using her free hand to rap on the door as loud as her human knuckles could allow.

The nine of them stood patiently for about half a minute before Morton's respect and patience was worn through. "Alright, enough of this crappy respect junk. DAD!" Following Morton's example, the koopalings roared at their father, loud enough to wake the entire palace.

"Come in, you lousy brats!" Bowser hollered through his door, allowing for the eight koopalings to rush in and onto his bed. Peach was practically pushed there as they all piled on, making themselves comfortable. Or at least, as comfortable as you could be on steel-wool.

"Bowser!" Peach chastised as she heard her nightgown begin to rip on the non-fabric. "What is this?"

"My bed, duh." Bowser answered from under his coarse sheets. "Gimme a plate, bigmouth."

Morton handed his father a plate, his own already laden with sausage. The nine of them all fit quite comfortably on Bowser's ginormous bed, passing food around. Peach, initially a bit dubious about preparing enough food to feed her army, was now quite confident there wouldn't be left-overs. Bowser's plate had about four times the amount of food her own did, and he wasn't quite done piling it all on.

"Hey brats, you all forgot to tell me something this morning."

With his mouth full of syrupy pancakes, Roy asked, "Wassat?"

Junior smacked his older brother over the head and hissed, "Happy Birthday, doofus!"

As if on cue, all eight koopalings mumbled "Happy Birthday", each adding their own word for Bowser's title at the end and ignoring the food in their mouths. Peach had waited until she swallowed, so her "Happy Birthday" came much later than the others, earning a few laughs.

"But Bowser, seriously…how can you sleep with this bedding?" she asked, bringing up a forgotten question.

Puffing up his chest, Bowser answered, "I'm just manly like that. I can sleep under _anything_,"

"And he'll still snore," Larry added jokingly.

They all laughed and continued the chatter over their plates. Peach occasionally stole a glance at the birthday honoree, clearly pleased with himself. There he was, on the day the world looked to him…or rather, the parts of the world he owned…surrounded by his wonderful children and the woman he'd loved since before he knew how.

Peach also noticed Bowser was without his shell…although he still had a yellow-ridged stomach, it seemed more…defined. Unlike most koopas who looked deformed and naked without their shells, Bowser held his shape quite well. So well, in fact, Peach found herself catching more glances than she intended or even understood why.

The ten of them seemed very happy together, eating and laughing, as Bowser insulted them all…except Peach. Bowser couldn't seem to be able to do anything but compliment or brag to her.

Iggy bit a rather crunchy piece of bacon and smirked at his dad. "So why don't you tell Princess Peach how old you are?"

Peach brightened up. "Yeah, this is your birthday! How old are you today?"

Bowser raised a bushy eyebrow at them both. "Does it really matter? I'm sexy no matter how old I am."

"Well you can, like, still tell how, like, old you are, that's, like, no big deal."

Bowser grinned toothily. "I'm one year older than I was yesterday."

Peach lightly smacked Bowser's defined bicep, surprised at how much it hurt her own hand. "Bowser, just tell!"

He faced the princess, her eyes sparkling. With a grin, he asked, "will you kiss me if I told you?"

Her face flushing, Peach muttered, "Now that's not a very fair trade…"

"On whose end?" Bowser craftily replied.

Junior pointed at Peach and shrieked, "Mama Peach, you're changing colors! You're changing colors!" Bowser laughed in amusement as Peach glared at his youngest, the wiser koopalings smothering Junior's mouth.

As an awkward silence started to form, Roy hissed something to Ludwig, clearly upset. Ludwig nodded and faced his father. "Father, last night you and Princess Peach were omnipresent in my phantasmagoria of dreams. You both were colluding about some sort of incipient quandary…I never discovered what it was…Morton began to fulminate so I could no longer eavesdrop appropriately."

"I began to _what_?" Morton demanded, interrupting stifled laughter from Peach. Roy smacked his forehead obnoxiously and called Ludwig off the bed to scold him about whatever he had said. While they were intensely arguing, Wendy took the open chance.

"So…Princess Peach…did Daddy, like, ever finish his pickleball game with you?" Peach delicately swallowed a forkful of eggs as she shook her head in response. Wendy widened her eyes and tutted. "What a shame! I'm, like, sure he wants to…perhaps you'll have, like, more time to finish later. Was Daddy, like, a good student?"

"Hey now, what did I tell you about calling me 'Daddy', fish face?"

"To, like, not." Wendy answered with an eyeroll.

"What is Wendy talking about?" Bowser Junior asked through a mouthful of muffin.

"Mama Peach and Dad's pickleball game, duh," she hissed back at him. She glared an obvious _stay out of this_ and Junior replied with a grin and a thumbs-up.

"So how was it?" Junior tried to help, earning only a growl from his sister.

"Well, we were interrupted, as I've told you all when all of you asked when I visited all of you just afterwards," Peach told them all with a clear motherly annoyance.

Just as Wendy was about to ask further about the pickleball game, Morton growled, "What did Loserwig von Fartface say I did? In his…uh…phantomporn dream or whatever?"

Iggy laughed out loud at his younger brother. "Ludwig didn't have a 'phantom-porn dream'…he's too socially inept to even know what that is."

Ludwig, hearing an insult about himself, spun on his heels and glared at his brothers. "What did you say?" In response, his siblings only laughed. Upset, Ludwig continued, "I do not appreciate being discomfited!"

Peach looked over at Ludwig and Roy and motioned for them to rejoin the bed full of royalty. As they did she looked over at Bowser and smiled. Catching her eye, Bowser smiled back, feeling his heart flop. _I love you_, he mouthed. Reading his words, hers flopped too.

xxxx0o0o0o0o0o0o0xxxx

Kamek, after finishing a rather fulfilling breakfast, headed to his room. He knew today would be hectic and hard, but he was on gift-registry duty, so at least he wouldn't need to tire himself out.

In front of Kamek's solid rock door was a pile, several feet high, of flowers, candies, and teddy-koopas. Kamek shook his head and cast a spell to help his offerings levitate while he fumbled with a key.

"Where'd all the junk come from?" Kammy asked as she popped up next to him, leaning against the stone corridor with a curious expression on her face.

After scores of years around magikoopas, Kamek was used to magical appearances like Kammy's. He chuckled, "Wendy, although there are a few death notes in here from Roy as well."

With an almost relieved air, Kammy replied, "Alright, that makes more sense. Just wanted to make sure there wasn't some mentally-whacked koopa out there, thinking you were worth any effort."

Kamek pushed his door open, directing the bribery towards the growing pile in the corner. "What would you have said if that's what it was?"

Kammy examined her claws and staff as she haughtily replied, "I don't know…found her and knock some sense into her." Looking at the gifts, clearly bribery, Kammy inquired, "So what does the princess want anyway?"

Kamek snickered away from Kammy's view. He craftily answered, "By the end of the week, hopefully, the same thing you want already."

Kammy scrunched her eyes as she stared at Kamek's smirk. "What?" Kamek's smirk grew wider and Kammy caught on they were discussing different princesses. Kammy knew Kamek was somehow involved in the whole Peach-Bowser get-together fan-club…thing; she eventually realized what he meant. "You ignorant scumbag," she hissed, "wrinkled, senile old koopa koot!"

She threw hexes at Kamek who easily tapped them away with his broom. "At least you're admitting it now,"

"I'm not admitting anything! I don't know _what_ you're talking about, idiotic haggard!"

Kamek leaned against his bed-stand as he continued deflecting the hexes towards the bribery pile. "Mmhmm. Which is exactly why you're turning the chocolates into chickens." Indeed, various bugs and birds were now mingling with the teddy-koopas and remaining candies. After rolling her eyes and spinning her wand, however, Kammy reversed the spells, conveniently leaving the bird-messes on Kamek's carpet.

Kamek grinned, his protruding tooth obvious, but Kammy was still sour. After a sigh, he said, "Look, I've got more chocolate than I could ever stand…take some."

"How sweet, regifted bribery," Kammy drawled, "No thanks."

As Kammy began to leave, Kamek stopped her with another question. "What are you going to do today? I mean…since His Majesty has a different escort than usual?"

Kammy grew visibly cold as she turned to Kamek. "I'm in charge of the brats," she hissed, "and when they're gone I help with the ball. Why do _you_ care?"

"Because I was curious…and it must be hard for you," Kamek honestly explained. Not being able to find a reply, Kammy remained silent. "You sure you don't want any chocolates?"

Avoiding Kamek's eyes, Kammy quietly answered, "Just the raspberry dark chocolates."

Kamek nodded and moved his wand in a way that all the boxes opened, rearranging so the select few flew up into the air, the complete contents of one box emptying into the now-free holes, and the raspberry dark chocolates placed themselves in the now-empty box. The boxes re-wrapped themselves and landed on the pile, Kammy's box floating towards her.

She snatched it out of the sky and took one out to eat. Without a word of thanks, Kammy popped away, leaving Kamek alone with his gifts.

He tipped his hat to the now vacant spot and whispered, "Happy Bowser Day".

xxxx0o0o0o0o0o0o0xxxx

Mario blinked his eyes open after his nap. He peeled his head off the car window and straightened his mustache, eyes still adjusting to the blaring sunshine reflecting off the sand. Wait, _sand_?

He rubbed his eyes again and saw the same sight…dust being blown up from their plumber's truck as they trundled through a desert…they certainly hadn't come up from home this way. "Ah…Luigi?" He asked nervously. When his brother didn't answer, Mario looked over and saw why. Luigi seemed to be in a trance…he didn't notice the sweat dripping down his face and pooling near his mustache, his eyes were practically glazed-over. All Mario could hear, besides the whirr of the air-conditioner on overdrive, was a faint hum of an almost unrecognizable song.

"Luigi?" No response. Mario furrowed his eyebrows as his brother drove without seemingly even being conscious. "Where are we-a going?"

In response, there was nothing…only more humming. Patiently, Mario leaned in and began to make out the words- "…you'll look sweet…of a bicycle built for…aisy, Daisy, give me the ans…I'm so crazy…" Mario slumped back into his chair and crossed his eyes in frustration.

Impatient, Mario leaned over and pressed as hard as he could onto the truck's horn. The blare sent Luigi back to earth with a crash as he trashed about in his seat, cursing in Italian. "What was-a that-a for?"

"You took us in-a the wrong-a direction! We're-a miles from where-a we should-a be."

Luigi seemed to be in denial that he could do such a thing, although the evidence was literally all around them. "I would-a never do that. I could-a drive home with-a my eyes a-closed. I have _excellante _direction sense-a."

Mario peered out ahead, squinting his eyes to make out an approaching road sign. After reading it, he glared at Luigi. "You also have a one-a tract mind-a." Luigi squinted to read the sign as well, a faint smile crossing his face as he read _Sarasaland- 10 miles_.

He grinned at his scowling older brother and begged, "Since we're-a here anyway? Just-a for a bit?"

Mario rolled his eyes and pouted slightly. "Since we're-a here. Okay."

As Luigi began to finally drive in full consciousness of where he was headed, a goofy smile crossed his face. Turning to Mario, he expected similar jollity but found the exact opposite. "Mario, is there-a fuzzy in-a your overalls? You look-a down." Mario only shook his head. "Hey, lighten-a up. We-a don't have to go to anymore-a boring classes. And we're-a going to see Daisy…she'll-a make us both some-a nice pasta."

"Daisy can't cook." Mario chuckled, remembering last time she tried to make pasta- she was the only person Mario had ever seen accomplish burning water.

Luigi chuckled as well. "We wouldn't trust-a _her_ with-a the pasta. But we could-a cook it, or her servants could-a for us." He glanced at Mario, his frown fading slightly as he imagined the rich, creamy pasta they could make. Luigi smiled at his success and continued. "And just-a think, next-a week, we're in-a _Grand Canal_…Grand Canal, Mario! With Mama, Papa, and Peach! We're all-a going to have a wonderful-a time."

Mario's smile spread farther as he imagined spending the week in Grand Canal. "They have-a great pasta."

Luigi kissed his fingers as he, too, imagined the delicacy. "The best in all-a the lands."

"And we'll-a be with-a Peach," Mario looked over at Luigi, the both of them smiling. "What do you think she's-a doing right-a now?"

Luigi shrugged. "Don't-a know. But I-a know what-a her cousin's a-doing." Luigi pointed his finger at the yellow figure not far off, trying to attempt to get onto a yoshi side-saddle. He honked the car's horn and Daisy, who had finally accomplished getting on her green steed, fell off with a clatter.

She brushed her bangs out of her hair and looked towards the plumbers' truck, lumbering towards her. Daisy quickly stood up and waved frantically, her shoulder-length hair bouncing playfully as she jumped. As the truck pulled up next to her, Luigi rolled down his window, letting Daisy plot her elbows right on it. She smiled at the brothers as she asked, "What are you doing here?"

"Luigi got a bit…distracted on-a the way home."

Daisy raised an eyebrow at Luigi. "Distracted, eh?" She smiled and Mario could practically see Luigi's heart leap into his throat. "Well, why don't you boys come on in…we'll get you a bite to eat. Do you think you'd like to just…stay here until Saturday? Since Peach is on vacation still, I mean…we could just meet her at the airport."

"That seems-a fine to me, how about-a you, Mario?" Luigi asked as he got ready to get out of the truck, still parked in the middle of the road. Luigi seemed more than eager to get out of the truck and put Daisy in his arms. Indeed, as soon as he stepped out, Daisy flung herself into his arms and took a deep breath.

Daisy pulled back a bit and scrutinized Luigi. "I think we could get you two a shower, too." She pulled herself out of Luigi's hug and smiled. "So Mario, it's up to you. Stay?"

Mario nodded. "We're-a here, we don't-a have plans. Sounds good to-a me."

Daisy squealed in joy, grabbing both boys hands and pulling them fiercely towards her desert castle. She jabbered on about how bored she was, the plans she would make, where they would sleep, and even her adventures in yoshi riding 'the proper way'.

Behind the princess's back, Mario tried to catch Luigi's eye, finding her expectable mood and reaction to their arrival amusing. However, Luigi's eyes were firmly placed on the Princess herself, a smile forming and his expression distant and enamored. Mario smiled under his mustache and rolled his eyes, letting Daisy pull him along.

* * *

**Author's Note: **Next chapter's pretty weird too. It's like I didn't write it.

Actually, sometimes I get weird stuff going on writing this story that makes it go other than planned...Peach says and does stuff I didn't mean for her to do, and next chapter, funnily enough, Bowser gives insight on life which _totally _makes sense coming from him, but after I finished typing it I was like "heh...that's actually really cool. Did I just make that up?". Makes me feel like I should write wise people into stories so I can get insight myself. XD

But aside from that icky sidetracting I just had, next chapter's intresting/weird. But it's got a good deal of fluff...in fact, the ENTIRE thing is in either Bowser or Peach's line of sight...I haven't been so lame about POVs since chapter 2. :P

Anyway. Thank you for reading this chapter, regardless of it being kind of weird. Hopefully the weirdness, wherever it came from, will wear off by 20. :)

-Razzi


	19. Solid as Stone

**Foreword:** 17. That's the number of reviews I thought my story would have at the time Peach left for Grand Canal. I thought, if I managed to upload the entire finished story, I might scrape 23. Not 300 before Bowser's birthday was even that far...gosh. XD

Of course the 300 is because I got spammed again, which is very nice and very, very flattering, but please. Keep in mind this is a joint account and the 40-something review emails were not fun for the dear who started ebtwisty and is letting us use her personal email account for this. So I thought I'd tell you although I love reviews almost as much as I love writing the actual story (which is a great, great deal, mind you!), content, not quantity, is what pleases me most. If they're the _exact _same review (aka what I define spam as), I see it as the _exact _same review and nothing else.

Now that that's over with, lets get on to the story, eh?

This is the second chapter that spawned from weirdness...this one is kind of gross to me, actually. Not gross as in content, gross as in...people seem really ooc and I can't fix it and the writing and...stuff you guys may/may not notice but just scream at me without the ability to be fixed. D:

Disclaimer: The only mario stuff I own are a few video games and a yoshi plush. Not the characters, sorry.

* * *

Peach was putting in her bright, blue earrings as she heard the chatter in her bedroom get louder and louder. The koopalings had apparently decided that her guest bedroom was a suitable meeting place and all but Ludwig (who was in his orchestra hall practicing) were scattered throughout her room.

Wendy was rifling through Peach's jewelry, having decided she alone could help Peach choose suitable jewelry for her sundress. She gasped as she picked up a necklace, sapphires and diamonds scattered along the dangling strands of silver, forming a lovely inverted pyramid of glimmer. "Where'd you get _this_ one, Peach?"

Peach stepped over to Wendy and looked down at the necklace. She picked it up and felt the cold jewels, a half smile forming as she tried to remember. "I think…I think this one came in the mail. Unnamed package…went through hours of searching for items of mass terror, but it was cleared." She examined the sparkling jewelry and her smile widened. "Never figured out who sent it…but I get unmarked packages all the time from people who like me. I usually only get something this good about once a year."

Wendy plucked the necklace out of Peach's hands and looked it over. "I, like, _totally_ remember this necklace. Dad spent, like, forever picking it out."

"Dad?" Peach scrunched her eyebrows. "Are you saying _Bowser_ sent this to me?"

Wendy looked up at Peach calmly, but soon her whole attitude changed. _This is, like, the ultimate chance! Like, _totally_ the time for match-making. _She grinned as the thoughts spun in her head. Even Wendy's voice changed, a bit silkier and sweeter. "Yup, Daddy always like sends you pretty stuff on his birthday; he thinks if _you're_ like happy, even if you don't know who, like, sent it, he can, like, be happy too."

Peach was still staring at the necklace in confusion. "But there was no note…Bowser wouldn't send stuff like this _anonymously_…"

"And you think it'd like make it past security if it, like, said 'Sent by Bowser with Love'? Like, never!"

Peach smiled- that made sense. "So he sent it to make _me_ happy…to make _him_ happy…?"

"Like, totally." Wendy grinned, Peach's face was glistening. The koopaling batted her eyelashes and put her claws behind her back. "It, like, totally matches your sundress too, Peachy."

Peach turned to the mirror, putting the diamond-and-sapphire necklace against her neck. "I suppose it does…" She smiled, thinking about Bowser picking out jewelry, and latched it gracefully. As she had many days before, she admired the look of the jewelry on her, shining as bright as her eyes. But for the first time, she imagined the tenderness Bowser had picked it out with, how he clearly knew it would be stunning with her eyes, her hair, her face shape, and Peach smiled. She turned to Wendy, still smiling. "We should probably get going."

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Kammy watched with an unwavering eye as the koopalings marched past her, her narrowed eyes narrowing even more as Peach walked by as well. She thrust out a cloaked arm and glared up at Peach. "Where do you think you're going?"

Brightly, Peach answered, "I was just going to sit with the koopalings until Bowser came to pick me up. He said he'd meet me here before we left for the first gifts."

"So you know the schedule?"

Peach nodded. "Valkoopy told me all about it yesterday. First we're going to visit those communities who won the raffle, they'll present their gifts right to Bowser, then we'll head back here for the birthday luncheon…then we'll-"

"Why do you insist on using that putrid pronoun?" Kammy hissed. As Peach opened her mouth to question, Kammy jumped up and down, hissing, "That pronoun! That pronoun! 'We'! What makes you think you'll be spending every moment of Bowser's birthday _with_ him?"

A bit hurt at Kammy's tone, she answered, "I just assumed…he said he wanted to spend it with me, so I thought…"

"Bowser spends his birthday with no one but himself on most occasions. Sometimes his children join him, occasionally Kamek and myself…but _never_ has he spent the _entire_ day with someone else."

"Is that another koopa tradition?" Peach asked, brightening now that she assumed Kammy wasn't only mad at her.

Unfortunately, Kammy didn't, or rather, _wouldn't_ read Peach's tone as a plea for forgiveness and friendship. "No, it's just the way things are. So you may want to hear the _real_ schedule before you go off having hallucinations about a holiday with His Horidness."

"You're rather good at alliteration," Peach complimented. This was clearly not what Kammy wanted to hear. The magikoopa bristled, sparks spurting from the end of her wand as her eye twitched.

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Bowser was feeling his usual delightment at feeling his own face stare down at himself. He pompously pretended to ignore the thrilled workers as they wished him a happy birthday. Bowser felt his grin widening as he walked down the halls, banners and streamers declaring his fantasticness even more than his countless portraits and busts did. He was sure _nothing_ could bring him down, his ego raising him high above any blues he could feel.

As he stepped into the hall he had arranged to meet his children and Peach in, however, he felt himself deflate just a bit. Amidst more banners, balloons, and streamers was Kammy and Peach, Kammy screeching something horrid at his princess, now on the verge of tears.

Anger, like a furious herd of flaming stallions, filled Bowser's heart as he saw his wonderful, beautiful, indescribable love being diminished before his eyes. "KAMMY!" Bowser bellowed, the magikoopa shuddering as she stopped mid-word, not daring to look at the honoree storming towards them.

"What the heck do you think you're doing? I don't think part of your job was to yell at our guest!"

Kammy took a deep breath and stared up at Bowser, still avoiding his burning eyes. "I'm sorry, sire. It won't happen again."

Sparks flew out of Bowser's mouth as he shook a deadly claw at Kammy. "You'd better hope it doesn't, bat-breath. Go count chain-chomps or something."

"Yessire." Kammy bowed low, knowing it wasn't worth it to tell Bowser she was responsible for the koopalings. He'd probably just incinerate her for her cheek.

Turning to Peach, Bowser saw her take a deep breath and blink fiercely. As softly and tenderly as a giant, monster of a koopa could muster, Bowser murmured, "Kammy's a bag of worthless magpies. And whatever _anyone_ says that could make you sad is a lie. Unless it makes you sad to hear how wonderful I am. That is _never_ a lie."

Peach smiled a bit to hide her familiar pain, looking up at Bowser's grin. "I'll keep that in mind," she said.

"And if my being amazing makes you sad," Bowser continued, "Then you've got to come to grips with the truth. Peach grinned up at Bowser, grinning back at her, flanked by hundreds of balloons with the same grinning face. "But really, Peach…what was hag-face saying to you?"

Peach shook her head. "Don't worry about it- it's nothing. I just…I'm not used to being…" Peach looked up at Bowser, biting her lip before finishing, "hated."

Bowser shrugged. "You get used to it after awhile. Learn to use their faces as dart practice. And hey, as long as _you_ know there really shouldn't be a reason to be hated, you just realize they're all stupid. You don't want to be liked by stupid people anyway."

Peach was almost a bit surprised by the answer Bowser had on hand, but, she supposed, he must be used to dislike. Why, just a few days ago, she hated him for no real reason…other than that he was him. "That's one way to look at it."

"It's the only way to look at it," Bowser corrected pompously. "That's why I made it up." Peach giggled, avoiding Bowser's powerful gaze and watching the koopalings. "We need to get going…where's the hag in charge of keeping track of these brats?"

Peach looked back at Bowser, rolling her eyes. "You just sent her to count chain chomps."

"Well, what the heck is she doing that for? Kammy!"

Upon her summoning, Kammy appeared in a puff of purple smoke. She blinked at Bowser. "Yessire?"

"You're supposed to be watching the koopalings. Do you have fuzzies for brains? How can you watch the stupid koopalings from the chain chomp kennel? Me and Peach have to go, so get to work, fanny-face."

Peach thought Bowser sounded almost…it was hard to describe, but more like the brute she had thought was starting to leave his…and her…lives. She had clearly gotten all too used to the softer creature Bowser was becoming. "Bowser," she said with a tone of almost scolding, "watch yourself, Kammy doesn't deserve that…"

Bowser looked back at Peach and whispered (clearly unaware his horse whisper was just as loud as a normal person's talking voice), "Yeah she does! Peach, I already told you she has no place to make you upset. I thought we agreed she was stupid!"

Peach raised her eyebrows and recited "_Though the world is cruel and mean, the royal should be honor'bly seen. If anyone acts in a way that is wrong, be the ruler you are and lead them along._ You catch more flies with honey than vinegar, Bowser."

Bowser squeezed his bushy eyebrows together in obvious surprise, loudly whispering, "where did you learn that nansy-pansy rhyme? It sounds like it came out of a kiddy book!"

Peach laughed lightly at the irony. Smiling, she told him, "it _did_. 'The Book of Manners for Growing Royalty'. My mother used to read it to me every night before she left."

Bowser was about to reply when he heard Kammy impatiently draw breath. He spun on his heels, about to give her some guff for her attitude, but remembered Peach's counsel. He would rather have her approval than give Kammy what she deserved. "Kammy…uh…just watch the kids. We're gonna go…" He looked down at Peach with an eager look on his face and she mouthed 'please'. "We're gonna go please." He corrected, looking back at Peach's face even more eagerly. She laughed.

"No," she whispered softly, "Tell her to watch them _please_. She has no control over whether we leave or not…" to herself, she pondered what she just said. She remembered how adamant Kammy had been about her not spending the whole day with Bowser…it almost felt ironic to Peach.

"Okay," Bowser said eagerly still, not realizing Peach's internal conversation or recognizing her smug face. "Watch the kids _please_." Both women were obviously amused with the koopa king; even Bowser's children had stopped their commotion to watch him. Ignoring all this, he turned his radiant face to Peach who chuckled a bit. She told him that he did a good job and Bowser's beaming smile spread wider. "Can we go now?"

Peach smiled and nodded, putting out her hand to let Bowser take. He did so with surprising tenderness for the eagerness in his eyes. He led her out of the room, winking at his children who were beside themselves in pleasure, some even catcalling.

He looked back at Peach, looking a little distant, but a smile firmly planted on her painted lips. Bowser looked her up and down, from her crownless blonde hair to the bottom of her pale pink sundress. His eyes lingered on the dazzling necklace that complimented Peach's beauty perfectly. He took a deep breath, pumping out his chest, and proudly strode forward.

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A squat little Hammer Bro itched his growing mustache and cleared his throat. "Yo' majesty, weef got one mo' places te' go befo' we're done wif dese live-acceptances. Nex' one's anuffer town gift." His voice was surprisingly high for his girth, and it was obvious he didn't quite know what to think about being in such close proximity to his mighty king, especially several hundred feet in the air in a clowncar.

The Hammer Bro's fear wasn't very well placed, as Bowser was hardly even paying attention to his existence. All his eyes were on Peach as she stared down at the Darklands landscape, her blonde hair tousling just so in the wind. He waved his claw and murmured, "fine, fine, that's just fine," and returned to his Peach-watching.

As per tradition, the national raffle to see whose birthday gifts King Bowser Koopa would open live, in their presence, and on his birthday was a very large deal. Counties, cities, and even entire providences would often pool their money, hoping they could show off some large tribute to the Koopa King. Occasionally, however, filthy rich individuals would buy enough private raffle tickets to get themselves in the chosen ten as well.

Bowser assured Peach that the millions of coins and thousands of gold bars that came in from this sale was put to good use. This year, apparently, all the costs were going to be split equally in the children's hospitals throughout the Darklands. The previous year, Bowser had told her, the money was put towards a thermal-heat generator which could crank out electricity from the mere heat of lava rivers, unlike most Darklandian generators which used the lava itself. Bowser said that the single generator the money had bought had, in turn, saved the country fourteen times its cost.

This year, Bowser, with Peach in tow, had so far 'opened' nine gifts. The first three were all statues cast in varying metals, posing Bowser as a ferocious and powerful koopa. The fourth was the Darkland's largest paper-Mache creation; a statue of him built by the students and families of a very lucky elementary school. The fifth was actually a donated wiggler farm, the sixth a beautiful fountain of lava with Bowser, flaming his breath to the sky with real fire, right in the center. The seventh was a very rare, very large, black diamond, carved to look like Bowser's armband and ferocious claw from a very wealthy individual. The eighth was a donated troop of circus ukikis which Bowser didn't seem to think was all that great, but Peach had an excellent time watching. The ninth that they had just left was another statue of Bowser, apparently which an amusement park was going to be built around, the rollercoaster spinning 'round the thirty-times-larger-than-life Koopa King.

In truth, the Mushroom Princess was enjoying herself more than anyone expected her to. Bowser's sarcastic sense of humor and bright attitude (he was no doubt thrilled to see monuments of himself cropping up all over his kingdom) was something she greatly enjoyed. The crowds were just as thrilled to see her in their presence as they were Bowser, and Peach had even spent almost an hour signing Peach dolls at the elementary school before Bowser whisked her away.

Peach put a delicate hand on her stomach as she felt it grumble. "Bowser?" She spoke up, "When are we going to eat?"

"The big lunch-party-thing is after this last acceptance thingy. If you want, though, we can get some food at this next town…I think they've got famous bread or something stupid like that."

Peach smiled. "That'd be nice. What's the town we're going to?"

Since Bowser wouldn't, and didn't, know the answer, the Hammer Bro answered for her. "It's Wheatfield Heights, yo' 'ighness. And 'ees majesty's right, zair famous fo' their cheese bread." He turned the clowncar to the right and began its decent. Peach thought she could almost make out the loud music and cheering of the huge crowd below. In the midst of the Darklandians was a huge bulking shape, covered with several sheets and tied as tightly as the townspeople could manage.

"Look's like you got another statue!" Peach told Bowser excitedly.

"I don't know why you're so excited. I get statues all the time; you've been in my palace all week, you should know that. I'm easily the most recognizable face in the world to my people."

Peach bit her lip a bit before replying, "You should still be honored. Statues...carving…sculpting…it's a big deal, a big honor! To think, simple, unimportant rocks and boulders can be shaped and molded to form something beautiful and recognizable. It's a big honor to be that one thing that inspires people to bring the earth to life, Bowser, it really is."

Bowser smirked at Peach, but his eyes held such reverence and adoration. "I love you, Peach."

Peach smirked back. "I know." She stared at him for a while, not realizing her smile seemed stuck on her face as she met his eyes. Peach broke the connection as she asked, "so you're going to appreciate the gift?"

Bowser shrugged, but smiled. "If they're going to make a statue out of anything, might as well be me."

"Not conceited at all, are you?" Peach laughed.

Bowser earnestly shook his head. "No, I'm thinking for my people. What's better than turning some ugly rock into the most sexy and handsome koopa to grace the planet? It would be a service to both that poor town and the rock, give them some worth, some bettering."

"Oh, so _that's_ why you have all those pictures and paintings and have all your furniture and walls in the shape of your face. It's for everyone _else_."

Bowser nodded. "Now you're thinking like a true ruler."

The clowncar touched down on the grassy knoll near the crowd of Darklandians and the huge covered mass. Peach could finally make out what some of the loud cheering consisted of. "It's _him_!" "He's here! He's actually _here!_" "Oh Jimmy dear, you'll never forget this day." "Look, Mama, look, that's his clowncar!" "Bowser!" "King Bowser!" "It's really him!"

Peach thought it odd that most of these calls and shouts were the exact same thing she expected to hear from her own people, the same exact things they always said when he touched down in _their_ lands, albeit to kidnap Peach. The difference was that these cries were not in fear, were not in panic, but in love and adoration. They praised the day this koopa stepped on their town's soil; Peach had no question that the raffle results brought days and nights of joy and partying.

Bowser stood, allowing himself to be seen and the crowd certainly allowed themselves to be heard. He grinned at himself before bending down to help Peach out of the clowcar.

When Peach was made visible, the crowd seemed to have mixed reactions. On one end, it was quickly hushed. Many other members had no shock but only cheered louder. "It's clear who watches the news and not, isn't it?" Bowser grumbled in Peach's ear with a bit of a smile. "The ones that got all quiet had no clue you'd come too…the other ones took the time to find out that you'd attended the other nine freaking ceremonies we've had so far today."

The two of them walked towards the mayor, a tall and green shy guy, who eagerly gripped Bowser's claw and turned his mask towards the crowd as cameras flashed. "A pleasure to finally meet you, sire! You have no idea how much Wheatfield Heights have been looking forward to this day. And let me wish you a very Happy Birthday!" He shook Bowser's claw vigorously until Bowser's vice-like grip told him it was time to let go. The mayor bowed low to Bowser before rushing over to Peach, his robe flapping up as he ran.

"My dear Princess, what an honor to meet you, as well! I've heard much about you, is it true you're here on vacation? Taking a liking to the Darklands, yes?" Peach felt almost as if the mayor was planning on shaking her arm off, but still tried a smile. As it had been in the other cities she and Bowser had visited, lights flashed in her face the moment the smile graced it.

Bowser cleared his throat, making the mayor jump off of Peach as if she had a sparky in her palm. "Mayor whatever-your-name-is, can we get on with this? We've got a lunch to be at soon."

Peach was sure the mayor was smiling under his mask and he leapt from their side and gave a flourishing bow. "Of course, my liege! We understand, we understand. You're the busiest koopa there ever could be, the best koopa there ever could be, I'd be shocked if you weren't busy!"

Bowser waved a claw and him and grumbled, "just get on with it."

"Of course, of course! You just move a bit to the left…here, I'll help…oh, you come too, Princess! A nice group shot before we move on. Yes, yes, that'll do just fine. Oh, perhaps you should move a bit more, sire, there you go…" the mayor seemed more like an anxious flower arranger than a mayor as he shifted the royalty and himself for more pictures and 'a perfect view of the perfect gift for the perfect king!'. Finally, he seemed satisfied and raised his green hands for a drum roll.

A line of red shy guys latched on to the sheet as dozens more surrounded the cloaked statue, each firmly gripping a rope. On the mayor's signal, they all pulled and the sheet billowed off to the far right.

Bowser looked up at the statue, his normal face of indifference melting away as he stared up at the statue…or rather, the two statues.

In the finest of marble and three times larger than life, King Bowser looked different than he had in all the other portrayals Peach had seen that day. He looked almost gentle, his lips curved in a sweet smile and his stone eyes almost glistening. The rather un-Bowser-like expression followed through to his arms and claws, one of which was delicately holding a delicate shoulder from the statue marble-Bowser was gazing at, the other claw holding the other statue's equally delicate hand.

The other statue, also gazing into the eyes of its partner, was none other than Peach.

The princess in marble was almost as delicate as she was in reality, her hair billowing just slightly, her dress following suit. Her smile was close-lipped, but tender and continued through her stone eyes. Both her delicate hands were in marble-Bowser's strong claw and her form seemed to mesh with his in perfect balance and fit. It was obvious they had been carved together, for each other.

Peach's eyes were glistening with emotion and her heart swelled as she saw herself and Bowser in stone form…they had somehow captured the look she so loved to see in his face almost perfectly. They hadn't been able to encase the radiating love and happiness he always held, or the amusement that danced in his eyes just below the many layers of pure love. They hadn't been able to show his natural warmth or his gentle, yet firm touch…but it was still a beautiful statue that showed Peach most of what she loved to see in Bowser.

She looked over just to the side to see the king himself; his eyes were glued on the statues. He too looked almost on the verge of tears and obviously hadn't yet realized how weak he was being in front of his people and the television cameras. Bowser rubbed his own hands as if wishing to feel Peach in them; he gazed over his expression and smiled. Bowser looked over at Peach and, with a start, she almost forgot who she was staring at. If it wasn't for the radiating love and happiness in his expression and the amusement dancing in his eyes, Peach would have thought she was still staring at the statue.

He opened his mouth slightly, but Peach noticed that as his jaw quivered he couldn't quite form words. Her heart flopped as she watched him and looked into his face and whispered, "I know," an answer to his unspoken confession.

Although her shoes felt leaden and her dress sopping wet, Peach somehow managed to drag herself over to Bowser. He put a reassuring claw on her shoulder and she tipped her gloved hands into his free one. She gazed up at him with a closed, but full smile, saying so many things without a single word. His smile opened just slightly as he gazed back, telling her even more.

Cameras began to flash as they documented Bowser's most boast-free, most quiet, and obviously happiest acceptance of the day thus far. The cameramen had a heyday arranging the shot. Bowser and Peach had unknowingly arranged themselves as exact replicas of the statue they were in front of, posing.

xxxx0o0o0o0o0o0o0xxxx

Peach was munching happily on some fresh Wheatfield Heights bread, pleasantly aware of, yet ignoring, Bowser's gaze. He smiled at her as she tore at the bread, watching his beautiful princess master and compromise grace and starvation. She pecked one last time at the loaf before tenderly wrapping it in the plastic it had come in. Peach turned to Bowser now that she was done and curiously said, "you were really different than I expected back there."

"What d'ye mean?"

"I mean…well, all day you were gloating about how powerful and mighty you looked in your statues you got. And the last one…well, it wasn't exactly a battle scene." Peach seemed to be blushing, but Bowser only grinned.

"Might as well have been. I've fought more battles for you than for my lands combined."

His remark almost seemed to hurt Peach as she avoided his gaze. "So that's all that was to you? Your winning standard? I mean, those people who built it…they didn't know about…they only know…they…" but she couldn't seem to bring herself to admit that she _had_ grown closer to Bowser in just one week. She couldn't seem to bring herself to say any words, actually.

Bowser quickly shook his head. "No, Peach, you don't get it. A few of the other statues had me after I had just won something. That was a different kind of happy…a very different kind of happy. The kind of happy those wheat-people gave statue-me…I could only ever have that kind of happiness from one place, one person. Yeah, it wasn't a powerful me they showed, yeah, it wasn't threatening me, or mighty me, or even King me. But it was a happy me, the kind of me that those saps in Wheatfield Heights like imagining me as. Why do you think their bread is cheesy? It rubs off onto it.

"The kind of happiness I get from you is the happiest happy I ever know. It's a different kind of happy than everything else there could ever be in the world…and those sappy shy guys at that wheat place want me to be that kind of happy. They realize that can only come through one way, so they made that one way. Frankly, I'm glad they put you in it. You're the only thing that could improve a town after me- they chose well."

Peach sighed. Bowser's words hadn't turned her heart or emptied her stomach like they often did lately, but she got a feeling that was because she was pushing those feelings away. She couldn't let herself feel that way, not when she was confused. "But Bowser…you hate looking weak. And you …back there…well…"

Bowser avoided Peach's eyes and sighed, the wind tussling his red mane and breathing over his horns. "Yeah…but people always talk about love being the most important power in the world. Someone would have to be as strong and powerful as me to not get steamrolled with loving you. Everyone has a weakness, and since it's not like people are can stuff it in my face to get power, might as well let them know what it is."

"What…what is it then?"

Bowser looked over at her, raising a bushy eyebrow, surprised she even had to ask. "You, duh. I love you."

All the emotion Peach had held back in her confusion broke the dam and she felt a million pounds heavier and yet a million pounds lighter. Even in such a sarcastic manner, Bowser's words rung with such truth and clarity that Peach always needed so badly. _That_ was why she loved that statue. _That_ was why she couldn't tear her eyes off it, except to see the same expression in the flesh. She needed to know she was loved, she loved to know she was loved, and Bowser could give that to her without even trying.

Bowser saw her close her eyes and lean back, almost as if bathing in the sunlight. She was clearly considered his latest remark. "I know, Bowser, I know," she slurred, but smiled. She really did look to be bathing in an invisible bath, so much, in fact, that Bowser almost felt awkward, as if he was invading her privacy.

"Er, do you want me to go…or something?" He didn't know why he should, but she looked like she wanted the keep this peace that had suddenly overcome her. But Peach's smile turned to a frown at his question and she shook her head. Bowser's heart overflowed with adoration and happiness. _She didn't want him to go!_ What a beautiful thought! Bowser smiled, his happiness spreading through his body as he realized Peach's state _was_ due to him…maybe she loved him the way he'd been telling people all along.

He shuffled over to Peach, but awkwardly stood next to her as she breathed in the passing air. He loved her and wasn't stupid enough to ignore that something was growing in her for him, but pushing the envelope was the last thing he wanted to do. He had waited for years and years and years for her…he could wait a bit longer.

But she looked too tempting, sitting there, as if bathing. Bathing in _him_.

Bowser sat next to Peach, his eyes glued on her face, and placed a warm claw on her knee, splayed out to one side. He then closed his own eyes and leaned back next to her, smelling her sweet essence and feeling her kneecap just under the cotton sundress.

A flash of light reflected from the sun off of Peach's jewelry and encompassed them in a warm, blue glow. But neither saw the gem's magic light as their eyes were closed and their thoughts far, far from reality…and yet only an inch or two away.

* * *

**Author's Note: **So did you think it was weird too? Or am I imagining things:P I dunno. But at least the weirdness came with some fluff, eh?

Next chapter's fun. :) We get another side-story introduced (-hears moans in the distance- sorry, but I like 'em!) and it has some really fun moments. I enjoyed writing it. There's some fluff, but this chapter really took the romantic aspect more than next one...but there's plenty of koopalings in the next one, so...trade-off? I dunno. :P

-Razzi


	20. Searching the Faces

**Foreword:** Hick, am I ever late! D: So sorry, guys...I didn't finish 21 yet because I was so late. School's been a lot more of a dog than I thought it would be. Grr.

Anyway, I think this chapter's fun. It's pretty light-hearted, and has a certain bounce to it. I like it. :) A good break for me between chapters I don't like...gah like the last two and this new one. Oh, and to be warned- there's French in this chapter. But if you don't know French, please don't bother rushing to babelfish. You don't need to understand...it might even be more fun if you don't. ;)

But anyway! Enjoy reading, and remember I still don't own Mario and crew.

* * *

Daisy looked over her linguini at Mario, fiddling with his fork. He was clearly enjoying the pasta- he had that look on his face he got every time he ate it- but there was some luster lacking from his eyes. And between bites, Daisy swore she could hear him sigh with something other than satisfaction.

Daisy stood up, her chair jumping back with a screech. She mumbled "excuse me," almost as if the manners had been beaten into her so hard she didn't even realize she was following them. "Luigi, can you come out to the hallway with me for a bit?" she asked in full voice.

The brothers looked up at her, Luigi nodding before following her out the room. Mario looked from Daisy to his pasta and a smile spread back across his face as he dug back in…yet his gaze was still distant.

"What is it-a?" Luigi asked in a hushed voice as they got to the hallway.

Daisy leaned against the wall and flicked her head towards the closed dining room door. "Mario. What's his deal today?"

"You noticed-a too?" Luigi made an unpleasant face under his mustache. "I-a think he's-a bored."

"Bored?" Daisy looked almost hurt. "But we just finished a 2-hour game of tennis. He creamed us! He should be thrilled right now!"

Luigi shook his head. "Not-a short-time bored-a. Long-a-time. He's-a not had an adventure for-a long-a-time and I-a think, if he's-a still bored when-a we get to-a Grand Canal, he'll-a be miserable for all of us-a."

"But Mario loves Grand Canal! Every time we go he's having more fun than most of us combined! Same with tennis- I haven't seen him so low about it for years."

Luigi shook his head again. "You are not-a understanding, Daisy. Vacation is-a not enough to-a peak Mario's long-a-time boredom."

Daisy rolled her eyes. "What's more long-term than a week-long vacation? I would think it'd cheer anyone up!"

Luigi shook his head. "Mario doesn't-a work like everyone else-a."

"But last time he was in a slump, he and Peach went to Isle Delfino and you told me yourself he was 'all-a better'. Shouldn't this be the same?" Luigi shook his head, but before he could answer, Daisy hissed, "would you stop that?"

Luigi looked a bit flustered. He apologized before continuing. "Think of all-a the times we've-a been to Grand-a Canal. What-a always happens?"

Daisy bit her lip as she thought. "Well, Bowser usually gets involved somehow, ruining it for everyone."

Luigi pursed his lips as if considering a bargain and gave a head nod that seemed a mix of nodding and shaking. "Alright-a, fine. Now, what-a usually happens when-a we play tennis?"

"Uh, there's usually explosions and danger going on everywhere. And lots of time, some stupid villain makes the whole thing horrible."

Luigi gave the same head nod before continuing, "and-a what-a happened at-a Isle Delfino before-a Peach and-a Mario's vacation?"

"Peach got kidnapped by Bowser Junior and Mario had to…" Daisy's face lit up as she finally understood. Not bothering to finish her answer to Luigi's question, she demanded, "so you think that Mario's in a slump because he hasn't adventured lately?"

"Si! The-a last adventure was-a few months ago. He will-a only get-a worse unless something happens."

"So what do you think we should do?" Daisy knew, just as Luigi did, that if Mario was sour during the double-date style vacation they had planned, things would only get colder between the princess and the plumber. Daisy had noticed that as Mario's adventures began to revolve around things other than Peach his interest had begun to wane, but she knew he wasn't so shallow as to like her _only_ as his damsel in distress. Sometimes, when Peach adventured at his side, he seemed to glow for her again.

Regarding Daisy's question thoughtfully, Luigi only shook his head in dismay. "It's-a not like we can-a make an adventure for-a him and-a make him-a risk his-a life for a bogus cause."

Daisy's face lit up and seeing it do so made Luigi's pale. "Luigi, that's a fantastic idea!"

Luigi shook his head violently. He had forgotten that Daisy wouldn't take no for an answer…ever. "I-a didn't say anything, Daisy. Nothing is-a good idea, there is-a no idea…" But Daisy certainly didn't think so. She grabbed Luigi fiercely by the arm and began to drag him down the hall, chattering on about various ideas to help get Mario out of his adventure-needing slump, each more ridiculous and life-threatening than the next. "Daisy," Luigi tried, but the princess wasn't letting any words in edgewise.

He looked back nervously at the dining room door, Mario still alone and eating his linguine behind it. "Daisy, what about-a Mario?"

Daisy turned to look at Luigi as she tried to pull him along. "Well, we're doing this _for_ him, aren't we? He'll be perfectly sa-"

"No, I-a mean right-a now. He's-a still in-a the room!"

Daisy stopped pulling long enough to look back. She sighed once before pulling with even more vigor. "He'll be fine! He'll finish his pasta and when he realizes we're gone, he'll just think we snuck off somewhere to make-out or something."

"I-a really don't-a think he'd-a think that…"

Daisy sounded almost annoyed as she hissed, "Well, it's not like I'm kidnapping you or anything!" But the pain pushing into Luigi's arm as her fingernails dug past her glove and his shirt made him think otherwise. "Mario will be _fine_. You just don't want to help!"

Luigi groaned, knowing he couldn't fight her now. He let Daisy pull him along, looking back at the closed door and longing for the half-full plate of pasta he had been forced to abandon.

xxxx0o0o0o0o0o0o0xxxx

Iggy crawled through the dark ventilation system, following Lemmy's tail closely, still unsure of why they had let Lemmy lead in the first place. Just to add to his annoyance, when Lemmy abruptly stopped he felt the extremely uncomfortable pain as Wendy's horns slammed into his backside.

Wendy, who had been staring at the ground as she crawled, had no idea of the hold-up. She, too, got her tail ran into by Larry. Ignoring the pain, she narrowed her eyes at the brothers in front of her. "What's the hold up?"

Nervously, Lemmy mumbled, "It's really dark…"

"You _just_ noticed that?" Iggy asked, his voice dripping with frustration.

"No," Lemmy growled, "it's just…darker up here. I think we're in the wall now."

From a few koopalings back, Lemmy could hear Roy instruct, "use a fiyah! Use a fiya if the dark is that bad, Lemster!" Roy was used to the dark…often his sunglasses were as dark as this tunnel anyway.

"But there isn't any wood!" Lemmy dully complained.

"_There isn't any wood?_" Wendy hissed. "Are you a koopaling or not? _Breathe_ some fire!"

Uncomforably, Lemmy mumbled an "okay", fully aware that he might not be able to do it right. "Iggy," he whispered, turning his head as much as the small space could allow, "can you help me?"

Iggy narrowed his eyes. "Lemmy, I can hardly move my own claws. Do you really think I could help you? Just try it! Glottell up your throat, raise your soft palate, widen your tounge, take a deep breath, and just focus, okay?"

Lemmy, following the instructions best he could, only managed to hack a rather large loogie. Wendy squealed in disgust at the noise and Morton, as far back as he was in the line, guffawed loudly.

The feeble attempt at fire only upset Iggy more as he considered that they were actually _trusting_ this dolt to lead them to the Great Bowser Day Luncheon…and to get away from the "watchful" eyes of Kammy, currently covered by her eyelids as she slept.

But even when Lemmy was annoying and seemingly helpless, he was still Iggy's brother and often one of his favorites. Iggy shook his head slowly, careful not to ruin his perfect Mohawk. "Lemmy…just…think hard about it. Let your throat heat up and just…think hard."

Lemmy inhaled deeply and focused, focused so hard he felt his entire face heat up in pain. Finally he exhaled, a rather mediocre flame shooting out of his mouth. It followed a thin line of moss along the ground until it hit a solid stone wall, catching on the moss's source and flickering long enough for them to follow.

Lemmy felt about to burst with pride, and Iggy was grinning just behind him. Behind Iggy, however, Wendy was loudly sighing. "Lemmy made fire. Woo hoo. Can we move now?"

In silent response, Lemmy crawled forward, towards the flickering moss at the end of the tunnel and over the dying flames on the floor. When they reached the moss, the tunnel seemed to dead end, but the cool air coming up from under Lemmy's claws told him otherwise. "Guys…there's a vent here, but nothing else."

Iggy peered around his younger brother to see for certain what he was saying. Nodding in agreement, Iggy shouted for them to all back up, his voice echoing around the metal walls of the air conditioning system. He cringed, realizing that shouting right next to what would hopefully take them to the luncheon probably wasn't the best idea.

The train of koopalings attempted to crawl backwards, hissing in pain and complaining as they trampled over each other. Finally Lemmy had his space and pried the vent-catch with his claw, making Iggy cringe again when the vent door creaked open louder than seemed possible, swinging down and squeaking left and right.

"Should I…should I go down?" Lemmy asked nervously. Larry cheered from back behind, "go on, Lemmy, just do it!" Lemmy gulped and tumbled headfirst down…down…and down again until he landed, luckily for him, on a large pile of freshly-baked bread loaves.

Iggy stuck his head through the vent and whispered loudly, "is it safe?" He saw Lemmy nod and so, with just a moment of hesitation, tumbled down the drop to the bread pile. He sat up, readjusting his glasses, and gasped before hunching back down. He looked through his fingers, seeing Lemmy still upright, and pulled him down too.

Lemmy had, unknowingly, led them right to the middle of the outdoor kitchen for the luncheon. Koopas scurried all around them, yelling and shouting directions as they prepared for the lunch. Thankfully, their hectic movements had made Lemmy and Iggy's decent unnoticed, but he couldn't promise that Wendy, Larry, Roy, and Morton would be as lucky…even if Bowser Junior and Ludwig had stayed behind; six koopalings were hard to hide.

He had forgotten that the four above them had no idea about the danger until he felt Wendy crash on top of him. It didn't take _her_ long to realize the trouble they were in and she immediately began smacking her brothers over the head. Wendy turned around, trying to motion for Larry and Morton to stay in the vent system, but the brothers only took her hand signs as a motion to hurry up.

With hushed shouts of dismay, the koopalings all toppled out and on top of each other and onto the bread. Iggy realized quickly that burrowing farther in the now-ruined bread would do them no good, and began to hiss instructions to crawl away from the crime scene as fast as possible.

The koopalings had just barely made it to the kitchen's other wall, masked in shadow, when a koopa chef with a long, curling mustache squealed. "Zut alors!" He screeched, rushing over to the mangled bread and picking them up, sobbing as he shouted, "Le pain est ruiné ! Qui ruinerait soixante pains de pain? Soixante! Les pains! _Soixante!_ Ohh sacré bleu…" He hunched over, sobbing as he felt each loaf.

The koopalings stared wide-eyed as the koopa's face changed from depression to aggression in seconds, the loaf in his hand crumbling as even his mustache seemed to curl in anger. "Je dois trouve qui a fait ceci! Et je les tuers! _Tuez-les!_"

The other cooks seemed unaware that the bread-chef was making death threats to no one in particular- apparently it was commonplace in the kitchen. None of the koopalings were very affected by the chef's words either, having no clue what he was rambling on about. They did, however, recognize the expression and knew they had to get away from him as soon as possible.

They quickly began crawling towards the carts of food ready to be sent to those at the luncheon, but the furious chef saw them first.

"Voilá les diables! Je vais vous tuer!" His face was twisted in a strange, eccentric and murderous look as he spun towards the cook on his left, chopping celery. "Jacques! Donnez-moi un couteau!" The cook, without even turning around to see the angry French koopa, grabbed a bread knife and handed it over his shoulder. Clearly _he_ understood his words, even if the koopalings didn't.

The koopalings saw the glint of the knife and quickly crawled faster, as fast as they could. They still had no clue what he was saying -he could have been offering them buckets of candy and ice cream- but the knife in his murderous-looking hands was enough to make them run for the hills anyway.

Quickly, the koopalings leapt under the white cloths covering the cart. Morton just barely missed the chef's flying knife, but didn't miss his cutting screams of "Zut, zut et zut!" as the knife hit the grass several feet away instead of Morton.

The chef, unaware which cart each koopaling was under, walked towards them all, saying in a sing-song voice, "Venez ici, mes petits diables! Je n'ai pas des pains pour les sandwiches, et alors je vais employer _vous_ à la place! C'est bon, n'est pas?"

Lemmy was shuddering as he heard, above the clatter of the busy kitchen, the chef approaching his very own cart. He rocked back and forth, clutching his knees as he made a plan in his head. _Just…think hard about it. Let your throat heat up and just…think hard…_

The chef smirked as he saw the white cloth covering the food cart he was approaching quiver. He gripped his new knife tighter as he stepped closer and closer. Finally, he bent down and lifted up the cloth with one hand, knife held high in his other. "Bonjour!"

Instead of the screams he expected in reply, the chef received a faceful of the biggest fireball he had ever seen, curling and licking all around him. He jumped back in horror, screaming some French curse at the top of his lungs and dancing around, flames covering his entire body. "Je suis flambé! Je suis flambé! _Aidez-moi!_"

Larry poked his head out of his cart, saw the clearly distracted chef, and leapt out, shouting, "run! Run _now_!" The koopalings eagerly followed him out of the kitchen and as far as they could. They ran towards the countless rows of chairs and picnic blankets that surrounded a stage, not even caring about stealth anymore.

They ran and ran and ran until they finally crashed next to a small family of shy guys. Morton was flat on his back panting, Larry crashed on his own face, and Iggy was leaning on Lemmy who, like Wendy, was panting doubled over.

The shy guys looked at the koopalings questioningly and almost in fright. Indeed, the baby shy guy began to cry under its mask and the mother picked it up defensively. After he had recovered, Larry walked over to the family, Roy just behind him. The father shy guy looked simply terrified. Although the Darklandians would all recognize the koopalings, seeing them in person was a bit frightening, what with their prankster reputation and all.

Larry looked at them all, their fearful faces hidden by masks, but ignored any teasing he might have usually done to such a frightened family. With every ounce of his voice dripping with exhaustion, he asked, "could you tell us what's happened so far? We missed the first half of the luncheon and-"

"No…no…no speak eenglish…" the father shy guy told them with a heavy accent.

Rolling his eyes under his askew sunglasses, Roy shouted to no one in particular, "Does _anyone_ nowadays? Seriously!"

The koopalings were easily cramped from their crawl through the Volcanopalace ventilation system, their fall onto a pile of bread, their panicked run from a knife-wielding koopa, and their lengthy sprint from the outdoor kitchen to the luncheon. They collapsed as close to the stage as they could get without having to show a paid ticket and strained their eyes and ears.

Although Bowser's birthday luncheon taking place on the stage was broadcast on televisions two stories high and with speakers just as large, the koopalings still could hardly tell the difference between Peach and the pink goomba she was sitting next to, not to mention could hardly make out a single word in the speech being given.

It didn't take long for Roy to understand why a family that didn't speak or understand a lick of English would bother coming…even if you _could_ understand English perfectly, there wasn't much point even trying from their distance.

xxxx0o0o0o0o0o0o0xxxx

Bowser Junior leaned back in his chair, munching pleasantly on an éclair. A bit of the soft cream inside it dripped onto his bandana hanging around his neck, but he didn't really care. He had been ordered by his older siblings to sit and "watch Kammy" while they escaped to see the luncheon. Although he had at first been more than disgruntled with being left out, as he watched them file back into the room, he wasn't so sorry he missed the adventure.

Each koopaling was now sporting at least one new, fine bruise from attempting to get through the crowd and back into the palace, and many had hefty scrapes on their knees from trying to bypass security and fit all of them through the secret entrances in the palace. Morton's stomach grumbled greedily as he saw Junior's éclair and Roy felt his mouth water slightly. Having no paid tickets, the koopalings completely missed out on the luncheon lunch.

Junior looked them all over, his expression smug. He followed their eyes to the television, now showing a commercial for BreathStink's new onion-flavored mint. He grinned at them, gloating, "so while you guys were gone, I was channel surfing and guess what I found?" Roy's eye was twitching, and the rest of them seemed too beaten to even ask 'what'. Greedy for gloating, Junior continued, "I saw the luncheon! It was on the Bowser Channel. Great, wasn't it?

"My _favorite_ part was probably that _excellent_ speech that one magikoopa gave about Papa. They had a nice close-up of Mama Peach too, she kept looking at Papa. Although I have to say, the little speech Papa gave was pretty cool too. Wish I remembered what he said." Junior grinned at them, Morton's eyes still locked on the éclair. Junior was trying to make it clear that he _did _remember what his father said but had no intention of telling them…but they seemed distracted by their hunger, so he tried a different approach.

"Good éclairs, aren't they? Rich chocolate…flaky and decedent bread surrounding the perfect medley of sweet and soft cream… I mean, you guys must have got them too. You _must_ know how absolutely amazing they are.

"Since I couldn't go to the luncheon, Cookoopa felt bad and sent up the whole meal. Didn't ask where you guys were; you should have got your meal at the luncheon anyway. The sandwiches were excellent; I heard they ran out of bread so I was lucky to get some.

"I don't usually like salad, but the fruit salad was great, don't you think? Freshest fruit I've had for awhile…sweet and juicy, with a nice snap and yet so supple." His grin spread wider as his siblings looked helplessly at him, Roy's eye still twitching and Lemmy's lazy one locked on the éclair.

Junior smugly continued, "It's a good thing you guys got to see the luncheon. I wouldn't have missed a single word! We'll have _loads_ to use on Mama Peach for the bet now, won't we? She seemed to really enjoy it too. Super fun, best televised event for Papa's Birthday they've had in years.

"The cameraman said he had to use maximum zoom, and he was in one of the most expensive seats! Good thing you guys snuck in…the nosebleed seats looked just horrible." He grinned at them all before jumping off the couch and, licking the éclair's chocolate off his fingers, left the room.

The koopalings eyes all narrowed and, speaking apparently for everyone, Roy mumbled, "whoevah's fricken idea dat was…dey's gonna hear from me." He half walked, half stumbled over to the now vacant couch, ignoring the fact that he had actually come up with over half the plan. "Aftah I wake up."

xxxx0o0o0o0o0o0o0xxxx

Peach was feeling much better, now that she was full. She smiled at the crowds as the koopacar drove her and Bowser back to the palace. The people all around them were just as thrilled as they could be to see them so close.

The magikoopa assisting them during the luncheon had enchanted the car to repel anxious fans when they got too close, but that didn't stop them from shouting and cheering. She turned to Bowser, also looking out at the crowd. He caught her elated gaze and heard her say, "This is so exciting! Do they do this every time you leave the palace?"

"Sometimes. Bowser Day is the biggest through…I'm always instantly more exciting and fantastic on my birthday, so naturally, everyone wants to get a good look."

"I guess I get more attention than usual on my birthday too, a bit…" Peach agreed. But unlike the Darklandians, the people of the Mushroom Kingdom saw Peach as their sister, their friend, their link to government. That was, of course, the way the Princess had worked for generations- in front of the curtain that all the hard work was being done behind. So she wasn't greeted like a celebrity…that wasn't the way the government wanted her to be seen.

The Darklands worked completely differently. Bowser _was_ supposed to be seen as a celebrity- loved, adored, and idolized. Perhaps that way anything he did harshly would be still seen as wonderful. Perhaps it was just government corruption…but there was something in their cheers of joy that hinted that perhaps Bowser really _was_ this fantastic to them.

"So Peach," Bowser began, grabbing her attention away from the hordes of Darklandians and seas of cameras. "Do you wanna open family presents with us? That's next, I think…after my 'acceptation' of all the gifts I got so far."

Peach's smile opened wide and she nodded. "I'd love that!"

Bowser's heart swelled at her excitement. "Good…good…I'll tell Kammy to bring the koopalings down to the Private Great Hall with their gifts. You can head down there, I guess, while I do the accepting…thing."

He waited for Peach's nod before standing up in the koopacar and addressing the crowd. "Hey, you rotters! How've you liked Bowser Day so far?"

The Darklandians answered in a swelling cheer. Peach laughed to herself as she watched Bowser bask in their adoration, the car still driving them towards the Palace doors.

"Yeah, it has been pretty fantastic, hasn't it? Know why? Because it's _my_ birthday! And my birthday is always fantastic!" More cheers. Bowser's wide grin closed just a bit before he continued, his voice just as enthusiastic but somehow a bit softer. "This year is especially wonderful though, because I get to share it with the tied-for-first most-wonderful person in the world." He looked over at Peach with a smile before continuing. "Can she hear a proper Darklands cheer?"

Sound erupted like Peach couldn't imagine it ever could. Roars, stomps, cheers, applause, shouts, screams, all sorts of noise surrounded them. Her ears vibrated and Peach couldn't even hear her own laughter.

As if spurred by the eruption of noise, the ginormous doors of the Volcanopalace slowly and gracefully swung open, thousands of engraved images seemingly bowing and allowing them passage. Bowser grinned at the continuing noise, his mighty claws on his sides as his chest pumped out. His mane tussled just a bit and Peach noticed how perfectly his bushy eyebrows matched his roguish, bright eyes. His wristbands sparkled as the last bit of sunlight sparkled on them. The light made him look like a picture of majesty, the essence of royalty.

The koopacar was now completely through the huge doors and Peach could see scores of the beefiest baddies gripping huge ropes, slowly giving slack to let the mighty doors close. Bowser turned to the princess and quietly said, "Peach, come here for a sec."

She tentatively stood up. Even in her high-heels, she only came up to about Bowser's neck. He swung a mighty arm around her side, pulling her close, but left her plenty of freedom to move. In fact, Peach felt strangely free but secure in his grip, seeming to fit perfectly. Like the koopa king, she began to wave to the crowd whilst the doors shut.

For one last final show, Bowser held his breath and expelled it in a mighty, magnificent breath of flame. The audience's cheer was roused back to a deafening volume until, with a slam even audible over the Darklandians, the doors shut.

Peach looked up at Bower, still in his protective grip, and smiled wide. "That was really fun!"

He cocked an eyebrow and said, "Yeah?" He smiled and squeezed her lightly. "Thought you'd like it." Although Bowser knew he had to let go if he wanted their day to continue, he really, _really_ didn't want to. Who knew how long it would be until he could stand like this, Peach fitting into his side perfectly, and the both of them happy?

Peach, surprising Bowser immensely, completed his hold by putting her other hand on his chest and pushing into him in some strange sort of half-hug. She inhaled his scent and let him complete his embrace with his other arm and fill his worried mind with pure ecstasy. Whether she had been reading his mind or simply caught up in the moment, it didn't matter. She was in his arms, of her own freewill, and fitting even better than before.

"I love you, ya know." Bowser whispered into her blonde hair.

She smiled against his chest and looked up at his calm expression. "I know." She blinked. "Happy Birthday, Bowser."

xxxx0o0o0o0o0o0o0xxxx

Bowser had separated to find Kamek for the acception, walking with a noticeable spring in his step, leaving Peach on her own to get to the Private Great Hall. She was walking there when a thought crossed her mind- she still had no gift for Bowser!

Of _course_ he'd brush that off with something like 'you being here is a gift enough', or 'you're coming with me to the Ball, that's all I could ever ask for' or something like that, but…that didn't seem enough. Peach rubbed her necklace as she pondered what she could find within the next few minutes that would actually be _worth_ it.

The only thing she knew Bowser actually needed was probably new sheets. _The ones on his bed were horrible!_ She remembered with a laugh. Then there was his recommendation from earlier…far earlier…but no. Peach couldn't give Bowser _that_. A…a kiss was far, far too deep for her. She…she…no, she just couldn't. There was nothing, not even a week like she had had so far, that could convince her she could. Peach kissing Bowser was never, ever going to be an option. Especially not for a silly gift!

Peach walked with her hand caressing the necklace as she thought. _What would Bowser want?_ With a smile, Peach considered that even a ball of lint would become Bowser's most prized possession if it had a "from Peach" tag on it. But no…he needed something he was worth. Something only she could give him that he could treasure and she would give; and in doing so, actually be giving him a bit of her. Something he was worth…

Peach took off running towards her room, screaming the directions in her head as to not get lost. True, gift openings wouldn't start until after the public acceptation…thing, but Peach had an assumption that Bowser would do that as fast as he possibly could. There was no time to lose.

Luckily, the bedrooms, including Peach's, were located in the more private part of the Palace, so the Private Great Hall was only a few halls down from her room. If she was lucky, she wouldn't even be late.

Peach got into her room, feet searing hot from the run in high-heels. She looked around the room from her vanity, to her bed, to her still-sealed suitcase, to her wardrobe. Peach smiled, knowing she had finally thought of it. Something Bowser could treasure, that only Peach could give him. Something of worth, but worth even more coming from her.

Ignoring the pleads of pity from her feet, she ran to the vanity. She shuffled through her sewing kit and, with a victorious grin, pulled out a seam-ripper. Peach spun on her heels towards her victim, a hard, blazing look in her eyes. She had found her gift, whether it liked it or not.

* * *

**Author's Note: **Know what's really weird? I'm a little bit excited to end the story so I can start a new one, since I've grown in understanding the characters I'd be able to write them better next time. And I'm too stubborn about keeping characters constant to improve now in this story. XD

Next chapter is fun again. A little tiny bit dragging, but really fun for me. And Peach gets a nice little bit too, which I think you guys will like.

Speaking of you guys, thanks so much for the lovely reviews last chapter! C: That was such a fantastic batch I was just thrilled. Sorry for making you wait so long for this one, and here's to a shorter wait for 21!

-Razzi


	21. True Gifts

**Foreword:** So last chapter I warned you that I didn't like 21. But it isn't as bad as I remember, so...that's good:D It actually has fluff in it at the very end. We haven't had that for too long! That's not saying this is like...the best chapter ever or anything...but it's fun. Peach is fun.

I won't bother you much longer, go ahead and read. Sorry it took this long to get it up!

And as a disclaimer, nothing's mine still.

* * *

Kammy's dream was a lot more vivid than usual. Usually, like most magikoopas, she dreamed of her subconscious, everything on her mind blurred together as if a casserole. Over the years she had gained the ability to focus more, sometimes even solving problems in her sleep she could never face in reality.

Today she was sorting over a problem with Bowser and, as she tried to focus her dream, his face grew more and more vivid. His booming voice was more and more clear. She had almost clarified his face to the point where she could make out his pupils when his voice began to be crystal-clearly shouting insults at her.

She frowned and rustled in her sleep, murmuring "no, no, that's not right…" as she tried to refocus her dream. Against her wishes, his insults were only getting clearer and his face less. Then, with a stinging pain in her arm, Kammy awoke and her vision instantly changed from a muddy blend of a vauge Bowser's face to the real one, very real indeed as he scowled at her, his claws inches from the part of her arm he had just pinched.

"Hey hag, how're the kids doing?" He glowered at her. "I suppose you were playing hide-and-go-seek for the last few hours and you got a bit carried away counting?"

Kammy rustled uncomfortably under Bowser's gaze. She knew she was in more trouble than she could imagine…dozing off on the job earned her a big enough flagging- not watching Bowser's kids was as bad as treason. "Er, sire…"

He glared at her, his eyes burning and his mouth as well; smoke trailing out of his nose. "You'd better get all eight of them in the Private Main Hall in two minutes or I'll burn you so badly your _ashes_ will evaporate." He gave her another threatening snarl before turning around and…and _leaving_.

Kammy sat up in her easy chair. "Wait, your dreadfulness?" What was going on? A threat and only one insult? That was an easier lay-off than she got for walking on the wrong side of the hallway the week before!

Bowser's mane bristled as he turned around to face his magikoopa assistant. "Yes?" he seethed.

"Well I…I…um…don't you think…"

Bowser obviously knew what she seemed worried about. He raised a bushy eyebrow and said, "Do you really want me to give you the punishment you deserve, you worthless witch?"

"Er…no, I think I'm good…"

Bowser glared at her, his eyes flicking to the huge clock nearby. "Then you'd better get moving. You've got a minute-fifteen."

Kammy blinked as Bowser stormed down the hall and out of the room. He was obviously furious, but something was stopping him from being the normal unfeeling tyrant he usually was when angry. She concluded that it must be Peach…even if he wasn't skipping down the halls love-struck, her very presence was influencing him.

She thought it was ironic; the woman Kammy hated so much was the reason she still had all her limbs. Kammy shook her head a little bit before teleporting away to find the koopalings. Even if the king was happy…best not to push it. He wasn't one to give any lee-way.

xxxx0o0o0o0o0o0o0xxxx

Daisy ran into her room, Luigi just behind her, as she rambled on about something he couldn't quite catch. Finally in her room she stopped abruptly, Luigi crashing into her just a bit. Daisy didn't notice, or didn't care, because she just told him to find the phonebook.

"Where is it-a?" He asked, scanning the yellow bedroom for any sign of it.

"I don't know, that's why you're finding it! I need to find the gems of Bahurspat."

"Bless-a you," Luigi murmured as he set about looking.

"What? No! Bahurspat is the king of Tzitzilow. Neighboring country."

Luigi looked over his shoulder as he asked, "You sure you didn't-a sneeze that-a time either?"

Daisy rolled her eyes, though Luigi couldn't see it. "Yes, I'm sure. Now get looking!" Her voice was slightly muffled as she was now on hands-and-knees, peering under tables and chairs for her goal.

They spent a few minutes looking until Daisy finally gave a victorious "aha!" Momentarily forgetting she was several feet deep into the underside of her bed, she tried to stand up and received a rather loud bonk to the head. Thankfully, her hairspray-drenched hairdo gave her a bit of a cushion from the steel bed-frame.

Luigi looked over his shoulder, still searching Daisy's shelves for her phonebook, and saw her holding a rather humble shoebox. Her face was aglow as she ushered Luigi forward. "Come see this, they're so beautiful!"

Luigi stepped forward and watched Daisy gingerly lift the lid off the shoebox. Sitting neatly and cradled in various socks were four beautiful gems. They glimmered in shades of red, yellow, blue, and black, shaped like an oval, a diamond, a circle, and a triangle respectively.

As Luigi motioned to touch them, Daisy slapped his hand away. "Don't touch them," she hissed at him, although he had figured that from her violent reaction. "They're fabulous, aren't they? They're utterly priceless, Barhuspat said. Only ones like them in all the worlds….took hundreds of years of shaping by the most careful of jewelers in the hottest of the Tzitzilow volcanoes."

"So why are they in-a shoebox? Why-a not display them like-a they should-a be?"

"Because the castle workers wouldn't like me to have them anywhere near the castle, let alone displayed for the whole word to see. They're 'dangerous'," Daisy told him in a mocking voice.

Luigi almost bent to touch them again, but remembered Daisy's slap and pulled his hand back. "Are they?"

Daisy gave a half-shrug. "I guess. I mean, if you touch all four together it tears a hole in the space-time continuum and grants the holder total control over everything with a face in the two connected worlds."

Luigi looked at Daisy as if she were mad. "And you're-a keeping them in-a the same _shoebox_?"

Daisy pointed at the box with her free hand and said, "duh, that's why I put the socks in it! Besides, if they're too far apart for too long then they send everything within a 50-mile radius to the parallel world."

Luigi shook his head in shock at the four, unremarkable little gems. "And why did-a the king give-a these to you anyway?"

"For services to the king. I beat his cranky old uncle at golf."

"So he gave-a you the most-a powerful gems in-a the world?"

Daisy rolled her eyes. "Luigi, I'm sure they're not _the_ most powerful gems in the world. Just…somewhere near the top. Besides, he probably gave it to me because he was afraid of how dangerous they are. And he probably figures if no one who actually plans on using them for total world domination knows I have them or where they are, might as well pass them off to me. And if I slip up, it's not his fault.

"Don't think you'd understand, Luigi. It's a diplomat thing. He says he trusts me to keep them safe; you're the first person I've even told about them. The maids don't clean under my bed since I hid that bouquet of piranha plants under there, so they're perfectly safe, just like I promised."

Luigi looked up at Daisy skeptically. "And what do you-a plan on doing with-a them?"

Daisy's eyes were glowing with excitement. "Ruin his trust." She grinned at Luigi's quickly paling face. "Did you find that phonebook yet?"

"Daisy, I don't-a think…."

Daisy ignored Luigi's plea of concern for the safety of humanity and took it to mean he hadn't. "Check in the drawer under the phone."

After sighing, Luigi drudged over to the drawer. He opened it and, lo and behold, in the most obvious place that he hadn't looked in, was the yellow phonebook. "I thought you-a said you didn't-a know where it was!"

Daisy shrugged, placing the gems on her bed. "I guess I remembered. Bring it over, hurry, hurry!"

Luigi followed her bidding, hoping and praying Daisy knew what she was doing. "Daisy, if you're-a going to risk-a the lives of everything-a, I don't-a think Mario's-a worth it."

She took the phonebook and leafed through it, skimming to the E's. "Oh please, not _everything_."

"'Everything that-a has a face'? That-a doesn't leave anything out. Anything. I think-a our old-a toaster had a face. It-a frowned when Mario burnt-a the toast."

She furrowed her brow, still fingering the pages. "Good point,"

"So you'll-a reconsider?"

Daisy laughed. "Luigi, something like me forgetting that the hills have eyes isn't going to back me down. Surely you know that by now?" Daisy gasped in pleasure as she found her target, her gloved finger dabbing a rather small ad in the _Unique Desires_ section.

Luigi squinted to read the small text. Obviously the company didn't have the funds to purchase an ad-size comparable to the two sandwiching ads, "Everyday Yaks" and "Ew-be-gone- Blubber Removal Service".

Even squinting, it was hard to read the text. Luigi almost seemed to think that, perhaps, the owners of this business only wanted those who knew what they were looking for to be able to read it. Someone who would look for this, not someone flipping through a phonebook looking for a way to blow some cash. Like they almost didn't _want_ as much business as possible.

Sure enough, the company Daisy was pointing to was none other than 'Evil-lains Inc.' "Daisy," Luigi started with a shaky voice, "I _really_-a hope you know what you're-a doing."

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Peach ran back down the halls she had scarcely just run up, clutching a tiny box and her dress at the same time. She skidded to a halt, waving her arms to stop her high-heels from sending her falling onto her rear. Peach took a deep breath as she entered the Private Great Hall.

Spreaded throughout the room were the koopalings, each interacting freely and happily. She noticed with a smile that it was easy to guess what each was doing, although they did seem a bit more anxious than usual.

Peach automatically rushed towards Kammy, wringing her wrinkled hands in the center of the spacious room. The magikoopa saw Peach approaching and gave a bit of a half-smile. Once the princess was in earshot, Kammy growled, "shouldn't you have been here ten minutes ago?"

Peach gestured to the box, quickly but neatly wrapped in a pink gift-wrap Peach always carried in her _Princess in Emergency_ kit. "I needed… to get this… from my room." Peach was obviously winded, but Kammy ignored the clear effort.

"You should have had it with you. All the koopalings did," Kammy waved a hand towards the marble table piled high with gifts from Bowser's closest friends and family. "In fact, _princess_, you're the last to arrive. Except for His Horribleness himself, of course...and Kamek."

Peach raised an eyebrow as she continued trying to gain air. "Is Kamek… supposed to be here… before Bowser… too?"

Kammy looked slightly flustered as she fiddled with some papers. "Well, _yes_, but Kamek is an incompetent old fart, so he's expected to be late. You, however, miss _perfectly prompt princess_, assured us you'd be on time."

Peach took a deep breath, trying to ignore Kammy's attitude best she could. But something about Kammy's undying hate and Peach's frustration at her lack of appreciation made the princess snap.

"Look, Kammy, I know I may be stepping on some toes over here, but I didn't _ask_ to be kidnapped again for vacation. Just because I'm enjoying myself and learning to appreciate you koopas as more than just mindless drones doesn't mean I'm going to start replacing you all. I'm not even supposed to _care_ about Bowser's birthday, so you should be _honored_ that I changed my mind about him enough to get a stupid gift, even if I am late. Isn't that what he always wanted? Isn't what he wants supposed to be what his people want too?

"Maybe it just bugs you that even if I was an hour late Bowser wouldn't care, but if you step just a toe out of line he'd kick you around the room. I didn't ask for _that_, either. So quit trying to make me feel like I'm hated here because we both know I'm not. I never did anything to hurt you, and sometimes things change. Maybe you should just accept that and move on.

"I'll probably never get you to like me, but I _can_ get you to realize that I'm not a stupid pink doormat. I have feelings and I have a temper, so stay _out of my way_ and I won't have to remind you that. If you don't get out of the dark ages and into a world of change, like the rest of us, you'll find yourself cold, old, lonely, and forgotten. What _I_ can do to _my_ enemies is a lot more than beat them to a pulp and incinerate them. But the power that princesses really have? Goes completely against code to use it. So don't you _dare_ try and tempt me to ruin your life. You can't ever do it to me, so just stop trying."

Peach took a deep breath, beginning to feel aware of the nine wide pairs of eyes, watching her shake as she yelled. She felt a strange rush as the owners of eight of those pairs began applauding…soon, the koopalings had given their Mama Peach a standing ovation. She couldn't understand their calls and cheers; it took all her energy to try and hear them over the blood pounding in her ears.

Kammy felt a foreign wetness welling up in her eyes as she thought about what had just happened. The fact that she had been beaten by Peach in her own element, again, was almost too much for her to bear. It was perhaps even more embarrassing to be beat out in harsh words than in magic, but the words said were what hurt her the most.

Peach really had no idea how much power she had over Kammy, how fast she really could make Kammy 'cold, old, lonely, and forgotten'. And even though she had threatened about it rather dramatically, Peach wouldn't stop Kammy from trying to prevent that from happening. Her life had been perfectly wonderful before Peach came to be comfortably in the picture…it shouldn't be _too_ hard to revert it back.

xxxx0o0o0o0o0o0o0xxxx

"…alright, thank you very much…of course…that's right, as soon as possible…no no, that will be just fine, perfect in fact. Alright, see you then!...mmhmm…bye." Daisy triumphantly hung up the phone and grinned at Luigi. His face hadn't gotten any of its color back since he saw the number they were calling.

Daisy sighed. "Would you like me to explain so you can stop worrying so much?"

"Yes-a, please!"

Daisy eagerly grabbed a notebook and sat cross-legged, quickly illustrating as she explained out loud. "Okay, here's us and here's Mario…and here's the four gems of Barhuspat. Mario's not going to know it, but we're going to give one of the gems to my friend who works at Evil-lains Inc, one to one of my good friends, and one to Bahurspat himself.

"Evil-lains is actually government-run, but none of its clients know that. We built it as a trap to give potential villains a "safe-haven" where we can keep close tabs on them and arrest them the moment they start being…well…evil. Anyway, the gem we have there will attract one of the clientele, and he'll want the other gems, obviously. So he'll go to Bahurspat and steal his gem just before we go there to have a visit.

"When we get there, it'll be all 'oh no what now' and Mario will want to get the other gem before the villain-guy does. Hopefully we'll get it before the villain-guy, but it shouldn't really matter. That's why I'm gonna keep one just in case. Then Mario will want to get the last two gems from the villain-guy, and the villain-guy will want the two we have, so we'll have this battle thing or whatever. Mario will win, the villain will go to jail, and the gems will go back in their shoebox."

Luigi looked at the notebook, stick-figures, circles, and arrows creating an almost intelligible mess. He frowned up at the beaming princess, unsure what to say. "Are you-a sure this is-a going to work?"

"Has Mario failed before?"

"Well…no…but we-a don't-a want to risk anything-a…"

"So you understand it? You love it?" Luigi grimaced down at the mess of pencil, but before he could reply, Daisy jumped up and grabbed his hand. "Good! Because we're pitching it to Evil-lains in three minutes."

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It had taken Kamek a shockingly short amount of time to get the room in order once he and Bowser arrived. Bowser's entry had caused a flurry of excitement from the koopalings, along with four different play-by-plays of Kammy and Peach's rather one-sided argument.

Now, after Kamek had employed his well-practice art of blending magic and discipline, the group of eleven sat in a large circle. Everyone had their own chair, Bowser's profile carved into the backs of each of them, faux-claws perched on the ends of the arms. The koopalings were restless, but no one looked quite as excited as Bowser.

Peach could tell this was his favorite part of his birthday. Not only was Bowser receiving gifts and tokens of admiration and adoration, but he was surrounded by the people he loved best. Of course, Peach doubted Bowser would_ admit_ that was why this was his favorite part, but…she could tell. As he snapped angrily at a very restless Bowser Junior, she didn't miss his eyes glimmering and his tail twitching, just as restlessly as his son's.

Bowser unnecessarily cleared his throat, an almost evil grin spreading his face as he anxiously rubbed his hands together. "Alright, Kamek, you old geezer. You're first up."

"Dey pass out dah gifts in old-te-youngest…in case ya wanted te' know," Roy murmured to Peach. It was the first time for what seemed like weeks that Peach wasn't sitting next to Bowser- strangely enough, the circular seating was arranged in alphabetical order.

With a gracious nod, Kamek stood up and levitated his small gift-bag to the area. He nodded to Bowser, but didn't put it in his outstretched claw. Instead, Kamek placed the bag on the floor, stepping backwards from it as he threw primary-color shapes at it.

Suddenly, the bag grew into monstrous proportions. Whether Kamek had shrunk it to show off or for easier carrying, Peach wasn't sure. She also wasn't sure how on _earth_ Bowser was supposed to open it.

The Koopa King, however, was clearly unfazed. He stood up and, with a single sweeping motion, tore the front right off the bag. Bowser grinned as the tissue paper fell down, exposing a gift that was a quarter of its bag's size. "Bluffing. Figures."

Kamek's eyes twinkled as he caught Bowser's small joke. Kamek stepped over towards him and pointed his staff at the gift, now open to the rest of the room. Standing in the midst of the dark-green tissue paper was an extremely handsome black shell, the finest of its kind and glittering with its many sharp, yet gentle stone cuts. It was lined with the smoothest pearl-colored lining, stunning and brilliant silver spikes studding it along the back. "It's a formal shell, your majesty."

Bowser's grin was spreading wider than he would have liked. "It's cool." He lifted it up, examining the soft inner-lining, touching the cold and pure stone back. His eyes flashed greedily as he noticed a very slight green tint to the black. "Did you get it for the ball thing?"

"I certainly had that in mind, sire. You like it?"

He obviously did. "Yeah, yeah sure." He smiled at the shell, adding, "This'll make me even sexier than I already am; that's pretty hard to do, I'm pretty dang sexy." He spread his sharp-toothed grin, soaking in the comments from the crowd. After a nod, he said, "Kammy, your turn. Better be good enough for me."

In a flurry of purple, Kammy stood up and summoned her gift. Hers was just as large as Kamek's, but instead was in a box. "Happy Birthday, your wretchedness!" Kammy gave a strained smile, obviously still upset. She quickly sat down, not bothering to stand next to Bowser as he opened the gift.

Inside the large box was a massive stone chair, a deep grey color with red padding along the seat, back, and even the front of the legs. The chair was covered in engravings of Bowser in various positions, a rather impressive likeness of him on the back of the chair. The arms, legs, and top of the chair all curled into claws, spiked wrist-bands surrounding them as well. The chair was probably wider than it was tall, but it was extremely impressive, and almost more frightening than Bowser himself.

Just as he had for Kamek's gift, Bowser grinned. He ran his claw along the seat cushion, pleasantly noticing that the padding went far beyond the chair's limit. He grinned at Kammy, telling her, "I always need more thrones. More ways for people to know I'm amazing! It's like furniture that _is_ me."

Kammy beamed at Bowser. Not seeing Kammy's radiant reaction, Peach teased out-loud, "right, because _none_ of the furniture in this palace have any sign at _all_ that you're in charge." She smiled at Bowser and he grinned back, proudly. Kammy, however, either missed the light-hearted sarcasm or was upset Peach was taking away her moment of praise from Bowser.

She turned to face the princess, glaring hard. "He said he liked it, okay? Butt out."

Peach's smile faded. She opened her mouth to respond, but, not being able to think of anything she could say that wouldn't start another fight, resignedly closed it again.

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Presents continued in a similar matter for over an hour, Bowser thrilled with his very generous haul. Peach was skipped as Bower went directly from Kammy to Ludwig, accepting his pure chain-chomp-skin baton hesitantly. He was faster to take it when Ludwig explained that the baton could control hundreds of musicians with a single wave. He had told his father that the musicians were literally bound to the movements of the baton, and the one holding it controlled every single thing they did.

Lemmy got his father a live mutated rabbit, the family preferring not to ask where he could have possibly found one. Lemmy's gift spent the rest of the gift session foaming at the mouth, tearing at the feet of Kammy's chair, although it magically repelled any harm done to it. Bowser, although a bit repulsed by its lavender fur and bird-like front feet, was amused none-the-less.

Lemmy's gift distracted Roy so much he almost missed his turn, but he was quick to show off his certificate of ownership gift, having single-handedly gotten control of a small province of weedles for his father. However impressive his gift was, his attempt to convince Bowser to take Peach there as a romantic trip failed miserably. The other koopalings found the idea of an island of weedles being romantic incredibly amusing and did nothing but mock the idea.

Iggy's gift was rather impressive as well, being personally designed, built, and installed by the quiet genius. Iggy had created a machine that lined pools of lava, slowly chipping away the rock that formed along the edge and casting it to the center of the pool. According to Iggy, this would exponentially decrease the lava's specific heat, which would in turn cost the empire millions less every year, if it was installed all over the country. Bowser pretty much only smiled and nodded, expecting someone else to explain later.

Wendy was more excited about her gift than Peach had seen her about _anything_ all week. By far it was the smallest gift yet, a tiny bottle of cologne that Bowser could hold in one hand. Wendy assured her father that it was especially made for him and him alone, apparently blending with his natural musk to create 'the most alluring scent there, like, could ever be'. Even with her hyperbolic nature, Wendy was never this thrilled. Bowser seemed curious, but tried to look as far from it as he could. Wanting to smell good was _not_ a very evil trait.

Morton's gift was a rather crudely-carved bedside table, made to look like a koopa struggling in pain to hold up whatever was set on the table. It was actually hard to tell it was a koopa at all, let alone "a stupid weakling stupid-head koopa, pretty much dying holding up whatever crap he's holding up since he's such a stupid weakling koopa- the kind you crush all the time since they're stupid and weak". But the hand-carved aspect was shockingly sweet to Peach, especially the tiny engraving at the bottom that read "Happy brithday King Dad".

Larry had taken extra time and expense to find the perfect gift for his father, and was obviously not satisfied as he brought it out. But the boxing-practice set of punching bags, weights, and all other sorts of training equipment seemed to more than please Bowser. He seemed very anxious to try it all out, to 'practice up for next time I have to punch some idiot to a pulp', and especially anxious to beat the stuffing out of a rather life-like Mario dummy. His boyish excitement made Peach giggle, and she even recognized the Mario dummy as not a threat, but a source of humor.

Bowser Junior had run up to give his gift, an extremely detailed miniature version of Bowser himself. The miniature Bowser was electronic, with a remote that controlled his walking, roaring, running, and even bursts of flame. As Bowser used it to light a preoccupied Iggy on fire, he roared with laughter. Bowser's familiar evil chortle made shivers run over Peach's spine, but not in the paralyzing fear she once associated with the laugh- no, this was a different feeling completely.

Bowser seemed ready to issue them all away, and Peach realized he didn't think she had a gift at all. Peach quickly stood up, feeling his eyes turn to her. "Bower, wait." She needn't have said anything, however, because the koopa king had shut up the moment she had suddenly stood. She smiled and said, "I have a gift for you, too!"

Flustered, Bowser mumbled, "I thought my gift was you being here and coming to the ball with me…"

Peach shook her head and began her walk to get her own humble package among the extended family gifts Bowser wasn't going to open just yet. "I told you that wasn't good enough."

"Is it a kiss?" Bowser asked, a little too eagerly.

Peach was glad her back was turned to the audience-like family now- her face was positively burning. "No," she mumbled, "It's in a _box_."

Bowser was a bit put-out, but the idea of getting a gift from his wonderful, perfect princess was still overwhelming. His birthday was _so dang good_ this year! It seemed to take Peach longer than any human could ever walk to get back over to him; his greedy outstretched claw was looking rather stupid with her so far away.

She placed the tiny pink box in Bowser's claw, her gloved fingers lingering on his before she pulled away to watch his expression.

Bowser lifted the box to his eyes, glaring at the tiny ribbon. The box was, by far, the smallest gift he had opened all day, and even more, the only one wrapped with tiny human fingers. He didn't dare maul the gift open…who knew what was inside, and it killed him to just imagine him destroying Peach's gift. "Is it supposed to be a puzzle or something to open the stupid thing?" he murmured, picking at the ribbon with his huge claws.

Finally, the pink tissue fell away and Bowser could lift the tiny white lid. Inside the box, glimmering and shining like the Mushroom Kingdom sky, was a perfect sapphire that rested on one of Peach's perfect dresses.

Bowser couldn't believe what was before his eyes. He tore his eyes from the stone to Peach's own eyes, matching the color perfectly. "You like it?" she whispered, knowing the answer already.

"I love it." Bowser grinned, not missing the obvious opportunity before him. "I love _you_."

Peach closed her eyes and smiled in silent laughter. "I know," she told him with a smirk, "You've told me." Bowser smiled back, turning his eyes back to the gem. Around the sapphire was a gentle golden outline, tiny etchings of flowers and vines seemingly describing his princess in only lines. "Look at the back," Peach ordered quietly.

Obediently, Bowser delicately flipped the sapphire over. His heart caught as he first noticed tiny swatches of pink silk where Peach couldn't separate the sapphire completely. Just like he thought, she had tore it from her very own dress for _him_. Then, what she had wanted him to see caught his eye.

Engraved in what was clearly Peach's handwriting, though scratchy and forced, read "To Bowser, on his Birthday, From Peach". Peach smiled as she told Bowser, "I ruined my best sewing needle for that."

Bowser looked up at Peach, grinning. "Thanks." He swallowed the lump in his throat, awkwardly aware of the aura of love that probably only extended so far in the room. More for the benefit of his family and his reputation, he added, "even though it's obvious I was worth it."

The onlookers laughed lightly with Peach and Bowser, but Bowser had already turned his eyes back to the simple sapphire. It meant so much to him, so little to the other people in the room.

It seemed like, at least for today, the only thing that could keep his eyes off his little stone Peach was the eyes he loved of the same color…the eyes he could look into without fearing anything all he wanted tonight. _Tonight._

_

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**Author's Note: **So did you like it? Did you guess Peach's gift? I know a few of you did...:P But I wasn't gonna change it to _candy_ because it was guessable. (hahaha. Free cookies for anyone who gets that reference...and if you don't, go read up your BxP fanfics!)

Speaking of that, I just wanted to remind you guys how much I love y'all. My fans (still impossibly weird calling you guys that) are such an awesome group of people...I think you guys are the most attractive and wonderful folks in the whole internet with the biggest hearts ever. You guys make me keep writing, y'know that?

Next chapter is really only about three-quarters done and it's really only -okay-. But still fun. Most of it's based around the various side-stories, but that's just because I want to start the dance on chapter 23 so I need to fill space. Hah. I'm lame. Sorry. :P

(ew long a/n. Sorry about that. Hope it didn't put you off to much and that you'll still review...I love reviews. C:)

-Razzi


	22. Almost

**Foreword: **This should be a fun, almost a filler (but not quite) chapter. Like I said earlier, mostly focuses on side-stories, Bowser and Peach aren't together once through it, but there's still fluff. I'm getting to the part of the story where the real changes happen, so it's exciting. :) For me, at least.

Hope you all had lovely Holidays thus far, and happy reading! I still don't own any main characters.

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This was getting too much for Toadsworth to stand. No matter what everyone around him said, he couldn't shake the feeling that Peach was in the hands of something evil, that something was happening to her, something that would make him regret ever letting her go. He tried to sip his tea quietly and calmly, but the tinkling of the china was painfully loud as he jiggled his leg.

Toadette looked over at her mentor and shook her head. Old people could be so difficult. "Toadsworth," she said, not caring that she was interrupting the impatient toad at the front of the room. "How much is it going to take to convince you that Peach is _perfectly fine_?"

Toadsworth's laugh was clearly strained. "What are you talking about, poppet? We're not even discussing the dear princess…why even bring her up, eh?"

"Do you even know what we _are _discussing?"

The toad in charge of the meeting scowled at Toadette under his blue cap. "You mean what we _were_ discussing until _someone_ decided it was alrighty to interrupt?"

Toadsworth nodded apologetically towards the toad instructor before answering Toadette. "Of course I know what we're discussing, m'dear. The topic at hand is none other than…" He glanced quick as he could to the board behind the toad, now tapping his foot. "Flooding." Toadsworth beamed, sure he escaped possible humiliation.

If that was so, Toadette sure had a strange sense of humor. She laughed even harder at the incredulous expression of the instructor. "See, Shor T.? I'm not the only one who doesn't pay attention."

Shor T. glared at Toadsworth, hissing, "we finished discussing the flooding in Lardy Land fifteen minutes ago. We're talking about the Darklands relation team right now."

Toadsworth had been given just enough distraction to keep his mind off the missing princess. For now. "What about them, sah?"

"Well, we don't _have_ one. And also, if the international calendar's correct, it's King Bowser's birthday today. It's not going to put us as the most powerful country in the world in very good light for not even addressing his _birthday_."

Toadsworth furrowed his brow. "We're not allied with the Darklands for a reason, Shor T. And we're _not_ going to send a gift to Bowser for the same reason- he's our bloomin' enemy! Princess Peach has never, and will never, like him."

Shor T. shook a pointer at Toadsworth with a glare in his eye. "If you don't recall, Bowser hasn't kidnapped her in quite a while. He's always second to some other villain…I'd say it's only a matter of time before Peach sees him as an equal ruler and not a threat."

Toadsworth looked rather red in the face by this point. "Well, you see," he huffed, "That's what separates you from my bally-good job. Blinkin' foolish ideas like that…Bowser is Bowser, Peach is Peach, and there's nothing more to it, sah! So until she prances home and says 'erself that Bowsah's a changed koopa, he's our _enemy_. And the Mushroom Kingdom 'as no problem letting the bloomin' world know."

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"Remind-a me why we're-a going to see this Bahurspat-a guy?" Mario grumbled from the back seat of Daisy's yellow jeep. Daisy smiled in the rearview mirror at Mario. Her hair was bouncing in the wind and her glasses were bright with the sun, but Mario seemed unchanged as he had the whole day. His _hat_ wasn't even fazed by the wind or sun…Luigi's seemed determined to reveal his hat-hair any moment.

"Mario, don't worry about it. I just set up a visit with him a_ long_ time ago and when you boys showed up at my doorstep, I just _had_ to take you along!"

Mario fiddled with his mustache. "We could have-a stayed at the-a castle."

"You guys need fresh air. Besides, this'll be fun! Seeing the sights! Exploring the world! An _adventure_." She eagerly looked into her rearview mirror, searching for a flash of excitement in Mario's eyes. She saw none. Luigi, however, tensed up significantly. Luckily for her mood, they had already reached the castle of Tzitzilow. "Aaaand…here we are!"

The yellow jeep was hardly in park when an extremely large and round goomba came waddling out of the castle, huffing and puffing with a tired look on his face. "Princess…princess Daisy…thank…thank the stars…you're here…" King Bahurspat didn't have to pretend to be winded- the run from his dormitories to her car, mixed with memorizing his lines, something he was infamously bad at, was enough to make him die of exhaustion.

Daisy frowned as she stepped out of the car, watching Mario out of the corner of her eye. "My goodness, what happened here, Bahurspat? Your door looks forced, and you look like a wreck!"

Bahurspat went pale for a moment before a flash of a grin crossed his face. He quickly replaced it with an overly distressed expression, shouting, "We were robbed, Princess Daisy! A horrible man came…and…and…"

"What did he steal?" Daisy prompted through her teeth.

"The…the gems! There are four…scattered…uh…around. You have one…right?"

Daisy reached into her purse and conveniently pulled out the blue circle. "I sure do. He stole one? How terrible! Maybe you want to tell Mario what they are?"

Bahurspat frowned at Daisy before turning to Mario. "You're Mario, right…the red M…right?" Mario nodded and all of a sudden, Bahurspat seemed quite happy to be in such a perilous situation.

"The…gems?" Daisy asked impatiently.

"Oh! Of course! The gems! There are four…and…they're scattered. If they get together…bad stuff can happen. So…you don't want a bad man…like the one who stole them, he's a bad man…you don't want him to have them…bad stuff would happen…so…yeah…don't let him have them." Bahurspat was then very upset he had no hands to wipe his sweaty face with.

Daisy tapped Luigi's foot with hers, cuing him in. "Mumma mia, Mario! This-a sounds like an _adventure_-a…we'd-a better hurry!"

Mario nodded, asking, "Which way did-a the burglar a-go?"

Bahurspat grinned again. Clearly, this line he hadn't forgotten. "He went that way, towards the second gem. I think Madame Clearmont has it; you'd better hurry!"

Mario nodded, ignoring Bahurspat's poor acting and ushering his friends to Daisy's jeep. "Do you-a know how to-a get there, Daisy?"

"Yeah…you sure you wanna do this, Mario? It's a pretty risky adventure…"

Mario looked hurt. "Daisy, we-a must. We can't-a let the bad guys-a win!"

"Alright then…to Madame Clearmont!" Daisy put the jeep in gear and as it sputtered to life, Bahurspat ran over Daisy's still-open door. "Did I…did I do well, Highness?"

Daisy looked into Bahurspat's eager face and grinned, hiding the truth behind her sparkling teeth. "Good enough, Bahurspat! Thanks for the help, but we have to go and you're supposed to be in distress." The goomba king nodded and began obnoxiously sniffing and fretting around in a circle.

As the trio of faux-adventurers drove off, Daisy couldn't help thanking the stars that Madame Clearmont had been an actress her entire life.

xxxx0o0o0o0o0o0o0xxxx

"You'll need instruction before the ball. I know you've been to more than you can probably count, but none of them are quite as amazing as this one will be. I'd do the teaching myself, but I've got other crap to do." Bowser grimaced, more at leaving Peach than thinking of his birthday responsibilities.

Peach smiled up at Bowser's expression, reading it easily. "I'm pretty excited, I've never been to a Darklandian ball. Are they anything like normal koopa balls?"

"There's _nothing_ like a Darklandian ball. Especially if I'm hosting it. They're the best things in the world…only the most important people ever are invited. So that's you, me, the Darklandian governors, and a bunch of yuppies. But you're there, so it won't be boring at all."

Peach was going to respond when she heard an impatient woman clearing her throat behind them. Half expecting to see Kammy when she turned around, she was very surprised to see…a hammer bro.

Bowser glared at the hammer bro, upset more at her presence than her interruption. "This is the chick that's supposed to teach you what stuff to do at the ball."

The female hammer bro gave a very forced smile and tipped her head towards the royalty. Where hammer bros usually wore their helmet, she had a short haircut of blonde hair, but the rest of her appearance was quite normal. Except that she carried a clipboard instead of a hammer. "Shall we go to your room then, Princess Peach?"

"I guess so," she spun around to say goodbye to Bowser. "So when are you going to pick me up, sir?" She grinned at Bowser and he grinned back, ready to answer in the same light tone. The hammer bro…or would she be a sis?...interrupted with a cold "_I'll _explain that. Say your goodbyes and let's go."

She didn't even really let Bowser and Peach say anything more than "well, bye" before pulling Peach down the halls to her room. Some how, this lady's march made Peach even more frantic to keep up than when she had _ran_ the same path.

Once they had reached Peach's guest room, the hammer bro began talking extremely fast. She pulled a miniature model of the huge, three-floor ballroom seemingly out of thin air and put it on Peach's bed. She was pointing things out and explaining koopa courtesy faster than Peach could keep up with.

"Wait, wait, stop!" Peach's interruption clearly perturbed her helper, but she allowed Peach to continue. "Can you slow down? I can't keep up…"

"We don't have much time to spare, highness. The ball is in a few short hours and you're not ready at all." She looked Peach up and down and grimaced.

Ignoring this koopa's insults and barbed speech was a lot easier than ignoring Kammy's similar remarks, probably because the koopa reminded her so much of her interior designer back at the castle. She simply smiled and replied, "I should be able to understand what's going on, don't worry. I practically grew up in a ball room…but I have a question," she waited for the koopa to ask for her to continue but only received a scowl. "What's your name?"

She cringed at Peach's clearly impertinent question. "I don't see what that has to do with your instruction. But it's Kara, since you asked."

"And…can I ask another question?"

"You just did," Kara sneered, "but fine."

"…are you still called a hammer bro…even though you're a she?"

Kara's eyes were full of daggers. "I'm…not even answering that. Your insolence aside, let's look at the itinerary". She tore the top sheet off her clip board and thrust it at Peach, keeping one for herself. "At 5:23 sharp King Bowser will arrive at your door to escort you to the ballroom. You will both enter at 5:30 with a musical procession, then walk up the first flight of stairs to the dining balconies." She pointed out their path on the model as Peach followed along, noticing that she was thankfully skipping over details like '5:31:17- Peach waves at Orchestra' and '5:33:04- Bowser pulls out Peach's chair'.

"Next you will sit in your seats…Bowser at the head of the table on the right balcony, you on his left, and you will be served the meal. It comes in three courses for the dinner, all of which will be eaten respectfully and properly, the way King Bowser's great grandfather would have liked it." Kara smiled and was quiet for the first time since she started talking. Clearly, Bowser's great grandfather was her favorite king.

"After the dinner is cleared at 6:05, Bowser will lead you in the first dance of the evening. I suppose you know the waltz? You will be dancing to His Grace Ludwig's song he composed for the occasion. After the first movement the crowd will be allowed to join you. Ludwig's song is a concerto, so after the three movements there will be koopachord solo piece, followed by dessert at 6:45 sharp.

"Dessert marks the beginning of Bowser's… 'style'…of birthday party." Kara grimaced in disgust before painting her false smile back on and starting up again. "You will eat his dessert of choice in his manner of choice, followed by a break of music and a break-dancing competition at 7:30."

"Break-dancing?" Peach interrupted, amused.

Kara slowly blinked. "Yes. Break-dancing. You will not be competing in your dress or I will personally murder you in your sleep. After Bowser…the winner, as always… is crowned at the end of the competition, the garcons will set up the dining tables for the buffet food items to be eaten at one's leisure. At this point the ball is less…structured…and you have more lee-way to do what you and His Majesty would like to do.

"At 9:15 Ludwig's orchestra begins playing _proper_ music again and you and Bowser will lead the room in the First Last Dance. After the dance the B Guests will be asked to leave and the C Guests will take their place. The A Guests; yourself, King Bowser, the other dignitaries, and the highest paying of guests; will remain. Ludwig's orchestra will play straight until 10 o'clock, at which point the music will contain both Bowser's…preferred style of dancing…and orchestrated music.

"At 11 o'clock the buffet food will be replaced with buffet desserts and the doors will open to allow guests to leave. The last song will be played after everyone has left but King Bowser and yourself, even if we need to forcibly remove some of them. Of course the staff will still be present, but it is customary that the guest of honor stay the full length of his party."

Kara looked at her itinerary. "There are a million finer details I would like to go over with you but…you really need to get ready. You have a lot of work to do. I'll place my notes on your bed for you to review while you prepare." She stood up to leave and gathered up the model.

She sighed before leaving, looking at Peach's face hard and long. "Don't make yourself look like an idiot. Or His Majesty. He's not the classiest of kings, but…he still deserves tonight to be as good as he wants it to be." She shook Peach's hand and left, leaving her feeling tired just from listening.

xxxx0o0o0o0o0o0o0xxxx

Roy rapped on Ludwig's orchestra hall door. Even through the heavy walls, the orchestra's music was extremely overpowering. He kept trying to knock but finally realized that if it was impossible for him to hear his own knock, no one on the other side of the door would ever hear him.

He slammed the door open, furious that he was _still_ unnoticed. He marched towards Ludwig, dramatically conducting as his blue hair danced on top of his head. The musicians looked straight through Roy towards their conductor's hands, following with eager haste the movements and commands he gave them.

Roy was just a foot away from Ludwig, but he was still ignored. Roy saw Ludwig's eyes glazed over in the manner he had tried to describe as "seeing the music". For a fleeting moment, Roy felt guilty for interrupting an obviously fantastic rehearsal. The feeling went away as he remembered that it was just noise…no lyrics or anything…and Ludwig was being a cruddy partner. He raised his claw and dramatically knocked Ludwig's pile of music sheets to the ground.

Ludwig squeaked, finally broken out of his trance as it snowed music. He began to flail trying to get music, some of his orchestra ceasing, some watching curiously while playing away, others too absorbed in their music. Ludwig growled, ignoring his brother as he stood up and dramatically cut his orchestra off.

"I pray you Excuse me while I inquire of what this _imbecile_ was thinking when he had the bravado to complete such a noisome act of effrontery."

Roy grinned, glad to have the attention back at him. He stared hard at Ludwig's searing hot face, and kept his grin intact. "Ya know, bro, you've been a real tail lately. Not da best partner, f'you know what I mean."

Ludwig raised his eyebrows. "_I've_ been the tail? Dear brother, have you _glimpsed_ the state of my music? A complete wreck! _You_ are the one who needs to propitiate yourself towards _me_. Your behavior is simply egregious. What on earth would propel you to be such a… jerk?"

Roy put his hands over his heart and tilted his head. "Ah, Loody! Ju used a word I _understand _tah insult me. I'm touched. But seriously. Ya need to bump it up wif da whole match-making ting."

Ludwig's shoulders fell. "_That's_ what this jejune act was about? Eugh, Roy. I don't have _time _for such trivial affairs. If you haven't noticed, I have an orchestra to lead. But, thanks to your cordial acts of brotherly love, I apparently won't be continuing that for awhile." He waved a claw towards his orchestra as he continued, speaking both to them and Roy. "You all are dismissed from practice until we meet for the dinner at 4 hours, 30 minutes of the clock this evening. Remember your dress wear and to congregate just outside the orchestra door. Be punctual."

Roy watched Ludwig work on the floor of the orchestra room. "So…watcha gonna do to make our deal good?"

"I'm not going to do _anything_, Roy! I'm incredibly preoccupied with this musical performance. Maybe _after_ all this business has met its end. Then, perhaps, when the rest of the collaborative efforts have given up, we can show them a complete bouleversement. Does that sound appeasing enough for your ears?"

"Er…if boulevard whatevah is a good ting…then shoi. I kin go for a waiting."

"Good. Now, I believe you know the way to the door."

Roy leaned onto Ludwig's music stand, looking at his claws. "I dunno, doffing your music was pritty dang fun. I tink I should get going on yo other stocks too…"

Ludwig balled his claw into his pianist fist and brought it down like a thwomp onto Roy's footclaw. He watched him with just the smallest hint of a smile as he hopped out of the room on his good foot, howling and holding his foot. Ludwig called after him, "Rejoice that I have the patience to suppress my flame, dear brother. You have no hair to keep your head from burning as I."

Roy threw his claw into the air in indifference, but the nonchalance façade was ruined. He was still hopping away, hooting in pain.

xxxx0o0o0o0o0o0o0xxxx

Peach looked over the itinerary again. She was beginning to feel worried…this ball was a big deal, and she most certainly hadn't packed for anything like it. Her most formal dresses were at her home, as her vacation had been meant to be relaxing.

As if eager to answer her unspoken wish, a fist knocked on the door. Peach rushed to open it and found a young, female koopa troopa. The koopa troopa grinned and thrust out her hand to meet Peach's. "An honor to finally meet you, milady! An honor! To think, after all these years of only hearing of your beauty and brilliance, I get to see it first hand! What a surreal honor."

Peach watched, a little dazed, as the koopa troopa danced into the room, blathering on about how happy she was to meet Peach. "Uh," Peach began, "I'm sorry, but I don't even know who you are."

The koopa spun around, her wide eyes growing wider. "Well, of course you don't! Why would someone as magnificently regal as you spend time learning the names of trivial koopa handmaidens like myself? I would be even more shocked if you knew my name than I am already, for being in your room, in your very presence! Why, His Majesty tells us so much about you, and I was always honored to be in both His and Your service, but to really meet you, for the first time (and I do hope not the last time), it is just a-"

"I'm really sorry," Peach interrupted again, but the koopa didn't seem to mind. She snapped shut and stared, wide-eyed and enthralled. Though a bit thrown off guard, Peach continued, "bu...but I'm terribly busy with preparations for the ball. Would you mind telling me what you're doing here?"

The koopa grinned. "The ball! That's exactly what I'm here for! I've been working for years on creating beautiful ballgowns for all those souls who employ my service, as well as countless dresses for Princess Wendy (though she rarely uses them) and in my spare time I've made one for you, milady! His Stupendousness always told us, his humble servants, of your beauty, grace, and superiority. But to see it first hand is really something extraordinary! I never believed I-"

Even in the short time they had known each other, Peach had realized this chatty koopa wouldn't stay on track if you paid her. Interrupting, this time without excusing herself, Peach said, "So you have a dress? For the ball tonight? For me?"

The koopa's face lit up enough to blow a fuse. "Oh, you bet I do! I've spent all my time on this dress, and I only dreamed of a chance to show it to you. This ball came along and I figured 'perhaps milady Peach has nothing to wear! Perhaps I can meet her and give her a token of my admiration, even if such token is only an ounce of the honor I will have for meeting her and representing the whole of King Bowser's servants'! And here you are! And here I am! And you're asking about my dress, and I have it here, and oh, it's all so dreamlike. Such an opportunity, none of the other girls will believe it, that my silly little hobby paid off in such a life-changing way; for it truly does change one's life to meet their idol and the most high Princess Pe-"

"Can I see the dress?" Even if it was hideous, Peach owed it to the koopa to see what she made. And if it was any better than what she was wearing right then, it would be far worth it.

The koopa sprang out of the room, shockingly without a word, and came springing back with a sheathed dress-hanger, flying behind her like a banner. She slowly pulled the sheath off the dress, picking and prodding at the pink masterpiece with silent adoration.

Peach stared at the dress in awe. It was everything she could have dreamed of, made right here in Bowser's palace, without her even knowing! "You made this?"

The koopa grinned. "I did! I designed the entire thing, too. I based it off of your favorite dress style, obviously, giving it an extra petticoat, exposed with elegant ribbons, as well as a shrug in place of your classic sleeves to make it more elegant. See how the shrug is held in place with a sapphire, just like your own? That was my idea…"

The koopa designer seemed to be ready to ramble on about her train of thought in designing the dress, so Peach ignored her as she explored it herself. The dress was just as the designer had explained- just like her own dress, but far more elegant. Many of the additional layers of fabric seemed to be shining- indeed, they had silver and gold sewn right into them. Even her silk gloves were a new kind of pale pink, with shimmering thread and diamond accents. The dress seemed to shine, but wasn't obtrusive either. It was simply gorgeous, and Peach couldn't have imagined it to be any better suited to what she wanted for Bowser's ball.

"Can I try it on?" Peach's mind was flooding with happiness for answered prayers, and interpreted the koopa's squeal of delight and blathering so high-pitched it was unintelligible as a yes. She and the dress disappeared into the closet

Minutes later, Peach was done putting on the dress. She gave the gloves one final tug and looked at herself in the mirror. Perfect. But what was most surprising about the dress was its shocking comfort. She had imagined, what with all the precious metal sewn into the fabric, it would itch like none other. And yet, it seemed that not only was the dress itself made of lightweight fabric, but so was an almost intangible inner-layer. This dressmaker was a genius. No other word for it.

She spun around, feeling more like a princess than she had in months, even without her crown. There were no more worries about her appearance at the ball; she truly felt worthy to be His Majesty's date to his birthday ball. Peach held her shimmering stomach lightly and twisted from side-to-side, imagining dancing in the room modeled by Kara.

Peach giggled, realizing she was just like a teenager, going on her first date with a crush. _What a silly thing to compare myself to!_ And yet, as she looked up at the clock and saw there were only two hours and forty-two minutes until he showed up to escort her away, she felt her stomach flip over. _This can't possibly be like going on a first date. I was nowhere near this excited with my first date- ever! I must simply be excited to see…the ball. It'll be fantastic!_

Grinning at her own expression, Peach was far too ecstatic to worry about where her heart was taking her, and pranced out into her room to meet the chattery koopa designer. Hopefully she was as much a cosmetic and hair fairy godmother as she was with fabrics.

xxxx0o0o0o0o0o0o0xxxx

Bowser stared out a stained-glass window, imagining spending his famous Birthday Ball with Peach…his precious princess…he didn't even think about the papers he was signing. But it didn't matter- he trusted Kamek and his team of Empirical Contract Overseers, and almost all of these notes were just impersonal Thank You's for his many gifts.

Another koopa in the corner was reading off an extensive list of the gifts received up till that moment, but to Bowser his voice sounded too distant to even bother listening to. The much louder memories and daydreams of Peach were much more pleasant anyway.

He pushed a paper aside and searched for the line for his signature. It was just where it was on every other sheet; squished between the Thank You letter and the list of Bowser's titles, almost as long. _"Fine, Bowser. I'll call you 'your-ultimate-mightiness-lord-of-all-who-is-in-no-way-silly'. How about that? Regal enough?"_ he remembered. Bowser grinned, just like he had that bright day of Pickleball. _"Yeah, sounds good."_

Bowser remembered the promise Peach made to finish their lesson later…he chuckled. _I'll have to make sure she doesn't forget. That court we're building for her should be good incentive for a return…besides the chance to be with me, of course. Maybe I should surprise her with it on Friday…but maybe-_

"Um, sire?"

Rudely awoken from his day dreams, Bowser turned his head to snarl at his interrupter. "What is it, freak?"

"You're…you're signing your name as 'Queen Peach Koopa', your wickedness."

Bowser looked down at the papers and chuckled under his breath. He knocked the pile, both of finished correctly, incorrectly, and unfinished notes off the table. "Who cares, anyway? This crap is stupid. I don't even know what in Darklands I'm thanking those idiots for."

The koopa in the corner reading off the list of gifts began to mutter under his breath. Bowser's piercing glare caught him first. He turned to the dark magikoopa standing afar off. "You!"

"Me, sir?" The magikoopa was fairly high up in the ranks- high enough to be allowed to choose her own strange wardrobe.

"Yes, you. If Freak-face over here decides it's worth the time, copy them signatures onto those other sheets of paper. My palace is crawling with magic freaks and I have a ball to go to with Peach. There's no reason I should be doing stupid carpal-tunnel work on my birthday. It's just stupid."

The koopa nearby quavered, "But sire…hand-signing notes of gratitude is a tradition…"

Bowser stared down the quaking koopa. "And when it started, were there however many freaking hundred things to sign? On one of the busiest days of the year? When the king in question had the most important guest there is to entertain?"

"Well…probably not, your excellence…"

"Then shut up, Freak-face. And you, magicker who needs a make-over, get working." The koopas in the room looked at one another. As Bowser began storming out of the room, the squeaky koopa stopped him. "Sire, sire, may I ask where you're going? In…in case someone asks?"

Bowser spun around. "It's my palace. I'm allowed to go wherever the bottomless pits I want." He started storming off again, trying to refocus his attention on his pleasant princess. As his thoughts softened, he instantly felt guilty for leaving the koopas so confused. He stopped and sighed, shouting, "but I'll be in my room. Getting ready for the ball thing. Or something like that," before leaving again.

As he left, he could just hear the lady magikoopa ask, "So…I'm copying _these_ signiatures?"

"No, Kamella. Don't copy the ones that say Queen. Copy the…"

Bowser closed his eyes, but as he shook his head in disdain, his lips formed a smile. He batted a balloon of his face that was about three-times larger out of the way and kept going. On his way to his room, he passed an open doorway, construction noise rattling the hallway. Bowser peeked his head in and looked over an elegant courtyard-style room, the outer wall knocked out and the dimmed sunlight pouring over the fake grass and stone seats workers were meticulously installing.

Bowser grinned as he looked at the progress of the spontaneous progress. A stately looking Monty Mole waved at the king and lumbered over. "Happy Birthday to you, sir."

Bowser grunted in reply. His eyebrows scrunched together as he stared at a rather large green shape painted onto the field. "What is _that_ supposed to be? If you want green grass, water it; don't paint some freaky cucumber thing across it."

"Er, it's a pickle, Bowser. Y'know, for-"

"Make it a mushroom," Bowser grunted. "No stupid pickles. I want a mushroom."

The Monty mole raised his heavy eyebrows. "A mushroom, Bowser? You sure?"

Bowser half-smiled, his eyes far away. "Yeah. Make it…pink…with white polka-dots."

The Monty mole's mouth spread into a smile even wider than Bowser's. "Well now, why didn't I think of that. We'll have the room done ASAP, Kingy."

Bowser nodded, looking away from the mole, but turned his eyes back to him to say, "I've never liked that name, y'know."

"Well, I've never liked working unpaid on national holidays either. Guess we're even."

"You're lucky I like you," Bowser joked, "or I might think of other presents I need finished before Peach leaves."

"I thought your birthday was when everyone _else_ worshiped _you_."

Bowser grinned as he replied, "Exactly. Got to get that one more name on my list of admirers, now don't I?"

"Oh, and your undying love is just a side-note, eh? Your lust to do whatever her whim is for a simple smile is just an asterisk note?"

Bowser laughed, shaking his head as he turned to leave. "I'd throw you in the dungeons now for that kind of razz, but then this dang room would never be done."

The monty mole chuckled. "Have a nice birthday, Bowser."

* * *

**Author's Note: **Well, I thought it was fun. Don't know if you did. :P

Next chapter certainly is! It's the start of the ball:D I can promise it's more than a chapter long, even without sidestories, so...yay ball. C: It's actually kind of scary to write becasuse it's the scene I play in my head the most... I've gotten cushy used to thinking and writing as I go. This is stressful for me. XD

Thank you all for continued support. :) I'm so happy I've gotten this far with no one getting tired of it yet! (or at least admitted it) Have a safe and happy remainder of your holidays.

-Razzi


	23. It Begins

**Foreword: **Mrahh...we've finally made it to the ball! My goal is to have the night done by _Change of Heart_'s second birthday. We'll see how that goes... haha

Anyway. Since we're in the ball, this is where the fluff happens. There should be enough fluff in the ball to suit the Princess and the Pea...fer serious. I'll try to make it not too excruciating.

And Disclaimer: I actually own two characters in this, but they're lame. All the good characters are Nintendo's, and I only take credit for ruining them where it sees fit.

* * *

Daisy pulled up in the parking lot of a charming, old inn, just off the edge of a small town. "This is where Madame Clearmont lives. And hopefully, this is where the other gem is, too!" She hopped out of the jeep, straightening her skirt once before smirking at Luigi. He had apparently walked around the car, hoping to let his girlfriend out. "Did you really forget I don't need that kind of stuff, Luigi? That's _Peach's_ deal, not mine."

She laughed; Daisy was feeling a lot more confident now that they were on their way and really on this adventure. Mario had actually been talking in the car ride, wanting to know as much about the gems as possible. Daisy had told him that she only knew what Bahurspat said, and that if they convinced Madame Clearmont to give them hers, they would be tied in count with the bad guy. Mario was already looking better than he had the day before, and practically ran into the inn. "Toldja this would work," Daisy bragged into Luigi's ear before they both took off to keep up with him.

The inside of the inn was a lot fuller than the parking lot made it seem. Apparently, this was the place to go for the townies as well as travelers. Koopas, toads, mice, goombas, and even penguins were at tables all around the room. Two toads and a short woman with streaked hair seemed to be the only servers.

Mario gave a double take towards the streaked-hair woman, having some small talk with a wrinkled goomba as she poured his coffee. She looked exactly like Merideth, his favorite teacher from the convention.

Daisy was distracted as she looked for any sign of Madame Clearmont, so Mario tapped Luigi's shoulder, his eyes locked on Merideth's unaware face. "Luigi, do you-a think that she looks-a like Miss Merideth?"

Luigi squinted, but his eyes popped open almost immediately. "Mumma Mia!" He whispered. "She _is-a_ Merideth!"

"…this place, so I was sure that she'd…" Daisy sensed her audience had lost their attention and she spun around to face them. "What are you boys goggling at?"

As if alerted by Daisy's change in tone, Merideth picked her head up. Her eyes instantly flew to the three humans, as they stood out in their vibrant outfits among the ho-hum creatures scattered all over. Merideth's face lit up and she said something quickly to the old goomba before walking over.

"Mario! Luigi! So nice to see you guys again. You know Princess Daisy?"

Daisy raised her eyebrows as she looked from Merideth to the brothers. "The real question is that you know them!"

Merideth grinned. "Well, sure. They were some of my best students at the plumbing classes."

Daisy laughed lightly. "I forgot you were a plumbing entrepreneur…guess I always just imagine you as Merideth, Madame Clearmont's little helper. Guys, this is Merideth. She's the daughter of the lady you're looking for."

Merideth raised her eyebrows. "You need my mom? Hold on, I'll go get her." She walked off, Mario still watching her leave and Luigi nervously watching him.

Daisy glanced at Mario's face and frowned for just a part of a second. She grinned again, snapping the brothers' attention to her as she said, "Small world, huh? Whodathunk?" Luckily, Daisy didn't have to make unusually awkward conversation long as Merideth and her mother, a woman even shorter than her daughter with frizzled graying hair, approached down the chestnut wood stairs.

After pushing through the crowd, Madame Clearmont smiled warmly. She gripped Daisy's hand and greeted, "Daisy, my sunny little princess! And I suppose these are the boys you talk about? Luigi and Mario? What a surprise to see you all!"

Daisy closed her eyes in pleasure. Mme Clearmont was much easier to work with, dramatically, than poor King Bahurspat. "It's nice to see you too, but unfortunately this isn't a social call…can we talk? Somewhere a bit more private?"

Mme Clearmont raised her eyebrows. "Well, of course. Here, Merideth. You get some coffee and biscuits and bring them to the poker room, would you? And bring some lemonade if you have a free hand." She led them all through the crowds of people and creatures, the brightly dressed trio of humans being led by the old woman drawing all their eyes.

"Here we are," Mme Clearmont said to herself as she unlocked an elegant looking door. She swung it wide to expose a poker room detailed with the finest of woodwork. It was a shame to see the state of the room, water-rings on the table and splintered shelves. It really had gorgeous potential. "My late husband used to thrive for wood-working. But he was ashamed, so he hid his talent here, in the manliest of our rooms." Mme Clearmont chuckled and pulled a seat out for herself. "So, Princess. What brings you here?"

As the Mario Brothers and Daisy sat down, they immediately told the old lady everything they knew about the gems and the adventure they had gone on thus far. Madame looked a little tense about the situation, and kept glancing over at the same overly-detailed, overflowing ashtray.

Finally, as they finished their story, Madame gave a weak smile. She looked away from her guests and murmured, "Merideth should have our treats by now; we must have missed her knock." She stood up and moved to the door, seemingly unfazed by anything the three guests had told her, except for her continued glances she stole at the ashtray.

The door opened wide and, sure enough, Merideth stood at the threshold, the coffee, biscuits, and lemonade in her hands. "I couldn't knock," she explained, and laid the food on the table.

"You should have tried, dearie. The door's too thick to hear on your side, so standing there getting the food cold isn't beneficial to anyone. Now I'm going to have to ask you to leave…"

"No-a, she can-a stay," Mario offered. "She said-a she likes adventures-a." Mario caught Daisy's icy glare and added, "But only if-a you wish-a so, Madame-a."

Madame Clearmont looked from Mario to Merideth to Daisy to Luigi to the ashtray. She sighed. "Alright, since Mario thinks it would be a good idea, go ahead and pull up a seat. I see you already thought ahead enough to bring an extra cup…"

Merideth blushed as she poured everyone their drinks.

Madame Clearmont quickly sealed the door and put the slide-lock through before sitting back down. "So anyway, Princess Daisy. I have the second gem for you…but I must warn you- be absolutely silent about your possessions. This inn gets as much scum as we do pleasant folk, and we can't go around announcing to all the villainous (but well-paying) guests that we have gems that could end the world."

"End the…what? Mother? What are you talking about?"

"Hush, Merideth. Don't ask questions until I'm finished discussing the matter with Princess Daisy," Madame Clearmont scolded. "Let me get the gem out." She walked over to the ashtray she had been eyeing and smiled reminiscently.

"Merideth's father spent the most time on this piece. Again, just got it in his head that if he widdled at something as manly as an ashtray, it would become manlier of a hobby. At least he didn't smoke himself."

She traced her finger along a curving rut, Mario thinking she was just being sentimental. But suddenly, the ashtray began to make chinking noises. A door swung open, revealing a set of drawers. Madame surprised them again by, instead of pulling a drawer open, twisting the middle knob until it completely unscrewed and she pulled it out. Attached to the hidden section of the large knob was a shimmering blue, circular gem.

Madame picked it off, being ever so careful as she handled the priceless gem. "Alone, they have no power. But together, they can tear apart worlds and bring them crumbling to the wielder's knees… we must keep them as safe as possible."

"Mother, _why _do you have a blue rock in Dad's ashtray? And where on earth did you learn how to open it like that?" Merideth was confused, and completely convinced that whatever was going on behind her back yet in front of her face was no good. Daisy herself was impressed with her friend. The old actress was even beginning to convince _her _that the gem was here all along and none of this was recently planned.

"I'll explain later, Merideth. But right now, we need to make sure the fate of two worlds is in the right hands. Daisy, do you have a safe place to keep the gems?"

Daisy fished around herself until she found her yellow purse. "Ta-da!"

Madame Clearmont raised an eyebrow. "What? Ran out of lunch sacks?"

xxxx0o0o0o0o0o0o0xxxx

Kammy rapped on Bowser Junior's door. "Junior, open up already. I need to make sure you're ready for the ball!"

"I don't want to go to the ball. I look like a dork!"

Kammy rolled her eyes and magically forced the door open. She saw Junior pouting on the side of his four-times-larger-than-necessary bed. He had cufflinks instead of wristbands and a green bowtie to match his shell, points filed to round edges. His bandana was nowhere to be seen and his hair was parted neatly down the middle.

The magikoopa smiled at Junior and straightened his bowtie. "You don't look like a dork, you look very handsome. Your father will be proud."

"You _really_ think so?" Junior asked, not in a curious, hopeful manner, but in one full of scorn and disbelief in the very idea.

Kammy bit her lip. "Well…he'll be pleased you got dressed up. Now come on, my handsome little koopaling. Let's get your brothers." She grabbed his claw and tugged, but felt herself fall under the stable pull of Junior.

He let go of her hand to cross his arms, leaving her crumpled on the floor. "No. I'm not leaving until you let me fix myself."

Glaring, Kammy pointed her wand at the youngest koopaling. Suddenly, his feet hit the floor and started marching him, as Junior flailed his arms in protest. "You stupid hag lady! Let me go! Let me go!"

"That's exactly what I'm doing, Junior," she cackled, following him with her wand pointed. She marched him down to where his six older siblings sat (Ludwig being off practicing), looking also more formal than usual, but no one as repulsively bad as Junior.

Wendy stifled a laugh, but Morton had no inhibitions to stop his booming laugh of mockery. "You look like a dork! Dorkface!"

Junior sneered at Kammy, and she hissed at the outspoken child, "oh, what do _you_ know."

Iggy, his Mohawk slightly gelled and looking more tame and wild at the same time, shook his head. "No, Kammy, I think Morton's right. He looks…like a dork."

Larry chimed in, "What were you _thinking_, KammKamm?"

Kammy glared at the seven repulsed koopalings. "Fine," she snarled, "I'll let him change. But it's not like I was his designer!"

"But you told them designers what to do, Kammy. And that's, like, just as bad," Wendy drawled. "What on Papa's earth made you think of making him such a total freak?"

Kammy had already released her magical hold on Junior and decided to ignore Wendy's question. "Are you all ready to go? Besides Junior?" The response was murmured "yes"s. Clearly the koopalings had debated the whole ball affair long enough to know they couldn't get out of it. And some, though trying to hide it, were actually enthused.

Wendy couldn't wait to dance in her stunning new shell, impressing the rich koopas from all over the Darklands. Roy knew it was one of the best business opportunities around, with the wealthy and prominent ready for investors…legal or not. And Lemmy had finally caught his partner's air of thrill in the bet towards Peach and Bowser's relationship, and saw this as the perfect place to get a footing.

Although Kammy had hardly begun lecturing the koopalings on do's and don't's at the ball, Junior came bustling down the stairs. His hair was back in the ponytail, though the gel put in from earlier helped the ponytail look almost refined. He had traded his dull shell for the one his father had tailored for him, and had his bandana faithfully tied in place of the bowtie. For time reasons, Junior had left the cufflings on. Besides, he thought they looked pretty dang cool. At least he didn't have a tuxedo on with them.

Kammy turned and rolled her eyes. "Can I at least…" she didn't finish asking for permission and magically tied his bandana into a short, white tie. "There. I think we can compromise with that, don't you?" She flashed a fake smile to let him know the question was rhetorical. "Alright, you all. Let's get going."

xxxx0o0o0o0o0o0o0xxxx

Bowser looked at himself up and down in the mirror. _Dang,_ was all he could think to compliment himself.

And, for once, he wasn't just being completely self-centric. His shell from Kamek looked absolutely stunning on him, his mane brushed neatly, yet still roguish. Everything about him just seemed…ten times more handsome. As he took a big breath in pride, he was reminded of the cologne. Subtle, but very savory. And, if Wendy was to be believed, it would be simply irresistible to Peach. _As if my body wasn't already enough!_

Reading the clock, Bowser knew he could leave. Actually, he should probably wait another two minutes, but…he was the king. The answer to all questions against him fit wonderfully here. Bowser opened the door from his bathroom into his bedroom and growled at Kamek. "Get that wrinkled nose out of your book and let me go."

Kamek looked through his glasses up at the clock. "You have two minutes, sire. I shouldn't let you out…but consider it a birthday gift."

Bowser crossed his arms as Kamek magically removed Kara's padlock. "Thanks," he mumbled as he began to leave.

Kamek did a double take at his king's word of thanks. "You're certainly welcome, sire. …Happy Birthday!"

Bowser was already out the door and half way to Peach's room down the hall. His heart was pounding, and the empty hallway seemed four times longer than usual. He could hear himself breath, and began to feel very stupid.

Finally, he reached the door and knocked. From inside the room, he could hear a clatter of heelsteps and other noises he couldn't imagine what they were. It seemed to take Princess Peach forever to open the door, but eventually it swung open and offered Bowser the most beautiful sight he had seen for years.

Peach literally glimmered, not only shining from the gems sewn into the gown, but also from the look in her sapphire eyes. She was beautiful everyday, but there was absolutely no comparison to the way she looked that evening.

Bowser realized his mouth was open, and tried to shut it, but then his throat started to swell. Finally, he squeaked out a "wow" amidst his fight to control his body.

Peach smiled softly. "You look very handsome yourself, sire…" Peach admired. She felt within herself a similar lack of words, her heart beating faster than the feet of a bandit as she outstretched her hand. Bowser tenderly took the silky glove in his own claw, keeping his eyes glued on her own.

After shaking his head to physically get his attention off of Peach, he shifted her arm to fall into the crook of his. "Are you ready?"

Peach met Bowser's eyes, seeing them shine and sparkle like a child's at Christmas. "Sure!" she squeaked, feeling more like a teenager than ever.

xxxx0o0o0o0o0o0o0xxxx

Kara looked at her watch. 5:28:36 pm. She smiled- it was so wonderful when things were on schedule. She nodded at Ludwig, appreciating his mutual adoration for order. The orchestra transitioned from their interlude to a beautiful processional, and the hundreds of guests eagerly looked at the huge oaken doors, the mythical Queen of the Cosmos engraved on each.

Kara looked down at her watch (5:29:52) and nodded to the koopas holding the doors. As expected, the eight seconds were exactly what was needed for the doors to begin opening.

Arm in arm, Peach and Bowser began their walk into the room. Bowser was grinning as he admired the stuffy ballroom, decked out with statues of himself. Peach's eyes were also pulled away from those of her date's. She mouthed "wow" as she admired the glorious three-story ballroom. The main dancing floor was a beautiful parquet mosaic, the walls a stunning marble to match the pillars.

The murals on the walls and ceilings were nothing like those Peach had seen through the palace of battle scenes and burnt adversaries, but rather of angelic koopas, majestic kings, beautiful queens, and stunning festivities. Peach didn't have to squint long to realize that one of the murals with newer paint included a wedding- her own. She felt a blush creeping up her cheeks, but couldn't pull her eyes off the painting of what had never been.

Bowser didn't see what had caught his princess's eye, but still pulled her along as they turned the corner. His polite tug jogged Peach's attention, and she was brought back to earth. They began their curling ascent up the spiral staircase, leading them both to one of two elegant tables. Peach waved graciously around, followed by a smattering of applause.

The King looked at Peach and smiled. He had never been happier in his life…this wasn't his wedding day, but to Koopa tradition, bringing a date to one's birthday ball was almost as big. And she was so gorgeous…her smile, her honestly happy smile, made her beauty surpass anything else. Bowser supposed she could be wearing rags and still be the most beautiful creature in the world at that moment. But, of course, he really did prefer the stunning gown that sparkled in the light. She was like his own personal beacon…everyone in the room would look at Peach, and everyone in the room would know with whom she came.

Pulling out her chair, Bowser whispered "I love you," into Peach's ear. She flushed slightly before whispering back, "I know you do." He smiled and pulled out his own chair before sitting. A silent waiter served him a platter of food, then Peach, and then a flurry of the koopas with plates served the entire table.

Seated next to Peach was Bowser Junior, getting very frustrated that his Mama Peach hadn't even realized he was there yet. Next to him was all his siblings save Ludwig, and on Bowser's other side was Kammy, Kamek, and his other lead koopas. The other family guests, siblings and cousins Bowser hadn't spoken to since his birthday last year, were farther down the table. All the other fabulous and wealthy guests sat on another table, on the other balcony across the way.

Ludwig continued to lead his orchestra in a quieter melody through the dinner, allowing for the conversation on the floor below them to simmer over the food.

Peach was shocked at the koopa eating habits. Even at such an elegant dinner, they ate four times as much and three times as fast as any human could. The waiters clearly expected each guests' food intake, what with Bowser's plate being the largest and most filled and Peach's the most meager. She noticed a few of the entrees were completely missing from her plate, replaced with slightly off-color versions.

"Bowser? Why is my rice a different color than yours?" She asked quietly, trying not to disrupt the conversation the diplomats a few seats down were attempting to involve the Koopa King in.

Bowser looked over at Peach's plate, unashamed as he ignored the other conversation. "Because…mine aren't rice. Oh, and they didn't clean up your salad. Don't eat those," he recommended, pointing at the egg-shaped red fruits.

"The tomatoes? Why?"

"Because those aren't tomatoes either." He picked them off her plate and popped one in his mouth. Bowser swallowed it whole and grinned back at Peach, feeling the glaring eyes of Kara as she walked by. "Yup. Definitely not tomatoes."

Peach giggled a little bit, letting Kammy drag Bowser back into 'proper' conversation. She looked at her plate and smiled, delicately taking a bite of the finely-cooked steak. The meal was just heavenly, and she kept comparing it to her first meal with Bowser she had had this week. This time around, the atmosphere was a lot more pleasant.

Soft conversation continued for all three courses, Peach glancing at Bowser through the whole dinner. He seemed almost in pain, forcing himself to pay attention to the conversations people kept involving him in and looking very awkward with his utensils.

Peach kept wanting to jump up and show him how to use his spoon correctly, but invisible cords seem to keep her down, and the same cords seemed to bind her from talking freely with anyone at all. Every time Bowser caught her staring and grinned back she flushed, and several times her conversations with the koopalings would end abruptly as she felt her heart flip from Bowser's booming laugh and lost her train of thought.

The entire dinner was just a flurry of heated emotion, and without fail, if she listened quietly her name was among the happy gossip farther down the table at all times. Perhaps the heat she always felt was from Bowser's leg that kept "accidently" brushing her own, or his eyes that she almost always felt on her face. Whatever it was, it made her fork shake within her hand, but also made the food taste so much sweeter.

xxxx0o0o0o0o0o0o0xxxx

Ludwig was absolutely lost in the performance. Though the music was soft and nothing but atmosphere for the elegant feasts below him, to this conductor it was both heaven and hell, an ornate balancing act to make the music absolutely perfect, where the smallest of mistakes could bring the whole spiraling, delicate masterpiece crumbling to the ground.

The piece neared its end, and with a flourish Ludwig neatly brought the octet to a diminuendo. The next movement, a sweet and gentle flute solo, flowed like a brook gently charting a new course through a gully in the wood. Ludwig sighed in pleasure, tenderly placing his baton on the stand and wringing out his hands. He didn't need to conduct the soloist.

After shaking his cufflinks off his sweaty wrists, he found his seat next to the first violinist. The shaky koopa smiled at his conductor. "Lovely work, sir."

Ludwig shook out his head, sweat droplets flipping from off his mess of hair. "As with you, Gregory. But now…it shall be nice to have a quiescent moment. And one with victuals, I do trust! I am simply famished."

Gregory nodded with a wide smile. "We're very blessed to have a break. That poor soloist won't be able to eat for a long time."

"Indeed, she is going to be fasting for quite some time tonight…_most_ of the night, I daresay."

"So sire, what do you think the ball will be like?"

"The postprandial ball? Ah, it should be intresting…His Majesty Father has not escorted a lady for years; if nothing else, such an occasion will certainly conceive a copious amount of persiflage among the attendants." He chuckled, graciously accepting a plate of the meal served a story below them.

Gregory nodded with a bit of a smile. He ate quietly, watching the flutist as she preformed sweetly and serenely. He swallowed, and then inquired further, "yes, I gathered that much, but what do _you_ think it'll be like? Since this is your father's first date, what do _you_ think that _means_?"

"You seem quite the inquisitor tonight, Gregory. I suppose…I suppose my father is very eager. He really despises these types of occasions and kvetches about them more than almost any other affair. And yet, being with Her Highness Princess Peach is making him quite ebullient about it. He might actually grasp the Zeitgeist about these balls tonight…just maybe.

"If Father can reach tonight's terminus without having any bibulous missteps, there shouldn't be a single gaffe that can cause any sort of calumny. And there are enough highly respectable witnesses here tonight that no taradiddle should ruin it either."

"So you really think this is going to be a success?"

"What do you mean by _success_? Tonight was not meant to be a fructuous night in anything but being a _convivial_ night. One cannot measure the amusement a night brings, Gregory. You're being terribly abstruse."

Gregory shifted his weight uncomfortably, suddenly wishing he was the hungry flutist and not being grilled by his conductor. "Well, you know this is His Majesty King Bowser's first date with Princess Peach…I guess I'm wondering if you think he can get her on his good side tonight."

A dangerous looked flashed in Ludwig's eyes. "You are beginning to sound like my siblings, Gregory. Making malapropos comments is not something I expected my highly-respected concert master to do. My father is _not_ here to woo the princess. If she falls to him on her own accord, than so be it! My father wishes to be a very providential person. He is not maladroit in any account, but that does not mean he is beholden to use every opportunity to get Peach to engage herself with him…Such inimical qualities are below even he!

"My father may have kidnapped her, and he may have forced her to the altar, and he may have convinced my youngest sibling of her maternal involvement. But even through such apparent cruel and obscene acts, my father _respects_ Peach. She is not an accolade at the end of a race; she is a person whom he _loves_. And when one loves another person, one does not treat them like something to be attained at the end of 'success'. So consider this your tocsin, my friend. Peach may be my father's dream, but she is not a measuring stick of his 'success'."

Gregory closed his eyes and nodded. "I'm sorry for my offense, sire."

Ludwig nodded and silently rose from his seat. Tonight was big for a lot of people…he had to make it work for all of them.

xxxx0o0o0o0o0o0o0xxxx

Bowser was finally having an interesting conversation with someone other than Peach when Kamek cleared his throat twice. The old magikoopa gave Bowser a meaningful look and was answered with a curt nod. Bowser in turn looked over at a stately magikoopa adorned in all black standing at the top of the staircase. Ludwig ceased his orchestra, allowing for him to speak.

"Announcing the commencement of the ball. The floor will be opened now to His Majesty King of the Koopas and all of the Darklands Lord Bowser of the Royal Family of the highly respected KoopaKings and Supreme and Adored Emperor over all under his Mighty and Powerfully Cruel Rule and Her Highness Princess Peach Toadstool of the Mushroom Kingdom, leading with the traditional King's Waltz, conducted by Prince Ludwig Koopa, head orchestrator of the Great Volcanopalace Symphonic Orchestra and all other Palace orchestras, including a portion especially arranged for tonight's events by the conductor himself." The magikoopa stepped aside and Ludwig led his brass section in a regal fanfare.

With a claw extended, Bowser helped Peach out of her chair and onto the floor. She was only slightly aware of the dozens of eyes upon her; Bowser's eyes seemed to grasp her attention over them all. "We think that he uses magic to help him get through that without a single breath. Only the magikoopas can get through it without breaking a sweat," he murmured in her ear. If the joke was meant to keep her calm, it didn't do much good. Bowser's husky voice and warm breath whispering in her ear only made the butterflies in Peach's stomach fly even faster.

The couple reached the top of the stairs and Bowser painfully let go of Peach's hand. As tradition read, Bowser walked down the right staircase, Peach taking the left. Although the separation was clearly torturous to the king, the princess found the break exactly what she needed.

_It's just a ball. I've been to more of these than I can count. Just a ball. And I just had a delicious meal- I shouldn't have _room _for these silly butterflies. Just. A. Ball._ Peach took deep breaths, her painted smile not giving her away in the least.

Once her foot touched the stone floor (at the precise moment as Bowser's), the orchestra began the beautiful waltz's opening movement, passed down from KoopaKing to KoopaKing for centuries. The music had just a hint of the preferred minor music of the koopas, but all of the regality and lusciousness that had ever been heard in a waltz. The unimaginable acoustics of the room, along with the warm stone floor and stunning décor, put Peach in a state of mind far from any ball she had been to. This was far better.

Peach saw a worried look flash through Bowser's eyes, his smile wavering slightly even as he took Peach's hands. She could hear him counting, and suddenly she could feel her organs again. Her heart was most definitely there…moreso than she really needed to feel it.

"Bowser, don't count," she quietly coached. "Feel the music in your feet and in your heart. It should make you feel light and happy without even thinking about the steps… If you must count, do it in your head."

Bowser continued counting under his breath until he could find a suitable moment to reply. "I can't-two-three-must-fo-cus-I-can't-waltz-one-two-three-"

Peach smiled, let Bowser spin her out, and then took position back. "Watch me," she suggested, "instead of your feet. Go ahead and get lost in thought…your feet will know what to do."

Bowser easily obliged to Peach's invitation, all too willing to stare into her happy blue eyes. Before he could realize it, they were moving as one, twisting and turning, spinning and jumping. Fairly soon, the floor was filled with couples, all spinning and dancing in harmony with each other. None were as connected as the guests of honor, locked in eachother's eyes, letting the music lead them across the floor.

The waltz lasted for several minutes, Peach and Bowser completely silent, as the music seemed to request. Finally, with a bit of silence, the waltz changed movements. Peach gasped as a familiar trill sounded and Bowser, now much more fleet on his feet, asked, "what is it?"

"I helped Ludwig write this part!" Peach exclaimed, dancing lightly with Bowser through the upbeat tempo of the waltz.

"It's really good," he complimented, with a grin.

"Well, my part was over long ago, Bowser. But thanks for trying," she teased.

"I never thought you'd help write our first song together," Bowser told her with a curious expression. Peach raised her eyebrows, very uncertain how to reply to his odd statement. Bowser caught the moment of awkwardness and grinned, hoping to sweep it away with Peach as he lifted her through the dance step. "I just mean I've thought of moments with you a lot. As much as I brag that you've done the same, I'm sure not as much."

"Well, I've thought about it this week…the ball, I mean…" Peach answered quietly, afraid that her face might be turning the color of her dress.

"Yeah?" Bowser said through his goofy grin. "That's good…you're my best birthday present, know that Peach?"

Bowser's spontaneous romantic compliments were doing no good for Peach's blushing condition. "That's sweet, Bowser…I don't know what to say."

Bowser's grin changed to his more familiar sinister sneer. "Then tell me you love me back."

"Not when you ask like that!" Peach scoffed, speaking before she could really process his request.

"Well," Bowser began, trying to be romantic again (since it seemed to work lately), "_I_ love you."

"I know, I know," Peach laughed while Bowser lightly dipped her. When he pulled her back up, her laugh was gone and she had a strange look on her face. Why did Bowser's question seem as normal as when he confessed his own end? Probably because he'd accused her of loving him (whether joking or not…) many times. But this…confusion…never followed that.

Astutely, Bowser knew what was worrying Peach. As determined as he was to have her love him back, he wanted her to enjoy herself more. With a sigh, Bowser murmured, "hey, listen to the music. It should make you light and happy, not… whatever emotion you are now."

Peach rolled her eyes, grateful for the invitation to get her mind off confusing things. "Good stolen advice, your majesty." He waltzed with her, leading her lightly through the crowds of people. "Did you know the waltz is my favorite dance?"

Bowser looked like he was about to snarl. "It sure as heck isn't mine."

Peach nodded, "I can see why. But to me, it just…really makes me feel like a princess."

"You don't have to do some stupid dance to be a princess, Peach. You already wear dresses and crowns every single day. Not to mention get saved from horrible creatures by your own personal knight."

Peach giggled, imagining the Mario Brothers as knights. "Sorry to break it to you, but the Mario Brothers refuse to be knighted."

Bowser raised his eyebrow, a hint of a smile on his lips. "What are you talking about, Peach? _I'm_ your knight, not those jerks."

Laughing a little bit, Peach was surprised she hadn't realized where Bowser had been going. She told him honestly, "I hadn't even thought of them for days before you said that." Bowser looked extremely upset at himself for bringing it up unnecessarily, pouting in a strangely cute way. Peach giggled a little bit. "But I'm not sure spinning in a circle will help the situation, Bowser…"

He mumbled, "oh," and immediately stopped dancing, looking at his feet and reevaluating the waltz. He began waltzing with Peach in a much more fluid manner, with less pivoting. "That better?"

"Much." Peach replied, smiling at his eager eyes. "There you go, saving me again."

* * *

**Author's Note:** That was hard to write, like I told you guys last chapter, because I have such high expectations for the ball. So I'm kind of turning it on its head (a leeeeetle bit) in the writing style or whatever so it's less scary. The right side of my brain has too high of expectations for the left side.

Anyway. Hope you're still here and still enjoying it a bit. I'm enjoying writing it, so...the idea of people actually enjoying _reading_ this stuff makes me go C: all over the place. Sometimes I even :D. Bet you guys didn't know human lips were capable of forming emoticons! ()

-Razzi


	24. Something There

**Foreword:** I think it's really funny that I actually thought I'd have Bowser's Birthday done by today. :P I've a feeling it's going to take me at LEAST two chapters more. (which is too bad if you've been excited for Mario's sidestory, because that one takes off "tomorrow", really)

Anyway- today marks CoH's second birthday! This is simply surreal...year one was like "wow this is old" but now, it feels like the story's taking on a life of its own. I keep worrying about this being the start of its terrible twos, or worrying about temper-tantrums now it's a "toddler". Seriously...that's kind of weird. :P Regardless, I'm very happy I've made it this far, and I'm still a bit in denial you all have to..for those unbelievably attractive and beautiful souls who have kept reading this for all these years...holy cow. :D

To celebrate, I did two things- I updated the fanart page on ebtwisty's homepage (go check it out!) with some of my own illustrations including Peach's gown design, as well as a beautiful piece of (rather old) fanart. Also, this chapter is basically a series of songfics...I don't really like songfics in the middle of not-song-fics, but since it's a ball, I made an exception. ;) Because of this, I'm saving Disclaimer for the Author's Note so the songs aren't given away. However, I suggest reading each section along with the music to add atmosphere. And sorry about this long foreword!

* * *

Even if you didn't know it was his birthday, your eyes were drawn to Bowser. He was almost as radiant as his date, without the added benefit of a shining gown. Bowser and Peach spun around like trained dancers, talking lightly with stars in their eyes. He would grin at her, she would titter back. They seemed oblivious to the scores of watchers, dancers that seemed there only to add atmosphere.

The gaiety didn't extend to Kammy's lonely table. She watched, her eyes glittering for a completely different reason. She took a sip of the drink in front of her, not even sure what it was. Why did it matter so much? So what if Peach was Bowser's date, so what if she wouldn't dance with him at all? Her king had his wish, her king was happy. Wasn't that all that mattered?

Kamek's eyes turned away from the dancing royalties for a second long enough to see Kammy sitting alone. He excused himself from dancing with the foreign koopa and walked towards the fellow magikoopa. "What are you doing sitting down?"

Kammy tossed her head towards Bowser. "No partner."

Kamek smiled mischievously and put out a hand towards her. "Says who?" He looked down at her, locking eyes as she offered a weak smile.

"Are you going to ask me to dance, Kamek?" Kammy smirked back, reminding him of the years they'd spent together in this palace. At a ball just like this, years ago, when Kammy was maddeningly persistent in dancing with her magikoopa friend.

"Would you like to dance, Kammy?" He whispered as she stared back. He noticed her eyes flicker towards the center of the ballroom and his heart caught slightly.

She sighed. "Since you asked." She stood up and took his hand, immediately surprised by the spin that Kamek used to bring her fully into the waltz. It took her a few moments to get adjusted to his speed and precision, not matching her melancholy attitude at all.

Kamek smiled as he watched his friend laugh lightly as she adjusted to his pace, her eyes focused on her feet…a better place, he thought, for them than the royalties, even if it wasn't on him. Finally, she shook her head up, her grey hair shaking. He noticed how it was conditioned to look elegant rather than ragged, matching her purple outfit that was also slightly more elegant than usual. He was proud to be dancing with her, but her smile eventually faded, her eyes distant and locking with the central couple every time she faced them.

"They really do make a sweet couple…" he told her quietly.

"Gold hair, with a gentle curl…" she murmured in response. "She looks as pretty as he is tonight."

Kamek's throat was clenching, but he tried to continue the conversation best he could. "They're radiant…I've never seen His Majesty this happy over something like dancing before."

Kammy seemed uneager to continue the waltz, so Kamek let her change the steps to match her desired position. She was silent. "This is the first time you haven't gone with him, isn't it?"

Kammy smiled and nodded, her eyes faraway as she mentioned, "He even took me for three of his married years…it's hard, now…Peach…"

"She's happy." Kamek whispered. "You have no idea how much Bowser wanted to see happiness from her because of him…how happy that _makes_ him."

"Actually, Kamek," Kammy snapped, her icy eyes meeting his, "I do." The ice immediately melted and by the time Kamek had finished her spinning lift, Kammy's eyes were back on Bowser and Peach.

"If you want…Kammy…I can suggest Bowser give you a turn tonight…" He searched for something in her eyes to resemble gratitude, but that longed for moment flashed by all too soon.

"That wouldn't soften the ache I'd feel when…" Kammy sighed, swallowing something before finishing with a whispered, "when reality sets back in". She closed her eyes, grabbing Kamek's lapel and pulling herself closer to him.

Kamek frowned, looking down at Kammy's weak expression. He sighed. "I wish…"

"Don't wish." She chastised, pulling a little bit away from Kamek. "Don't even start." She glared into Kamek's eyes, her expression hard to read with a strange mix of compassion, anger, and sorrow. "Wishing…wishing only wounds the heart…trust me, I know." She shook her head and looked into Kamek's eyes.

"Hey. Kammy," Kamek started, directing her attention immediately. "Everyone has somebody, even if you don't figure out who they are. Don't get upset that Bowser has Peach- your life isn't going to change any. He's always wanted her, and wants her hardly any more now than he did when he was married. He'll still need you, just…for different reasons. He loves her so, but that doesn't mean you're useless. You're so…not…useless. You're an amazing girl."

Kammy nodded, looking at Kamek with a lump in her throat. "I know…but still…" Kammy sighed, looking over Kamek's shoulder as if they were dancing as happy as any couple on the floor. She looked at the happiest couple of all and her heart panged. _I'm not _that_ girl._

xxxx0o0o0o0o0o0o0xxxx

After the long-winded and run-on-sentence-heavy magikoopa declared it time for dessert, Bowser grinned and grabbed Peach's hand. She could feel his pulse speed up in excitement as he pulled her up the stairs. She laughed, running to keep up with him as he bounced up the stairs. Obviously, the formal part of the evening was over, and even more obviously, Bowser was happy about it.

He kept hold of Peach's glove as he got to his same seat from before, Peach sitting down in a much more respectable manner, though she was still laughing. Her face was flushed from the hasty run to keep up with the bounding Koopa King. "Alright," Bowser boomed, "Bring on the Dessert!"

The delegates and attendees around them all tittered lightly, but Peach could see a few of them rolling their eyes or sighing. Kara, over in the corner, was downing what looked like an entire bottle of head-ache medicine. This somehow made her laugh even harder, and she was glad she had left her hair down for the night.

Bowser had his fists (and elbows) firmly on the table, grinning like a kid in the candy store as the waiter placed a huge bowl in front of him. Centered in the bowl was a ridiculously large mound of ice cream, surrounded by cookies, cakes, and other delicacies of all sorts and shapes. The waiter poured hot-fudge dramatically all over the bowl and finished with a dollop of some strange purple cream.

The same show, with food on a smaller scale, was preformed in front of Peach. The purple cream was replaced with a pink one that smelt strongly of…peaches. The princess giggled, a little surprised the pun hadn't come earlier. The waiter smirked in silent reply.

Bowser hadn't waited to eat like he had at dinner, and his hands were immediately in the bowl, mashing everything together like a blender. It was almost a shame- the food was arranged simply beautifully in what Peach was told to be an exact edible replica of Downtown VolcanoPalace City. It even included a few finely-detailed chocolate Bowsers amid the cake buildings.

Peach looked around her bowl for a utensil, but couldn't even find a spoon. She frowned. "Bowser, what am I-"

Peach stopped short of her sentence in complete shock at Bowser, shoveling the mostly brown blend into his mouth with his bare hands. He looked up at her, dessert dripping through his fingers and down his chin.

Peach laughed, finding it hard to keep a straight face. Bowser laughed back, unaware what was even funny, but Peach's laugh was utterly contagious. As he laughed, dessert spayed from his mouth all over the tablecloth, luckily not hitting Peach's gown. They laughed and laughed, attracting the attention of the delegates and family members down the table.

Soon, Peach was having trouble breathing, completely red in the face. She grabbed the glass of water in front of her and tried to drink it. Unfortunately, she looked up at Bowser, still laughing loud and long, still dripping with some unintelligible mix of desserts. She spit out the water and laughed again, scaring a few ladies from down the table. They screeched as the water splashed them, and then began to laugh as well. How did they expect to stay clean during this anyway?

It didn't take long for the entire table to be laughing almost as hysterically as Peach and Bowser, fistfuls of the beautifully crafted ice cream volcanoes being flung across the table. Cookies were being thrown like grenades, and Morton went as far as to dump his entire bowl on the head of his brother.

Through the spontaneous food fight and raucous laughter, the waiters (now donned in raincoats) were delivering more food to the guests to replace that which was lost, including bringing Morton an entirely new city of dessert.

Peach retreated to under the table, both in fear of getting her dress messed more than it already was, and also to try to catch her breath. Bowser retreated under the table as well, laughing in a continuous decrescendo with Peach, until finally they could speak.

"Follow me," Bowser said between low laughs. He put out a claw, and Peach quickly took it, letting him whisk her away from under the table. Luckily, the guests were too preoccupied with each other and the flying desserts to notice Bowser grab an untouched bowl of dessert with one hand and Peach with the other and steal them both away.

"Where…where are we going?" Peach asked amid her own continuous laughter.

"Here!" Bowser said as he stopped abruptly. On the wall he was facing, a meticulously painted mural showed several koopas rushing through a beautiful garden gate. Peach was questioning Bowser's sanity for just a second as he reached for the painted gate handle, but was shocked to see it was so realistic _because_ it was real.

He swung the door that seamlessly melded with the mural open to expose to Peach a hidden broom-closet, filled with equipment for keeping the huge ballroom clean and mysteriously glowing without a light source. "Go in and turn left," he commanded.

"Are you sure?" Peach questioned, looking into the dark closet and seeing nothing but rags, mops, and cleaning substances.

"This is where I go when I'm sick of these type of things…come on, before someone sees us and brings us back!"

Peach laughed at the odd statement and rushed in, her heels clicking on the dusty floor. When she turned left at the back of the closet, the room's light source was very apparent. It was another broom-closet hallway toward the main power-source Bowser had shown her…had it really been four days ago?

Bowser came behind her, still laughing a bit with the dessert bowl in his hand. "This is far enough from the lava that you should be fine."

She smiled and took a cookie out of the bowl, dipping some ice cream onto it and taking a bite. Her eyes rolled back in delight as she savored its sweetness. Bowser watched her with adoring eyes and a tender smile, but then quickly frowned. "I guess I should have gotten two bowls. I never eat this like civilized people do."

Peach giggled. "I'm fine if you want to mix it, Bowser. Today _is_ your birthday." She laughed at his delighted expression as he began to mix it again, spraying some chocolate out of the bowl as he went.

Peach squealed, but then just gave a defeated laugh. "This dress…it's so beautiful, but now its got chocolate and dirt and who knows what else _all over_ it. I'm afraid I don't look as pretty as I should in it."

Bowser glared at Peach, almost angry. "What are you saying? I _love _you, _and_ the way you look tonight. Including the gown under the chocolate _and_ the chocolate on top." Peach smiled softly, with a hint of sorrow still on her face. He smiled softly back, "You're lovely, with your smile so warm…" Peach smiled a bit more, blushing just slightly as Bowser gently put his chocolately hand on her cheek, "and your cheeks so soft…I love you, _especially _the way you look tonight."

Peach's heart was overflowing, spilling some sort of sweet liquid warmth over the butterflies in her stomach, choking up her throat. "Bowser," she started, but her throat wouldn't let her say what intelligible muck her heart was yelling. "You're making me even messier."

With each word, even if they weren't those Peach wanted to say or Bowser wanted to hear, the tenderness between them grew, tearing fear apart. Bowser laughed a little bit, Peach laughing in response. "And that laugh!" Bowser started, laughing a bit himself as his eyes shown with love. "That laugh, that wrinkles your nose…" He couldn't finish either, and they both laughed a bit more.

It wasn't long before the dessert being shared by hand reached the same fate as those in the ball room. Peach had taken off her gloves to eat the dessert, and they both had dessert in their hands, chasing each other around the dimply lit room, laughing hysterically.

Peach bent over to catch her breath, and Bowser seized the moment to catch her in his arms. She gasped in surprise, and Bowser used the seconds of her open mouth to smear some dessert into it. Laughing, Peach spat most of it out, swallowing the rest. She spun around, still in his arms, and smacked his chest, leaving a chocolate handprint. Bowser laughed, his signature laugh that Peach had heard so often this week, she had began to think of it as _her_ laugh, not his frightening laugh of evil.

He cocked an eyebrow as he looked straight down at her happy face. His expression melted into a toothy smile, and he took a rare clean finger to gently wipe of the chocolate he had left on her cheek earlier. He wiped it slower than he probably had to, but as Peach's eyes were closed and her smile just slightly open, he decided she didn't mind.

Bowser licked his finger clean, and then smiled back down at Peach. "Never, ever change," Bowser whispered to Peach. She wished he would stop whispering so close to her… his voice was too husky and made her mind spin in ways no mind should. And yet, the whispering continued, "'cause I love you…just the way you look tonight."

xxxx0o0o0o0o0o0o0xxxx

Morton grinned at the back of Iggy's head, watching crumbs and goop drip out of it. He took a deep breath before shouting, "BWAHAHA. You're such a-"

Iggy spun around, his glasses practically steamed from the fire in his twitching eyes. With just that look, he silenced Morton, and then spun back around, making sure to get as much of the dessert debris to fling from his Mohawk into Morton's face.

The koopalings, along with all the other dinner guests, were in line for the attention of the magikoopas. Kammy, Kamek, and a few others including the one in black robes all stood at the top of the stairs. With one sweep of their wands, the guest would instantly be reverted to their appearance before the fiasco, and then proceeded down the stairs.

Wendy, just behind Morton, sighed loudly and tapped her foot impatiently. Of all the guests, she had avoided contact with food the best and looked cleaner even than some of those who had the stains magically removed. However, she also seemed the most upset about the ordeal. "Would you boys _hurry up_? Like, seriously. Some of us actually _care_ about how we look."

"Complaining won't win you the race, Wendy!" Lemmy laughed from a line away.

Wendy rolled her eyes and spat at Lemmy, "Yeah, because I'm _totally_ racing you. It's what I've been looking forward to _all night_. Be quiet, idiot." Just then, she felt one of the spikes on her shell being tugged. Angrily, she spun around and shouted at Bowser Jr, "_What?_"

"Look, I found Mama Peach!" Junior pointed at the wall just a few yards away, Peach chatting with Bowser as he seemed to rubbing it, almost like he was trying to cover something up.

"What's she doing over _there_?" Larry asked, having overheard Junior from behind Lemmy.

"And why was she with King Dad so long?" Morton grumbled, thankfully not trying to attach a poorly-constructed insult to his question.

Wendy bit the inside of her cheek as she too tried to figure the situation out. "Well…her dress seems just fine…"

Rolling his eyes, Junior corrected, "no, it's covered in junk. She needs to get cleaned up just as bad as Iggy."

Wendy rolled her eyes right back. "That's, like, not what I meant. She obviously didn't-" After gasping, Wendy's eyes went wide and her lips seemed to disappear.

"She didn't what? Wendy! Didn't what?" Junior pestered, tugging on her spike again.

"Do you _mind_, Junior?" Wendy sneered, ignoring his question.

Iggy glared at Wendy over his shoulder, hissing, "way to be obvious, Wendy."

"You were thinking it too!" She accused, glaring back.

"Thinking _whaaaat_?" Junior begged.

Wendy spun around on her heels again, peeling a cookie that was plastered to Junior's face off. She stuffed it in his mouth and hissed, "Thinking that you need to, like, totally _shut up._ Mmkay?" Junior glared at Wendy, but was silent as he took out the cookie and started eating it.

Iggy watched his father and Peach get into line with everyone else, Bowser pushing the guests aside and propelling Peach forward in line. He grinned, glad to not only be distracted from Wendy's immaturity but also get to watch the two interact.

Peach shook her head lightly, smiling at Bowser. "Just take your time, now…" she told him, pulling him back to where they _should_ be in line.

Bowser pointed to the magikoopas and Peach shook her head again. Bowser grinned at Peach. "You want to stay for awhile?"

"Well…we don't need to cut in line, Bowser…we'll be fine."

"You just want to spend more time with me, don't you?" He smirked at the light-hearted accusation.

"Yes," Peach laughed back, "You make me smile. Please, stay here for awhile." She laughed again, but the smile plastered on her face didn't seem to portray it as a joke.

Bowser smiled warmly, whispering, "okay," and he wrapped his arms around her.

Peach was a little too comfortable, feeling his natural warmth. Yet, these were feelings that she adored…she could feel tingles, starting in her toes and going all the way up to the top of her head, until it made her crinkle her nose with more laughter. "Just take your time…" she whispered, double meaning pounding in her heart…

Bowser squeezed her a bit more, before slowly releasing his hold. He laughed, a little bit to relieve the stress they were both feeling…those bubbly feelings of anxiety.

The cold was almost piercing to Peach when Bowser's warmth left her, but she couldn't retreat back to his arms…she…just couldn't. And yet when those feelings where gone…wherever they went…she always _knew_. She knew…but at the same time, didn't know at all.

Wendy fluttered her claws to her chest and sighed dramatically. Bowser Junior glared up at her gooey, practically love struck face and hissed, "what is it _now_, Wendy?"

Her eyes rolled, ruining her façade completely, and she hissed, "It's Dad and Peach. Look at them. You're, like, supposed to be my _partner_ in this thing, and you don't even know what love is. Like, seriously."

Junior frantically spun around, about to shout in joy, but Wendy smacked her claw over his mouth in anticipation. It didn't stay there long as she pulled it back, screeching "eww!" and smearing the gooey mess she had picked up back onto Junior. "You're _disgusting_, Junior. And _no_, they're not in love. Yet. That's, like, _our_ job. But look at your Mama Peach…he's got her acting like a child, now. He's keeping her dry and warm, and she's making him smile. It's-"

"What are you _talking_ about?"

"I just…mmm." Wendy had reverted back to her gooey, charmed expression, watching them in adoration. "The feeling starts in the soul…then you loose all control…"

"Are you still talking about Mama Peach and Bowser?"

Wendy glared back at Junior and turned around. She hissed, "You just don't get it," and said nothing else.

Junior frowned, and turned back to look at Peach and Bowser. Peach's hand was uncomfortably holding her other hand, as if it wished to be somewhere else. Bowser snaked his between the two gloves and smirked down at the princess. Junior saw Peach avert her eyes from Bowser's, although her face lit up and he had made her smile…if only just for awhile.

xxxx0o0o0o0o0o0o0xxxx

The dance floor had been shaking for awhile now…not because the volcano was erupting, but because Bowser's guests had been jumping up and down so much. They dancing and shouted, women constantly fighting to keep their elegant gowns and high-heeled shoes on correctly while the men tried to out dance each other.

Peach laughed and laughed, then needlessly excused herself from the almost-moshpit to take a breather. She broke out, taking a deep breath and wiping her face. The princess spotted the dessert buffet, with a large punchbowl taking center stage. Smiling, Peach hurried over.

By the time she had poured herself a glass, the music changed to a slower, calmer kind of dance music. Bowser's shape was clear (as he was several heads taller than many of his koopa guests) as he broke towards Peach. She smiled and shook her head lightly, hoping to answer his unspoken question. Hoarsely, she shouted over the music, "I'm sitting this one out, Bowser."

Apparently ignoring Peach, Bowser had lumbered all the way over to the table where others were also filling up their glasses with red punch. He put out a claw, and with raised eyebrows asked, "you sure? It's a bit slower…"

Peach put her free hand into Bowser's, but remained adamant. "Yeah, I'm sure…Tell you what. First _real_ slow song you can take me back out. By then I should have my breath…maybe even my voice!"

Bowser chuckled; he ran his thumbclaw over Peach's gloved hand, sitting comfortably in his own. "There won't be a slow song until after the break-dance thing, Peachy."

Peach opened her mouth to reply, but closed it when she noticed a queue of women behind Bowser. "You know…" she started, as quiet as she could over the loud music, "it looks like you've still got plenty of partners to choose from until then."

Peach pulled her hand out of Bowser's and turned her back to him, signaling to the women behind him that their conversation was over and they could now vulture. The mushroom princess couldn't help but hold her glass where she could see Bowser's contorted reflection and watch the women.

She watched as a rather large, wealthy -looking koopa woman exuberantly greeted him, taking him out to the dance floor to rejoin the crowd with her. Peach smiled faintly, looking over her shoulder until she couldn't see him anymore. Suddenly, the idea to catch her breath for a few songs seemed very stupid.

A female toady, wearing a draping red gown that exposed her bouncy blonde curls situated herself next to the princess. "Enjoying yourself, Peach?" As Peach turned to answer her, she thought it amusing how…normal…the koopas all looked when they weren't in battle clothes. In fact, the only way Peach could tell the toady apart from any magikoopa there that night was her thick glasses and buckteeth.

"Yeah, I am, actually." Peach answered, still looking for Bowser's form among his people.

"You know, I'm actually a big fan of yours."

"Really?" Peach brought her full attention to the toady, feeling guilty for forgetting her rules of conversation etiquette with a 'fan'.

"Died my hair like yours, even!" She lightly laughed with Peach. "I'm honestly surprised you're here with Bowser. I mean, I want him to be happy as much as anyone, but after learning so much about you, I always thought it'd be…oh…I guess a pipe dream of his to accompany you here. I don't mean to be awkward…"

"Oh no, don't worry. I wouldn't have imagined myself here, either." Peach laughed, giggling politely until it faded meaningfully. She looked off towards his shape again, talking with all those who found him amid the uproarious dancing. "But…he's different than I always imagined."

"Oh? How so?"

"There's something sweet…almost kind…but you see, I always saw him as mean, and …coarse, and…just so unrefined."

"He's a little of all of those things," the toady commended, taking a sip of her own punch.

Peach smiled as she nodded. "I only ever saw the Bowser he _wanted _people to see…the one he wanted them to fear. But now he's dear, and so…unsure."

"Unsure?"

Peach nodded again, glancing from the Toady's curious expression back to Bowser's- he had found a partner he was much happier with now. "You'd be surprised!" Peach sipped a bit of punch and kept watching Bowser. She finally added, "I wonder why I never saw it there before…"

Bowser, dancing a whole floor away, looked over his shoulder to catch Peach's staring eye. Suddenly she turned her head to talk to the toady next to her. "What is it, sire?" Kamella, his current partner, asked.

"She glanced this way…" Bowser murmured, excitedly. He looked back over towards her, but her eyes were firmly on the toady's glasses. "I _thought_ I saw…"

"You think she has eyes for you?" Kamella crackled, her slowly aging voice not suited for the lively dancing and loud music.

"Of course!" Bowser grunted, "Who wouldn't?"

"Sire, I have ears within those of your closest counterparts. I know when the princess shudders within your grasp and under your capture and how you feel not as she and she not as thou."

Bowser pouted down at Kamella. "I don't know what that's supposed to even mean. But you should know- when we touched, she _didn't_ shudder at my claw."

Kamella shook her head, her ratty hair going every which way. "It _can't_ be. You should ignore." Bowser glared down at the pessimistic magikoopa, and they both chanced a look at Peach, who had returned to watching the koopa king from afar. "But then…she's never looked at you that way before."

Back at the dessert table, Peach had finally learned the Toady's name. Giselle, who was more than pleased to gossip with the princess about her king, was very willing to help distract her. "So, do you love him?"

"What?" Peach asked, almost spitting a bit of her punch into her cup.

"I'm sorry! I didn't mean…I mean…stupid question, I just…"

"Oh no…don't apologize…there's no such thing as a stupid question when fueled by good intentions. It's just…do you mean _Bowser_?"

"Well, of course! I _know_ you don't love Mario."

Peach laughed a little bit. Such a strange situation, such an odd turn of events! "Oh, I don't?"

"Obviously. I knew I knew a lot about you, but I had no clue I knew more about you than _you_ did. For instance, the way you're looking at His Majesty tonight…you've never once looked at Mario that way. So, do you love Bowser?"

"I…no…of course not…" Peach shook her head a bit, clearing foreign thoughts that had again began to plague it. She tried to look away from Bowser, but his happy side-glances towards her were too irresistible, even in this awkward situation.

"Oh…okay then."

"Hey," Peach suddenly accused, playfully putting her hands on her puffed-up hips. "I thought you were _surprised_ I came with him. And yet you thought we were in love?"

The Toady shrugged, making a hand gesture of nonchalance. "Things change. Feelings, hearts, whatever. I mean, you _must_ have realized you've changed…at least a little."

Peach looked back towards Bowser, smiling as he caught her eye this time. "Yeah…I've noticed. It's like…It's very _new_…a bit alarming, actually. I mean, we're not in love, obviously, but…I'm happy when I'm with Bowser. Who'd have ever thought that that could be?"

Giselle laughed a bit as she nodded. "He's definitely not your usual type."

Peach laughed back. With impeccable timing, Bowser had clearly just stomped on someone's foot as they howled in pain; almost audibly over the music. "True; he's no prince charming. But, there's definitely something about him…something in him that I simply didn't see…"

Giselle looked from Peach, lost in her gaze, to Bowser. Herself, the toady could barely see the koopa king. But from Peach's ever changing expression, she clearly had a perfect view. "Yeah," she agreed, "There's something there that wasn't there before…" Peach hardly even heard Giselle's comment, but it didn't really matter. She wasn't talking about Bowser anyway.

* * *

**Author's Note: **Here's the disclaimer I just know you were all miserable about not having earlier. I do not own any characters except Giselle in this chapter, not even Kamella. Those characters are all the brilliant brain children of Nintendo. In fact, I do not own a few of the words in this chapter...they are lyrics and from(respectively) "I'm not that Girl" from _Wicked_, "The Way you Look Tonight" by Frank Sinatra, "Bubbly" by Coco Callait, and "Something There" from Disney's _The Beauty and the Beast_.

Hope you were okay with the style-switch up. And Happy Birthday, CoH! Thanks for staying with me for two years, or for not screaming and running in horror when you realized it's taken me this long to write twenty-something chapters! I love you all to death. C:

-Razzi


	25. In Sync

**Foreword: **My sincerest apologies for being so inexcusably late with this one! I promised a few of you that I'd have this up 7 days ago at the latest...obviously didn't happen. I was caught up with the musical and whatnot. Finals are my next big time consumer, but then it's summer, so just keep reading! :)

So this chapter is very, very fluffy. On both sides of the stories...its not all just for BxP today. They do get the majority though...very fun to write.

And Disclaimer:All the good characters are property of Nintendo. But I'm honored to borrow them.

* * *

After a night of watching hfim like a hawk, Peach had somehow lost track of Bowser. She frowned, getting up on the balls of her feet to have a better view than her high-heels already provided. "Where's Bowser?" she asked, not even realizing she would get an answer.

"It's almost time for the competition," Giselle answered. The toady had decided to become Peach's personal fungus, realizing tonight might very well be the only time she was with her.

"Well, where did he go? How'd I miss him leaving?" Peach was still searching over the top of heads, but had finally graced a chance to turn around and see Giselle.

"Kamek probably 'escorted' him away to change, so you _wouldn't_ have seen him go. Don't worry; he'll be back soon…"

Peach spun around completely, hissing, "I'm not worried," and yet she turned around immediately. "I just…want to make sure he's okay."

Giselle giggled. "I think Bowser can take care of himself."

Peach blushed, glad her head was turned. Finally, Ludwig's bands ceased their music, and a single percussionist led a roaring drum roll. The magikoopa donned in all black stood at the top of the stairs again, and cleared his throat loudly.

Somehow managing to speak over the drums, he said, "Announcing the arrival of His Highness of all Majesty and ruler over all the Darklands and all of the citizens within, King Bowser Koopa, here presenting himself as the reigning and sole champion of the annual birthday dance competition, hosted by His Highness of all Majesty and ruler over all the Darklands and all of the citizens within, King Bowser Koopa, who shall participate in his competition to be judged by popular accord among with any of his guests who chooses to make their presence known and compete, with the winner being crowned as the champion of the annual birthday dance competition, and shall wear the mighty banner of Champion Birthday Dance Competition Dancer, that title which currently resides with His Highness of all Majesty and ruler over all the Darklands and all of the citizens within, King Bowser Koopa." The magikoopa grinned with pride and extended his hand towards the raised portion of the dance floor.

The audience followed the spotlight as it lit that same spot, the drummer still rolling. Peach suspected he must have gotten a spell to stop him from tiring out, because he didn't stop until there was a loud blast coming from the middle of the platform. Under the spotlight, a rush of purple smoke appeared out of nowhere, and when it dissipated, Bowser stood in the midst.

The crowd cheered at the sight of their king. Bowser grinned back, waving his purple-and-black checkered scepter. He looked simply radiant under the spotlight, a lengthy purple cloak draped over his shell, and a mighty crown that must have weighed over a dozen pounds aloft his head. "Alright," he roared, instantly hushing the crowd. "Who dares compete against the King? Who dares take this crown off my head? Who dares attempt to beat the unbeatable?" The crowd roared in response, likely cheering their king on as opposed to answering the question.

Bowser grinned, lifting his free hand to his eye-level. Suddenly, with more purple smoke, a list rolled right out of his hand and bounced off the floor. Clearly, Kamek was having a blast making his king look good. Bowser read out the names listed on the sheet, laughing at each name, mocking most of them. As each guest who had written their name on the competition sheet was read out, they stood up and withstood the booing as they formed a line along the platform's edge.

Bowser reached the list's end and dramatically lit it on fire. The list burned to a crisp, the ashes blown out to the crowd ceremoniously. "Alright," Bowser said, "Let's hope this is a _real_ competition this year!" More cheers erupted, and Ludwig's band instantly fired up, playing fast paced music unlike any Peach had heard that night. It fit Bowser very well.

The dancers began to dance, five at a time, spinning in the air and ground ridiculously. Their feet moved insanely fast, flips and rolls common. Clearly, a few of the guests had paid the huge ticket bill just for this competition…whether to watch it or compete.

After a minute, a single spotlight fell on the first dancer. The audience cheered, until the spotlight moved to the next dancer. With the light, the dancer sped up his pace, and the audience cheered even louder. They didn't need to be told how to vote for their favorite dancer, and Bowser just paced back and forth between the line along the back wall and the dancers. Behind him was a goomba, a koopa, a mouse, a paratroopa, and a hammer bro; all with clipboards. They wrote furiously as the audience changed volume from dancer to dancer, and after the last dancer had been lit up, the five gripped hands and bowed, jumping off the platform into the crowd. Instantly, the next five took their place.

The pattern went on for almost forty-five minutes, some dancers absolutely amazing with their skills, others not very good at all…Peach, in her dress and all, could probably dance better than a few of them. There were quite a few worms, and even a group of five that worked together in one solid dance routine…might have been cool, but the audience had no clue who to cheer for when the spotlight singled them out.

Ludwig's band picked up the pace and the music as the last five jumped off and Bowser stepped up. He tossed his cloak, scepter, and crown to the side, and roared, enthusing the crowd. Dancing by himself, the spotlight forever following him, Bowser was obviously the best of the evening. He spun on his feet, on his hands, and on all sides of his shell, decorating the dance with back, front, and side flips. Soon, he added the element of fire, and the crowd couldn't have loved it anymore. Arcs of flame proved his path, and smoke circles gave a visual reminder of his spins midair. He danced, his footwork simply unbelievable for his hulking mass, and finally, as the light intensified, the crowd was louder than Ludwig's magically enhanced band could even dream of playing. Bowser's finale was simply indescribable, a blur of color through the fire and the flames.

Finally, he held perfectly still, ceasing at the precise moment of the music. The crowd tried to rush the stage, but purple flashed each time they got too close- a visual warning of the magical force field set in place. Bowser grinned at them all, laughing his signature laugh; Peach was laughing herself, although it wasn't really funny. She suddenly realized that sometime during Bowser's dance she had pushed herself into the middle of the crowd without knowing it…Giselle was still back by the refreshments by herself.

Bowser lifted his claw into the air, silencing the crowd with that strange power he had over them. The goomba, followed by the other cheer-judges, approached the center of the stage. "By the largest majority this competition has seen yet," he bellowed, "we announce the winner of this competition to be, yet again, King Bowser!" The audience cheered, almost as if the crowning came as a surprise to them. The parakoopa topped Bowser's head with the crown, then flew back to tie the cloak back in place. The mouse eagerly handed him the scepter, but Bowser declined.

"There's someone else I'd rather hold right now," he muttered, but those in charge of the lights heard him. Suddenly, the beam was directly over Peach. Ludwig's orchestra played up again, a slow song easing its way through the entire room.

Her heart was fluttering, every eye in the room on her, as everyone tried to see her through the crowd. They parted, forming a perfect path for Peach towards the platform. Bowser put forth his claw and grinned, making Peach's heart beat even louder. She yet again couldn't control her feet, finding them pulling her towards Bowser, although her knees were really too weak to control her.

Suddenly, her hand was happily in Bowser's, and every part of her that Peach had left amid the crowd rushed back into place and she felt whole again. She smiled up at Bowser, and he grinned back. "Nice to have you back," he whispered as they began the slow dance.

Peach had a million responses flooding her mind, but couldn't form her lips around any of them. Finally, she eased out a "yeah", feeling rather inadequate. The audience began to dance themselves, though the spotlight continued to follow Bowser and Peach.

It was absolutely incomprehensible, how fast the mood had changed. Although his crown was still atop his head, it seemed impossible that, just minutes before, Bowser had been dancing faster than humanly possible, leading the now almost silent guests in a deafening crowd. It seemed impossible that, just minutes ago, Peach had only been seeing Bowser because of how fast he was moving, unaware of anyone else in the room. Now, he was slow and steady; and his eyes weren't just a blur- they were far too present, black but full of every color in the world, staring back into Peach's eyes of sapphire.

"Congratulations," she muttered, trying to find words to distract herself from his goofy grin.

"What?...oh, oh thanks."

"I had no idea you could…dance like that."

"Bowser grinned. "I'm pretty incredible, huh? Never lost this thing. Almost always deserve it, too."

Peach raised an eyebrow. "Almost?"

Bowser shrugged, almost picking Peach right off the ground. "Well, once or twice someone's been a bit better. But that hasn't happened for years…by now, no one in their wildest dreams could out-dance me."

Peach laughed, feeling herself drawn to Bowser's warmth. "You're so conceited."

"Only 'cuz I deserve it." Bowser smiled back, warm and kind. After a bit of silence, Peach laughed again, looking away from Bowser's enamored eyes. He watched her head turn, soft and smooth, and couldn't help but touch it.

Instantly, Peach's heart flipped as she felt his curled fingers against her cheek. She turned to look at him, and he pulled her closer with his free hand. "I love you," he told her.

Peach's eyes filled with Bowser's, and her heart continued its gymnastics inside her chest. For just a moment, she thought of Giselle, and felt very silly indeed. There was no place for those feelings she had described…not in Peach's life, no, no…Peach took a hand off from around Bowser's neck and held the claw on her cheek. "I know," she told it, afraid to look into those big, mysterious eyes.

She pulled the claw, ready to thrust it back to her hips, but seemingly unable. Instead, she just pulled it close to her mouth and stood swaying in place to the music, eyes shut as she felt her pulse rush to the place where Bowser's claw sat on the corner of her mouth. She didn't will it any farther, and Bowser, though now awkwardly situated, didn't dare move a muscle. Although his feet kept their dance moving, his heart was the only thing Bowser was aware of, besides Peach.

He closed his eyes and pulled his claw away from Peach's mouth- this was too perilous a situation for it to be there. If he kept it there, feeling her soft lips and her warm-blooded pulse behind them, soon his passion would overwhelm them both. And while _Bowser_ wouldn't argue…he didn't want to risk the precious bond Peach had begun to form. And yet, if his eyes were open, he couldn't stand seeing himself remove himself from her like that…no help from a plumber needed.

Peach opened her eyes slowly, looking back at Bowser's face, and tried to smile. She felt cold, but soon his claw was back on her hip, wrapping itself around her completely. She felt the tiniest pricks of pressure where his filed-down spikes were on the wristbands and clung to that feeling…heaven was here, in these scaly, uncomfortable, but so warm and inviting arms. Although a part of the princess wanted to close her eyes, keep her heaven in mind and not admit with whom she had found it, she couldn't even stand to blink. She needed to see that face…filled with more rapture and love than any expression she had ever seen. Bowser's lips parted, as if to say something, but slowly closed again.

Although they were both silent, they understood exactly what was said behind closed lips. _I know…_ Peach thought. _I really, really know_.

xxxx0o0o0o0o0o0o0xxxx

"Well…here you are." Meredith opened the door to Mario and Luigi's room wide, revealing a 'charming' two-bedder. The room was plain, but still seemed very much like a home. Yet, it seemed a little too small for the two beds…

Meredith caught the look in Luigi's eye and followed it around the room; the two queen beds were absolutely suffocating the bed stand between them, and all the other furniture was against the opposite wall. There was hardly any room at all. "Sorry, guys. We don't really have many family rooms, and the ones we do have are used right now. But now there's starting to be more and more…we're just getting the most out of our rooms as we can before we have to add on to the inn."

"It's-a fine, it's-a fine…" Luigi answered, lugging his green suitcase to the far-most bed. Mario followed suit, taking his to the bed closest. He thanked Meredith, and she left almost immediately to escort Daisy to her private room.

As soon as the door swung shut, Mario hissed, "Mumma Mia, Luigi. Have-a you _seen_ this-a room? It's-a goomba size!"

Luigi nodded furiously. "I know, Mario. I took-a this bed because I didn't-a think you could-a make it over-a here." Mario picked up a round shoe and threw it at Luigi's tall figure, but it missed when he ducked. Luigi laughed, scrambling onto the bed to retrieve Mario's shoe. He tossed it from hand-to-hand looking up at the plain ceiling. "So, what is-a your plan-a?"

Mario was staring down at his suitcase, as undesirous to unpack as Luigi. He shrugged. "I think-a we'll make it up-a as we go along. We don't-a even know who the villain is-a this time. Bowser would-a be too obvious and-a we'd have-a proof already."

Luigi nodded. A sudden chill went through his body…this _was_ a nerve-racking event that Daisy had pulled them into. Who _was_ this villain? How could they be _certain_ he…or she…wasn't really skilled enough to pull this off? Everything in two worlds would fall into his hands; put there by Daisy and his own greediness and desire to have a happy Mario back.

Well, he was certainly happy, that was for sure. But Luigi watched his older brother drum his gloved fingers on his knee, pulled up onto the bed with the rest of his body. Mario seemed lost in thought; possibly about the upcoming battle, but possibly about the approaching week…possibly even about Meredith. He hadn't said anything to Luigi, but he kept checking the clock behind her head the entire time Madame was explaining the situation in the poker room.

Everything was getting to be a bit too much for Luigi. "Do you want-a to see Daisy? I'm-a getting stir-crazy in this-a goomba room." Mario answered the question without even twitching his moustache as he leapt off the bed. Unfortunately, he ended up landing as flat onto the desk across the way as he was on the bed. Luigi laughed, limberly landing onto the floor. Mario clamored off the desk, leading Luigi out the door and down the hallway.

Finding Daisy's room was more than easy. Her door was wide open, her loud and slightly off-key singing heard clear as day. Out of courtesy, Luigi knocked once on the door while Mario stepped right in.

Daisy spun around, her dress spinning in a perfect circle with her motion. As her light curls landed, perfectly framing her face, Luigi felt a bit of a jolt. He always forgot how simply stunning she looked, and every time he saw her it was like love-at-first sight, all over again. He couldn't help but wonder how many mornings, waking up next to that beautiful face; it would take to get rid of the feeling.

"Hey, boys!" Daisy chirped. She was in the middle of her room, seemingly three times larger than the Mario brothers'. And hers only had one bed.

"Daisy, why do you-a have such a…suite? We don't-a even have a big enough-a room for-a one of us."

"Because," she began, walking past them to shut the door, "I'm the one paying. And I tipped extra to get this one."

Mario looked offended. "But-a _we're_ the one-a saving the day!"

Daisy put her hands on her hips, pouting. "Hey, whose to say I can't save it this time? It's no big deal, Mario. I'm sure she'd get you a nicer room if it was a _real_ emer-" Daisy's voice failed, her lips still formed around the vowel. She forced a laugh, turning away before she corrected, "I mean…a real _problem_. Not having a bed and all. Or something."

Mario muttered something about still not feeling like it was fair, and Luigi leapt onto Daisy's bed, grabbing her remote. Their room didn't even have a TV…or if it did, it was probably hidden in their closet, ready to tumble upon the first unsuspecting victim actually thinking there might be spare space in that room.

The three of them sat, mindlessly chatting about the mysterious battle, the week ahead, and the reality TV show they were watching. Finally, Mario mentioned being ready to go to bed; needing his energy for whatever happened the next day. It was a relief…as much as Daisy and Luigi loved his company, they simply couldn't talk about anything important with him. Too many secrets.

Daisy watched him shut the door behind him before turning to Luigi, a mischievous look in her eye. "Guess what, Luigi?"

"What."

"We're in a hotel room, very much alone. Do you know what that _means_, Luigi?"

Luigi instantly felt his face flush and was very uncomfortable. "A-actually…this is an inn-a…D-Daisy."

Daisy lightly kissed the end of Luigi's nose, giggling a bit. "That's even better, y'know." She held his hand in hers and tried to give the same mischievous look as before. Unfortunately, Daisy couldn't mask her amusement at Luigi's face…absolutely red on white in his mesh of bashful fear. Eventually, she just broke into laughter. "Don't worry, Luigi. I'm just kidding."

"Oh. I-a knew that…" he said, wiping the sweat off the back of his neck. "So…anyway-a…what do you think of-a Meredith?"

"I think that it's absolutely insane you both know her. I practically grew up with Madame Clearmont…Meredith was at my house at least once a season. I think I even had a sleepover or two with her…what do _you_ think?"

"I don't-a know. She's-a very nice and-a very lovely, but I'm-a just afraid that-a Mario may fancy-a her a bit-a too much…you know?"

Daisy made a face. "Yeah, I noticed that, a bit…I don't know, Luigi. It's not like its abnormal for a girl to like him, and he usually likes them a bit back. I think we can just wait for it to pass…"

Luigi breathed heavily through his nose, making his moustache whistle ever so slightly. "I know-a, but in the convention, he asked-a me if I-a liked anyone besides-a you."

"What did you tell him?"

Luigi looked into Daisy's eyes as he answered, "That I-a couldn't ever. But-a that it-a is probably different-a with him. No problem."

Daisy smiled sweetly back at Luigi, her gloved hand caressing his. "That's true. I don't think he should try to compare himself and Peach to us." She looked away from Luigi, over his shoulder and out at the happy little town, settling down for bed. "They're more…set to be with each other…y'know? They know how good they are for each other, and so does everyone else. I think if Mario gets interested in one other random girl, it's no big deal. It's not like the husbands who send me valentines get left by their wives or something…its not like they're in _love_ with me. I think, as long as Mario and Peach love each other there shouldn't be a problem."

"Yeah…" Luigi answered lamely. After a short bit of talking, he began to feel the stress of the day creeping up on him. "Daisy, I'm-a going to-a go now. Don't want to keep-a Mario waiting."

Daisy smiled and nodded, watching Luigi get up. He took a step towards the door and stopped. With everything going on, the stress with this villain situation, Mario's confusing attitudes, and everything else, he knew he was doing to miss the stability of Daisy's presence. Even when she was almost frightening, he loved her…and he was going to miss her even for the hours he was sleeping.

Luigi turned around, facing Daisy as she sat on her bed, waiting for her boyfriend to leave. Daisy raised an eyebrow. "Luigi, what is i-"

Luigi grabbed Daisy's face, cutting her off and pressed his lips to hers. His lips sweetly caressed hers until she broke apart with laughing. His mustache, quivering under Luigi's delight at one of their few kisses, was too ticklish for Daisy to be used to.

She pulled away and looked at him, the mischievous look back in her eyes and smile. "Come here, you." She swung her arms around Luigi's neck and pulled him down to her height, sitting on the bed. Daisy kissed him, Luigi reciprocating willingly for a good ten, fifteen seconds.

"I love you, Daisy," he whispered.

"I love you too, Luigi," she whispered back, giggling before she let go. "G'night."

Luigi smiled and waved, walking backwards as they continuously wished each other good night. Luigi ended up hitting the doorframe full on, and quickly turned the right way to get back to his room. The last thing he heard from Daisy was her laughter.

xxxx0o0o0o0o0o0o0xxxx

Bowser had gone silent for a bit again, looking past Peach. He kept his warm claws around her hips, but she wasn't pressed to him at all…that way he could still see her eyes. Even when he wasn't looking, like now.

Peach searched his face, seeing as it was the only thing that interested her just then. She noticed the minutest of changes as his lips raised in a tiny smile. Her heart thumped, and she giddily asked, "What are you thinking about?"

Bowser looked back into her eyes and smiled warmly. "Three summers ago, when I took you to my ice castle. Do you remember?"

Peach bit the inside of her cheek, thinking. "No… not exactly…what was so funny?"

"Oh," he began, "I decided to take you _there_ specifically because it was so dang hot that year. I figured I must have been the smartest koopa around, kidnapping you to get away from that scorching drought to a castle made completely of ice. When I got to your room, you were telling a toad to get you more ice water, so I thought it was the perfect chance. You looked so hot…and pretty dang warm, too."

Peach laughed, but looked up silently for the rest of the story. "You were complaining that it was _too hot_ to be kidnapped when I took you…but the moment we got there you started telling me it was _too cold_. At first it was funny and I was just glad to have you there, but it got annoying pretty fast. I had tried so hard to choose the best place to make you the happiest, and you didn't care at all. So I got really angry and said if you didn't like ice, fine, I would melt it. So I started breathing fire all over the place, and almost melted all the ice sculptures in the front hall-"

"Then I shouted for you to stop…" Peach added, remembering the story now. Mentally, she skipped ahead and giggled, realizing why Bowser had liked this story so much.

After raising a bushy red eyebrow, Bowser prompted, "would you like to finish the story, or can I, missy?"

"Go ahead,"

"Thank you," Bowser said, through his grin. "_Anyway_. I stopped, and you told me the sculptures were very pretty and would I please not breathe fire again while you were there. I agreed, and you asked if you could go home, too. Obviously I wasn't going to cart you back home after making such an ordeal out of bringing you there, so I just showed you to your room to stay cool until the Mario Brothers tried to wreck everything.

"Within two hours, you had wandered down to the kitchen, looking for hot cocoa. I lied and told you-"

"You lied? You mean I _could_ have drank it in my room?" Peach gasped.

"If I let you go back to your room, how were you supposed to cuddle with me?" Peach's face flushed, and thoroughly pleased, Bowser continued. Sure, Peach knew the story, but it still made him proud to tell it. So tell it he would. "You sat on the couch with me…since that was the only furniture in the kitchen not made of ice. After a few minutes, you had fallen asleep next to me, since I was so warm and everything else was so cold. You just sat there, for practically an hour, absorbing my heat and _smiling_." Bowser smiled too, a warm, far-away smile, as if trying to keep the memory in tact.

Peach smiled back, but her smile faded as she remembered what happened next. "And then…"

Sighing, Bowser continued, "And then you woke up. Yelled at me for 'tricking' you, even though all I did was not wake you up. The Mario brothers came the next day…I would have creamed them, but they were using fire balls in an ice castle, and I promised not to breathe fire, so it was kind of a stupid fight."

Peach looked back at Bowser. "You didn't breathe fire because I told you not to? I thought you were just…you just forgot or something."

Bowser looked hard down at Peach. "Right. I totally forgot about the one reason I had stayed warm the entire time and why my throat hurt from keeping all that dang fire in it." Bowser chuckled. "Still, though…I liked that summer."

Peach smiled, seeing Bowser look distant. It made her so happy, that simply remembering a memory long by gone of innocent snuggling would make him so happy even now. She loved seeing how much he loved her…it was so obvious, and so wonderful.

She pulled herself in closer, letting her elbows hang down. Peach pulled her tiara-less head under Bowser's chin and absorbed his warmth, feeling it spread through herself completely. Peach's heart was beating faster than imaginable, but with her face pressed against Bowser's chest, she realized his was beating just as fast. In fact, they were beating in hurried rhythm.

Bowser gasped just slightly, surprised by Peach's sudden movements. But his fingers quickly found each other as they wrapped around Peach's back, and he tried to ignore his pounding heart. She smelt so sweet, she looked so…happy. Resting in embrace, they both continued to move to the music.

The cologne Wendy had gotten for her father reached Peach's nose in this close vicinity. Of course, she didn't know that's what it was, but Peach inhaled all she could of the sweet smell. The scent seemed to include everything wonderful about Bowser…the smoky scent just tangible through the natural scent of heat and the sweet smell of piranha plants. She closed her eyes, remembering the story Bowser had just reminded her of and the warmth she didn't recognize back then as Bowser's personal warmth. The warmth of happiness and love that Bowser radiated only for her.

He loved her _so_ much.

She _needed_ that so much.

They continued to spin in rhythm, and though Bowser's heart never really slowed down, Peach's settled into a state of contentment.

Yes…this was her home, her personal heaven, whether or not her heart knew it as well as her head.

* * *

**Author's Note: **We're almost half way through the ball, and we should get there next chapter. I'm on the fifth page of chapter 26 and we're not there yet, but I still fully believe that the ball should be done by...chapter 30? Maybe? Probably.

But did you like this segment? Even though it was horrendously late and lack of plot-y?

Thanks for those who didn't abandon my baby (toddler) while I was off musical-ing. I love you all to death! Razzi

PS-I'm also betaing a lovely story by ZADrookie with nice, long chapters. I've realized for the first time how truly dedicated you all are to read my long chapters in single sittings. XD It's taking me awhile to get through, but once it gets posted, you all must read it. Lovely story


	26. Presense

**Foreword-** I honestly don't know why this one took so long. One part was that I spent all of last weekend through today fiddling with this chapter and next, taking things out, adding things in, and I'm still not satisfied with either. I think you guys and all your expectations are making me crack. XD Don't worry, a lot of this is my own personal expectations, one of which is disappointed that we're still not even half way done with the ball.

This one is pretty interesting. I like it because we dabble with stuff I haven't really touched for awhile in this story, even though that means you have to look a bit harder for the fluff. Still, I hope you enjoy it.

Disclaimer gets a fun little breather today- I own "Bell" (which is actually not a horrible pun on 'Belle', it was a bit of an accident as I named her rather late at night and still liked it when I was awake the next day), but all the other characters are the property of those at Nintendo.

* * *

A tall, slender dragon-like koopa with billowing blue hair sat down next to Wendy. The koopaling was sitting with her chin in both claws, looking out with googly-eyes towards Peach and Bowser. She didn't even notice the koopa sit down.

"Are you watching your daddy?"

Wendy screamed and flailed wildly in surprise. Quickly, she composed herself. No one seemed to notice except for the koopa woman who had posed the startling question. "Yeesh! Like, don't creep up on me like that, Auntie Bell. You totally scared me!"

"I noticed, sugar," she sweetly said. "So, is this the famous Peach, then?"

"Yeah. She's _tooootally_ falling for King dad…and it's all my doing."

"Really? You're the little cupid that put them together, eh, sugar?"

Wendy looked at her nails admiringly. "Mmhmm. Me and nobody else."

"Not even them? They didn't come together on their own at _all_?"

Wendy rolled her eyes. "Well, I'm sure they did _a little_, but I did all the hard work."

"Like what?"

"Like…" Wendy's eye twitched. "Like…er….like…well, examples don't matter. Like, why do you care anyway?"

"I hafta keep an eye on my brother, that's all," she winked. She and Wendy returned to watching them dance, and Peach pulled away to say something. Bowser nodded, and began to escort her to the table of refreshments. "Perfect," Bell whispered, gathering herself up to leave.

"Auntie Bell, like where are _you_ going? We've got a totally killer view already, you like don't need to change a thing."

"Er…just going to say hello, that's all, sugar."

"Y'know, I don't really think that's like a good idea. King Dad is…" but Bell was already half way across the ballroom.

Bell swept her hair dramatically, rushing as fast as her slender dragon-koopa legs allowed. She reached Peach and Bowser, and as Peach put out her hand to accept the drink Bowser poured for her, Bell stuck her claw right in.

Bell grinned, her stunning white teeth a little frightening. "Lovely to meet you, Princess Peach. I'm Bell Koopa, sister of this handsome little king."

Bowser's mane stood on edge as he heard Bell's voice. He spun around and glared at his sister. "Bell, what are you _doing_ here?"

Peach looked lightly at Bowser, ignoring his glare. "Bowser, you didn't tell me you had a sister!" She turned back to look at Bell and smiled sweetly. "It's my pleasure, Miss Koopa."

"Oh," Bell laughed, ignoring Bowser as well. Her right claw was still in Peach's hand, and she waved her free hand in front of Peach, showing off a dazzling rock of a ring. "It's Mrs. Koopa. Lenny and I decided to keep _my_ name." She laughed again. Her laugh was exactly what you would expect it to be from her name; light, like a bell, and very unlike Bowser's.

"Bell," Bowser growled, "What are you-"

Bell pulled her hand out of Peach's and turned to Bowser. "My goodness, I never told you about my marriage, did I? Oh, he's just lovely, Bowser. It was all very sudden, actually. I met him at a work gathering and three months later we were in Los Vegos, being married by…well, actually, by a Bowser-impersonator, as ironic as that is." She laughed again, pressing forward to give Bowser no chance of interrupting. "So, even though you didn't even know your sweet little sister was getting married, 'you' were the one marrying us!"

"Bell, why are you here?"

Bell's laugh died; she looked from Bowser, frustrated and impatient, to Peach, curious and innocent. "Can't you let your own sister celebrate your birthday, Bowser?"

"If that was the only reason you were here, sure. But you haven't come to something like this without a real reason as long as I've known you. If you were _me_, that'd make sense. But you're just an annoying little woman who tries to pretend being my sister makes up for being a jerk."

"Bowser…" Peach muttered, looking over at him. But his eyes were focused completely on his sister, who was now fidgeting in place, although her white smile stayed firm.

The staring match continued for a bit until finally, Bell cracked. She put her fingers up to her forehead and began to rub. Her eyes were shut, exposing the spackled on layers of eyeshadow. "Okay, so I didn't _just_ come to say 'Happy Birthday'. Lenny works for a tabloid stationed in the western half of Yurkoopakia, and I told him I could use my connections to find something out. Is that really that bad? That I'm trying to make my brother _and_ husband happy at the same time?"

"Has Lenny seen your ring collection?" Bowser growled. Bell tried to interrupt, but he continued. "Would he be using you to his financial benefits if he knew that's all you're using _him_ for? Do you really think that one little errand for this guy is going to cover you for the rest of your time with him? Or is that your exact plan- get close enough at the start to earn your keep, then disappoint him all out until he's the one filing divorce?"

"Lenny's different, okay?" Bell huffed. "He's not even that well-off…"

"Right, he's just got more power than anyone else in this country who isn't a politician or me. And how is he any different than your past…what is it…twenty husbands?"

"Seventeen, Bowser," Bell hissed, "He's only the seventeenth."

Bowser scoffed. "I'm a little surprised you can still count them all, actually. Or do you keep a checklist by your bed? Trying to make it to twenty before you stick with one long enough to have kids?"

Peach looked around, noticing four or five eaves-droppers. Everyone else seemed too engulfed in their own business to notice the koopa king's tantrum. Or maybe they were just used to it.

Bell glared at Bowser. "Well, gee. I'm sorry. I didn't realize that having children made up for a bad relationship with your spouse. But I guess that explains why you have _eight_ of them."

Sparks were flicking out of Bowser's mouth as he roared, "What are you trying to say?"

Bell put her manicured hands on her hips, tapping her tail in anger. "I don't know, Bowser. Maybe you could tell me, since you_ apparently_ know everything about me. Well, you know what? You don't. You don't know _anything_ about me, because you never cared. And you can't tell me I don't know what love is, Bowser, because I've lived my whole life looking for it. And what have you done? Nothing. _You're_ the one who doesn't know what love is…you'll never understand it; not with Clawdia, not with your trophy human, not with _anyone_."

Bell's words hit Peach hard. This entire week, Bowser had shown her nothing but love, and for the first time, she had realized what being loved truly felt like. No one in their right mind could say that Bowser didn't know how to love…he may not have been as understanding about how to show it, but he had more of it in him than anyone Peach had ever met. And besides, Peach was _not_ a 'trophy human'.

As Bowser's mouth flew open to retort, Peach's foot beat him to the impact. With lightning reflexes, she brought her heel down fast and hard on Bell's scaly foot. Peach's blue eyes burned like fire and she watched, emotionless, as Bell shrieked. Now, almost every eye in the ballroom was watching the row, as Bell hopped on one foot, hooting in pain, with Bowser staring down in awe at Peach, still shaking in anger.

Peach opened her mouth to talk, but no cohesive words came to her mind. Just outrage and disbelief. She turned on her heels towards Bowser and forcefully offered her elbow. Bowser grinned down at Peach and took it, reeling her away from Bell and towards a secluded table. He looked around at all the staring eyes, all surprised to see Peach's violent side…especially as it was sticking _up_ for Bowser. Sure, they'd heard of her violent streaks, but since she never used them against her captor, they never believed in them. All Bowser did was smile, almost like he was proud of Peach.

Bowser sat down across from Peach, his eyes glowing in admiration.

Peach closed her eyes and took a deep breath. "I'm sorry about that…I'll have to apologize to your sister later. I just…sometimes people…I'm sorry."

Bowser reached across the table and gripped Peach's hand. "Don't apologize. That was the highlight of my birthday." Bowser grinned. "Actually, the whole day's been great. I love you _so_ much."

"I know…that's why Bell annoyed me so much, I guess. Knowing you love me seems as obvious as knowing the sun rises everyday…but I guess vampires like to be in denial, don't they?" Bowser's eyes glazed over for a second. Peach raised an eyebrow, realizing he didn't get it. "You know…because vampires can't stand the sun…so they would probably prefer it not to rise. Just like Bell doesn't understand-" Peach trailed away, seeing Bowser was still confused, and now just satisfied watching Peach talk. "Never mind."

Bowser smiled again. "Do you know what you did to Bell is what I've wanted to do since she turned three? Actually…I've probably done that a bunch already, but still. She's been an idiot for her entire life. I guess all the stupid genes that I'm missing have to go somewhere, right?"

Peach giggled and nodded. "Of course, Bowser. Whatever you say." She looked over his shoulder and noticed Bell, chattering away with someone. She was rubbing her aching foot against her leg, but seemed to be retelling the commotion's story in a way that put her in a good light with the famous King and Princess.

"Did you know she missed our parents' funeral for a wedding? And its not like it was planned or something…she met the guy at the hospital they were admitted to. I think they must have a hotel room reserved just for her in Los Vegos."

Peach frowned. "Why would someone do that?"

Bowser shrugged. "Sometimes, I wished they were dead and I was off marrying you while they were being put in the ground forever. But that's just not the same."

"Actually, it sort of is, Bowser."

"No, no, nothing's the same for me." Bowser laughed. Then he grew quiet and serious. "I'd want Mom and Dad to go to our wedding anyway. See how happy you make me…how happy I want to make you. How wrong they were about the two of us, how happy we could be…" He looked at Peach with his dark, soulful eyes, and was happy to see hers smiling back. He cleared his throat a bit and continued.

"Bell only ever invited anyone to her first wedding, and since then even the tabloids haven't been able to keep up with her. I'm sure her sweet 'Lenny' or whatever his name is will have a heck of a time making an anti-Bell article after she divorces him."

"Bowser, how can you be so sure she's set on divorcing him?"

"Because she's been the same koopa her entire life. People don't change."

Peach felt stung by Bowser's snarling remark. She looked away from his eyes, unable to face those who she herself had imagined so much change in. "I think they do," she muttered. Suddenly, all her fire was extinguished. That which she had fought so hard for was…an imagination?

Bowser gulped, upset at himself for upsetting Peach. She picked at the table cloth, clearly trying to think of something so say. Why was she so upset, though? Because he had said people don't change? Had she perhaps hoped that they did…maybe that he had changed…? "Well," he muttered in response, "I guess sometimes they do. If they have a good enough reason."

Peach looked back at Bowser. "If I believed people didn't change…I couldn't let myself even be here right now."

"What's that supposed to mean?"

Peach looked hard at Bowser, but laughed a bit as she realized what she meant. "I feel like _you've _changed since I knew you…before this week. You seem…better. If I didn't believe that was possible, I wouldn't be here. I wouldn't go to a ball on the arm of someone I consider evil, now would I?"

Bowser's heart flipped, and he almost jumped out of his seat in joy. Peach had really, truly seen a change in him that she liked! That opened so many doors for him…he wasn't just imagining affection anymore…she was sitting right there, grinning at him, telling him that she trusted him. Closest thing to love he could ask, probably.

Although still high from Peach's chipper remark, Bowser put his elbow firmly on the table, leaning across to say to Peach, "Y'know, I'm still evil. I'll always be the most evil thing around, no matter how much I change. Taking the evil out of me is like taking the beauty out of you- stupid and impossible."

Peach giggled. "Do you realize that you manage to…" Peach's tongue swelled, preventing whatever word was going to come out. Quickly, she changed words to one that fit the situation much better, in her opinion. "You manage to flatter me even when you're just trying to flatter yourself?"

Bowser chortled. "I guess I do." He put his other elbow on the table and his face into his hands. "Can't really help it, Peach. You're too easy to praise and too hard to ignore."

xxxx0o0o0o0o0o0o0xxxx

Kammy looked up at the giant clock situated on the balcony in front of Ludwig's orchestra. Bowser's jaws held the brilliant timepiece in place, reading to Kammy that it was time to gather the koopalings. She frowned, knowing her responsibilities, but all the more willing to shirk them completely. After all, everyone here was dancing, laughing, talking, enjoying themselves. And Kammy, one of the most important people in the entire empire, got to be spending her holiday rounding up those annoying little monsters.

She turned on her heel towards a corner where Roy was just barely visible when her neck tingled. That keen sixth sense she had towards Bowser Junior kicked in as she spun again, her hand out and catching the youngest koopaling by the shell. "Where are you off to?"

Junior cringed, and quickly tried to fabricate a lie. He thrust his claw over in towards the kitchen and said, "going to get veggables." Kammy looked down at the grinning koopaling and raised an eyebrow. Junior frowned. "Yeah, that was a pretty stupid lie, wasn't it? Okay, I'm _really_ going to…to get…cookies. Lots of cookies."

"In the kitchen? When we're in the middle of dessert buffet and all the cookies you could ever want are right here, where you're _supposed_ to be?"

Junior grinned up at Kammy. "Mean, huh? I just _love_ being-"

Kammy put her wand up to Junior's throat, cutting his voice off mid sentence. She smirked. "Anti-lie spell. You can't say anything but the truth, Junior. Now, where are you going?"

Junior licked his lips and smacked them shut. He watched with satisfaction as Kammy's eyes twitched. "I'm not Morton," he said, "I know how to work the silent treatment."

"Fine!" Kammy snapped, "Don't tell me! But you can't go wherever you were headed anyway…time to get in line for the end of the first half."

"That's not faaaaair!" Junior shrieked, "Mama Peach and Papa don't have to do thaaaaaat yeeeeeet!"

"It's completely fair," Kammy sneered, magically gluing Junior in place on the floor. She spun on her heel towards Roy. She quickly flipped back around, catching Junior as he puffed up his chest to release the worst scream yet. She pointed a wrinkled finger at him condescendingly. "Don't…even…think about it…" Kammy hissed.

Junior's chest was still puffed, his eyes as wide as koopa-coins. Satisfied, the magikoopa turned back to Roy's corner, thrilled to see that both Lemmy and Larry were with him; Larry crossing his arms and snarling something or other, Lemmy staring off into the various murals across the walls.

Kammy put a hand on Lemmy and Larry's shoulders, making them both jump. Roy's face hardened as she looked down on him and he grumbled to Larry, "Dis ain't ovah." Kammy disregarded the ominous remark and smeared a fake smile across her face.

"Boys, time to get in line for the end of the first half." Roy, surprisingly, nodded and was more than pleased to find his place in line. Just simply shaking hands goodbye with his various 'colleagues' was an impression worth making. Kammy smiled, glad she had at least one koopaling that wasn't going to skin her alive tonight. She wheeled the other two boys around, her hand still firmly on their shoulders.

Perhaps unnecessarily, she magically glued all three in their age-order place to match Junior's grumpy but stable position. Wendy was almost as easy to find, eagerly talking with an attractive koopa from a distant city. Wendy pulled with all her might against Kammy's grip and magic, determined to finish flirting with the koopa, his accent dripping through every word of flattery. Finally satisfied when he handed her a napkin with his number, Wendy accepted the magic's pull.

Just like letting go during tug-of-war, Kammy found her wand arm flailing madly after Wendy as she zoomed into place. Kammy face-planted right in front of the five koopalings; six, now that Morton had wandered over in curiosity. Junior, Larry, and Lemmy exploded into fits of laughter, Wendy giggling far quieter, but almost as obnoxiously. Morton buffah-ed, equally amused with Kammy's accidental bit of slapstick. She slowly lifted herself back up, cracking her back in a few places, her blood boiling. If these kids weren't Bowser's own blood and his pride and joys, she would get exact revenge. But so many years and so much pain would probably kill them all.

Kammy spun around, ceasing the laughter instantaneously. Morton looked like he was going to taunt something, but seemed to choke on his words. Kammy was just too intimidating when she was angry.

Apparently, she sent of waves of anger, as Iggy was quick to sneak into place. Although he had tried to move inconspicuously, his rainbow Mohawk was hard to miss. "Iggy," she snarled. He looked up, swallowed a lump in his throat, and adjusted his glasses in reply. "Thank you for joining us. Get in line." Kammy watched with an icy glare as Iggy adjusted himself to stand between his older and younger siblings.

Sometimes, Kammy could be even more frightening than the koopalings' father. Usually it was because of something stupid and mean they'd done directly to her, but occasionally, like today, it was no one's fault in particular. Probably the only person to blame for Kammy's sour mood was Peach…and no one would dare blame her.

xxxx0o0o0o0o0o0o0xxxx

His eyes had several circles under them by now, but Toadsworth was determined to keep them on the television. Just a few hours before he had told a reporter away, assuring him that Princess Peach was on a private vacation. He immediately regretted it.

Since that reporter left, more than happy with the scoop he had accidently been given, no less than five other news stations and companies had shown up at the castle doors. Where was Peach? Why was her vacation private? Where was Mario? Who was protecting her? Did this have to do with Bowser? Is this a cover-up? What was going on?

Time after time, Toadsworth had turned them away, often with physical assistance. But even as he assured them that Peach was just taking a break and explaining any more would be taking away her own goals of privacy, Toadsworth prayed he knew the real answers.

So far, the television hadn't mentioned Peach once. Okay, that was a lie…every fifth commercial mentioned something that Peach 'approved', including a few things Toadsworth personally knew she despised. But nothing that mattered was ever mentioned. That was good- the castle didn't need anymore stress of covering up Peach's 'vacation' than they already had. Of course, if someone knew something about Peach, it would be nice.

Toadsworth changed the channel again, listening to the clock tick over the musical tones on the television. After watching the screen flashing for hours on end, listening for any new news at all and at the same time dreaming against it, the clock was his little piece of sanity. That, at least, was never going to change.

xxxx0o0o0o0o0o0o0xxxx

The room was covered in daises.

Pristine, beautiful, white daisies.

A wind blew through the room, stirring up the daisies as well as her yellow dress, spinning the flowers in the air like fairies, dancing in the night air.

Music seeped through the flowers, sounding old and distant, like some kind of movie. The scene itself had a strange cold warmth, familiar foreignism, and a distant closeness.

The daisies continued to spin and stir in the air as she walked through them, moving towards the blurred room. Colors and shapes of unintelligible nature were not too far, but still too far for her to make out.

As she moved, the daisies flew faster and faster, blocking her view as they flew higher and higher. Until finally, the daisies hovered in place, forming amongst themselves a curtain. Her view was completely blocked…nothing but white, perfect daisies.

She stretched out a hand and, with her lace-cuff glove, pushed the curtain aside.

Music flooded her ears as the scene was suddenly more real than the daisies ever were. Daisy felt the warmth radiating all around her in this giant dance-hall, murals and pillars lining the circular chamber.

Koopas, goombas, penguins, ravens, and every other creature imaginable filled the room, adding their own unique voices to the music that echoed off every stone wall. Daisy looked around, trying to make sense of the occasion, and felt a hand on her shoulder.

Two bright, happy blue eyes stared into Daisy's. Peach smiled and hugged her cousin, pulling back and letting her blonde hair frame her face perfectly. "Daisy, I haven't seen you all night!"

"Oh Peach, I've missed you so much!" Daisy looked at her cousin, absolutely radiant in all her happiness. "Your dress is absolutely stunning!" It was true- after Peach's natural bliss and radiance, her dress was just as stunning. Jewels and shimmering diamonds were sewn right into Peach's fine pink fabric, gold and silver threads making it shine as bright as her eyes. The layers and bunchings were done in perfect skill and precision, yet the dress seemed to flow as naturally as water on Peach's body.

Peach's silken pale-pink gloves seemed to be alien in Daisy's normally impressive gloves. Her smile was full and pure as she said, "I'm just glad you came. I'm sure our guest of honor will be happy, too!"

Daisy smiled, it was hard not too, with Peach's expression, but asked, "Who?" Peach just laughed, as if the question was really a joke. "Where are we, anyway?"

Peach giggled, ready to reply with what she thought was an appropriate titter back, but her words were caught in her throat as she caught sight of something in the distance. Daisy quickly flipped her head around, looking to see what caught Peach's eye, and saw Bowser off in the distance, talking to someone else. He, luckily, hadn't seen Peach yet. "Peach," she muttered, "we've got to get you out of here, before-"

Daisy spun her head back to Peach, but her face lacked the terror Daisy expected. Instead, it was even more radiant than it ever was. Her mouth was inexplicitly trying to stop itself from grinning like a fool, and her eyes were alight with a glow Daisy had never seen in Peach's always bright blue eyes. "There he is!" she whispered, squeezing Daisy's hands a little harder. "He's finally back!"

Daisy turned back to make sure they were both looking at the same koopa king, and saw Bowser approaching. Daisy looked back at Peach, her mouth forming a questioning 'o', and then back to Bowser when she saw it had never changed.

"I'm…I'm gonna go now, Daisy. See you soon!" Without another word, Princess Peach pulled her hands out of Daisy's, grabbed her skirt, and took off running _toward_ Bowser. Daisy watched curiously and utterly confused, as Bowser turned to see Peach and lit up like a Christmas tree. He put his arms out and Peach rushed right into them, tossing her arms about his neck and squeezing tight. She pulled back and said something, still happy and smiling, and Bowser laughed. He looked towards Daisy, grinned, and waved.

The "o" on Daisy's face from her confusion seemed to be permanent and she waved back. Bowser looked back at Peach, his dark eyes glowing as they stared into her crystalline ones, and said something. She nodded, grabbed his claw and let him lead her out to the dance floor. Then, the alien and bizarre course of events continued as they began to slow dance, Peach enthralled in whatever Bowser was saying, one hand on his shoulder and the other in his claw.

Daisy pushed her way through the crowd to watch Peach and Bowser closer, dancing as seemingly one person. Peach was so happy, she seemed to glow. Bowser was absolutely ecstatic, and looked completely willing to kiss Peach at any given moment. Daisy continued to push through the crowd, but she seemed to make no progress at all.

As she pushed, more people seemed to appear between herself and the dancing couple, keeping them perpetually distant. Slowly, the people behind her disappeared into daisies, swelling and filling the empty space between all the couples.

Less and less couples separated Daisy from Bowser and Peach, but more and more daisies took their place.

The daises formed piles and curtains. Mountains of daisies,

Pristine, beautiful, white Daisies,

until finally, Daisy was lost over her head in daisies.

She thrashed about; yelling for Peach and even Bowser, but no one seemed to hear her.

The sound was muffled, the visual was gone, and she saw nothing.

Nothing but daisies.

She shut her eyes tightly, and when she opened them, there were no daisies to be seen. The room was completely dark. And she was safe in her hotel bed.

After finally catching her breath, Daisy looked around. She faintly made out the sound of cars on the highway nearby and the light laughter and music from the main room of the inn. And there wasn't a single daisy anywhere nearby.

* * *

**Author's Note: **As an author whose been planning this story/ball for far too long, I'm already tired of the ball. So I assume you guys are too. I tried to speed it up next chapter but ended up failing, so we'll see how long it takes. But the chapter itself is fun so far, so that's always good. It even gets a bit T (as I rated the story long ago), but don't get your hopes too high- trust me. ;)

I'm thrilled with all the readers who've stuck it through as well as the beautiful people who found CoH recently. And I have something in plan because you guys are getting me up to half a G of reviews, and that's CRAZY. I'd tell you how crazy but I have to leave now and wanted you to have this by tonight, so trust me- its crazy.

-Razzi


	27. Life in all angles

**Foreword: **Even though I know I'm late...I don't feel like I am. I'm sorry about that, because I really am like super late. But I'm on schedule again (just finished 28, wootwoot) so even with school starting fairly soon, updates should be better. AND we're almost done with the ball, so I won't have to worry about tailoring it to my over-hyped and disappointed expectations so much!

Oh, and if the beginning segment with the penguins drags, I'm sorry. I cut and snipped and edited until all I left is what seems absolutely necessary. Still seems long to me, but I actually left out some stuff with them I would have liked to play with more. And I had to add Daisy's scene because I promised a bunch of people I'd explain her odd dream this chapter, then realized "oh crap she's not awake! She can't explain!" so, just to warn you, I'm sorry if a sleep-deprived Luigi comes to hunt you in the night ;)

Now, Disclaimer! Those silly penguins are the sorry brain children of myself, but all the good characters are property of the braniacs at Nintendo, across the sea!

* * *

As one of the richest, most celebrated, and most purple penguins in the Darklands, Jane Frosten was very much at home at the ball. "Dear Miss Icegerald, this has been a lovely evening, hasn't it?"

Miss Icegerald, a penguin not quite as purple but far more wealthy than Miss Frosten, nodded her head along with her bouncing pearls. "Just lovely. It's sad our stay is over…they're already playing the First Last Dance."

"Mmhmm….we'll have to see if we can attend next year."

"Oh Jane, be serious! Next year Scott and I'll still be beak-deep in debt from these tickets!"

"Ah, yes, I had forgotten about that little detail called money…perhaps in three years or so? Maybe by then, Her Highness will be attending as more than a guest?"

Miss Icegerald turned in her seat and stared over at the elegant royals, spinning through the dancehall, their flirting as light as their dancesteps. "You think so, Jane? Oh, wouldn't that be ace…but would Princess Peach really be ready to move on that soon?"

"Perhaps you aren't up on all the latest gossip, m'dear," Miss Frosten muttered, and instantly had Miss Icegerald leaning in closer, "but she's in higher spirits around His Horribleness than she's ever been. And just at the beginning of this week, she wasn't even willing to look him in the eye."

"Well, isn't that why three years seems a bit quick?"

"Not at all! Why, just look at her, Zelda!" Jane waved a wing in their direction and sighed. Peach twirled in the air as Bowser lifted her, throwing her shining blonde hair back and laughing. "I'm sure you've seen pictures and videos and what-not of her with Mario. She's so…she always seems as uncomfortable as a sardine. Honestly," she laughed, "I don't blame her. Can you imagine being set up and expected to _marry_ that fat, old, mustachioed man? If your Scott looked anything like Mario, I'd have stopped you at the church gates."

"Looks aren't everything, Jane. You're no stick either, y'know. But I do see your point…she seems so happy tonight. And that's to say nothing about Bowser! I've never even imagined him this happy in my life!"

Jane placed her wings on her laps and sighed happily. "I wish them the best. I do think I'd cry if they aren't happily married by the time we're here again."

"It's a good thing His Majesty already has those little terrors of his," Zelda added, waving her wing toward the line of koopalings magically glued in place, "because I'm pretty sure Peach couldn't get him anything."

Jane put her elbow on the table and playfully added, "Not that His Highness won't try." The girls twittered with laughter. In silence, they returned to watching the elegant couples waltzing through the last dance. Finally, the orchestra played the last chord.

Ludwig, just barely visible from the third story up, bowed graciously and left sight as he began the descent to join his siblings. The first violinist, Gregory, began to conduct slow background music for the guests to listen to as they were ushered out.

Jane Frosten sighed and stood herself up. "Well, Miss Icegerald, shall we be going then?"

"Yeah, we probably should." She stood up and brushed her feathers down, finishing off her koopa wine before leaving the glass on the table. Wing-in-wing, Jane and Zelda waddled over towards the large oaken doors, eager to get a spot in line before it was too long. The wait already seemed like it would be another twenty minutes before they left.

After waiting in line for several minutes, a gentlemanly whomp let the ladies past him in line; he had recognized Jane from her romance novels' pictures. and they were both pleased to move closer, regardless of Zelda's bout of jealousy of the whomp completely ignoring her and her husband's existence and success.

Once they reached the oldest of the koopalings, Zelda thrust her wing into his claw. "_Beautiful_ music, sire, truly beautiful. I almost teared up in that third ballad you played; the retrograde was a stunning addition. And the Scherzo piece was so much fun…I've heard it preformed before, but never like that. I don't dance, but I just had to get out of my seat for that one. You move your orchestra beautifully and I have no doubt less than half of the beauty was their own talent's fault. You do magic with that baton and quill, sire, you truly do."

Ludwig bowed his head, smiling sincerely. "Well, thank you, Madame. I trust you are not simply trying to impress me as some anathema here might; you seem to speak with perfect probity and I thank you."

Zelda beamed. She opened her beak to say more, but Jane pushed her out of the way and giggled, thrusting her wing firmly into Ludwig's wing. "I have to admit, sire, I'm a bit of a fangirl of yours, and I just _ado…_I mean I _venerated _such _canorous_ music. And to meet you is simply _prodigious_."

Ludwig's smile faded as he looked deeply into Zelda's eyes. He interrupted her quickly. "You might practice your vocabulary before you attempt to actuate it. It could be presumed you procured a thesaurus and memorized 'the pretty words' to inveigle my attention. And as flattered as I am to have yet another epigone, I hope you do not embarrass yourself like this in front of all your betters."

Zelda's purple face had bleached itself, and Zelda, although still in the middle of introducing herself to a very distracted Lemmy, tried to explain her friend to Ludwig. "This is Jane Frosten, Prince Ludwig…words _are_ her craft."

Ludwig nodded in understanding. "Even authors are fallible…you do not yet have the aplomb of one comfortable with one's words, Miss Frosten, and I do believe it would be beatific to remember that sometimes vocabulary pendency is supererogatory. But by all means, utilize your words to the exact."

Jane's color returned slowly, and she nodded, perhaps enthralled more in Ludwig's face and voice than his advice. She stumbled right past Lemmy to catch up with Zelda, who had already finished greeting the koopaling. Zelda rolled her eyes at her friend, but let her shake Roy's hand first. Jane quickly found herself and said, "I'm honored to meet you, sire. I've heard a lot about you."

"Nawt too much d'oh, raught? Ch'yeah, I'd assume ya have. How you doin'?"

Jane smiled, honored by the question. "Well, quite well, thank you very much. And yourself?"

Roy smirked, ignoring Jane's innocent question, and turned to Zelda behind her. "And you, chickie? How you doin'?"

"We're doing just fine, Roy. Scott's last book did very well, so we don't need your aid this year. But my friend…" She leaned in, took Roy's hand as if very intense on shaking it, and muttered, "You know Sammy Koopa?"

Roy bit his tongue, then looked back into Zelda's eyes. "Yeah, yeah. He runs dat 'otel you an' Scott were at dat one time. Best business I've had in a while. What's wrong wif da goi?"

"He's had a few too many Snifits and Shy Guys around and a few too Koopas and Goombas, if you know what I mean."

Roy widened his eyes, interpreting Zelda just fine. "No kiddin'? Sammy's has gotta be da most secure joint I know 'a! And he's too good a' business teh let go…I'll look inter it, ch'yeah."

Zelda nodded, pulling away. Jane looked back, her eyes wide as koopa coins. Answering the unasked question, Zelda said, "Roy likes to party _almost_ as much as Scott and I do." They both tittered with laughter, and Jane shook hands with Iggy immediately.

"Such a pleasure to meet you, Prince Iggy. Such a pleasure…perhaps you've heard of me? Jane Frosten?"

Iggy considered the question for a while, and then clearly recognized Jane's name. "You're a famous author, aren't you? Yes, yes…that last book of yours has been on the Bestsellers list for awhile."

Jane grinned. "Indeed it has. I've already talked with three different studios about the film rights."

Iggy looked over at Zelda, waiting patiently in line. He took her hand as well, asking, "And you're Zelda Icegerald, correct?"

Zelda smiled, looking over at Jane. "Yeah, I am. Recognize me for my husband's books, right?"

Iggy laughed. "No; I recognize you from the tabloids."

At the word "tabloids", Wendy was instantly done talking with the mouse family, and was peering over to see what celebrity Iggy was mocking this time. She squealed, literally pushing the youngest mouse ahead to get Zelda closer. She thrust her claw into Zelda's wing and quickly got her cool. "Zelda! I, like, totally recognize you."

"Yeah, I recognize you too. Weren't you in that one party with the-"

"I, like, don't like to, like, talk about that party," Wendy neatly interrupted. She glanced around before leaning in to Zelda and whispering, "Bad memories. Tabs haven't, like, heard the story yet and I really don't, like, wann'em to. Know what I mean?"

Zelda laughed. "Yeah, I do. Trust me, I've had my number of mistakes. Do you remember reading about the time I got caught in that big tub of cheese?"

"And you were, like, totally covered in goombas too?"

"Yeah, well, the real story's about thirty times worse. Let's just say I'm really glad Scott loves me." They both laughed, Wendy happy with yet another celebrity kindred soul.

Zelda looked over at Jane, who seemed a bit impatient and unappreciated. "Have you heard of Jane Frosten?" Wendy's eyes went from alive and happy to blank within seconds. "Famous author?" The princess's eyes glazed over, now clear as she had no interest in books, she had no interest in that guest _at all_. "She wrote the story that inspired _Klueless_."

Wendy's eyes popped open, and she squealed. "No way! No. Way. Seriously?" She squealed again, yanking her claw out of Zelda's wing and grabbing Jane's. "I, like, _totally_ love that movie. It's, like, one of my most favorite ever. Cher is totally like my hero and _dang_ that girl can dress! I'm, like, sooooo happy I met you. But, like, what's your name?"

Jane looked at Wendy and smiled, a bit fakely. As royal and famous as Wendy was, Jane didn't exactly put her on par with Ludwig. "Jane. Jane Frosten."

Zelda leaned back to Jane and whispered, "Let's try and get around this mouse family. Once Morton starts talking to you, he won't stop, and I'd really like to see the Princess before we go home." Jane took her friend's advice and they tried to creep past the mice, the parents looking horrified by Morton's language and shallow insults. The children, however, were delighted at this new development that a_ royal_ was saying such easily-repeatable insults.

Jane bent down to talk to Larry, although he was easily taller than the pudgy penguin and she had to look up from her crouched position. "Well, hey there, Prince Larry! How are _you_ doing?"

Larry glared at Jane, hissing, "Just fine, thank you. Thanks for coming."

"It's fun, huh? Being at your daddy's birthday party?"

"It's fun, huh?" Larry mocked, taking Jane's baby-voice perfectly, "Trying to annoy a very bored koopa who hates line-cutters in the first place, can breathe fire and is more fit than you'll ever be in your life and who has diplomatic immunity and the support of seven other equally bored and equally if not more fit and able to breathe fire siblings who all also have diplomatic immunity, not to mention a father who…well…is King Bowser. Fun, huh?"

Jane's face had gone white again, and Zelda avoided eye contact with Larry as she said, "Jane doesn't have children…"

Jane turned to look at Zelda and hissed, "And now you know why!" Rolling her eyes, they moved to Bowser Junior, who seemed perfectly content to sit on the floor and grab the ankles of unsuspecting guests. He personally didn't give a care what these rich jerks thought about him- he figured they'd have to love him when he was king anyway, and this is what his Dad would _probably_ do if Peach wasn't here. Jane and Zelda were all too pleased to skip him anyway.

Kammy smiled at the two friends, said "Pleasure to have you here. I'm sure King Bowser is honored you came to celebrate him," and shook their hands. Apparently, that was all she felt she had to say all night.

"Jane Frosten. Nice to meet you, Lady Kammy. I've always been a fan of your magic and your strength in handling His Majesty. It's lovely to put a face to the stories."

Kammy smiled. This too, apparently, was something she expected. As if rehearsed, she said, "That's very kind of you, Jane. I hope to see you in the future." She smiled again, turned to Zelda, and recited the same exact greeting she had given Jane.

"Getting bored already, are you?" Zelda asked, hoping to find a more personal niche with Kammy as they had with the koopalings.

Yet Kammy still seemed robotic as she forced a laugh. "Not too bored; its lovely to meet all these people. I hope to see you in the future, too." Zelda smiled, hissing something to shut up Jane as she laughed. Kammy waved at them as they moved on to Kamek, and then turned to shake the hands of the mouse family.

Kamek, after cleaning his glasses, put them back on. He genuinely smiled at the penguins, bowing low before them. "I pray you enjoyed yourselves tonight, ladies."

"We certainly did, Sir Kamek. Did you?" Jane asked politely.

"Indeed I have, so far! I haven't had such an…entertaining…birthday ball for years. The break-dancing competition was absolutely fantastic this year. His Amazingness's competition gets stiffer every year."

Zelda looked past Kamek and noticed no one was talking to Bowser- he had scared the guests before out the door before they even said a word to Peach. As good of a conversationist as Kamek seemed, Bowser was a much more exciting person to talk to. She rushed past Jane, laughing at something Kamek said, and situated herself in front of the koopa king.

Zelda gasped- Bowser was far, _far_ more intimidating in person than she ever expected. She bowed low and elegantly, but Bowser's face was still stoic when she returned to the surface. "H…Happy Birthday…s-sire." Suddenly, she felt very small and understood why the goomba ahead had ran out of the room. "H-have you enjoyed it-tyet? I-I mean s-so far."

Bowser smirked, impressed the skinny penguin had lasted this long. "Yeah. Peach is here, so it'd be pretty dang hard not to enjoy it."

Zelda pursed her beak, squeaking out a "good" and grabbing Jane's wing, pulling her away from Kamek and right past Bowser. "Let's talk to Peach!" she shrieked.

"But, I want to talk to-"

"No, you don't." Bowser growled at Jane, raising a bushy eyebrow in a questioning way.

"Okay, well…Happy Birthday…" Jane muttered, quickly feeling insignificant.

"Bowser!" Peach said accusingly, "Why are you scaring all your guests away?"

"Because," he answered, ignoring the mice in front of him, "They need to be scared. Otherwise they'll go home and tell everyone we're best friends and I'll have to go to a million weddings and baby showers and birthday parties every month. Plus, it's more fun."

Peach laughed, shook her head, and turned to the penguins. "You'll have to excuse him," she said with a smile, "he's a little…bored, let's say. I don't believe I've met you ladies yet…what were your names?"

"I'm Zelda Icegerald, and this is Jane Frosten." Zelda answered, instantly feeling comfortable with the well-practiced Peach.

Peach titled her head, amused and interested by the answers. "Really? The wife of Eff Scott Icegerald, the famous author, is friends with Jane Frosten, the famous author?"

Jane took Zelda's wing and answered, "since childhood!"

Peach laughed and shook their wings in turn. "Isn't that something? I'm a bit disappointed I haven't met either of you before…don't like visiting the Mushroom Kingdom or something?"

"Well, Scott and I usually go on trips to enjoy ourselves instead of meeting his fans, and Jane doesn't get out much."

"Oh, Jane, you would undoubtedly love the Mushroom Kingdom. There's a little inn in Toad Town you absolutely _must_ stay at if you go…charming little place with a library only the castle can compete with. Also, the owner makes absolutely the best mushroom cookies…but I suppose you ladies aren't too familiar with those, are you?"

Peach's small talk continued until the uniformed koopa next to her nudged the Princess. She thanked them for coming on Bowser's behalf, shook their wings again, and waved them goodbye. Apparently, the koopa's only purpose was to tell Peach she was holding up the line.

Out the door, Zelda was telling Jane something about Peach when Jane stamped her foot down. "Darn it! We forgot to talk to her about Bowser!"

"Did we need to?" Zelda asked playfully as they walked towards the Palace's exit. "I mean, really. If you were watching her _at all_, she was only looking at us to be polite. She couldn't keep her _eyes_ off him…and half the time he brushed his claw against her hand, she grabbed it. It was so obvious; I was surprised they weren't off in some closet, macking each others' faces off."

"Zeldy!" Jane laughed, punching her friend lightly. "That's no way to talk about two dignitaries like Princess Peach and King Bowser." She walked a little bit, smirking as she corrected, "They probably have more interesting things to do in a closet than _just_ kiss."

xxxx0o0o0o0o0o0o0xxxx

After shaking a disgustingly tall koopa's hand, Bowser glanced through the doorway. To his delight, some koopa troopas began to close it, signifying the last of the second-half guests had arrived and there was no more line to stand in for the rest of the night. Everyone in line seemed relieved, Kammy stretching and wringing her hands before releasing the eager-to-leave koopalings from their magic bindings. The seven youngest ran off through the dance floor, Ludwig heading slowly and in a dignified manner towards the winding staircases.

"Ludwig," Peach called, waving her hand in the air.

The eldest koopaling turned around, his hair swinging to catch up. "What seems to be the matter, Princess Peach?"

"I was wondering; do you think you could show me where the orchestra plays?"

Ludwig stood in place, thinking. "I suppose that could be good experience for you. I always say that people should indulge themselves in as much musical enlightenment as possible. I must give you a proper tocsin- it is very much a stentorian environment in the orchestra, as the reverberations are direct. However, you should enjoy it." He began to walk away, pointing up the stairs and telling Peach where to go.

She turned around to face Bowser. "Are you coming?"

"Yeah…I guess. Seems kinda boring, but if you're going, I guess I'll go."

Peach walked over to Bowser and laced her arm through his, pulling him along towards the stairs. "Aw, come on now. He's your son, you should support him. Besides, you can try out your birthday present he gave you!"

Bowser smiled, both at Peach's touch and her reminder. "Oh yeah, that control-stick-thingy."

"It's called a baton, Bowser," Peach giggled. By now they were already up at the level with the food, waiters and other food koopas moving the current food out and replacing it with light meal buffets for the new guests.

Ludwig led them up to the third floor where, as he told them, it was very, very loud. Peach laughed, but her laughter wasn't even heard. The orchestra was so engrossed in their music that they didn't even notice King Bowser in their midst until he stepped up to the front behind Ludwig.

Ludwig gingerly took the baton from Gregory, excused him to his seat, and led the song to a premature end. He leaned over the music stand and said, "My father has come to be a guest conductor for a song, so give him your best attention. Then, I will return to position and this dilatory performance can resume as the portent it deserves to be." He stepped down and bowed to his father. "I believe you have a baton already, Father."

Bowser grinned at Ludwig and stomped onto the platform. He whipped out the black baton and glanced over at Ludwig. "How do you make it go?" Obediently, Ludwig moved his hand in a sweeping right triangle. Bowser did the same and found, to his delight, that the orchestra played music each time his hand moved through the triangle.

Thrilled with this power, he moved the baton in tiny triangles, laughing as the orchestra immediately quieted down. Then, as he made his conducting large, they became loud. Fast- they played fast. Slow- they played slow. The power was impenetrable, and it was all his.

Peach laughed with delight as Bowser led the music, finding special joy in holding one note long and then quickly moving on. Ludwig, however, had his claws clamped firmly over his ears and his eyes tightly shut to avoid being exposed to the musical abuse his orchestra had succumbed to.

After a bit, Bowser shouted for his son's attention. Somehow, through all his barriers, Ludwig heard Bowser and snapped his eyes open. "How do I get it to stop? I'm bored." Ludwig twirled his hand in a spiral, and Bowser repeated. Instantly, the music stopped, echoes the only noise in the entire third floor.

Ludwig practically ran to take back control of his orchestra, bowing low as he stood in front of his father. "Good…job…Father. I'll…take them back now." Bowser grunted and walked off the stand, Ludwig clambering up it and delighted to stand as the conductor again.

Bowser was grinning by the time he reached Peach. He took her hand as they started down the stairs to the main floor again. "Haven't seen him at that much of a loss for words for years. Was I _that_ good?"

"Actually, I think it took him every cell in his body to not stop you from wrecking everything."

"Hmph. Well, then, I guess he just doesn't appreciate music."

xxxx0o0o0o0o0o0o0xxxx

Luigi's eyes groggily opened, awakened by the rapping on his door. He looked up at his dark ceiling, rolled over to look at Mario's snoring form, and over at the door. Someone knocked again.

Muttering nonsensical words, he swung his feet over the bed and stumbled towards the door. Unfortunately, he forgot the literal lack of walking space in the dark and tripped over a piece of furniture. Luigi shrieked, frantically swinging his arms and thus knocking down a lamp and tripping over three more objects in his path. Finally, he reached the door, panting wildly. It was too dark to survey his destruction, but it was enough for a light across the hall to turn on. Mario, however, didn't notice a thing.

Luigi swung the door wide open, revealing his groggy and ruined state to Daisy.

"Morning, sunshine!" Daisy sang. She grinned at Luigi's death stare, continuing with, "I had a bad dream."

"You woke-a me up…because you had-a bad-a dream?"

"Basically, yeah." Daisy pulled Luigi out of his room and into the dimly lit hallway. "You look horrible, Luigi."

"I-a wonder why," he growled, rubbing his bloodshot eyes. "What was your-a dream about-a, Daisy?"

"Peach. And Bowser."

"Bowser kidnapped-a Peach?"

"No, no…that's normal. This dream was _crazy_."

"Were they-a running off to-a the circus dressed in-a donuts and-a linguini?"

"What?"

"Oh wait-a. That was-a my dream." Luigi blinked, turned around, and tried to go back to his room.

"No, that wasn't why it was crazy," Daisy continued, spinning Luigi back around to face her. "They were on a date or something. And Peach was like in _love_ with Bowser or something. It was so crazy!"

"You woke-a me up. To tell me you-a had a dream. And it was-a just Peach and-a Bowser. Dancing. In-a dream-a. Daisy, do you-a see anything wrong at all with-a this situation?"

Daisy sighed, rolling her eyes. "Well, _I_ thought it was a crazy dream. Besides, there were all these…flowers everywhere."

"Flowers? Rea-lly?" Luigi raised his eyebrows, his eyelids still heavy. "Mumma-Mia, Daisy. So what?"

"Well…you and Mario are twins, right? You know the twin-thing, where you can sort of…see what Mario's seeing?"

Not waiting for an answer, Daisy excitedly continued. "Well, even though we're just cousins, Peach and I sorta have that thing too. It's only happened like, three times before, but I'll dream something and there'll be all sorts of daises everywhere, and then when I wake up, Peach tells me that she was doing something like that. Or _she'll_ have a dream where the same thing happens, but with _me_…and peaches…which is probably a lot scarier than flowers. Lots and lots of fruit falling from the sky would be _really_ creepy."

"Daisy," Luigi sighed, "I'm too tired for this. You woke-a me up to tell me you had a dream. You could have-a told me in-a the morning."

"It's not _just_ a dream, Luigi. I was trying to tell you, I think she might _actually_ be with Bowser!...or dancing…or just dressed up. Lots of times these dreams get far from the-"

"Okay, okay. I'm-a sorry. You woke-a me up to tell me you had a dream, and that-a Peach may or may-a not be with-a Bowser, and that she is-a probably dressed up."

Daisy pursed her lips and slouched. "Well, you make it sound stupid."

"Good. I need-a to go back to-a bed now, Daisy. Good-a night."

"What, not even a good night kiss?" Daisy whined.

"No."

Instead of pouting, Daisy smirked. "Y'know, I should talk to you when you're tired more often. Never seen you this forceful." She pecked Luigi again, then started down the hall, imagining Luigi's expression…angry, but too love-struck to show it.

xxxx0o0o0o0o0o0o0xxxx

"You know, Peach," Bowser cooed, looking down at his date, "I've never danced this much in my life."

"Hmm?" She asked, her eyes closed and face pressed against Bowser's chest. "What do you usually do at balls?"

Bowser's arms were wrapped around Peach, and she was likewise. He was simply in heaven as they swayed to the slow music. "Sit in a corner and grunt." He heard her giggle, but she stayed in the same position. Bowser lowered his head to rest it on the top of Peach's. He, too, closed his eyes and moved with her in this position neither wanted to leave. That is, until Peach stopped moving.

The Koopa's eyes snapped open and he pulled away to look down. Peach's head fell a bit as her resting spot jumped away, and she looked up, almost groggily, at Bowser. "Why'd you move?" she asked.

"Why did you _stop_ moving?"

Peach blinked in confusion, then giggled. "I forgot we were dancing."

Bowser softened his expression, grabbing her roughly and looking back down. "What did you think we were doing then? Sleeping standing up?"

Quickly throwing her arms back over and around Bowser's neck, Peach nuzzled her face back into Bowser's chest and breathed in his musky, cologne scented odor. "I could fall asleep on you, I bet. You're so warm…and soft…it's very, very soft."

Although Peach's style of 'dancing' wasn't quite what the new song's tempo called for, Bowser didn't argue. He took any chance to hold her this perilously and impossibly close. "Yeah, well, that's our secret." He swayed a bit more with her, listening to Peach hum the Latin-beat song the band was playing. She apparently knew what song it was, even though she was far from the tango that everyone around them was attempting. "You must be really, really tired, Peachy. You want a drink?"

"Ooh, let's get some more of that purple stuff. With the blue bubbles." Peach giggled. "I like that stuff."

Now, Bowser stopped dancing. "Peach, you drank the purple stuff with the blue bubbles?"

Peach didn't seem to have the strength to pull her face out of Bowser's chest, but she did anyway, staring up at him. "Yeah, I had four…or five…I dunno…glasses."

Bowser shook her in place, but Peach just giggled. "How did you get them? That drink is in the bar and only served to koopas…its too strong for you. It's a-"

Uninterested and tired, Peach fell back onto Bowser and giggled. "A big guy gave it to me. He looked a little like you…but not as handsome. And he was bald."

"You think I'm handsome?" Bowser asked, looking down at his Princess with wide-eyes. Of course, in Peach's condition there wasn't much reliability to whatever she said, but still…_handsome_…

"Are we gonna get more purple stuff?" Peach asked in a slur as Bowser led her over to the bar.

"No, Peach. We're not. We're getting you some stuff to knock the purple stuff _out_ of you."

"Aw, Bowsy…" she whined playfully, stumbling to keep up, even with her hand in his.

Bowser's heart caught at the playful nickname, but it only made him pull her faster. As wonderful as Peach was to him like this, the faster she was back to normal and he knew what she said was what she meant to say, the faster he could actually appreciate the words.

"Hey, bartender," Bowser barked at the boar cleaning glasses behind the bar. "Get Cookoopa out here, now."

"And get more purple stuff! With the blue bubbles!" Peach added, giggling.

The boar looked from Peach, giggling and trying to fall back asleep on Bowser's chest, to the frustrated koopa king. "The koopale for you of course, sire?"

"No!" Bowser roared, a spark just missing Peach. "No koopale! Just get Cookoopa!"

The boar nodded and briskly rushed off into the kitchen. Peach mumbled from Bowser's chest, "why didn't you get any more purple stuff, Bowsy?"

"Because I love you, that's why."

Before Peach could get her response out, Cookoopa was out of the kitchen. She took one look at Peach, and looked up at Bowser curiously. "Dichu give her koopale, sire?"

"No, someone else did. Get me an antidote for her, Cookie." He ordered. Cookoopa nodded and left, returning within minutes with a blue drink, purple bubbles fizzing on top.

"No offense meant, sire, but I don't think you got it in you to administer this correctly. You just let Cookoopa take care of sweet Miss Peach, mm?" Cookoopa walked out of the bar, holding out a hand to take Peach's.

Bowser sighed and reached up to grab Peach's hands from off his neck. She blinked up at him and asked what he was doing, but before he could answer, Cookoopa had Peach's nose plugged and her mouth wide open with the same hand. She poured the antidote into her mouth, and the moment the cup was empty forcibly shut Peach's mouth. "Swallow, hun," Cookoopa ordered, looking straight into Peach's glazed eyes.

Unable to talk, Peach shook her head. Cookoopa nodded hers, somehow convincing the princess to swallow. Once she swallowed, her eyes immediately scrunched shut and Peach began to sputter. She grabbed the closest thing to her, Cookoopa, and started to wheeze.

"What did you do to her?" Bowser roared, sparks shooting out of his mouth as he stared Cookoopa down.

"Donchu worry, sire. She's just recovering…she had a _lot_ of koopale…but-" Peach's breathing had returned to normal, and now she was staring at the cook, confused where she had suddenly come from. "-she's fine now." Cookoopa looked at her in the eyes and smiled. "Peach, how do you feel?"

"Fine…but where did you come from? And where's-"

"So!" A voice roared out, approaching the bar, "Sleeping Beauty awakes!"

* * *

**Author's Note:** So, by 29 I guarantee the ball will be over. I might even have had it done by 28, but I wanted to include a beautiful scene requested by Mistress of Weirdness (TK, yours is firmly in my head for later on!) so I pushed it...but I like it this way with more breathing room for the end of the ball, so yay. Besides this fun scene, 28 is muuuuch better than this one. Much fluffier, too!

Oh, and speaking of the Mistress, I'd like to direct you all towards her "The Magikoopa Chronicles", a brilliant and unappreciated peice of writing. Also Kaggerz told me a few weeks ago she was chipping away on "Married to the Koopa King" (update, you!) and the lovely Mikari is always supplying us with fluff. So, my friends, don't distress when I'm lacking in updates. The last suggestion I gave you died as I never heard from ZAD again, but I know these authors are just as talented ane definetly online!

(sorry for the long A/N. I was trying to not slobber about how much I love you, so the bottom of the page looked rather empty compared to normal. I just can't seem to not tell you guys...Oh drat, now I'm slobbering.) -Razzi


	28. Looking on the Outside

**Foreword: **okay, so I'm actually not 100 percent done with 29...I have like _3_ paragraphs left or something crazy like that. But I was really excited to get you guys this chapter so I just said "screw it, I'm publishing today!"

This one is quite fluffy. C: You get the answer to last chapter's "mystery" if any of you were mystified.

There's also a request put into this chapter, so that means Disclaimer at the end. Oh, I know, you're miserable. Here's a tissue.

* * *

"Oh, there he is," Peach muttered, watching the great giant koopa walk over, a slightly smaller koopa lady on his arm. They both had the same breeding looks of Bowser, the one who spoke looked just as Peach had described him…similar to Bowser, but bald. He also had a red head and shell, while the koopa on his arm was tan all over, from her stylish short hair to her toeclaws.

Bowser nudged Peach. "Is he the koopa who bought you the drinks?" Peach nodded, taking a generous gulp of the water Cookoopa had given her. Bowser sighed, turning to the great koopa as he approached. "Borvis, what were you doing poisoning Princess Peach? Do you _want_ to end up in a dungeon somewhere?"

"Of course not!" Borvis answered, looking appalled. "I was _trying_ to do you a favor. She ended up in your arms, didn't she? Besides, I wanted to show Layla how strong koopale really is."

Bowser stood up, glaring at the smirking koopa. Bowser was taller than the Borvis by only a few inches, and he leaned in close, growling, "Try your science experiments on someone else next time. But other than that…" Bowser's stern face broke into a grin, and he hugged the other koopa with a slap on the shoulder. "Glad you came, Borv."

Bowser turned to Peach, tipping his head towards the koopas. "Peach, this is my very favorite brother, Borvis, and his wife, Layla."

Borvis grinned and bowed to Peach, saying, "I believe we've met."

Layla smiled and shook the Princess's hand, adding, "and I apologize that you had to meet him in the first place."

Peach looked suspiciously up at Bowser, but saw him sincerely laughing. After another draught of water- anything to flush that awful stuff out of her system- she turned to meet Layla's eyes. They were bright, yet a bit exhausted from her husband. Apparently, this guy was as innocent in intentions as he seemed when they met. Peach finally smiled and waved her hand. "I don't even remember what happened after that first drink he gave me, but if Bowser's still talking to him, I'm sure I'm fine."

Layla smiled, looking from Peach to Bowser. "I guess that's one way to tell. Yeah, Bowser wouldn't let a fly touch you unless it had good intentions. But I'm afraid he's probably a bit biased towards my husband…they really go back."

"Try since hatching!" Borvis laughed, smacking his wife lightly on the arm and his brother not quite so lightly.

The Latin song ended, changing to a swing song. Borvis grinned. "Did you know, Princess Peach, that I've won more swing competitions than anyone in this room?"

"I didn't, actually." Peach laughed.

"Would you like to see how it paid off?" He asked, putting out a claw for Peach to take.

"Hey," Bowser grunted, "Peach is _my_ date. You can't dance with her! Especially not after you practically poison her!"

"Then you can dance with Layla. You two are about bad at swing enough for each other," Borvis offered, pushing his wife towards his brother.

As willing as everyone seemed around Borvis, he still wasn't in Peach's good books. "Hey now, I don't know if I should even dance with you. You…gave me amnesia somehow."

Borvis's smile twinkled in response. "Exactly why you _should_ dance with me. I'm very mysterious."

After a bit more teasing all around and some considerable warming up on Peach's half, the two new couples were dancing on the floor. Borvis was exactly right in his estimate- Layla and Bowser were almost hopeless as the experienced swing-dancing koopa and the light and lively human were stealing the spotlight.

"Sorry about using you in my little experiment, highness," Borvis apologized, instantly moving his feet in a lively swing-step.

"I…I guess I forgive you. I ended up okay…but why did you-"

"Oh come on, you can't _really_ blame me for you getting yourself intoxicated on that stuff. Remember what I said when I came over?"

"I don't remember that much, to be honest," Peach admitted as Borvis tossed her from side-to-side.

"Please," Borvis smirked, "if anyone understands the full effects of koopale, it's me. You can still remember everything before those first drinks. I approached you, told you there was a delicious drink that, as a human, the bartender would be a bit racist against giving you-"

"And that was lie number one!" Peach noted, swinging from under Borvis's legs.

Borvis tsk'd Peach as he returned to the quick-step, correcting, "that was _misleading truth_ number one. I don't lie to any pretty women except my realtor, employees, and occasionally my wife."

"I think telling me that my vision impairment was 'just from the fizz getting in my eyes' and completely unrelated to the light-headedness 'from drinking too fast' counts as a lie, buddy," Peach growled, flipping over his shoulders as easily as piece of cloth.

"Again, not quite. If you look at how the koopale affects the body, it's really a very separate ordeal. But, I guess the fizz and drinking-too-fast bits were kind of…lies. But frankly, highness, I'm impressed you remembered past your first glass!"

"Well, I don't remember how you got me to take more than one, if that makes you feel superior at all."

Borvis just grinned. Spinning Peach violently to the other side, he abruptly asked, "what do you think of my brother?"

"Guilty conscience, eh?" Peach asked, spinning back to Borvis's side. After a sigh, Peach began, "Well, I certainly think higher of him than I used to. He's surprisingly…charming," as she spread out her limbs during the lift.

"Has he told you he loves you yet?"

Peach laughed and rolled her eyes, waiting to be unspun before answering, "only about a thousand times every day."

"Sounds like him," Borvis laughed. They did some steps in place as he continued. "When we were growing up all he ever talked about was being king, you, and being king _with_ you. He trusted me with everything he knew about you…I probably understand how much he loves you more than _you_ do."

Borvis dipped Peach, then spun her lightly until he dipped her the other way. "That's why he wasn't too angry I drugged you up. He knows I wouldn't do anything to you, because that would be the biggest hurt he could ever have."

"That's sweet,"

"But Peach," Borvis growled, "I told you that so you understand what I'm saying now- don't you _ever_ hurt my brother. You're the only one who could really do it, and if you break his heart, I'll break your face. Because you'll end up breaking the entire empire that way."

"Oh, come on now, Bowser's stronger than that."

"No, he's not." Borvis growled, tossing Peach into the air again. "So you watch it."

Peach was feeling a bit nervous now, being thrown around in dance with this threatening koopa. He was obviously unaffected by her attempts at guilting him for drugging her. Suddenly, his stoic expression broke into a grin. "But anyway, Peachy, what's it like living in the Darklands for a week?"

"Uh…what?"

Borvis reminded Peach a great deal of his brother. He was more than frightening in his image and words, but at the same time seemed more than willing to make a joke. In fact, he seemed much more light-hearted than Bowser. Perhaps that had something to do with Bowser's responsibilities and Borvis's lack there of. "The Darklands! How are you liking it all?"

"I guess I'm liking it…it's not bad or anything, I mean. I'm…I'm having fun, I mean."

"Have you seen the kingdom yet?"

"A little…I went out with Bowser to accept some of his birthday gifts, so…its surprising how…diverse, I guess, the kingdom is."

The song stopped and, after applause, changed to a much faster dance song. It didn't take Layla long to escape Bowser's equally horrible swing dancing and come up to Peach and Borvis. "As much as I hate to break up this dynamic duo, may I cut it?"

Peach took her hands out of Borvis's and smiled at Layla, presenting her husband to her. Layla shook her head. "Actually, Peach, I wanted to dance with _you_."

Bowser, who was standing just over her shoulder, threw his hands up in distress. "Do I _ever_ get to dance with _my_ Peach?" he roared in frustration.

Peach laughed. "Bowser, I'll just be with her for a bit. That way I can meet more of your friends…next slow song, I promise, I would love to dance with you."

Bowser grinned. "You'd _love_ to?"

Softly, Peach replied, "Of course…"

Layla rolled her eyes and tugged Peach away. "Come on, lovebird. Let's go before the song's over."

"Lovebird?" Peach shrieked as Layla pulled her out to the dance floor.

Layla laughed, "You should see your face!" She quickly began to dance in place, but Peach was still just staring at her as if she had killed a puppy. "Liven up, highness! It was a joke."

Peach's toe was tapping to the music as she placed her hands on her hips. "It was a joke? You're sure?"

"Well…sort of." Layla raised a beautifully shaped eyebrow in teasing. "You do seem quite twitter-pated, highness."

"With…with Bowser?" Peach was now dancing, just not as enthusiastically as Bowser's sister-in-law.

"Mmhmm. Borvy and I were watching you when you were intoxicated with that koopale stuff."

"What did I do?"

Layla giggled. "Koopale tends to make your real intentions come out and completely wipe away inhibitions. As well as other things…"

Peach stopped dancing, fear clear on her face. "I didn't kiss him, did I?"

Layla's eyes widened and she grinned. "Apparently, fear _also_ makes real intentions come out." She laughed, grabbing Peach on the shoulders and laughing into her dress. "No, you didn't kiss him. Do you want to?"

Peach squeezed her eyes shut and shook her head. "No, I don't. If I wanted to kiss Bowser, I already would have."

"What does that mean?" Layla laughed at Peach's frustrated face and put a claw back on her shoulder. Lightly, she said, "I'm just messing with you, highness. It's in my blood to love being mean."

"Shouldn't that be on Bowser's side of the family?"

"It's just a koopa thing, I guess." Layla grinned at Peach, continuing her outrageous dancing.

It seemed that every free moment she had, Layla would say something to tease Peach about her date. At first, it had purely embarrassed Peach. She had intended to avoid Bowser and thus prove anyone like Layla who was certain of their love wrong. But as the dance got on, it felt almost like Layla was mocking her for appreciating Bowser and mocking Bowser for loving her. Now, Peach was just angry.

The song ended, and Layla laughed, "I'm going to go find my husband now…you can go spend some time with your _beloved_, highness!"

Peach watched Layla wave goodbye before she skipped off towards her husband. Peach closed her eyes and took a deep breath, opening them and looking for Bowser. There he was, standing where Borvis was waiting for Layla, and looking very helpless. Like a lost puppy, looking for its owner.

Bowser caught sight of Peach and lit up, waving frantically. He started pointing furiously up at Ludwig's orchestra, trying to get Peach to realize, in case she hadn't, that it was a slow song.

Peach's anger seemed to melt as she watched Bowser's adorable face, full of child-like enthusiasm. She even giggled a bit, walking perhaps too fast towards him. When she was about half-way there, she picked up her skirt and took off towards him at a run.

When she was close enough, and she was sure Layla was watching, Peach launched herself into Bowser's arms, throwing her own around his neck and breathing in his heavy, musky scent. "I missed you," she murmured.

"I missed you more," Bowser muttered, running his claws through her hair. He certainly missed her for different reasons, but still, Borvis nudged Bowser in the arm, winking. Bowser looked over at his brother, grinning and mouthing 'thank you' to both Borvis and his wife.

Borvis and Layla comically bowed to Bowser, arm-in-arm walking off towards the dance floor. "Hun, you're really good," Borvis muttered to Layla as they left Peach's earshot.

"I know!" Layla laughed, her eyes sparkling. "To work a girl right, you gotta know how she's gonna think. I just had to get Peach to want to never see him again, then get her to never want to see me again, then want to prove me wrong by proving me right in a way I would never expect to be right and-"

Borvis put a claw over Layla's mouth and raised his eyebrows. "I believe you. You're good. You're sister-in-law of the year. Now can we just dance?"

Layla put her tan hands on Borvis's face, pulling him down to her height. She kissed him tenderly and whispered; "Now we can."

xxxx0o0o0o0o0o0o0xxxx

"So you're ready to dance then, Peach?"

Peach pulled out of Bowser's embrace, holding his hand as she looked around the dance floor. Every third couple was staring at them, including the ever-smirking Layla. "Actually…"Bowser sighed a bit, avoiding Peach's eyes. Of course, this was too good to be true. He bit his lip as he braced himself for Peach's inevitable response. "Can we dance somewhere more private?"

"Sure, I'll go tell Kammy you're ready to…go somewhere what?"

"What?"

"What did you say?"

"What were _you_ saying?"

Bowser looked at Peach's confused yet amused expression, and started to laugh. "I thought…it doesn't matter. I know _exactly_ where we can go." He started to lead Peach up the stairs, leading her towards a huge wall of windows. A few of these windows, apparently, were actually doors to a beautiful expansive porch.

After Bowser opened the door for Peach, she rushed out. With the door shut, the slow music eased enough for them to hear, but the rabble of the crowd was perfectly muted. Crickets, a few rushing vehicles, and night birds were all that they could hear. They were alone, the two of them and the millions of stars above.

Rather gentlemanly, Bowser approached Peach with his hand out. Peach placed her hand lightly in his, reaching up to hold his shoulder as he held her back lightly. She stared up at him and smiled. "This…is perfect."

xxxx0o0o0o0o0o0o0xxxx

The Darklands seemed to have perfect night-time weather. The natural heat from the VolcanoPalace and lava flowing below kept the air warm and pleasant, but a light breeze kept them both perfectly content. Content to sit beneath the stars, dance among the crickets, or laugh and talk in their own world completely, as Peach and Bowser had for over an hour now.

Bowser and Peach leaned over the banister on the porch. The city below them bustled with activity, the cars and noises far too distant to give anything but quiet ambience. The lights from buildings, advertisements, and lava rivers glittered in the pollutant haze just as the stars above did. It was as if the royals were suspended between two heavens, existing in their own heaven of far superiority.

"See over there?" Bowser asked, pointing over towards the huge clock tower that presided over the city. "That's a restaurant behind the clock face. I wanna take you there for lunch tomorrow."

"So you are taking me out for sure tomorrow? You didn't even talk to anyone about your meetings."

"Those darned meetings will be sitting around as long as I want. I only get you for a couple more days…"

Peach was quiet. Finally, she answered, "I almost wish I could stay longer-"

"You can!"

"-But everyone's expecting me, and we're going to Grand Canal. I'm really…I'm really excited." Peach sounded anything but. She could almost hear Bowser pouting behind her. Before he could manage to say something, she said, "Are you _sure_ it's okay to skip more meetings? I mean, I could do something else tomorrow, if you want…"

"If I want?" Bowser stared at Peach as if she was crazy. "If I _want_?" He roared. You think I think you're a hassle? Peach!" Bowser started to laugh, grabbing Peach roughly by the arms. He looked into her wide eyes and softly laughed, "I love you! I want to spend every moment I live with you! I'd give up my entire kingdom to see your face whenever I wanted. I would never, _ever_, want to go to a meeting instead of being with you."

Peach smiled, blushing up at Bowser. "Sorry, I guess I just thought…I'm not used to…you."

Bowser chuckled, putting his claw on Peach's face. "I'm not used to you either."

"So, we're definitely going into town tomorrow, then?"

"Like it or not," Bowser growled flirtatiously.

In the silence that followed, Peach heard the music in the ballroom change to a slow song. "Listen!" She whispered, her eyes bright as she looked up at Bowser.

Bowser listened, hearing the music and chuckling. He put his other claw on Peach's other cheek and muttered, "You really love these dances, don't you?" Peach nodded, her head at home in Bowser's hands. "I do too…any excuse to hold you."

As Bowser lifted his hands off her face and placed them on her hips, Peach daintily put her hands on Bowser's shoulders. They danced in silence, Peach smiling at Bowser's internal fight to stop himself from kissing her. Peach opened her mouth to say something, but the patio door slammed open, the slow music blaring in comparison to the silence they had just lost.

Kara stood silhouetted in the doorway, she hissed, "You are _not_ supposed to be out here."

"I can be wherever I want, lady face!" Bowser snarled, trying his best not to clench his claws on Peach's hips.

"You…" Kara pointed a clawed hand towards the ballroom, her extended arm shaking in anger, "are supposed…to be dancing…in…_there_."

"So what?" Bowser roared.

"So…go! In there! They're ready to open the doors for the ball's end!"

"What if I-" Peach lifted her hands off of Bowser's shoulders and wrenched his grip off of her hips. Bowser looked at her quizzically, readjusting herself away from dancing position. "What are you _doing_?"

Finally, Peach had freed herself, leaving Kara's arm extended and her expression confused, Bowser's claws still holding the air's hips, and his expression even more lost. "I'm going into the ballroom."

"…Why?"

"Because Kara said we should be in there, and she planned this whole thing. I think we'd better honor all her hard work best we can by following through."

Kara's hand flew from pointing at the ballroom to covering her smile, her glowing eyes giving her away anyway. "Thank you!" She squeaked, voice muffled from her hand.

Peach smiled at Kara and curtsied, and then she picked up her skirt and started into the ballroom. Bowser's mouth was still open in confusion, and then quickly he ran to keep up, brushing past Kara.

When he was finally caught up with Peach, heading down the stairs to the ballroom's main level, he muttered in her ear, "Why'd you leave?"

"I already told you. Kara's done so much to make this evening work, the least we could do is try and comply."

"But I thought you liked it out there!"

Peach stopped and looked up at Bowser. She dropped her skirt and put her hand on Bowser's face. "I did. But it's just as wonderful inside, as long as I have my dance partner with me."

Bowser grinned, saying, "You can have your dance partner any time you want him, Peachy." He moved her hand (as much as he loved it on his cheek) to his shoulders, adjusting themselves into their newfound favorite dancing pose, telling her as he worked, "I'm available all day, all night, twenty-four/seven. Just say the word and I'll come pick you up. We'll go to the moon together if we have to."

Peach giggled, swaying to the music with Bowser. "You keep telling yourself that," she teased, swallowing hard as if it could calm down her racing heart.

xxxx0o0o0o0o0o0o0xxxx

She was sitting by herself again, and that didn't please Kamek at all. He sighed, ordering two glasses of juice, and bringing the goblets over to the magikoopa sitting alone. Kamek's walk felt longer than usual, a bittersweet phenomenon. He was terrified by how wrong the next few moments could go, but enjoying watching her as well, playing with her silver hair and nudging her glasses.

All too soon, he was standing over her, suddenly forgetting what he was going to say. Instead, she glared at his presence. "Kamek, what are you planning on doing with that juice?"

"Give it to you. You looked lonely." He answered, snapping out of his momentary silence.

She glared at him and shook her head. "I'm not lonely. I'm not thirsty either."

"So you're just being a crotchety old hag for fun?" He asked, sincerely hoping his bitter teasing would get her realize how much of a hag she was, indeed, being. No matter how adorable she was cranky.

"Yes, Kamek. I came to the ball so I could sit around while everyone else dances like a dejected freak. I missed high school, y'see."

Kamek laughed. "I certainly don't miss that cursed place. I only survived by remembering I was one of those guys the girls would fight over years later."

"And how did _that_ work out for you, Kamek?"

"Not as well as I'd have hoped," he answered with a forced smile. "Only _have_ had one girl go for me, and that didn't end up working. Now I can't to even get an ugly old hag to dance."

"I can see why, if you call her that to her face," Kammy replied coldly, "besides, how is she supposed to dance if both your hands are occupied?"

Kamek then realized he had never given Kammy her juice, and began to blush. He set them down next to Kammy and stared down at her. "You know, they say the best way to get someone to ask for your hand in a dance is to dance with someone _else_. Inspire jealousy as they watch you flow in happiness with someone else, but just enough sorrow to inspire the coveter to try and cheer you up. I think that, maybe, that ugly hag would dance with me if she saw me dancing with you."

Kammy tried not to look confused. "I guess I'll try your little experiment, Kamek." She stood up, taking her place as Kamek's dancing partner, and he immediately swung them onto the dance floor. "So, if your ugly hag is out there, getting jealous, and I'm supposed to be the girl that she could beat if she wanted, what exactly would you call me?"

Kamek looked into her eyes, his face straight as he answered, "the ugliest, most fossilized, and haggiest in the room. Maybe even the whole kingdom."

Kammy looked at Kamek's eyes, shining in his backwards honesty. "I oughta blast you out through a window for that," she whispered, suddenly caught in his shining expression.

The silence didn't last long when a paratroopa, wings folded back to allow him to walk, tapped Kammy on the shoulder. Her eyes snapped from Kamek to the stranger, the dancing magikoopas stopping instantaneously. "If your husband doesn't mind," he began, glancing at Kamek.

"I'm not-"

"He's not-"

"We're not…not married," Kamek finally made out staring at the parakoopa.

His wings seemed to bristle, and the young man looked a bit uncomfortable. "Oh!" he squeaked, "well, then…if your…friend…wouldn't mind," he gulped and itched the back of his neck, clearly thinking _this was_ so_ stupid_ as he finished, "may I cut in?"

"What did I tell you, Kammy?" Kamek said with another forced smile, letting her go as she stared at the parakoopa. "Works every time…"

Not being able to stand the awkward position he now found himself in, Kamek rushed over to the juice. He didn't dare look at Kammy or the parakoopa, deciding not to imagine what foul trick was going on. Instead, he grabbed his juiced and downed the glass. As he tried to consider what to do without watching Kammy dance, he heard Bowser approach, laughing.

The koopa king crashed onto the seat next to him, laughing still. "That was the funniest thing I've seen all night."

"Excuse me, sire?" Kamek asked, beginning his second glass.

"You!" Bowser laughed again, illustrating with his hands. "You went over to Kammy, somehow convinced the old hag to dance, and then were holding her like she was going to explode or something. Thirty seconds later, you let some random parakoopa making some bet with his friends whisk her away like nothing. And you! You just stood there like an idiot before you _ran_ over here!" Laughing, Bowser hit his fist on the table, shaking the glasses. "Funniest thing _ever_."

"I'm sure it wasn't _that_ funny, sire." Kamek hissed, feeling put out indeed.

Bowser chuckled, finally calming down. "Well, it was to me. No clue why you _wanted_ to dance with Kammy the Kween of Krap, but still, that's part of why it's so funny."

"Sire, where's Princess Peach?" Kamek asked, trying desperately to change the subject.

"I was dancing with her, and…well…she's too nice. This guy came and she said they could dance for a song."

Kamek looked up at Bowser, his eyebrows raised high. "So…your dance got cut into _just like mine _even though you're the Koopa King and have the right to melt someone just for looking at Peach when you don't want them to but she left you for that random guy and _you're_ laughing at _me_?"

Glaring, Bowser answered, "At least I was dancing for more of the song than you. Besides, we'd been dancing practically all night. I don't want Peach to get too much of a good thing."

"I would have thought you'd be more…upset…that you lost her."

"I didn't lose her, idiot!" Bowser roared, smacking Kamek over the head. "She…stays within me."

Kamek looked over at Bowser, his expression lost in thought. "What do you mean?"

"Stays forever…" He looked down at Kamek, growling his explanation, "Everything she does. Glancing around, breathing lightly…blowing out a candle or combing out her hair. Even when she leaves," Bowser tapped his claw to his chest, over his heart. His eyes left Kamek and looked out towards the dancers on the floor, dancing the few last songs. He continued, his voice softened. "She's still there."

Kamek nodded, sighing. "I understand, sire. Pretty women…silhouetted in my thoughts, stay within me. Even when I'm not thinking about…either of them…they stay within me, memories from years ago or just days past.

"Pretty women at their mirrors, in their gardens, letter-writing-"

"Flower-picking, weather-watching…" Bowser continued, his mind far away but his heart firmly centered on Peach. "They've really got control on us, don't they?" Bowser laughed.

Kamek nodded. "They think you're strong, they think I'm powerful…but you'd fall on your knees for your pretty Peach. And I…I'm probably just as weak. Especially with my heart weak from the first fiasco, this girl just….just…Pretty women…" The old magikoopa shook his head, at a rare loss for words. Kamek glanced at Bowser, pouting as he considered Peach's similar hold on him, the smile hidden on his lips a give-away of his silhouetted love. "How they make men sing!" Kamek laughed.

"Proof of heaven as you're living!" Bowser agreed, slapping his claws back onto the table, his face aglow as he cheered up.

Juice sloshed in his glass as Kamek raised it. "Here's to pretty women!" He offered, jovially.

Picking up a glass from nearby, Bowser clinked in agreement. "Pretty women!"

Kamek drank his juice as Bowser crushed the empty glass in his fist. After a satisfied smack of his lips, Kamek muttered, "Can't live with them…"

"…Can't live without them." Bowser shook his head, smirking. "Such a stupid line. But so true, when it comes to my dear Peachy. At least she's happy now…at least I'm more alive than dead since she's come."

Kamek smiled for his king, noticing Peach searching for a glance at Bowser. She caught his eye, mouthing miserably, "next dance, please!" Amused, he looked for his own lost dance partner.

Kammy, however, didn't have a glance to waste on the old magikoopa.

* * *

**Author's Note: **Next chapter is the last chapter in the ball. :) That's pretty exciting, guys. Also, next chapter is very, very fun. One of my favorites. :D AND it includes you request, Senom299, so don't worry. It just didn't fit this chapter.

Speaking of requests, here's our Disclaimer: I unfortunately own Kara, Borvis, and Layla, but all the good characters go to Nintendo. Also, a fair amount of words at the very end belong to the song "Pretty Women" from _Sweeny Todd_, as per request of Mistress of Weirdness.

Now I've really got to go to school...I'm a fool for posting here at this time, but oh well!

-Razzi


	29. The Last Dance

**Foreword: **I KNOW THIS IS LATE and I'm sorry. I was having a boatload of trouble with 30, and I'm still barely half-through, but I knew I had to update soon, and as a special gift for Senom, who has found me on LJ and never ceases to make me smile, I decided today was a good update day.

AND another gift for Senom299 you can thank for, the very first scene is a request with Doopliss. :)

I really like this chapter. It's the end of the ball (Hallelujah!) so I wanted it to be extra-special...but for that extra-specialness to work, I have a request of you guys. Could you all please find a place where you can listen to Frank Sinatra's "The Last Dance" (I suggest YouTube) as you read the section that begins "Just as Bowser expected, as the goombas stepped out..."? I put a () there to remind you to press play just then...if you read at the correct pacing, it should all line up perfectly, with one or two exceptions within the song. It's just for added atmosphere...please don't think I imagine Bowser with Frankie's voice. Far from it. ;)

And Disclaimer- I don't own anything in this chapter except Kara and the words...and even then, Frank Sinatra gets the beautiful lyrics YOU get to listen to!

* * *

Kara looked at her watch, smiling as she noticed things going just according to plan

"Junior, stop it!" Wendy snapped.

Guiltily, Bowser Jr. pulled his chocolate-covered claws out of the chocolate fountain and stared at his older sister, letting the chocolate drip. "Why?"

"Because, you're embarrassing me!"

Junior smirked, dipping his entire face into the fountain.

"Junior! _Stop it_!" Wendy roared, smacking him so hard on his tipped head that Junior fell face-first into the chocolate.

"Weeeeendyyyy!" Junior whined, pulling his now brown head up and shaking like a dog. "What'd you do that for?"

"It's, like, bad enough that I have to stand this close to you little nitwit; I, like, don't want to look like I sympathize with the insane." She saw a young hammer brother march by, and immediately spun away from Junior and flashed a glittering smile.

"Maybe I don't _want_ you to stand by me," Junior taunted, "maybe _you_ make _me_ look bad."

Wendy looked her brother up-and-down, eyebrows raised in a questioning manner. "Yeah, I totally don't think you need my help." She sighed and grabbed the towels from the approaching waiter. "Clean up so I can like actually talk to you about our plan without puking."

The three of them tried to clean Junior, the young koopa prince mostly only being helpful as far as his tongue could reach. Before they were done, Wendy heard Larry's voice behind them. "Hey, you two. What's shakin?"

Junior lifted the towel suspiciously so he could better see. "Larry?"

"Yeah, it's me, slick! Who were you expecting?"

"I, like, thought you went to dance until Kammy came back."

"Well….obviously there was a change in plans. After all, I _am_ Larry Koopa, prince of the Darklands; I can do whatever I want. Because I'm _awesome_."

"Larry, are you okay?" Junior asked, scrutinizing his youngest older brother.

"Why wouldn't I be okay, slick? I'm _better_ than okay- I'm Larry!"

Wendy looked at the younger koopa suspiciously, eyeing his mischievous look in his eyes. Just above his Mohawk, she noticed _another_ Larry, dancing ridiculously amid the crowd. She narrowed her eyes, looking discreetly from the conceited Larry to the oblivious one.

Dancing Larry chanced a look over at his siblings, giving a huge double-take as he noticed his mirror-image standing with Junior and Wendy, chatting. Larry stopped dancing, throwing his partner off beat and she fell with a screech. Not bothering to apologize, Larry cautiously moved into earshot that his siblings were having with…well, Larry.

Wendy eyed him come closer, moving her attention back to the talkative Larry.

"Well," Junior began, scrutinizing Larry carefully, yet not even noticing the existence of the second Larry behind him. "You sound an awful lot like Roy."

"What? No, no, no, no, no!" Larry glared at them all, snarling, "I am Larry Koopa! I'm awesome! I'm the son of the king! I'm smart, I'm clever, and I have _amazing_ hair! Besides, Roy, my brother, is awful. He's rude, and he's conceited, and he has an accent. I do _not_ have an accent, because I'm Larry! And I'm not rude, conceited, or awful!"

Junior took a step back, raising his eyebrows. Wendy glanced at the second Larry, staring horrified and yet amused at the temper-tantrum his double was having. "Now you sound like more like Morton."

Wendy's lips turned up, putting the pieces together. Two Larrys, added with this Larry's memorable manner, and the solution should have been obvious. "No, Junior," she smirked, "he, like, doesn't sound like Roy. Or Morton. Or, like, even Larry. He sounds like _Doopliss_." She hissed out the name at the end, watching his eyes flash.

Behind the guilty-looking Larry, the eaves-dropping Larry tapped his shoulder. "Hey, Doopliss. What's up." Larry grinned into his own despairing face.

Doopliss-Larry shrugged his shoulder away from the koopaling, glaring at all three of them. "No, no, no, no, no!" He stamped his foot, a puff of blue smoke quickly enfolding him, dissipating to reveal the Duplighost with a blue party hat, guilty as charged. "Why'd you guys have to go and reveal me?" Doopliss pouted, poking Larry with his sheet-draped hand. "And _you're_ supposed to be dancing. You just blew my cover for the rest of the night."

Junior crossed his arms, teasing, "if you wanted to keep your cover, why'd you go and talk to _us_? You should know we're too much of smarties for you."

Doopliss rolled his eyes, grabbing a nearby pretzel and situating it under the chocolate fountain's flow. "Right, because you're _such _an Iggy or Ludwig, slick." Wendy held back bile as she watched him eat the pretzel, probably covered in chocolate she inadvertently helped her youngest brother contaminate. His mouth full, Doopliss continued, "I just wanted to talk to you guys. Haven't seen any of you for _years_, feels like."

"And whose fault is that?" Larry asked, trying to hide his pleasure at being rejoined with the Duplighost who had taught the koopalings a majority of their tricks. "Didn't Kamek ban you from the palace?"

Doopliss grinned. "Yeah, for turning all the kitchen appliances into chickens. That was a good one, thanks for reminding me!" He hunched down, urging the three koopalings into a huddle. "Keep it under wraps, but I'm trying to perfect that one. The chickens last time couldn't walk…they all had fork or spoons for feet. Even the blenders…go figure. Once it's good to go, I'm going to try at one of the soup kitchens in the inner-city."

"Hey," Junior shrieked, "didn't Kammy ban you, too?" He seemed to completely ignore Doopliss's scheme, as he didn't seem to have to hide any disgust at all. Wendy and Larry, on the hand, seemed caught between reverence and being horrified.

"Yeah, but that was a stupid reason. How was I supposed to know there's actually a law that says Duplighosts aren't allowed to imitate important dead kings and try and seize ultimate power in their name? It's as stupid a law as that one about replacing tile floors with Jell-O. Who in Darklands would even do that to make a law necessary?"

Junior blushed, avoiding eye contact.

"So then, _slick_, how did you, like, get in? If you're, like, banned and all…twice…"

Doopliss raised his arms high, dramatically. "We Duplighosts can sneak in anywhere, anytime. And 'Larry' doesn't _ever_ need a ticket."

"But, Doopy, you don't look like Larry no more. How you gonna make sure you don't get kicked out?"

"No one's going to kick me out now I'm here!"

From just a few feet away, Kammy hissed, "Wanna bet?" She slinked over to the group, fuming.

Once again, a cloud of blue smoke encircled Doopliss, leaving Kamek in his place. "Pretty good trick, eh, whippersnappers?" Kamek nervously muttered. He looked over at Kammy and faked surprise. "Oh, well, hello there, Kammy! I didn't see you standing there! I was just showing these youngin's the latest in imitation magic and-"

"Oh, shut _up_, Doopliss. You're banned for a reason…if you stick around for another second, I'll stuff you in the dungeon until that stupid hat of yours rots right off your head."

Kamek began wringing his hands, staring up at Kammy with a hopeful smile. "Doopliss? That charming young Duplighost? Hahaha, that's quite a compliment, but I assure you…I'm really Kamek. And I'm…old. And…smart. And a magikoopa."

"Is that so." Kammy drolled. Her eyes flashed. "You're coming with me, buddy."

Trying another tactic, Kamek grinned flirtatiously. "Well, now, Kammy! If you wanted to get me alone with you, you could have just asked. I've got plenty of _other_ magic tricks I can show you as long as you can last, sweety."

Furious, Kammy slapped Kamek, sending him to the ground. She shook with anger over him, wordless. Junior nudged Larry and whispered, "I think she thinks he really _is_ Kamek now. He's the only person she hates enough to slap."

Finally catching a hold of her tongue, Kammy pointed her wand at the fallen magikoopa, snarling a disenchantment at him. Smoke, this time purple, encircled Kamek, leaving a Doopliss shaking with fear.

"You know," Doopliss squeaked, under the wand of Kammy and well aware he was not only banned for a third time, but about to be arrested. "We duplighosts aren't just good at duplication…do you know what else we're good at, Kammy?"

"Annoying the heck out of everyone and getting themselves in line of death?"

"Besides that." Kammy glared, beginning to lean over to grab the duplighost's hands. "You're not gonna guess?"

"If you plan on changing into something so you can slip through my hands, you're out of luck. I suspend your magic as long as you're under my wand, buddy."

"Then it really is a shame you're not guessing, slick." Now that his mysterious plan was seemingly in action, Doopliss had lost all his terror and regained his annoying manner of conceit. "Because what we duplighosts are really good at?...It's called _running_."

Doopliss head-butted Kammy in the face, hopping up as she instinctively grabbed her hurt beak. Doopliss plucked her wand out of her hand and grinned, blue smoke encircling him yet again. In his place on the floor stood Ms. Mowz. She waved, squeaking, "Ta-ta!" and then, with blinding speed and a squeal, she took off.

Wendy watched jealously as Ms. Mowz sprinted away, tossing the wand into the air as she reached the door and slid out. Kammy was just beginning to regain her focus, shouting curses at the escapee, whilst Junior and Larry cheered Doopliss on his escape. "It's no fair!" Wendy cried, getting Larry's attention.

"What, you want to run away to? I thought you _liked_ these stupid things."

"I do," she snarled, looking longingly back where Ms. Mouz- Doopliss had just left. "It's just like, totally not fair. _No one_ can run that fast in stilettos!"

xxxx0o0o0o0o0o0o0xxxx

Kara looked at her watch, smiling as she noticed things going just according to plan. There had been a few minor set-backs, but now, at 11:52:07, things were going just according to plan.

She reviewed quickly the remainder of tasks on her clipboard…the koopalings had exactly 7 minutes and 8 seconds before Kammy was expected to lead them to bed. Then, at 12:30, the orchestra would change its tone and the lights would rise just a bit. At 12:45, the guests that didn't get the hint yet would be thanked for attendance by Kamek and Kara's other pre-approved 'dismissers'. She, herself, was then expected to leave. As the koopa custom, no matter how much the planner inside her hated it, Bowser and Peach _had_ to be the last people in the room.

The clipboard's seventy-fourth and seventy-fifth pages, as the last details of the itinerary, spanned the most time in the least amount of details. The ball was designed to seem to flow to an end, with no forced or abrupt changes, and as few as possible choreographed details. It killed Kara to not personally help it come to an expectable end, but on the other hand, it gave her a chance to breathe, knowing any problems were no longer her fault.

She glanced at her watch, then over at Kammy. Of course, the magikoopa was slacking, arguing with Kamek about something. She stormed over to her, an eye always on her watch. She snarled, "you have five minutes and forty-eight seconds to get those koopalings towards their bedrooms and out of this ballroom. Whatever you're arguing about is trite in comparison to your current duty."

Kammy glared up at the female hammer bro, tapping her red stiletto like a would-be dictator. "Oh ye of little faith," she muttered, pulling herself out of her seat and towards the various koopalings.

Kara redirected her attention on Kamek, watching Kammy leave dubiously. "You do know _your_ duty, right? I don't have to waste my precious time reminding _you_, right?"

Kamek smiled at Kara and nodded. "Relax, Kara. Enjoy yourself."

"Kamek, I don't think you understand the gravity of this ball. It's the one thing I'm hired for the entire year, and I don't want-"

"Kara, who is the ball for?"

Caught off-guard by Kamek's apparent disregard for Kara's speech, she stuttered, "His-his Nastiness, King Bowser."

"And, does King Bowser appear to be enjoying himself?"

Kara glanced over, watching Bowser show off a few of his break-dancing moves with Peach, trying to teach her the easiest ones to do in such an immobilizing dress. "That's not on the schedule!" She seethed, flipping through the pages to try and find the incriminating scheduled activity.

"Kara! Kara!" Kamek scolded, his wrinkled hand stopping her flipping fingers. "Answer my question."

Sighing, she looked back at the king. He was laughing with Peach, helping her up from a stumble. His face was glowing with euphoria as she bid him to continue the mini-lesson. "Yes…he does."

"Then it looks like you're doing your job just fine." His eyes twinkled, meeting Kara's uncertain gaze. "And yes, I do remember. 12:45. Approach any remaining guests and thank them for attending and wishing Bowser happiness on his birthday. Wish them safe travels home and good tidings for their families."

For one of the few times that night, Kara smiled.

xxxx0o0o0o0o0o0o0xxxx

Peach and Bowser rarely left each other's sides…or fronts, as dancing would have it. And as the night wore on, instead of growing eager to experience dancing with other members of the kingdom, Peach feared leaving Bowser even more. They monopolized their time, dancing with the eager citizens only while one got refreshments, went for air, or left for the bathroom. Peach had discovered she fit perfectly in Bowser's arms one certain position, and Bowser had learned his feet moved without his brain even directing them when the music allowed.

"You know," Peach said with a smirk as Bowser spun her for yet another waltz, "that shy-guy I danced with three dances ago told me I smell like you."

Bowser frowned. "Well, that's a shame."

Peach raised her eyebrows, placing her hands back into Bowser's as they circled and spun on the dance floor. "I'm a bit surprised you aren't pleased. I mean, that means that I've-"

"Oh, I know all the benefits of that," Bowser dismissed. "One, it means more people smell like me, which is always a good thing. And two, it means that I've got to hold you in my arms so much, other people's freaking _noses_ can tell we're supposed to be one unit. But what I'm getting at is that that means he doesn't get to smell how amazing you smell. But then again, maybe we're better off if I get to keep your scent as my secret."

Peach smiled. "I know another good thing that can come out of this," she muttered flirtatiously.

"Oh yeah?"

"Now I have a dress that smells like you."

"Peachy, you can get as many of _those_ as you want," Bowser replied with a smirk.

Unable of how to answer, Peach started to laugh. "This is a weird conversation, Bowser." She laughed again, continuing, "But I think I could probably talk about flying coconuts wearing bikinis with you and it wouldn't feel too weird."

"I'd just end up twisting it into some kind of flirting anyway," Bowser agreed, lifting Peach as the music decreed.

Peach floated back down into Bowser's arms like an angel. Softly, she said, "Bowser, we don't _flirt_. We talk and you lean towards the romantic side of the conversation. But we're not _flirting_."

"Says you," he muttered, grinning playfully.

Everyone eavesdropping around the royalties couldn't help but agree.

xxxx0o0o0o0o0o0o0xxxx

He had decided long ago that he was the happiest koopa in the room. If not the happiest koopa ever. The only thing that could ever raise Bowser's spirits was if Peach returned his love out-loud…or accepted a proposal…or kissed him…Okay, so maybe he wasn't the happiest koopa _possible_, but as Bowser danced the entire night with Peach, accepting her running-leaps when she was able to return to his arms, running his claws through her golden hair, feeling her tug on his arm every slow song, and catching her eye when she was off with someone else, he _knew_ he was the happiest koopa in the room.

Bowser looked around to reaffirm his decision and realized he was _definitely_ the happiest koopa in the room…he was also the only one. The waiters and chefs were moving the food back into the kitchen as to not spoil overnight, and besides them, there were only two goombas finishing their dessert as they walked towards the door in the whole ballroom.

"It's almost the Last Dance," Bowser muttered, a wave of nostalgia making his voice sweet and serene.

"What did you say?" Peach asked, looking back into his face as they spun.

"The Last Dance. They always wait until the guests of honor are the only people left and then they play the same song every birthday ball. My dad always used to sing it to my mom while they danced…and after they died and Clawdia and I were alone for the dance, I never liked it. But this year…" Bowser softly caressed Peach's cheek with his claw. "This year, I think I understand why my dad sang it."

"Are the words any good?"

Bowser chuckled. "They're really cheesy. And kind of stupid." Bowser looked into Peach's brilliant blue eyes, as she had pulled her head off his chest. "But falling in love makes me realize why people sing love songs in the first place, and the words sound really good."

"Bowser…" Peach cooed, her heart pattering at his flirt. He grinned back at her and they continued their waltz. Peach knew she shouldn't want this at all, but she couldn't help but imagine her and Bowser in their parents place. After all, they…they practically were. Just they weren't married and she wasn't a koopa. The rest was pretty much there..._and I don't love him…that too_, Peach mentally added, almost scolding herself for forgetting.

"Would you sing the words to me?" Peach asked, innocently.

Bowser gulped. "Sing?" He took a hand off his princess and scratched the back of his neck. "Peach, I can't-"

"I thought you said you knew the words, though!"

"I do," Bowser squeaked, his voice almost cracking, "But I can't…I can't sing. Peach, I'm tone-deaf."

"Nonsense," Peach reprimanded, "you're just embarrassed."

"No, really. I even had Ludwig test me."

Peach bit her lip. "Oh. Okay. That's fine." It was a silly wish, anyway. Why should they repeat Bowser's parents at all? They had no reason to…_nothing _in common…

Bowser gulped again, watching Peach's disappointment with distress. "But…I know it really well…I can _try_ I guess."

"You will?" Peach asked, her eyes lighting up and dismissing her justifications.

"I just don't want to hurt your ears, Peachy."

Peach smiled at his worry, but couldn't imagine Bowser being tone-deaf. His scratchy, low voice could only sound better on moving pitches. He practically sang when he said he loved her, and his laugh had a ringing quality. "I'm sure there's no way that could happen."

Bowser forced a laugh, and glanced over at the buffet table. It was completely void of people now; the waiters had left as well. He moved his eyes to the two remaining goombas, thankfully still eating and chattering. Any other year and he would beg them to leave so he could go to bed, but another minute with Peach…and another minute he was farther from singing…was a blessed minute indeed.

They danced, moving as one, while Peach asked about the various murals on the wall. Bowser answered her questions abruptly, sometimes not even hearing the question at all. Peach sighed. "What's wrong _now_, Bowser?"

"Nothing," he curtly replied, his eyes glued on the goombas as they slowly rose from their chairs.

Peach followed his eyes and sighed. "Are you worried about that song I want you to sing?"

"Of course not!" Bowser squeaked, spinning Peach so she couldn't watch the goombas. "I'm _never_ worried."

"Okay then…why are you so concerned?" Bowser bit his lip, staring down at Peach. "I already told you I don't care how good _or_ bad your voice sounds."

"Then why do you care if I sing?"

"Because," Peach started to blush, looking away from Bowser's face. "I want to hear the words. You said they're good."

"They are!" Bowser agreed, continuing, "I always thought they were so cheesy and so stupid and that my dad was just trying to get Mom to be happy. But whoever wrote it knew what this must feel like…this love thing…because they're words I want you to hear." Bowser swallowed, softly admitting, "I just don't want to ruin them."

Peach felt her heart climb into her throat, somehow still caught off guard by Bowser's sweet comments. "I'm sure it'll make them even better with you singing," she managed to whisper.

Noticing the goombas chattering as they stepped through the doorframe, Bowser muttered, "well you won't have to wait long."

()Just as Bowser expected, as the goombas stepped out, Ludwig's band took a change in tempo, an impressive clarinet taking the main theme. Bowser gulped, thinking _here goes nothing_ in his head as he touched Peach's face. "It's the last dance, we've come to the last dance; they're dimming the lights down, they're hoping we'll go…"

Peach giggled at Bowser's cracking, off-note voice, but let him continue, "it's obvious- they're aware of us, the pair of us, alone on the floor. Still, I want to hold you like this…" Bowser tightened his loving grasp, "forever and more."

Peach smiled, snuggling closer, and Bowser grew more confident. "It's the last song, they're playing the last song, the orchestra's yawning, they're sleepy I know…They're wondering just when will we leave, but till we leave, keep holding me tight." Bowser gulped, coming in a bit late on his next phrase, "Through the last dance, each beat of the last dance; save me the first dance in your dreams tonight."

The music swelled majestically, led by the clarinet solo, as Bowser and Peach spun. She spun with Bowser around the empty ballroom, letting herself lean back and feel her hair spin. They floated across the parquet, no need for a spotlight, and seemed to dance in a very dream. Every word she took to heart, understanding how ridiculously perfect they seemed to fit what the both of them felt. Bowser grinned down at Peach, proud that she seemed to be enjoying the dance as much as him; if that was even possible.

He began again, "They're wondering…just when will we leave, but till we leave, keep holding me tight…" He slowed them down as he took Peach into his arms closer, "Through the last dance, each beat of the last dance…"

Quietly, Peach joined in, her pitch-perfect soprano mingling with sweet dissonance to Bowser's off-key bass, "and save me the first dance in your dreams…tonight."

Peach giggled, noticing she had started singing 'tonight' far earlier than the song called for. Bowser looked down at her, grinning, as he remembered her beautiful voice. Peach smiled up at Bowser as they stopped dancing. "Thank you," she whispered, meaning a lot more than just her private serenade session.

Ludwig's orchestra was silent, and chairs began to scrape as the members prepared to leave. They could hear Bowser's oldest son's voice ever-so faintly telling them whatever it was he felt they needed to hear, but they ignored everything around them. "I love you. So much," Bowser stated, playing with Peach's fingers.

"I know you do," Peach replied, smiling smugly.

Bowser kept one hand with Peach's and looked over at the large doors, seeming to be leering at them. "I'll…I'll walk you to your bedroom," Bowser sighed, disappointed the night was over.

They began their slow walk through the hallways, choosing to take only elevators as shortcuts and ignoring the koopacars all together. Their hands were connected only by entwined pinkies, and their conversation circled the very long day.

It seemed impossible that just that morning, they had had breakfast with the whole royal family in Bowser's bedroom, or that that very afternoon they had opened gifts. It all seemed so very long ago…like the one day had lasted a whole year. Bowser and Peach didn't reach Peach's bedroom uninterrupted, however, as they were only half way there when they heard a voice calling after them.

"King Dad! Mama Peach!" Bowser and Peach turned around to see Lemmy, leaning out of a corridor, waving frantically.

"Lemmy, what is it?" Bowser growled.

"I just wanted to say hi!" Lemmy answered jovially, running out of his bedroom in his pajamas and towards Bowser and Peach.

"Then hi-" Bowser gruffly began, cut off by Lemmy's whomp of a hug. "What are you doing?" Bowser asked, his arms high above his son.

"Hugging you!" Lemmy answered, looking up at his dad. "Mama Peach taught it to me." Peach looked at Lemmy curiously. Yeah, she'd hugged him…and the other koopalings…but did they really not know what a hug was before she came?

"Oh," Bowser answered softly, easing his arms down to embrace his son. "Then…I guess it's cool."

Lemmy squirmed out of his father's hold and rushed into Peach's arms. She lifted him a bit, giving him a proper squeeze; easier, now that Lemmy's shell was off for the night. "We haven't seen you all day, Lemmy!"

"I know," he answered dully, letting Peach set him down. "Today was crazy, huh, King Dad? Your birthday's always crazy but today was even crazier, I think. Oh, guess what, King Dad!"

"Lemmy, you really should be in bed…you're lucky I'm in a good mood, otherwise you'd be cleaning the dungeons tomorrow."

"You didn't guess, King Daddy!"

Bowser rolled his eyes. "What is it?"

"I blew fire today!"

Bowser's eyes snapped open, his face lighting up like a light bulb. "You did?" Coughing, he corrected, "I mean, about time."

"I did, King Dad, I did! Wanna see?"

"I've _seen_ fire before, Lemmy," Bowser drawled, trying to keep his voice slow and cool. "But whatever. Don't waste my time _talking_ about it; let's see some action."

Lemmy stood in one place, his eyes moving up in his head as he mumbled, thinking out loud. "Think hard…let your throat heat up…think hard…" finally, Lemmy inhaled dramatically and blew a flame, large enough to make Peach squeal and squeeze Bowser's hand, but it extinguished as quickly as it had appeared. Lemmy looked at his father, absolutely beaming.

Peach as well turned her attention to Bowser. She felt a little flop of her heart as she inspected his expression…his eyes were glowing with pride and his mouth had the undeniable evidence of an attempt to swallow a smile. "Took you long enough to learn, Lemster," Bowser said. He ruffled Lemmy's rainbow mohawk affectionately, grumbling, "but I'm proud of you."

Peach smiled down at the grinning koopaling. "That was really cool, Lemmy. Soon, you'll be able to blow as much fire as your dad can!"

"Hey now, don't go crazy!" Bowser jokingly remarked.

"You think so, Mama Peach?" Lemmy asked genuinely, his eyes brimming with hope.

Peach felt a maternal pull towards the koopaling as he called her nickname with adoration. True, she wasn't _any_ of the koopalings mothers, and Lemmy wasn't even young enough to actually ever mistake her for such, but she almost felt like she was _supposed_ to be their Mama Peach, like it was right. And, guiltily, it made her feel more like her strange new pull towards Bowser was the right thing. She tried to forget that her feelings…as well as the feelings of those around her and their very lives…were real, and not just pieces in a complicated game of house.

"Yes, Lemmy, I do." Peach smiled, adding, "it'll take a few years, but if you practice like your dad does, I'm sure it can happen."

Bowser looked at Peach, feeling so helplessly in love and adoring of her nature. For a minute, he forgot that they weren't married, that she wasn't the mother of his children, and that she was going home in two days. For a minute, he felt complete. "Your mother's right, Lemster. Just keep trying…you might never be _quite_ as good as me, nobody will be, but you'll get pretty darn close." He flashed Peach a grin, hoping for her approval. She caught his eye and nodded, proud and a bit flustered by his additional search for approval. She didn't even notice her given title.

Peach bent down and ushered Lemmy towards his bedroom. "Go back to bed, Lemmy. You should be asleep."

"Okay, Mama Peach. G'night, Mama Peach! G'night, King Dad!" Bowser watched Lemmy leave, and when he heard the door shut, he chuckled, still looking away from Peach.

"He's a good kid. Definitely stupider than most of my kids, but he's good. Sometimes, I think he doesn't understand the whole 'love-being-mean' thing that koopalings are _supposed_ to act like, but…for him, it works." He turned to Peach, smirking, and noticed her expression had a faint smile and distant eyes. "What is it?"

Snapping out of her funk, Peach answered, "nothing, nothing…I was jut thinking…you're a pretty good Dad." Taken aback, Bowser didn't really respond. "I mean, you're no father of the year, but…your kids respect you more than most children respect both their parents combined. And you've got that weird way of loving them that only really works in your family...you might never admit you love them, but I think they can tell." Peach's smile faded a bit as she continued, "I think you're probably a better father than mine is."

"You don't talk about him much," Bowser replied, starting to walk down the hallway again with Peach.

"I know I don't…he's not a bad guy at all. He's a very good king, as anti-publicity as he is. But I was raised by Toadsworth and it feels like the only way anyone knows he's my father is because I'm Princess. I see him less than the public does…he shows up when I'm kidnapped to take my place in legislation, but he's gone before I can even say hello. I guess what I'm saying is I wouldn't exactly run out of my bedroom to say hi as he walked by at some ungodly hour with a girl."

Bowser was quiet for a little bit. "My parents were okay, I guess. My mom was always too over-bearing and lovey-dovey. Every day it was 'Bowsy this' and 'Bowsy that' and 'come eat your cookies, sugar!' or 'You're such a smarty, Bow-Wow! Keep up the good work'. It was embarrassing, like I was never going to grow up. And yet, I almost never saw eye-to-eye with her, and it was always pretty annoying that she loved me to bits when I was being a good kid, but the second I had an opinion of my own…like marrying you…I was the bad guy and she had to squash my opinion as soon as possible. When I got older I realized Evil Mom was usually more real than Nice Mom, so I decided I wouldn't trick my kids into thinking they were little gods who could all rule the world and then treat them like ratty old plumbers when we disagreed.

"My dad though…he was only around to yell at me in the first place. He was always off taking over some new territory, prancing around the kingdom, or shutting up retarded dignitaries. He only ever joined the family to take pictures and yell at his kids. Apparently, he was a good guy. Mom sure liked him. And when they were together, I understood why they wanted me to follow through with the arranged marriage. But he never let me see that. Ever. I guess I wanted to be the father mine never was, and make up for all the mistakes I saw in Mom. But it's hard being both parents…I know why my dad was the way he was, for sure. And no matter how hard I try, I'm not a mom."

"Well," Peach muttered, smiling up at Bowser. "You're doing a fine job."

"It's nice to have help every once in a while," Bowser quietly replied. "The koopalings haven't been as happy as they have this week for years. Neither have I."

"Being Mama Peach isn't too bad," Peach answered with a smile. "You guys make it seem easy."

"What about being Mrs. Bowser?" Bowser flirtatiously asked, grabbing her around the waist.

"Bowser!" She laughed, fighting to get out of his arms. Her cheeks were a furious red, and she tried to hide the blush as she faced her door. "I have to go to bed now."

His eyebrows were a mile high as he pointed out, "You didn't answer my question!"

"I shouldn't _have_ to. You know the answer!" She opened her door and went in, standing in the open doorframe.

"You love it so much you want to marry me now?" Bowser asked, sincere hope shining in his eyes.

Peach bit her lip and looked down. "No, not exactly. I like spending time here, but…Bowser, you know I don't…I don't love you." The words were forced, and hurt her to say them. It hurt her to say it, just like it hurt her to lie.

Bowser sighed. "Yeah…I guess. I'm just trying to be optimistic."

Her face lit up again. She was determined to not let the conversation kill her evening. "But I _do_ love _that_. It's a reason why I…like you…a lot more than I used to."

"And you know I love you, right?" Bowser asked, frantically.

Peach laughed. "I don't think I'm likely to forget anytime soon, Bowser. Don't worry." She smiled and took his hand one last time. "I know you love me just as much as I know the sun's coming up tomorrow."

Bowser grinned. "Good. And speaking of tomorrow…I'm gonna come pick you up at eight for breakfast. Then we'll head to town. I'm excited."

"Me too!" Peach smiled. "If it's half as good as today, I won't wanna go home!"

"Then I'll make sure it's even better!" Bowser practically shouted. Then, in an undertone added, "but it better not be as long."

Peach laughed. "If it's better than today, I don't think I'll mind it being long. But if it's going to be, I'd better get to bed right now…you too!"

Bowser sighed, grumbling like a child, "alright, fine." He slumped his shoulders and began to stalk off before Peach caught him.

"Bowser, wait." The koopa king obediently turned around, grinning hopefully. From her doorway, Peach sweetly sang, "Save me the first dance in your dreams tonight."

* * *

**Author's Note: **Are you relieved the ball's over? ;) It's weird, being done with the ball. I nodded to it quite a few times...best example is Kara's notes of 75 pages? That's how many pages on word this ball comes to. D: JUST THE BALL. Also, any remarks about the day being a year long...yet another nod at how CRAZY this ball is. I knew it would take awhile, as the ball is the climax (except for the conclusion, but shh) but seriously. I went crazy, I think.

As I said, I'm only half-way through (if that!) 30, so I really don't have much to say about it at all...um...I'm hoping it's good? I honestly don't even know if there'll be fluff, BUT there will be a reprise of a few characters we haven't seen in awhile, so that's always fun. :)

Guys, did you notice I have over 500 reviews? THAT'S CRAZY. NO JOKE. And as a gift to the lovely Deanna625, a LONG time reader who landed review 500, she has a request that will be showing up next chapter. I think I'm a bit in denial I ACTUALLY hit 500...I already told y'all how I thought I would get max 17 reviews, right? Yeah. Not a joke. I'm still boggled how you guys like it this much...but I love you all so much for it! Every one of you makes my day by merely existing!

Now I think I have a longer A/N than I really should...sorry about that!

-Razzi


	30. Another Good Morning

**Foreword: **LOOK I finally updated. :) I don't even have a word of 31 typed, but I was SO BEHIND I wanted to let you all know I haven't abandoned CoH. Don't plan on it, either.

This chapter starts out Friday, a day that I've been looking forward to for A LONG TIME. It's not as excellent as Thursday, but it's probably second...so I hope it starts on a good note. Friday also means we're meeting up with Mario again. He's actually a reason it took so long- I literally forgot how to write those guys! Took awhile to remember...hahaha. Also includes a scene for Deanna625, my 500th review-giver (YEESH THAT'S STILL CRAZY TO ME). That scene is putting everyone's favorite part of the update (the disclaimer, bien sur!) at the end.

* * *

Her alarm had only been beeping for a few seconds when Peach was already hopped out of bed and turning it off. She supposed that she _should_ be exhausted…she danced all evening and then through all her dreams…but instead, she seemed filled with enthusiasm. She grinned at the clock, reading 5:30. Yeah, two and a half hours were about two hours more than she needed to get ready for the day, but she wanted to be _perfect_ and absolutely ready when Bowser came to get her at eight.

She hummed lightly as she pranced into the bathroom, turning on her shower and dropping her pajamas. She stepped out of the silky puddle at her feet and into the warm shower…when central heating is a volcano's molten center, the water doesn't take long to heat up.

Washing herself luxuriously, Peach couldn't help but sing. She was so excited for the day, so elated from the day before, and the acoustics were _so good_! She lathered up her long, blonde hair, letting it fall back and detangle from the effects of the magic shampoo. She never would have guessed that a koopa palace had such fantastic hair shampoo, but one look at Bell's voluminous hair or one sweep through Bowser's feather-soft mane and it was much easier to understand.

Feeling relaxed and completely cleansed after her longer-than-usual shower, Peach pulled down the towel from hanging over the steamy door. She wrapped it around her person, cuddling in the long, baby-soft fabric and opened the door. She walked to the mirror, wiping a circle of steam away with her hand, and saw a face grinning back at her from the wall.

Peach shrieked, gripping her towel tightly with one hand and bracing against the vanity with another as she turned about. There on the wall was that same blue spider from her first day, his golden grin fading as she yelped. He looked over at her, waiting for her to calm down. "Whatchu doin' in here, mees?"

Peach took deep breaths, pulling her towel up a little higher as she looked over at the spider. "What…what are you _talking_ about? What are _you_ doing in _here?_"

"I'm here to geev you a note, mees! Boot yer not s'posed to be in _here_, mees. Yer supposed to bees sleepen."

"I…I woke up early."

"I ken see that, mees!" The spider answered, straining his eyes at her. "Eet's far too early for a mees lak yerself to be up an' aboot! How'm I s'posed to deliver ze note eef yer not sleepen in yer bed?"

"You didn't have to come in here like some sort of…peeping Tom."

The spider stared at Peach, confused. "Mah nem's not Tom! Who told yu eet was?"

"No one did…It's an expression. Um…I'd love to read your note, but I don't feel…comfortable with you here while I'm…" Peach looked down at her towel, then up at the spider. His face was blank and not getting the hint. "Indisposed." She finished, waiting for the spider to scurry away.

"Mees, I'm afred I don't know whatchu jest sed. Kin you use eenglish?"

Peach smiled, laughing a bit. "I don't want to talk when I'm wearing nothing but a towel."

"What does zat have to do wif anything, mees? I's not wearing anyting eezer!"

Peach smiled again, tempted to pat the spider's head, but not willing to budge an inch, no matter how large the towel was. "It's a bit different for humans."

The spider's eye began to twitch as he thought. Suddenly, his face lit up. "Ohhhh! I zink I git eet. Is zat why yous alwez be wearin' clothes, mees? Zat big pink dress o' yours?"

"Yes, yes, that's why. So…if you wouldn't mind…I'd like to put something on before I read this note of yours."

"Okay!" The spider answered, chirpily, watching Peach stand awkwardly. Yet another realization dawned on him as he narrowed his eyes and asked, "did that mean yu want me tu leave so yous kin dress? And yu kin read the note when your all feeneeshed?"

"That's exactly what I meant."

The spider tipped his forelegs towards Peach, saying, "Gotcha." He scurried down the wall and under the door into Peach's room, leaving her alone in the bathroom.

Now alone, Peach began to wonder what was in the note. She picked up her outfit she had chosen for the day and smiled. It was her classic dress, but lighter petticoats with a paler pink tone. She hummed a little, contemplating the mysterious note (almost definitely from Bowser) as she began putting on her underwear. She clipped the bra on, ruffling for her soft and light chemise and slip and adjusting them perfectly. It would be horrible to have to have her corset and crinoline pinned against her skin without them.

What did Bowser need to send her a note for? Peach contemplated possibilities as she fit into her corset. She picked at the lacing, finally crossing her arms and pulling tight before tying it in a bow. After years of working with toad maids and convincing them that breathing was a necessity for a Princess, she had finally gotten to the point where she didn't need help putting it on. But that didn't mean it didn't take long enough!

She walked around, pleased the spider had left her alone as the chemise didn't cover nearly enough for her ideals, and after a bit of wrestling with the dress hoops, finally got the crinoline ready to put on. It took her another fives minutes of wrestling with the crinoline, as small as it was, before she finally managed to get it over her head and resting on her hips. A bit out of breath, she was possibly thinking too hard about the note, as when Peach tried to snap the crinoline's snaps in place, it sprung up towards her face.

She squealed, falling backwards, glad that she didn't have her dress on completely. _That hasn't happened in a while_…Peach supposed being so preoccupied while dressing was as dangerous as it was while driving. Once she calmed down and found her petticoats, she was almost done. The skirts were on, hanging a few inches off her skin, and she bent down nicely to pick up the pale pink dress. With a bit of effort and grunting, Peach got it successfully over her head and adjusted it until the brooch, the fabric, and the sleeves were all the right way.

Smiling, Peach twirled at her reflection. Her makeup wasn't on, her hair was wet and flat, and her gloves were in the other room, but otherwise, she looked just fine. Of course, she intended on taking just as much tender care on the rest of the day's appearance as she had getting dressed.

The letter was all hers, as soon as Peach crossed the threshold into her bedroom. She held the door handle and began to turn, but stopped cold when she realized…her television was on. _I wasn't watching TV earlier…_she worried, slowly easing the door open, ready to scream for help if needs be.

Yet on her bed was the completely harmless spider, who evidently hadn't gotten the message to leave.

Peach swung the door wide open, thrusting her free hand on her hip. "Why are you still here? Shouldn't you have left already?"

The spider turned from his engrossing television show to Peach. "'Ey, you's be in yoor dress now!"

"Yes…yes, I am. But you didn't answer my question!"

"Why didn't I leave?" The spider repeated, his face towards Peach, but his eyes locked on the television. "Er…well…why would I du zat?"

"Because," Peach began to answer as she walked over to the spider on her bed, "it takes me a long time to get dressed. And I'm pretty sure you don't have to supervise me reading the note."

The spider was silent, a grin itching the corners of his cheek as he ignored Peach and watched the television. Finally, he replied with a resounding "YIS! YIIIIISS!" He thrust his little blue front limbs towards the TV and turned to Peach, his face lit up. "Didju see that, mees? Didju?" His grin was so wide, each of his remaining teeth; white, tan, and gold; stood out for Peach to see. Sighing, Peach looked over at the screen. A shy guy in a striped referee outfit stood next to an oversized hawk in a gladiator suit, both yelling something incoherent as the crowd screamed over them. "Rawk Hawk just beet the last fool aginst him for champ title!"

The clubba on the ground looked more than slightly dazed as his trainer rushed with the medics to take him out of the arena. "Is this wrestling? Why is wresting on so early?"

The spider stared up at Peach incredulously. "No, mees! Zis ees the Glitz Pit! No _ress'ling_. And zees was yeers ago anyway. Zat's why it's on so early, mees."

Peach raised an eyebrow at the spider, poking him lightly. "So, you sat around watching an old wrestling match from years ago while I got dressed instead of leaving the note on my bed like you were going to if I was asleep anyway?"

The spider began to shake his head. "Mees, mees, mees. Does Rawk Hawk _look_ like a ress'ler?" He pointed at the champion, now strutting around the arena with his big belt, and began to explain the differences between the Glitz Pit and a wrestling match.

"I'm sorry…I'm sure this is fascinating…but can I have my note?" Peach interrupted.

The spider grinned. "Yeah, I giss that would be a good thing fer you to have, eh?" He scurried off the bed and over towards a small messenger bag near the door. The spider all but disappeared as he buried himself, looking for the note. He emerged triumphant, dashing like a madman with the note billowing above his head. "Here y'are, mees! Eet's from 'is Majesty…'is Majesty ees very fond 'o you, mees."

Peach smiled, saying, "I know," as she plucked the note from the spider's forelegs. She opened it up and read, _Milk. Egs. Moskeeto Nuggets. Lite bulbs. Capten Crunchys Cornflakes. Extra thred. 8 redd socks. Bumble Bee Tuthpast._ Peach rolled her eyes and wove the list at the spider. "Are you _sure_ this is the note Bowser wrote to me?"

"Yiss!" The spider answered, crawling over and pulling the paper down to his height. He skimmed it. "Oh. No. Zat's fer me," his blue face turned a reddish hue as he plucked the list out of Peach's hands. "Meesus will naught be happy eef I ferget to go teh the store agin, 'fyou know what I meen." He quickly got Peach the correct note and handed it to her.

She read, _Hey Peach, this is Bowser. I wasn't supposed to have any meetings today but Kamek told me that I couldn't skip the one at 8 cause theyll be talking about how we can go in town without getting bothered today. Its supposed to be a short meeting but I wont be able to come get you at 8 like I sed I would. Sorry. I still love you a lot. Im going to be at brekfest so I'l see you there. Hit my kids if they get annoying cause there gonna be at brekfest before me. I love you. Love, Bowser. _

Peach smiled at the note, rereading it again, and lingering on his repetitious last lines. She felt mild disappointment she wouldn't see him at breakfast, but for the most part, she couldn't get that stupid smirk off her face. Bowser's handwriting was absolutely horrible, but it was obvious he had tried to make it look good; he had went so slow, he had actually tore the paper in some places with the pen. That didn't help his spelling, but Peach didn't mind at all.

xxxx0o0o0o0o0o0o0xxxx

Mario chuckled at Luigi, batting at his tongue, burnt from the coffee. He took another heaping bite of his spaghetti and chewed, amused at Luigi's frantic expression.

Once the younger twin calmed town, he pointed his cereal spoon at Mario. "And-a _why_ are you-a eating spaghetti for break-a-fast again?"

"_Because_ I-a can." Mario smiled smugly, swallowing before continuing, "Meredith offered! She knows I-a love spaghetti, so sha-a made some special."

Luigi spied over Mario's shoulder, catching sight of the inn help in discussion. She was looking back at Mario while he talked about her, looking very pleased. "Well," Luigi sighed, "That's-a very nice of-a her."

Catching sight of Daisy on the stairs, Luigi's attention was diverted. She was wearing just a simple yellow tank-top with jeans, and her curls were bouncing as she ran down the stairs. She quickly came over to the boys and sat right down. "Good morning!" She chirped, looking from brother to brother. Luigi smiled back, and Mario looked up from his spaghetti and just stared at Daisy, trying to slurp up as much pasta as he could. "Mario…why are you eating _spaghetti?_"

"We just-a went through this," Luigi commented, shaking his head in exasperation. "_Meredith _brought it. _That's-a_ why he's-a eating it."

"Ooooh, I see. I see how it is," Daisy teased, raising an eyebrow at Mario. "Is that why he's being more of a morning person today, too?" She walked her ungloved fingers onto Mario's arm and up it. "Sweety McSweets is trying to butter you up with her pasta of _looove_?"

Mario pulled his arm away, glaring at the princess. "That-a is _not_ what the pasta is-a for!" He lifted the plate off the table as if keeping it away from Daisy's infectious teasing, all the while forking more into his face.

"Well then," she teased, pulling an expression of fear and concern. "She must be fattening you up! Perhaps she's really a witch, hungry for her next victim, and you've caught her eye. I bet this gem-business is all just a façade! _Meredith_ is the mastermind, luring us here to feed you with her carb-loaded pasta to make you the ideal candidate for her cannibalistic witch tendencies! She probably even poisoned our coffee to make sure we don't fight back."

Mario glared at Daisy, shouting, "You're absolute-a-ly crazy!" Luigi stared at Daisy in similar shock, his face paling over his lifted mug of coffee.

"If you don't believe me," Daisy pouted, "I'll just _ask_ her! Meredith!" Immediately, Mario began to reach towards Daisy, leaning over the table and flailing in attempt to cover her mouth. Daisy laughed as she leaned farther away from the fat plumber, calling, "Meredith! Oh, Meredith!"

The inn help with streaked blonde hair walked over curiously, staring down at the odd group. Mario was stretched across the table, his arms held tight by Daisy, who was just laughing. Luigi was sitting with his coffee, staring up at Meredith with a bit of dubious fear. "…yes?" she asked, watching curiously as Mario fell back into his seat, brushing off the spaghetti he had unwittingly thrust himself into off his overalls. The stain remained; no matter how much Mario brushed at it, the stain was as red as his face.

Daisy cocked an eyebrow with a half smile, about to speak when the light streaming from the windows suddenly went black; as if darkness was streaming in instead.

Quietly enough that Daisy almost missed it among the shouts and screeches of shock from patrons, Meredith muttered, "That's weird. It's supposed to be clear, bright skies today." The room continued to darken, and the patrons got louder and louder.

"Luigi, what's going on?" Daisy asked, trying to keep her voice steady as she practically yelled. Unfortunately, Luigi's only answer was his muttering incoherencies in terror.

The room was now completely black. The table of four could hear other patrons yelling, tripping, crying…no one knew what was going on. "I-a have a flashlight!" Mario shouted joyously, digging around blindly for his plumbers light. With a click, a beam of light flashed out of the small, red flashlight. But just as it had with the rest of the room, the darkness soon consumed the light. It was as dark as it was before.

"The batteries must have run out," Meredith offered, unwilling to believe anything else could be happening.

"Don't be stupid!" Daisy snapped. "Something's _wrong_ here, and we all know it. Mario's flashlight _doesn't_ need batteries, there isn't cloud cover, and we haven't all gone blind. _Something_ is behind this, and until we figure out what it is, everyone just needs to shut up and…stick…oh, my." Slowly, but surely, light started to return to the room. It was strangely flooding in from one side of the room…the side without any windows or light. Soon, the room was enveloped in as much light as it had been moments before, and Mario's flashlight was beaming uselessly onto the table.

"That was-a certainly…"

"A-weird-a." Luigi finished for his brother. The group looked around, Meredith walking towards the empty bar where the light had started returning at, searching for an explanation.

Daisy noticed everyone gathering their things, speaking in hushed voices of varying suspicions and guesses at what had just happened. She opened her mouth to voice her own, but was cut off by a shrill, "Princess Daisy!"

Madame Clearmont came pushing through the crowds towards them, running her fingers through her frizzled hair as she got closer. "Daisy, do you know what just happened?"

"No, we were hoping you did…"

The old mother sighed, wringing her hands as she looked around. "Mario, Luigi, please draw the blinds." The plumbers looked at her questioningly, but she just snapped, "Draw the blinds, gentlemen! Make sure not a single beam of light can get through."

As the brothers left to close the blinds, she hollered to Meredith, "close the shutters after them, Meredith."

"Madame Clearmont…what's going on?" Daisy asked, watching the crowd grow more anxious as the light from outside began to leave again; this time from the followed orders of their host.

"Do you have the gems with you, Daisy?" Mme Clearmont asked under her breath.

"What do they have to do with any-"

"_Do you have the gems?_" she repeated.

A bit taken aback, Daisy pulled her purse into her hands and opened it to look for the gems. "Uh, yeah…they're right-"

"Don't pull them out, stupid girl!" Madame Clearmont shrieked. Apologetically, she patted Daisy's hands, adding, "I'm sorry about snapping…but you _mustn't take them out_…not while the light can still get in through the windows!"

Mario, Luigi, and Meredith were almost completely finished shutting out the light; there were only a few beams here and there that escaped into the room at all. "Madame," Daisy addressed, "do you really think anyone could see what we're doing from outside?"

"That's not what I'm worried about, dear princess. As good as your intentions are…we are in very real danger. And as it is the fault of you and your company, I expect you to handle the danger _without_ placing my customers in harm's way. You've done a foul job thus far."

"I don't even know what you're talking about!" Daisy cried. "If we attract any villains at all because of these "all-powerful" gems, they'll be ones retarded enough to go to a corporation of bad guys anyone can find in the public phonebook!"

Madame Clearmont was shaking, her frizzled hair seeming to take life of its own. "It doesn't matter how intelligent the interested parties are; the fact that they _are_ interested in gems that could possibly destroy two entire universes should be proof enough that they're too evil to let around folk like my customers."

"What I don't understand, Madame, is why you would let us do this in the first place if you're so strongly against it."

"I didn't realize until now the kind of forces we're up against. Go tell your plumbers to seal the windows better. I don't want a single shred of light coming in out of those things."

xxxx0o0o0o0o0o0o0xxxx

"Larry, come _on!_ We're going to be late to breakfast!" Iggy shouted, pulling his younger brother along as he tore down hallways.

"It's not _my_ fault that your stupid little experiment blew up and you felt like you should clean it up. You should have just realized the janitors can do it in the first place, instead of wasting thirty minutes clearing the smoke then leaving the rest of the mess _all over_."

"Cleaning up wasn't the problem in the first place, Larry! I just realized that even if the janitors take care of the mess, Kamek is going to notice fifteen megasnarks of kooltonic acid- bicorbongoombate is missing! It's better to just get out of there…but we couldn't let the fumes get to Kamek before we do."

Larry stopped in his tracks, making his older brother trip over his own flailing feet. "You broke _Kamek's_ experiment?"

"Well, yeah, that's why we had to clean it up. Come _on!_ We can't be late! It'll be suspici-"

"Iggy! We have to find a koopajanitor! There's probably some kooltonic acid still on the floor, carving our footprints right into the tile…we don't know how to clean it up well enough for Kamek to not notice!"

"And the janitorial staff _do?_" Iggy snarled, tugging his brother along again. "We're doomed no matter if we get janitors to help or not; best we get in that dining room under the radar."

"No, no, Iggy! They train koopajanitors to clean up all that stuff. If we find one, we could get it sanitized just like _magic_."

Iggy stopped pulling, mulling over the idea. He looked at Larry through his thick glasses, his eyes already wide. "I forgot about that. That's…actually a good idea. But it's not like we'll see any koopajanitors just hanging out in the hallway. They're all supposed to be working right now…and we're supposed to be at breakfast!"

As they rounded a corner, Larry spotted a tall, dark-looking koopa down the hall, "MAITENENCE" stamped across the back of his shell. "Look, Iggy! I found one!"

"You _did_? After the _first corner_?" Iggy peered around the corner with Larry, and sure enough, there was a koopajanitor. He held a mop in his hands, but seemed only interested in glaring at the koopatrol down the hall, guarding his bathroom door uneasily. Iggy sighed, and walked over to the janitor with his brother. "Excuse me?"

"Shh," the koopajanitor hissed. "I'm busy."

"You don't look very busy," Iggy commented.

The koopajanitor glared and spoke through his teeth, as if wanting the koopatrol down the hall to not notice. "I'm _obviously_ busy. I'm mopping." The koopajanitor swished the mop around, splashing the feet of both Larry and Iggy.

Larry glared at his wet footclaws, then up at the koopajanitor. But upon further inspection of his familiar face, his glare broke into a grin. "Hey, I know you!"

The koopajanitor raised an eyebrow at Larry. "You do?...Of course you do!" He brandished his mop like a sword, splashing Iggy and Larry up and down. "After all, I _am_ Jan Itor, the finest of His Majesty's koopatrol."

The koopatrol down the hallway narrowed his eyes at the koopajanitor. "Don't lie to these kids…you're just a janitor. _Yan Eetor_ doesn't exist."

"JUST a janitor?" the koopajanitor muttered, marching over to the koopatrol, whom he towered over. "That's what I am? _Just_ a janitor?"

Rattling in his suit of armor, the koopatrol corrected, "no, no, no, no, that's not what I meant…I just meant…I just meant…"

"That you're better than me? That I'm an unimportant part of His Majesty's kingdom because I'm a janitor?"

"No, I think janitors have a very important career, crucial to the well-being of the kingdom," he quickly replied, gulping as he cowered in the koopajanitor's shadow.

The koopajanitor raised an eyebrow and drawled, "I wonder if the Koopa Church is looking for a patron saint of janitorial staff. Obviously, you're up for the job. But Saint JD sounds a little out of place. That has to stand for something…Jealously Delirious? Jabbering Deliquent?"

"I got it!" Larry chirped, thrilled to even be ignored. "_Just_a Dork!"

The janitor smiled down at Larry, bemused. "Yeah, I guess that works, too."

"It's John Micheal," JD the koopatrol spurted. "Though you know that, don't you? I've been getting bills for _Mops Monthly_ and _Espanol para los Goombas_ since last year."

"Naw…I think Justa Dork fits better. After all, you're just guarding the bathroom. I don't see how that's any better than mopping." The koopajanitor turned his attention back to Larry, asking, "And where did you hear of me, princey?"

"You're the janitor! One of the best pranksters actually on staff in the entire palace…renowned for your easy, quick-witted snarks and elaborate, yet simple schemes. Most famous for your focus on the same dummy every time without ever receiving reprimand!"

The koopajanitor beamed down at Larry. "Really?" he asked quietly, clearly touched that anyone recognized him. "You know me for _that_?"

Iggy scrutinized the janitor until recognition finally hit the older koopaling as well. His eyes, already magnified through his thick glasses, were the size of plates. He rushed towards the koopajanitor, eager to shake his hand. Iggy stumbled over his feet and his words in a rush of excitement. Larry, trying to push past him to shake his idol's hand, slipped under his own footclaws on the wet hall floor.

"I'm not a dummy," JD muttered, probably more hurt by his own lack of attention than the situation. Larry, Iggy, and the koopajanitor all looked at JD with dubious expressions. Unable to figure out a reply, he quickly changed the subject. "Anyway, what were you looking for him for anyway? I'm sure it wasn't for his… fame."

"No, that was just an added benefit!" Larry squealed, shaking the janitor's hand and asking him way too many questions at once.

Over his younger brother's stammering, Iggy explained, "there's a chemical spill in Kamek's 23rd quadrant laboratory, room 24B. We were hoping he could clean up the connection to us."

"See, Canoli? I'm needed for a royal initiative…I don't see _you_ being asked to guard any doors for the children of His Majesty."

"…Canoli?" JD asked through his teeth, unsure if asking for the koopajanitor to explain was such a good idea.

"Yeah, Canoli. Canolis are Italian." JD looked just as worried and confused as before. "I hate Italians." The koopajanitor rolled his eyes like it was the most obvious thing ever, JD just exhaling an "oh" and avoiding eye contact.

"So, do you think you could help us? If you're not too busy," Iggy pleaded.

Before the koopajanitor could answer, they heard a piercing scream and all four heads flipped down the hallway, where they saw flashes of magical explosions. "_Kamek!_" Iggy and Larry screeched at each other.

"Iggy, we have to run!" Larry cried, pulling his brother.

"Like we'd be able to outrun Kamek? He probably has his broom…or at least enough magic to stop us in our tracks for the next thirty eternities!"

Larry fell onto the ground before the janitor, gripping his mop like his last limb for survival. "O, wise koopajanitor! What do we do now!"

"What Justa Dork and I get paid to do," he answered gruffly, "absolutely nothing." He shook Larry off the mop and pushed it around, Larry and Iggy standing up and shaking themselves dry, looking confused.

Conveniently for them, as Kamek got close enough to see their faces, he read the confusion as innocence. But the one thing Kamek didn't read was the "wet floor" sign the koopajanitor had set in the hall.

His feet slid underneath him and the magikoopa slipped several feet into the air, landing on his back with a crash. The crowd around him grimaced. JD rushed over to help Kamek up, grabbing his hand and trying not to hurt his back anymore than it was.

Kamek grumbled his appreciation, magically easing out the kinks in his spine before glaring at the koopalings. "Do you two have anything to do with the mess in my laboratory?"

"Wh…what are you talking about, Kamek?" Iggy stammered, trying to keep his head level.

"In my laboratory!" Kamek yelled, "someone has tampered with my experiments! It's _broken_ on the _floor_! Do you have _any idea_ how long that experiment's taken me to get it that far? ANY?"

"That's horrible!" Larry screeched, covering his mouth in unreal shock to mask his lie. "When did it happen?"

"Just now, I reckon," Kamek hissed, not buying Larry's surprise.

"Well then, it wouldn't have been these two," the janitor offered. "They've been here for at least half an hour now."

Kamek's mouth shut as he looked into the koopajanitor's eyes, cold and clear. "Doing what?" he honestly asked.

The koopajanitor shrugged. "Talking. Sliding on the wet floors. Learning how to do the best palace job ever."

Iggy and Larry nodded. Kamek seemed a bit more willing to believe the intimidating, tall and dark koopa, but still seemed suspicious. "You four have all been here all along?"

"Yeah, even Canoli here," the janitor added, gesturing towards JD. "Actually…I don't think he was _supposed_ to be here."

"What?" Kamek asked.

"_What?_" JD asked at the same time…but much louder.

"Wasn't he supposed to be guarding a door?" the koopajanitor asked the koopalings.

"Yes, in fact, I was! THIS door!" JD frantically answered, pointing to the bathroom he was stationed at.

"Please," Larry droned, "who guards a _bathroom_?" He chuckled. "Naw, the janitor's right, Kamek. I think he was supposed to guard a door down the hall or something…"

"A laboratory door, wasn't it?" Iggy added. For good measure, he threw in a faked gasp of realization.

As if on cue, the koopajanitor, Iggy, and Larry all turned to glare at JD.

"You can't possibly believe this, Kamek sir!" JD squealed.

Kamek folded his arms. "In the case that a criminal offense is found within palace limits and without valid witness and in the case of no other suspects, the primary fault is applied to the witness that was supposed to be present, if any are found. I'm afraid you seemingly fit this case, sir."

"You've _got_ to be kidding me!" JD shrieked, looking around for sympathy. "I guess I should have expected this from you, though…" he hissed at the janitor while Kamek magically tugged him along for fine collection.

"Who, me?" the janitor asked, pulling as innocent a face as he could. "I'm _just a janitor_. Why would I lie like that?"

The koopalings couldn't help but snicker; their giggles evolving into full out laughter once Kamek was out of earshot. Thanking the janitor, they ran off to breakfast as fast as they could.

At least _their_ day was starting of well.

* * *

**Author's Note: **Okay, Disclaimer! I own only the spider, Merideth, and Mme Clearmont. The majority of characters are the property of Nintendo, and the koopajanitor and JD are heavily inspired by characters from [Scrubs]. Could you guys tell? :) I honestly don't watch Scrubs, so I had to do lots of reasearch to feel okay writing those two...still not all too thrilled with the result, but I think it made a good scene. I really, really hope you agree, Deanna!

Didn't get through as much as I'd hoped in that chapter, but next chapter should get to the moving faster. And that's when fluff will start again, I do hope.

Hope you all had a lovely Thanksgiving (for those in America) and that you all will have a wonderful Christmas, Hanukkuh, Kwanzaa, New Years, winter solstice, or whatever else you choose to celebrate. Tell your family you love them and play some Nintendo while you've got the time! I'm very, very greatful for you all and the best presents I get from the internet is actually hearing people like this stuff...so thanks for making almost everyday Christmas to me. C:

-Razzi


	31. Completely New

**Foreword:** I'm a little late...but not as late as usual, I think. :) BESIDES I have half of 32 written. That's amazing.

I know Friday _technically _started last chapter, but now we're actually getting INTO it. All the good stuff. (Like fluff! And action! Depending on which storyline you're reading!)

Disclaimer: For the first time in a while, none of this chapter is a gift; it's all my crazy crazy self. Except for the characters...and all the important stuff like that. That belongs to Nintendo.

* * *

"Sire!" Kammy shrieked, hobbling down the hallway after Bowser. "Sire! The meeting was _not_ over!"

"Kamek promised me that the meeting would be _short_. And by short, he had better have meant less than ten minutes. I sat around for FIFTEEN. I am NOT missing my woman any longer," the koopa king shouted in reply, rushing down the hallway. He pushed past a few koopatrols, knocking them into Kammy's path.

"Get out of my way!" Kammy hissed, pushing past them with far more difficulty. Bowser's tail whipped around the corner, and Kammy knew it wouldn't be long before she lost sight of him completely. "Bowser! Bowser! Stop right now!"

"You can't command me around, hagface!" Bowser roared, outraged. "I'm going to breakfast!"

"Your impatientness!" Kammy screeched, trying to get his attention without angering him again, "You don't understand! You shouldn't go to a meeting and then _leave._"

"I got what I went for. I wasn't even going to show up, y'know. Stop wasting your bat-breath and let me go, granny!" Bowser grabbed a railing, looking down into the atrium below. It would save him time…and guarantee that little-miss-tattle-tail wouldn't catch up with him…

However, in that time of questioning his options, she almost _did_ catch up. Noticing Bowser's gaze, Kammy stopped in her tracks. "What are you _doing_, sire? Are you thinking about…about…"

"Jumping?" Bowser finished, looking madly over at his assistant. "Sounds pretty awesome, huh?"

"You can't!" she shrieked, her voice cracking as she leapt for Bowser's leg. He was too fast for her as he swung his heaving mass over the railing and down two stories.

xxxx0o0o0o0o0o0o0xxxx

"Mama Peach?" Bowser junior crooned, batting his eyes at Peach from across the table. "Would you pass me the sugar?"

Roy looked at his youngest brother with raised eyebrows. "F'you put any mo' sugar coatin' in ya, we'll all get diabetes from assoshiashun."

Peach laughed and lifted the sugar, but accidentally dropped it when the table…the walls…and _especially_ the chandelier shook.

The room went silent…except for Ludwig, who was humming notes to himself as he scrawled all over his paper. They stared at each other. "Well," breathed Iggy, "that was weird."

The koopalings murmured in agreement, then returned to their breakfasts. "Wait," Peach paused, still staring up at the jingling chandelier. "Aren't any of you…bothered by that?"

"By what?" Lemmy asked, eggs falling out of his mouth.

"By the freak-of-nature would-be earthquake that just came from the ceiling!" Peach exclaimed, staring in disbelief at the unfazed koopalings.

"Ehh, you totally get used to it after, like, a while," Wendy added.

"Oh, is it the volcano? Erupting or something?" Peach offered, cautiously picking up her fork again.

"THAT would be cool!" Larry shouted. "But naw, it was probably just…I dunno. Doesn't really matter."

Morton grumbled, "_You_ don't matter, you big ninny-face ugly butt!" When Larry just rolled his eyes in reply, he turned to the other younger brother to his left. "And you stink, stinky-face foot-butt!"

Peach looked over towards Morton and Junior, tiredly scolding, "Morton, you don't need to say that to your- Junior! What are you_ doing?_"

Junior had his face covered in grainy white sugar dust, slopping up whatever was left inside the sugar bowl with his tongue. He looked at Peach with wide, innocent eyes. Morton looked at Peach's horrified expression and back at Junior. Maybe he hadn't realized Junior's antics were worth mocking before, but Peach's reaction _sure_ got him rolling.

xxxx0o0o0o0o0o0o0xxxx

Bowser looked over his shoulder again; no one looked at him suspiciously at all. And Kammy was nowhere to be seen. He was just a hallway away from the breakfast room where he would get to see Peach. He had just seen her hours ago…but those intermission hours between the best day of his life and what he hoped to be just as wonderful were torture.

Almost at the black door with his engraved image, Bowser could hear the familiar bickering of his children. From what he could tell, they were _all_ there, which would have been strange, had it not been for that ninth voice. Peach's laugh as she kindly chided one of the koopalings was like the sweetest morning bell in all the kingdom.

And she was there, with his children, on her own accord. To meet him. To spend the day with him. Because she _wanted_ to.

Bowser had all the pride he needed to swing the door wide open.

With the diners in breakfast room so engaged with each other, no one noticed Bowser at first. Then Junior, the only one facing the door, squealed, "Daddy!"

Peach pulled her attention away from wiping Junior's face to Bowser, standing in the doorway. Her eyes lit up as they met Bowser's, her mouth spreading into a wide smile without any effort on her part at all. Her countenance was absolutely glowing…enough to catch Wendy's attention as she began to squeal in approval.

But she seemed to be ignoring everyone in the room but Bowser. In fact, Junior had to struggle to get out of the chair that Peach had accidently pinned him in. "Good morning, Bowser," Peach chirped.

Bowser was grinning, and pulled himself upright, clearing his throat before he replied, "Good morning, Peach." She giggled at his obvious determination to be proper. He continued, "Did you sleep well?"

"Very," she answered with a smile, getting up to approach him. "Very good dreams, too."

"Hey, me too!" Bowser said excitedly. "I dreamt about you!" Peach blushed red in reply.

Lemmy's mouth had formed an 'o' as he stood, listen to the two adults. "Hey Larry, what's _wrong_ with Mama Peach and King Dad?"

"Nothing's wrong with them, Lem!" Larry hissed, smacking his brother lightly on the arm.

"Yeah," cooed Wendy, running over to stick her head between the two mowawked brothers. "They're just in _looove_."

"Wendy," Peach cautioned, now standing next to Bowser. "Just because two people are talking to each other does _not_ mean they're in love."

"A very accurate axiom, your highness," Ludwig duly noted. "However, what I believe Wendy has perceived from your miniscule, yet portent conversation falls far deeper, and rests in veracity as well."

Bowser looked at his eldest blankly, and Peach stuttered for an answer. "Believe what you may, Ludwig," she finally answered, looking away from the koopalings and messing with her glove, "but I still think that two people should be able to have a conversation without subtext being interpreted every which way."

Iggy elbowed Roy, muttering out the corner of his mouth, "It's only subtext if it's subtle." He smirked, waiting for Roy's reply, but he just stared at him blankly through his sunglasses. Surely, his eyes were rolling.

Peach shook her hair out, her face still a slight pink as she ignored the snickering koopalings. "So, Bowser, what are our plans for today?"

xxxx0o0o0o0o0o0o0xxxx

The customers of Madame's Inn sat in the main room, huddled together in the tense quiet. Lights shined overhead as if nothing was wrong, but the tight lines around Mme Clearmont's face seemed to tell otherwise.

She assured the customers that 'everything was fine', and Mario, Luigi and Daisy attempted to return to their breakfast activities unfazed…and were just as successful at hiding their fear as everyone else.

Madame sighed, distressed at her likewise distressed customers. She approached the travelers and leaned in to mutter under her breath, "you'll have to take your business outside, if you wouldn't mind."

They looked up silently, unsure how to answer in the confusion. "For the peace of mind of my customers and the hasty conclusion to this situation, _please_ take yourselves-" she pointed to Daisy's purse, "and your _business_…outside."

Meredith ran over to join them as they stood up to leave, but her mother put out her hand and stopped her. "This isn't your battle, Merbear…" Madame muttered.

Her daughter gripped her mom's arm and looked nervously into her aging eyes. "Mom, is it really that bad? You haven't called me Merbear for _years_."

"I don't know," Madame answered, looking from her daughter to the plumbers and the princess, "but I have faith that it won't be, soon enough."

The trio thanked Madame Clearmont once more before pushing through the door quickly into the dark morning.

The experience was ethereal to say the least; all around them, it was dark as the dead of night, but light was visible on all their horizons and morning birds still sang. The sun, shrouded in the mysterious darkness, shone ineffectively.

Mario gulped, wringing his hands. "Well-a, let's get-a this on." He weakly smiled, awkwardly aware he didn't know where to go next. There was no path of dropped treasure, no power star glittering in the distance. "Maybe the gems know-a the way."

He held out an expectant hand. Daisy looked around, seeing no one but the darkness, and fished in her purse. She pulled out a gem and placed it in Mario's glove. "Well, mystic? What do you see?" she asked dryly.

Mario's mustache twitched as he pondered. "Maybe we should-a look at-a two at-a once."

When Daisy placed the second gem in Mario's hand, the two accidently touched. Slowly, with a twinkling hum, the two began to turn white, a bright light seeping out of the gems. Mario's gloves, though they were already white, began to be as blindingly white as the gloves. "Turn it off! Turn it off!" Daisy shrieked, grabbing one of the gems out of Mario's hand. Quickly, the light seeped away and the gems returned to their normal color. "You know what these do," she hissed. "Even without all four, we can't risk _anything_."

While she was stuffing the gems back in her purse, the darkness seemed to lift. The group watched where it seemed to form the apex of darkness, strangly forming what looked to be a person made completely out of _dark_.

The figure stood with a curving, smoke-like body that reminded them more of an apparition than anything else. Plumes of what seemed to be naught but darkness trailed off what formed its arms, hair, and robes. The figure smirked at its audience.

"A pleasure to meet you all, I'm sure," it said, its voice high and low at the same time, echoing around their heads ever-so faintly. "Though I do wish we needn't meet under such…despicable reasons. Why, I believe you have something…something that belongs to me."

"Who are you?" Daisy sneered, hastily hiding her purse from view.

"That doesn't matter. Names are such trivial things. I'm not sure I even _have_ one, really. A better question would be _what_ am I. And the answer to that is a real tickler, I assure you. Why, unlike you matter-hogs, I am living poetry. I strike fear into the hearts of children I have never even met. I have the power to bring you night under the watch of the sun. I _am_ Darkness. And those gems you're trying to hide, young lady, are _mine_."

"No they're not!" Daisy yelled, praying her shaking legs be still. Luigi, unable to speak next to her, was an absolute wreck already. Mario, flanking the princess on her right, finally seemed interested and not the least bit frightened of their opposition.

"Not yet they're not," it spoke, "but you see….I already have quite the collection." It absorbed its arms into itself, the blacker-than-black center of the creature. When they came back out, he held the two missing gems in each of his solid-darkness hands.

Mario ran up to him, looking to slap his hand and retrieve the gems, but the creature held them high above their heads. "Uh, uh, uh! These are look- don't touch possessions." A gem disappeared into his hand itself and the spectre of darkness brought it down to sweep through Mario's chin lazily, tauntingly. "Much like everything about me, you see-"

Mario interrupted the darkness's speech with a swift fireball through its center. The darkness gasped, cut off from both his monologue and the lower half of his body. He slid away a few yards, filling in his center with darkness again. "So _that's_ how you want to play this game, matter-hog? Alright, but watch out; those who play with fire tend to get BURNED." Suddenly, they were thrown into the sheet of darkness again, the spectre absent from their view.

They looked around, but the darkness was so thick it was hard to see each other, let alone their opposition. With a flash, the light returned as the darkness solidified around Daisy's purse, one greedy little hand of darkness fishing in her purse, the other pressing against her face.

A sudden wave of bravery hit Luigi as he yelped in disapproval. He spun a flashlight out of his belt and yelled a war cry as he shone it at the creature's face.

The darkness immediately dissipated, spreading thin and thinner. Daisy shone in happiness and rushed to Luigi to thank him liberally. "Not-a so fast…" Mario warned, looking around suspiciously. "That was-a too easy."

"Oh Mario, just because _Luigi_ got him and your little fire-trick didn't doesn't mean you need to be all-"

"Where is-a the bag?" Mario interrupted.

With the rate the darkness had dissipated, none of them noticed it had formed the darkness creature again until his eerie voice sounded in their ears and heads. "You idiots," it laughed, floating around them and lingering on Luigi. Like gaseous ice, it ran its dark fingers along Luigi's shoulders. "Though not as pathetic as you look. Admirable job, indeed. Anyway," it continued, sweeping to a rock far away from the three of them. "Are you all looking for this?" It dangled Daisy's yellow bag for them all to see, smirking. "Well, that's too bad. I've got a date with destiny, and I hear she likes pretty gems. Don't worry, though; I'll take good care of- what the-?"

Mario had thrown a fireball just as Luigi shone his flashlight on the creature's arm. The bag fell to the ground and Mario ran towards it, chucking fireballs to keep the spectre from it.

Fighting against the light, the spectre put out the light of each flame with difficulty. It seemed less able to darken an area and remove light as a figure, but it was certainly trying. Luigi shone the light in his face, blinding it from seeing Mario as Luigi could move his light to wherever the creature moved its face.

Soon the bag was back in Mario's grasp, and he ran back to Daisy. With a squeal of frustration, the creature dissipated, instantly putting out Mario's flames and Luigi's flashlight. Cast into the darkness, Daisy could still see her burnt bag in Mario's hands. "You'd _better_ be getting me a new one of those, bucko," she snarled.

He moved to bring it to her when the darkness figure reappeared between the two of them. It was taller this time, its plumes of hair waving down directly above Mario. The plumber skidded to a stop, just barely avoiding the wall of darkness. He whistled and threw the bag to the left, Luigi leaping in the air to nimbly catch it.

Luigi held the bag in the crotch of his arm, running down the way towards the inn, but saw the darkness floating to tackle him. "Go-a long!" He yelled, throwing the bag to Daisy. She caught it and immediately went for the inn again…until she tripped over a solid darkness bar in her way.

The bag tossled high into the air, the spectre stretching out to reach it. Mario's wall-jump off the inn proved more successful, and soon the bag was securely in his arms. But Mario was himself soon in the arms of Darkness.

The creature held Mario, forming a disk around him with just a thin layer of darkness keeping him held, taunting the other two. Darkness smirked, teasing, "if I can't have _just_ my bag, I guess this will do. I think he makes a lovely consolation prize…don't you? Yes, he'll do quite nicely as I rule my new dominion; by my side, at my feet, on his knees…whichever suits us best."

xxxx0o0o0o0o0o0o0xxxx

"So, where are we going now?" Peach asked, following right along with Bowser as he led her down the snaking corridors.

"Town, Peach. The same place we were going two minutes ago," Bowser threw Peach a half-smile as she smacked his bicep.

"Geez, Bowser, you know that's not what I meant! If we're really just going to the down-town right outside the Palace…why aren't we going out the front door?"

"Oh!" Bowser replied, blinking. "I never go out that door."

"Why not?"

Bowser gestured towards the outside of the volcano with his thumb-claw. "Keeps them guessing." He chuckled, continuing on his way. "Not to mention this works exactly with what Kamek set up for us."

"What are you talking about?"

"Well," Bowser began, looking pleased, down at the Princess. "Yesterday was a very special holiday. Probably the most important holiday the entire year."

Raising an eyebrow, Peach said, "your birthday."

"Right!" Bowser cheered, turning Peach into what looked like a subway terminal. The terminal looked about the same as the rest of the dungeon floors of the palace; rustification on the stones and lit by torches in the image of the koopa king. "A time to celebrate me. AND my peons get the day off. _Obviously_ the best day ever."

Bowser and Peach stopped when they reached the crowd of night-shift workers and delegates with suitcases packed and at hand. The king continued, "It also happens to be a very convenient time for a bunch of people to take off work and celebrate me…so Downtown Darklands is going to be _packed_ with people wishing me Happy Birthday for the weekend."

Peach froze, staring up at Bowser. "I thought you said Kamek set it up so we _wouldn't_ be bothered. Bowser…you know if the paparazzi sees me…if word gets to Toadsworth…the mushroom kingdom at _all_, I'll be-"

"Don't worry," Bowser appeased, putting a claw on Peach's shoulder as he ran through her hair with his other. "No one is going to know. No one is going to care. Not even the paparazzi."

"What are you talking about?"

Perhaps Bowser began to answer, but the squealing and screeching of the subway drowned him out. It lurched into the station, designed, of course, to symbolize Bowser. The doors slid open and the commuters piled into the subway. Bowser roared for them to get out of his way, and led Peach onto the subway. She took a seat and Bowser took the two next to her, smiling.

"So I guess I should just trust you, Bowser?"

"_Do_ you trust me?" Bowser honestly inquired.

Peach looked into his eyes and thought long before answering. "You know, with all the kidnappings and destroying my country and ruining afternoons, I probably shouldn't. But I'm learning more about you…and you're learning more about me…and yeah, I think I do." She smiled, grabbing Bowser's hand to look at it instead of his eyes. "Of course, I'm not sure I trust _myself_ right now, but…at least I have a little faith in one of us."

Bowser laughed, pulling Peach's face up back to be level with his. "I love you, Peach."

Peach's eyes were wide and blue, hearing new meaning in those words every time he repeated them. "I know," Peach smiled, holding his claw in place on her cheek, "and I love that."

"Excuse me," an old koopa maid interrupted. Instantly, Peach pulled her hands and eyes away from Bowser, looking away sheepishly from the koopa maid.

"What," Bowser growled.

"Do you know where this train gets off, young man?"

"Lady, can't you _read_? Fourty-second and Spiny, like the freakin' marquees all over the train say."

The lady wobbled on her crutch, unfazed by Bowser's scalding remarks. "Oh, thank you very much, young man. Have a good day with your lady friend."

Bowser grumbled as he watched her wobble away, loudly complaining to Peach, "even if she _can't_ read, she could have asked any of these dunders! Honestly, I don't know how you make it everyday being so dang nice to people like that."

Peach rolled her eyes, saying, "well, you're getting a _little_ bit better. At least you helped her. So…we're going to Fourty-second and Spiny? Where's that?"

"It's in the middle of town. Wideway district. If we get off there, no one will outright assume it's really us."

"Um…Bowser…not sure if you noticed, but we don't exactly blend in. Even here."

"You'd be surprised…" Bowser mysteriously replied, looking down at Peach over the bridge of his nose. His smile cracked and they began to laugh at nothing particularly funny. He grinned. "I'd explain more, but you probably won't believe me until you see it."

"See what?"

"See why, of all the days in the world to go out among my people, today is _the_ best day."

"I guess you're not going to tell me here, then."

"You guessed right, Peachy," Bowser commented, very lightly punching her arm. She giggled, punching him back.

Peach shook out her hair and looked around the full subway car. "So…all these people are going into the city just from your Palace?"

"Yep," Bowser answered, "a few of them work nights and are going home. Some were there for meetings and stayed the night so they can travel home in the day. Every once in a while there's someone who's taking a day off to sight-see or whatever…but really, the Palace is self-sufficient. The ones who _don't_ live there and _do_ have full-time jobs are the minority in the Palace. But there are enough of them all that a station in the Palace's basement is a necessity. Plus, it makes school field trips cheaper to shove all the kids on a subway."

"Field trips?" Peach asked, incredulously.

"Yeah!" Bowser laughed. "Why does that surprise you?"

Peach shrugged. "I've never hosted a field trip at the castle."

"You're not missing much," Bowser snarled. "Hundreds of tiny little trouble-makers, tipping over your statues, sticking their sticky fingers on the walls, getting stuck on the roller-coasters…mooning over your decorations…writing millions of thank-you letters with enough crayon wax to fill a vat…telling you how awesome you are every-time they see you…"

Peach looked over at Bowser, her expression a soft smirk. "You love them, don't you."

Bowser looked over at her. "What? Psh…no…no, of course not! They're so…annoying." He scrunched his face and shook his head as convincingly as possible. "You, though. You'd love it. You should try it some time."

Peach laughed. "I'll make sure to. Unless they're too _annoying_. I don't want to risk getting my walls sticky."

"Well…" Bowser mumbled, avoiding Peach's eyes, "they're not bad _all_ the time…"

Peach snaked her arms around Bowser's, leaning onto him. She smiled, laughing very quietly as she held on to him. Bowser looked over at her, melting. He put his head on her hair and they sat like that, listening to the sounds of the subway and their steady breathing.

But soon enough, they had pulled into the station under Fourty-second and Spiny streets, elevator music in the minor key blaringly reminding Peach what world she was in- Bowser's. They piled off the train with a lot of the other riders, Bowser grabbing Peach's hand to lead her. The double-takes people took towards the royalty were few…and absolutely no one approached them.

It didn't take long for Peach to understand why…like Bowser promised, they _didn't_ really stand out. Within their immediate eyesight alone, there were three girls of varying species dressed exactly like her, down to the blonde wigs, and five other Darklandians that seemed to be imitating Bowser's looks. Three of them looked nothing like him at all, sporting what was clearly just face-makeup or a cheap costume, but the other two could have been his relative.

Bowser beckoned Peach to follow him up the stairs, and when they emerged onto the street-level, there were even more copy-cats among the crowd of Darklandians. The street itself was bizarre to Peach…although it was mid-morning, the smog darkened the sky to the same light that they just had in the subway terminal. Buildings like sky-scrapers climbed into the heavens, piercing clouds of smoke high above their heads. Sounds blared all around them, and lights came from every source imaginable…the building windows, flashing marquees, car headlights, and even not-so-distant rivers of lava, running alongside busier streets.

"Bowser…this place is enormous!" Peach gasped, backing closer to her guide in intimidation.

"Oh, you just wait, Peach."

"And are you going to explain those…people…walking around looking like us?" she asked, glancing a group of seven copy-cats, all walking together.

"_That_ is why I have to remember to give Kamek a raise or something. Obviously, we're amazing. So people want to copy us…literally. Have you heard of look-alike contests?"

Peach nodded. "I've been to a few for Mario, but…are you saying there's a look-alike contest for you and _me_? And don't know about it?"

"Peach," Bowser slowly began, looking at her comfortingly, "we're in the _Darklands_. There's a LOT you don't know about." He laughed and nodded. "They've always had this big contest for people who wish they were me on my birthday here…attracts a lot of weirdos, actually. But hey; they like me, so how weird can they be? A few years ago, they started to add you in for the ones who look more like you, are girls, or are too wise to think they could match up with me. But everyone who dresses up like you sucks."

"Bowser!" Peach scolded, worried for the ears of the koopa Peach-double with a lopsided wig and too-bright lipstick that just walked by.

"Well, they shouldn't be surprised they suck! _Nobody _could _ever_ be as beautiful as you! No matter how similar they looked. Anyway," Bowser continued, not catching Peach's hidden smile, "they have this big thing yesterday. Usually, everyone packs up their bags and goes home today or whatever, but they _never_ stay in costume. It's a one-day thing…and except for the lucky stiffs that actually DO look like us, most people are ready to go back to their little holes they live in. But Kamek…he was actually smart for once in his life.

"He contacted all them big names and put out a _new_ competition for look-alikes with bigger prizes, more rankings, and better motivations. And the ticket price to get in is real cheap…like twenty-five coins or something. The contest yesterday costs one hundred just to get in! Plus, what Kamek isn't having go towards the jackpot prizes, he's advertising to put into one of the charities around here. There's lots of charity things competitors can do that goes towards that same charity…I think he's calling the contest 'Cause-Play'. So basically, everyone that went to that one yesterday and everyone who lives nearby is sticking around an extra day because of something Kamek set up to let us walk around town unnoticed."

Peach rubbed her head, thinking about all Kamek's rigging and hard work just to keep her conceited little desire to not let the news know how she spent her vacation. "Yeesh…you'd _better_ give him a raise."

Peach and Bowser walked down the street a bit, Bowser's eyes glued on Peach's face. She surveyed the buildings, the roads, the sights, smells, and people in this new experience. The town was dingier than any of those in the Mushroom Kingdom _not_ on the "poverty watch" list, but it had a class that wasn't found anywhere outside the "high-salary zones". And the mosaic of citizens itself seemed more vast than that in her entire kingdom. Surely, many of these people from every walk of life and every personality and moral standard wouldn't hesitate to contact the nearest paper to report Peach's tourist state. It would be the biggest story of the year, and the biggest money-maker a tabloid could afford. But Bowser was right…among the hundreds of Peachs walking around that morning, Peach was hardly noticed.

She could enjoy herself completely, as if she was in the safety of VolcanoPalace, but out among the people. It was an experience she longed for even at home, and exactly what she had left her normal plans for. A chance to enjoy herself in the public without being in its eye. And better yet, she got to spend it with a person whom she really…enjoyed being with.

Peach grabbed Bowser's hand and looked up at him. "Thank you."

Bowser smiled back at her, running his free hand through her blonde waves of hair. "You're welcome, Princess."

* * *

**Author's Note:** I actually moved a bit faster at the end than I hoped. I was going to drag Bowser's explanation and Peach's reaction to the city out a bit more, but I kind of like it like this. Fast-paced...like the actual situation. :D

Next chapter resolves the action (but not the explanation) for Mario, so definately look for that. :) The other half, with promised fluff, isn't quite written yet.

I have to mention that sweet Mikari has found lots of y'all being extra cute about this story for me...extra comments, recommendations...all sorts of things. I'm SO FLATTERED. There's something extra crazy amazing about finding people talking GOOD about you behind your back. This is such an awesome fandom we have. C: I hope you guys feel as FAMILIar as I do with y'all.

Speaking of that, mariosonic has an entire oneshot written in CoH's honor, which I plan on canonizing very very soon. Maybe in 32, maybe in 33. :D (I'll remind you when I get there) For other examples of love, I implore you all to check out the fanart (now including fanfic!) section for CoH on the ebtwisty website. Link in profile! Pretty soon, I'm going to have a picture up of MY IDEA of the shadowy spectre, too. If you're curious.

That was longer A/N than I hoped. :[ guess you guys are just too awesome. ;)

-Razzi


	32. Blending In

**Foreword: **GOOD NEWS! and bad news.

Good News First! I'M ON TIME. I haven't been on time for a YEAR and this is AMAZING. Bad News now..._because_ I'm on time, I won't be able to update in 10 days...what's in 10 days, you ask? Change of Heart's _third birthday_! This story's so old, [insert insult here]! But more seriously; I don't know very many stories that last three years without being completed. That's not only very lame of me, but very awesome of you guys. I do feel bad for the story that I'm not going to be updating on it's birthday this year...it feels like after three years, giving it a proper present is the least I could do. But updating on time was just TOO EXCITING. (Plus, Mika asked for it to be updated today. So y'all can yell at her :P)

Disclaimer: I own nothing...not the characters or their environment or anything awesome like that. And the last scene is inspired by something TK sort of asked for...a really long time ago. So if you recognize that, TK, congrats and sorry it's not precisely what you wanted.

* * *

"Dang," Wendy muttered under her breath. Bowser and Peach were walking away still... She twisted the binoculars to their maximum, and again could just barely make out her father's expression. Her absolute balance and focus was necessary to keep on Bowser and Peach. Although they were almost two miles away, the combination of Wendy's surprising patience, the view from the observatory room in VolcanoPalace, and the amazingly high definition on the binoculars kept the situation ideal.

"Wendy!" Bowser junior shrieked, tearing over towards her from the doorway. "What are you doing?" He bellowed.

"Spying on Mama Peach and Dad, duh." She answered coolly. "And you're apparently practicing your Morton impression. Like, I bet _Dad_ could hear you storm in here."

"Woah, those are cool binokalars, Wendy! Can I see them?"

"No, Junior, you can't."

"Aww, come on!" Junior reached over and went to grab the binoculars, tripping over his toeclaw just enough to jostle Wendy.

"JUNIOR!" She roared, raising the binoculars with one hand and smacking her brother on the back of the head with the other. "Like, what the freaking underwhere were you thinking?" She mumbled obscenities as she tried to find Bowser and Peach again in the impossible mass of Darklandians.

Impatient, Junior popped up under the binoculars, staring at Wendy's hardened expression. "Can you see them anymore?"

"No, Junior, I can't! Like, get out of my face!"

"Awww, come _on_ Wendy! We're partners! You gotta tell me when you see them."

"I would, idiot, if I did. But for _some reason_, I lost track of them. I WONDER WHY."

Junior threw a rather obnoxious raspberry at his sister, making her squeal and fall backwards. Pleased with the effect, he plucked the binoculars from her claws and set them against the window. After just a few seconds, he cried, "I found them, Wendy, I found them!"

"What? No you didn't!" Wendy screeched, keeping the binoculars in place as she pushed her brother away to look at his view. "You idiot. That's not them!"

"Of course it is, Wendy! It looks just like them!"

"And so does, like, _everyone_ in the freaking town. Did you, like, even notice that woman you think is Mama Peach is, like, a GOOMBA."

"Nuh-uh!" Junior whined, grabbing the view. "Oh. You're right. Well, why is she dressed like Mama Peach? And why is that guy with her dressed like Papa?"

"It's, like, something Kamek did for Peach and Dad. So, like, nobody notices them. All I know is, like, it sure makes it hard to spy."

Junior loosened the binoculars and moved them around the faraway view. "Naw. It's like Where's Waldoom. Everybody's always wearing the same stripey shirts." Wendy started to retort, but Junior gave her a finger of patience. The tides had turned as the youngest koopaling began one of his favorite games.

Within a minute, he shouted, "There! Got them!"

Wendy did a double-take before snarling, "give me that!" She carefully took Junior's exact view and growled, but didn't say anything. The little brat was _right_. The way they walked through the street with Bowser giving Peach ever adoring gazes and gestures, Peach returning them with mildly flirty, mostly cautious responses was unmistakable. Even the best copycats that day had to offer couldn't duplicate their mannerisms so well.

"So…Wendy…" Junior began, pacing behind his sister. "What're we gonna do with this spying stuff? Is it gonna make us win?"

"Win what?" Wendy mumbled, following her father and Peach.

"Win _what?_" Junior shrieked, ready to attack his sister if she wasn't holding the dangerously fragile view. "The contest! The cupid contest!"

"Oh!" Wendy exclaimed. "I, like, totally forgot about that!...yeah, I guess we could, like, make this work to our advantage. Like, maybe mention things we find out or something…totally good thinking, Junior!"

Junior huffed. "Well, if this wasn't for that, then why did you wanna spy on Mama Peach and Papa?"

"Because, _Junior_," Wendy drawled, "it's cute. You won't understand until you're older. Youngest children are, like, _always_ the slowest to, like, mature."

"Spying from a window a bazillion miles away on people you can't control or nothing is cute? I don't think that's weird cause I'm youngest. I think it's weird because I'm not a stinking alien girl."

Wendy bristled, dropping the binoculars and chasing after Junior. "You little scumbag! What's that supposed to mean!" He roared with laughter and took off down the staircase, his sister hot on his heels.

xxxx0o0o0o0o0o0o0xxxx

"I guess I'd better say farewell to you all," the darkness spectre sighed, holding Mario in its circular form. "Or perhaps you'd like to watch the show? Now I've got all the gems…all I need to do is pull them out and put them together and the worlds will be mine! Mine, to control in perfect _darkness_. Mine, to control in absolute _tyranny_. Mine, to control in-"

A whirr sounded and with a thudding click, light flooded the area. Luigi and Daisy had to shield their eyes, but soon adjusted and found Mario, fallen on the ground in the center of a spotlight, shining from the top of the inn. The spectre that had held him up was gone.

"Mario!" they both shouted in relief. Around the circumference of the spotlight, what remained of the darkness-smoke furled into the air and disappeared. The spectre seemed to be gone. Luigi grabbed Daisy's hand and they rushed to Mario, collecting the gems the spectre left behind.

"We-a now have all-a of the gems-a," Mario announced cheerfully. "Yippee!"

"Thank you, Captain Obvious," Daisy growled, snatching them away from Mario. She smiled, and pulled the brothers into a hug. "I'm so glad that's _over_! ... But where did that spotlight come from?"

The daylight had returned to normal, and the spotlight whirred off. Luigi laughed, pointing up at it. "See for-a yourself, Daisy!"

The three of them looked up and saw Meredith herself, waving cheerily. "How are you guys this fine morning?"

"Relieved!" Daisy answered, showing off the gems to their new friend. "How did you know to do that, Mer?"

"I was watching you guys this whole time," she answered, leaning casually on the spotlight. "My mom won't be too happy I'm not inside, helping all the shell-shocked customers, but this is better in the long-run anyway."

"Oh, my dear!" a voice, that same voice of both high and low tones, laughed. Darkness gathered around Meredith, and it continued, "Better in the long-run for me, perhaps, but your life would have most likely been a lot sweeter, had you stayed out of this."

"Meredith!" Mario yelled, running to try and scale the wall. Too fast for him, the spectre was back from collecting itself in the shadows around them, and had its smokey hands around Meredith's neck.

"That's right, handsome. Climb up here and save your girlfriend…I've got a lovely ransom for her. One a smart boy like you can't _possibly_ refuse. Her life for those eensy-weensy little gems."

Mario continued his climb, impressively leaping onto the spotlight bay and swinging the spotlight around with the same kick that turned it on. The bright light shone at the door leading into the inn, and with a squeal, Meredith fell down. The darkness was gone again.

"Where did he go?" Meredith yelled, getting back up on her feet. The land was covered in another blanket of darkness, and as they spun the spotlight in search of any apex at all, the light began to disappear.

"Not again…" Daisy muttered, rubbing her temple in distress. The land was dark again and there was nothing they could do to quell it. Apparently, they were a lot more stupid than they thought. Their foe seemed both immortal and unstoppable. And they seemed doomed to blindness until he won.

"What is it, princess?" the darkness' familiar voice questioned. "Are you afraid of the dark? Well…that's pretty smart. I'm a pretty scary thing, if I say so myself. But still. You need a bit more perspective."

The area instantly lit up, and Luigi screamed as Daisy's shadow pounced to life, swallowing her whole in another of the shadow's icy grips.

"You have the gems, princess! And I have you! Would you rather have me kill you so I can take them with ease, or just take them out of that lovely purse of yours?"

"Daisy! Don't-a do it!"

"Don't do _what_ Luigi?" Daisy strained, struggling in the spectre's grip. "What am I _not_ supposed to do?"

"Well, maybe my opinion isn't the one you're looking for," the darkness giggled, "but _I_ think you should hand over your gems. Handsome over there probably agrees…I might even let you both live!"

"Daisy!" Luigi began to screech, running underneath where the floated. "I will-a save you!"

"You?" The spectre laughed. "How are you going to defeat me, buddy? Shine a pretty light at me? I'll just turn it off. Throw a fireball at me? That might work…if it wouldn't catch your little princess on fire, too. Oh, no…" It ran a finger of smokey darkness around Daisy's face. "Her only chance at life is if she gives me the gems."

"You can't-a kill her!" Luigi shouted, pleading in absolute fear.

"Aw, listen to that, sweetie. Your man really likes you, doesn't he? Do you think he'll like you as much if you're…pulverized? Smothered? Choked? I guess I could let you pick your style of death…I've got you in my grip now, and unless you're of use to me, I don't intend on letting you go."

"I don't even have them all," Daisy strained again. "You…have…three. In my purse. I…can't reach it. But you…you can."

With the spectre's laugh, shivers ran up and down everyone's spines. "I've got you in my grip so tight you _aren't _of any use. How ironic." The spectre pulled a hand of darkness out of itself and fished in her purse itself. "I guess that was a rather empty threat of mine, wasn't it? Especially since you _do_ only have three. How…unfortunate. You disappoint me, princess. I don't have any further need of you. I guess you _are_ going to die now…and you were so honest!"

"Wait!" Luigi shrieked, sweat pooling around his neck. He grabbed his own hands, looking at the unstained, white gloves. "I have-a the other gem."

xxxx0o0o0o0o0o0o0xxxx

"Bowser, look at that!" Peach grabbed Bowser's arm, swinging him around for a better view of the hotdog stand. "It's run by a _dragon_! And he's the one cooking the hotdogs…is that sanitary? Oh, look over there!" She swung him again, this time towards a T-shirt vendor. "That T-shirt guy's stand is _huge!_ He has more sizes than he has t-shirts…one for every species in every size, I bet! Ohh, Bowser! Look over here!" She swung him again, but this time, Bowser stood still. Not expecting Bowser to _not_ follow her tug, Peach squealed a bit as she lost her own balance.

"Peach, I _have_ seen all this stuff before," Bowser reminded her with a smirk. "Although it is pretty adorable to watch you be so excited about it."

"Well," Peach said, hiding her blush as she fixed her disheveled hair, "it's nothing like back home. I mean…I live in _Toad Town_. There are about four species…I mean _races_…in the entire town. I make up one entire subgroup."

Bowser chuckled, leading Peach down the street. "That's true. And you can be as excited as you want, Peach. Just as long as you stop trying to give me whiplash!"

Peach giggled. "I'm sure I'm not _that_ much of pain."

"No, not really," Bowser agreed, sighing at the understatement. "But, you know…if you want to kiss it better…" He grinned and pointed at his neck.

Peach rolled her eyes, changing the subject, but she was still smiling. "Do you have anything specific planned?"

"Just lunch," Bowser answered. "I'd really like you to see Downtown Darklands from the North Tower. Oh, and we should probably stop by Kamek's contest thing, too."

"Alright…lunch is at 11:30, you said? What time is it now?"

Bowser looked over his shoulder and over the teeming crowd. The huge clocktower loomed in the distance, the third largest structure in the town. Its huge hands read clearly. "Uh…it's quarter to ten. You have an idea of what to do?"

"Hmm…." Peach looked around, glancing from store to store, and she caught sight of one particularly pink storefront just a few doors down. "What about that?" She asked, pointing at the bubble-gum store amidst all the dark, classic koopa hues.

Bowser groaned, "Are you sure you don't want to look at another street?"

"Why not that one?" Peach asked, grinning up at Bowser mischievously.

"It's a beauty salon…do-it-yourself kind of thing. Very popular because it's cheaper than having a stylist do it, and some people just go here instead of doing their hair in their houses. But it's so…pink. And I'm pretty sure they don't like me there."

"Bowser, I thought you said they like you everywhere?"

"They do," he muttered, shifting his weight uneasily from one foot to the next. "But I've been told that the women there like talking…about us."

Peach looked blankly at Bowser. "What about us?"

Bowser tugged at his shell, clearly feeling awkward. "Well…they're a bunch of bored, nothing-better-to-do-but-gossip ladies who sit around and do each other's hair in a store practically dedicated to you. And all they do at home is watch soap operas. What do you think they talk about?"

Peach seemed honestly unaware as she continued, "Why you kidnap me?"

Bowser growled. He didn't like the ladies _or _talking about them to Peach, it seemed. "No…they talk about us…roman-…uh, actually _not _roma-…well, I guess they really just they talk about how I _don't_ deserve you."

"Wait, what?" Peach raised an eyebrow, searching Bowser's face for a bluff. "I thought everyone liked you? And if these gossipy ladies like talking about us as…uh…an 'us', then why wouldn't they think you deserve me? That's so…not normal for your people."

"Tell me about it," Bowser groaned, looking over at the pink store. As they spoke, a Peach look-alike giggled her way through its doors and another out. "But, I can't tear it down because they're not doing anything REALLY illegal. None of the employees are the gossipy ones…just the people who go there and hang out. It's like they choose that place to harbor each other and feed each other's treasonous thoughts or something."

"Well, it is a _salon_…" Peach mentioned, giggling.

"Why is that important?" Bowser asked, his eyes blank.

Peach waved her hand away. "Nothing, nothing…it's a history joke. Anyway, would you tear it down even if it was the employees?"

"Of course," Bowser snarled, "they have no right to talk about their king like some kind of 'over-grown toddler' or 'rag-doll on rampage'. They need civic pride and RESPECT."

"What about freedom of speech?"

"What's that supposed to be any good for?" Bowser asked, giving a hint of a smile. "Sure, it works for you guys. But these people actually do need a leash sometimes, Peach. I'm not sure you realize how much my empire sucked a few generations ago…I'll show you later today."

"After lunch?" Peach asked, innocently.

"Well yeah, sure."

"Good! So, until lunch, we have no plans…right?" Bowser nodded in reply, searching Peach's growingly mischievous expression. "Then we have _plenty_ of time for conquering your fears."

"What's that supposed to mean?" Bowser asked frantically, staring down at Peach's firm grip on his arm.

"Time to get a make-over, I think!"

Peach leading, the two paraded into the beauty salon. The bell tinkled, but no one else seemed to notice their entry.

The salon was quite unlike any building Peach had seen. Just like at home, it was completely done-up in shades of pink and greens and very effeminate. But unlike everything she had at home, Bowser's low relief face seemed to dominate every surface. Strangely, his face was still painted those garish colors.

Bower had his own eyes shut, as if he couldn't stand all the bubble-gum pink. Yet, he understood exactly what Peach was staring at. "I owned the building this used to be. It was a government disguise facility…and it's against the law to destroy any government imagery. Even if the building is repurposed…so they just tried to paint over it."

Peach laughed. "Have you realized how ridiculous some of your laws are yet, Bowser?"

Interrupting them, a worker explained the process of the company to Peach and Bowser. But even with all her pleading, Peach couldn't convince Bowser to put his head in the wash-basin. Instead, he marched over to the waiting room where he promptly shut his eyes again. "Call me over when you're done washing your perfectly clean hair," he grumped. Peach just chuckled, letting the high-pressure water douse her hair through.

From the next chair over, one of the ladies said, "How'd you convince him to come?" She and Peach both had their eyes shut, enjoying the cascade of water. "Your boyfriend doesn't seem like the sit-in-the-waiting-room type."

"He's not my boyfriend," Peach answered immediately. "I'm a…friend. I guess. And I've never seen the town, so he's showing me around."

"Are you here for the look-alike contest?" another lady on Peach's other side asked.

"Um…yeah." Peach lied, opening one eye to see if anyone was suspicious around her. Luckily, the koopa on her left and the mouser on her right both seemed too relaxed to notice Peach's lack of lying skills.

"I don't really understand this contest," the mouser complained. "I mean, why drag Princess Peach into it? I get that the big-headed koopa wanted to see people parade around like him, but it's not like Princess Peach can say she wants the same."

"Are you sure Bowser actually wanted the contests?" Peach asked, pleased she knew something these ladies didn't.

The koopa snorted. "Maybe he didn't _arrange_ them, but I'm sure he _likes_ them." Her water switched to a shampooing downpour. "We've got enough hero-worshippers in our empire that I guess I wouldn't honestly be surprised if he didn't arrange them."

"That's not really the point," The mouser drawled, changing her own water manually. "If Bowser didn't like them, he could snap his fingers and everyone would drop dead for him. But Peach has no choice. Don't you feel a little ashamed, representing her in something she has no opinion in?"

"Um…" Peach began, awkwardly without any idea how to stand up for something she wasn't even doing. "Well, my friend wanted to do it. And everyone says I look like her…so…it seemed…fun?"

"No harm in that," The mouser added, switching Peach's water off _for_ her. Apparently, people in this salon liked moving together. "Except for diminishing Princess Peach's very honor," she said with an added sneer.

"I don't see…how that would diminish Peach's honor. If I looked like her."

"Everything you do," the koopa dramatically exclaimed, waving her hands above her head, "everything you do reflects who you are. And if you look like Peach, then everything you do reflects _her_."

"And _no one_ is good enough to successfully impersonate her," the mouser agreed.

"But wouldn't everyone know it's not _really_ Peach? I mean…there are a lot of people who dressed up like her. It's not like she's…actually…here." Peach stuttered, almost feeling used to this kind of third-person talk.

"Whatever you say," the mouser drawled, the words sucked right out of her as the faucet poured more warm water, giving the final, luxurious rinse. The three all sat in silence, a bit too preoccupied to speak.

Once their waters shut off, this time closer to simultaneously, the two experienced ladies led Peach to the Curling Catalogue, to pick out their automatic curl set up. Peach flipped through the book, bothered. "Um…I usually just do my hair myself…do I have to pick curls?"

The koopa stared at Peach. "No. But I think they have a 'Peach' setting…why don't you just use that?"

"Or do you think doing it yourself is more a nod to her honor? _Princess Peach_ doesn't have a machine for her hair."

"You _really_ don't like this competition…"

Settling on a perm for her fur, the mouser answered, "No, I don't. I guess I'm okay with a Bowser competition…he'd love it anyway. And a Peach one _might_ be fine by itself. But combined…?"

Peach gave an exasperated sigh. "If you think the contests are fine separately, what's the problem with doing them together?"

"Just the assumption that people should have Bowser look-alikes paired with Peach look-alikes. They aren't even together…they won't _ever_ be together…but everyone in this empire plays into Bowser's sick little dreams."

"Amen, sister!" The koopa giggled. She had picked a wavy setting for her own hair. "I'll never understand why Bowser thinks he deserves Peach."

"It's not his fault," Peach said, "I don't think he _wants_ to love Peach. I think it just…happened." She ran a comb through her hair with the hairdryer going, styling it like she did everyday. She looked over at Bowser, growling incoherencies to himself. He couldn't seem to hear anyone and seemed very bored. "I'm pretty sure Princess Peach could be horrible to him and he'd still be in love."

"It's so pathetic," the koopa guffawed. "Everyone thinks our king is oh-so amazing and powerful, but he can't even keep himself from slobbering over Peach. AND he thinks she should love him back? What an idiot."

"Have you ever been in love?" Peach asked, a bit harsher than she meant.

"I've been married for fifteen years, thank you very much!" the koopa retorted.

"Okay, then. Would you be upset if your husband didn't love you, and you were crazy about him? Wouldn't you want him to love you back?"

"If he didn't love her," the mouser replied for her friend, "she might actually be able to move on with her life. Marry that movie star you like, Stacy!"

Stacy, the koopa, laughed. "Well, sure. But then I'd also have to deal with the divorce papers…custody is really messy now a days."

The two of them giggled, oblivious to Peach, pulling out a tangle harder than she meant to. "I certainly hope you're joking…because love is awfully hard to come by lately. When you find someone who actually cares about you the way some people do, you've _got_ to hold on to that. And Bowser is really, truly, in love. He can't help it, he can't fight it. So he's just doing everything he can to make himself happy…sure he's awfully bad at it, and probably has the worst ideas for how to get a girl that exist, but it's because he cares about m-Peach."

The two were silenced for a bit. Clearly, they weren't used to people unfamiliar with their sense of humor or choice of conversation. "So…do _you_ think she should love him?" the mouser quietly asked.

Peach sighed. "I think she….I think…she…I think she needs to understand herself before she dares try to fall in love at all."

The koopa looked over in surprise. "So, you don't think she loves Mario?"

Peach blinked, looking at her feet. Her hair was almost done because; unlike these ladies, she didn't need the assistance of the machines, and the blow-dryer she was using was much better quality than the one at home. "No, I don't think she does. At least, not the way Bowser loves her." She looked at her own reflection, confused and innocent. "Then again, that love is so impossibly rare, maybe she shouldn't compare herself to that. It's unfair to everyone. To Mario, to Bowser, to me…"

Stacy leaned back in her chair around Peach's back. She twirled her finger in a 'coo-coo' motion towards her friend, who sternly nodded. They snapped back up, and the mouser looked at Peach, surprised. "How did you _do_ that?"

"What?" Peach asked, blinking innocently.

"You look _exactly_ like Princess Peach! And that was so _fast_!"

Peach blushed, tossing her hair in the mirror. "Well…I do it like this a lot. Practice."

The mouser let out a low whistle. "You really like this competition, don't you?"

Peach giggled. "No, I just really like this hair-do." She got out of her chair, looking over at Bowser. He was still sitting in his corner, now occupying himself with the manliest magazine there.

She skipped over to him and pulled the magazine there. "Hi, Peach," he grumbled, unable to match her smirk. "You look gorgeous. Exactly the same as you did before we came in, but gorgeous."

She laughed, lifting him up. "Thanks. I've got an idea for your turn, now." Peach began to pull him towards the Curling Catalogue, and his face paled.

"Peach…don't make me go over there! I already think I lost three years worth of professional football watching just sitting over there in the pink. Don't make me any girlier!"

She laughed, setting him down. "No, no. I have just the idea." Upset, he sat down in her old seat- right between the mouser and the koopa. Both looked at the pair with great amusement and confusion. Peach held Bowser's claw (most likely to keep him in place) with one hand, and flipped through the catalogue with the other. "Here!"

The page Peach had landed on didn't look promising. It was at least in the 'Men' section, but with all the curls and bows strewn through the model's long hair, it was hard to tell. "Um…Peach…I love you, but you're _really _pushing it."

Stacy snorted, grumbling something about 'typical Bowser- wannabe' and 'overdoing it as always'. Ignoring her, Peach laughed. "No, not _that_ page. The picture next to it!"

This image was a lot better, Bowser agreed. But the toad with long, flowing hair didn't seem quite manly enough to come up to scruff with the Great Koopa King. "Are you _sure_, Peach? Do I have to?"

"Well, you don't _have_ to," Peach replied, her eyes twinkling, "but I think it would be awesome. It'll take two minutes- I promise."

The mouser peered over, almost falling out of her chair, to see the chosen setting. "Actually," she agreed, "I think your friend is right, buddy. That _might_ look good. Maybe even too handsome for your stupid Bowser contest."

"What?" Bowser roared, struggling not to stand up. "You think that idiot model is more handsome than Bowser? _This_ flippy little Toad?" Sparks were almost at Bowser's tongue tip, and he thrust his claw down on the page. "Give me that hairdo, Peach! I'll show these ladies 'handsome'."

They pressed the button and the overhead curling system settled itself over Bowser's head. He looked pretty cute, like an overgrown toddler trying to prove something with a paradox. Peach giggled, sitting herself down on the hairstylist bench across from the curling stations.

The ladies on Bowser's sides leaned back again, Stacy muttering, "_absolutely_ crazy. Both of them."

The mouser nodded, but glanced at Bowser's determined snarl and Peach's bemused smile. "But they're kinda cute together. I mean, if they weren't pretending to be _Bowser_ and _Peach_…I'd say they'd make a great couple."

"I guess," Stacy agreed, looking over at them both. "They've definitely got _something_ there. At least something a lot more than Bowser and Peach ever will."

* * *

**Author's Note: **Happy Early Birthday, CoH! I'm probably going to force myself to do _something_ in its honor on the tenth...maybe I'll do some "research" and play Nintendo...haven't done that for awhile! ;)

Oh, and by the way- the reason this was on time was because I was able to write next chapter ridiculously fast. Which is a good thing, I promise! I rather like next chapter. :) The segments are bigger, but the pacing and interactions are more along the lines of what I've always wanted, thanks to me doing some planning that I should have done waaaaay back before I ever started writing. Hopefully you guys are as excited for the slight change as I am!

Here's to the next chapters on time! And Here's to CoH's birthday!

-Razzi


	33. About Time

**Foreword: **I really like this whole updating-on-time thing. :) Especially with 34 on track.

I told you I liked this chapter, and I still do. I altered one of the scenes quite a bit, but I think I altered it for the better! So that's exciting.

Disclaimer: Madame, Meredith, and Melanie are the only things I own at all. Nintendo gets all the good stuff.

What a lovely, short foreword. :)

* * *

Peach and Bowser had left the hair salon in just the time they needed to hail a cab for lunch. "You know, I don't usually take taxis," Bowser mentioned, waving to stop the nearest cab. "Actually, I can't remember _ever_ taking a taxi."

"I don't usually, either. It's not proper enough." Peach smirked, imagining the expression Toadsworth would have, seeing her climb into a dirty, old, koopa-driven cab. "But I've seen them on movies enough I should know what to do."

Bowser rolled his eyes, grinning at Peach as he squeezed into the cab. Luckily, the Darklands cabs were bigger than most on the inside…but Bowser was still hunched over and had difficulty getting to a place Peach could join him. After their struggle and a bit of a giggle-fit, Bowser mumbled "North Tower" to the driver. The koopa in the front grunted and drove off.

"Bowser, I really do like your hair like this," Peach told him honestly, reaching up to fix the strands that were stuck against the taxi ceiling.

"Well, it _does_ look pretty good. I mean, it's hard to improve a masterpiece, but I _do_ look pretty hot now, huh?"

Peach giggled, continuing to fix Bowser's mane. All the styling had done was give his hair a bit more sheen and lift, but Peach hadn't really noticed how _fun_ it was to run fingers through.

"Enjoying yourself?" Bowser asked, amused, from under Peach's picking fingers.

She laughed, replying, "Why yes, sir, I am. Freshly-styled hair is always the best to play with…as long as it isn't slathered in hair-spray."

"Good to know!" Bowser announced, chuckling.

The cabbie looked in his rear-view mirror at the two and chuckled. "How long you two been togetha?"

"What?" Bowser and Peach asked at the same time, Peach's fingers still in Bowser's hair as she gaped over at him. Bowser's expression of initial shock melted into a smirk.

"Why would you say we're together?" Peach asked, quickly pulling her hands into her lap.

"What, you ain't? Shoo, tha's weird. Ain't no 'just friends' go to _North Tower_ fo' lunch. And ain't no 'just friends' flirt and giggle and play wif eachutha's hair in the backseat like that, eitha. You just met? Roh-mee-oh and joo-lee-et style at them lookalike contests?"

Bowser choked on his own laughter, determined to see where Peach would take the cabbie. "Uh…no…we're…" however, Peach didn't seem capable of taking him anywhere. She looked over to Bowser with wide eyes, squeaking "help!" between her teeth.

He smirked, as if to say 'you asked for it' and took a deep breath. "We're secret lovers," Bowser explained, putting an arm around Peach. He looked at her, grinning, seeing her eyes go wide as mushroom caps. "We each told our respective spouse we were going to the contest alone, but all along we've been planning to meet each other here and run away together for months now."

"Is that so?" the cabbie asked, glancing at him through his mirror with amused eyes. "Naow, that's somethin' you don' hear ev-er-y-day." He let out a low whistle. "I'm sho glad my wife don't leave to go on these little contests naow!"

"Yeah, well, doesn't the word _secret_ mean you don't _say that kind of thing to complete strangers?_" Peach hissed, directing her question at Bowser.

"Well, _honey_, that's exactly why this is perfectly safe! A complete stranger isn't going to tell anyone about us. Besides, we look just like Bowser and Peach. Who would believe Bowser and Peach are 'secret lovers'? The tabloids are tired of that story anyway."

"I still don't see why you had to make it so awkward and say something _crazy_!"

"Frankly, my dear," Bowser drawled, his eyes twinkling with mischief, "it would have been a lot more awkward in this car if I hadn't. I mean, the tension between us is so strong, it would make either of us snap. We need to give in to our emotions."

Peach's angry face was becoming more and more forced as Bowser spoke more and more ridiculously.

"Tha's prob'ly healthy. Tha's why affairs are so bad fo' yo' health…all them cooped up emotions, then BAM. Somebody snaps."

Bowser put his other hand dramatically on Peach's shoulder, widening his eyes. "It's true, honey-bunch. I'm just looking out for my little snookum's safety."

Finally, just as Bowser and the cabbie predicted, Peach snapped. She burst into fits of laughter, her head falling on Bowser's chest as she laughed so hard, tears threatened at the corners of her eyes.

Both of them were laughing all rest of the way to North Tower until they finally calmed down enough to get out. "That'll be eight Bowsa coins, sir," the cabbie reminded them as they got out.

Too busy laughing to grumble about how he was the king and shouldn't have to pay a lint-ball, Bowser pulled out a handful of gold coins, stuffing it through the cab window. He grabbed Peach's hand and led her, still calming from her laughter, to the door of the North Tower.

"Peach, Peach…calm down so you can see where we are." Bowser pointed directly up, and Peach followed his finger as high as she could see. The clock tower they were directly in front of must have been at least fifteen-hundred feet high, almost exactly at 11:30. "This is where we're having lunch."

"Hey, now," Peach said, forcing her smile down. "You have to explain what the heck just happened in that taxi."

"Well, we got in. The driver pushed on the gas-pedal, which makes it move. And then, after a little bit, we arrived here, and now-"

"Shush!" Peach shouted, unable to stop herself from laughing again. Quickly, she pulled a serious face. "You know what I mean."

Bowser sighed, looking up towards the top of his clock-tower. "Well…just like I said in the car. I figured it'd be awkward, carting you around without being able to explain ourselves. Me, the guy who's crazy about you and wants you in his life every second of it, and you, the girl who…doesn't realize yet how much she absolutely _wants_ me."

Peach rolled her eyes at Bowser's description, but seemed incapable of describing her own feelings at all. "Still," she added instead of correcting him, "I don't think we should just go around saying crazy things like that."

"Again…_no one will recognize us._ I mean, sure they'll recognize us. But they'd never believe it was ACTUALLY us. We could say we were brother and sister and they'd just have to take our word. That's the lovely thing about having no PR." Bowser grinned, his eyes suddenly growing faraway and nostalgic. "Ahh, obscurity. It has its benefits."

Peach nodded, smirking. "So, you think we should just make up stories about our identities? Everyone will just think we're really talented look-alikes with whatever background we choose?"

"Exactly!" Bowser roared with pleasure. "Won't let a soul know we're really us. Pleases your desire to blend into the woodwork, pleases my desire to pretend I'm dating you." He put his arm around Peach. "Now, let's go have some lunch."

They strolled through the huge double-doors at the very base of the clock tower, entering into the strangest building Peach had been in for awhile. As high as she could see in the ceiling-less room, there was naught but clockworks. Tables lined the entire inner perimeter of the clock tower, and balcony-sort of floors about fifteen feet up from each other followed the pattern. In the very center of the tower, a huge glass elevator rose right through the clockwork's midst, pathways leading to each balcony snaking through the least-obstructive path.

It was obvious from the outside that North Tower was, in fact, the biggest clock tower Peach knew to exist. But it didn't really hit her until entering what it would be like. The sounds of the clockworks and conversations of the lunch-rush meshed almost musically, muffled by either magic or clever sound-proofing. Surely, such a huge, almost-hollow clock should be impossibly loud. Peach couldn't even imagine what would happen at the hour.

While she was staring around, Bowser had approached the host. "I'd like to redeem my ever-standing reservation," he grunted, plopping his elbow right on the hostess's table.

A dog-like creature, the hostess glanced up at Bowser briefly before snorting. "Please do excuse me, _sir_, but I'm not so dull to tell you apart from the real Bowser. The Royal Table is, as you apparently know, _reserved_." She looked down, running her paw-finger down the vast list of lunch reservations, muttering, "not that he ever uses it."

"Melanie," Bowser growled, snapping her to attention instantly. "I'm here to use it _now_." Bowser's tone had attracted Peach's attention who wandered to his side. "I want Peach to see the city from the best view and I know _exactly_ where that's going to be in thirty minutes. If you make me miss my chance, expect me to call your mother."

The hostess blinked, wringing her paws. She still spoke stubbornly, but it was clear she was shaken. "I'm…I'm not sure how you got my name, sir, and your Bowser impersonation is excellent. But here at North Tower we have a promise with him and I'm not risking His Excellency's trust on a particularly talented lookalike."

Bowser sighed, drawling on, "Your name is Melanie, and you're the daughter of the owner of the restaurant portion of the North Tower. I was there the day you were born, and you have a birthmark underneath your tail in the shape of a pear. You never passed third grade and you still can't write in cursive. Your dad calls you Melvin, and your mother calls you-"

"Okay! Okay!" Melanie squealed, leaning over her desk in case she had to smother the King's mouth. "Sheesh, you can stop pouring out my life secrets, Bowser!" She fell back into her position and grinned, showing off her canines. "Long-time, no-see."

Peach nudged Bowser, raised an eyebrow and said, "So much for 'not letting a soul know'."

Bowser laughed, nodding to Melanie as she gathered menus to lead Bowser and Peach to the elevator. "You can trust Mel here. Dogs _are_ loyal, after all."

Melanie rolled her eyes at Bowser's uncouth joke, clearly used to them. The three of them entered the elevator. As it climbed up and up, Peach asked, "where _is_ the Royal Table?"

"You'll see," Melanie answered with a smile. "It's very exclusive…we have several high-paying clients who have…_similar_ ever-standing reservations, but they don't usually come for lunch. And they can be bought out for a meal by an exceptionally high-paying diner."

From the glass walls of the elevator, Peach had an amazing view. Although the elevator rose with drastic speed, she still had clear sight of the intricate clockwork and the diners. Every few floors seemed to hold offices instead of dining tables, and Peach even noticed that five or so of the floors seemed to hold very, _very_ shallow stores like a minimall.

Far quicker than a normal elevator would allow, the three climbed all the way to center of the clock's face…which was absolutely huge. Peach couldn't help but gasp.

The elevator dinged and Melanie led them out on the platform, sitting amid the nothingness and clockwork like a rather long dock. Reverting to hostess mode, Melanie explained, "The clock's face is 45 meters across, approximately 170 feet. The original stone front was replaced with the frosted glass you see before you when the restaurant and community center was incorporated into the tower over half a century years ago.

They reached the end of the platform, two thick wire pulleys extending from a thing that resembled a ski-lift. And in fact, when Melanie pressed a button, a ski-lift promptly rose to their position, the wire attached to the gigantic minute hand, set almost directly below them.

Melanie smiled, saying, "I've arranged the lift to take you directly to your table. Your menus are laid there, and your Parawaiter will assist you once you're ready to order. Don't worry about having your food disturbed…the tables are set to remain level through all rotations."

"What to you mean, 'rotations?' Peach asked nervously. She glanced over at the end of the ski-lift, apparently leading to nothing but the minute-hand.

"Well, you _will_ be moving at a continuous speed of five-hundred sixty feet per hour." Catching Peach's completely paled expression, Melanie cordially smiled and clarified, "that's just one-tenth mile per hour…I'd love to explain more, but it seems your seat's ready to get onto lunch if you are."

Bowser grinned at Peach, offering a hand. "Don't worry, Peach. You'll love this." Cautiously, she took his hand and sat on the ski-lift. As it moved them down, the path suddenly shifted as a minute passed. Peach shrieked, gripping Bowser. Looking down below the platform her heels sat on, there wasn't solid ground for over a thousand feet. Just churning clockworks.

They arrived after what seemed like far too long at their table…nothing but two benches and a table cleverly attached to each other and the minute-hand's very tip as to be level with the ground. Bowser took Peach's hand and lifted her from the lift onto the platform. "The first time's the worst. But trust me, the view…and the food, I guess…is definitely worth the nerves."

Peach quickly got comfortable in her seat and looked to the side, just around the minute-hand. Even near the bottom of the clock face, the view was astounding. She could see the breath-taking VolcanoPalace filling most of the view, carved all over to represent thousands of years of history. Radiating from its impressive mass, streets and lava rivers twisted through soaring and squatting buildings. The streets were filled with people, lights, and movement. The ocean was just barely visible through the smog, and the literally invisible boundaries seemed not just beautiful, but symbolic.

"Plus," Bowser added, so used to his domain he didn't seem to catch Peach's mesmerized expression, "the company is unbeatable."

xxxx0o0o0o0o0o0o0xxxx

"What's that music for, Luders?" Iggy asked from the floor. A tray full of fast-food and desserts was in front of him, ready to be devoured, while Ludwig sat in a proper table seat.

"I have a rehearsal with Frederich Longkoopa in just a few short hours. You should be honored I'm allowing time to postpone my studies of the piece for this lunch rendez-vous. This is his original, and he's entrusted it to me for revisions. Quite the liability, but he appreciates my prowess better than most."

"It's not like we wanted you here, blubber-gum. You just came here 'cause you're too stupid to be smart and do anything else, stupid blubber face!" Morton mocked, stuffing fries in his face.

"Didn't _you_ invite him, moron?" Iggy snarled.

Interrupting Morton's comeback, Junior howled, "Save a seat for me!" He walked over to join them, his tray so full of food, he couldn't see a thing in front of him. Including Morton, as he stuck out his leg and tripped him. The youngest koopaling howled in surprise as he fell, his tray of food thrown into the air.

He landed flat on his face, hamburgers and imitation tacos falling like rain around him. "Morrrrrrtonnnnn…" he growled threateningly. But Morton was just laughing and laughing, his voice booming above any other sound in the room. Junior managed to get up and launched himself at his older brother. He was unable to tackle Morton, but that didn't stop Junior. His legs were twisted around Morton's torso as his little fists banged on his brother's head. "You idiot jerk-face monster nugget!"

Morton roared, struggling to get a hold of his youngest brother and throw him off.

"I don't know why I ever agreed to have lunch with you too nimrods," Iggy sighed.

"My sentiments exactly," Ludwig added from his chair a few feet away. He cut his raviolis quietly, watching the two wrestling brothers with slight amusement. "I shouldn't have agreed to this fraternal bonding session before my rehearsal with more _civilized_ company. Especially with food flying around in such a perilous way…I need to keep this original in its pristine condition."

"Then again," Iggy remarked as Morton successfully thrust Junior off his face and threw him into a pile of already destroyed chocolate pies, splattering the chocolate across the food court. "Lunch and a show is pretty good."

Ludwig chewed…for awhile…and then swallowed and replied. "Not to be abstruse, but my idea of a _show_ isn't exactly these kind of lumpen activities. Entertainment should stimulate emotions and a greater respect for yourself and those around you. These puerile food-fights are far from such expectations."

Iggy had stopped listening to Ludwig for awhile now, and was standing on the table, out of Morton's range. Morton marched over towards the fallen Junior, chucking globs of food at him with each step. Once he finally managed to get up out of the chocolate mess, Junior began retaliating, smacking each treat back with a swift kick, punch, or tail-slap. "Iggy! Help me out here!" he screeched, chucking a burrito at Iggy for good measure.

"That's _not_ how you gain allies, Junior!" Iggy roared, wiping the sauce off his face. "If you guys are going to make yourselves look like idiots, at least be smart about it." He dramatically tore off his glasses, tucking them into his shell. Iggy roared as he leapt off the table to tackle Morton. Unfortunately for all of them, he had apparently overestimated his natural vision and only managed on slipping on food, kicking the platters around the room even more.

"Oh, not you too, Iggy," Ludwig sighed to himself. He ducked and avoided the onslaught of flying food, grumbling as he returned to his raviolis.

"Iggy, you mother-mouthed idiot monster! You're as blind as a bat, blindy!" Morton laughed cruelly, grabbing a nearby ketchup and mustard. Channeling the heroes of the old west, he began to squirt them every which way. Patrons and restaurant workers squealed, now avoiding the rain of condiments along with the ricocheting food.

Blindly, Iggy made his way over to the ice-cream topping bar, squinting to make a better view of the scene. He was still determined to teach his brothers how to look like a _smart_ idiot, even if he had to do it blind. Morton was stomping around like the jerk he was while Junior ran around, hopping on all the tables and picking up the messiest foods he could get his hands on to throw. Ludwig remained the only calm koopa in the room, busying himself with his raviolis. If it wasn't for the protective grip he had on his music, it would seem he had no idea of the commotion at all. Even the other customers had retreated to the edge of the room, hiding behind their trays and each other.

Iggy turned back to the ice-cream toppings, just barely making out the five-inch letters to read "Chocolate Sauce". Satisfied, he grabbed the plastic tube and yanked the pump right off the front. He had intended on using the tube to squirt chocolate sauce onto Morton; wipe that grin right off his face. He hadn't realized the force behind the chocolate pump, and it squirted faster and stronger than Iggy could control, overshooting and pummeling right onto Junior…as well as everyone around him.

He dropped the pipe, chocolate gushing onto the ground, and Junior scrambled back onto the table. Literally coated in dripping chocolate, Junior roared his threats at Iggy and prepared to jump.

Ludwig had had enough of this. "You reprobates are going to ruin my music if you persist in these impish dealings. If you'll excuse me, I will take my lunch elsewhe-"

It wasn't like Junior had _planned_ to knock over his older brother. It was just Ludwig's awful timing to stand up while he was jumping. Probably. But whosever fault it was, Junior knew the minute he landed on Ludwig, he was in trouble. He was quick to get off of the eldest koopaling, and run to Morton defensively.

Ludwig stood himself up and inspected himself…now absolutely covered in Junior-shaped chocolate stains. "Why…you…little…_miscreant_! Look at me! I'm covered in your…" he looked at his hand, gripping the Frederich Longkoopa original, absolutely covered in chocolate and completely illegible. Blood was pounding in Ludwig's head. With surprising speed, he launched himself at Junior, pounding on him as he yelled, "Laufen Sie nicht weg von mir! Ich werde Sie töten!"

Morton was thrilled to see his older brother finally engaged in a cause that he approved of, and quickly began flailing on top of Ludwig as well. Anything to keep the fight longer. Ludwig whirled around, socking Morton in the face as he growled, "Gehen Sie von mir, großer Dummkopf weg!"

Iggy excitedly blinked, confused by the blue blur that was now tussling with the brown mass of Junior and multi-colored Roy. He pulled his glasses out of his shell and put them on, shocked to see that it was _Ludwig_. His respectable, honored older brother was wailing on his siblings and yelling in German. He'd completely lost it!

Ludwig had turned his attention back to Junior and was yelling in German again. He'd never looked so angry. Junior was holding his own as he covered his face and scratched at Ludwig. Morton just seemed to be romping on Ludwig for the fun of it.

Just behind Iggy, a poof of purple filled the foodcourt. "WHAT IS GOING ON HERE?" Kammy shrieked, shooting sparks from her wand.

The three brawling brothers stopped instantaneously, gaping up at Kammy with expressions of complete fear. Iggy smirked at them, looking much more innocent than the three soaked in stains in the fight's epicenter.

Immediately, Morton launched into a long-winded explanation. "Idiot-face started it because he's such a butt-lumped grody man with a carrot-brain-"

"THAT'S NOT TRUE, KAMMY!" Junior yelled, stomping his feet. His whining quickly became unintelligible mix with Morton's comments, and it didn't help with Ludwig tried to appease Kammy with apologies.

"All of you!" Kammy shouted, bursting more sparks. "SHUT UP." She shook with anger, answering at the silence that followed. "I don't care who started this. All I care is that every single vendor here sounded the security alarm. This room is a mess. _You're_ all messes. And if you want to continue eating, fighting, or even _living_, take it outside! I don't care if you make a mess _there_. You're going too, Iggy."

"Is that…it?" Iggy asked, his voice dripping with disappointment. "They're not in trouble? But, but, look at the-"

"Oh, they're in trouble," she seethed. "I'm bringing this up with Kamek." Without another word, she pointed to the exit.

Like prison-mates, the four brothers walked out of the foodcourt, heads down. Kammy scurried behind them, pointing them towards the balcony. Once they were out, she snarled before she slammed the door shut.

"Do you realize she didn't even let us take our lunch?" Iggy asked. In truth he didn't mind much. He'd eaten more than any of his brothers, who all had the majority of their lunch splattered across the foodcourt and the rest up and down their bodies.

"Kammy's rather archaic in her punishments. Starving us is probably her idea of being placid," Ludwig commented with a sigh. "When do you think she'll allow for our exoneration and reentry to the Palace? I left Longkoopa's piece in the room, and I need to recuperate it for-"

"THIS IS ALL YOUR FAULT," Morton bellowed out of absolutely nowhere. Completely caught off guard, Junior fell over with a squeak. "Um…yours. And yours. And yours, Iggiot." Morton stopped himself as a grin spread across his face. "That was pretty funny, huh? Iggiot. Iggiot! Ahahahaha!" He climbed up on the balcony balustrade and howled down to the city, "MY BROTHER IS AN IGGIOT."

Just at that moment, the North Tower chimed noon. Even from so far away, it almost shook Morton off his frail standing point. Iggy and Ludwig quickly grabbed his back-legs, securing him in place as he wobbled. "You _idiot_!" Iggy seethed over the minor chimes. "You could have fallen!"

"I think that would have been awfully funny, actually," Junior huffed, crossing his arms.

"Defenestration is in no way _funny_, Junior. Your morbid sense of humor is absolutely indecorous," Ludwig scolded. He and Iggy helped Morton down who seemed to shaken for words.

In response, Junior just stuck out his tongue. He ran to the balcony as the North Tower almost finished its chiming. "Mama Peach and Papa are there right now," he said proudly.

"Where? North Tower?" Iggy asked. "How do _you_ know?"

Smugly, he replied, "I heard Papa talking about it. Plus, Wendy and I saw them today!"

"We _all_ saw them today, captain obvious-pants. They were at breakfast with us," Morton drawled, rubbing the food off of his face.

"Not like Wendy and I saw them. Through binokalars! In _town_." Junior grinned at his brothers, expecting shocked and jealous reactions that never came.

"…so?"

Frustrated, Junior said, "Well…that's better than you losers!"

"You're the loser, mega-loser butt-face whiny idiot!"

"I have to ask, Junior," Ludwig interjected, "what exactly you and our sister expect to gain through watching Father and Princess Peach as they gallivant through the metropolis. You still cannot influence them in any minute way."

Junior sputtered for an answer, but finally just ended up pouting. "You're just jealous."

xxxx0o0o0o0o0o0o0xxxx

In front of Madame Clearmont's inn, the three friends were still in a shate of shock. The spectre of darkness hovered above them all, dangling Daisy dangerously high above the pleading Luigi.

"Handsome, is that an offer of a trade? You're going to give me the gem for the girl?" It giggled in absolute glee. "I think that could be arranged…"

"Luigi, what are you _doing_?" Daisy gasped. "Don't…gah-"

The spectre took more of a coherent shape, holding Daisy around the neck with one hand and the gems with another. "Ahh…I can work with you, big boy! Perhaps you and I will be more suited for the future…you can _have_ your princess, I'll take my gem…we'll both be happy. Enough. For now." It grinned…or what could be understood as a grin. "Alright. Hand me your gem."

Luigi took out the gem, but held it tight. "No! I want-a the princess-a _first_."

"And you expect me to trust you, point-blank?" The darkness giggled again. "How sweet. No, no, good sir. I want that gem _first_."

Luigi looked angry…and not a bit scared. "No. You will-a probably kill us even after you get-a the gem."

"True," the darkness muttered, amused.

Continuing, Luigi snarled, "so I-a want my Daisy back with-a me. As long as I can."

"Aw, a true romantic. I'll miss you, handsome. But you make a good argument…a good enough one for me. Alright, you can have your princess." Daisy fell from the sky, but the darkness was still hovering dangerously above her. "Now…give me my gem."

"Luigi, don't!" Mario screamed from above. Meredith joined him, trying to turn on the flashlight, but the darkness had it under his control.

"Luigi," Daisy muttered, weak from lack of air, "Don't…."

Ignoring his friends, Luigi tightened his grip around the gem. Fiercely, he chucked it up at the dark figure.

It lithely caught it, laughing in pride. "Now, we begin my reign! You should all consider yourselves lucky…few will be able to say they saw the day the Ruler of Darkness began his glory. In fact, few will be able to live to say they ever saw the light of day." It chuckled, rolling the gems separate from each other in its hands. "Isn't that cute. You will never see the light of another day…I've always loved that saying."

Everyone held their breath as the spectre lifted the gems. Giddily, it touched them together. They first emitted a noise…and then the noise became louder, and louder; higher, and higher. The gems melded into each other, lighting up with blinding hues of white. Hues even the pure darkness couldn't suppress.

"It's burning me!" the darkness screeched, looking down at the humans. The void, white spaces where its eyes should go seemed…scared. "I can…feel…it! Darkness can't feel, darkness can't feel _anything!_"

"And light doesn't hurt…" Daisy muttered, understanding the paradoxical truth. "You said it yourself…. Darkness can't coexist with light! You can't exist with those gems touching!" she shouted up at the spectre.

It opened and closed its mouth, letting loose nothing but another scream of pain. "It's killing me!"

"Let it-a go!" Mario shouted, standing up. "If you let it-a go, it will-a stop burning!"

"I can't let go!" The darkness screamed. "If I let go, I lose _everything_!" It seemed doomed to lose everything either way, because soon, the light was expanding. The area around the creature was completely white, with brightness greater than any light they had seen. And from the gems to its hands and up its arms, the lightness was spreading.

The creature began to disappear, literally becoming as light as the area it floated in. The darkness' juxtaposition with the light was ending, and the spectre was dying. Its screams were even more bloodcurdling than the screaming noise from the gems. And though they felt their retinas burning from the intensity, the four couldn't seem to get their eyes off of the event.

Then, with a horrible boom, the darkness disappeared. Completely. The light faded slowly, hanging in the air. The gems had fallen seperate onto the grass…and the sky was as blue as ever.

"What happened?" Meredith asked, blinking furiously.

"Well-a, our universe still appears-a to be in-a tact. I think-a he's-a just…gone." Mario answered, quietly.

"Is he…really gone?" Meredith climbed down the wall with Mario, cautiously walking towards Daisy. Luigi was already at her side, helping her up.

"I'm fine, Luigi," she muttered, gripping her head. "Just have a headache."

"_Is_ he gone-a?" Mario repeated, looking around the calm area.

"Yes, Mario, he is." They looked towards the inn and saw Madame Clearmont in the doorway, smiling. "You guys did it. I didn't think you could, but you did. You just defeated an element of darkness…For good."

* * *

**Author's Note**: I hope I'm not the only one who liked this chapter...because really, I did like it. And I think it hits what you guys like, too!

Next chapter not quite as much...I spend a lot of time focusing on silly history stuff that makes me so thrilled to write/read, but can get a bit dry. BUT I do have a request in there from ShadowKoopa! Usually requests can't get worked into the story as fast as that one was, but good timing was on our time.

Speaking of that, I noticed I promised mariosonic's scene would be canonized by now. Uhh...it's the very first scene of 35, actually. My new method of planning worked it out that way...sorry, dear, but I promise it'll be better than I even expected! Also, I never put up my picture of the Shadow Spectre (who is dead and I don't plan on reviving) on the website, but I think your imaginations should be good enough. :) (aka the picture's really bad).

I really appreciate all the birthday wishes and comments and such from you guys. :) I really, truly think this silly story has some of the best readers on the whole site. The more I find out about you guys, the more I respect you all and am flabbergasted that you still stick around...some for THREE YEARS! sheesh!

Oh! And by the way...all those size details for the North Tower? I didn't just pull those out of a hat. I did some intense research on clock towers, sky scrapers, linear velocity, clockworks, and even begged my friend to help with the math. So it _is_ a plausible building...and it's awfully big. :)

Just like this A/N. uh...at least the Foreword was tiny!

~Razzi


	34. Possibilities

**Foreword:** So, I'm a little later than I've been the last two updates, so I'm sorry. But! Today I wrote a little segment for 34 and realized I not only FINISHED 34...I have three honkin' pages for 35 done, too! Good because UPDATE SOON?, but bad because Friday is going on longer than I expected.

Like I warned you last time, this chapter is probably either going to be awesome or awful. I liked writing it and I like reading it, but I'm a fake-history nerd.

It also has two scenes I want to point out- one, with the random children, I've been planning since before Peach even showed up at the Darklands. Not quite placed where it is, and they weren't quite as into each other (that happened on its own), but basically the same. Also, ShadowKoopa's request is in here, placed lovingly in the middle.

Disclaimer: I own some stuff, but don't like them enough that I feel like claiming. And Nintendo owns the goodies.

* * *

"I had no idea a clock could be so _loud!_"

"You've said that about twenty times by now, Peach. I know the noon bells are loud," Bowser reminded her, laughing. They were already a good five-minute walk away from North Tower after they'd finished lunch, on there way to nowhere exactly, but Peach was still speaking louder than necessary.

"I know…but _wow_! We had those crazy ear-plugs in and everything!"

Bowser laughed, pulling her close to his one side. "It's a good thing, too. If your pretty ears couldn't hear my sexy voice, we'd _both_ be in trouble." They laughed as they continued their way. Bowser pointed up at a cross sign, which read under the street name, 'Growling Garden Three Blocks'. "Remember how I promised to show you some history after lunch? We can go there!"

"A _garden?_" Peach breathed, clearly a bit surprised. "I mean, no offense, but Bowser; how can anything grow in this…environment?"

"Well, it's not exactly a garden of roses, Peach…" Bowser muttered. "I don't want you to be disappointed…"

"I'm sure it'll be _lovely_," Peach assured him. "Let's go!"

They walked the three blocks relatively quickly, joking and laughing about their conversations from lunch, the stores and businesses around them, and anything else that came to mind. When they were just half a block away, the garden was finally visible.

The gate was rod-iron, scraping the dirty sky with its spikes. Thorny vines crawled around the fence and gate, making it look far less welcoming than any public garden Peach had ever seen. If it hadn't been broad daylight in a busy street, the garden would have looked like something out of a horror film. Even with the children visibly laughing and playing inside, Peach wasn't sure she really wanted to go in.

"You sure this is a safe garden, Bowser?"

Bowser laughed in response, gripping Peach tightly from the side. "Besides my palace, it's probably the safest place in the city. Obviously we don't have the same 'standards' for aesthetics here in the Darklands as you're used to. So when the government people were planning the Growling Gardens, they wanted them to focus on being a safe haven for families and citizens. It's really big. Really, _really_ big."

As they entered the garden, it suddenly seemed a lot prettier than it had before. True, the foliage was mostly dark green and putrid shades of normally lovely colors, but it had a unique life to it. Every so often, Peach could see a Piranha Plant with a muzzle, waving its leaves at passerby's. The main path forked into five different directions, each seeming completely unique.

There were trees all around them, and the light seemed to make them almost seem normal. Every so often, peach could see a flashing red-light from the security cameras all around them, but the lights seemed to glitter like fresh berries, not like the peering eyes of the Darklandian government. Peach could actually hear birds _singing_ on the branches. Children were laughing, and there was a faint musical performance off in one direction. "Where are we going first?" She asked, clearly much more at ease.

"To the history ring!" Bowser announced, pointing dramatically down one of the paths. He dropped his claw and grinned at Peach, reminding him of a little kid playing Explorer. "I haven't been here for _years_, but I'd remember it like the back of my claw. There's a zoo at the far end, a performance stage near the Big Lake in the middle, a cemetery over in one of the corners, and a bubbling lava pond just a bit away from the History Ring. Over there, there's a goomba who makes the best gyros I've ever had. He's been doing it for longer than anyone can remember. And there's a cave behind the waterfall system that takes you all the way to the insides of the Museum. Plus, at nighttime, you can see the wild deer run around like lunatics."

Peach beamed. "I didn't realize you liked parks so much! How long are we going to spend here?"

Bowser quickly bit his lip. Then, he overdramatically shrugged. "I don't care. It's just a bunch of flowers…it's not like I actually _like_ the garden. Let's just get that whole History Ring thing over with, and then figure it out."

"Sounds good," Peach said with a smirk, continuing down the path.

"As long as we get some gyros, too."

Walking towards the history ring was oddly peaceful. The garden, in all its eerie qualities, was still rather beautiful. And Bowser seemed so at peace and serene…he seemed to represent all of the Darklands at the moment. Obviously still his intimidating self, like the sounds of the cars and distant screams, but hidden by this mask of familiarity and peace.

And when Peach closed her eyes and held on tight to his hand, it was like all her preconceived notions were gone; nothing existed but what she felt right then.

xxxx0o0o0o0o0o0o0xxxx

Right as his brown-spotted toadcar pulled up at the castle, Toadsworth was met with three frantic toads. "What seems to be wrong, sah?" He pulled the key out of the car, looking from toad to toad.

"That's what we came to ask _you_, Mist Toadsworth, Sir!"

"I don't understand. Why would something be wrong? I didn't call in at all…"

"Well," the second toad answered, sheepishly, "that's why we thought something was wrong. You see, sir, you're five hours later than usual."

"And?" Toadsworth blinked innocently. "Peach isn't here, so my attendance isn't as needed, if I understand protocol correctly."

"You do!" The third toad chirped. She was the shortest of the three, and the newest of all the rookies. "You understand protocol the very best out of everyone ever!"

Toadsworth beamed at the littlest toad, tapping her mushroom cap fondly. "What's your name, poppet?"

"Dane T," she answered giddily.

"And Miss Dane, would you mind fillin' me in on why these gents seem to think something is the matter?"

"Well, you haven't been late for years. And Peach isn't here. And usually you're so scared when Peach isn't here…so they expected you to be very early and freaking out about everything."

"Let me let you three chaps in on a little secret, eh?" He began walking towards the castle, the three toads eagerly trailing. "Sobriety is _wonderful_ for the ole' think-tank. Absolutely spiffing. Also, once you realize there isn't a blooming thing you can do to help or hurt a matter, it all seems to be as minor as the sugar in your tea." He swung his cane from side to side, humming a jolly little tune as the toads tore after him, at a loss of what to ask.

"Toadsworth!" From the castle, the hopping figure of Toadette was just visible.

"Blimey," Toadsworth muttered, squinting to better make the young toad out. "What's she still doing here?"

"You weren't here, sir," the second toad explained. "She was filling your position."

"Of what? Eating cheese and crackers? I don't have a bloomin' job without Peach here, and the meetings 'ave all been postponed until she returns from Grand Canal!"

Toadette tore out to the path, meeting Toadsworth and the three rookies just before the castle bridge. "You're so late, Toadsworth!"

"So I've been told, little lass," he chuckled. "What seems to be the matter, old gel?"

"Remember that meeting you spaced out in? With Shor T. and the Darklands relation team?"

Toadsworth sighed, waving the rookies off and following Toadette into the castle. "Yes, yes. What about it?"

"Well, I was thinking, and what if Peach _does_ like Bowser all of a sudden?"

The old toad swung around to face his friend, eyes bugging. "What could ever give you that idea? Why the bloody underwhere would she _like_ him?"

"Well, I don't know! But it's possible. I mean, he likes her an awful lot-"

"Kidnapping isn't exactly courtship, Toadette!"

"-and he's being a lot nicer to the kingdom in general, too. What if we never set up a system of relations and alliances, and suddenly she's crazy about him!"

"_Crazy_ about him? You're the only crazy thing right now, love! Bless my soul; I've got to sit down. Peach isn't going to ever be _friends_ with the bally monster, and you think she's going to _love_ him?"

"I'm just saying we need to keep our options open. Peach isn't as set in stone as you guys think she is."

"Actually, dearie, yes she is. In case you didn't know, next week she's going to _Grand Canal_. The most romantic city in the world, by crumpets. With Mario. Her boyfriend. And I don't think it's very smart to say she's going to get whisked off her feet by some brute in time to stop the train of emotions that waits for them there."

"Toadsworth," Toadette said sheepishly, "you don't really believe all that, do you? I mean…Peach is a rolling stone. She's not _tied _to Mario, exactly."

"Yes she is! She's head over blooming heels tied to Mario! By golly, you can be so daft sometimes, poppet."

"Well then, Mario isn't tied to her!" She retorted, a little sharper than intended. "They're not guaranteed."

"What do you mean 'Mario isn't tied to her'? He loves her as much as she loves him!"

"No, no, I don't think so." Toadette began fiddling with her pigtails, avoiding eye-contact. "I mean, he doesn't _just_ save Peach. There are other girls. And he's always talking to people…and sometimes not talking to Peach…and…stuff."

Toadsworth blinked. "Other girls? Other girls like who, exactly?"

Toadette began to blush, messing with her hair faster and faster. "Uh…there's that goomba girl. And that one, with the dress and the monkey. And that ghost-lady…and…some other ones. Some nicer ones."

Brushing his hand through the air as if to dismiss all possibilities, Toadsworth explained, "That goomba girl was naught but a fan of his. And Paulina lives in Humanha'en, or whatever it's called. Brookland, I think. And Vivian isn't going to bother him any longer, love. So unless you have other examples, I have places to go."

"I have other examples!" Toadette chirped, "You just have to let Peach move on with her life!"

"Let Peach move on with her life by letting Mario flirt with other women? I don't see your logic, dearie…"

"I just don't think Mario and Peach are meant for each other, that's all! And maybe Peach shouldn't let Mario stand in the way of her relationships. And once Peach has a relationship, Mario can have one! And then everyone can be happy."

"Toadette…_who_ is Mario supposed to have a relationship with?"

"Well…" she mumbled, "Iwathinymaeeme".

"Wot?"

"Iwathinymaeeme…" she repeated, her face flushing red.

"Love, I can't hear a word you're saying."

"Iwathinkinmayeeme!" she slurred a bit louder.

"Toadette, you're going to have to speak up. I'm old, and-"

"ME!" She hollered, her pigtails swinging. Immediately, she squeaked and slapped her hands over her mouth.

All the old toad could do was gape. His eye twitched a bit, and he suddenly broke into laughter. "It's not funny!" Toadette shrieked, looking around nervously to see how much attention they were getting.

"Of course it is!" Toadsworth laughed, "You think you're suitable…suitable for…for Mario!" He doubled over, hooting with laughter.

"Toadsworth, don't! I have just as much a chance as anyone."

Her comment only made his laughter worse, which just made her more frustrated. "I'm sorry, love…but you don't…not really. You don't…under…understand…one bit!"

"I understand that he's wonderful! And that he learns lots of good things from me! And that he trusts me. We could work just fine together!"

"You…and Mario…is this what the…the 'Darklands Relation team' business is all about?" He laughed some more, wiping tears from his eyes. "Getting Peach to love _Bowser_? So that you can have _Mario_?"

"It's a perfectly good idea!" Toadette defended. "We need a relation team anyway…and if she falls in love, Bowser's already crazy about her. So it would save everybody time!"

Toadsworth hooted with laughter all over again, holding onto his cane for dear life. When he finally calmed down a bit, he looked Toadette in the eyes. "Remind me to…to come late…more often."

xxxx0o0o0o0o0o0o0xxxx

Bowser and Peach eventually got to the history ring, though they had been distracted by a man selling singing hats, a rock outcropping that seemed to beg for a quick game of tag, and a knoll of particularly springy grass that was perfect for rolling around in.

The history ring reminded Peach a bit more of her first impression of the garden. It seemed a bit more unkempt, with vines and foliage growing heedlessly around the statue bases.

Ten statues of past and present Koopa Kings formed the history ring, each a bit newer than the one next to it. Bowser pointed to the first one, a koopa that looked like him, but much lankier with a flowing beard and mane.

"This guy was my great-great-great grandfather. He was the king who decided to rebuild and save the garden. It was going to be torn down, but his daughters liked it, so he marked it as a royal property. The statue was put up to commemorate that, and he was _supposed_ to be alone. But his son," Bowser snarled as he adjusted his pointing claw over one statue to the larger and clearly more pompous statue, "his son wanted _his_ statue up, too."

Peach raised an eyebrow, looking from the pompous statue with chinks knocked out from generations of disrespect, to Bowser. "You can't possibly say he's any worse than you are, Bowser. I think the _light posts_ in this city all have your face on them."

"But I'm a good guy!" Bowser explained. He stopped on his words and chuckled. "Well, naw, I'm a horrible, monstrous, villainous jerk. But _my people_ think I'm a good guy. Nobody liked Charleer but himself. They say he started the decline of the kingdom."

If Charleer's statue was vandalized through the years, it was nothing compared to the statue on his side. This koopa, a very short built king with absolutely no hair anywhere but his monstrous eyebrows, was chipped and covered in graffiti in more places than the natural stone shone through. "This punk _really_ ruined it, though. Charleer never found himself a wife, so he just picked the guy closest to a friend he had to reign in his stead. That 'friend' thought he could fix Charleer's mistakes by letting the people govern themselves. But then he decided he really _did_ want power. So basically, the citizens had more taxes than they had money and police enforcing whatever laws they thought up on the spot.

"By the time he was finally assassinated, the Darklands had dissolved intoanywhere from seven to twenty states of power constantly warring with each other. And every other country we ever came into contact with had just as much if not _more_ hate towards the government…but wouldn't bother fighting for or against us. We had enough debt to last until the end of time.

"A few koopas tried to regain control over the Darklands over the next few years, and that's where these losers come in." Bowser waved his hand over towards the four statues forming the next part of the circle's edge. They all seemed overlooked by both the garden caretakers and any vandals…and even the sculptors themselves had seemed to have little respect for their subjects. They were nothing but crude caricatures, and Peach doubted she'd be able to point out any of them in real life.

"Then," Bowser continued with pride resonating in his voice, "came along my grandfather." Bowser grabbed Peach's hand and moved her directly in front of the statue. He was quiet for a moment, moving his free hand to hold the stone hand of his grandfather. Bowser's grandfather looked quite a bit unlike him, much leaner. He seemed just as strong, and his hair seemed like it would have suited a Mohawk very well, had he styled it like Bowser's children.

But what grabbed her attention was the statue's expression more than anything. It was firm and unsmiling, seeming to capture the very essence of great power. And yet, his face and hands were turned outward, looking to help lift up those on ground-level. It reminded Peach very much of a parent, punishing a child for its own good and out of complete love.

"My grandfather Morton was the best king the Darklands ever had. Before me, I mean." He chuckled quietly. "Maybe even a little bit better than me, actually…" He smiled at Peach, sitting her down on the bench in the middle of the circle. "He really pulled us together, cutting the city off from the rest of the world completely until it was rebuilt. People followed him first out of fear, then out of complete respect. He was a very, very harsh ruler and didn't take _any_ crap. Any dissenters in the government were met with immediate action, but their opinions weren't ignored, either.

"Once they had built up power and a sense of national pride, Morton pushed the limits. Literally. He started imperializing, taking land not because it _used_ to be in the old Darklands, but because he wanted it in the _new_ Darklands. And everyone around him was so weak, it was an easy decision to surrender to his armies.

"He decided he didn't want to repeat _any_ of Charleer's mistakes and wanted a clear line of inheritance. So he and my grandmother began the tradition of having large royal families…basically, breeding rulers to pick from at the king's discretion. My father was the third oldest and best cut out to take Morton's place when he died. As much as I think my dad paled compared to Grandpa Morton, my aunts and uncles are all really stupid. So I guess it was a good choice.

"Dad was a pretty good king. He didn't do anything new and exciting…but I guess he just needed to keep Grandfather's work moving. Whatever," He snarled. The statue of Bowser's father was not as well looked-after as Morton's, but it was obviously loved by the public.

"He's probably actually a really good king. But I just know he was a sucky dad. And my entire life all I heard was how he was trying to live up to his father's examples, fill his footsteps. He seemed like he was _scared_ to do anything himself. Did you know he didn't imperialize _anywhere_ but the places Morton had left in transition when he died? And he didn't start any new industries, fix any old ones, or even lead relief efforts. He just sat on his tail and kept the empire from dying again.

"Then we get to me." Bowser grinned and raced over to his stone-self. He stood on the platform, ignoring the automatic electronic warnings to get off the sculpture. "Whaddaya think? Pretty accurate, huh?"

"You'd better get off there, Bowser. Before someone comes and you can't explain who you are!"

Bowser laughed, throwing an arm around his stone portrait's shoulders. "Oh no, the alarm is basically a bluff. It only alerts the security if the sculpture is in any way damaged or it senses paint. And even then…the fine is usually only around fifteen koopa coins….three Bowser coins for serious damage." He hopped down from the platform, joining Peach again on the bench.

"It isn't a _popular_ place, but it is one of the few places that desecrating government property is perfectly fine. As a teenager, I used to come here to spit on my dad. He always played the 'respect royalty' card with me. If _my_ kids wanna spit on me, they can. If they manage to spit some fire, heck, that's even better. I mean, they're gonna get the consequence of their lifetime, but it's their opinion. A little backbone is good for a kid."

Peach muttered, "I don't know if I could even imagine being spit on…I think it happened to me _once_. And the guy was homeless, crazy, and had a salivary gland infection. But my own kid…"

"I imagine you'd be the kind of parent no child would _ever_ want to spit on. Look at my kids! They practically worship you, and most of them just met you this week."

"They worship you, too, Bowser."

"Not the same way," he chuckled. "You could sentence them to a lifetime of broccoli and early bedtimes, and they'd think it was the chocolate and ice-cream hour."

Bowser and Peach continued talking about everything; parenting, parents, history, and even ice-cream, when two koopa children ran into the history ring.

"There, Koopvin! That's the king I told you about. He's the one who tripped over his chomp-chomp and broke three of his fingers!" The older girl ran over to the second of the four caricature kings, gazing at it with amusement across her face. She was dragging a pink doll in one hand, the other hand pointed up at the mostly forgotten king. "Koopvin?" She turned around, her ponytail swinging full around to smack the stone king. "Koopvin! What are you doing?"

The tiny koopa, most likely just out of his toddler years, was gazing up at the stone Bowser with a gaping mouth. "Bowza!" He squeaked, pointing. "Bowza Bowza!"

"Koopvin," the girl sighed, "we have _three_ Bowser statues at home. Not to mention your action figure collection. Look at _this_ guy…he's really rare!"

"But I like Bowza!" The little koopa crawled onto the platform, hugging Bowser tightly around the leg. The alarm went off, but Koopvin didn't seem to mind as he stuck his tongue out at his older sister.

"I _know_ you like Bowser, Koopvin. But he doesn't like you. Hear that alarm? It's telling him someone is being stupid, and he's gonna come over you and give you the biggest spanking you ever had!"

"Nu-uh!" Koopvin squeaked, looking up at Bowser for reassurance. "Bowza not gun come. He too busy."

"Get _down_!" his sister hissed, looking over at Peach and Bowser to see if they were still there. "You're embarrassing me in front of these nice people. They probably think I have an ook-ook for a brother! A Bowser-loving ook-ook!" Koopvin giggled, jumping off the statue for the purpose of imitating ook-ooks further. "Oh, for the love of…"

Koopvin was quickly distracted upon seeing his audience of strangers. His hands fell from his armpits to his sides. "Bowza!" He stood, gaping at Bowser as if he'd seen a ghost.

"That's not the _real_ Bowser, Koopvin," his sister sighed. "He's dressed-up. Just like all the other ones we saw today."

"Nu-uh…" Koopvin moaned, rushing over to Bowser. "You the real Bowza, arenchu, Your mastajay?"

Bowser squirmed in his seat, obviously at a fix. "Uh…Peach…" he mumbled out of the side of his mouth. "You don't think theses kids are paparazzi in disguise, right?"

Peach smiled, leaning over to be almost cheek-to-cheek in answering Bowser. "Even if they are, who in their right mind would tell this kid no?"

Bowser chuckled and bent down to be closer to the little koopa. "I sure am, kid. But your sister's right- you keep hugging my statue like some kind of stuffed animal and I'll bite ya."

Koopvin's grin spread widely across his face. "Really-really?"

"What, you don't think I could be? I'm the genuine article! Tyrannizing, fire-blasting, and awesomeness powers all included."

"Oh, Koopvin, you can't believe this guy. Besides! We shouldn't talk to strangers," his sister whined, grabbing her brother with her free hand. Directing her attention to Bowser, she apologized quickly.

"What are you blabbering on about, girly?" Bowser snarled, raising a bushy eyebrow. "Your brother here is smarter than everyone else in this city and apparently the only one with respect. He's got eyes of the tiger!"

She rolled her eyes, continuing to reason with Bowser while pushing her brother away from the koopa king. "Please, sir. My brother is easily swayed and I can't deal with him and his fantasies. It's not like Bowser would be sitting in a frilly little garden like this, anyway."

Peach spoke up, her tinkling voice turning on the lights in the girl's eyes. "He would if he was trying to impress Princess Peach, don't you think? We don't have anything like this in the Mushroom Kingdom."

A smile flashed across her face, gone as fast as it had come. "I see what you're trying to do, lady. But Peach would know that isn't true- there's a history garden just three miles out of Toad Town that's double the size of the ring."

"There is, you're right. But the garden is in the middle of a burly tree farm, and I'm allergic to burly leaves. And the other museums in the kingdom are all well-respected. It's nice to see public expression, sometimes." She smiled patiently at the girl, dusting off her skirt just a bit.

The girl tilted her head a bit, squinting her eyes. "Are you really…for real…"

"I'm as really Princess Peach as he is really Bowser." Peach looked over at Bowser and smiled, grabbing his hand. "And I'm as surprised I'm here with you two as I'm surprised Bowser's being so patient."

Bowser laughed rolling his eyes. "Me, too."

The girl's eyes went wide and her hand went limp. Immediately, Koopvin ran back to Bowser. "Yo mastejay, can I hug you?"

"Why would you wanna do that?" Bowser snarled curiously. "My kids don't even get to hug me. They spend every hour scrubbing the tile and burning the servant's butts."

Before her brother could reply, the sister finally managed to sputter out, "willyousignmydollforme?" She thrust the doll in front of Peach. It was now obvious what it was…a miniature, stuffed Peach. Her eyes were too big, her mouth too small, and her dress was much poofier than even Peach would dare wear. But the depiction was unmistakable.

Peach smiled. "Of course I can." She took the doll, turning to Bowser while the girl fumbled for a pen. "Bowser, you don't think this is a bad idea, right?"

"Naw. It's harder to find dolls that _aren't_ 'signed by Peach' nowadays. Hers will be one of a kind." He looked at the doll and pulled a face. "A good thing your pretty handwriting is gonna be on it. That's the ugliest Peach I've ever seen."

"People are hard to make into toys, Bowser." She graciously took the girl's pen. "What's your name, sweetheart?"

"Lucy," she mumbled, playing with her ponytail nervously.

"To Lucy," Peach narrated as she signed the skirt's hem. "Keep your spirits and optimism high. And keep loving history! Signed, Princess Peach Toadstool." She handed the doll back, adding, "and I think she's a lovely doll, by the way. Don't listen to Bowser- he's just jealous that boys don't get to play with dolls."

Bowser sophomorically stuck his tongue out at the girls, making them both giggle. Suddenly, Koopvin latched onto Bowser's legs. Bowser lifted his arms up as if too get every bit of him as far from the child as possible, staring down at the koopa in shock. "Where'd you come from?"

"I 'cided I wanted to hug you still!"

"So you just…did?"

Koopvin squeezed Bowser's leg tighter, his chipper voice muffled by the scales. "Uh-huh!"

Bowser bent down and plucked the koopa off his leg, lifting him to sit in his lap. They were now almost eye-to-eye. "So you're telling me that you thought of something you wanted, didn't get the reply you expected soon enough, and just barreled ahead; ignoring all consequences? Just up and did what _you_ wanted with no consideration to anybody else?"

Koopvin looked a little scared, avoiding Bowser's piercing stare. "Uh-huh…"

Bowser grunted. Then he lightly punched the koopa on the arm, sending him to almost fall off his lap. "_That's_ the way to go, kid." He tried to hide a smile as he continued, "Makin' your old kingy proud."

Koopvin's face spread into a wide grin as he reached out and hugged Bowser around the neck. "I wuv you, Bowza!"

"Cool it on the hugs, champ!" Bowser growled playfully, plucking Koopvin off again and planting him on the ground. "Now, you two better get going."

"You wanna be al_ooone_ with Princess Peach, don't you, sire?" Lucy chirped, glancing from Peach to Bowser.

"Yes, I do," he answered, point-blank. "So scram, before I eat you all!"

They grabbed hands and ran off, giggling. Even when they couldn't see the siblings any longer, they could still hear Koopvin bragging about hugging 'Bowza' and Lucy praising her dolly.

Peach looked away from the children's path, glancing at Bowser. He was staring just the same. "You're such a sap, you know that?"

"What?" He gasped. Bowser stammered, looking for a reply, but finally could only settle on a grunted, "No, I'm not."

"Yes, you are!" Peach giggled, standing up and staring down at Bowser. "You make yourself out to be this big, rock-hard monster, but you're nothing but a softy. A sweet, sensitive, softy."

Bowser stood up, standing directly above Peach, with his arms around her figure. "Coming from you, those sound a lot like compliments," he muttered.

"I thought you took them as insults," she retorted softly, fitting into Bowser's embrace as easily as if they were dancing.

"They are. But as long as it's our little secret, I can be your sweet, sensitive, softy all you like."

Peach laughed warmly, bringing her arms up to Bowser's shoulders. "I won't tell anyone- I promise." She laughed again, thinking about Bowser's façade, and how weak it really was. How could she have never noticed the soft underbelly before this week? It wasn't like he was ever a cruel captor; and employing his children as castle guards, even after known failure, didn't seem very malicious. But then she thought about everything _else_ she'd learned about him, including the history of his role as king. That façade was quintessential to his nature, and she wasn't the only one fooled.

"I still want that gyro," Bowser reminded her. "What charade shall we play this time?"

Breaking out of their embrace, Peach put a finger on her lips quizzically. "Let's go as…friends."

Looking almost disappointed, Bowser repeated, "friends? _Just_ friends?"

Peach smiled, gripping Bowser's hand as he led them towards the old goomba's kiosk. "Naw. Brand new _best_ friends."

"With maybe a little more that they just aren't willing to admit?" He pleaded.

Peach laughed, shrugging. "I think 'best friends' are going to be easier to portray. Much more natural."

Bowser snorted in amusement. "You keep telling yourself that."

* * *

**Author's Note:** Hope you all aren't overly dry from this chapter. Having Bowser narrate history makes it lighter, I think. :)

Next chapter is a little exciting. Mostly because we get to see the scene for Mariosonic's oneshot canonization, which I quite love and am awfully excited for you guys to read. Also get some not-quite-fluff that I really like...and a hint at the drudgery of the contest I'm trying my best to make as exciting as possible.

I also have to let you guys know I have some really major tests coming up next week, which means I'm grounding myself from serious writing sessions until next Thursday. Hopefully that won't hinder the schedule too much, but I thought it only fair to let you know in case it does. I have other major tests a few weeks after that, but those I probably won't care about as much once they come around. ;)

Thanks for sticking around and making me the happiest (and often bemused) author I know.

-Razzi


	35. As it Seems

**Foreword: **LOOK GUYS I'm early again. :) And considering I was late last update, this is like...crazy. I mean sure, I had some bits written for the next chapter in advance, but that's still awesome with tests and all.

I really don't love this chapter. However, it has one of my favorite (and riskiest) sections in here...and in order to understand that section completely, you need to read mariosonic's Muted Malicious Mutterings of Malcontent. He had a request long ago for bit in the ball that timing couldn't work out, but we both loved. And being the brilliant author mariosonic is, he wrote it himself and I loved it and promised to canonize it. So here we go! The second bit in this chapter refers to this now-canon but unseen scene.

And now for the Disclaimer: I literally own nothing in this chapter. Not even some of the ideas. ;)

* * *

The koopa king was grossly enjoying himself as he danced on the arcade's dance-mat. Peach wasn't the only one watching him as the crowd gathered around his dance-pad, cheering with every trick. He spun on his shell, bounced from hand to hand, and his feet flew under him faster than the other people at the arcade had ever seen. The arrows on the screen flew by, blurring with each other to the point that it seemed impossible to follow.

Compared to the way he danced at the ball, Peach wasn't surprised, and was almost disappointed. But somehow it still caught her off-guard and she was gasping and screaming just like his new little fan-girls.

Bowser finished his song dramatically, landing on the left-and-right arrows so hard they cracked under his weight. His claws were raised in devil-horns and his still volumized hair made him look even more intense, if it was possible. The crowd broke into roaring applause, in addition to the screaming DJ on the game.

"Alriiiight!" The game cheered, flashing Bowser's ridiculously high score. "Das a new record! Ca-ca-ca-ca_raay_zy!" Bowser grinned, ignoring the crowd for just a second as the game flashed a second phrase on the screen and his tickets began to stream out. Greedily and boastfully, he rolled them as they came and soon had a bundle that was almost hard to carry.

"I know you're all so excited to see someone with so much talent," Bowser roared, "but do you really think I should do another song set?" The audience went bezerk, and many at other game systems around the arcade (including the boyfriends of a lot of the fangirls) groaned. Bowser's eyes looked through all the fans to meet Peach's. She grinned and nodded. At her signal, Bowser swung around and put in two more tokens.

It made Peach much happier than it should have, watching Bowser dance so well and requesting her specific approval. She knew that he just wanted the okay to extend their stay at an arcade instead of going somewhere else for that bit of the day, but frankly, watching him was more fun than a lot of things he'd suggested. Besides, she didn't have to worry about his romantic advances if he was busy dancing…not that that was _completely_ a positive.

The attention was still refreshing as it had always been.

xxxx0o0o0o0o0o0o0xxxx

"…and, as one final note, I would like to commemorate Kamek on his quick-thinking and the fastest organization of a large and legitimate ordeal ever used as a cover-up since Area 15's carnival." The lakitu leading the meeting clapped, nodding in Kamek's direction.

Under the eyes and applause of the conference room full of high-ranking officials, Kamek beamed. "It wasn't much, really. Nice to be back in the ol' saddle."

"'It wasn't much' is right," Kammy sneered, almost unheard under the polite applause.

The lakitu looked at Kammy with interest. "Excuse me, did you have something to add, Miss Kammy?"

"Oh, not much. Just that I'm not sure Kamek deserves the attention he's getting from the board. It's just one event, after all."

The lakitu opened his mouth to politely reply, but Kamek put up his hand. "Jambel, I highly doubt Kammy's comments are a board matter. We can handle the dispute privately once the meeting is adjourned."

Jambel the lakitu nodded respectably, looking down at his notes. "Actually, Kamek, that was our final piece of business. It looks like you and Miss Kammy have the conference room to yourselves. Meeting adjourned."

Jambel buzzed out of the room, followed by the rest of the board members. They left slowly; talking amongst themselves about whatever the elderly officials thought was interesting. Kammy avoided eye contact with Kamek across the room, while her magikoopa 'friend' busied himself with the hem of his robe.

The door shut, leaving them very much alone. The silence prevailed for a few awkward moments until finally, Kamek said, "What's your deal lately, Kammy?"

"What are you talking about?" she mumbled, ignoring Kamek's piercing stare.

"This week you've been particularly horrible, and I've let it slide. It's hard when Peachy comes and steals your shine."

"What are you talking abou-"

"And yesterday, at the dance," Kamek pushed on, "you were more disgruntled than I've seen you in _years_. I _tried_ to help you, but-"

"Help? You did nothing but-"

"And now _today_ you're captain of the witch squad, and that is not a compliment on your sorcery in the least! I'm not the only one who's noticed it, Kammy. If all of this has to do with-"

"Oh, don't you start!" Kammy hissed, her chair jumping back as she stood.

"Don't start?" Kamek replied.

"You don't even know what you're talking about."

"Oh, I don't? So you're _not_ moping about your beloved king and the attention he's getting from the person he actually loves?"

"Now, that's not fai-"

"You get yourself some crazy hope that he'll love you back even though he's obviously in love with someone else, and when that doesn't happen, you get _mad_! And lash out on others!"

"Kamek, how mature do you thi-"

"The koopalings, Kammy! The koopalings are still in pain from whatever anger you released on them. The cleaning crew is mentally scared from just your glares. And you just-"

"Now, you stop, Kamek!" Kammy cried, her wand tip exploding. "You stop this and listen to me! You have _no idea_ what you're talking about."

"Oh, you'd be surprised how close to home this hits, Kam-"

"SHUT UP!" She hollered, blasting wraps from her wand around his mouth. "You're right, okay? I _do_ have unrealistic feelings for Bowser, and my feelings _did _get hurt when he stopped paying attention to me. Is that so unreasonable? Yeah, I got angry. But I should have expected that. I've always known Bowser doesn't really love me; he doesn't even _like_ me half the time. But Kamek, you have NO IDEA how much it hurts to be…to be pushed aside by everyone.

"I'm not just talking about Bowser, Kamek." She walked over to the magikoopa, trembling under her wraps as Kammy's firey eyes scorched his own. "Since that _twit_ waltzed in here, she's been everything anyone cares about. Bowser, the koopalings, the servants… no one has time to even _hate_ me! Bowser's fawning all over her, the koopalings are always adoring her, the servants are always bothering themselves about her…I shouldn't miss it, but I do! I miss being pushed around by Bowser, being teased by the koopalings, being honored and simultaneously hated by the servants. Even you! Even _you,_ for Bowser's sake, are paying more attention to that beautiful, frilly excuse of a woman than you are to me!

"Maybe I'm an ugly hag and a completely witchy woman. Yeah, I know that. I _revel_ in it. But I have emotions! And I freaking _hate_ being ignored. Did you know I spent almost the entire night sitting at a table watching other people dance last night? While _she_ was out dancing and flouncing around like the social butterfly that deserves to be squashed. I've never tried so hard to drown myself in koopale as I did last night, and I still woke up in the morning. I had a splitting head-ache, but nothing much worse than that woman has given me all week.

"And you come in here, accusing me of being obnoxious and witchy. And claiming to have tried to _help!_" Kammy stopped her insane tirade to cackle hysterically. When she turned her glare back to Kamek, her eyes threatened tears. "You _teased_ me with your stupid dances, giving me promises you knew you couldn't keep, and call that _help_? I sat there, watching her dance with her fawning idiots; watching Bowser lose IQ points, ferocity, and self-respect every second her was with her; watching those stupid koopalings run amuck and being blamed for everything they did wrong; watching you _enjoy yourself_ while I was _miserable_.

"Kamek, you did everything _but_ help last night! And then…oooh, and then…" she had been circling him like a shark for awhile now, and situated herself behind his back where he couldn't see the tears make their way down her cheeks. "And then _you_ danced with her. The woman who I hate more than I've hated anyone or anything. The one who thinks she has the right to turn my world upside-down. The woman who stole the only attention I ever wanted from the only people who have ever mattered to me. You did help, Kamek. You helped _her_ break my heart."

Kammy sat down in a nearby chair, wiping her face with wrinkled eyes. She avoided Kamek's eyes, feeling emotionally drained, dry, and bare-naked in front of her closest colleague. That colleague looked on her sympathetically, capable of magically removing the wraps around his mouth, but unsure what he'd say if he did so. The silence that started as awkward soon became more reassuring. Kamek sat himself down next to Kammy, trying to tell her with his eyes what he couldn't figure out words for.

She sat still, looking straight ahead as she tried to ignore the tears that still fell. Kamek put a comforting hand on her back and around her shoulder, letting her head actually fall onto his shoulder. She shook, fighting back more tears. Kamek rubbed her sleeve, wishing she would stop crying, but loving that she seemed to finally release herself to him.

Her head was quite comfortable on the shoulder of his blue robe, her grizzly grey hair draped down over them both. He put his head onto hers, giving her all the attention she'd missed so much. The magic bands had worn off by now, but they remained in silence except for Kammy's occasional sniffle and the scritch of Kammy's fabric against her scales with each of Kamek's comforting rubs.

After a few moments of silence, the old magikoopa opened his mouth. "If it's any consolation," he said, "I think you're much more beautiful than Peach." Kammy looked up at his face, just over hers. He looked dead serious, and she smiled. "And I'm sorry if you ever really thought I was ignoring you," Kamek added. "I'm just afraid if I let too much of myself out in the open, I'll lose everything. It's easier to pay attention to the new and unthreatening than risk your heart with the one who could actually manage to break it."

"Yeah, well," Kammy's croaky voice seemed more strained than usual. Whether it was from crying or from fear of the unknown, it didn't really matter. "That was pretty stupid. But I shouldn't expect anything less from _you_." She snuggled closer into Kamek.

He quickly reciprocated, holding her tighter. "You're pretty dense yourself, hag-woman. We're just a couple of old, haggard dolts with bad timing." With Kammy's head fallen to a place so tenderly on Kamek's chest, he was afraid she could hear his racing heart. She could. She really didn't mind.

xxxx0o0o0o0o0o0o0xxxx

"How do you think I did, Peachy?" Bowser asked with a smirk, leaping off the game platform with a pile full of tickets.

"You know _exactly_ how well you did, Bowser. You're just looking for me to feed your ego!" She helped him pile the tickets in his arms comfortably, picking the loose strands off the floor.

"Maybe I am, maybe I'm not," Bowser answered. "But I still like hearing you tell me I did awesome."

Peach laughed, pulling the tickets apart to see Bowser's face as she added more, answering, "Alright, fine. You did…pretty well."

"Just _pretty well_?" Bowser roared, almost falling over as he moved to see Peach better.

"Yeah," Peach answered innocently. "I hear the _real_ Bowser is amazing at that kind of dancing, and that's probably nothing to him. He wouldn't need to be pandering for compliments."

"Still, what kind of friend are you saying I just did _pretty well_?" They had reached the ticket desk by now, the goomba behind the counter quivering at the sight of Bowser's pile.

Peach opened her mouth to answer, but then shut it as she looked around, considering Bowser's question. "Actually, it's your turn to decide that."

"Decide what?" Bowser asked gruffly, dropping the tickets onto the desk. He watched in silent amusement as they cascaded onto the squeaking goomba.

"What kind of friend I am this time."

"Really?" Bowser chirped, his eyes bright when Peach nodded. "I love it when it's my turn. I think…I think it's always good for it to be _the boyfriend's_ turn…especially when it's their six-week anniversary."

"Six _weeks_?" Peach repeated, laughing. "Aren't _we_ the specific couple!" she laughed, latching onto his arm.

"Exactly how I'd describe us," Bowser cooed, playing with her hair. "You're my poochy-poo who always watches the calendar and celebrates each time we have a milestone of love and tenderness. Aren't you, poochy-poo?"

Peach laughed, always amused by Bowser's variation on a couple. "That's right. And that makes you the sucker…I mean _muffin_… that puts up with me!"

"I'm the muffin that loves you too much for his own good, actually. Plus, you're pretty hot. And wer're only seven wee-"

"six," Peach quickly corrected.

"_six_ weeks in. Still getting the honeymoon heat."

Peach smiled, scanning the prize wall. The goomba had managed to get out from under the tickets and was running them all through a tally machine…the numbers were already high enough Bowser could afford almost anything on the wall.

"So, Muffin Man, do you love your poochy-poo enough to get her that teddy-bear over there?"

"Which one?" Bowser asked, his eyes moving to the giant stuffed bears, threatening to beat Bowser out in size himself.

"That black one," Peach answered. She pointed on the opposite side of the wall to the little black bear nestled between Superkoopa action figures.

"_That_ dinky one? Peach, I could get you anything you want and you want that puny little excuse of a stuffed animal?"

"Oh, woe is me!" Peach dramatically slapped the back of her hand to her forehead, gasping, "I work so hard to keep my muffin frugal and protect his best interests…_our_ best interests as a couple…and he never listens! Men are so impossible!"

"What? That's not what I was trying to do! I just don't think you should bother with such cruddy little prizes when you can have the real deal. I think it's a better idea to pick something _better_ then that."

"That's the problem, Muffin! You always think that what you think is best!"

"Because it is!" Bowser answered honestly, almost breaking out of character. Running with it, he added, "Picking Scrawny the Bear over…say...that remote-control airplane is like picking a fat little plumber man over the coolest, hottest, manliest creature on the planet."

Peach sputtered a laugh, then immediately tried to cough. She ended up looking like she was going to hurl, which just made her laugh harder. Gasping for air, she added, "You sound jealous, muffin."

"Maybe I am," Bowser affirmed, smirking down at Peach. The look between them was warm enough to confuse the goomba even more. They seemed like they really _did_ love each other, as fake as the rest of their display seemed to be. "So, you still want Scrawny the Wannabe-Bear?"

"Yes please!" Peach chirped, making herself look as sincere and innocent as possible with raised shoulders and a popped foot.

Bowser rolled his eyes, but he was still smiling. Just Peach's presence made him smile, poor choices or not. "How many Scrawnies can we get with those tickets?"

The goomba's eyes widened. "Much more than we have in stock," he whimpered.

Bowser sighed, planting an elbow on the desk and examining the prize wall. "How many tickets does the entire stock use up? Can we afford the plane and that wagon to carry them in, too?"

"Bowser!" Peach barked, trying not to laugh. "I don't want _all_ of them!"

"You can hand them out to little children. I know you like little children. Maybe even give a few to the koopalings."

"I didn't think of that," Peach said, leaning against the desk. She looked past Bowser, a small smile appearing at the corner of her mouth as she imagined it. "You know, tough guy, you thought of that before I did."

"One of my hidden talents," he grumbled as he compared prizes the goomba had brought out to choose from.

"Kindness? Or Ingenuity? Or Charity?"

"Ingenuiwhat?" Bowser asked. "Is that awesomer than the other two sissy options?"

"Sissy options? Kindness and Charity are sissy?"

"Yeah, like being 'sweet'. It's not very…awesome."

"In that case, you'd probably say so," she answered honestly. "But I think all three are pretty good to have. And I _do_ think you're sweet, Bowser…in a really good way."

Bowser was glad he was turned away from Peach, because he couldn't help his mouth from smiling like some goofy teenager. It was a compliment Bower really shouldn't have appreciated at all…but he definitely did. As soon as he was certain the blush faded, he spun around to reply. He smiled cheekily and grabbed her cheek. "You're pretty sweet yourself, Poochy-poo."

xxxx0o0o0o0o0o0o0xxxx

Lemmy wandered into a large room, the big-screen television taking up an entire wall, and sighed loudly. He'd been looking for his brothers for what seemed like hours, and hadn't found hide nor hair of Iggy or Larry. And his tail still hurt from when he 'found' Roy.

Wendy seemed occupied in front of the television, her toe-claws propped between little white separators as she painted them a luscious pink. "Lemmy, would you like _not_ moan when you walk in the room? Like, _totally_ ruins the atmosphere."

"Sorry, Wendy," Lemmy grumbled, walking over to sit by her. "I'm just sad."

Wendy rolled her eyes. "I, like, figured that out from the melodrama."

"I can't find Larry," Lemmy complained, staring at Wendy's toe-claws.

"Then go bother Iggy, and like, leave me alone. I'm busy."

"I can't find Iggy neither!"

"Freelz?" Wendy asked, turning to actually look at her brother. Her nail polish brush was held daintily in her claw, threatening to drip. "Are they, like, together or something?"

"I dunno…" Iggy groaned, running his hand through his Mohawk. "I think they're in trouble or something."

"Well, it's not like Iggy and Lemmy would _choose_ to, like, spend their free-period together. Did you check their classes?"

Lemmy seemed almost bored of the conversation, as his good eye wasn't even focusing on Wendy anymore. "Whatcha watchin?"

"Kamek's Cause-Play contest. Duh, Captain Change-the-Subject."

"What's that?"

"What does it look like?" Wendy snarled, pointing a little too fiercely at the television with her nail polish brush. A pink drop flew towards the television and landed squarely on the face of an unsuspecting competitor. "A bunch of freaks and geeks who, like, actually think they're awesome as King Dad and Mama Peach."

"That's stupid!" Lemmy roared, standing up angrily. "Is that why they're dressed up stupid?"

"Well, some of them are, like, actually good. But pretty much, yeah. It's, like, the only thing on right now, and I totally heard that Christian Pale is going to be in it. He's, like, gonna be the best Bowser evaaaah!"

"Isn't King Dad the best Bowser ever?"

Wendy rolled her eyes, returning to her toe-claws. "Well, I _guess_. But Christian Pale is, like, totally hot. And King Dad is like, totally not." She looked up from her nails for a second. "Well, I guess Mama Peach is supposed to think he's hot. Speaking of Mama Peach, have you seen Junior? He's, like, done _nothing_ to help me in the bet today. Total sluff."

"I haven't seen him, either. I think maybe he's with Iggy and Larry."

"Now that's just _weird_," Wendy drawled. "They _must_ be in trouble somewhere…Junior's supposed to be in class all day today."

Lemmy was quiet for a bit, thinking quite hard. "Hey Wendy," he began, narrowing his eyes at his sister. "How come _you're_ not in class?"

"Lemmy, duh! I already said!"

Lemmy's furrowed his brow. "No you didn't."

"Yes, I did. Christian Pale is gonna be on the TV!" She grinned at Lemmy, looking quite love-struck. "That's, like, _totally_ worth missing Old Mr. Fennslee's class. It's not like I actually _need_ algebra in life."

"I thought Mr. Fennslee wasn't here today!" Lemmy shouted, probably a bit too loud as Wendy was right next to him. "He wasn't here for _my_ math class."

Wendy looked up from her nails for a second. "He wasn't? Who…who subbed for him?"

Lemmy shrugged. "Uh, that guy…that koopa with the black shell. Mr Garlic or something?"

"MR. GARCIA?" Wendy shouted, jumping up and knocking over the open bottle of polish.

Lemmy looked up at her from his spot sitting on the floor, and smiled. "Yeah, that's it."

"OkaythanksLemmybyegottago!" Wendy rattled, running around as she picked up her belongings and took off for the door.

"Wendy, wait! Why are you going to math?"

She fumbled with her stuff, attempting to open the handle quickest she could. "Because, Lemmy," she grunted, "Algebra is, like, _totally_ important."

"Oh," Lemmy replied, still staring at her blankly.

"Besides," Wendy added as the door swung open. "Mr. Garcia is, like, _twice_ as hot as Christian Pale. Plus, I can touch him."

"That makes more sense," Lemmy muttered as the door shut, leaving him alone in the giant room. He looked at the TV, staring blankly at the interview with two Peach fans, one with Wendy's nail-polish spot conveniently located on her own claw. They giggled and spun around to show off their dresses, floating up a bit higher to reveal a bit more than Peach would ever want. Lemmy smiled. "Maybe I'll just sit here and _wait_ for Iggy and Larry."

xxxx0o0o0o0o0o0o0xxxx

"Remind me why we're here again," Bowser growled, looking around. The atrium of the Rizz Hotel was full of more Bowser and Peach copycats than he had realized were even in town.

"Oh, shush, Bowser. Kamek did a lot of work to put this thing together; the least we could do is support it."

"It's not like he'd _know_ if we ditched!"

Peach took another step forward in the registration line, her finger pointed emphatically in the air. "Integrity!"

"Meh, I've gone my whole life without integrity. I could stand another hour or two."

"Bowser!" Peach laughed, smacking his stomach. "Besides, it could be fun. I've never done one of these things, and I'd like to see if I win."

"Well, _duh_ you'll win. You're flipping Princess Peach. At a Princess Peach wanna-be contest. You win so hard, you don't even _need_ the 'wanna' part."

"That's not necessarily true," Peach chided. "Did you know Charlie Chaplin Comma T. placed third in his own look-alike contest? And even if you're right, it's something else you can say you won!"

Bowser still had his arms folded, but his bushy eyebrows raised a bit. "Good point, Peach. I do like winning things. I hope the prizes here are better than the crud at the arcade."

"Those bears aren't crud! You saw the look on those kiddies faces just as easily as I did. They thought we were Santa Claus in the middle of summer!"

"I also saw the look on the faces of their _parents_," Bowser chuckled, "which actually made it even more fun. Nothing like creeping out overbearing parents! And that coat-check clerk!" Bowser laughed loud, gaining a few admirable and envious glances from those around them, impressed by his 'Bowser Impression'. "He looked like he thought we were the craziest coots in the world."

Peach giggled modestly. "I guess I'd be pretty surprised to see a giant wagon full of teddy-bears showing up in the coat check."

"Excyuuse me," the high-pitched voice behind the desk interrupted. Bowser and Peach had reached the front of the line and hadn't really noticed. They seemed to be doing that a lot lately. "You'll nyeed to sign heeya, heeya, and heeya. And pay heeya."

The clubba desk woman, awfully matched to her voice, watched them suspiciously through her tiny glasses. They filled out the information, talking and giggling as they answered various questions with answers that, while truthful, were most likely unappreciated. The woman took their sheets back, looking them over. She sighed dramatically, glaring at the two of them. "I'm sure you tyoo think you're soo funny. I've met more so-called 'Bowsahs' and 'Peaches' today than I yever have. But as long as you pay in full and accept your number, I don't cyare if you _are_ the reyal deyal."

"Fair enough," Peach politely chirped as Bowser handed over the koopa coins for the both of them, trying not to grumble.

"Heya are your numbers. Keep them close. You, suh, to the left. You, myiss, to the right."

"Wait, _what_?" Bowser growled. "You mean I have to _leave_ her?"

The clubba peered intensely through her tiny glasses. "Unless you both are entering the 'Peach' competition. Or mayabe the 'Bowsah' competition. But I highly doubt it."

"I don't _want_ to leave her!" Bowser snarled, grabbing Peach's arm.

"Bowser, calm down and just do what she says," Peach chastised. "We obviously can't compete in each _other_'s competition."

"But I don't wanna!" Bowser whined. "It's bad enough that we have to go to Kamek's weirdo convention; I don't wanna go _alone_!"

Peach rolled her eyes, getting an idea as both the desk lady and the line was growing impatient. "I guess you're too much of a _baby_ to go alone. You need me to hold your hand because you're not _manly_ enough. I get it. It's okay, Bowsy-Wowsy. You probably wouldn't do well in the competition with that whiny attitude anyway."

"What?" Bowser roared, looking at Peach in outrage. "That's not true! I just…I just…I was _testing_ you! I'm the most Bowesery Bowser here. I'm so manly, I'll beat this thing in minutes!" And without so much as a beg for a goodbye kiss, Bowser stormed off to the left.

Peach giggled at his shrinking figure before skipping off to her separate line.

Bowser was still grumbling about Peach's taunt, not to mention upset he couldn't be with her, when he got in line. The 'Bowser' in front of him was about two feet too short, but had excellent masking-paint shellacked across his face. The giant spiked shell seemed to be too heavy for him to hold up, and Bowser snorted in laughter.

The 'Bowser' turned around, glaring at the real Koopa King. "I'm gonna win this thing. You see who's laughing _then!_" he taunted, following with his best rendition of an evil laugh. "I bet you won't even pass the preliminary pass-by test."

"The what?" Bowser asked, still visibly amused by the stumbling participant. But his competition chose to keep silent. That is, until a mouser judge walked by.

Catching onto the judging process wasn't hard. Especially since a lot of the competitors decided the best way to impersonate Bowser was to yell at the top of their lungs. The snifit judge would walk by each 'Bowser', make a few marks on his clipboard based on first impressions, and then ask a simple question. Immediately after the 'Bowser's answer, the snifit tallied up the preliminary score and nodded towards the exit or the advancement.

Bowser was in a foul mood that not even dejected expressions on the losers' faces could raise. And when the 'Bowser' in front of him answered "Who do you want to rule by your side" with a smug "Princess Peach, but only if she keeps her mouth shut and her lips puckered", he turned on him with a feeling of hatred he hadn't paralleled all day.

A thousand insults, retorts, and curses were flying through his brain, and Bowser surprised himself when he said nothing, and threw no punches. The snifit tallied the score and nodded towards the advancement.

"What the crap!" Bowser roared, unrestrained. The other 'Bowser' stuck his tongue out smugly, and then attempted to swagger away.

"Please keep quiet until I ask your question," the snifit said, dead-pan. He quickly looked Bowser over, completely indifferent that his subject was quivering in anger and impenitentness. "Thank you," he said, scrawling on the clipboard. "Now. Who would you like to defeat most?"

Bowser did not appreciate the question, especially in his sour mood. "Mario. That's what you want to hear, isn't it, hose-face? But y'know what? Right now, I'd like to defeat you, with your stupid little judgey-hose-face and that _idiot_ you just let go who doesn't even deserve to _think_ about Peach's lips. This contest is frickin' stupid and you're letting stupid idiot faces like _him_ through. OBVIOUSLY only one Bowser can win, and you're wasting your time. So yeah, I wanna defeat Mario. But I'm _going_ to defeat everyone in this stupid contest, especially all those freaks who think they can pull off being _me_."

Bowser was practically roaring in the snifit's face, but the judge didn't care. He just looked down, tallied the score, and nodded towards the door to continue in the contest. His mouth was still open from preparing to roar, and he let it hang for a few stupid-looking seconds. Quickly, he stood straight up and shut it, muttering "well, I guess that's good," before marching into the next room.

This next room was full of activity. Far more than one judge bustled about, four judges to a 'Bowser'. They carried measuring tapes, photo references, and even magnifying glasses. The teams seemed to swallow each 'Bowser' as they moved through the lines, picking at their hair, scales, costumes, make-up, and shells. The judging was much stricter in this room, and the process seemed quite long for most 'Bowser's.

It didn't help the judging process that this room forked in all different directions… "Koopa-Creature: high score", "Non-Koopa: high score", "constructed costume", "make-up work", "Exceptional-Over-All", and, of course, "Exit". Once a team of judges had finished looking over their Bowser, they hit a small bell and a final judge reviewed the clipboard and the subject before directing the 'Bowser' to their appropriate door.

Bowser's eyes were wide as he watched the commotion. At least _these_ judges seemed enthused. But their enthusiasm wasn't appreciated when a team suddenly rushed at him. A parakoopa collided with the side of Bowser's head, a raven ran into his leg, and the other koopa and shy guy were yelling before they even got to Bowser.

"What the crap are you doing to my hair? Hey, get off my foot! Don't touch that! Leave my tail alone! Stop it! Stop it! You freaks!" Bowser stomped around, swatting at the judges as they chattered, trying to measure best they could. "Get away, wouldja? Stop it!"

"Okay!" the parakoopa chirped, fluttering away from Bowser's head. He chimed their little bell, and the team looked at each other with pride.

"Wait…really? You're done already?"

"You pretty much fit all our measurements," the parakoopa explained. "I haven't seen a copy-cat as good as you all day, sir!"

"Um…thanks?" Bowser commented, looking down at the bright-eyed judges. He looked back at his tail, whipping it away from the koopa still stroking it. "I told you to stop it, freak!"

"Sorry, you just have awfully accurate scales, sir! Not many people know King Bowser has triple-ridged scales with a line of double-ridged scales right down the middle of the tail."

"I do?" Bowser asked, not exactly surprised these judges knew more about his physical appearance than he did. Luckily for the confused and a bit creepy judge, the final judge, a dry-bones, walked over just then. He reviewed the clipboard, and suspiciously glanced up at Bowser.

"Impressive," he muttered, circling Bowser. "I'm actually proud of this one, Team 4. Exceptional-Over-All, please."

All the judges, including Team 4, left Bowser to attend their next competitor.

Bowser pushed his way through the bustling room, knocking into a few sad copies of himself and almost tripping over a wiggler. "Freaks," he muttered, just loud enough for a few participants to hear. One 'Bowser', clearly a female even under her mask and costume, burst into tears. This looked like it might be a long day.

* * *

**Author's Note:** I hope you liked this chapter more than I did. :) The contest I mentioned last time isn't going to be this boring for long, I promise. So that's something you can actually look forward to!

Speaking of which, NEXT chapter...that's interesting. Even with a bit of boringish stuff and some backstory for that shadow spectre, it has a longish scene that I can't bear to give away because I love it so much. SO much fun to write. Plus, it's a better balanced chapter than this one. If you felt this one was kind of cut-and-pasted together...hahaha good job you guessed right.

Anyway, here's to another early update, and to the most awesome readers a story could have!

-Razzi


	36. Up to the Challenge

**Foreword:** It's awfully late (timewise, not schedulewise. I'm actually exactly on time for this chapter) so please excuse my weird A/N's today.

I happen to love this chapter. Particularily the end...the first few bits aren't nearly as exciting, and may even seem rushed at places. Sorry about that, but they _are_. I wanted to make certain I got the exciting bit in, which I did, so I really hope it excites you as much as it excites me.

Disclaimer: I do not own any Mario characters or related material. If I did, the world would be a much more Bowser-focused place.

* * *

Bowser would have been pleased to have passed the physical inspection room, but he was still in a sour mood. He was hungry, Peach wasn't nearby, and the room he was in was too dark to even see himself. What a gyp.

Around him, there were occasionally bursts of light and sounds rivaling explosions. A lakitu buzzed over to Bowser, his headlamp almost blinding the koopa king. He seemed to be yelling directions, but Bowser couldn't hear over the roars, combustions, stomps, and other noises. But he _could_ see him frantically directing Bowser to the small room on the right, so Bowser walked in.

This room was tiny and still dark, but much quieter. And he was alone. "This is stupid," Bowser grumbled to himself. "I'm supposed to be spending my last day with Peach, and instead I have to sit in a stupid closet while I wait to pretend to be me."

A door opened, letting in a bit of light and a lot of sound while the judges walked in. The door shut, but with a _click_, an old light bulb went on overhead. They were so covered in fire-proof suits and shock-resistant paddings, Bowser couldn't even tell what species they were.

The central judge said, "Welcome to the Special Effects Portion. We will begin with some of Bowser's most appreciated talents, which may or may not be possible with your costuming choice. If you cannot perform a task, simply say 'skip'. Do not hold back. Do not fear for our safety. Perform each skill with the most accuracy as possible."

Bowser grinned. This was exactly what he loved to do…and this time, nobody could get mad at his lack of propriety. Not even Peach; they were literally asking for it.

The judge continued, "Please hide in your shell."

"Seriously?" Bowser drawled, his face falling. "All the _awesome_ things I can do, and you want me to _hide_?"

The judge merely repeated his request, and Bowser sighed. He jumped just a bit, popping his entire body into his shell with mastered ease. The shell clattered to the floor, pleasing the judges as they scrawled their comments. "Please complete a ground-pound," the judge requested. Almost bored, but determined to show off, Bowser flipped twice before coming down _hard_ on the ground, sending shockwaves through the room.

"Please stomp on the ground as loud as you can." The walls shook. "Please bite this piece of indent gel." He snapped it clean. "Please scratch this metal plating." He sheared it into pieces. "Please return to your shell and spin." With his speed, Bowser lifted himself off the ground. "Please roar as loud as you can." His deafening roar was reverberating too loud for the judges to continue for a few solid minutes.

The judges muttered quietly among themselves, glancing at Bowser every now and then. The central judge spoke up yet again. "We are now going to test your vulnerability. By law, we require you to speak up when you cannot stand the pain any longer. Cause-Play is in no way responsible for any damage you retain and will not accept any law-suits. Retiring to your shell _is_ acceptable, but points will accumulate slower."

Bowser grinned again, stomping his feet into a 'ready' position. "Bring it on," he seethed. The judges pressed switches, triggering sweltering hot conditions, freezing cold conditions, smooth stones lightly tossed at him from the sides, a downpour of harder stones, pointed rocks from all directions, and even small explosions and bursts of flame. Bowser kept his position firm. Finally, they hit their last switch and a chain-chomp, dangling from the ceiling, swung directly at Bowser. He tensed himself but refused to give in to his pride and hide. The chain-chomp hit him squarely in the chest, and except for a flinch, Bowser didn't seem to mind.

The judges hit another switch, muttering to each other again. They were out of ammo. "What," Bowser chuckled, hiding any pain he felt from the onslaught of physical abuse, "no thwomps?"

The judges ignored his joke and turned to Bowser once again. "For the final porition of the Special Effects Portion, we need you to do your best to use fire breath. Please make the largest, hottest, and longest flame you can breathe or artificially create once we turn the lights back off."

"THAT'S what I'm talkin' about!" Bowser roared, rubbing his hands together eagerly. The lights flipped off. "Get ready for some awesome!" He got himself back in the 'ready' position, throwing his hands back as he let out the biggest flame he could muster.

The fire; shades of red, orange, and blue; licked the judges' flame-resistant suits and curled around the walls of the room. He lit the room better than the light bulb ever had, making it hotter than the vulnerability testing had managed. With the reverberating flames, Bowser could feel his own mane singing, but he just kept breathing. After a good while of the onslaught, his flame began to die down. Bowser coughed out one last fireball and held his throat. It hadn't been that dry since he'd last tried to…well…not for awhile.

The room went dark, and began to cool back down to normal. The light flipped on, and the central judge had his hand out to meet Bowser's. "Congratulations," he said, "You've gotten a higher score than anyone we've judged all day. Please head out to Doris at the front desk where you checked in- she will give you the ticket and your new scoring number for the finals and awards ceremony. This is a great honor, and I can't wait to see how you do."

After they shook hands, the judge grabbed Bowser's arm with his free hand. "And, off the record, I _do_ hope you win. Your arsenal of skills is _amazing!_ Doubtlessly the best Bowser impression I've _ever_ seen. You could probably fool Princess Peach herself!"

Bowser took the tickets, inspecting them curiously. "Fool her…marry her…I'll do something." He smirked at the judges and pried the door open. Bowser walked through the large, dark room, noticing the bursts of light as rooms around him glowed red. _I bet my room was reddest_, he thought smugly.

The lakitu began waving and shouting incomprehensible words again, leading Bowser and two other "Bowser"s who had likewise just finished testing. The group headed out the door, one "Bowser" leaving through the front door, another going to talk to his friends who likewise were no longer competing. Bowser trudged on to the Clubba at the desk.

She spied him out of the corner of her eyes, and sighed. Although she was reviewing the papers of the people in line, she spoke clearly to Bowser, "There yis a lyine for a ryeeson. Get to the back of the lyine and wait your tyurn."

Bowser slapped down on the desk, his tickets poking out from under his hand. "I'm an exception," he growled.

Curiously, Doris put down the registration and picked up the tickets. She looked them over and nodded. "Jyust one moment, please." She finished with the copy-cats in front of the line and proceeded to process Bowser's information.

After a few awkward moments of those next in line giving Bowser the stink-eye, Doris finally had all of Bowser's information. She passed him a brochure, a schedule, a new number, and a buzzer. "Please keep all of this with you as it is all nyecessary for the cyompetition later tonight. Congryatulations and I hope you do well."

Bowser snatched his things, grumbled his thanks, and looked around. The line Peach had joined was probably the spookiest thing Bowser had seen for awhile…endless girls with long, blonde hair and flowing pink dresses. Some of them pretty, most of them disappointing, and only one truly beautiful.

She looked just like everyone around her, but when _that _Peach turned around, her golden hair spun behind her like a halo. Her eyes shone with patience and her face lit up as she laughed. Bowser could tell that the wannabe behind her had just said some joke. Peach's bright blue eyes twinkled, and her dainty, perfect movements seemed just as beautiful. Even if the women around her weren't so bad at trying to look beautiful, Bowser supposed he could tell her apart just from that twinkle in her eyes. And the lump in his throat was a pretty big hint, too.

The koopa king lumbered over to her as quickly as his hulking size could allow. Peach was so engulfed in her new koopa friend's conversation that she almost didn't notice Bowser approaching. When _she_ caught sight of Bowser, her eyes lit up in a way that the jokes had never managed. "Bowser, what are you doing over here?" she chirped, visibly restraining herself from leaving the line and running over to him.

"I finished and I wanted to see you!" He answered proudly.

"You _finished?_" Peach and her new friend answered in tandem. "But there are so many Bowsers!"

Bowser looked casually over to the squirrely lakitu judging the Peaches. These ladies seemed to interpret a quick answer to a quick question as an opportunity to gush on for as long as they could about whatever popped into their heads. "Yeah, but Bowser impersonators apparently think I'm incapable of saying more than a sentence. And your wannabes…"

Peach peered over at the current Peach being judged and laughed. "Okay. Good point. So what are you going to do until I'm done?"

"I was gonna stay here, with you," Bowser answered, as if it was the most obvious thing he could say.

"You can't stay here," Peach's friend behind her said. "Unless you're in line to be in the contest, they'll kick you out. And you're _obviously _not in line to be Peach."

"But they'd let me stay if I _was_, right?" Bowser growled. With a quizzical look, the friend nodded.

Bowser pouted, and then looked around. Spotting a young goomba not to far, he hollered, "Hey, you! Munchkin!"

The goomba looked around, apparently used to the nick-name, and caught Bowser's eye. He responded to the koopa king's beckoning finger with eyes like silver dollars. He almost took off in the opposite direction, but Bowser quickly flashed a handful of koopa coins he'd taken from his shell. Greedily, the goomba ran towards him.

"I need you to go to the gift store and buy me a blonde Peach wig and the biggest pink dress they sell. I'll give you a hundred koopa coins…you can keep the change. But if you don't come back, I'll find you and I'll beat you into a pancake."

"Yessir!" the goomba squeaked, taking the money and running. Pleased, Bowser budged himself into line between Peach and her acquaintance-friend.

From three people behind, a rather tall look-alike started complaining, "Hey, fatso! You can't do that! We've been waiting in line for _hours_!"

Bowser spun around and glared at her. "What's your point? I wanna stand _here_. By _her_. You got a problem with that?"

"Bowser, don't," Peach muttered, grabbing his bicep. "You shouldn't call attention to yourself."

"I wanna stand by you, Peach! And that lady thinks that I shouldn't."

"Well, they _have_ been waiting in line. It's not fair for you to cut like that."

"Listen to your girlfriend, doofus!" the woman screeched, stomping her imitation Peach-pump. "Get to the back of the line!"

Bowser snarled as he turned to face her. Feeling Peach's hand on his arm, he tried to keep down his temper. "I _don't want to_. It would make me _very mad_ to move to the back of the line. But _you_ want me to. All of you who want me to move to the back of the line- congratulations. I guess I will. But know what? When I do, I'll be _very mad_. And I tend to take my anger out on whoever made me mad. So, even though me standing by this beautiful woman makes me happy, calm, and safe and only makes you wait about thirty-seconds longer than usual, I guess I'll move back because _you idiots_ want me to. Even though _that_ will make me angry, violent, and impatient. You guys might not come home with all your limbs, maybe a bit of mental scarring, and most likely lose this stupid contest anyway, but hey. You got your place in line!" To seal the deal, Bowser flashed a grin, letting his fangs fill in all the threats he forgot.

"Bowser, you're being ridiculous…" Peach muttered. "You really don't need to-"

"I wanna stand by you," he answered honestly. "I would hope you want me to, too. And it'll just make them wait thirty seconds more. Besides…it's not like anyone thinks I'm going to _win._" Bowser smiled, trying to get a smile out of Peach. Somehow, he managed. He was right- waiting around _was _getting a little goring.

While the women behind them shuffled from side to side, awkwardly mumbling to themselves and each other, the young goomba came back, huffing and puffing under the weight of the huge pink dress.

"There you are!" Bowser roared. He picked up the dress and looked at it. "You think I can tear this enough to fit? Or," he turned from the goomba to the back of the line. "Should I just not put it on, since I'm not going to be standing this far ahead in line anyway?"

"No, no!" one of the women shrieked, chorused by a few other scared-looking Peaches. "You can stay there. That's okay. We overreacted!"

Pleased with himself, Bowser proceeded to tear the dress enough to appear as more an apron he could wear. Peach's friend tapped her arm, muttering behind the koopa king's spiked shell, "He's really…crazy, isn't he?"

Peach shrugged. "Crazy, ridiculous, overbearing, aggressive, brash, rude…and completely unpredictable. But you know what?" She looked up at Bowser, snarling at the tight fit of the sleeves. Peach helped him rip the seams a bit more and fit it over his shoulder, taking care to hold her hand on his arm the entire time. "I don't think I'd like him to be any other way."

xxxx0o0o0o0o0o0o0xxxx

Madame Clearmont had finally assuaged her customers' fears- for now, at least- and headed back into the room with the heroes. "More Lemonade?"

Meredith smiled at her mother and shook her head. "You just gave us an entire pitcher a few minutes ago, Mom."

"Excuse me for caring," she muttered, rushing over to grab an empty plate of cookies, "but I have a room full of very nervous people and another room full of confused ones. And I need to talk to you all before you go out and get celebrated…it's quite a juggling act."

"Ma'am, do you…do you just want _me_ to…explain?" Daisy asked, her throat croaking a little. Their plan to give Mario an adventure had worked, to an extent. He was certainly in a peppier mood, but the danger had been too real and too close for Daisy's own liking. If anyone had been seriously hurt because of one of her cooky ideas…

"No, no, your highness," Madame answered with a brush of her hands. She opened the door and answered over her shoulder, "Not _that_ kind of explaining. Just be patient."

Luigi and Mario looked at each other suspiciously. Madame had been telling them to 'be patient' since they'd gotten inside from defeating the darkness. "Looks like it's-a time for another card-a game."

After what seemed like hours, and must have been, from the number of rounds of 'Go Cheep-Cheeping' they played, Madame Clearmont came back in to finally explain.

"I'm sure you're wondering," she began, "what exactly was attacking you, why it wanted to take over the dimensions, and why I knew what it was. It's…a long story. But I think you'll appreciate it."

She poured herself a glass of lemonade, poured some for the heroes, and began again. "I must commend you for _actually_ managing to defeat a force of darkness. Darkness is an element, a force of cause-and-effect as inescapable as the laws of physics or the genetic makeup of your own body. But when darkness is artificially created, it becomes something much different than nature ever intended, or would ever cause on its own accord. And what can be created can be destroyed…though usually not so simply."

"_Simply?_" Daisy interrupted. "Are you _kidding_? That think almost killed us, and the only thing that actually destroyed it was-"

"If you'd let me explain," Madame sighed, rubbing her wrinkled temples, "perhaps you'd understand why I say your methods were simple. It is not _easy_ to create an element of darkness."

"Sorry," Daisy mumbled, playing with her gloves. "You can continue."

Meredith elbowed Luigi in the side. "You make sure your girlfriend keeps quiet!" she chirped with a bit of a laugh.

Luigi rolled his eyes and nudged Mario. "What-a she said," he muttered, quiet enough that only he could hear.

Mario scowled at Luigi, then promptly turned his attention back to Madame Clearmont.

"A very, very long time ago, before Mer was even born and when I was just a teenager, I had a long-term customer, Vashda Nerada, that will always stand out in my mind. He was a scientist magikoopa…a dangerous combination if I've ever heard of one. He was probably centuries old by this time, and would always come up for the bar at the oddest hours of the night. My father had me working as a waitress, and he liked to tell me of his grandiose plans.

"He was a good man, and was always looking for a way to convenience society, one person at a time. But he was never very successful- he said that his failures were due to his equal balance of good and evil. He was specifically talented in the studies of light and darkness, and often related them to the soul. 'Darkness cannot coexist with light', he would say, 'just as one cannot be evil and good at the same time.' He would tell me that most souls had one prevailing side, whether they were mostly good or mostly evil, but that he was different, and thus was never _completely_ pleased with himself.

"He was also very lonely. When he met someone who was good and wonderful for him, he would leave her because he would decide he was too evil for her. When he met someone who was vile and impossible, he would leave her because he was too good for her. Eventually, he realized he needed someone of his _own_ makeup as a companion, one who was always with him, that he had already grown to love.

"Vashda Nerada had come to love light and darkness from observing shadows, and was particularly taken by his own. Taking from that wonderful story about the boy who never grows old, he thought his ideal companion would be his very own shadow, if he could stimulate it to life.

"He left the inn not long after that, and returned years later. Meredith was just a baby. Vashda Nerada was visibly old…in a way I had never seen before. His shadow was darker than any shadows on any other customers, and often seemed too animated for its own good. But Vashda Nerada never told me upfront that he had succeeded. The closest he ever came was his very last day of life, when he staggered down to the bar for a drink. 'I was a fool, he had said. 'One cannot expect to find both the good and the bad in just one's own darkness. Darkness is the visual representation of evil. And yet, darkness may be weak, but it is greedy, and it is persistent.' He told me he could never be free from his shadow if he remained the same form. And he didn't say anything else.

"That next morning, Vashda Nerada was not in his room, or anywhere. No one had seen him leave, no one had heard him call an incantation, and no one knew where he possibly would have gone. But his room was dark, no matter how many candles we lit."

"Mom!" Meredith interrupted, her eyes alit. "Was his room the haunted one?"

Madame groaned. "Meredith, we do _not_ say 'haunted'. Nor do we interrupt back-stories. It was _unsuitable for guests_, not 'haunted'. But you're right. We didn't let any guests into his room because when we did, they rarely came out the same. If at all. Besides, nobody wants a room with lights that won't work and windows that won't let in the sun. Eventually, we just knocked the outer wall down, which worked quite well.

"The darkness that had occupied the room was suddenly cast into an area too light for it to fill. It became a figure, just like the one you met. I don't remember exactly what happened, as I believe I…I fainted. But when I came to, my employees told me the darkness had left them, vowing to find a way to bring darkness to the horrible sun-lit world. Of course, I didn't believe them. Not for years.

"Occasionally, things would change. Important people would come to stay at the inn, customers would bring in tempting relics with world-shattering powers, or whatever else happens in this crazy world. And the lights would all go dark, the sun would go black, and the Darkness would return."

"How did you get it away?" Daisy asked, on the edge of her seat.

"We wouldn't," she answered, sighing. "We would just keep the inn as well lit as possible to shut it out, and try and have them believe it was just foul weather. Eventually, he would leave. But that first time…" she took a deep breath, looking away from her eager audience. "My husband gave up his shadow. Permanently. In exchange for him to spare our lives and leave us in peace." She ran her fingers along the tabletop. "I am certain that after centuries of a healthy life, living without a shadow is what killed off Vashda Nerada."

Meredith blinked, leaning over the table to look her mom squarely in the eye. "I thought you said dad died of cancer."

Madame sighed, clearly upset more at her own emotions actually manifesting than she was at the situation itself. "That was…easier. To explain. To both you, and the doctors. They don't have to watch many men deteriorate before their eyes just because they don't have shadows…and luckily, that's not a symptom most hospitals check for."

Mario looked from Meredith, to Madame Clearmont, and back to Meredith again. "So, I guess this-a was-a very important…to you-a both."

Madame smiled, grabbing her lemonade to try and still her shaking hand. "Yes, Mario. You may have not expected to be heroes, you may have not planned to brush this close to death, but you have put my heart at an ease it hasn't felt for years. The inn…my husband's memory…everything feels so much more _at peace_."

Daisy looked over at Luigi and squeezed his hand. "Wow," she whispered. "Maybe it's not so bad that we opened Pandora's Box."

"Don't-a get any ideas, Daisy," Luigi muttered. "I like-a my rests to be-a _relaxing_."

xxxx0o0o0o0o0o0o0xxxx

The room for physical examination of Peaches was surprisingly unlike the room Bowser had been in before. Both Peach and Bowser had been let through with their excellent and accurate answers to Peach's personality questions, though the judge seemed more willing to let Bowser through out of sheer amusement than actual admiration.

The physical examination room had each Peach led through a line, judged three at a time. Even the judges seemed to have more propriety, asking each Peach to turn, show them varying angles, and stand up straight. It seemed like they were aware any _proper_ Peach impersonator wouldn't appreciate being poked and prodded as the Bowsers were.

Luckily, judging in this room was much faster a process than the initial judging line was. The group of three in front of them were on, turning around, and off before Bowser could even make fun of their off-color wigs and incorrect heights properly. Bowser, Peach, and her friend climbed up to the podiums on their shared turn, following the directions of the judges with exactness.

They smirked at Bowser, stifling their laughter as he attempted to look as Peach-like as possible, horns poking through the wig and more tears in the apron-like dress than actual fabric. Keeping quiet was even harder when he turned around to expose his completely uncovered spiked shell and tail.

They seemed to look over Peach and her friend with much more respect, muttering among themselves for quite awhile about final decisions. Bowser and Peach glanced at each other with nervous excitement. They didn't really care about advancing, but the excitement of all the participants around them was catching. And while Bowser _knew_ he wasn't going to be _with_ Peach much longer for the competition, he wanted her to do as best as she could. It seemed to make her happy to be, quite literally, her best self.

Finally, the main judge cleared her throat. "Thank you very much, ladies…and…gentleman. You on the far left, Miss 07835, please advance to 'koopa look-a-like'. The remaining two may leave." Wait, _what_? Bowser and Peach both snapped to look to their right, Peach's friend gaping back at them with surprise. The koopa felt her golden wig and looked down at her synthetic-silk dress, then to Peach's exact "replica" look. She turned to the judges, fiddling with her gloves. "Are you _sure_? You want _me_ to advance…_just_ me?"

An intricately dressed penguin drummed his wings on the desk. "Quite sure. Please advance ahead now; we don't have time for much chit-chat."

"No!" Bowser roared. "We're not leaving until you tell us _why_ you idiots are judging this thing _blind_!"

A mouser judge chuckled, rolling her eyes at Bowser. "Sir, you look _nothing_ like Peach. The only advancing you would be doing is if we had a sarcasm bracket. Why don't you try the Bows-"

"Not me, you idiot," Bowser seethed. He tore his wig off and wrung it violently in his hand. "Obviously _I_ shouldn't advance. Peach is way prettier than I am. I'm talking about _her_!" He thrust his thumb in Peach's direction, a few sparks almost shooting out of his mouth.

"Bowser, I don't mind that much…but I am curious…." Peach honestly added, looking hard at the mouser. "No offense, but I think…I think I _am_ pretty 'close' to accurate. Close enough to advance, at least."

The mouser shook her head, hopping down with her clipboard to approach the three on the stand. "You don't understand our judging methods. While we have many detail sections that you scored quite high in, we have a few crucial pass-fail points that you, unfortunately, failed on."

"Like WHAT?" Bowser roared, drowning out Peach's same question.

"You don't have a tiara," the mouser reminded them, seeming like they should have known that all along. "Blonde hair, pink dress, tiara, and a smile are the four pass-fail sections. I'm afraid your big _friend_ here had more of a chance in advancing than you did, Miss."

"Oh," Peach muttered, feeling her tiara-less hair. "I kind of…forgot." She giggled, a bit of disappointment prevailing in her voice.

"That's STUPID." Bowser roared, his eyes shooting daggers at the mouser. "Peach doesn't _need_ her crown to be who she is. Sure, she's Princess Peach Toadstool, ruler of the Mushroom Kingdom. But she's also witty, brilliant, gorgeous, responsible, talented, kind, benevolent, forgiving, funny, stunning, and the love of my life. And she doesn't _need_ a crown to be any of those things.

"Her royalty might be what idiots like you see above everything else, but without who she _is_, it doesn't MATTER that she's royalty. I'm _none_ of those things -except the funny, talented, gorgeous part-, and I'm still royal. Does that make us the same? HECK, NO. And for you to sit there on your stupid fat rattail and say that 'royalty' is one of the most important aspects of someone like this beautiful girl next to me? I'm ashamed to even steal all your tax dollars.

"She's gone all week without one of those stupid crowns, and guess what? She's _still_ the woman I love. She's _still_ Peach. And a better Peach than you'll _ever_ find in this crap-house!"

Peach looked at Bowser, and while her face was flushed and her heart was pounding, it was only partially from flattery. "Bowser," she muttered quiet so the judge couldn't hear, "You can't give us away like that!" Her friend just gaped at him, clearly impressed but also in complete shock.

The mouser hurriedly scrawled something on her clipboard, as she had been all during Bowser's rant. She kept looking from Peach to Bowser, her eyes betraying a different kind of inspection than she had before.

Bowser looked at Peach, blinking as he calmed down and processed her words. Suddenly, he realized what he had just done and stared at the mouser, legitimate fear in his eyes.

Peach's eyes followed to the same place, and she leaned on her tiptoes to read what the mouser was scrawling. The judge now had her phone out, and was muttering about press and police. Peach's skills at reading notes from leaders, servants admirers, and kidnapper's guards served her well as she deciphered the upside-down chicken-scratch. "She knows!" She seethed, frantically meeting Bowser's eyes. This was bad. Very, very bad. A million different scenarios flashed through her head, and Peach knew she had to avoid them all. Unsure of how else to do just that, she followed her instincts.

Quickly, Peach snatched the clipboard right out of the mouser's hands, staring at her with wide-eyes in a sort of shock with herself. The mouser, Bowser, the other judges, and Peach's friend gaped at her with the same expression. Fueled with adrenaline and instincts, Peach just did what made sense- she brought down the clipboard hard on the judge's head, knocking her to the ground.

"Let's go!" Bowser roared, catching on quickly with Peach's mental state and grabbed her around the waist. It was just like kidnapping her, but with a lot less kicking. Bowser pushed through the exit door that they were supposed to go through anyway, just barely hearing the mouser get back on her feet and yell for security.

Carrying Peach with the clipboard, they ran until they go to the end of the hallway. "We have to get out of here," Bowser grunted as he let her down.

"I kind of figured that!" Peach replied, gripping Bowser's hand and pulling him to keep running. Feeling a rush of adoration, Bowser ran with the princess again, tearing down the hallways.

The shouts of the guards were getting closer, and Peach skidded to a stop, giving Bowser enough of a jerk to stop himself. "They're coming from the other way, too!" she shrieked, pointing ahead at the approaching shadows.

Bowser looked around, noticing they were at a four-way intersection. "Here," he said, pulling her into the hallway on the right. They waited on the corner for the first guards, panting as quietly as they could manage. Peach braced herself against Bowser's body, trying to compress their shadow to be as inconspicuous as possible.

The first koopatrol security guard, most likely a scout, crept along until he was practically facing the two refugees. He looked up, facing them with a sinister grin, which Bowser's fist promptly shattered. The guard fell flat down, and Bowser grabbed Peach's hand and pulled her across the hall to the other hallway. The other guards started showing up, too occupied with their fallen comrade and peering down the hallway the two had just left.

"Let's go," Bowser grumbled, and he and Peach slowly crept down their hall. They moved stealthily and silently, but as Peach turned her head to check on the preoccupied guards, she kicked an inconveniently located rubber ball, launching it into the stacked pile of empty water containers. The containers avalanche was loud enough to alert the attention of anyone on this side of the hotel, let alone the guards.

Peach couldn't help but laugh, and luckily still had her hand in Bowser's as he tore down the hallway, tugging her along. The security shouted and yelled in their pursuit; far enough away that Bowser found good reason to serpentine through halls. They went through ones leading to kitchens, cleaning closets, and eventually ended up in one lined with giant portraits.

Without warning, Bowser stopped and heaved over, Peach tugging in her effort to continue running. "Bowser?" She asked, a smile twitching at the corner of her lips at the humor of the situation. He still had a torn dress flapping around his front, which didn't exactly make things seem any more serious. Regardless, she forced her lips down and continued, "Why are you stopping?"

"Peach," he heaved, looking up weak at her. "I'm sorry, I had to take a break." He took a deep breath before straightening back up. "I don't run this fast, usually." He turned to the life-size Whomp painting before them and, with a grunt, wrenched it off. "Hold this," he grunted. Without question, she attempted to take the giant painting, even with the clipboard still in her hand. Peach wobbled as she held the ridiculously large painting, unable to see what Bowser was doing. "Get in here!" Bowser roared, his voice echoing oddly.

"That's harder than you think," she laughed, maneuvering backwards towards the sound of Bowser's voice. Finally, she felt his strong claws around her waist, and a thrill in the pit of her stomach. She let him pull her up and into his embrace, the painting sitting itself in place.

"Okay," he murmured, both to keep their location hidden and to match the intimate position they was now sitting in. "We're in a passageway that leads to a room near the main hallway. Keep quiet, and follow me." The cavern lights slowly flickered on, revealing a carpeted and very un-secret-looking passageway. The painting even appeared to have now-broken hinges.

They briskly walked through the passage, keeping quiet as they heard the security on the other side. As they started getting louder, knocking at all the paintings and swinging them open one-by-one, Bowser and Peach progressed faster. Finally, an echoic "After them!" set them in a full on run.

"Stay there for one second!" Bowser roared to Peach, forcefully halting her in place. Dramatically, he leapt and tucked into his shell and spun down the corridor until Peach could hear a crash. Splinters flew so far, she could have sworn one got stuck in her hair.

"Bowser!" she yelled, racing through the passageway and the splinters. Bowser climbed out of his shell at the end of the passageway, having managed to jump back in time to remain safe and not leave Peach alone.

"I'm fine," he grunted, accepting her hug and turning it into a safer way to jump down as one unit. With a crash, they landed almost an entire story down. They ended up in a waiting room, filled with children and government-paid babysitters, making their day a lot harder as over half the children burst into tears. "Sorry about that," Bowser laughed, "but at least we didn't _land_ on anybody."

"Bowser!" Peach scolded, ready to lecture him on respecting children more, but quickly keeping with the tone while changing the subject. "We gotta go! They're coming!"

They grabbed hands and pushed through the door, not waiting to find out how the security gathered at the edge of the passageway made their way down. "In my defense," Bowser started as they ran through yet another maze of hallways, "when I was younger the children's waiting room was two-stories high. It wasn't a jump. Some fatso must have broken the floor or something."

As Bowser and Peach pressed through to their next hallway, they stopped dead in their tracks. Apparently, one of the savvier crews of security guards apparently knew the layout of the hotel better than Bowser's memory, and they were now face-to-face.

Peach's adrenaline kicked in instantaneously, and her head swung to the side. "Hold this," she ordered, slapping the clipboard into Bowser's arms. In its place, she yanked a fire-extinguisher clean off the wall, yielding it over her head like a battle axe.

With a dramatic cry, she ran towards the security guards, bringing the extinguisher down hard on the first one's head, then swinging it with its own momentum to smack the second one in the face. She continued her rampage, kicking those who tried to get around her while attempting to swing the extinguisher.

With a laugh, Bowser commented, "Peach, that has got to be the sexiest thing-"

"Shut up and hit somebody!" Peach shouted back, continuing with as much effort and adrenaline as when she had started.

"My pleasure," Bowser laughed, quickly reverting to his natural tendencies of attack, biting, punching, scratching, and smacking all those who got in his way; he even smacked a few down with the stolen clipboard. As easy as fireballs or a ground-pound would make the situation, he didn't dare hurt Peach. Especially when she was being so _awesome_.

Soon, the group was disbanded, still in shock from Peach's initial burst of violence and nursing their wounds on the floor. Peach blinked as she looked around, and then tenderly set the extinguisher on the ground, now dented almost out of shape. Like a spring, she bounced back into normal position and grinned at Bowser. "Let's go!"

They took hands again and ran down the hallway, Peach stopping them as they passed a door marked "Coat Check Employee Entrance". "The teddy bears!" Peach gasped, pointing at the door desperately.

Bowser looked down the empty hallways and groaned, worried for their safety. Regardless, he wrenched open the door, tinkling a tiny bell as he exposed the tight hallways of closets and cubbies. "Ladies first."

Peach raced into the room, shouting Bowser commands to look one way while she looked another. The shy-guy clerk turned to face them, trying to look as intimidating as he could muster. "This is a secure location! You can't be in here! We have rules, and you need tickets! If you don't get out, I'm calling the-"

Bowser had reached the clerk and lifted him to eye-level. Stuttering behind his mask, the shy-guy attempted to finish his threat. Still not convinced he had authority, Bowser roared loud and powerfully, spittle and sparks flying onto the clerk's mask. He set him back down and glared, then ran to help Peach look.

"N-N-Never mind," the clerk muttered. "If-If-If-If you need any help, ju-ju-just ask."

"Found them!" Peach chirped, seemingly unaware of Bowser's less-than-verbose threat. She pulled the wagon out from a bottom cubby and, with Bowser's assistance, tumbled the remaining scrawny teddy bears into its bed. When they were all safe, Bowser began to pull her and the toy-filled wagon towards the door. "Wait!" she stopped him, running over to the quivering shy-guy.

Gently, Peach gave him a peck on the head. "Sorry for the scare. I promise these are ours; I might even have the ticket somewhere. But if you don't mind, we're rather in a hurry!" She kindly gave him a rub to the side of his face before taking off to Bowser. "Okay, _now_ we can go," she laughed, grabbing his free hand.

They continued running, the squeaky wagon trailing them as it flailed on a constantly shifting number of wheels. They continued to serpentine down the hallways, Bowser pointing down one on the left with added fervor. "That's a door out, and there's no security cameras!" he roared. Peach still couldn't help but laugh as they ran, getting so close to freedom from…wait, what were they running from?

Bowser spun around as they reached the big, metal door and grinned down at Peach. He was still holding the clipboard for her, and in hushed excitement said, "here we go!"

The energy was contagious, and they couldn't stop from grinning and laughing, Peach practically pacing as Bowser reached for the handle with his free hand. He dramatically turned it and- it didn't budge.

"It's locked," he murmured, saying it as if the concept had never seemed possible. "We can't go out this way!"

"And," a snarky voice added from behind, "you certainly can't go out _this_ way. You're surrounded."

Peach and Bowser turned around, eyes wide and grins gone as they faced the entire security force; several rows of angry-looking koopatrols dressed in a wave of red. Many were sporting bruises and lumps, and they looked most vicious of all.

Peach moved closer to Bowser, grabbing his hand for comfort, her grip tightening on both him and the wagon. Through the mesh of koopatrol, the mouser judge pressed to the front. She had a sneering grin on her face as she boasted, "You've got nowhere to run, nowhere to hide. And I expect to hear nothing but the truth from now on."

"Or what?" Bowser roared, hoping he could still use his natural intimidation even when his own royalty didn't do him any favors. In a cold, but direct response, the koopatrol cocked their weapons into place and took aim.

* * *

**Author's Note: **Excited? I hope so! Even if you weren't, that last bit was so much fun to write, it ended up a bit differently than expected but every bit as fun. I like hearing all your expectations for this contest, and I must say you all understand the way I usually write this story. But the contest, as I've been warning you, was kind of boring me. I think chase scenes are _much_ more exciting to read and write than waiting-in-line scenes. So, as much as I'm disappointed I don't get to deal with some of the scenes you have hypothesized, there's plenty of almost equally adorable scenes ahead.

Speaking of scenes ahead...next chapter is kind of a cool-down chapter, but it has some good content. Including Mika's 600th review present (can you really fathom 600 reviews? I know I can't...I'm sort of numb about it still, actually...), which I'm sure I'll elaborate more about next chapter. And it has a character we haven't seen for 32 chapters...even if he only has a few lines. That's always pleasant.

Oh, but before I end another disgustingly long A/N and actually go to SLEEP, I have to warn you- I'm going on vacation for 3 weeks, leaving Thursday. I have one week home which will most likely be spent preparing my summer homework before I leave for a week-long camp. I won't have access to my documents at all, though I will _try_ (try being the operative word) and pop them on Kingsley the USB Drive for random, unexpected extra time. I want to update on time, obviously, but it may be a few days late, and September's almost surely will be. So, so sorry. I had a good on-time run for the majority of summer, eh? ;)

Now that I'm about to fall asleep on my keyboard (as are you, I'm sure, from this novel of an A/N), thanks again for being the most attractive, attentive, and admirable fanfic readers I've ever heard of, freelz. C:

-Razzi


	37. Breaking Out

**Foreword: **Like I expected, I'm not done with 38 yet, but I'm going to camp tomorrow and wanted to make sure this update was on time/early...especially since poor Mika has been waiting for it since she gave the 600th review! It includes a gift to her in the first section, which many of you may not understand...basically, Mika loves Ludwig. It's all you gotta know. C:

Like I said, this is sort of a cool-down chapter, and it's not my favorite, but it's still fun. AND on time.

And please don't forget that I own nothing of worth. There's no point claiming I do or trying to steal it, because it's all Nintendo's. I don't get a CENT.

* * *

Lanky and long as his name would suggest, Frederich Longkoopa was uncomfortable enough in his chair, built for a koopa more the stature of Ludwig Von Koopa. Assuring the palace help around him that he was _not_ an enemy and was, in fact, waiting for the ever-prompt Ludwig to arrive late simply made him more uncomfortable. He ran a wrinkled hand through his hair, accidently pulling out a few withering, white strands.

Finally, almost an hour late, Ludwig ran through the door, a folder full of music under his arm. The koopa prince was panting, doubled over to catch his breath as he stuttered out apologies. Longkoopa's face was stern and hard as he stood to great the young virtuoso. "You have lateness," he muttered.

"I'm well …aware of that… and I assure you my… greatest… of apologies," Ludwig heaved in response. "My impish younger brothers…aroused a ruckus large…enough…that Kammy had to…punish us. She kept me…away."

Longkoopa seemed to sneer, waving a wrinkled hand in the air. "That is enough with the excuses. I would like to have my music, please. I am thinking you have complete."

"Of course. I hope you will find it to your satisfaction." Ludwig opened his folder and took out a new version of Longkoopa's piece, restored from memory. "My unruly brothers compromised the original with their destructive mores, but I had it committed to memory and wrote it as faultless as I could. I think you will find my version not pejorative in the least."

The withered composer took the copy and looked it over. He ran through the song in his head, noticing the intricate details Ludwig wrote into the piece. His face, usually expressing what would seem to be cruelty, looked honestly disappointed. "Ludwig Von Koopa…this is not my copy. I have tell you to write on my copy."

"I know…I told you, it was compromised…_destroyed_. Covered in chocolate. Illegible. Completely worthless."

"Worthless?" Longkoopa shook his head, still disappointed in Ludwig. "You are a great musician, Ludwig Von Koopa. Never music is worthless. Never originals is worthless. Each part of process of music is important. There are no mistakes, there are lessons learned."

Ludwig ran a claw through his hair, stung by Longkoopa's hurt. "I know, I know…but the music…here, I have it with me still. You can see for yourself. This is an imbroglio I had never dreamed of, I hope you understand…" he warned before opening his folder yet again. With a great sigh, Ludwig pulled out the true original. Completely coated in chocolate, there were only seven or eight measures on any page that were legible at all, most blurred at best. The pages were stiff from the dry chocolate, and left spots on his fingers from just the lightest of touch.

"You see? A complete ignominy." Lovingly, Longkoopa set Ludwig's copy to the side and reached out to take his own. His face lit up.

"Ludwig, _this_ is music. She is random, she is unexpected, she is bad. Music is art, and art has that cannot plan. I asked many musicians for to help with this song. Not just you, Ludwig Von Koopa. I have hope to put all parts together to find the _real_ heart of song.

"This paper you gave to me the first, he is sad. He is expected, understood, and very boring. Ludwig, you are _trained_. That is the why you are well, that is the why you are bad. The paper you gave to me the first has of rules. You say, 'there are rules in music'. But there is not. Music exist for many, many years before people say 'there are rules'. Music exist before people say _anything_. The wind has music, the birds has music, and plus the ocean has music. None of these have rules."

Ludwig smiled, taking Longkoopa's awkward explanation as not a criticism, but an insight into a great musician's mind. "But Longkoopa…if you don't use rules, how can you expect the music to sound good?"

Longkoopa lifted a hand, now coated in chocolate, off his original. He placed it to his chest. "If she is come from here, she is going to _be_ good. Because you are smart here," he tapped his skull, leaving a chocolate streak in his white, wispy hair, "she will _sound_ good. You see? Your rules can have helpfulness, but the first is needs be the heart, the random, the nature. You needs be have faith."

The aging musician pulled out his other copies of the song and looked through them, humming some indistinct melody. The chocolate one stood out from the others like a sore thumb, but Longkoopa treated it with all the same respect. He even put Ludwig's second copy in the pile.

Watching him work, Ludwig felt something stirring in him that he hadn't felt for years. This was the composer he had learned to love music from, the first other person he'd ever met who seemed to understood music flowed so naturally within oneself as the blood in their veins. Ludwig supposed that even if his accent was more pronounced and his syntax worse, he would still understand Longkoopa better than he understood any other person on the planet. Oh, if he could just watch him work a little longer!

"Come see, come see," Longkoopa urged, waving Ludwig over. "You needs be have faith," he repeated. "I am going to play the paper of chocolate for you hear." He picked up the chocolate pieces and placed them on Ludwig's honored piano. Then, without even wiping his fingers, began to turn each pristine, white key he touched a filthy, chocolate brown.

And yet, Ludwig was so caught up in the music that he could not even imagine caring about the well-being of his piano. All he could care about was the beautiful sounds.

Longkoopa took the measures that the chocolate had spared and combined them, layered them on top of one another, and translated the blurs into a piece of music three times more beautiful than the piece had originally been. And even better than what Ludwig had recreated. "Faith is not bad, huh?" Longkoopa asked as he finished. He smiled. "Do you have understanding now, Ludwig Von Koopa?"

He was going to answer when a goombamaid rushed in the door. "Your most belovedness, Prince Ludwig!"

Ludwig sighed and glared over at the maid. "I'm currently engaged in a very important duty, Goomda. I don't have time for your feckless announcements."

"But we've received a very unique request from a fan of yours, sire! One we thought you should look into…for security reasons."

"Fanboys?" Longkoopa asked, amused.

"No," Ludwig replied, shuddering. "Fan_girls_. Much worse." He begrudgingly hopped off the bench and trod over to Goomda. "What does she enquire after? Surely an autograph should appease her whims…"

"Your brilliance, she requested to have you…as a pet."

"What?" Ludwig asked, outraged.

"And she attached a rather…generous…bribe, sire. It was actually addressed to your father, but as he's out, we took it upon ourselves to check his mail."

"Good thing," Ludwig muttered, looking over the letter and the seeming endless 0's in the check. "Father probably would find this most attractive of offers… Why would she want me as a _pet_?"

"I'm not sure, sire. But she also attached a list of credentials and character references…apparently wanted to put in a 'good word' in case the bribe wasn't convincing enough. And there are also a few thinly-veiled threats for kidnapping…security is looking into them but we're not certain she's backed."

"Good heavens!" Ludwig sighed, running a claw through his enormous hair. "I assume they've affirmed it not to be a jape? Perhaps a moment of appalling choice birthed from a frisson?"

"Um…" the goomba bit her lip, clearly a bit embarrassed by her own lack of understanding. "They're…checking."

Longkoopa walked over and looked at the letter. "Funny," he chuckled, "I have receive letter like this. This letter- she have include a bribe, a lot of fluffy words, and the hairs. _Blue_ hairs, of actual." He laughed at the memory. "But I am thinking the letterer was of very youth. Of obvious, I never had oblige. And my English had worseness to now, so I was not understanding much. But now, I have forget the name of letterer…"

Ludwig's eyes, as wide as saucers, glanced at his idol from the side. He forced a laugh out as his grip on the letter tightened. "Yeah, that's…that's funny. Who would do that? Let's…um…go back to the song now." To himself, Ludwig prayed the composer never realized he was the only koopa those years back who could find his address, afford such a bribe, and happened to sport blue hair. And to himself, he thanked the forces that be for the old koopa's memory problems.

xxxx0o0o0o0o0o0o0xxxx

Peach kept her grip on Bowser's claw so tight; she imagined that even beneath her white glove, her hand was probably the same shade. "Bowser," she squeaked out of the side of her mouth, "what are we going to do _now_?"

Bowser looked hard at the security guards, their weapons pointed down at the royals. The mouser seemed to be saying something, but Bowser was too busy fighting down his battle-mode and honing his escape mode to actually pay attention. His eyes flickered from the koopatrols to the locked door they stood by, forming a plan. "Do you trust me?"

Peach eagerly looked at Bowser's stern face, willing to protect not only her life, but her cruel desire to keep her identity from everyone who could ever connect her to Bowser. He would put his life down just so she could be happy…of _course_ she trusted him! "Always," she answered, closing her eyes tight.

Bowser dramatically tore off the Peach dress he had been sporting, now flayed and torn all over. After thrusting it to the ground, Bowser grabbed Peach tight to his chest. In quick succession, he jumped surprisingly high into the air, coming down with a rumble so fierce, all the koopatrols fell onto their shells, knocking the mouser flat on her face. Bowser kept Peach tight and roared as he lifted a foot, dramatically barreling into the locked door.

The door clattered as Bowser's sheer force knocked it out of its frame, and they continued to barrel into the alley. Peach screamed in both fear and delight, the wagon haphazardly flying after them, bears tumbling out as they went. They crashed into a dumpster at the other end of the alley, Bowser's pointed shell denting it into a cave around them, Peach impacting against Bowser's chest with an "oof".

"Are you okay?" He asked, releasing his tight grip on Peach.

"Yeah, I'm fine…I'm perfectly fine."

"Then help me," he mumbled, standing up and pulling her towards the door. Inside the hotel, most of the koopatrols and the mouser were all mumbling around, rubbing their heads as they tried to come-to. A few of the better-off koopatrols were feebly waving their limbs, shouting for help as they rocked back and forth on the back of their shells.

Easily, Bowser lifted up the heavily-dented door, tossing it to get a better grip on it and prop it into a frame. Snarling, Bowser punched the door to un-dent the dent best he could. "We have to move fast, before they get back up. I need you to hold this, please," he asked, waiting for Peach to take the door so it didn't fall. She ran up to it and held it in place, pushing on it with all her might. "This might be a little hot, Peachy…" he warned.

Bowser blew fire in a concentrated line, right along the door's outer edge. The metal in the door and in the doorframe welded together, sealing the guards out until they could get a wrecking-ball…or go the long way around. The door _did_ heat up, but Peach was determined to help Bowser. She was glad to have gloves on…but even with the added protection, her fingers felt like they were blistering.

"Done!" He chirped, stepping back to admire his handiwork.

"Thank goodness," Peach muttered, yanking her hands off. She looked at them as unassumingly as she could, noticing her gloves had burned right through to her fingertips, each blistered and burnt.

"Peach, what's wrong with your hands?" Bowser asked, noticing her gaze.

"Nothing!" she answered, quickly shoving them behind her.

"No! Give me your hands!" he ordered, trying to grab them. Quickly, it became a sort of game as she giggled, refusing to let him see them and pulling them out of reach. But soon, Bowser won and got a hold of her hands. "Peach…" he muttered, his heart break evident in his voice.

"It's fine," she assured him, "it's nothing."

"This doesn't look like nothing," Bowser corrected, trying to better understand the burn. He ran his fingers over them, watching her twitch as she tried to pull away from the pain.

"Bowser, don't worry about it," Peach moaned, more pain coming from watching Bowser fuss over her fingers than the burns themselves. "We can get someone to magick them up tonight. There's nothing to do now."

"Well…" Bowser whined, holding her hands as lightly as he could.

"Do you want to kiss them better?" Peach asked with a giggle.

Bowser looked up at her, his face lit up like a Christmas tree. "Do you want me to?"

Peach smiled back. She missed that eager look he gave her! "If you'll stop fussing, that'll make me feel a _lot_ better."

"So you want me to kiss you?"

Peach laughed inside, closing her eyes. How was she supposed to answer that? "I want you to kiss it better, yeah…sure."

Bowser grinned, his grip on her hands tightening a bit. "Okay. Tell me if your lips ever hurt," he added, making Peach laugh, before he bent down. With surprising sweetness, he kissed each finger. His lips were big enough that one kiss probably could have sufficed, but it seemed Bowser wouldn't give up this chance for the world.

And as Peach stood there in the dirty alley, Bowser bent down and kissing her fingertips, she really didn't mind at all.

His lips were on her last index finger when they heard excited, anxious voices around the corner. One that sounded unsurprisingly like the mouser judge's. Bowser quickly finished pecking those last two fingers and grabbed Peach's wrist, avoiding contact with her burnt fingertips.

Together, they ran back to the best hiding spot they could find in the corner behind the dumpster. Peach rolled the wagon of bears over near them, Bowser sitting in the corner and Peach snuggling as tight to him as they could. Their shadows mingled in the darkness cast by the dumpster, and they held their breath, listening to the people around the corner approach.

"-and once we can get a firm grip on them, we'll have more proof than we ever need."

"More proof of _what_? You've told me a thousand times that we _need_ to catch them. But why, exactly?"

"I thought our security guards contacted you about this."

"They just told me you had a problem with some participants at the Cause-Play. Who apparently…stole your clipboard?"

"Yes, well…hold on, they should be down this alley."

There was silence. As much as Peach and Bowser wanted to look around the corner -the voice with the mouser judge sounded suspiciously familiar- they knew this was the most important time to stay completely silent. Footsteps. The two people were getting closer.

"They should be around here…somewhere…" the mouser muttered, getting anxious. She walked closer, her companion a few footsteps ahead.

Peach and Bowser could see his shoes, and though they held their breath, he looked a little too close for comfort. But quickly, he spun around to face the mouser.

"That's it. They're not here. You're wasting government funds by having me over here to look for some clip-board thieves."

"No! No, no! That's not the real problem. They're…they're really…ooh, you won't believe me until we find them!"

"Try me!"

"Okay, well…" the mouser took a deep breath before continuing. "I was trying to apprehend them and keep them contained before they escaped. Because they're actually…actually…"

"Spit it out."

"They actually _are_ Peach and Bowser. The real ones!" The mouser's frantic cry was met with silence. Then, a sputtered laugh. From behind the dumpster, Bowser and Peach both let out their breath in a sigh. For good measure, Bowser gave Peach another squeeze.

The government aid cleared his throat, silencing any ideas the mouser had of explaining herself. "I was called out of business. Called out of the Volcanopalace _itself_ to see to 'important affairs at the Cause-Play'. I come, and what do I find? A judge who _should_ be judging, and is instead playing some ridiculous wild-goose chase game with a squadron of unqualified koopatrols. And what are they looking for? What has caused all this mishap and confusion? Why, she thinks she's found Bowser and Peach. The real ones. In a look-alike contest. Has it _ever_ occurred to you, miss, that they might just LOOK LIKE THEM?"

To emphasize the last words, the government aid smacked her over the head with whatever he had in his hand. "All I can tell that they've done, besides waste a lot of time for a bunch of fools, is steal a clipboard. And that is _not_ worth my time."

"They…they also ruined the-" Bowser and Peach could see the mouser's hand pointing at the door, shoddily repaired by Bowser's welding skills. Then, they also saw three shapes flying at it; a triangle, a square, and a circle. The shapes hit the door and with a blue poof, repaired it. Bowser blinked. He was pretty sure who that government aid happened to be.

"Um…" The mouser mumbled, feeling herself shrink.

"I suggest you get back to judging before I contact your supervisor," the government aid added smugly. With an audible swoosh, the mouser ran out of the alley. Bowser and Peach stayed in the shadows, waiting for the aid to leave. "And to you," he muttered, speaking to the 'empty' alley. "I suggest you lay a bit lower. You leave any more body-shaped dents around and I won't want to be the one explaining. Have a good evening, your vileness." With another poof, Kamek was gone.

Bowser and Peach laughed, and laughed, forgetting for awhile that they were in an alley, behind a dumpster, and that they'd gotten into this mess by doing exactly what they weren't supposed to be doing for their image. The laughter subsided, and Peach stayed close to Bowser.

"Are you okay?" he asked again, softer this time.

"Bowser," she laughed, "If you ask me that any more times, I'm going to think something is wrong with _you_!"

Bowser chuckled, playing with her hands. "Okay. But do your fingers hurt?"

"Not too bad," Peach answered. "I think your kisses helped!"

"Anytime," Bowser smirked. "Are you comfortable?"

"Actually," she responded, snuggling closer. "You're softer than I expected."

"Really?" Bowser asked, looking down at her, his face almost in her hair.

"Yeah," she sighed, finding his chest to be ridiculously comfortable. Defined, but mostly soft. "I could stay here aaaaall evening."

"Mmmm," Bowser agreed, wrapping his arms securely around her. "But as much as I would really, _really_ love just sitting here next to a pile of trash, holding an angel in my arms, we'll never get to dinner."

"Hmm…tempting."

"Speaking of that…what do you want?"

"For dinner? You want me to choose?"

"Yep," Bowser answered as sweet as he could. "I want you to choose. Plus, it's your turn for the relationship…thingy."

"It is?" Peach asked, sitting up eagerly. She got a wicked look on her face. Peach jumped out of Bowser's arms and grabbed the wagon of bears. She put out a hand for him to grab, burnt fingers and all. "Let's go!" Bowser took her hand as carefully as he could, but still stood up mostly on his own. "We've got some new friends to make, secret-lover of mine."

"That again?" Bowser asked, grinning.

"Oh no, not quite," Peach replied with an air of deceit. "This time…we're much more single."

"Then why is it a secret?" They started to leave the alley, the wagon innocently toting behind them, waiting for Peach to hand out the bears.

"Think _Romeo and Juliet_ without the tragic ending," she explained. "Star-crossed lovers, separated by only the wills of our parents, raging in a war of tradition and misunderstandings. Doomed to see each-other only in terror and chance meets."

"So…exactly like our real lives?"

"What?" Peach asked, laughing. "What fantasy world are _you_ living in?"

Bowser chuckled, intertwining his beefy fingers with her dainty ones. "The thing is, all my fantasies are _exactly_ like my real life right now. I mean, one or two exceptions…but they're not _that_ major."

"Like what?"

"You haven't kissed me yet, or told me you love me, and we're not married." Bowser paused, thinking hard. "That's really the only difference."

"Really?" Peach inquired, a bit more curiosity lingering in her voice than levity.

"And there's no giant pools full of hot fudge sundaes," Bowser added with a serious nod.

"Oh really?"

"Yeah really. You can't have a fantasy world without giant pools full of hot fudge sundaes."

"What about grass fields of cotton candy?"

Bowser scrunched up his face, sticking out his tongue. "No way. That's so impractical. The sun would shine on them, and then it would just get all sticky and melt and it wouldn't hold its shape for a second. Picnics would be ridiculously impossible. Rolling down hills would be torturous. And there would be _way_ too many bees."

"But pools of hot fudge sundaes would be fool-proof, right? The ice cream would never melt; the hot fudge would never cool down?"

"Obviously," Bowser sneered. "It's temperature-maintained for a perfect balance of hot and cold. And you can swim in it _or_ eat it."

"Oh," Peach laughed. "How could I possibly forget?"

"No idea."

xxxx0o0o0o0o0o0o0xxxx

As Mario, Luigi, and Daisy climbed into the princess' yellow jeep, the entire town seemed to be gathered in the parking lot to wish them bon voyage. They waved out the window, chorusing goodbyes for several minutes while Daisy patiently (or as patiently as she ever could manage) waited for their path to clear.

The crowd was full of thrilled onlookers, most appearing to have no idea of what had just happened the past day or so, but eager to be involved in some sort of newsworthy events anyway. Through the masses, Madame Clearmont and her daughter, Meredith, stood waving almost as frantically at the top of the inn's porch.

Finally, they got onto the road and the jeep got up to better speeds, kicking up dust and gravel. They laughed amongst themselves, relatively quiet for a few minutes. Mario was sitting by himself in the backseat, Luigi holding Daisy's right hand while her left drummed the top of the steering wheel. Mario's own hands were occupied as he fiddled a piece of paper- a napkin, rather.

Meredith had scrawled her phone number on it for him. While Mario assumed he would plug it into his phone, perhaps call her once and then never again as he did with so many other female fans, it bothered him a bit more. He didn't _want_ to just call her once. Her friendship, her kinship, her…whatever relationship they seemed to have…he was going to miss that. Mario didn't dare compare it to Peach- that relationship was untouchable, not to mention indefinable. But the most bothering part of the Meredith problem was something he never had to deal with in his relationship with Peach.

He'd didn't feel like he _needed_ to see Meredith ever again. But he still wanted to have Daisy turn her jeep around and invite her to a game of tennis. Or baseball. Or maybe just a walk around the inn and a pasta dinner. Or maybe just to see if she wanted to be his friend.

Of course, Mario considered, she _was_ just another girl at the end of an adventure. He was sure this fascination would dim with time, and the next adventure would have another cast of new friends for him to think about seeing again. And maybe, if that cast always remained constant, he _would_ see those girls again, outside the realms of peril.

Maybe that's why he was so committed to Peach.

It was all too confusing! _Relationships spoil perfectly good adventures_, he decided. Mario groaned, realizing too late it was out-loud.

"What's-a wrong, Mario?" Luigi asked, looking back at his brother. "Car sick al-a-ready?"

"No, Luigi," he replied. "Just-a…thinking."

"About-a the adventure?"

"Knowing Mario," Daisy interjected, "probably about pasta."

Mario chuckled. "Actually, not-a this time. Just-a thinking about…my…friends."

Luigi gave a half-smile, barely noticeable under his moustache. "Do you miss-a them?"

"Si," Mario answered, deciding it was the best way to be as honest as he could without bothering the happy couple with his confusion.

Daisy dramatically sighed. "It must be hard, I guess. I mean, I've got delegate 'friends' and all, but I have to see them at least twice a year. And you guys live a kingdom away, but again- we all have the means and time to see each other. I basically _live_ in the Mushroom Kingdom, after all. But you, Mario. You meet all these crazy people from all over the world, and they probably all go around telling their friends 'oh, I'm besties with Mario.' 'Mario slept in my bed one night- we're like _this_!' 'You should hear what Mario ate when he was staying with me- it's a good thing we're such good friends.'. And you hardly ever see anybody ever."

"Si," Mario answered, quietly.

"Hey, at-a least you get to see Princess-a Peach for all-a next week, si?" Luigi suggested, smiling back at him. "That's-a good for you and-a your friend issue."

Mario closed his eyes, considering how very far from the truth that actually was. His 'friend issue' was just more complicated when he through in his 'more-than-friends' friend. Yet, all he had the heart to answer was, "si".

In the front seat, Daisy shook her head. Quietly enough that only her boyfriend could hear, she muttered, "Mario's such a boring brother sometimes. I wish he had more interesting things to say when his life actually _is_ interesting _all the time_."

"I think-a he does," Luigi replied, just as quietly. "But-a Mario…he likes to-a stay quiet to keep-a himself sane. He doesn't-a like to push his-a problems on other-a people."

"He doesn't have to _push_," she commented. "Just share."

Luigi chortled, squeezing Daisy's hand. "And when-a was the last-a time you have-a seen Mario _ever_ share?"

Daisy laughed. Quietly, she answered, "Pasta and secrets are _not_ the same thing."

"Eh," Luigi began, narrowing his eyes. "They come in-a all shapes and-a sizes, can be topped with-a most anything, and are-a best suited _inside_ you. Sounds about-a the same to me."

She chuckled, rolling her eyes. "You're ridiculous, little Mr. Luigi Mario. Completely ridiculous."

"But you-a love me!" Luigi protested.

"Which makes it all the more ridiculous." She smiled at him. Luigi grinned back. And from the backseat, Mario just chuckled…silently.

xxxx0o0o0o0o0o0o0xxxx

Going over menu plans was _not_ one of Toadsworth's favorite activities, but it had to be done, especially with the return of Peach so soon. It was just so frustrating, seeing as no one else at the castle understood the value of a good crumpet or the absolute necessity of a cup of tea with every meal.

"Toadsyworther, what do you think about this?" Har T asked, grunting as he lifted a rather thick book onto the table with an unsettling _boom_. It seemed like a lot of work for a toad of his girth.

"Bloomin' Bub-ulbs, what is this; the Encyclopedia Mushanica: Food Edition?"

"Naw," Har grinned, flipping it open through several almost identical pages of full-length color images. "It's my inspiration book. My wifey wanted to go into food photography once, so she took millions o' pictures o' my favorite meals. Never got past binding the family's copy- too much work for the little lady." He stopped on a particularly pink page, a salmon flank covered in sweet strawberry sauce, lined with what appeared to be peaches soaked in watermelon juice. "I call it 'Pink Paradise' or 'island-tasting-food-for-people-who-live-in-the-middle-of-the-country-with-nothin'-but-streams-bushes-an'-too-much-time'. What do you think, Toadsyworther?"

"I think we ought to go with the first name, wot."

"But do you think Peach will like it? I mean, if you do, we have to start preparing it pretty dang soon…watermelon-flavored-peaches are a bit tricky to do in a minute."

"Well, you _have_ a full 'nother week, sah."

"What?" Har grumbled, his cheeky grin fading for the first time since they started talking. "My little princess isn't coming home on Saturday?"

"Well, she _is_, theoretically. By George, did you not know? She's meeting Mario at the airport at noon tomorrow. They're leaving from there to bop off to Grand Canal pip-pip."

"Really?" he whined. "I knew that, but I thought…she was coming home for just a bit…" he sighed, flipping the page to look at the same meal in a different lighting. "I suppose we can bring her a plate at the airport."

"I don't think that's necessa-"

"Toadsworth!"

Toadsworth spun around, seeing flashes of pink-and-white through the glass circle in the kitchen door. Even though Peach was the only one in the castle tall enough to see through the window properly, the toads insisted to always keep it there to honor her. Something that wasn't exactly suitable to Toadette at the moment. "Oh, bugger…" he seethed.

"!"

"Excuse me, sah," he muttered, hobbling over to the door and opening it.

Toadette raced in, almost knocking Toadsworth off his balance in her rush to the counter. She grabbed a television remote, pointed at the TV inconspicuously in the kitchen corner, and began muttering to herself as she flipped channels. "Har T, are _all_ the channels either Mushroom Meal Channel or TSPN?"

Finally, she reached her desired channel, a bubbly pianta and her toad co-anchor gossiping about whatever 'news' they had just told- something involving a Dino-Rhino and a Blaarg.

"Really, poppet? You rushed in here to show me the Entertainment channel?"

"Not the channel, Toadsworth. The news _on_ it. It's about Peach!"

"It's always about Peach, m'lady! You know that. We have toads whose entire livelihood is made off of screening this channel!"

Toadette grumbled, continuing to direct her full attention to the pianta on screen. Finally, she began speaking to the audience again, a box with a blurred Peach face popping next to her and above the toad. "And again," the pianta began, "I'd like to remind you all that the Peach Peepers are setting their sights on the mysterious happenings in the fabled world of cos-play, otherwise known as costume-play or look-alike contests. Our field reporters have heard information from multiple sources that a very large event is being held in Bowser's secret empire, under the façade of being a charity event. This look-alike for a cause…or maybe they call it cause-cos-play… is full of people who look just like Princess Peach. Our sources spotted suspicious activity with two of the leading look-alikes, confirming that Princess Peach is indeed WITH Bowser, gallivanting through the secret empire's attractions."

"SEE, Toadsworth?" Toadette chirped, jumping up and down. "I might be right! She might love him!"

"…wait, what?"

Toadette continued bobbing up and down, her pigtails waving frantically as she tried to explain what to her seemed so obvious. "Peach and Bowser are together at a party participating in suspicious activity which obviously means they've been secretly together her whole vacation; probably because they're in love!"

"You sound more bloomin' outrageous than those daft blokes on the telly!"

"No, Toadsworth!" She stopped hopping to sputter a further explanation. "They find their information from reputable sources. _Entertainment News_ is always ahead of the curve…and their information happens to line up with _our_ information at the moment!"

"You're _really_ going to believe that cogswallop, m'dear? How do you know one of their ridiculous spies didn't make all this up on the blinkin' spot? And if not, you know it's just some rumor they heard and happen to like, wot wot. They find rumors, expand them, fill them with hot air, and let them float wherever they may go. That's not bloomin' news _or_ entertainment! And you know better than to believe them, dearie. Just last week this blathering 'Peach Patrol' or whatever they call themselves said she was marrying an alien in the center of the universe in order to reverse the effects of some chaotic star...or chaotic heart or something."

"But _sometimes_, they're right, Toadsworth! And we don't know where Peach is- maybe she IS with Bowser, gallivanting through the secret empire's attractions."

Toadsworth grumbled, raising his staff to point at the television and make another point about _cogswallop_, but fell silent as the screen's image changed to Mario, a heart, and a silhouette. "Now, what's this?"

"Nothing!" Toadette squealed, fumbling with the remote again. "I've seen these reels twice now- it's nothing, really. Oh, dear!" She squeaked as the remote slipped out of her hands. In her rush to turn it off, she managed to turn it _up_, the toad co-anchor's voice drowning out even Toadette's squealing excuses.

"And in other news, Mario is being just as unfaithful as his lovely Princess Peach. Whilst on a secret mission with Luigi at a 'plumbing convention' understood to be an elaborate cover-up for the JKF conspiracy, he has found love. The two were seen together both at the government facility 'convention' as well as at a secluded inn, making plans to wed. The identity of his-"

With a hiss, the television went black. Toadette's face was brighter than her pink cap, and she mumbled something incoherent.

Toadsworth smirked in her direction. "Well, poppet, how do you feel about that? I suppose Peach isn't your competition at all. I suppose-"

"It's nothing but cogswallop," Toadette announced, her mouth a hard line.

"S'what I thought."

A harsh silence filled the room, Toadette not daring to move her eyes from Toadsworth's.

"Well, then," Har T. interrupted, "I suppose I should make enough Pink Paradise for two extra, right?"

Toadsworth scrunched his eyebrows together in confusion, turning slowly to the toad cook. "Wha-what?"

"Pink Paradise. To bring to Peach and Mario at the airport. I can't leave their secret lovers out, right?"

"Err….right, sah. Right you are. Can't leave anybody out on your charming fish n' chips…I'm sure that would break their hearts."

* * *

**Author's Note: **So that character I promised you haven't seen...nobody guess Har T. :D He wasn't very memorable, but it was fun to pull his chapter out again and reminisce on the days of 6 page chapters. :)

And next chapter isn't much longer than THAT yet, but so far it's pretty fun. Got some fluff (which everyone likes), some appearances that entertain me and hopefully will entertain you, and also a bit that I have to warn you is a little bit crazy. I love mariowiki TOO much, and the intertwining I find there...well, I could probably write entire fanfics based on that site. So watch out; I let out my crazies on the poor koopalings. And I'm not sure what else it'll include...I'll write it when I get home.

School starts next month, so that might add to my already forecasted lateness, but here's to a hope in the positive direction!

-Razzi


	38. For a Bit of Culture

**Foreword: **I'm late, just like I promised I would be. I'm latER than I had hoped and 39's not quite done yet, but I didn't want to make you guys wait longer for a rather uneventful chapter.

You don't need to wait ANY LONGER. So be aware I don't own Nintendo or its characters and I hope you enjoy.

* * *

The phone-booths in downtown Darklands were _much_ too small to accommodate two people, especially when one was a giant Koopa King with a shell that was alone larger than the doorframe. And yet, as cramped as it was, Bowser _insisted_ on joining Peach as she stood in the phone-booth. He certainly didn't mind leaving the wagon of teddy bears to fend for itself on the sidewalk.

"This doesn't really work," she reminded him with a laugh. Peach was crunched into a corner, the phonebook she clutched pressed against the wall. She shouldn't have been able to fit between the phone and the glass wall, but it was the only spot of room Bowser wasn't attempting to occupy.

Bowser growled an inaudible reply, deciding to try a more head-on approach. He took off on a short-distance run, his shell edges catching on the iron doorframe. With a grunt and a surprised expression on his face, he helplessly flailed his limbs.

She cracked up, clutching onto the phonebook to support herself. Bowser's glare lightened at her laughter. He couldn't stay grumpy around her bell-like laugh, her bright countenance. Still stuck in place, Bowser managed a chuckle. "Alright," he said with a gentle smile. "Could you help me out of here before I become the laughing-stock of the town?"

Peach looked at Bowser's position, his arms, legs, and head locked into quite the embarrassing position; one that, in fact, looked just like a laughing-stock. "Sure," she giggled. Peach set the phone-book, chained unfortunately to the booth, back on the shelf. She worked with Bowser, gently directing the manners for him to twist himself out and directing his motions with her own hands. Ignoring the swooping sensation in her stomach, Peach focused on easing Bowser out of the booth as quickly and the least embarrassingly as possible.

"It's a good thing nobody really recognizes me," Bowser moaned once he'd finally gotten loose, careful not to slip on the wagon and heighten his embarrassment. "Although if anyone's backside has to be stuck in a booth on display for the entire street, best be a hot one."

Peach laughed, shaking her head. "But if you weren't so determined to stand in the same box as me, it would have worked out just fine."

"I thought you wanted to have me help you choose a place!" He asked, plopping on the ground in front of the doorway. He pouted, looking a lot like an overgrown toddler.

"I do," she replied, not seeing Bowser as she went to grab the phonebook. She pulled it as close to the door and Bowser's view as the chain would allow. "But if you knew more than one restaurant _outside_ your palace, we wouldn't have even needed a phonebook."

After sitting in the middle of the sidewalk for a bit, Peach safely inside her phone-booth and Bowser doing his very best to ignore the Darklandians whose path he was in, they made their choice. "Flurrie's Finest Entertainment and Eats" had attracted their attention, as Peach recognized the female figure overtaking most of the ad.

"I'd better call ahead and make sure it's good enough for you, Peachy…" Bowser growled. "A lot of the entertainment in this town isn't exactly…what you're used to."

"I'd noticed," Peach agreed, her thoughts resting on some of the ads they were quick to skip over. Even their yellow-page spots seemed risqué and, as Bowser put it, 'not what she was used to'. "I'm not too worried about Flurrie. She may be…intense…but she always said she wanted to reach as many audiences as possible."

"I'm still calling ahead," Bowser reminded her. "Besides, we have to figure out when we should go. I don't know if we have to have those reservation…things."

Peach stood up, keeping the phone-book in her arm. "Actually, I think _I_ should be the one to call," she quipped.

"What? Why not me?" Bowser whined, standing up and grabbing her arm.

"Because," she laughed, having difficulty keeping her focus as she felt Bowser's grip. He wouldn't let go, most likely because he was enjoying that same sensation that Peach was having trouble ignoring. "You don't _fit_ in here. We don't need another laughing-stock fiasco."

"Well," Bowser muttered, beginning to drop his grip so she could go to the phone. "Good point."

Peach smiled, taking her hand and putting it on Bowser's face for both added effect and for her own amusement. "That's a good boy."

xxxx0o0o0o0o0o0o0xxxx

It wasn't quite sundown, but the polluted air around Peach and Bowser shone orange and red. With this added effect, the marquee over them seemed even more grand and ostentatious, but Bowser and Peach weren't paying it any mind. There were paying much more attention to the ticket list in front of them, advertising them many options for combinations of shows, meals, shows with meals, just dessert bars, different show times, seats, and backstage packages.

The boo running the ticket booth sighed dramatically, bobbing up and down as she waited for them to hurry up and decide. There were a few people in line behind them and their wagon of bears, but the ridiculous amount of combinations and options seemed to perplex them as well.

"We could go to the show at 7:00," Peach offered, "and then get the meal with it…and a seat on the third row."

"No, that doesn't work," Bowser groaned. They had gone through this process too much for his liking- it reminded him far too much of boring meetings. He supposed that if Peach wasn't the diplomat he was collaborating with, he would have stormed away in a hissy fit fifteen minutes ago. "They only offer the meals in rows 1, 5, and 10 and back."

"But the first row is taken," Peach muttered, "and rows 1-5 are for backstage pass holders only-"

"And the backstage stuff started at 5:30," Bowser finished.

"Well," Peach tried, biting the inside of her cheek. "Let's go back to the recorded show option at 6:30. We could get a fifth row seat. That way, we get the meal, the backstage pass, the show, and we have time afterwards, since it's a shorter show."

"Then we still have a few hours to do something else!" Bowser announced.

"But what would we do?" Peach asked, much more curious to herself than accusing. "We already decided that it wouldn't be smart to go back to the Cause-Play…"

Bowser laughed, nodding. They had discussed quite a few times beforehand about the fiasco they had caused at the contest, as well as how much of a chance Bowser had to win and the complete ridiculousness of the decision against Peach. They even discussed the drama they would cause by _re_entering, especially if those security guards were watching every entrance as they expected they were. Koopatrol rarely quit their focus, even if they didn't understand their job or its ridiculous nature- that's why Bowser liked using them so much. But what they _hadn't_ discussed at length were their real reasons for not wanting to return to the contest.

Remembering the excruciating time apart was bad enough for Bowser. He knew that repeating the situation in the finals would be far worse. And Peach was thinking almost the same thing. Snapping back to their conversation of what to do, Bowser added, "I dunno. We'll think of something…but Peachy, didn't you say you wanted to come to see that Flurrie chick?"

"Yes…well…seeing a recorded Flurrie would be just as fun. She's not exactly the best company in person anyway; I don't mind."

"You wouldn't prefer her in person? I mean, it makes more sense to go with the 6:30 prerecorded show, but-"

"Let's do the prerecorded one then," Peach agreed, brightly. "6:30, fifth row." She turned to the boo and opened her mouth to ask.

"That won't work," the boo said before she had the chance to say anything. "The prerecorded shows don't offer meals to anyone but the first three rows, and those are taken." She blinked slowly at their exasperated expressions. "You'll have to try again."

"It would be _easier_ if you would _help us_," Bowser snarled at the boo.

She was completely unlike any boo that Peach had previously met, neither shy nor intense and seemed much more like she was simply bored with her afterlife. "Not in the job description," she sighed. Peach was certain that, had she fingernails, she'd be filing them.

Just then, the theatre doors swung open and a large, floating, purple wind spirit with over exaggerated womanly features burst through. She was trailed by at least thirty eager fans, clutching notebooks and cameras. "And here," she sang, "is the façade of our lovely theatre. Of course you all have seen this beautiful sight before, while you were waiting in line like these poor sou- ohh, my!"

Flurrie, the purple spirit with hair to rival Ludwig's, floated over to Bowser and Peach with her backstage pass fans trailing her. She put out a hand for Bowser and Peach to shake, which was surprisingly more solid than not. "Lovely to see such _dedicated_ fans of our royalty interested in the fine arts as well. Costuming is a large part of the performing arts, you know, so it's not too uncommon."

She smiled, pointing to Bowser and Peach as she looked back to her trailing fans. "Natural talent in the physical department is a great requirement for participation in Flurrie's Finest. Many of our actors are Duplighosts, as recruited by my good friend you have previously met, Dooplis. However, we also look for actors and actresses such as these two citizens who look like the parts they ought to portray. Not everyone can go off natural talent _alone_, dah'lings. That is one of many fields in which I stand…alone."

"Doesn't she mean float?" Bowser muttered out of the corner of his mouth.

Flurrie spun around, her eyes boring into Bowser with eyes only a woman like Flurrie could have, her mouth a hard line. "Oh, so you're _funny_, too?" Her voice was surprisingly light, and it made sense as she turned around to face her fans, her expression just as jovial as her voice. "Aren't they just _charming_? With their costumes…and teddy bears…and _jokes_. Although, perhaps you could help them out to better understand Flurrie's backstage rules…"

"No interruptions," the gaggle of fans chimed, sounding eerily like a school class. Flurrie beamed at them.

"That's right. But perhaps these cute little guests didn't know the rules yet. _Are_ you two planning on joining a backstage tour?"

"We don't _know_ what we're doing yet," Peach answered. "The options are a little confusing and our attendant isn't being much help."

Flurrie floated closer to Bowser and Peach, stealing a glance at the boo. She raised an eyebrow at the diva as if to dare yell at her own employee. "Yes, well…she's rather new on the job. Not quite up on the schedules herself, if you know what I mean."

"I've been working here for five years," the boo corrected. "Longer than you h-"

"-And when you have an eternity of time left, I'm sure that's just a drop in the bucket," Flurrie laughed. "So, you two costumists, have you heard how _wonderful_ our tours are? You get to spend all your time before and even a bit after the performance with moi! Don't you all think this is wonderful bonding time?" She turned back to her fans, her exaggerated bosom bobbing faster than Flurrie floated herself.

"Yes!" The fans all chimed, a few giggling and gripping hands ecstatically.

"Um," Peach added, already feeling quite satisfied with seeing her 'old friend', "we can't get tickets to the backstage tour because it's already started, and the boo said-"

Flurrie flew back over to Bowser and Peach, grabbing their wrists. She was surprisingly strong as she tugged them out of line, the wagon wheeling along with them. "Oh, nonsense. The tour starts when I want it to, and for you two, it starts right now. Free of charge. Because you two look just _spiffy_." She beamed at them, apparently forgiving Bowser for his interruption. The koopa King looked a little too scared to interrupt again, anyway.

"Did I tell you all how I'm such close personal friends with Princess Peach?" Flurrie asked her fans, releasing Bowser and Peach and floating back towards the doors. Hastily, her fans raced to follow her, Bowser and Peach caught up in their midst. Continuing, Flurrie said, "Yes, Mario and I travailed for _months_ searching for Peach. We went to the deepest of seas, the driest of deserts, and even to the far reaches out on the moon to find her…"

"Is that true?" Bowser grunted to Peach as they ran along, keeping up with the 'tour'.

"Yeah…sorta. When Grodus kidnapped me, Flurrie was one of Mario's friends helping save me," Peach whispered in reply. "But Mario said that she didn't actually help that much…"

"Once we finally found her," Flurrie continued, "Peach and I became fast friends-" Bowser looked at Peach with surprise on his face. She smirked and shook her head, denying Flurrie's story. "We spent nearly every weekend together in the Mushroom Kingdom before I settled in Rougeport for my return to the _thee-ay-tur_, my true home." Peach giggled, shaking her head furtively again.

"And of course, Mario…oh ho ho, Mario…" Flurrie held her silence for dramatic effect, spinning around and bending low as if she was keeping this a secret between her and her fans. "I never told Peach the extent of our relationship. If I had, I doubt she would have wanted to be my friend quite as long." Her fat, red lips drew into a long smile as she waited for her audience to react.

Finally, a short koopa near the front pipped, "What _was_ the extent of your relationship, Madame Flurrie?"

Flurrie straightened up, brushing a hand through her dramatic hair. "Let's just say, it's a good thing Mario isn't diabetic." As Flurrie had no hips, she placed her hands up much higher than necessary, evidently to maximize her already unrealistic amount of cleavage. "Because he sure loved getting his _sugah!_"

Bowser coughed to cover a laugh, turning to Peach with a raised eyebrow. With the excited gabber Flurrie's fans were now indulging themselves in, Peach could speak and not be heard at all. "I don't _think_ that's true," she laughed. "Mario was always terrified of Flurrie and her… 'sugar'. But who knows."

"I think you should let Mario have Flurrie. Then I get you all to myself!" Bowser said with a bit of a triumphant roar.

Peach smiled, snaking her fingers between Bowser's. "Trust me, if Mario even considered Flurrie as a love-interest, I wouldn't even want to be on his list. Bad taste, you see."

"In that case, I think we should just leave. Now. I can't even bare to look at her!"

Peach laughed, shaking her head lightly. "It'll be a good show, Bowser. Just don't forget that I'm going to be sitting next to you and I promise you'll make it out alive." She tugged him forward, following the gaggle of fans as they got deeper into the theatre.

Bowser grinned as she pulled, more than eager to catch up. Sitting next to her for a few hours in a darkened theatre sounded _perfect_, no matter what…or who… they were subjected to watching. The question wasn't if he'd make it out alive, but if he'd ever want to leave.

xxxx0o0o0o0o0o0o0xxxx

The worst part about being a kid, Junior decided, was going to school. School was boring, stupid, and a waste of time. Worst of all, Junior had to take his classes by himself. Royal Koopalings hadn't received public education for generations, and Bowser's children were no exceptions. And as the youngest by far, none of Junior's siblings were in his classes…well, Lemmy was in his reading class. And Roy had somehow never passed any of his math classes, so he and Junior had "Understanding Multiplication" together. And Wendy refused to dissect absolutely _anything_, including owl pellets, so she joined Junior for science every once in awhile.

But history…history was _horrible_. One full hour of his smelly, old book and a smellier, older teacher. Mr. Timpermack wheezed when he was speaking and fell asleep whenever he wasn't, leaving his desk with a sizable drool stain. The only reason he still had a job was because he was one of Kamek's first toady friends, and the important magikoopa held his loyalties. At the moment, Junior was doodling in his already 'well loved' textbook while Mr. Timpermack drawled on about something on the board.

"Bowser Junior," he wheezed, adjusting his glasses so thick they seemed to spiral, "Bowser Junior are you paying attention?" He wobbled over, his crooked spinner squeaking slightly with each step. By the time Mr. Timpermack managed to reach the desk, Junior had changed his page and flashed his well practiced good-student-grin.

"Of course I'm paying attention, Mr. Timpermack. The class material is _fascinating_. And may I say, red is definitely your color."

The toady teacher straightened up, his smile revealing his painfully fake teeth. Junior's forced line had been the same exact sentence rehearsed his entire year, and, in fact, passed down from koopaling to koopaling. It seemed the only one who had said it honestly was Ludwig, but the ailing teacher was never the wiser. "Well, that's good, Bowser Junior. Because I didn't think you were, and I was going to give you a pop-quiz. But since you like the unit so much, perhaps we'll just delve a little deeper in. Now, Bowser Junior, can you tell me about the War of the Two Kingdoms?"

"Ummm….isn't that _all_ of the wars?"

"Very astute, Bowser Junior," Mr. Timpermack chuckled. "In a way, yes. But during the ten-year span we are discussing, the War of the Two Kingdoms relates specifically to the war that precedes the first time your parents met for the first time in civilized company."

Junior stared at Mr. Timpermack blankly. He constantly tried to relate history to Junior, insisting that "history reflects and impacts the lives of everyone on our planet, especially royalty". But lately, he'd grown accustomed to relating things to Junior's "parents", which apparently meant Bowser and any female the book mentioned. Unsure of whether Mr. Timpermack was making a joke about Junior's suspicious and mysterious parentage or if he was just senile, he rarely made a comment about it.

"You see," he continued, "the kingdoms are usually assumed to be The Darklands and the Mushroom Kingdom, but it's _actually_ the only war between mere _citizens of _The Darklands and the _Waffle_ Kingdom. Albeit, they were powerful citizens, but citizens nonetheless. Fascinating, yes?"

Junior grunted, opened his notebook, and returned to doodling a rather unflattering caricature of Mr. Timpermack.

"You see, at the time, the Chestnut King was still just a goomba named 'Goomboss' working under your grandfather, the king. He worked with _his_ father, and as part of a mission to spy on other territories, they went to the Waffle Kingdom. Goomboss met the young Princess Éclair and the two fell madly in love. However, not only was Goomboss not a citizen of the Waffle Kingdom, he was also not a king. Goomboss demanded laws to be changed to allow Éclair and himself to wed, but the absurd demand from a visitor went ignored…until Goomboss and the rest of his father's legion waged war on the small county, claiming they were backed by the entire empire. They lost.

"Absolutely no one died. It's called a war, but was really only a war of words. The most interesting thing is what happens in the future…but of course you _know_ what happens in the future."

The silent went on for a few minutes before Junior realized Mr. Timpermack had expected him to answer. Hastily, Junior first checked the clock (37 horrible minutes left) and then his teacher. Unfortunately, Mr. Timpermack hadn't reached his desk yet, so he was still awake and still waiting for an answer. "Um…" Junior sighed, "I dunno."

"Yes, you do!" the toady assured. "We covered the Princess Éclair issue four months ago, Bowser Junior. You got 98% on the test."

"Ohhhh…no wonder I don't remember…" Junior muttered out loud. The better he did on a test, the more likely it was he cheated. Once he realized the inhabitants weren't _really_ waffles, éclairs, and crepes, Junior had completely lost interest and resorted to stealing the test answers and copying them on the back of his handkerchief. "Is it gonna be on the next test?" He could probably find the answers again if he had to.

"Recapping for your benefit," the toady went on, ignoring Junior's question. "Goomboss was still interested in becoming the husband of Princess Éclair years later. He never forgot the laws that forbid their love, and begged King Bowser for a royal position for years. During the Star Road incident, he finally had his wish granted, and attempted to wed his love. However, the Prime Minister prevented their meeting by transforming King Chestnut into a monster of toxic goo. King Chestnut took Princess Éclair to wed anyway, and the Prime Minister told Luigi it was a kidnapping and asked for the goo's destruction. Éclair stopped the brutal murder, the Minister was arrested, and Chestnut and Eclair finally got their wedding. Their happy ending does not affect the history of the Darklands, and so we will now return to the specifics of the War of the Two Kingdoms."

Junior groaned aloud, just barely hearing the teacher's request for him to turn to a page in his book. Instead, he waited for him to sit down at his desk, remove his bottle-cap glasses, wipe them, put them back on, and stare around aimlessly. As he did so, Junior began to count down from 32. On precisely the last second, Mr. Timpermack's head hit the desk and his hood puddled around his face.

A grin spread across Junior's face, fading fast as the familiar _now what_ settled in. Bored, he flipped to the pages on the War of the Two Kingdoms. To his great surprise, Wendy had apparently _loved_ this section. She had written notes in all the margins (dotting her I's with hearts religiously) and even drawn a few pictures, and most surprisingly of all, they seemed to be intelligent text-to-world connections, not just her name sandwiched with "Mrs" and some celebrity's last name.

The image in the book had a beautiful teenage human holding a goomba in her arms. For whatever reason, Wendy had scrawled 'Peach' over the girl and 'Daddy' over the goomba. "What kind of idiot _is_ Wendy?" Junior snarled, reading her other margins best he could.

Junior's eyes snapped to a crude picture Wendy had drawn, illustrating a scene where a stick figure with an "L" hat held a hammer over his head, ready to crush the goop monster. A stick figure with a dress was crying, shouting "But I love him!" next to them. Here, Wendy had drawn an arrow to the hammer-wielding character and written "Mario", labeling the monster and crying girl as Daddy and Peach, respectively.

_Now that's just stupid, _Junior thought. _Why would she label Luigi as Mario?_ He looked through the section, a few names and locations crossed out and relabeled by his sister. Éclair was always Peach. Goomboss, also known as King Chestnut, was always Daddy. Mario was the only written-in name that seemed to take many forms, as Wendy thought was apparently both Minister Crepe and Luigi.

One specific note with Wendy's bubbly handwriting seemed to be written to Roy, who shared the same history class as Wendy. He failed that, too…just not as many times as math. "Stop being an idiot, Roy. Its _obvious_. Éclair isn't allowed to marry the chesthair dude she luvs becuz they have stupid laws. And then some guy turns chesthair into a goop monster, so when he does kidnap Éclair 2 marry her, evrybudy think he's being a creeper and try 2 kill him. But Éclair stops them becuz she luvs him, then he's not a monster anymore. Éclair=Peach. chesthair=daddy"

"u r so stupid thats nothing lik pops and peach u idiot" That horrible handwriting was obviously Roy. It also took Junior almost three minutes just to read.

"Yeah it is," she retorted underneath, the note now curling around the corner.

A pattern of no's and yes's (interjected with a lot of crude language) followed until Wendy added in furious pink pen, "IT'S A METAFOR."

"dude this aint english class" Roy had added. "butt how is that anything lik dad and peach peach dont love pops and pops aint goop"

Junior completely agreed with Roy, at least about the goop thing, but it seemed like at that time the bell had rung, because Wendy's pink pen had started to write something, then left a signature swoop of pulling her pen off the page. Wendy's annotations had covered the entire unit, but nothing explained it to Junior. How was Éclair anything like Mama Peach, if Éclair had loved King Chestnut from the beginning? And no sorcerer had ever made Papa into a pile of toxic goo. There weren't any laws preventing their marriage, there wasn't any jealous Minister in the way. He'd have to talk to Wendy about her stupidity the next time he saw her…or maybe ask Mr. Timpermack.

Freezing in his seat, Junior's entire body went cold. He couldn't do that! He could never ask Mr. Timpermack, and asking Wendy was just as bad as sealing his own death certificate. And ask Roy? Never in a million years. No, no one could ever know Junior was curious…it would make him seem nerdy. Actually being interested in history's relation with his life was as taboo as being nice. The only solution was to forget about it.

Or complain to Wendy that her writing had dyed his pages pink, and convince her to explain at the same time. That might work…

xxxx0o0o0o0o0o0o0xxxx

Night was falling thick and fast as Daisy's jeep bumped up the road, the crenellated roof of the Sarasaland castle just in view over the horizon. "Do you realize this is _actually_ the first time you guys are both staying the night at my place? That silly adventure just went and ruined our plans." She spun around and grinned. To her pleasure, Mario answered back with an honest smile.

"Pretty good adventure, huh?" she continued, facing forward.

"Si," Mario said. "I think the Dark-a-ness may have been a bit-a harder than Bowser is, sometimes." He laughed, beginning a story about when Bowser had kidnapped Peach and brought her to a castle of his in the middle of the jungle. He was allergic to the plants or something, because the only 'attack' Bowser ever tried was sneezing out huge balls of flame. Mario, Luigi, and Daisy all laughed as he detailed their fight, Mario just flipping and hopping to completely embarrass the Koopa King the entire time.

"…and of course-a, once Bowser was-a defeated and gave-a back the key to the-a jungle, Peach was-a sneezing too. I would have-a thought Bowser would-a been more than glad to get-a rid of that jungle. It was-a very…sneezy."

By the time he reached the end of his story, Daisy had pulled into her royal garage and several attendants were rushing out, helping them get out of the jeep. Daisy was chatting to one friendly-looking koopa as she adjusted her skirt, and then a scraggly voice behind her called her name. Daisy's face went white. Slowly, she turned to the side to face the man, taller than her and with sheer disappointment on his face. "Hi…Dad…"

The King of Sarasaland sighed, shaking his head slowly. He itched his chin under his salt-and-pepper beard, still quiet. Finally, he spoke up. "I can understand your outbursts of curiosity. I've grown to accept your characteristics, as unprofessional as many of them are. But Daisy…I was contacted by some of the agents at Tzitzilow yesterday."

Luigi and Mario went silent, looking at Daisy. Of course, Mario didn't know this entire thing had not only been a ruse, but that the king didn't even know Daisy _had_ the gems. But Luigi felt more and more awkward as father and daughter looked into each other's eyes.

"Daisy…how _could_ you? You put not only the lives of your friends, not only the lives of your people and the reputation of our royal name, but the entire universe…no, _two_ universes…at stake! For what? Entertainment? A fun, little collection? You had _no reason_ to have those dangerous gems in the first place, but even LESS reason to remo-"

Daisy squeaked, leaping forward as she covered her father's mouth with her gloves. The king's eyes narrowed in frustration and he went to remove her hands. He held her hands firmly in his tight grip, glaring down at her. "What seems to be the problem, your highness?"

"I don't think we should discuss this in present company, your majesty," Daisy muttered. "Can we continue this conversation somewhere more private?"

"Would you prefer the dungeons, or the torture chamber?"

xxxx0o0o0o0o0o0o0xxxx

Finally, after almost two hours of following Flurrie's curvaceous form around the theatre, listening to her go on about herself, her show, her "friends", and her successes, the actress led the fans to their rows. She stopped Bowser and Peach. "If you don't mind, could we three speak in private?" She smiled and batted her eyelashes, as if it would convince them to choose to go.

"What if we don't want to?" Bowser grumbled, looking eagerly towards the seat Flurrie had personally picked for him.

"Oh, you don't want to, I suppose I wouldn't mind _too_ much," she replied, that same bright voice with the stern expression as when she had reprimanded Bowser before. "But anyway, let's go to my dressing room. You can leave the teddy bears here…unless you'd like to bring one as a token of your appreciation for my courtesy in having our little conversation."

Feeling forced, Bowser and Peach followed the actress with a single black bear. It didn't take long to reach her dressing room, as Flurrie had it situated just next to the seating area. She floated over to a couch and "sat", stretching her arms across the back of it. She smiled wide as Bowser and Peach awkwardly looked for seats for themselves, settling on her creaky-looking armchair and vanity chair, respectively. "So…you've heard plenty about me. Let's hear about you two."

Bowser looked at Peach and grinned. He watched her as she sat up a little straighter in her chair, taking his permission to explain. After all, it _was_ still her turn to define the relationship. She should know their "history" of being secret lovers the best. "Well, we met _years_ ago. He's a very persistent koopa…it seemed like every night he would come to visit me. But we're from practically different worlds; my people don't understand him, his people don't understand me. Those secret visits are all we ever had.

"After awhile, I began to fall in love with him as much as he had fallen in love with me. But our families would have none of it. They forbade him from ever coming to visit me and nearly barricaded me in my own home to prevent me from seeing him. But that couldn't stop us…we would arrange secret meetings, places we could go to see each other unsuspected, ways w-"

"Fascinating," Flurrie interrupted. "Sounds like a real drama…have you considered writing it into a play?"

"Well, I-"

"I don't believe I ever asked your names," Flurrie continued, as if her question had been hypothetical and Peach was the rude one for attempting to answer. "How silly of me."

"Bowser and Peach, of course," Peach replied with a laugh. She instantly realized her mistake when the room drew silent.

"Honey," Bowser seethed, "she means our…_real_…names."

Flurrie raised an eyebrow, her gaze shifting back on Peach's blushing face.

"Oh…right…our _real_ names. I'm sorry, we got all dolled up for this whole 'Bowser and Peach' thing. I get so in-character, and then I had to…tell that story, and so my mind was just so around Bowser and Peach…um, not that our story is anything like theirs; I mean, Bowser and Peach aren't…um…t-together, and they…" Peach swallowed, avoiding the eyes of Flurrie, bright with laughter. She sought out Bowser and he smiled at her, a face that was full of compassion and adoration, even as she embarrassed herself. She took a deep breath and tried to smile back at him.

"I missed your names in all that," Flurrie chuckled.

"Oh," Peach gasped. "Hugo and Rose."

"_Hugo_, really?" she asked, turning to Bowser. "I guess it suits you…"

"You should hear my cousins' names," Bowser bragged.

"No, I don't think we have time," Flurrie replied. She floated back up and went to a mini-fridge on one side with a cocktail bar. She spoke to them as she prepared herself a refreshment, saying, "I was planning on inviting you two to join the Flurrie's Finest in Entertainment and Eats troupe. You both could instantly pull off Bowser and Peach. We haven't had your kind of physical mimicry with a non-Duplighost cast member since…well…ever. And duplighosts are charging an awful lot lately." She sipped her drink thoughtfully, as if contemplating the purposes of their charge spike. "Anyway. I'm not sure you're actually up to the stress of acting…it's much more difficult than talking to me, as intimidating as I am." She tittered at her own comment.

"Are you saying… Rose is a bad actress?" Bowser snarled, starting to look threatening as he dug his claws into the chair and the mane hairs on the base of his neck bristled.

"I'm saying that she might be. If you're interested, I suppose we could arrange an audition. Even if I just have you two be background characters."

"How would _Bowser and Peach_ be background characters?" Peach asked.

"We would make it work," Flurrie replied with a wave of her hand.

"Well, thank you for the offer, but Hugo and I wouldn't be able to arrange that. We don't live locally. And we really never see each other, either."

"Although it would be a _fantastic_ cover for more alone time," Bowser interjected with a salacious growl. He looked at Peach with an expression that showed more lust than he'd dare show under circumstances they weren't playing a part.

Perhaps too in character, Peach's face flushed and she stammered what was most likely a thank you as she tried to collect herself, thrusting the teddy bear at Flurrie and practically tripping out the door. She grabbed Bowser's hand and whisked him out with her, Bowser chortling as they left.

"Enjoy the show, dah'lings," Flurrie airily said while the door shut behind them.

"I don't know what that bumbling blueberry thinks she's talking about," Bowser muttered. "I think you're an _excellent_ actress. Your stutters are particularly convincing."

Peach's blush hadn't quite disappeared and she still couldn't look into Bowser's eyes. She decided their ploy was a bad idea…maybe if she'd decided they would pretend to be old high-school friends, reunited for a perfectly platonic purpose, she wouldn't have to deal with the Return of the Butterflies from last night. "Right. Thanks," she managed to say, focusing her thoughts on the food they would most likely be served at the dinner.

Bowser raised an eyebrow as he looked down at Peach. "Know what I haven't told you in awhile?" Peach didn't answer, so Bowser grabbed her hand. He knew she wasn't going to look at his face, so he didn't bother looking at hers, but his voice was his husky purr that he'd taken to using the previous night. "That I love you."

_Lovely,_ Peach thought. All thoughts of food had vanished as her stomach flipped. "Yeah…you _haven't_ said that for awhile. I was almost immune to it." She gulped and looked up at him. Feeling her gaze, Bowser was thrilled to meet her blue eyes. "But I haven't forgotten."

Bowser chuckled, hugging her close. Peach willingly let herself be wrapped in his strong arms and threw her own around him. "Don't you ever."

The butterflies were worth it, Peach decided. Hugs like Bowser's didn't come from anyone else, and that wasn't considering the scales or spiked accessories. "I won't."

* * *

**Author's Note: **Sorry you had such a lame chapter to deal with for being late. I have some interesting stuff in and planned for 39. And we're getting AWFULLY close to the next (more fast-paced, I hope) part of the story, so that's something to look forward to!

And about the mariowiki bit- According to them, Goomboss's name in almost every language except English is "The Chestnut King". The wiki people have a suspicion they're the same guy and I took it a million levels too far. :D

I should also mention that school isn't giving me a lot of homework, per se, but college applications and scholarship essays and art portfolios and everything else I have to deal with is sapping a LOT of my time I usually write with. I don't want to get back to my every-chapter-late "schedule", so I'll try my best. Hope you're enjoying your September so far!

-Razzi


	39. Goodnight

**Foreword: **School is keeping me much busier than I expected. Not necessarily with homework, just with...I don't even know. I'm just busier. Which isn't good for writing fanfiction (or reading), so bear with me. 40's not done at all, but I'm hoping October will be nice to me since it's my birthday month. ;)

I like this chapter better than last chapter, by the way. It gives the first hint of the mirroring/juxtaposition I intend to do with the relationships CoH is juggling around. :D

Disclaimer stands that I own nothing that Nintendo called dibs on.

* * *

Dinner was over and the younger koopalings were fast approaching their mandated bedtime. This, obviously, meant it was the perfect time for the most elaborate of pranks. Wendy, Iggy, and Roy rounded the corner and ran down the hall, stopping in front of an elaborately decorated wall.

Roy grabbed a nearby tapestry, flipping it to the side and revealing a lever. "Ludo!" He roared, holding up the tapestry. "Getcha tail over here!" On cue, Ludwig spun into the hallway, his spiked shell howling with his ridiculous amount of speed. He popped himself right out of the shell, landing perfectly on his feet. "Show off," Roy laughed.

"Oh, as if you've never utilized your homing capabilities, Roy," Ludwig chortled, ruffling his hair back to his preferred style.

"Das true," Roy agreed, popping his collar with a snicker. "My shell skills kick _tail_ when it comes to getting' my debt-heads."

"Roy," Wendy hissed, "stop blabbering. Ludwig, we, like, need you to enter the codes when Roy flips the lever."

"You're the only one Kamek entrusted the codes with," Iggy seethed, "Even though _I'm_ the one interested in his laboratories."

"Igg-man's got some revenge bubblin', ain'cha?" Roy laughed, elbowing his mohawked brother. "Das how I like my minions."

"_Your_ minions?" Wendy roared. "Like, what gives? This was totally _my_ idea!"

"Wendy," Ludwig barked, "Can we return to the purpose of this congregation?"

"Whatever," she sighed. "We want to screw with Kamek's laboratory."

"Why in the name of our Royal Father would you even _consider_ that hebetude to be in the least bit intelligent?" Ludwig roared.

"You seemed perfectly willing when we told you it was to upset Madame Choorch."

"Yes, because she's a-"

"LUDWIG!" Junior roared from down the hallway, cutting him off before he could exactly describe his contempt. "Ludwig, pull the lever! They're coming!" The youngest of the koopalings raced down the hallway, slipping and sliding on the waxy floors.

"Junior, who da heck is 'they'?" Roy growled, tripping Junior to effectively stop him.

"Kammy and Kamek," he replied, trying to look as if his trip was intentional.

"That don't make no sense!" Roy roared, kicking Junior back on the ground. "They have meetings right now! And dang jobs! I checked their schedules and everything!"

"Haven't you heard, Roy?" Wendy cooed. She giggled, latching on to Iggy's arm. "Kammy and Kamek are, like, working _together_ now. It's _awfully_ romantic. And tonight, I totally heard Kamek wants to, like, get on her gooder side."

"And their cooperation is causing productivity?" Ludwig asked, curiously. "Usually the primordial stages of a relationship leads to dalliance. Are you positive they're _ahead_ of schedule?"

"I saw them coming. Together. In the hall. Towards you guys!" Junior muttered, trying to stand up and getting knocked back down each time. Eventually, he resorted on biting Roy's foot.

"Ew, do you like even know where that's _been_?" Wendy screeched as Junior clamped down. Roy let out a stream of curse words as he tried to kick his youngest brother off.

"I don't care if they're coming," Iggy said, ignoring his siblings and addressing Ludwig. "I just want you to flip the lever, put in the code, so we can mess up his lab. If it ruins his date, even better."

"Do you even have time for such vindictivity?"

"We _will_ if you flip the freaking lever!" Iggy shrieked, now hopping up and down.

Muttering under his breath, Ludwig flipped the lever and revealed a timer with a keypad. He tapped in the code and the hidden door rumbled as if to open. Wendy, Junior, and Roy gave up their fight and turned to watch the door.

When it opened, it revealed one of Kamek's many smaller laboratories; this one specifically geared to the science of sound. "Make sure you don't ruin anything of Ludwig's," Iggy reminded them as he ran in. "Since he's right here and all."

"Very comforting, Iggy," Ludwig sarcastically droled. "I appreciate your fraternal compassion."

Roy was eager to get to destruction and he ran into the laboratory faster than the rest, heading straight for the test-tube drying rack. He picked it over his head and threw it at the ground…but just before the test tubes hit the floor, they stopped and levitated in midair. "What the-"

To their horror, the tapestry and keypad were evidently not Kamek's only security. The test tubes spun around and began pelting themselves at Roy, followed by the rest of the enchanted equipment. Microscopes, graduated cylinders, and even Bunsen burners were suddenly launching themselves at the four would-be vandals.

"RUN AWAAAAY!" Junior bellowed, his arms over his head as he took off towards where they had just entered. Comically, he bumped into a solid and invisible wall, falling onto his shell and sticking in the lab's silicon floor.

Chaos ensued as they attempted to battle back the enchanted lab instruments, Ludwig being the only one they didn't try to destroy. Using his immunity to his advantage, he tried to pry his youngest brother out of the floor. "Isn't this a propitious situation?" he grunted in angry sarcasm. "And Kamek's probably going to be just as antagonized with my presence as he is with all of yours."

Just as Junior came free from the floor, the magic attacks stopped, clattering to the floor. Kamek stepped through the invisible barrier, Kammy on his heels. "Why am I not surprised," he groaned. "What did you children think you were doing?"

"I believe they hoped to disrupt your night of debauchery, Kamek." Ludwig shook his head. "I fear I must admit that I was at their aid and sincerely hope their accomplishment was not met."

Kamek glared at them, then turned to Kammy. "Can you go out there for a second so I can deal with the imps?"

Kammy flashed a wicked smile. "Gladly, Kamek. Do what you feel worst." When she left, the koopalings faces paled. Kamek was already strict…if Kammy was getting under his skin, and if he became even the least bit as sadistic in punishment as she was, there was no safety for them at all.

The old magikoopa waited for Kammy to leave and sighed. He flicked his staff, the room instantly going back to order. "You all deserve a rich amount of punishment. Ludwig, I'm especially disappointed in you for abusing my trust. Roy and Junior, it saddens me that you've moved yourself to such obsessive destruction that you feel it necessary to take down _my_ things when I've done nothing against you. Wendy, I would have thought you would have more sense than to enter a _magikoopa_'s laboratory. And Iggy…I was ready to invite you to have full access to my research. I must seriously reconsider now."

The koopalings shuffled, waiting for their punishment and feeling a bit guilty. Iggy looked on the verge of being sick at his heart-wrenching news.

"Don't do it again." Kamek added, then turned to leave.

"Kamek, aren't you gonna pu-mrphhhshss…" Junior's question was cut off by Roy's smothering claws.

Roy let go, biffed his brother over the head, and finished in his place. "You dun hafta worry about us. We won't do it again, Kam-o."

Kamek raised an eyebrow, a bit of a smile tugging at his lips. "Yeah, I probably should punish you. Kammy most likely expects me to. But, as Ludwig said, I have high hopes for tonight. And if I punish you, I'd have to keep track of you…remember what I made you do…tell your father when he gets home…" Kamek tipped his hat towards the koopalings and left without another word.

Roy, Ludwig, Junior, and Wendy sat in silence in the now pristine laboratory. A soothing voice from the speakers in the ceiling warned them the doors would lock in ten seconds, and they quickly left. "That was…off the hook…" Roy breathed.

"Love will do that to a guy," Wendy giggled, skipping in place. "I'm gonna go get my beauty sleep now. Bubye, boys!"

The boys muttered salutations to Wendy when Junior remembered his question for her about his history book. "Wendy, wait!" Junior yelled, following her. "I had something to talk to you about!" Wendy ignored her brother and continued walking down the hall, her hips swaying from side to side. "Wennnndyyyy!"

As he watched them round the corner, Roy nudged Ludwig. "I betcha dey gots plans for the bet. And what do we got? Squat."

"At least your partner can retain focus on something for more than 45 seconds, Roy," Iggy growled. He pulled out a sheet of paper from his shell and inspected it. "I don't think Morton and I have had any productivity towards getting Mama Peach and King Dad together for days."

"Are we still following through with that nefarious engagement, then?" Ludwig asked, looking at Roy. "Princess Peach is departing in the morn, and we shan't see her again for an undisclosed amount of time. Their aubade is going to be-"

"Ludo, the bet don't end until Kamek says it ends. Derefore, we ain't done yet. We gots some planning to do."

Ludwig sighed, rubbing his temples. "Fair enough, Roy. Let's commence our symposium and get it over with." He and Roy turned to look at Iggy, who just stood and stared back at them.

Roy cleared his throat and Iggy snapped to attention. "You want me to leave, don't you?"

"That would help in defining our privacy, yes," Ludwig muttered.

"Before I snap your neck," Roy added. He grinned maniacally, rubbing his hands together. Within seconds, Iggy was long gone from the hallway.

xxxx0o0o0o0o0o0o0xxxx

Silence dominated over the royal dinner table of Sarasaland. The king sat at its head, his beard tucked into his shirt as he cut his pieces of chicken regally and slowly. Mario was eating more than necessary, feeling like the only solution to the awkward dinner was to have his mouth constantly full. It was delicious, anyway. Luigi could hardly eat at all, cutting his pieces in the most intricate of designs to slow down the process.

Daisy, however, was a wreck. She wasn't looking at her father or her guests and kept dropping her fork on her plate. Her mashed potatoes had long since soaked up all the gravy, and her chicken had been torn to bits by her shaking hands. In all his years of knowing Daisy, Luigi had never seen her so distressed…he'd also never eaten dinner with her father.

After almost an entire half hour of silence, the king cleared his throat and stood up. "I hereby excuse you all from the table at your leisure. I have meetings to attend to. Princess Daisy, I appreciate our meeting earlier and encourage you to keep all my words in mind."

"Of course, sire," Daisy muttered. Mario and Luigi watched the king leave the room, several attendants at his heels. When the door shut, Daisy pushed her food away and covered her face with her hands. "Luigi," she said with a muffled voice, "can we go somewhere?"

"What about Mario?" he asked, putting his hand on her knee lovingly.

"I don't care," Daisy answered. She removed her hands and looked at the older Mario brother apologetically. "Sorry, Mar, but I just need to talk to my guy alone right now."

"Don't-a worry," Mario answered. "I understand. I can just-a go." He left with his plate in his hand, apparently not yet full from his overeating.

Immediately, Daisy's head fell on Luigi's shoulder and she let out a dry sob. "I don't know why I let him get to me like this!"

"Your-a father?" Luigi asked, cautiously putting his other arm around Daisy. She rarely had need for his solace, but he'd do anything to see her smile again.

"I disappoint him with every bit of my life. 'Daisy, be more girly.' 'Daisy, act like a princess.' 'Daisy, why aren't you a doormat?' 'Daisy, why can't you be more like your cousin?' I'm _used_ to it. But today…" she blinked rapidly, afraid to let a single tear leave her eyes. "Today it was like I really broke his heart.

"I get what he was talking about…I really did put more at risk than I should have. He didn't think the 'ends justified the means'. He said I was just as bad as a villain. And that he can't trust me. And that I'm unfit to rule."

"Daisy, you don't-a _want_ to rule. It should not-a matter."

She laughed once, weakly, before replying, "I know. That's another reason I shouldn't care so much…but Dad isn't usually so…disappointed. I feel like I really messed up."

Luigi bent over and pecked his girlfriend on the cheek. "You didn't-a mean to. You had the best intentions I-a could imagine." She smiled in reply. "So your father…are you…grounded?"

She giggled, feeling very comfortable on Luigi's shoulder. Why did she deserve him again? "No, he's just making me attend _all_ my meetings for the next three congressional sessions to learn 'proper respect for the law and the citizens of the universes'."

Luigi stopped stroking her hair and asked, "Does that-a mean you can't go to Grand-a Canal?"

"No, he's letting me do that. He's actually super excited…he thinks that by meeting your parents I'm 'taking major steps towards my future and my chances at matrimony'." She laughed.

Luigi wasn't laughing- his blood seemed to grow cold as Daisy took light her father's opinion. "You..aren't?"

Daisy looked up through her bangs at Luigi's face. "What, taking major steps towards my future and my chances at matrimony? No, I am. I mean, why else would I want to meet your parents? No, I just think it's funny that my Dad's so willing to let go of his unending rage to let me grow up a little."

"Isn't that-a the point of-a parenting? To help-a your children _grow up_?"

"I guess," Daisy agreed with a sigh. "You're gonna be the good parent, aren't you, hun?"

"You can-a be the fun one," he answered.

She laughed and sat up so she could kiss Luigi better. Maybe her dad didn't see it, but she was certainly more grown up than he thought. Daisy already knew exactly how she wanted to spend the rest of her life…this past week of adventuring was just practice.

xxxx0o0o0o0o0o0o0xxxx

"…and after Bowser told me it was the last time, of course he hired me back the very next day," Kammy continued.

Graciously, Kamek laughed. They had indeed finished their duties early, as they had decided to join together and finish them. It was surprisingly easier to complete and suddenly, the magikoopas had all sorts of extra time to spend in the evening. Currently, they were sitting in one of the outside rooms of the VolcanoPalace, watching the lights of the city dance on the smoke. "I believe it," he added. "When Bowser was barely five years old he had me fired. Then, the very next day, he fired his replacement for _not_ being me. It's safe to say he hasn't changed much."

Kammy chuckled. She swirled her wand around her empty glass, refilling it with purple liquid to sip. "I don't know what there is about him that makes him irresistible. He has so many bad traits."

"Irresistible?" Kamek replied, trying not to sound jealous. Kamek and Kammy weren't exactly at 'KamekandKammy' status, but they were making considerable progress. He had brushed her hand and she had left it there for a solid 6.3 seconds already; remarkable progress from the day before where she had purposely burnt his finger for accidently hitting the hem of her robe.

"Every koopa woman I know has, at one point, been _crazy_ about him. And then there's Peach… I still don't know what her deal is."

"Well, she's leaving tomorrow," Kamek added unhelpfully. "I guess we'll be able to figure a lot out from what it's like _without _her. And what she's like without him."

"What do you mean?"

"If it's love," he explained, "they won't last without each other. It'll kill them to be apart after a week like this."

"So…do you think they're in love?" Kammy asked.

"I do," Kamek answered quietly. "I've lived a long time and seen a lot of relationships. And I recognize the way they look at each other, the way she talks about him to me. I recognize it, Kammy…as love."

She could feel his eyes on her, looking for more than her reply. Oh, she knew what he was insinuating, but Kammy wasn't sure how she felt about any of this- a part of her still wished Bowser was hers, but a much larger part of her wanted things to remain just as they were at that moment. Watching the city lights with Kamek on a quiet night was so _easy_ and it felt so right. It seemed _too_ right. Kammy had spent her whole life fighting against other peoples' expectations, and now it was like she was walking right in what was 'supposed' to happen with her love-life.

They continued talking later into the night until Kammy and Kamek agreed they ought to go to bed. Yet, their conversation didn't seem over yet and Kamek desperately didn't want it to be. He proceeded to walk Kammy to her room.

She touched her wand to the door, unlocking it, and stood in the doorframe. Silence. Kammy smirked at Kamek. "What are you thinking right now, geezer?"

Kamek gulped, his Adam's apple dramatically bobbing. "I…I'm thinking about how hideous you must look in your pajamas."

"You'd probably like to see for yourself, wouldn't you, perv?" Kammy's smile went wide as she evilly lowered her eyebrows. "But I'm afraid my beauty would be too much for you to be able to sleep after seeing."

"Hey Haggy McHagson," Kamek interrupted. Kammy rolled her eyes in silent reply. "You know that story of the princess and the frog?"

"What, you wanna see if I kiss you you'll end up handsome prince? Sorry, buck-tooth. It doesn't work unless you're as attractive as a frog."

"That's why I wanted to try it on _you_," Kamek sneered. He was hoping she couldn't hear his heart beating fast…it was probably too forward, but he knew there might not be a better chance.

"I couldn't risk it, fatso," Kammy replied. "In that story, the frog turns into a prince just like the chick's a princess. Turning into whatever ugly crap you are…not on my to-do list." She smirked at him, clutching the doorframe.

"As you wish," Kamek chuckled, rolling his eyes. "Goodnight, Princess Frog-face." He took the door handle and shut it, leaving Kammy in her room.

She stared at the wood, a smile still on her face. She replayed this final bit of their conversation in her head, suddenly deciding she ought to have the last word. If she threw the door open, grabbed his face and kissed him, there would be _no_ question that she was in charge of the relationship. That sounded perfect!

But when Kammy dramatically threw the door open as planned, there was nothing but the settling blue dust of Kamek's poof away.

xxxx0o0o0o0o0o0o0xxxx

Music blared from the pit in front of the stage and all of Flurrie's Finest rushed out to receive their applause. Peach pleasantly clapped for each of the actors in turn, and noticing one whom she had particularly enjoyed, turned to see Bowser's reaction. All she saw was his head slumped on his chest as he slept.

She rolled her eyes and laughed a bit, only slightly surprised he had managed to sleep through the entire end of the show. She elbowed him fiercely, and he immediately woke up, roaring about mustard and fish cakes. Peach laughed again, waiting as he slowly realized what had happened and began clapping with the rest of the audience.

As the actors that came out to center stage raised in importance, Peach stood up. "What are you doing?" Bowser hissed from his seat. "Why are you standing? Are we leaving?"

"No, silly!" she answered back, loud enough for him to hear over the jolly finale music. "I'm giving them a standing ovation."

"Why? They weren't _that_ good," he asked, continuing his golf clap.

"For the same reason you're still clapping; it's _polite_," she replied. "Besides. I thought the male lead was…very good."

"You just liked him in his tight little man pants!" Bowser accused with indignation.

Peach laughed, but didn't answer Bowser. In truth, he was quite attractive for a human; but she didn't have much experience with human men besides the Mario brothers. Most likely, Bowser was just jealous because he _wasn't_ a human. Besides, Flurrie had come out so she needed to direct her attention to applauding her as she bowed…and bowed…and bowed.

Finally, the curtain closed on the supporting cast, leaving Flurrie with arms outstretched as the applause died. She floated over to the microphone in the center of the stage. "Thank you for your kind and loving attention. Your taste in entertainment is truly unmatched…and now if those with back-stage passes would congregate outside my dressing room, I've got some more great things to tell you all about!"

Peach sighed, feeling quite comfortable in her seat and not at all wanting to go over to where Flurrie was. "Bowser, I'm kind of tired," she said.

"You should have napped during the show like I did," he responded with a grin. "It was more entertaining than watching that purple fart-cloud float around and pretend to sing."

Peach rolled her eyes. "She's actually fairly talented, Bowser. But really…I just wanna go home. Is that okay with you?"

Bowser didn't answer. He felt cold as he heard Peach's words. She was already going home tomorrow, and that was bad enough. Was she homesick? Or just sick of him? His mind was still going when she interrupted, "We can catch a subway or get a clown-car taxi or something, right?" It dawned on Bowser that by 'home', she really meant his Palace. Even if it was just a fluke and slip of the tongue, that realization made him more than happy to take her 'home'.

He put his arm around her and squeezed, agreeing, "yeah, let's just go home."

They did their best to sneak out of the auditorium, snaking through chairs and trying their best to blend in with the audience members who _weren't_ in the backstage pass group, pretending to be a lot more delinquent than most likely necessary.

Once out of the auditorium, they were able to see the full effect of the nighttime Downtown Darklands. Everything was lit and just as bright as it was mid-day, but with the eerie skies of night and the lively and excited crowd replacing the families and workers they'd seen on the streets during the day. Bowser took Peach to a closed-down building he apparently owned, as he was able to unlock it with his own set of passwords. "Don't worry, we're just going to the roof for the Clowncopter," he promised, noticing she looked a bit distant.

"I'm not scared, Bowser," Peach replied with a bit of a smile. "I'm just…thinking."

The building was dark, but Bowser took Peach's hand and knew just where to go. He kept a low flame burning out of his open mouth; he couldn't talk, but the lighting worked excellently. They walked in silence to the roof, Peach apparently too absorbed in her own thoughts to engage in a one-sided conversation.

They reached the roof and Bowser flipped a switch. He swallowed his flame as the lights went on, illuminating the roof and the circled "H" symbol they were just a few feet away from. "What are you thinking about?" He asked, curiously.

Peach didn't answer right away. She pulled her hand out of Bowser's so that she could hold her arms, looking very shy and bashful with whatever her thinking was. "Just thinking about…tomorrow."

"Oh," Bowser answered. They stood in silence, Bowser sheepishly running his hand up his own arm. The two minutes or less that it took the clown copter to arrive felt much longer than that, as both royals had a longer, more awkward silence than they'd had to deal with for practically the whole week.

Apparently the clown copter had been on autopilot, because no one was inside. Bowser climbed in, tilting it down with his weight. He lifted Peach and helped her in, setting her down lovingly with a bit of a laugh. "I think this is the first time I've helped you into one of these without a word of complaint."

Peach took hold of the edge of the copter. "That's not the only thing that's a first this week," she replied with a smile.

Bowser took a hold of the controls and lifted them off the roof. Peach watched the city below them, lights dancing and blurring as they flew. "It's a lot better view when you're not frantic and scared for your life."

"You won't be scared for your life the next time I come pick you up, right?" Bowser asked, staring ahead at the skies, but smiling all the same.

Peach laughed, "I don't think I have a reason to, really." She thought for a moment before adding quietly, "Everything's changed, hasn't it?"

"What do you mean?"

"We…like each other. That's not the same."

"I've always liked you, Princess," Bowser replied with amusement.

"Well, yeah, but you admitted you _loved_ me. Kidnapping-"

"If you ever came willingly, it wouldn't be kidnapping," Bowser reminded her. "Maybe sometime you could come…for a visit. Me and the kids- _especially_ me- we'd love that. No coup d'etat necessary every time. Though, if you WANT to hand over the Mushroom Kingdom, just say the word."

Peach laughed, shaking her head. Then she sighed. "Right now, I'm not sure I want anything to do with the Mushroom Kingdom."

"What do you mean?" Bowser asked, glancing back at Peach in shock before quickly looking back to the skies. They were almost at the open Volcanopalace hangar. "You love the Mushroom Kingdom! It's like your baby!"

Peach giggled at the imagery. "I know; I don't mean I want to…get rid of it or anything. I just…I'm not sure I want to go back yet."

Bowser was quiet for a bit, mulling over what she could possibly mean. "Technically," he mumbled, "you're not going back to the Mushroom Kingdom until the end of _next_ week."

"That's right," Peach agreed with a slight groan.

"What's that tone for?" Bowser asked. "Aren't you going on an exotic vacation with all your favorite people?"

She replied only with silence. When Peach really got to thinking about it, she wasn't sure who was included in that list of her favorite people anymore. They were quiet for the short bit of time left in the flight, and Bowser helped Peach out of the copter with a weak smile.

"I don't want you to go back, either," he said quietly. "You have no idea how much I'll miss you."

Peach bit her lip, trying desperately not to get overly emotional. After all, this wasn't a planned vacation with a friend- it was practically a kidnapping! She held onto Bowser and he hugged her close. "I'm so tired, Bowser," she explained. "Tired for so many reasons. Tired of being lied to, tired of feeling forced into a cookie-cutter life, tired of being the damsel in distress saved by her knight, tired of being disappointed, tired of disappointing. But most of all, I'm just plain _tired_. I need my sleep."

"I'll walk you to your room, Princess," he muttered into her hair. Bowser didn't have any idea how to handle Peach's sudden confession…it was most likely just brought on from exhaustion anyway.

"I don't want to do that, either."

"Peach, you can't stay awake all night complaining about how tired you are," he replied with amusement.

"But going to sleep means I'm that much closer to tomorrow. I don't want to leave here…I feel _appreciated_. No one's lying to me about their problems, their joys, or their emotions. This week I've been allowed to be just who I want to be for the reasons I have. Nobody's pressuring me…well, not _really_. But anyway, I just don't want to close my eyes and when I open them, I know that'll all be that much closer to gone.

"But most of all, I don't want to sleep because that's just more time…more time away…from you. I feel like I _need_ you. I don't know how I'll go a week without hearing you tell me how much you feel, and I don't want to start that…emptiness any earlier than I have to."

Bowser groaned. He had never hoped Peach would feel the wrenching pits of love that he had to deal with. "Trust me, I know _exactly_ how you feel." He pulled her closer, running a claw through her hair. "But you still have to go to sleep. I'll walk you to your room."

They took hands and left the hangar, engaging in the smallest of small talk as Peach felt rather like she was walking to her funeral. Although it took much longer than usual, the walk was over all too soon.

Peach opened her door slowly, Bowser watching her in awkward silence. The way she was fiddling with the handle reminded him of the way Wendy would try and hint to the guys who dropped her off from evenings out that they wanted a goodnight kiss, but he didn't have the guts to impose anything like that on Peach. Besides, it wouldn't help either of them that much. She wasn't stalling for a kiss…she just wanted to be with Bowser a little longer. And he was certainly okay with her wanting that.

Opening the door, Peach was still moving as slow as she could. She looked into Bowser's eyes, searching for something, _anything_, that she could latch onto to feel more like he was there for her through the night. Unless… "Bowser," she queried, "Do you think you could…stay with me tonight?"

"As in stay in your room? To sleep there?" Bowser asked, his voice almost squeaking. Peach nodded in reply, a smile tugging at her cheeks. He didn't bother hiding his enthusiasm. "I think that would be amazing!"

Peach smiled, grabbing her door. "Well, I have to get ready for bed then."

"Okay," Bowser replied, a goofy grin on his face, standing still in Peach's doorway.

"Which means I need _you_ to give me some privacy. And get ready yourself."

"Oh. OH. Okay." Bowser stumbled away, often looking over his shoulder at Peach's closing door. She watched him leave, his tail flipping every which-way. When she closed the door and faced her room, getting ready for bed as fast as she could seemed like the most exciting thing she could possibly do.

xxxx0o0o0o0o0o0o0xxxx

By the time Luigi got back to his shared guest room, Mario was already in his pajamas. "What was-a wrong with Daisy?" he asked, looking up from the television.

Luigi shook his head. "Her father said-a some…harsh things. She felt inadequate."

"What did-a she do?" Mario asked.

Luigi rarely kept anything from his older brother, but he didn't think telling Mario what he and Daisy had conspired would do him any good to know. There was enough drama between Daisy and her father as it was…no need to upset Mario _before_ they left to visit their parents. So instead he just shook his head.

Mario took the quiet easily and kept looking at the television. "Was he talking about-a the gems?"

"Well…yes…and other things-a, too."

"Good thing we were-a here, wasn't it? To save-a the universe."

"Yeah," Luigi replied, scratching the back of his neck. "Things like-a this tend to happen when-a we're around."

"Almost like it was-a planned," Mario added with a smirk.

Luigi felt caught and he was sure if Mario _hadn't_ suspected, his sudden paling would give them away. "Heh…yeah…al-a-most. But, of-a course, it wasn't."

"Mama Mia, wouldn't that-a be fun though?" Mario rolled onto his back and grinned. "Everywhere-a you go is an adventure. One day there is a princess to-a save, one day it's the fate of-a the universe. Never a dull-a day."

"We'd never get any plumbing done, brah," Luigi reminded him with a smile. Maybe he didn't suspect.

"I would not-a mind if the only kind of-a pipe we saw was a warp-pipe."

"So…you wouldn't mind if you had-a _fake_ adventures all just-a planned?"

"Not at all. Why?"

Luigi opened his mouth, then considered Daisy's tears. Even if Mario was over the moon that Luigi and Daisy had risked the entire universe for his entertainment, he didn't want to risk one iota of Daisy's trust. She could tell him herself…eventually.

* * *

**Author's Note: **Oh gosh. I have this fear I'm going to upload the wrong chapter one day and I almost did. Y'all were THISCLOSE to getting what little I have written for 40 instead of 39. Heh. That would be confusing.

And as a proper author's note, I feel I should tell you that yes, Bowser and Peach are going to sleep in the same bedroom. But besides some fluff, there's nothing going on that Peach wouldn't approve of. I normally wouldn't tell you that kind of thing upfront, but in novels and such you get to read the next chapter right away, so there's no room for speculation. In our case, you have a month to wonder WHAT they're going to do, and I don't want y'all to get freaked out or get your hopes up TOO much. A little is acceptable. C:

Also, I appreciate all the comments I've been getting lately. Very well-thought out and appreciative! I wish I had time to GIVE comments like these, but I don't. It just reminds me even more how wonderful you guys are for reading this monster of a story and keeping me motivated to finish. So thanks, guys. :)

-Razzi


	40. To Sleep, perchance to Dream

**Foreword:** This month was kind of hard to get going, and I was GOING to update a few days ago, but my internet went out and other issues led me to not updating until today. But it's "No school November" which tends to mean "Razzi gets to have no life on days off and thusly gets time to write". So I'm hoping I'll have a nice holiday season gift of on-time chapters as we lead into a new part of the story.

Just a few things about Chapter 40 here- It was fun to write because it feels a lot like my way early chapters, in the fact that I only (in reality) have two PoV's going on. And the main thing I wanted to tell you is that, with a few exceptions in random sentances or paragraphs, the last bit in today's chapter is _over two years old_. So that would be why it REALLY feels like an early chapter. I'm going to write about why I put this bit in that I've had sitting around in my LJ since, honestly, I don't need longer AN's. So if you're curious, you can pop over there (link's in the profile).

And I own _nothing_. Not even the pink pajama Peach pleasantly picks.

* * *

Peach's door shut, and she was still grinning. This was a _fantastic _idea…she didn't want to spend a single moment without her new best friend before she had to, even if those moments were spent asleep. But now the prospect of sleeping in the same bed with Bowser came up, she was terrified. What was she supposed to wear? How was she supposed to act?

Peach raced over to her vanity to begin preparing for the night before realizing she hadn't Peach never intended on sleeping in the same bed with Mario when she packed. But she _did_ prepare herself for looking cute in the morning with her friends, so she had plenty of cute pajamas perfect for sitting at a breakfast table…but what was right for this kind of ordeal?

She held up a pomegranate nightgown, slit down the front generously and up the side to her mid-thigh. She shook it out, staring at it with possibility, before throwing it back in disgust. That was _not_ what she wanted for tonight…

A few more nightgowns went through her hands. Why didn't she just bring pajama _pants_ with her? Then she found some, crumpled at the bottom of the drawer. Pink drawstring pajama pants with little hearts, brought in case there was a chilly night and for no other real reason. But if she was sharing sheets with someone, particularly someone as fond of her as Bowser, she didn't want to deal with bare legs. A smile spread across her face, the pajama pants reminding her of sleepovers with Daisy and late-night movie parties with the little girls from Mushroom Town. This seemed perfect.

Now that she'd found that, finding a white tank-top to go with it was a snap. She ran over to her bathroom, pajamas thrown over her shoulder. Peach kicked off her shoes and earrings, and then frantically undressed, moving faster than she had been getting ready for bed all week. She traded her layers of crinoline and underskirt for the light and roomy pants, slipping into a comfortable but rather foreign-feeling sports bra and the soft, white tank-top.

Peach shook out her hair, brushing it down and washing off her make-up. As much as she wanted to look absolutely perfect for Bowser (he _was_ doing her a favor and all…), years and years of lectures on wearing nothing but a clean, washed face to bed kicked her desire out the window. She fervently brushed her teeth until foam was spilling out her mouth, and every few seconds her eye would dart to the door.

Finally, as Peach was nervously dabbing her face with age-resisting cream, she heard a knock at the door. She turned to look so quickly she smeared a line of white cream across her nose. Quickly, she rubbed it off and sang, "coming!"

Sacrilegiously kicking her dress into her bathroom in a puddle of expensive pink satin, she shut the bathroom door and stumbled to the one Bowser was standing behind. Peach took a deep breath that she wasn't sure she should have needed and threw it open.

Bowser stood there, shelless and wearing his own pair of pajama pants. He shuffled awkwardly in the doorway, whispering harshly, "can I come in? Before anyone sees?"

Peach had been staring at Bowser. She forgot he slept without his shell, but the memory of Bowser's birthday breakfast was all coming back to her now. She remained standing in the doorway, her eyes seemingly locked on Bowser's chest as she thought about the ten royalties, all piled on Bowser's ridiculously uncomfortable bed.

"Peeeeaaaach?" Bowser whispered, a bit harsher. He shifted his reasonable weight from one foot to the other, looking down the hallways. "I don't think you want people to see me, either,"

She finally snapped out of her mild trance and looked up at Bowser's pleading face. "Oh, of course! Come in!"

Moving to the side, Peach allowed Bowser plenty of room to rush in. His tail whipped as he ran into the room, showing off his defined yellow back. It probably took quite a few muscles to lug around such a heavy-laden shell, though even without it, Bowser still walked in a slump.

She shut the door and Bowser quietly moved to a wall, unsure of what to do. He'd imagined this scenario many times before. Peach let him in, they stared each other down, said a few pleasantries, and she shut the door. Then, she would rush at him and…well, the longer the koopa king let himself daydream, the better he knew every nook and cranny of this bedroom. As well as the more breakable pieces of furniture.

But this wasn't Bowser's daydream. This was reality. So while Peach's shutting of the door, sheepish smile, and muttering of feeling unsure of what to do wasn't nearly as _exciting_, it was perhaps better. "Maybe this wasn't a good idea," she muttered.

Bowser's eyes went wide. "No! Why wouldn't it be?"

"Well," Peach replied, walking over to sit on the edge of her bed, "I don't know…what to do. You always have a plan for what to do."

Bowser walked over to join her. "Peach," he started, as he reached the bed. But if he knew anything about Peach it was that she wanted respect…and he wasn't certain he was even allowed to _touch_ her bed while she was on it. In a quick, questioning tone he asked, "can I sit down on your bed?"

"Oh, of course," Peach replied all in a flurry. With a gracious smile, Bowser sat next to her. The bed hardly creaked; it appeared more than willing to accept both their weight. "It's a lot softer than your bed," she said unnecessarily. "And it's big."

"I know, Peach," Bowser replied with a half-smile. "I helped pick it out. Mostly with you in mind."

Peach blushed. "It looks just like a normal Bowseresque guest room to me," she whispered.

"It is," he agreed. "You don't usually come to…_visit_…here. If you'd like, we can replace the décor to suit your style more. But the closet, the bathroom, the vanity, and…the bed, were all designed with you in mind." Bowser smiled. "Because I love you."

Peach laughed, resting on her hands behind her. "I know you do." She smiled back at him. "But I still don't know what we're supposed to do now."

"_Well_," Bowser sang, looking out of the upper-corner of his eye to appear innocent. "A few obvious things come to mind."

"Like wha-aaah! Bowser!" Peach tried to stop herself from laughing as she angrily smacked him with a pillow. Bowser laughed, shielding himself with a bare arm.

"We can elope first if it makes you feel better!" He added after grabbing the pillow. His eyes twinkled with delight.

Peach continued laughing. "Is this how you treat _all_ the ladies who invite you to stay with them overnight?" she asked, pretty sure the answer would honestly be yes. Besides herself, what kind of person would ask their just-a-friend to stay with them overnight?

"Considering you're the only one who ever has, yes."

Peach stopped her onslaught for a moment, blinking in surprise. "Really?"

Bowser chuckled, staring down at his beloved. "What, did you expect me to be some kind of womanizer, using a new groupie every night to try and get over you?"

"Well…a little," Peach replied.

Bowser imagined himself as thus and laughed. "Naw. I probably _could_ be like that. I'm sure sexy enough and have enough ladies crawling to get under my shell. But when you're in love with someone as much as I am, it kind of loses its appeal." He grinned, tipping her chin affectionately. "Good thing you're flipping gorgeous or I'd think I was insane."

"Aww, Bowser. I'm not-"

"Gorgeous? Shy-guy crap, Peach. You're the most beautiful creature in our entire bizarre world. Especially right now; you just look happy and…simple." He put a claw through her brushed-out hair, then fixed her almost-falling tank-top strap. "This is the face I want to fall asleep to." He turned his smiling face back to hers, looking rather smug. "But you _knew_ that, didn't you? You're just fishing for compliments!"

Peach shrugged. "Mmmyeaaah," she admitted. Immediately, she was laughing uncontrollably as Bowser started smacking her with the pillow. It didn't hurt, but it was enough that Peach decided to fight back.

The pillow-fight escaladed as they walked over the bed, knocked into lamps, and fell over each other, wrassling to secure as many pillows as they could. By the time they stopped fighting, over a half hour later, breathless on their backs on the floor, the room looked suspiciously like it did at the end of Bowser's daydreams.

He rolled over and grinned at her. "See, Peach? You don't _need_ plans. That's what's so great about being with the one you love."

"You're ridiculous," she answered, chucking her pillow at his face. But the truth of his statement just resonated inside her; her heart was swollen to the size of a beach ball and he looked _much_ too defined to be fair. Maybe if she'd picked the pomegranate nightgown, she'd have won the pillow-fight by sheer distraction. "Hey Bowser," she said, her breath almost completely caught.

"Yeah?"

"Thanks for coming. I…I'm gonna miss you."

Bowser smiled at her, stretching his claw out to take her hand. "Anytime, Peach. Really. Best favor in the world. But out of curiousity…are we going to sleep on the floor?"

Peach laughed and, still holding Bowser's hand, stood up. "No, of course not! The bed's big enough for two of us. The point is that I don't want to be alone tonight…as long as you don't _try_ anything on me." She raised an eyebrow at him as Bowser bit his lip. "Are you gonna be able to manage that, big guy?"

"You sure you don't wanna just elope? Then it won't _matter!_" Bowser replied.

Peach laughed and nodded, pulling him over to his side of the very large bed, intending on leaving enough room between them for an entire extra princess. "I'm certain. I'm also tired, so…" she crawled in under the covers on her side, pulling the red satin up to her chin.

Slowly, Bowser climbed in. It felt so _strange_; not only because he was getting in the same bed as Princess freaking Peach, but because the bed was actually _comfortable_. "I should get a less-manly bed," he muttered to himself. "This is really awesome." He stretched out (there was plenty of room), and let his mane lay comfortably on one of the few remaining pillows from their war.

Peach smiled, rolling onto her side facing Bowser. She lifted a hand to hit the light-switch, the light from the polluted city and volcanic tips giving the room a hazy sort of half-light. Bowser looked particularly happy in this lighting, his smile carved into his face with sheer honesty and joy. He seemed comfortable without his shell and in the soft bed, and completely in love. That was the face _she_ wanted to fall asleep to.

And she did. Peach fell asleep within the next few minutes, seeing Bowser understood she was tired and refrained from speaking. He instead watched her breathe in complete peace. Maybe she was dreaming. Maybe even about him!

Bowser didn't realize he had inched any closer to her, but soon he was brushing his arm against her. He paused, feeling like he should pull away but desperately not wanting to. Solving his problem, Peach stirred just enough to grab hold of his arm and pull it closer. She smushed her face into it, driving Bowser absolutely crazy…he could feel her smile as she held onto his arm like a scaly teddy bear.

Lovingly, he took his other arm and wrapped it around her, embracing Peach's sleeping form. She reciprocated, curving into him. Bowser could no longer see her face as she slept, but he could feel her breathing and he could feel her form against his. That was better, anyway. Irreplaceable.

He squeezed his eyes shut as he tried to forget that this would possibly be the last time he could be this close to Peach. Tried to forget that in just a few hours, she would be boarding the plane to bring her back to her normal life. Forgetting was easier than expected…and soon Bowser was fast asleep.

He slept better than he ever had before.

xxxx0o0o0o0o0o0o0xxxx

When Larry wanted to read under a blanket, he took it seriously. A lovely nook next to his bed, crudely carved by patient koopaling claws, held his lantern and a sizable amount of midnight snacks, as well as extra room to store the giant comforter he now had thrown over his four-post bed. The quilted plush blanked used to cover his parents' bed, but once his father was left a widower, he deemed the frivolous blanket unnecessary. He preferred sleeping on rock-hard beds with steel-wool sheets, Bowser had declared.

The best thing about the comforter as a ceiling was that it was not only thick enough to prevent his lantern light from escaping into the room, but that, even after all these years, he could still faintly smell his mother. Somewhere among all the scents of mold, stone walls, and Cheezy-Gooms, there was the unmistakable odor of lilacs, charcoal, and something he couldn't quite pin.

Larry had never actually smelt his mother, per-se, but once she died, the gaurds needed to provide his egg with a method of warmth and protection that could connect him to familiarity through scents; the same way a mother would have warmed him. They settled on the old comforter. It didn't take him long as a young koopaling to find the blanket and steal it for himself.

But tonight, he wasn't thinking about his mother, even if the charcoal was especially pungent. Larry had read the very same paragraph about twelve times in a row, but the adventures of a mild-mannered reporter and his secret identity just didn't catch his attention that night. He was completely preoccupied with thoughts about his Mama Peach and the fact that she very well may be leaving that next morning.

He groaned, realizing how pitifully slow he was going with his reading, and shut the book. Larry stood up on his bed, grabbing the lantern on his way out to put the book away. He pushed the blanket aside and hopped down, swinging the lantern as he went. Once Larry straightened up, he was just inches away from a partially lit face of horror; its mouth was open in a manic grin with fangs glinting, eyes looking in completely different directions. Larry screamed something akin to Wendy's shrieks, tumbling backwards and knocking his head on his bed. The lantern clattered to the floor, extinguishing itself almost immediately.

Though now in a completely dark room, this invader had the unmistakable voice of Lemmy as he asked, "Why'd you turn off the lights?"

"Lemmy, you nit-wit!" Larry seethed. He felt for the lantern, carefully opening the door and blowing a flame just large enough to hit the wick and start up the light again. "Why'd you come in here like that? Did you _want_ to give me a heart-attack? Or are you just a fan of watching your siblings sleep now?"

"I dunno," he slurred, shielding his eyes from the accusatory light of Larry's lantern. "I just wanted to ask you if Mama Peach is really going home tomorrow. I think Morton made it up to scare me."

"He most certainly did _not_," Larry replied, still a bit sharp in his voice. He put the book back on the shelf it belonged and walked over to his brother and his fort-bed. "She has to go home tomorrow; that way no one suspects we kidnapped her."

"Oh, okay," he muttered. "When's she coming back?"

Larry bit his lip, not daring to face his brother. "I don't know. Probably not until King Dad picks her up for another visit…but he doesn't usually take her here."

"Why not?"

"Because, Lem," Larry tried to reply, but he couldn't find the words. "I don't know why."

"But doesn't Mama Peach like us? And King Dad?"

"Yeah, probably. It _seems_ like she does…but that doesn't mean she can come to the palace."

"Why not?"

Larry shook his head, a little saddened that this seemed to be all the world would let him think about tonight. "I don't know if they _can_ be together. I think Mama Peach and Dad like each other a whole lot, but she has _responsibilities_. Kinda like superheroes. You know Superkoopa?" Lemmy grinned. He certainly _did_ know Superkoopa! Nodding at Lemmy's glee, Larry continued, "Know how Superkoopa and Koopis Lane never get together 'cause he doesn't want her hurt, even though they really like each other? I think it's like that. Mama Peach and King Dad live in too different of worlds to actually work as a together."

Lemmy shook his head. "No, Larry, das wrong. Koopis Lane and Superkoopa _do_ get together. They got married a few years ago, and she's not dead yet!"

Larry sighed, nodding. "But it took them nearly sixty years and twelve different continuaincies to get around to it for real. I don't think Mama Peach and King Dad have that kind of time, Lemmy…"

"Then it's a good thing we're helping them out, huh?" Lemmy shouted back, happily ignoring his unnecessary rise in volume.

Larry opened his mouth, ready to sneer, _you just don't get anything!_, but Lemmy looked too dang excited to disappoint. "I guess that's true," he tried. "They've never had a flock of cupids on their side like this. Maybe something will be different after all."

Lemmy grinned, shifting his weight from one foot to the other. "Good. I like Mama Peach. I want her to stay forever."

"Me too," Larry replied. There was silence for almost a minute when Lemmy muttered that he forgot why he'd come in. Larry laughed. "You wanted to know if Morton was lying about Mama Peach leaving."

"Oh! Yeah! And he _wasn't_ lying…just wrong." Lemmy replied triumphantly.

Considering his brother's surprisingly deep reply, Larry nodded. "You know…that sounds exactly right, Lemmy."

He grinned. "'kay, well, bye then," Lemmy muttered. Awkwardly, he ran out of the room, leaving Larry alone again to chuckle.

He looked down to the floor and saw his book sitting patiently on the floor. Larry grinned and picked it back up. Sometimes he needed to be a lot more like Lemmy…less worrying, more optimism.

He carried his book back to his bed-fort and flipped to that paragraph he never quite finished. With amusement, he read that last line in its full effect- _"Even after so many years, Koopis's smirk still made him feel weak in a way that had nothing to do with kryptoshrooms. She was worth all the trouble that his secret identity gave him, even with the Toyman bearing down on them."_

Larry decided that Peach and Bowser had nothing to worry about. They were as meant to be as Superkoopa and Koopis, even if it took them just as long.

xxxx0o0o0o0o0o0o0xxxx

Volcanopalace began its morning ritual of grinding up the inside of the volcano's rocks. Cooling lava began sizzling hot, gears clanged, rocks smashed, and all other kinds of commotion began the day. It was 8:30 on the spot, and Bowser's eyes opened…mostly out of habit. The bed was so soft, he felt inclined to stay in there all morning.

Especially when his eyes were opened wide enough for him to see the still-sleeping figure in his arms. There was _no way_ he wanted to leave this heaven and its finest angel.

Instead he closed his eyes again and nuzzled his face into Peach's disarrayed hair. "Good morning, love," he muttered, hoping not to wake her.

He stayed like that, too comfortable and elated to move, but too well-adjusted to his schedule to fall back asleep. Soon enough, Peach stirred herself, and Bowser reflexively loosened his grip.

She yawned wide, stretching her arms until she accidently hit Bowser in the face. Peach desperately tried to swallow her yawn as fast as she could to apologize, feeling rather awkward and embarrassed. Like Bowser, she'd completely forgotten the company she had requested for the night…though it did explain why she'd slept so much warmer and easier.

Bowser laughed, holding Peach's hand to assure her he was perfectly fine. "Having your hand whack me in the face first thing in the morning is possibly the best thing in the world, Peach," he reassured. She laughed, easing her way a little farther from Bowser to see him better, putting her arms at a comfortable position beneath her head. The bed quickly readjusted itself as to not leave a canyon in the mattress's middle "Did you sleep well?"

With a pleasant sigh, she answered, "Very. I think you helped… I probably would have been too listless to sleep otherwise."

"Yeah," Bowser agreed with a toothy grin. "I wouldn't have fallen asleep at all last night if I couldn't hear you beside me. It was basically awesome."

"Oh," Peach quietly interrupted, "I think I should tell you. I woke up in the middle of the night and we were…embracing. And I know it would have been more polite and proper to scoot away when I realized that, but it was really warm and I was really tired, and," Peach started to blush, "you're…surprisingly soft. I didn't wanna move."

Bower nodded at her. "You can cuddle in my arms whenever you want, Peach. Just don't go around telling people how soft I am."

She laughed, "Don't worry, I won't. It can be one of our little secrets."

They were quiet for a bit, just enjoying each other's company on the soft bed. "You do realize I can tell people that I slept with Princess Peach now, don't you?" Bowser asked with a grin. His head was propped against his arm so he was almost sitting up, but still eye-to-eye with Peach.

Peach's sweet smile disappeared as her eyes grew cold. "You do realize that if you do, I'll make sure I never see you again…and when I do have to, you won't be happy that I know your soft-spots." Her cold eyes twinkled just a bit as she tried to hide her inner laughter.

"Aw, can't I tell my kids at all?"

Peach looked to the side and bit her tongue as she teasingly considered. "Not in that wording."

Bowser gave her a toothy grin. "Alright, how about…" he sat and thought, his grin fading with the silence before coming back. "Nope, no matter how I say it, it sounds dirty."

"Well, it wasn't,"

"I know, real pity! What was the point?" Bowser complained. In response Peach gave him a quick little smack to the arm. "Just kidding, Peach. I still love you."

With a bit of a giggle, Peach added, "I should hope so!"

Bowser raised an eyebrow. "Why do you say that?"

Peach was taken a bit aback, but didn't show it as she shook her head slightly. "I guess I think it would just ruin the point of love…if all you…or anyone…was interested in was the….err…more physical part."

Bowser gave a bit of a wicked grin before softening. "Naw, there's a lot more to my love for you than that." He adjusted his posture a bit, reminding Peach of a little kid excited to tell a story. "I've had this speech planned for _years_, Peachy."

"What speech?" She laughed.

"About why I love you, of course!" He replied with a barking laugh. Triumphantly, he began, "I love the way you play with my kids like your own…the way you play with _any_ kid like your own. I love the way you smile when I talk to you and the way your eyes twinkle when you laugh. I love the way you let everyone know what you're thinking, the way you can swing a frying pan at someone's head and then make a chocolate-chip pancake in it later."

As Bowser continued, Peach began to massage her chin with a free hand. Her heart was beating insanely loud and strong, warmth spreading through her whole body and keeping her hands busy with her chin seemed to make sense. He continued, seemingly lost in a world of her. His smile spread foolishly across his face, his eyes glazed in love as he spoke.

"I love how beautiful you look, even for a human, from the tips of your hair in the sunlight to your itty-bitty shoes. I love your personality and your heart, your understanding and forgiveness. I love your perfection and even more your so-called flaws. I love the way you say my name, how I can always tell what you think about me when you say it. I love the way you're Princess, the way you're Peach. I love-"

"Bowser," Peach said calmingly. As she said his name, she considered what he must think from just those two syllables and her heart swelled just a bit more. "Bowser, you don't need to tell me these things."

"Why not?"

Unable to find a better answer, Peach took a deep breath. She removed her hand from her chin and tightly held his finger that was resting on the bed. "Because," she said quietly, "I know." Her words were almost a whisper, but Bowser knew exactly what she meant.

His eyes locked with hers. They stared for a few moments, Peach still clutching his finger.

"I love you, Princess Peach," the mighty koopa king gently reminded her. The princess lying next to him sighed. She closed her bright blue eyes and inhaled his musty, smokey scent.

"I don't want to go home, Bowser." Peach's words were broken and scratchy, and she didn't dare open her eyes just yet.

"You wouldn't have said that a few days ago. Glad you finally came to your senses."

Peach smiled; ever so happy he was here to lighten her mood. Of course, that only led to it darkening again. "Bowser," she murmured. Although she hadn't intended to sound alluring, her murmuring spread chills through Bowser's body. "Bowser, I don't want to go home because…"

With his thumb, Bowser gently massaged the pale hand that was gripping his index finger. His quiet solace gave Peach the confidence to open her eyes and continue. "Because you're not there. I…I'll miss you."

Bowser's heart was fluttering too fast and his love was too deep to joke to the princess. He couldn't bring himself to comment on what she said…in fact, he couldn't seem to form any words at all. In the quiet, Peach continued.

"No one at home loves me like you do. I don't think _anyone_ loves me like you do…it's so…nice. No one makes me laugh like you do…no one makes me feel safe like you do…no one makes me feel special like you do…no one…" Peach's voice began to falter and Bowser could tell she couldn't speak much longer. Her crystalline blue eyes, draped in sparkling tears, told Bowser everything else her parched throat couldn't.

He inched closer to her and she willingly accepted his gesture, putting an arm on his and the other arm she slid under his neck. He held her, running his hand up and down her back as he inhaled her sweet, pure scent. He felt her shake just slightly as she started to cry. Bowser would have given anything to have Peach cry about going home after a kidnapping, he would have given anything to have her sob about leaving him, but now that it was actually happening, now that his princess was in his arms and her heart was breaking, he would do anything to stop it.

"Peach," he whispered. She sniffled in response and stopped shaking. "Peach, I love you, and I'll always love you. No matter where you are, who you're with, I'll always love you. I'll always be thinking of you and if you remember that, I'll make you feel special, make you feel safe, make you laugh. And I can always kidnap you if you feel lonely surrounded by a million people."

Peach pulled her face from Bowser's chest long enough to let him see her smile. "Thank you." She sighed and placed her head back on his yellow-ridged chest. "I knew that, but it's so nice to hear it. No one else could say that and mean it, Bowser. No one." She smiled again as she felt him squeeze her closer, giggling a bit as well.

Snuggling closer into the warmth, Peach mumbled, "you're soft."

"So I've heard," Bowser teased, running his claw through her luscious hair. They were silent for awhile before Peach asked when she had to leave. At that reminder of reality, Bowser felt like he'd been floating through the air and had just been shot back down to Earth. "Well, no one's come to wake you yet, so…we don't have to deal with that yet."

Peach hadn't thought about someone coming in to wake her up, hadn't thought about someone seeing their king clutching her in her bed. Uncomfortably, Peach said, "but if someone comes in, what will you tell them?"

Bowser grinned, although he knew Peach, her face stuffed into his soft underbelly, couldn't see it. "I'll tell them I slept with Princess Peach."

* * *

**Author's Note: **I'm not sure if you can tell the difference between my old writing and new writing in that last bit, but it sure was fun to go through and give it tweaks. Honestly, I probably would have written that scene a very different way if I hadn't already written it, so I liked relying on my old view of how this would go. And I'm going to plug my blog again, because I just deleted three lines of AN about that last bit. :P So go read it there, if you're honestly curious.

Next chapter is going to be interesting for all of us, I think. There's not much I can say about it, because there's not much written yet. But I _can_ say that I have a schedule planned out, and 42 is going to be an AWESOME holiday present once it's updated. Even if I have to cut bits out of the story to make sure you get the content I want you to get during that chapter. Because it's honestly the very least you guys deserve for your ridiculous patience.

-Razzi


	41. Plane Preparations

**Foreword: **Don't you just LOVE when you _think _you posted a chapter, but you never really hit submit? Yeah...it would have been even MORE on-time/early, but this authoress is a little dumb sometimes. ;)

This chapter's a little sadder than most, but that's kind of necessary. Nothing you should need tissues for, unless you're just sad that it's taken me 34 chapters to get Peach out of the Darklands.

Speaking of which, I still own nothing of Nintendo's. Except my new paragoomba keychain, which, I have to admit, is pretty tight.

* * *

Saturday morning, Toadsworth arrived at the castle gates earlier than he had all week…including the frantic days in the week's beginning. He was parked, inside the castle, and ordering toads around before the sun was even up. "Pip pip, buddos. We have a doozy of a workload this morning, and I don't want to hear scruff about it!"

The toads were running every direction they could, mostly trying to _look_ busy. Toadsworth had been driving them like slaves to deal with his own personal stress, but there really wasn't much left to do. Peach's bag for Grand Canal had been packed for three days now, and repacked fourteen times since then. Har T. had prepared the lunches already, and they were simmering in catering vans for the hours left until they left for the airport to greet Princess Peach. Seeing as she wasn't even leaving the airport that day or due to come home for another week, cleaning the castle was pointless. But they had done that, too.

"Toadsworth, we've run out of things to do!" Toadette complained. "You can't keep pushing the toads around. Poor Integree T has mopped the same ballroom three times this morning…and it's not even eight yet!"

"Hullo, poppet, but unlike _some_ blokes here, I actually care about what the castle bloomin' looks like when Peach gets home, wot wot!"

"We're freaking _ready_, Toadsworth! And has it occurred to you that you may be worrying about the wrong things? We don't know what gate she's arriving at, what gate she's leaving through, and we haven't seen the Mario Brothers for days…they're supposed to pick her up with Daisy, aren't they? She's not even going to _see_ the castle!"

Toadsworth groaned, putting a hand to his temple. "Toadette. M'love. I don't think you've quite gathered how the ole' think-tank works." He put an arm out for her to take and escorted her away from the grand hallway to a quiet corner where the sky-painted walls met.

"This entire bloomin' week I've had to deal with things I can't figure out for myself. It's right blustering and drives me simply off the rocker. Though I'm quite certain you'd gathered that already, smart ole' bean that you are. I already figured those things you mentioned to be difficult to figure, so I did a lovely little process called _delegation_, marm. It's abso-bally-lutely fantastic. See, some other brilliant toads get the problems that are too big for one Toadsworth to get sorted through; one bloke is contacting the Mario Brothers, one is dealing with the airport to figure out her gates and arrival times, one is over traffic and weather internationally to guesstimate late arrivals and problems that may arise, and one is routinely checking up on those three. _That_ fine fellow contacts me every five or so."

He tapped her shoulders, offering her a smile. "Tha' way, I only have to deal with things I _know_ I have under control, like the general cleanliness and atmosphere of the castle. Stewing around like a lame-duck would render me insane, and I'm too frazzled to be able to handle the other issues."

"But Toadsworth, do you really think you need to have everyone else going insane with menial labor just to keep _you_ sane?"

"Cogswallop," Toadsworth replied, pushing her comment aside with a wave of his hand. "Not _everyone_ is doing menial labor."

With impeccable timing, King Toadstool interrupted their conversation, a frilly apron around his waist and under his fat rolls. "Sorry to intrude, Toadsworth, but where does the dirty water go again?" He raised a bucket of grey water, a few dust mites floating around. "I'd put it in the moat, but they're dredging that right now and I don't want to be a bother."

"Good heavens, sire! What are _you_ doing working with a bloomin' mop?" Toadsworth stuttered, ignoring Toadette's smug _Itoldyouso_ looks.

"Just doing the work your helpers assigned me, Toadsworth. 'Lift where you stand' and all!"

"Isn't there something more _productive_ you could do, sire, considering your regal potential? Maybe taking a li'l siesta or getting a spot of tea?"

"Highly unproductive," King Toadstool grunted. "My daughter's plane is arriving today, and if everyone _else_ is in such a tizzy about it, I ought to help."

"Well…you could order everyone else around as I am, I suppose," Toadsworth muttered, biting his lip as he looked around for Toads to be ordered around.

"Now, as King, I can't stand for that. We do not give orders where completely unnecessary, Toadsworth. If you wouldn't like me to finish with this mopping, I suppose I could find some delegate work to handle. There are a lot of people asking questions about Peach and her whereabouts and schedule, and we've been putting them off, but that's no reason to not give a polite 'get back to you soon' postcard…"

"Yes, yes, do that…" Toadsworth replied, bowing low to the king, but still seeming brash.

The king rolled his eyes before he walked away, politely handing a bored-looking toad his bucket and ordering him to dump it as far from the castle as he chose to go. The toad looked absolutely delighted.

"Do you see what I mean, Toadsworth?" Toadette began. "You're being completely-"

She was cut off when a lanky toad ran up to the two of them, his blue-and-green cap barely fitting. "Sir! Status report!" he chirped.

"Jolly good! Rattle 'em off, ole' chap!" Toadsworth sang, turning to ignore Toadette completely.

The lanky toad yanked out a clipboard from his messenger bag, fiddling with the three walky-talkies that were rattling around inside it as well. "Mario Brothers determined to be at the Sarasaland Castle, attended by the Sarasaland servants and royalty. Brothers not yet contacted directly; deemed to be asleep. Peach's flight to the airport is still undetermined, and the air patrol has yet to receive any out of the ordinary flights scheduled to land. Current flights scheduled to land within an hour of noon from nine locations; will be given if requested. Flight from Toad Town Airport to Grand Canal still on schedule. Traffic in Toad Town is at a normal procession. Traffic at each of the nine airports is at a normal procession, except at Dry Dry Desert, where there seems to be a power-outage and Leaky Cauldrip, where the traffickers have gone on strike. Weather as expected at all nine locations except Yoshi's Island (thunderstorm), Gusty Gulch (sandstorm), and Gorilla Glacier (blizzard). Any other requests, sir?"

"That'll do. Good show, guv'nah. In five, then?" Toadsworth shook the toad's hand and turned back to the sighing Toadette. "What seems to be the tiff _now_, love?"

"You're _ridiculous_. That's the 'tiff', Toadsworth. How much of that update has changed in the last five minutes, eh? And you have the king working? Did you even realize you were ordering _him_ around?"

Toadsworth stuttered, unable to find a word, just listened to Toadette continue her tirade about his insanity. "Alright, alright, shut it!" he bellowed, getting the attention of everyone scrubbing down the grout of the main hall. "I'm just a bit…frazzled!" He held onto his cane as he shook, and took a deep breath. "Perhaps I ought to just wait Peach out at the aeroport…read a good book or summat."

"That would be wise."

"Dane T, dearie! Can you get help preparing the vans?"

The tiny toad spun around, flustered by the attention from her idol. "They're all packed already, sir."

"With everything?"

"All of Peach's bags, including her extras are in the main van. The catering van is prepared. And the security guards are in the armored truck already. All that's missing is you, sir."

"Well then…ehem…Toadette, you and the King are in charge until I get back. Good show, mates…"

xxxx0o0o0o0o0o0o0xxxx

With a hiss, the blinds streaked open and hot, Sarasaland sun poured into Luigi and Mario's room. Daisy raced from the windows and onto their beds, each one in turn, screaming at them to wake up. "We gotta go! We gotta go!"

"Go where?" Luigi asked, groggily. Mario was trying his best to grab the bouncing princess's leg and throw her off the bed, but he was still too disoriented.

Daisy leapt to straddle Luigi's body, not minding that if he was coherent enough he could probably look straight up her skirt. "To Toad Town! Peach's flight arrives in _three_ _hours_ and we still have to drive there…and you two aren't even dressed!" She grabbed Luigi's bare hands and yanked him upright, kissing his cheeks to stimulate him to wake up. It certainly worked, and soon, Luigi was helping Daisy stimulate Mario to life.

After just a few minutes, they were up and pulling on their overalls. Daisy was downstairs, helping her servants load her luggage into the Mario Brother's truck. There was quite a bit, especially since her father had enlisted the help of the royal dressers in packing. Daisy didn't have the heart to tell them that she'd probably buy half her outfits there (so she could wear what she wanted without the royal shopping consultant's permission) and just wear one or two packed outfits for the other days. He seemed so happy to watch them pile dress after sundress into the suitcases.

Soon, everyone could hear the familiar _ba-thunk, ba-thunk_ of luggage coming down stairs. Mario and Luigi pulled their considerably lesser number of bags around to put in the back of the truck, and the attendants rushed around them, trying to help best they could. But there seemed nothing they needed help with.

Daisy walked right through their busy, nervous running paths and put her arms around the Mario brothers. "Are you guys ready?" she cheered. They affirmed their answers, and she squealed with delight. "I can't _wait_ to see what Grand Canal's like! And I can't_ wait_ to see Peach and hear about her mystery vacation!"

"It should-a be good," Mario agreed, his moustache raised in a slight smile. "We should get-a in the truck," he added. "Think how mad Toadsworth would-a be if we were-a late."

Luigi shuddered at the thought. "I would-a thought he had called-a by now."

Daisy laughed. "Have you guys not checked your phones? He's had toads calling quite constantly since five this morning!"

Mario felt his over-all pocket, pulling out a phone with a black screen. "I guess-a I left it off."

Luigi tried turning his on, but it died immediately. "Mamma mia, I don't-a think so, brah. I think Toadsworth and-a his calling _killed_ our batteries."

Daisy took their phones and couldn't help but laugh. "We'll charge them on the way. He shouldn't have anything to worry about anyway…it's _just_ a vacation."

xxxx0o0o0o0o0o0o0xxxx

Peach was smiling and giggling as she shared small-talk with her assistants. Valkoopy had requested to help her pack, as had a few more of Bowser's servants who had grown especially fond of the princess. Her suitcases were packed, the floors were vacuumed, the bathroom was scrubbed, and everything was in even better condition than it was before Peach arrived. But nobody in the room seemed all too desperate to leave.

An older-looking Boo faded into view in the doorframe. He cleared his throat and looked at the room full of attendants. "King Bowser and the royal children would like to see Princess Peach before she leaves, if it's not too much to ask."

"But she's leaving and we might never see her again!" one insistent mouser squeaked.

"Which is precisely why she needs to leave, miss," the Boo reminded.

"I _would_ like to see them. But if you guys wanna bring my bags and stuff to the airplane, I can give you goodbyes there…no need to say goodbye too early!" Peach chirped. She followed the Boo out the doorway, hearing all the muttering behind her. She peeped into the doorway and waved. "I'm serious, guys! I'll see you soon…_promise_."

The Boo floated ahead, making sure Peach was behind him. "That was very genial of you, Princess."

"I'm going to miss them, so…"

"Madam, you don't even _know_ them. You're just going to miss the palace itself, and you connect them with the experience you've had this week," he determined flatly.

Peach was taken aback just slightly, surprised by his straight tone in determining the situation. Before the Boo mentioned it, she hadn't even supposed that it was strange she was going to miss complete strangers so much. "How long did it take you to figure that out?"

"I've been working in the Palace since they hollowed it out for habitation. I pick up on things quickly."

"Why have you stayed? Couldn't you choose a more…exciting after-life? Or maybe one with other Boos around?"

The Boo chuckled. "Madam, there is _nothing _more exciting than living in the Volcano Palace. And frankly, I like it better among the living. Trying to exist among other Boos for my eternities would be very boring…at least this way, there's a complete change in cast every eighty years or so."

"But don't you miss your friends when they die?"

"Of course not," he answered straightly. "The way this palace works, every corner I turn I see the past. The engravings on the wall don't _just_ cover the royalty. If you look close enough, there are stories of daily lives of everyone. I'm engraved in the walls 3,976 times. My friends are never really gone. Not to mention, they influence those who continue after them. As long as the memories are there, having a loved one missing from you can be a lot better than having them around you."

Peach pondered that, deciding that these words of advice could get her through leaving the Palace. But the Boo interrupted her, apparently aware of what she was thinking. "It's not as easy for you living folk. You haven't lived through hundreds of generations of practice with death and departure. For you, leaving here is going to be, pardon my language, absolutely sucky."

"Glad to have your encouragement," she muttered sarcastically.

As they rounded the corner and ended up in an unfamiliar corridor, the Boo faded away and Peach was rushed by all sides by the eight koopalings. "Mama Peach!" Bowser Junior screamed, loud enough to be heard over all his siblings' shouts. "Mama Peach, pick me up!"

She didn't have much of a choice, as Junior had been scrambling into her arms, pushing off of Morton's face to get more height. "Junior, I can't only pay attention to you!" She laughed, hugging him tightly before setting him back down. "I have no idea how I'm going to live without you guys!"

"You should, like, take us with you on vay-cay. It'd be totally better than, like, drooling around this, like, pit of boring."

"YEAH, Mama Peach! Bring us with! Or at least bring me, Mama Peach! I wanna go I wanna go I wanna go!" Junior squealed, bouncing up and down.

"Wendy, don't be ridiculous! Peach can't take us with her," Iggy groaned. He completely ignored Junior's whining. "Not unless she brings _Dad_ too!" He turned to Peach, grinning as if his idea was the best in the world.

Peach opened her mouth to answer, but Morton beat her to it. "You clobbering clod-head, that was _my_ idea, idea-stealing clod-head! You and your stupid stupidness should go sit in a corner and eat your clod-head smelly face off."

"Morton, you continue to astound me with your unintelligible vituperations. Though they be thunderous, it matters much more that they actually have panache and purpose."

"I'll panash _your_ purpose!" Morton roared back at Ludwig, but Roy stepped in front.

"'Ey, whatchu doin', bub? Dis is _Mama Peach's_ last day. We ain't about teh screw it up for her, aight?"

"Hey Roy, did you see King Dad yet?" Larry asked. He had scooted himself next to Peach during the commotion and was gripping her tightly as possible. "I thought he wanted to see Mama with us!"

"King Dad said he wanted to get Mama Peach flowers," Lemmy replied. "He told me to tell you guys to wait for him."

"And you're, like, telling us _now_, dunderhead?" Wendy asked, her hands on her hips.

Lemmy shrugged. "I fergot."

The koopalings were in uproar again, quickly fighting with each other as well as against Lemmy. "Hey! Guys!" Peach shouted, silencing them all almost immediately. "One of you find your Dad. The rest of you, stay here and make up. I don't want to leave with you all mad at each other for something so silly."

"Sorry, Mama Peach," Larry muttered, sweeping his foot along the ground. "We're just…really upset you gotta go."

"I'm upset, too," she agreed quietly. "But this isn't goodbye forever, I'm sure." She tipped Larry's head up and smiled at him, then looked around the group. "Knowing your father, I'll be back here before I even have a chance to unpack."

They laughed, agreeing and happily on a subject that was a lot more pleasant and amusing. They hadn't even delegated someone to find Bowser when he showed up, huffing and puffing with a koopa tearing down the halls after him, crumpled flowers in his hand.

"Peach!" He roared with joy. "Out of the way, buggers," he muttered as he parted the sea of his children, lifting Peach up and spinning her around. She laughed and pleasantly hugged him back. Bowser set her down and grinned at her. "You look so beautiful. I didn't think you could get any more beautiful than you already looked today…but you somehow did it. You're probably just more awake." He chuckled and added, "I sure am."

"Bowser," Peach said, hoping to sound like she was chastising him, but very much aware that her smile was winning through in her voice. "You can't talk like that. Everyone will be confused!"

Bowser looked around, realizing what he had said around his children and gasped. Hoping to cover his flub that his children were only giggling about, he shoved the crumpled flowers at Peach. "Sorry they look so cruddy. I had to run here once this koopa said you all were already here."

"Where is here, anyway?" Peach asked, looking around the unfamiliar corridor.

"It's another gift I got for you," Bowser answered with glee. He walked over to a door, cloth hanging over a placard. Dramatically, Bowser opened the door to reveal a large, open room, much like a courtyard. The late-morning sunlight was pouring in from the wide windows on the back walls, making the fake grass shimmer. It was lined with stone seating and colorful banners. In the center of the room, 22 feet by 20 feet, a painted court sported a 36-inch net.

Peach laughed, grabbing Bowser's hand as she looked at the court. Not only was it the perfect dimensions for pickleball, it had a pink mushroom painted on either side of the court. In the corner there was a crate filled with hard paddles and wiffle balls, marked with another pink mushroom. It was very, very obviously built for her.

"Now," Bowser started with blatant pride, "you have another reason to come back. We need you to teach us how to play this 'pickleball' game so we can use our new court."

The koopalings began chattering excitedly; Bowser hadn't told them about this project, and while a few of them were preoccupied with deciding who got the "points" this had accrued in the matchmaking bet, most were just excited about a new room for the new game.

"Come on," Bowser urged, taking Peach's hand and leading her in. "I want you to be first to use the court."

"I don't think I have time, Bowser," Peach replied. She looked longingly at the court, but then up at the clock situated in Bowser's stone jaws, set above the door. They only had a few hours until noon, when Peach was supposed to be _at_ the Mushroom Town Airport.

"Just one volley," he whined. Bowser pouted his lips and stared his dark eyes into Peach's, winning her over finally when he ran his hand down her arm.

"Okay, okay," she hurriedly agreed, hoping to suppress the shivers that she didn't need before her flight. "Grab two paddles and a ball; quick!"

"You mongrels get on the stands and watch your mother break in the room!" Bowser barked. Without another word, the koopalings raced to seats, shouting and screaming over who got where. Roy immediately burnt his insignia onto the top-row middle seat, declaring it was his and anyone who sat there _ever_ would get that same insignia on their tail, "permanently, via yo favorite burnmister, Roy."

By the time they were settled, Peach was standing in her correct stance, Bowser across the court also ready. She bounced the ball once, threw it up and served it. The ball whizzed through the air, and Bowser returned it with nothing but a bunt. Though Peach's dress was impeding her running, Bowser had no desire to win and end the volley. That just meant she'd go home.

They played back-and-forth for almost five minutes when Peach dropped her paddle and caught the slow-flying ball in her hand. "Bowser," she said, "if I can catch it in my _hand_, you're not trying. Where are your fireballs?"

He shrugged. "Guess we'll just have to play again!"

Her return smile was weak. "We will…but I really have to get on that plane…" After a melodramatic sigh, Bowser nodded. He barked orders at his kids to get to the 18C hangar, and after they put away their paddles and the ball, Bowser and Peach followed.

He closed the door behind them, and whipped off the cloth from the placard. Thus, they left the officially broken-in "Peach's Pickleball Preserve" alone and empty.

xxxx0o0o0o0o0o0o0xxxx

Bowser looked over the plane. It was just as he had asked; plain grey with a vague company name stamped across it. No royal colors, no telling pictures, not one Bowserish marking at all. He couldn't stand to watch Peach as she gathered the koopalings, but he couldn't stand to ignore them, either. Bowser compromised by standing in front of the plane's stairs, watching from a distance where he could watch without having to hear them.

For all her worries about being late, Peach didn't seem to have anything more important to do than give the koopalings parting words of wisdom. She hugged Ludwig first, then mussed with his hair. They chatted about ideas for his future songs, he mentioned regrets for things she hadn't heard yet, and Peach made promises to share his released pieces with her friends in the Mushroom Kingdom and give him more world renown. Most of their conversation went over Bowser's head, especially on his son's half.

She hugged Lemmy much tighter than she had with Ludwig, now talking to him too softly for Bowser to hear. He seemed to have tears in his eyes and didn't have anything to answer. Peach backed up a bit, and Bowser watched as his son flushed up his face and blew a controlled flame. Peach shrieked with laughter, hugging Lemmy again and wiping away his tear with her glove. As he watched, Bowser didn't even mind that his son was showing such weakness. It was taking the mighty koopa king everything he had to not cry as well.

Peach turned to Roy next, putting her hands on his shoulders. She laughed at something he said, then shook her finger. She told him things that made Roy shuffle his feet and wring his hands, and he noticeably sniffled. Then, with his face down, Bowser could just barely tell he was giving her an honest reply. Peach gave Roy a quick hug, and afterwards his position quickly changed. He was probably warning her to never do it again.

Her words of advice to Iggy seemed to be very detailed…he almost seemed like he was taking notes. Then again, almost everything Iggy thought about was like he was taking notes. After awhile, he began fussing with his glasses, talking fast to her. He then grabbed his hair and mussed with it until it looked like a fountain on top of his head. Then he pointed eagerly at his shell. Peach laughed and nodded, then shook her head. From what he could tell, Bowser figured they were discussing Iggy's Mohawk, a concept that eluded the king completely. But from their expressions, the conversation had meaning beyond Iggy's appearance. He smiled genuinely at Peach, then gave her a hug of his own.

Wendy pushed Morton ahead of her, who immediately began mouthing his sister off. Peach put a hand on Morton to quickly shut him up, and started to hold his attention. Whatever words Peach was saying meant a lot; Morton was doing more listening than he usually ever did. He didn't even have anything to answer with, and just grinned up at Peach; a motion that meant more than any words he could have said.

Larry was on an emotional verge before he ever got to Peach, and began spilling out his soul as soon as he got there. She held on to him in a hug as he continued to blabber, and Peach comfortingly ran her hand through his hair. Once he was finished, she pulled away and held onto his shoulders at arms length. Larry's eyes were glued to Peach's as she spoke to him. He nodded multiple times, hanging onto her words for dear life. Finally, she gave him one last tight hug and Larry ran off.

Now that she was the only one left, Wendy ran over to Peach and threw her arms around her. She sobbed and whined and cried, not afraid of letting go of her tough attitude and much more afraid of letting go of Peach. The princesses cried together, and Peach whispered things into Wendy's ear. She pulled apart and Wendy wiped her eyes. Then she gave one last hug to Peach, complete with a dramatic sob, and went off to join her brothers seated on the floor.

Junior was nowhere to be found.

Peach walked over to Bowser, and he looked into the plane. "She's coming; we can probably get going now," he told the pilot.

On his command, the engine roared to life. Peach joined Bowser and she waved frantically at all the koopalings and all the servants who had come to wish her goodbye. Peach turned to Bowser and desperately asked, "This isn't goodbye for you, right? You're coming on the plane, right?"

"Of course I am, Peach," he answered. "I don't want to spend a single moment without you that I don't have to."

She smiled at him, glad he felt the same. Her smile fell as she looked at the waving crowd. "Where did Junior run off to?"

"I don't think he wanted his goodbye yet…I think he thought that this way, he wouldn't have to deal with it. I'm sure you'll see him again."

She sighed and nodded, looking out one last time at the crowd of people she'd grown to love. "Let's go. I can't leave Toadsworth waiting." She stepped into the airplane with Bowser, and the stairs automatically closed behind them, forming another part of the plane's wall.

If Peach wasn't so depressed, she'd probably be thrilled out of her mind with the airplane. It was the very definition of a private jet, completely unlike the plain outside. A wrap-around couch lined the walls, and a round table sat in the middle with more chairs. There were three televisions at different angles coming from the ceiling, as well as a full-service buffet in the front. But the thing that caught her eye the most were the windows.

She sat down on the couch, turned around to see the Darklands. Bowser sat next to her, putting a hand on hers and staring at the floor. They were silent as the plane grew louder and louder, rumbling down the runway and taking off just before the hangar's dropoff. Peach craned her neck as she watched the giant Volcano where she'd lived for the past week disappear. The city wasn't there to see, even though it was broad daylight. The pollution was especially thick, almost daring Peach to miss it.

Eventually they were above the clouds and the view completely. Not even the occasional grinning nimbus could give Peach her smile back. She leaned against Bowser searched for her voice. "I shouldn't be this upset, Bowser. I'm going back to see my friends, family, and country. I'm going back to my life. I didn't even _ask_ to go on this…adventure."

"I wish I could make you happier," he replied.

She laughed. "I think that's the problem. You _have_ made me happier. It's going to be hard for me to be as happy as you and your family has made me this week."

Bowser didn't have an answer, so he just squeezed her hand tighter. Maybe if he squeezed hard enough, she wouldn't be _able_ to leave his side. Maybe she wouldn't be willing.

xxxx0o0o0o0o0o0o0xxxx

Kamek grumbled as he looked through the day's itinerary. Bowser had moved everything to the next day _again_, as he wanted to fly home with Peach. This was _supposed_ to be their day to catch up on what they missed with meetings since Peach had arrived- they were several days behind! And knowing the King, he'd probably push everything yet another day on account of his need to "get over Peach's absence".

There were delegates who had to fly back to their families, decisions that were now costing millions in tax-coins to keep public leaders pacified, and construction problems that now kept the kingdom in disarray.

He was just contemplating the selfishness of the King and how they could handle things without him if possible when he felt a hand on his shoulder. Kamek turned and saw Kammy had shown up next to him. She looked from him to the itinerary and sighed. "His love-sickness is screwing the kingdom over again, isn't he?"

Kamek raised an eyebrow. "You're not standing up for him then?"

Kammy looked as if she was considering it. "I figure he doesn't need me for his PR anymore." She moved her hand from Kamek's shoulder to his hand and squeezed it way harder than necessary. "I have a new idiot to keep in line."

"Don't forget you have eight other ones to keep in line, too," he reminded her. Kamek was spinning in his head. He'd lost all circulation in his hand and the pain she was purposely inflicting was probably helping make his head spin, it was mostly just the fact she _was_ holding his hand.

"I should probably find those koopalings, shouldn't I?" she groaned.

"It'd be helpful for everyone," he agreed.

"I'd ask you to help, but your bones might break just trying to chase after _one_ of them."

"Naw, I should go. Someone needs to be around to call the ambulance when you die of old age."

"Fine then. Just don't slow me down with your thirty bathroom breaks along the way, grandpa." She took out her wand and he followed suit, and with symmetrical movements, they disappeared in one dark blue poof.

When they reappeared instantaneously, and after the sandy, itchy teleportation feeling subsided, they were not prepared for what they met. Both magikoopas had their wands wielded, eyes darting to count which koopalings were missing. At first, they didn't see anyone. Then Roy's even-toned, "hey, hag and mr. hag," got their attention.

The koopalings, all eight of them, were sitting on the floor silently. Morton was picking at his feet, Lemmy and Wendy were leaning on each other, and Larry kept wiping his eyes. Bowser Junior had his handkerchief tied around his mouth and hands in one of Iggy's genius engineer knots, but besides him, they all seemed silent of their own will.

"What's…what's going on?" Kammy asked suspiciously.

"Nothing, obviously," Iggy answered without a characteristic sarcastic snarl at all.

"You're not…plotting, or fighting, or whining, or hiding, or destroying anything. There's obviously _something_ wrong," she asserted.

"Kammy," Kamek interrupted, grabbing her hand and attention. "They're just sad about Peach leaving. They literally don't know what to do without her."

In response, the koopalings all nodded. Even Junior, in his odd containment contraption.

"Then why does Bowser Junior look like he lost a fight with his bandana?"

Larry answered, "he was crying too loud. It was annoying us." Again, all the koopalings nodded.

Kammy sighed, rubbing her temples. "You guys are so stupid. This _isn't_ the end of the world. Peach is going to come back again eventually. And what is she going to think if she shows up and all anyone has managed to accomplish is figuring out a new way to keep Junior quiet? Impressive as that is, you idiots can't spend your life moaning about a visitor leaving."

"Mama Peach wasn't just a visitor to us, Kammy," Larry explained. "She's our Mama. For some of us, the only Mama we've ever known…"

"…and for some of us," Wendy picked up, "totally the _best_ Mama we've ever known. Not to mention Dad's, like, a lot more tolerable when she's around."

"And he likes us more, too," Lemmy added sadly.

"Our increasingly plaintive state is no accident, Kammy," Ludwig began. "Peach's adoration for us is not only amendable, but a picture of honest camaraderie. Without her, we seem destined to revert to our state of malcontent."

"Not necessarily, Ludwig," Kamek answered. "You don't need Peach to be _present_ to honor what you've learned from her week here. And if you kids feel down, imagine how your father's going to feel when he returns. We do _not_ need the palace's atmosphere to turn into a funeral parlor's. If you keep your smiles plastered on and focus on the fact that Peach actually likes you now and will mostly come back on her own accord, there shant be a reason for the royal family to set an example of _depression_. And maybe you can help lift your father's spirits, as well."

They sat quietly, pondering Kamek's words. Larry sniffled. "And get that ridiculous handkerchief off your brother," Kamek added. They quickly obliged, and Junior took a deep breath of fresh air.

"Hey Kamek," Junior queried, "who won the Mama-Peach-and-King-Dad contest?"

A chorus of excitement bubbled from the koopalings and all eyes, including Kammy's, turned to him.

"I don't think the contest is over, guys," Kamek replied.

"But it's been a full week!" Roy shouted.

"That wasn't the conditions you gave me. You asked me to…" Kamek dramatically magicked up a scroll and read from it. "'Determine who of us Koopas makes Peach and Pops fall in love the most.' No other limitations. She has yet to fall in love."

"That's goomba crap!" Morton roared. "You're a goomba crap-headed, goomba crapper!"

He poofed the scroll away and shook his head. "As I see it, we're not finished yet. I'll pay you your dues, once she admits to having fallen in love."

The koopalings continued to complain, surprisingly staying seated and not rushing to hurt the loophole-loving magikoopa.

"Kamek, didn't you say you invested the pot in the koopa bank?" Kammy offered. The koopalings were only more outraged at hearing that the judge didn't even _have_ the money on hand. "Which MEANS," she added, raising her voice over the boisterous crowd, "by the time Peach admits her love it will have almost doubled in funds and the winner gets even _more_ prize."

They immediately shut up.

Roy bowed his head and threw up a hand sign. "We guess that's aight."

"You know, that, like, totally means the race is still on," Wendy commented. "Just cause she's, like, somewhere else doesn't mean we gotta stop our cupiding." She took Junior's hands and squealed with glee. The others exchanged more interested glances and started talking.

It seemed the koopalings were back. Kammy forced a smile as she congratulated Kamek on his good job. But she wasn't sure she was so pleased to have the eight miniature Bowsers just as annoying as they were before. Depression was so much quieter!

* * *

**Author's Note: **Did you recognize that pickleball room? It's the same room that they were building in chapter 22! Huzzah for continuacy! Speaking of which...if there's a character, a situation, or something else that you feel like I need to pick up again, I may have forgotten about it. I had horrible organization for writing most of this, and I would like to make sure I wrap up any loose ends I might have lying around, so go ahead and mention it. Thats one of the many, many things you readers are so good at, so keep it up. :D

Also...42 is really exciting me. It's probably going to be a shorter chapter than normal, because I feel like it's more important that I say what I want to when I want to than I stretch a bunch of meaningless fluff. Besides! If it's shorter, I can get it out in time to be a holiday present, like I intend. It will be VERY EXCITING. After all, 42 _is _the answer to life, the universe, and everything.

-Razzi


	42. Last Gift

**Foreword: **I really had planned on putting this up Christmas Eve, but spending more time with my family than expected made that...not happen. So, my apologies at not getting it up on the date I told some of you I would.

I haven't had a lot of time to revise this chapter, so I fear it's not as clean or concise as it should be...however, it includes what I was planning on including, so I still feel like it works for the holiday update. And as part of my holiday update, I'm having a nearly invisibly short A/N, which works since I don't have any of 47 written to warn you about yet. D:

Disclaimer: I don't own any of Nintendo's characters, though I certainly enjoy playing with them- especially on New Super Mario Brothers Wii! Koopalings, yay!

* * *

"..suthi tedring?"

Peach opened her eyes, her vision still blurred. Had she really fallen asleep? "Wha…what did you say?"

"Yuri neh, wouyu lisuthin tedring?"

"I'm sorry," she apologized, sitting up straighter and blinking. The pilot was standing in front of her, his hands behind his back as he waited patiently. "Could you repeat that?"

"Your Highness," he obliged, a little exasperated, "would you like something to drink?"

"Oh," she responded, "a strawberry water would be lovely."

The pilot nodded, turning to Bowser. Bowser's hand was still on Peach's her entire time asleep. "And you, sire?"

"A flaming bub-ulb, please. Make it stiff."

"Who's steering the plane?" Peach asked, a little calmer than most would.

"It's on auto-pilot, Your Highness. Just for the time being."

They were quiet. Peach was straining to remember if she had dreamt, but she must have been too tired. "Bowser, what's a flaming bub-ulb?"

"It's kind of a girly drink," he replied honestly, "but it's amazing."

Fairly soon, the pilot came out with two drinks; Peach's small glass was a faint pink, and Bowser's jug was filled with layers of green, orange, and red liquid with various fruit at the bottom. She watched as he sipped, smacking his lips with satisfaction.

"Stiff enough for you, sire?"

"Just perfect," he approved. Bowser set the jug on the table and looked up at the pilot with a hard stare. "But I'll need it a lot stiffer for the trip back."

The pilot nodded and returned to the cockpit, leaving them alone. Peach stared at her glass of water, swirling it around and watching the strawberry juice try to keep up with the less-dense water. "How long was I asleep?"

"Not very long," Bowser answered. "You kinda whistle when you sleep," he muttered, looking at her adoringly.

"I do?" Peach asked. She smiled. "Usually, Daisy falls asleep first and she snores like a pig. So nobody's told me that."

"Not even Mario?" Bowser asked.

She shook her head. "When we're together, we're always…_doing_ something. There's never time to just sleep. And when we plan relaxation, it usually gets crashed by a certain koopa."

Bowser chuckled, proud of himself for ruining her moments with Mario. "So now you've slept with me twice. Bowser-2, Mario-0." He grinned down at her and she laughed lightly.

"It'll actually be really interesting to see Mario when he's forced to relax. I think we have some quiet planned for this week, and we're far away enough that he won't be able to escape off to adventure." She took a sip of her water and added, "Unless you crash this, too."

"Is that a request?"

She smiled, but shook her head. "I'd love to see you again, but…I think it's important that people stop thinking you're nothing but a menace. And if you ruin our vacation again, no one will ever get to thinking that."

"Hey, that was _Junior_," Bowser corrected pointedly.

"Nobody sees the difference back home," she muttered. "I really wish they did, Bowser!" She took his hand and squeezed it. "I wish they knew how much of a musical genius Ludwig was, how clever Iggy's plans are, how brilliant Roy and his political schemes are, how sweet Lemmy and Larry can be, how funny Junior is, how dedicated Wendy is, how determined Morton is, how…absolutely wonderful your whole family are." Shaking her head, she added, "They just see them as villains."

"You did too, Peach," Bowser murmured. "You didn't even know I _had_ eight children until this week. And let's not get started on what you thought about yours truly…"

"You're absolutely right," Peach considered. "What changed?"

Bowser shook his head. There was probably a good answer, but he couldn't think of it at the moment. All he could focus on was that Peach, with all her good thoughts about the family at last, was leaving.

"I wish you didn't have to go," Bowser moaned. "It's going to seem so empty at home without you, Peach."

"And I had such a good time!" she agreed. "There are so many things I haven't seen…We still need to play a proper game on your pickleball court-"

"_Your_ pickleball court," Bowser corrected.

She smiled. "Right. And we need to see more of the town, and the palace, and…we never saw that amusement park in the palace!"

"And you missed the little kids on their field trips! And you haven't tried Cookoopa's cherry pie yet, and you haven't bungee-jumped over the central heating lava pool…"

"You _bungee-jump_ over that?" she asked, shocked.

He chuckled. "Of course! It's used to be my favorite thing when I was younger. Roy uses it as a threat all the time…brings up them fools who can't pay him, tie them up, and if they don't call his bluff, he pushes 'em over." Bowser laughed uproarisly. "Their faces! Are hilarious!" He laughed even louder and wiped a tear from his eye. "Then, they start hollering that they'll do anything, _anything_ if Roy just lets them back up." He grins. "Roy hasn't lost a single coin yet."

"And no one ever dies?"

"Nope. That wouldn't help anybody out, now would it?" Bowser suggested.

Peach gave a little laugh and agreed. "You know, there are plenty of things I think _you_ need to see in the Mushroom Kingdom, too."

Bowser waved his hand over the idea, taking a swig from his jug of flaming bub-ulb. "I doubt it. I'm in your kingdom practically once a month."

"But you're only there to wreck havoc! You've never seen the mushroom festival, or the Toadstool Gardens, or the Oink-Oink farm, or the annual Christmas Tree Pageant." She smiled, thinking about her kingdom. "You would love the Dog Days Games. Really, you've _got_ to come watch them next year. Maybe even sign up for a few!"

"Is this an invitation?" Bowser asked, not even bothering to mask his grin.

She laughed at his excitement. "It certainly is! And if you set up a contact, we could probably work it off as a political thing, too. Then maybe ease some of the enemy status Darklands and Mushroom Kingdom have going on."

"My delegates would _love_ that. You have no idea," Bowser murmured. He considered all the meetings he had missed, and even more, the ones he hadn't. Years of excuses would finally be finished; and on better terms than anyone expected from him!

"It's the least I could do. I did a lot of bad judging on my part, Bowser. I wish there was a way I could make it up to you."

He shook his head, brushing her hair with a free hand. "Peach, you've done more for my happiness this week than I think I've ever had. There's really nothing else you could do."

Regardless, Peach didn't quite agree. Did one week of being nice to Bowser really compensate for a lifetime of hatred and avoidance? Just because she was there for his birthday, did that mean anything more? He had been sweet, funny, strong, loving…she'd grown a soft spot for the Koopa King and she felt _terrible_ that all she had to show for it was a week of memories and a torn piece of bejeweled fabric. Of course, he hadn't helped her out any with birthday gift suggestions. All he'd asked for was her happiness during that week. Well, that and…

Peach looked down at her hands, one holding a hopeful glass of strawberry water, one clutching Bowser for dear life. She honestly didn't want to leave, she really didn't want to trade up a funny, loving, sweet, Bowser for…Mario.

Comparing the two, her plumber semi-boyfriend seemed seriously lacking. Certainly, Bowser had some major flaws he needed working on. He was rude, crass, socially awkward, tyrannical, juvenile, and boorish to name a few, but he _loved_ Peach and did everything he could to show it. It was obvious Bowser would do anything for her, and wanted nothing but to marry her and spend the rest of time making her happy.

Mario, by contrast, seemed like a perfect man. He was polite, quick, strong, appreciated her food and preferred to listen, and he was the bravest human Peach had ever met. But never once had Mario expressed that he loved Peach, or that he would be willing to slow down his life so they could be together. He had put off marriage (as well as vacation) as long as he seemingly could, and paid most attention to Peach when he was saving her from someone else's clutches. Peach laughed to herself. _Bowser would rather _die_ than let someone capture me even once_.

She looked over at Bowser, now staring out the window. The clouds were beginning to clear and there was land below them for him to inspect. "What are you thinking about?" she asked.

"Honestly?" Bowser asked with a smirk. Peach nodded. "I was thinking that it would be AWESOME if a giant chain-chomp just tore up all those fields…ka-chunk, ka-chunk, ka-CHOMP…and then there was nothing but giant valleys and all the cows would get stuck at the bottom."

Peach laughed and laced her arm around Bowser's bicep. "I should learn to think like you."

Bowser nuzzled the top of her head, doing all in his power to keep from kissing her and scaring her away. "No, you should stay exactly the way you are. That's why I love you."

"But Bowser…" Peach looked up at him innocently.

"What?" He asked, raising an eyebrow.

"If the chain-chomps are the ones making the valleys, why don't they eat the cows?"

Bowser rolled his eyes. "_Vegetarian_ chain-chomps, Peach. Why else would they eat fields in the first place?"

xxxx0o0o0o0o0o0o0xxxx

"That one! Get that one!" Daisy cheered, leaning forward between the two front seat in the Mario brothers' truck. "Aaah, Mario, you missed it!"

"I would-a not-a have fit!" he replied, driving on for the next parking spot. "The truck is-a too big." He cranked the wheel to try and fit between a station-wagon and a cloudcar, but Luigi screamed in protest. He hadn't seen and had almost crushed a small, koopa-sized motorcycle. "Mamma mia," Mario muttered, "This is-a why I prefer the warp-pipe."

They pulled back out of the spot and, in a reasonable amount of time with an unnecessary amount of grumbling, found a parking spot in the parking terrace. They hopped out and worked as a team, carrying as many suitcases between them as possible. "Remind me why we didn't bring a castle-worker to help bring these in?"

"It was-a _your_ idea to keep-a them home, Daisy!" Luigi groaned, wobbling under the weight of four stacked bags.

They managed to get the suitcases to a trolley, everyone's mood lightening considerably with the likewise lightened load. They pushed through the grand doors, entering the sparkling, high-ceilinged atrium of the airport. "I do love the Toad Town airport," Daisy whispered. "It feels like home. There's the baggage check!" They pushed the trolley over to the grinning Toad behind the desk.

"Good afternoon, sirs and madame. An' how kin I help y'all?"

"We have a flight we'd like to check our baggage for and get boarding passes printed out, please…it's the A17 Mushroom Air, 12:45 to Grand Canal."

"No problem there. Kin I have some identification?" On command, the three of them pulled out licenses and ID's. She checked them in, tuttering to herself as she clicked around the computer.

"Naow donch'all have the cutest names I've ever read! 'Mario Mario', what a _thrill _ter say!"

Mario looked awkwardly from Luigi to Daisy. "Have-a…have-a you not heard of us? The…the _Super Mario Brothers,_ you know? We…we save-a princesses."

She bit her lip. "No, cain't say I hayve…oh, wait just one minute!" She slapped the counter. "I _hayve _heard of y'all! I saw y'all on the news once 'er twice." She grinned and began to check in their luggage as the boarding passes printed. "Pleasure to meet local heroes."

When Toadsworth's vans pulled up, he led a train of toads into the airport, marching over to Mario, Luigi, and Daisy. Just as Toadsworth reached them and opened his mouth to chastise their lack of care for his nerves, the baggage-check toad squealed.

"Naow _you_ I recko'nize! Yer Toadswarth!" She bent down and picked up a signed copy of a book entitled, _What to do When Bob's Not your Uncle_. "Is' my _fav'rite_ book! What're you here for, sir?"

Taken completely aback, he was too distracted to yell at Mario, Luigi, and Daisy. "Well, madam, I was just going with these spiffy blokes to pick up the lady Princess from her aeroplane to give her and they a proper send-off for holiday. Mind if you patch me through to the gates?"

"Well, that would be just dandy! Do y'all have a boarding pass? Can't letchu through to the terminal without a boarding pass."

"You're printing out ours," Daisy replied, motioning to the brothers and herself.

"Don't mean to be a bother, but we haven't any tickets…we're not going on holiday with them. We just came right by to drop them off, y'see. But we _do_ have Federal Passes to get through security checkpoints…will that do?"

"I'll let it slide, Toadswarth," she agreed with a wink. "But only cause I like ya!"

They got past security, Mario and Luigi sort of grumbling about the situation, and Toadsworth genially leading his security team and the caterers through. At the terminal, the board with arrivals and departures shone down at them. As Toadsworth's reports had said, all nine flights scheduled to arrive within the hour were on time, except the blizzard at Gorilla Glacier had delayed the flight by one hour; still enough time for Peach to make a connecting flight.

"The terminal has only 20 gates. From this viewpoint we can see all nine Peach may come from, including the two private jetlines. Heff, do you have the chairs?"A bulky toad grunted a response, wheeling a cart of chairs over and taking them out. "Good show. I'm afraid there's naught left to do…but wait." He sat politely on a chair and a toad dressed like a waitress brought him a cup of tea. "And, of course, lecture you three on your complete disregard for my authority."

"In case you haven't noticed," Daisy muttered, "I have more authority in my pinky-finger than you."

"This is not an issue of Sarasaland authority, Princess," he retorted. "This is an issue regarding the Princess Peach, her safety, and the assimilated security of the Mushroom Kingdom. Of which subjects _I_ have supreme authority over, and do not bally well appreciate your usurping!"

"Princess Peach is _my_ cousin, and in the situation that her father and she lose authority, after my father, _I_ have been given right as dauphin!"

"Oh, don't disillusion yourself," Toadsworth sneered, "That was _years_ ago. This bloody plumber has more apt to rule a country than you do; let alone two!"

"She trusts me! And I trust her! You're the one who can't let her leave your sight for two seconds, and every single time you do, she disappears. Have you considered, Toadsworth, that maybe she's leaving you _on purpose_?"

"Why, you insolent little mandrake!" He hollered, standing up and spilling his tea. "What're you insinuating? That she _chooses_ to get kidnapped? You think you could do a better job o' protecting her?"

"I certainly could! If you gave her one _inch_ of space, maybe she'd learn-"

"One inch of space and she'd be bally _dead_!"

"Mamma Mia," Luigi voiced, tentatively looking at Mario. "They're going at-a eachother like-a cats and dogs."

Daisy towered over Toadsworth, yelling into his up-turned face as he spat into hers with over enunciation. They didn't stop until Heff T. forcibly lifted Toadsworth away from the princess. "Sir," he grunted, "You need to stop fighting. A plane just landed."

"Err, wot?" He muttered, uncurling his tense position and looking at his carrier. "Which one?"

"Do you think it's Peach's?" Daisy asked, breathing heavily to calm herself from the bought.

"Just as much of a chance as the others," Heff replied. "She can't answer her phone while in the air, so we won't know until she walks through a gate."

After being set down, Toadsworth brushed himself off and retrieved his cane. He led the group towards the blinking gate, a plane coming in from Yoshi's Island. They were all hushed as they saw the giant airliner touchdown in all its green-with-white-spots glory. After just a few minutes, the gate opened and the passengers, mostly yoshis and shy-guys, poured out to greet family and find luggage. Peach wasn't with them.

The group gave a collective sigh, and Toadsworth moved to peer over one of his assistant's shoulders. "The next flight is scheduled to arrive in ten minutes, sir," the toad said, answering an unspoken question. He dramatically crossed off "Yoshi's Island" from his list and tapped "Private Liner #1" with the pen.

"Hey-a, Daisy," Luigi said, taking her hand. "Is there something the matter?"

"What do you mean?" She asked, sitting down on one of Heff T.'s chairs.

"You seem…uptight. Angry, with-a Toadsworth."

"I guess I'm just worried." She looked at Luigi and glanced at Toadsworth, who was doing a poor job at pretending to not eavesdrop. Quieter, she continued, "I don't think there's anything _wrong_ with Peach, and I think she's perfectly safe. But it _is_ pretty odd to not know when she's coming, who she'd just been with, where she's spent the week…For heavens sake, she doesn't even know you and I are joining her and Mario on their trip. It's like we've stopped being friends for a week.

"I think, really, I'm mostly worried that this…could be our future. You and me doing our thing, she and Mario doing theirs…face it, Luigi; once Peach is queen, Mario won't be plumbing anymore. And she won't have time for her cousin."

"Don't think like-a that, Daisy," he cooed. "Mario and I are inseparable. You and Peach are even more-a so. This week, to me, only proves that even-a more."

Toadsworth stood up and approached Daisy, and though she was sitting, he was still barely eye-level. "Princess Daisy," he began, "I must offer my sincerest of apologies. I did not mean to begin a row with you…I suppose we both have just a tad too much on our plates at the mo'. Having your forgiveness would be absolutely brilliant."

"I guess fighting with a little mushroom shrimp right before I leave wouldn't be the best thing, would it? Dad would hate the poor tabloid publicity… 'Sarasaland Princess Flees the Continent After Lovers' Quarrel' or something."

"'L-Lovers' Quarrel'?" Toadsworth repeated with a bit of a stutter of shock. "I am in no way, nor shall I ever be, your lover, your highness! _That_ position has been taken by the bloke in green bobbing his way over there!"

"And _that's_ what makes it into the tabloids, Toadsworth," she winked. "Now shut your jaw- there's another plane coming in."

xxxx0o0o0o0o0o0o0xxxx

In Bowser's private jet, the seatbelt light dinged on and the pilot reminded them that they were beginning their descent. Peach immediately gripped Bowser's hand like a vice.

"Geez, Peach, what's the deal?" he asked. "You're not afraid of flying."

"Oh…sorry…" she released her grip, and immediately Bowser regretted his question."I guess I'm still worried to go home."

"Why should you be worried? You get to see your friends, your family…everybody loves you." Really, he thought, _nervous_ was the wrong emotion completely. Absolutely horrified to leave would be more acceptable.

"I don't know!" She answered, jittery. "Maybe I'm more worried that everyone will instantly know what happened this week."

"That you spent it with your sworn enemy?"

"More that I _enjoyed_ spending it with my sworn enemy," she replied. Bowser grinned back evilly. "I feel like I'll get off the plane and Toadsworth…because I'm _sure_ he's there waiting right now, probably with half an armada… he'll just see in my face that I've been off enjoying myself with the person on the bottom of his list of possibilities."

Peach began to talk faster and faster, playing with her gloves and spinning her hair. She seemed very worried, more than she had all week. Was she thinking it would be hard to leave? Difficult to spend some time without his family and among her own? Because if that was her only worry, she _clearly_ didn't realize how much Bowser was dreading the near future. Life without Peach was hard enough when he was only lacking her complaints. Now that he knew how happy they made each other from experience, he couldn't _stand_ even considering if she was gone.

"…and I don't know the first thing about steering a gondolier!" she shrieked. "How am I supposed to get by without knowing anything about steering gondoliers? Oh, um…I mean gondolas. With an 'a'. Steering a gondolier would be a completely different issue." She laughed uncomfortably and looked Bowser's face over. "Oh, my gosh. What am I doing? We're about to land and all I can do is complain about a vacation that you're not even invited to."

"I don't mind," Bowser lied. "As long as you're talking about something. It's nice to hear your voice."

"Still! You've been so good to me this week, and all I've done for you is…" awkwardly, Peach bit her lip, she caught his eyes and her eyes moved down his face. Even _Bowser_ felt awkward before she tore her attention away and started going on about flaming bub-ulbs and strawberry water.

"Peach!" Bowser roared lightly, grabbing her hands and her attention. She looked like a deer in the headlights, and swallowed her words. "Stop being so _nervous_. You're going to be fine…you'll get off the plane, see Toadsworth and Mario waiting for you, exchange some hugs, and get on the plane to Grand Canal. Everything will be fine. I wouldn't be surprised if Mustached-man was so conceited as to completely ignore the fact you've been gone all week, and Toadsworth will be too happy to see you alive to care at least until you're an ocean away. There's _nothing_ to be worried about."

"But I-" her mouth hung open and as her eyes hung on Bowser's resolute expression, she quickly closed her lips. There were evidently more protests behind them, but for whatever reason, she didn't want Bowser to hear any.

In Peach's awkward, forced silence, the plane touched down on the runway. The pilot's voice came over the speaker, announcing that "there are no available jetways at the moment, as this is a popular time for the airport". In effect, the plane drove around in lazy circles, waiting for the four planes that had landed previously within the hour to take flight or get out of the way.

"Well, Peach," Bowser sighed, "are you about ready to get off?"

"No!" she squeaked, wringing her hands. "I can't get off yet!"

"Umm…will you be ready when we get to a jetway? I mean, if you _want_ to stay on the plane and just go back to the Darklands, that's totally cool with me, but I thought-"

"I'll get off soon, but I'm not ready yet! I'm not brave enough. There are…prerequisites to my departure!"

"If I didn't love you so much, I would think you were crazy sometimes, Peach," Bowser laughed. "I think your voice has reached a decibel that only soul-mates and dogs can understand."

She laughed way too loudly, immediately covering up her mouth with her hands. Her eyes raced to Bowser's mouth again, then she abruptly shifted in her seat to face forward.

The plane came to a stop and the seatbelt light turned off. With a great deal of whirring, the stairs that built into the wall descended, setting nicely on the jetway and pointing towards its corner. When Bowser strained his ears, he could just barely hear the sounds of the Toad Town airport, but there was no way they could ever see the goings-on or hear their conversations.

The pilot came to the cabin, bowing politely to the royalty. "I trust you have some final goodbyes; as such, I will be attending the luggage in the rear of the plane. It'll be easier to check it to the Grand Canal connecting flight if I do it by hand. You never can trust those airport employees, you know." He walked over to Peach, and she stood up much too fast, gripping his hand fiercely. "It was a pleasure to meet you, Your Highness. I hope we see each other again someday."

"Goodbye!" she squeaked in response, pulling her hand out of his and squeezing it nervously.

Bowser watched the pilot leave, then turned to Peach. "Peach, is there really anything wrong? I don't want the last time I see you to be so…weird."

"I'm sorry," she muttered. "It's just…" Peach visibly relaxed as she looked at Bowser's eyes, as opposed to his mouth. His deep, dark eyes connected with hers and he felt goosebumps. "Have you ever felt like you got a really good idea, but then it was almost too late? Like you could finally repay everything you needed to, but you might not have the guts or means to do it?"

"Um…I guess. But I usually make sure there's no such thing as 'too late', and I try to make sure I have plenty of guts to spare for everything I do." He smiled at her, and she gulped. "Is that why you've been crazy? You got some awesome idea?"

"I guess you could say that…" she replied. "I don't know how awesome it really is. It just feels important to me. And if I go through with it, it's probably the craziest thing I've done in my life."

"Are you gonna hijack the plane while the pilot's gone and fly us to an exotic island?" Bowser asked, his eyes lighting up.

Peach laughed- her normal, tinkling, comfortable laugh. "No, Bowser. Not _that_ crazy."

"Does it involve you getting off the plane?" She considered it for a moment, then nodded. Honestly disappointed, Bowser tried to hide his sigh with a loudly placed, "well then! Let's get you off this plane."

"Bowser…" Peach stalled, "Can't I get…a goodbye hug?"

He grinned and squeezed her as tightly, yet gently, as he could. It was more platonic than he would have liked, but if they could leave on friendly terms, it was light-years better than the awkward feelings that Peach's epiphany had apparently been causing.

They pulled apart and Bowser smiled down at her. She looked back up, her expression hard, but much more pleasant than it had been, as if she had decided on fulfilling that crazy epiphany. She took his hand and they walked to the stairs that would separate Bowser and Peach for however long they needed to be separated.

She let go of his hand and took a step up on the stairs. "Bowser," Peach muttered, slowly turning around to face him. Peach looked into his eyes; with the help of the stair, they were almost eye-level.

"What?" he asked, still quite close to her.

"Before I go…"

He started to repeat the "what", but was quickly cut off as Peach took his chin in her gloved hand. Blood pulsed through his veins and he lost all ability to form that simple, one-syllable word.

Using his chin as a fulcrum, she pulled herself up on her toes, and pulled Bowser down to meet her. She closed her eyes and kissed him, throwing her other arm around his neck. Bowser was in complete shock, and every sense seemed to be in overload. He couldn't fathom what was happening; he couldn't convince his brain that he was _actually_ kissing Princess Peach. There was too much joy and excitement going on to comprehend anything at all.

She was holding on tight, to the point where one shoe slipped out from under herself, but Peach didn't notice or care about the reaction. She kissed him again, and finally felt his hand find her side, keeping her steady where her own arms may fail. Peach's eyes were closed, but they seemed to be rolling back into her head as every emotional overload she'd had that week came pouring out. She kept kissing him, but sense started to hit her like a sledgehammer as her other shoe starting to lose its footing.

Peach's lips smacked away from Bowser's as she fell back onto her heels and released his arms; he instinctively released her as well. She stumbled backwards a few steps, her face quickly flushing a tulip pink. Awkwardly, she turned around and made it to the corner of the jetway, dangerously wobbling the entire short walk, before she turned around.

Bowser was quivering in place as he saw her leave, unable to even realize he had a goofy grin plastered on his face. She had her own smile, shamelessly displaying her school-girl embarrassment. At last returning to her original sentence, she giggled, "Happy Birthday," then stumble-ran out of Bowser's sight and down the rest of the jetway.

Bowser stood there in the doorway, staring down the vacant jetway for a few minutes before the pilot returns. He may have said something to wake Bowser from his daze, but it didn't matter- he was in his own world.

Feeling began to return to the control of his brain, though his heart was still beating loud enough for the koopa king to hear and his burning and blushing cheeks couldn't settle down his smile.

Once he had control of his hand, Bowser brought a finger up to his lips, that sacred place where Peach had given him the birthday present he'd wanted his whole life. He found them, not nearly as rough as usual and _definitely_ pulsing with blood. He took his finger off and looked it over…there was fresh, pink lipstick residue. Evidence of heaven.

He looked at his finger and licked his lips, still able to taste a bit of Peach.

* * *

**Author's Note:** Merry Christmas, and have a safe remainder of your holidays.

-Razzi

**_EDIT: _**So...It seems not having anything to warn about for 47 was a poor choice on my half. At least half of my reviews seem to give the impression that a lot of you think/thought this is the LAST chapter of Change of Heart. That is completely untrue... I'm sure it would make a good ending, but it doesn't satisfy me. The story is going to be continued and you can expect an update next month, as usual. Trust me, when we get to the end, I won't be able to leave you guys with a one sentance A/N. I would rather explode.


	43. Aeroport

**Foreword: **I have to say, we're lucky I wasn't so completely lazy as to wait another week before posting and call it a Valentine's Day update. Because January was surprisingly busy, and I haven't had much time to work on 43 OR 44 at all.

And I have another favor to ask. Do you remember back in chapter 29 when I had the words line up with a song? Bowser sings again in this chapter, but it doesn't line up because I couldn't get it to work. However, the section he sings in is a LOT more fun if you know the song he's singing. So if you would please look up "Hooked on a Feeling" and get a feel for its silliness (you don't need the whole song), I think you'll enjoy his singing more. I know I enjoyed writing it and laughed a few times at the images in my head. I used the Blue Swede cover in my writing, fyi.

Disclaimer: I still don't own anything. Sorry, Nintendo and BJ Thomas, for using your stuff so weirdly.

* * *

Toadsworth's incessant mutterings and pen-tapping was starting to drive even Mario up the wall. With every _tap-tap-taptap_ and _scritch-scritch_, he was somehow managing to transfer his pool of nerves into everyone else in the room, including the koopa manning the terminal desk. From across the hallway, she too had begun tapping on her plane schedules.

"Toadsworth, would-a you mind…" Mario began, through his teeth, "calming down a bit? Maybe with a bit-a less…_tapping_?"

"I don't know what you're talking about, sah," Toadsworth replied, now fidgeting with the clickable pen-cap.

Mario's wrists were itching. If he had a fire-flower handy, there was no doubt the entire room would be in flames. He wasn't so much nervous about Peach; if there was anything wrong, she wasn't difficult to rescue. However, everyone in the room was in the worst sort of panic Mario knew- passive-aggressive terror. He could handle a castle full of toads, running around like chickens with their heads cut off. And he could handle his brother's teeth-chattering fright. But this quiet, toe-tapping, eye-twitching impatience wasn't something the man of action was used to.

A "plane arriving" light flickered on over the Gorilla Glacier terminal, and immediately the entire party got to their feet. They watched, some forgetting to breathe, as passengers started to file off. Gorilla, gorilla, shy guy, a family of boos (why ever they needed to fly was unknown), and more gorillas. Then, between an elderly koopa couple and a walking alligator, they spotted a tall blonde human, wrapped in a fluffly, white fur, her pink dress peeking out below.

Daisy fell into Luigi as Toadsworth barreled through the group, leading a mangled stampede of their greeting party, including Har T. and his team of caterers. The koopas screeched in shock, ducking into their shells just in time. Unfortunately for the blonde woman, she didn't see the stampede in time and had just flicked her hair out of her face when she was nearly tackled.

"Princess Peach! You've arrived!" Toadsworth bellowed, making to latch onto the lady's leg.

She screeched, lifting her leg away with perfect timing. Her high-heel pointed at Toadsworth, collapsed into a lump of brown toad on the floor. She looked at the group, grabbing at her fur with obvious terror. "Vat's going _on?_" She asked, an mountaineer accent in her still delicate voice. "Who are you people? Vhy did ze little one call me 'Princess Peech?'"

They looked from Toadsworth to the woman, embarrassment and disappointment dripping on their faces. "I'm sorry, miss," Luigi answered for them. "We mistook you for our-a friend. It is a good thing; you and she are-a both quite pretty." Daisy shortly smacked Luigi on the back of the head. "Well, they are!" He replied, ducking as she swiped at him again. "I thought it would-a be in poor manners to-a say 'you and she are-a both pretty, but not-a ever as pretty as-a this woman here', Daisy!"

She bit her lip, considering Luigi's excuse. "Fine," she decided with a bit of a satisfied smile.

"Zat is…very nice," the woman muttered, mussing with her rather Peach-like hair, "But I haf one more connection before I get home. I really must be on my vay."

"What's your connection?" Toadsworth grunted from the floor. "I apologize for our lack of propriety, ma'am. I'd like to make up for it by paying for your connecting flight."

"Oh, zat is not necessary," she sweetly replied, trying to break through the group. "My Nonna agreed to pay already…"

"No, on behalf of the Mushroom Kingdom, I insist-"

"Toadsworth, you-"

"Daisy, for pipping heaven's sake! Don't get into this battle of authority again, when this poor young wo-"

"Not _that_," she snarled, "_That_!" She pointed dramatically at the blinking "plane arriving" light three terminals down. "Another plane's here!"

"Remind me to pay you, got it, love?" Toadsworth hollered, spinning before they received an answer from the unfortunate Peach-like girl, and tearing down the hallway. The Mario Brothers, Daisy, and his fleet of toads trailed Toadsworth. He held his clipboard in front of his face; a poor choice that ended up with him falling flat on the floor and having half the group trip over him.

"Toadsworth!" Mario shrieked, sandwiched under his brother and the elderly toad. Daisy was the only one who had seemed to avoid the collision, and was about to help her friends out when she saw a flash of pink cloth peeking out from the jetway's doorway.

She dropped Luigi's hand and ran down the remainder of the hall, getting close enough to actually see her…Peach! Her cousin! Home at _last_ and safe and sound! "Peach!" Daisy hollered, waving frantically. "Peach, Peach, you're back!"

Princess Peach slowly turned her head over her shoulder, and she smiled wide at Daisy, but stayed where she was, leaning against the wall. "Hi, Daisy," she cooed, a huge smile plastered on her face. She started to giggle and said. "Look! I'm here!"

"I can see that," Daisy agreed with a stiff laugh, "But are you _really_ here? _All_ here?" She got closer and waved her hand in front of Peach, noticing her eyes follow the white glove at a considerably slower speed than they should. Daisy rocked back onto her heels and looked cross-eyed at her favorite cousin. "Okay, Peachy, this is a problem."

"I don't see any problem at all, Daisy," she replied, her smile going wide. Dramatically, she threw her arms around Daisy in a hug. "The world is a _wonderful_ place! There aren't _any_ problems, never ever!" Peach began to giggle, squeezing a very concerned Daisy until she saw the rest of the group coming up. "Toadsworth! Look at you!"

"Princess Peach, look at _you!_" He replied, a look of horror on his face. "You're…you're not wearing your crown!"

"What crown?" She asked, her eyes wide. "Oh!" Peach laughed, miming taking her tiara off her head. "I forgot I didn't have it. You didn't care when I left!"

"I didn't realize…you haven't had it _all week?_ Your highness, _what_ would Athorih T. say?"

"He'd probably say 'Welcome Home, Peach!' because you haven't yet!" Her nonsequitor answer was full of as much glee as she'd expressed since getting off the plane, and was followed by more of her giggles as lifted Toadsworth right off his feet and spun him around. "Hello, Toadsworth!"

She put him down and ran to Mario and Luigi, hugging them both simultaneously with one arm around each. "It's so fun to see you guys again!" She let go and grabbed their hands with equal affection, an act that set Daisy on the tip of her toes even more, and confused all the toads around them. "You haven't changed a bit."

"Um, Peach?" Daisy interrupted, tapping her shoulder. She spun around, her golden hair even more beautiful than normal. This glee had overcome her entire essence, it seemed. "Can I talk to you for a bit? In private?" Peach didn't answer; instead, she stared past Daisy and down the empty jetway she had just left. With a whirr, the plane out the window jumped to life.

Startled, Peach ran to the window and completely ignored Daisy's question. She smashed her face up against it to the point where it was completely impossible for anyone to read her expression. Daisy groaned, stomping over to Peach and wrenching her away from the window. "Peach. We need to talk."

"Okay," she replied, sneaking a peek out at the plane flying away. Daisy put her hands around Peach's eyes like blinders.

"No, Peach. We need to _talk_. And if you can't have a proper conversation, you need to snap out of whatever…this…is. Because either you're drunk or you've gone off the deep end, and neither of those things are going to make Toadsworth very willing to let you get on the plane to Grand Canal with Mario, Luigi, and me."

"Are you and Luigi going now, too? Oh, that's nice!" she squeaked. "That should be way fun. And I'm not drunk, Dayz." She shook her head in an ironically unconvincing manner. "I only had strawberry water on the plane. You can even smell my breath!" She went to breathe at Daisy, but quickly clamped her mouth shut. "On second thought, you _shouldn't_ smell my breath." She giggled. "But why would I be drunk? I hate alcohol and stuff like that. And you know I'm not crazy!"

"Then why are you acting like it?"

She opened and shut her mouth like a koi fish, clearly at a loss for words. She settled on giggling and shrugging. "Can we go see Mario now? I just remembered I need to hug him."

xxxx0o0o0o0o0o0o0xxxx

Mario had forgotten how honestly beautiful Peach was. He forgot how when he saved her, she would be so happy to be away from Bowser and back with people she loved, she would almost literally shine. How her facial features met up with perfect, dainty symmetry, and how her smile radiated warmth to everyone around. She seemed happier than she ever did right now. Clearly, she had missed them, and that made the little Italian plumber just blossom with pride.

The toads were all busy, security guards hounding on the princesses' conversation and the catering team preparing their elaborate lunch. Luigi was saying something to his older brother, and from his expression, he was clearly worried. But Mario wasn't listening- instead, he was watching Peach. She was just like a little girl, giggling and chattering with Daisy. The vacation was good for her. The last time he'd seen Peach, she had been such a downer. Talking about the future and worrying about schematics…this was the Peach he preferred to see. Happy, in the moment, and not worrying about anything except the people who made her happy.

With a smile, Mario remembered that this was the Peach he loved to rescue.

She daintily carried her dress as she ran towards him. It was amazing how, even without her tiara, Peach was just like a princess. Mario supposed that no matter where they went, with her glowing countenance and regal air, everyone would know they were Mario and His Princess. She finally reached him and joyously cheered, "Mario! You're here!" With just the slightest robotic feeling, she bent down and hugged him, holding him for exactly two seconds. She let go and smiled down at him. "Isn't it a lovely day for flying?"

Mario nodded and smiled back at her. Peach continued, prompted by Mario's silence, "Did you have a good week at the plumbing convention?" He nodded again. Peach's smile that hadn't left her face all week began to waver and seemed to return by force, but she was certainly still smiling. "Do you want to tell me about it?"

With just a few moments hesitation, Mario opened his mouth to speak, but Toadsworth cut him off. "I certainly think _you_ have more important stories to tell us, poppet. Let's prattle over Har T's lovely bought of snappers, eh?"

"Lunch!" Peach cheered, pulling away from Mario and running back over to Daisy, who had now reached her own boyfriend. "Don't you _love_ lunch, Daisy?"

"Peach…" Daisy muttered, cautiously, "you need to calm down. I don't know what's got-"

"Oh, look," she muttered, her eyes frozen on Daisy's and Luigi's intertwined fingers. "You and Luigi are holding hands."

"…we do that a lot," Daisy replied slowly.

Peach slowly looked back up at them, smiling with more pain in her eyes than she'd shown for months. "That's nice. I think I need to use the restroom."

Mario watched her leave, making sure that the security guards tailed her to the restrooms. He was completely oblivious to the downward spiral she had just stepped into, and simply smiled at what he believed was honest cheeriness. Once she was out of sight, he turned to the catering toads. "So," he asked, "What's-a for lunch?"

xxxx0o0o0o0o0o0o0xxxx

Bowser looked down at his lap, the seatbelt he didn't remember putting on securing him to the seat he didn't remember sitting in. He couldn't remember _anything_ that happened after the moment Peach left his view, and he just kept replaying over and over again everything that had happened before.

Nervously, his pilot occasionally looked into the cabin, making sure the love-struck, silent king was okay. He was far from okay, galaxies away from okay. Bowser was almost comatose with glee, literally incapable of jumping and laughing for joy. He had every movement of their first kiss perfectly memorized.

The way her hands felt on his face, keeping it close to hers.

The way his hands felt on her body as it pulled into his.

The scent of perfume in her hair, the taste of strawberries on her lips.

And their kiss…oh, their kiss. There was nothing more perfect in the history of Bowser's lifetime than that kiss. _She_ had initiated it, _she_ had answered his prayers; tenderly, sweetly, and even lovingly. Like kissing him meant everything to her and answered _her_ prayers as well.

Bowser made a few more happy noises and squirmed in his seat. The pilot rolled his eyes. Once Bowser snapped out of his stupor, he'd be glad that he was 30,000 feet in the air for the hours after that kiss. Just a few seconds of this behavior among the press would be enough for Bowser to lay siege on the media on a global scale. And should he even hint of these feelings to his family, it'd probably be worse.

Time passed. Apparently, the pilot had asked Bowser what he wanted to drink and he had replied a strawberry water, because that was what was in Bowser's hand and, consequently, his mouth. So much for needing extra-strength koopale…all Bowser could think about was Peach, Peach, Peach- and the strawberry water tasted closest to her. Besides, he was already completely smashed with being love-drunk. He didn't need the extra help.

Around the second hour of flight, Bowser had ceased his silence and began…_singing_. "I can't stop this feeeeling," he roared, "deep insiiiide of me!" His deep, gravely and off-key voice was almost comedically wrong for his song choice, but he continued to croon, "Girl, you just don't re-a-lize," He took a swig of strawberry water and continued, gurgling, "what you do to me…" Bowser finally swallowed. "when you hold me in your arms so tight, you let me knooooow," his low note rumbled through the cabin. "Everything's alright!"

Suddenly, Bowser's singing voice got so loud the pilot could hardly hear his radio. "AAAAAAIIII'M!" With a snap, Bowser released himself from the seatbelt and stomped twice, making the small plane shake and lights flash on the pilot's screen. "Hooked on a feelin'!" He stomped around the plane in a big circle, unaware of the pilot's shrieks for him to stop. The poor koopa frantically began pulling levers and flipping switches, ultimately setting the plane in autopilot storm mode, designed for trying times when the pilot couldn't control the plane or the atmosphere and would rather make it out of the storm alive than get going the right direction.

"I'm high on believing'!" Bowser continued bellowing, waving happily as the pilot ran out to the cabin, waving his arms in a much less friendly manner. The koopa king bent down and plucked his pilot of the ground, spinning him around as he rang out, "That you're in love with meeeeeeeeee!"

"SIRE, I demand you put me down!" The pilot shrieked, "And I demand you stop this nonsense! This is a no-dancing plane!"

As if on command, but in reality much more to keep the beat of the song (which he was also shouting out), Bowser chucked the pilot onto a bench along the plane's edge. Dramatically, he threw himself to the ground on one knee, looking at the pilot as if he was Princess Peach. "Lips as sweet as _candy_," he cooed, grabbing at his heart as he continued, "it's taaaste is on my miiiind."

"King Bowser, this is absolutely ridic-"

"Girl, you've got me thirsty for anaathuuur," Bowser dramatically grabbed his glass of strawberry water and stood, raising it high to the plane's ceiling, "Cup of wiiihiiine!" He danced around, punching the air on the supposed beats, with slightly more accuracy than he had at hitting the notes. "Got a bug from you, girl, but I don't neeeeed no cure." He pointed at the koopa, completely ignoring his shrieks, "I just stay afflicted if I can for suuuuuure!" When Bowser turned around to dance some more, shaking his shell and tail inadvertently in the koopa's face, the pilot took his chance. While Bowser sang, "all the good love when we're all aloooone," he prepared to leap at the king. Bowser continued, "keep it up girl. Yeah, you turn me onnnn!"

The pilot yelled as he leapt, even his yell unnoticed as Bowser drowned it out, repeating his deafening "AAAAAAIIII'M!" from earlier. He apparently couldn't even tell the pilot was hanging off his neck, cursing as he eased his scales out of Bowser's spikes. He just continued to roar, "Hooked on a feelin'".

Working as quick as he could, the pilot tore a drape off the closest wall and stuffed it in Bowser's mouth, muffling his singing instantly. The pilot dropped to the ground and kicked Bowser hard in the shin. The king quit singing and looked down at his interrupter, murder in his eyes.

"I'm happy for you, sire, but you've _got_ to stop shaking the plane with your dancing! Sit down and you can do whatever you very well please from a seated position!"

Bowser looked hard at the koopa, quickly lightening up. He plucked the drapery from his mouth and seated himself down on top of the ripped seatbelt. Bowser grinned wide and he continued, "I'm high on believing,".

The koopa groaned all while returning to his cockpit. He could still hear Bowser roar out, "That you're in love with meeee," when he seated himself down and took the plane out of auto-pilot. He looked back once, pleased to see Bowser was now dancing calmly in his seat, choosing to head-bang and sway over stomping the plane's floor.

For once, the pilot wished nothing but misery on King Koopa. At least while they were flying together.

xxxx0o0o0o0o0o0o0xxxx

Princess Peach fiddled with the toilet paper in her hand, now as soft as tissue and shredded to bits. She was hunched over on a toilet in the rest-room, desperately trying to sort herself out. Daisy was right…she _was_ acting over the top. _And what for? Because I kissed Bowser? That was just because he needed a better birthday gift, after everything he'd…_

Her train of thought left the station once she started thinking about that kiss again. It replayed in her mind in all its detailed glory, leaving her with a daft smile and absolutely no better than she was earlier.

The automatic flusher went off again, luckily never splashing up on Peach's dress, but loud enough to shake her from her day-dream. She blinked, realizing how poorly this "sorting-out" was going, and groaned. Why was it that she couldn't focus?

Considering it carefully, Peach decided that kissing _anyone_ on the lips…especially with that awesome of a kiss…would render her useless. She'd never kissed Mario on the lips. At least, not that she could remember. Peach strained to think of a time, her mind constantly returning to the feeling of having her arms around Bowser's neck and her feet in the air. It was, again, a fruitless effort.

Daisy pushed her way into the bathroom, singing, "Hello-o? Peach-y?" as she entered.

Nearly frustrated from being woken from her daydream again, Peach replied, "over here," and kicked the door open.

Daisy came over and leaned against the wall facing the seated Peach. The automatic toilet flushed again before she started talking. "Honestly, I'm glad you're not in here crying."

"Why would I be crying?"

"I don't know- why were you running around hugging everyone when you got off that plane?"

Instead of answering, Peach asked, "Have I ever kissed Mario?"

Daisy opened her mouth, but couldn't immediately think of a time. Surely Peach _had_, but Princess Toadstool was, by far, the shyer of the two, so it was probably away from Daisy's view. "Is that what this is about?" Daisy looked obviously relieved. "Are you acting like this because…you're in love?"

"With Mario?" Peach asked, frightened. Her mind started flying, not necessarily at the concept of loving Mario, but more at the possibility of being in love. Did that feel as crazy as this post-kiss high? Constantly? "Why, do you feel like a million miles an hour all the time because _you're_ in love?"

"Every once in a while," Daisy answered, shrugging. "Not every second…but when I first realized it, when we were first in love, when Luigi does something to make me realize how awesome he is and that he loves me, too…I get a little crazy." She smirked. "The first time _he_ was the one to kiss _me_, the castle guards asked my father for permission to tie me down."

"So…it _is_ connected to kissing, then?"

"What, insanity?" Daisy asked. Peach laughed and nodded. "Sometimes, yeah. Considering these questions you have, I think you're just really excited for our trip…and really ready for a week with Mario."

Peach sighed, "I guess that makes sense." She thought about Grand Canal as romantically as she could. There would be rod-iron banister balconies, overlooking canals and glittering floating trees. The sunsets would paint everything in gold, and it would be there that they would kiss, serenely-singing shy-guys as their only audience.

The only problem was that in Peach's daydream, she wasn't kissing Mario. She was completely entangled in the arms of Bowser.

Daisy was unaware, and grinned at Peach's ridiculously wide grin as she was lost in her own world. She laughed and grabbed her cousin's hand, letting all the torn-up toilet paper fall on the floor from Peach's lap. "Come on, Juliet. Let's go get our Romeos and get some lunch.

She stumbled as she followed Daisy out of the bathroom, laughing a bit to herself and still feeling far giddier than she should. It was only when she saw Mario, eager to have Peach sit by him, that she felt at all guilty. Bowser _wasn't_ going to be at Grand Canal, so she ought to stop daydreaming about him. Get her head out of the clouds and use the vacation for the effective purposes she had intended.

Lunch was delicious, and Har T's pink paradise was just as fresh and succulent as he had hoped. It even took Peach's mind out of the Darklands for awhile, except for those moments when she started to compare it to Cookoopa's cooking…and the food at the Birthday Ball…and the family picnic…and her lunch with Bowser at McGoomba's.

Toadsworth chuckled. "Why, Princess Peach, old gel! Just a few moments ago, you couldn't get your jab to stop up. Now, we can't get a bally word out! Do us all who must stay home and guard the old fort a favor and give us a proper goodbye."

"Sorry, Toadsworth," Peach muttered. "Lost in my own world again, I guess."

"And where would that be?" Har T. asked, grinning. "You haven't told us one little thing about where you've been all week."

"That's cause it's still a secret," she replied, smiling. "A secret of National Security!"

"Nonesense," Har T chuckled. "We're all friends here. Spill the beans!"

Peach shook her head, frantically searching for an answer. How _was_ she going to explain this whole…thing? They could never know she was kidnapped, but she didn't want to make up some ridiculous lie before she knew what was going on. But she didn't want to ruin the chance of utilizing her visit politically, either. Stumbling over her words, she answered, "I…I can't just yet. I was dealing with some highly political matters of…politics and…debauseries and the like. Issues that have yet to be…confirmed ah-and re…conciled with the…board of directors of…politics and debauseries."

"Indeed?" Toadsworth asked, his eyes wide with interest. "I had no idea! And what exactly would 'debauseries' entail, marm? Give us the gen."

"Eh, you know…" she waved her hand, hoping she wasn't sweating through her lie and made-up word. "Politics. Between enemy states that we…are hoping to…_not_ be enemies with. Stuff like that. Very fragile; can't say anything about it." She took a bite and swallowed, buying as much time as possible. "Don't want to disturb the decisions of the board. Especially with…bad publicity."

"So would you mind ever too much if we settled on that description for the newshoppers? They've been bloomin' persistent and curious regarding your absence."

"Uh…yeah. I was…creating friendships with leaders of enemy countries in order to ease the possible future transition to alliance. But the relationship is still fragile and most likely largely unsupported by certain government officials, and as such the country is to remain anonymous." Peach nodded, altogether satisfied with her honesty, as vague as it was.

Toadsworth nodded, jotting notes down on a pad of paper. "I say, quite a shame that 'government officials' need to be getting their potty ideas in the way of progress, don't you gather?"

"It's always that way," Daisy added, shaking her fork, loaded with peach. Watermelon juice flicked off and nearly hit Luigi with her emphasis. "They think they know best for _everyone's_ happiness, but really they just can't get over their _stupid_ _pride_ and realize that friendship and hospitality is more _important_ than ancient prejudices. It's why there's no world peace!"

"Oh, is that why?" one of the quieter toads asked, sarcastically.

"Now, now," Toadsworth spoke up, "Let's not get in a row about politics just now." Indeed, the group chose to talk about the plumbing convention instead. Luigi did most of the talking, as was normally the case with these brothers, and Peach found herself completely incapable of paying attention yet again.

Once lunch was over and the "Now Boarding: Grand Canal" lights flickered on, the group prepared for their final goodbyes.

"Princess Peach," Toadsworth called her over. He motioned for her to bend down, keeping their conversation private. "I…I hope you know what you're doing."

"Toadsworth, it's just a vacation with Mario, Luigi, and Daisy. You were completely on board with this last week; I'll be perfectly fine. I even just spent a week _without_ royally sanctioned protection. There shouldn't be any problems."

"I understand that, Highness, but that's not quite what I meant." He polished the top of his staff, trying to avoid her eyes. "You're…finally growing up." When Toadsworth met her eyes at last, his were almost moist. "You did it; you stayed by yourself, unprotected, for a week without sustaining any harm or even bad publicity. And if I'm to believe you, which I am, you also improved our own country's relations. Not only that, but this holiday…I think you realize how important it is. As you told me just a few weeks ago, this isn't a business trip, or even completely for pleasure. Other road, you two wouldn't have picked his parent's home town. Princess, two weeks ago you were still under our thumbs, incapable of growing one way or another, and Bob's your uncle. But now…when you return, no one will have any reasons to prevent you from any choice you make. For the most part."

Peach gave him a reassuring smile and a hug. "I know, Toadsworth." She put her glove on his wrinkled cheek. "Thank you for letting me grow up."

"And you know, if you ever need to contact me, your right should. Every night."

"Would every other night work? You _did_ just survive a week without a word from me."

"Hardly," he muttered. Toadsworth dramatically sighed, hearing the muffled voices over the airport intercoms. He had to let her onto the plane sooner, rather than later. "Every other night is just brilliant, love. Enjoy your holiday."

"And you to yours!" She stood up and waved goodbye, rushing to grab Daisy's free arm. "Goodbye, Toadsworth! Tell Dad I'm gonna miss him!"

"Right-O, Your Highness. Cheerio."

Daisy gripped Peach's arm, flashing her a grin pulsing with excitement. "I can't _wait_ to get out there. Sunshine, canals, no responsibilities…just us four and our futures! There isn't one person who I'd rather have come."

Peach smiled at Daisy, not completely agreeing. "I'm excited, too." But _excitement_ isn't always full of hope.

* * *

**Author's Note: **So this chapter wasn't quite as perfect as I'd like it, especially since I had to rush through my revisions, but I still think it's a good way to start the next sections. I've been doing research on Vienna and Grand Canal and I am _very _excited to write there...but the most exciting thing is that the next portion of the story is mostly mental.

Thanks again for being so patient and reading this epic-length of a story. It's lovely to hear from all of you and makes writing it even more enjoyable. C:

-Razzi


	44. In the Air

**Foreword:**

this is how lame I am. This chapter is (technically) 10 days late, but also right on schedule as I wanted to post it on Change of Heart's 4th birthday. You would think having 40 days of a buffer would give me enough time to write good, solid chapters and get back on track. But somehow, it wasn't enough. This chapter is undeniably shorter than most, hardly more than half of a normal chapter. However, I wanted to post today, so post I shall. I would like to make up for it by posting a good chapter in the coming updates, but I'm not absolutely certain how that's going to work, as I'm crazy behind in schoolwork.

Anyway, today marks four years of Change of Hearts. Hooooly monkeys. A LOT can happen (and has) in four years, and yet in this story, I just barely finished a week. Sheesh. The dedication you guys put into sticking with this story simply amazes me, and it's so far been a ride I won't ever forget. What a remarkable four years, what an old, dusty story.

Disclaimer before we get into the first chapter in the fifth year- I own nothing of Nintendo's, but I do believe they own part of my soul.

* * *

International First class looked uncomfortably similar to a larger version of Bowser's private jet. When she first saw it, Peach just grinned and flounced around, sitting down in the plush side-couch and imagining Bowser beside her, looking at the doorway that was just like the one in which she kissed him, and even the kitchen where she could see the drink fountains. It was too bad they probably didn't serve flaming bub-ulbs; it'd be nice to taste the closest thing she could get to Bowser's lips for one more time.

But the elation didn't last long. Once Daisy chuckled and told Peach it wasn't free-seating, that she had to sit on the _other_ couch with herself and Mario, she was a lot less bubbly feeling. The plane felt a lot colder, knowing she couldn't be warmed by Bowser's scaly skin.

With an accidentally loud sigh, she got up and moved. As Peach walked over, feeling rather out of it, like she'd been pushed off her high and now had no stomach as she fell, she absent-mindedly crashed into another passenger. "Oh," Peach muttered, "I'm so sorry." She looked up at the woman, now straightening from retrieving her fallen carry-on. The woman was almost the exact same height as Peach, and with her blonde, voluminous hair and sapphire eyes, she could easily pass for a Peach doppelganger.

"That's perfectly fine, I…do I know you?" She blinked, tugging at her fur coat suspiciously.

Peach lit up with amusement. "Perhaps you recognize me from your mirror."

The woman laughed with a deep, but fantastically feminine chuckle. "Per'aps. But I was zinking…haf you heard of 'cause-play', spelled wif an 'ay-ooh'?"

Peach almost chocked on her saliva, literally fearing she'd been found out for a moment. "Umm…actually…yes. Were you in the Peach look-a-like contest?"

She grinned, showing off two sets of stunning teeth. A little jealously, Peach noticed that there were some aspects of this woman that were _too_ pretty to accurately pit her as an identical match. "Vy, yes! Zat must be from where I recognize you! You are veddy good, miss…"

"Um…I…I go by Princess Peach when I'm…in costume." She chuckled, hoping it was believable. Peach's conscience was stirring her up, making her feel sick for her near-lie. Without Bowser by her side, it was much less of a game.

"Of course." She smiled serenely. "I's veddy interesting we are both going to Grand Canal. Is this your last stop, or just von of ze required transfers?"

"Require-?" Peach stopped her question with her sudden realization. _Of course_, she thought_, there had to be _some_ way to keep visitors in and out as secret as possible._ "No, this is my final stop. I'm visiting my…I'm just visiting."

"Did you vin for best look-a-like?"

"No, I was cut early because I don't have a tiara."

"Zat is ridiculous," she scoffed, shaking her head. Other passengers had begun to build up behind the woman in fur, and a few were now clearing their throats and tapping their shoes impatiently. "I fink I am blocking ze line. It 'as been nice seeing you again, 'Princess Peach'. Enjoy Grand Canal!" She waved and left, looking a lot more pleased with her current condition and, likewise, a lot more royal than Peach felt.

"Hey, that was Toadsworth's fake-Peach!" Daisy laughed, grabbing Peach's arm. "Were you apologizing to her?"

"Apologizing?"

"Yeah, Toadsworth sort of led a stampede onto her. I wonder if he ever found out where she was going…imagine the odds!"

"Heh…yeah." Peach didn't say anything else, but just sat down, considering what had just conspired. "Imagine the odds…" How many other people had been to the look-a-like contest? Would anyone remember her as the girl whose 'boyfriend' dressed in drag and made a scene? Or would she always just look like another Peach Doppleganger? And what about her _real_ identity? Who would recognize that? Who _wouldn't_?

"Peach, you look sick," Daisy muttered, putting the back of her hand on her cousin's forehead. "Should I get Mario over here? He's just talking to some fans, I think."

"No, don't do that," she groaned.

Daisy attempted a laugh, and then raised her eye-brow. "He'll have to come over eventually, dear." Peach closed her eyes and nodded. Everything was a little too much for her right now…she had the sinking feeling that her life had just changed without her permission, and she wasn't certain she _wanted_ to get everything back to 'normal', even if she _could_. "Are you gonna tell me what's going on with you, Peach? Where were you last week?"

She sighed, and opened her mouth to answer, but Mario showed up in the doorway to first class just then. He smiled at them both, Peach's mouth still stupidly agape, and sat down by his supposed girlfriend. She quickly shut her mouth and flashed Daisy an apologetic stare.

It was Daisy's turn to sigh, but she nodded in understanding.

Peach looked over at Mario, sitting in similar silence as he looked around. She followed his eyes; they were caught on the food trolley. For a moment, she was jealous his mind could be occupied by such little drama.

"One day," Daisy said quietly, "he'll have to deal with real life, too. It's not just us girls," she consoled, reading Peach's mind with ease. She smiled back at her with gratitude, reading Daisy's face that she was letting her off the hook, but not for long. Suddenly, she realized that she and Daisy's silence was absolutely _nothing_ like Mario's. Theirs said so much more, and she appreciated it _so_ much more.

xxxx0o0o0o0o0o0o0xxxx

The flight to Grand Canal was already several hours long, but as they were flying in accordance with time-zones, the nine hour flight would have them land in the very early morning. Considering they were in the air for nine hours and their watches read a flight almost double that length, the time should have zoomed by. But it was completely the opposite, even for the happiest of passengers.

To Peach, she seemed to feel every minute as if it were five, and no amount of gourmet meals, in-flight movies, or light conversation could keep her from feeling restless. The only time she felt as if time was moving at a normal pace, if not too fast, was once she finally fell asleep.

There, curled up with her feet falling out of her high-heels and her head lolling off of her head-rest, she could finally imagine the first-class cabin as the plane she'd much rather be in. Or as the meadow, where she could have another happy picnic with music, adoring koopalings, and lazy lava rivers. Or as a secret alleyway, where, hidden behind damaged garbage dumpsters, she could be promised love and given finger-kisses. Or as her guest bed, where she could lace her fingers in between those of someone else, someone who would wait for her to wake just to see her eyes open again and shine at his presence.

Her dreams replayed the best parts of her last week over and over again, sometimes in more detail than her own memory seemed to have given, occasionally completely mixing things or adding events that had never actually occurred. More than once, Peach dreamt of playing pickle-ball over an elegant meal while Bowser wore a too-tight Peach dress. And there was that moment when Ludwig pranced in on a dream-stroll, declaring her to be Queen of the Pie Hole before quickly transforming into a golden retriever. Peach was pretty certain that had never happened.

Most likely due to the emotionally and physically draining week, Peach was able to sleep through the entire crossing of the ocean below. But eventually there was enough turbulence that Peach couldn't continue her marathon nap as they flew over the countryside. She jerked awake, noticing that her friends had left her alone on the bench. Daisy and Luigi were sitting by each other at one of the bars, a deck of cards between them. It looked like he was teaching her to count cards. Mario was nowhere to be seen.

Peach yawned politely and stretched, readjusting her mouth to the taste of being awake. Standing up was harder than Peach had imagined and she wobbled over to the bar to get a drink for her morning breath. The shy guy behind the bar looked up at her, cleaning a glass without real purpose. "What'll it be, sleeping beauty?"

"Do you have…do you have any flaming bub-ulbs?" She smiled faintly and hopefully. _Maybe_, Peach thought, _I'll be able to go back to sleep if nobody sees I woke up._

But Peach was to have no such luck. At hearing her voice, Mario suddenly reappeared. "Mama mia, Princess Peach!" he laughed. "They do not-a sell koopa drinks on-a this plane."

"Actually, bub, we do," the bartender laughed. "It's an _international_ company." He turned to Peach with a look of pride. "However, you still need a special license stamp to get the amount of koopale in a flaming bub-ulb."

"Can I just have it virgin then?" Peach asked hopefully.

The shy guy stared at her with what was most likely a bemused expression. "Are you…aware…what normally goes into a flaming bub-ulb, miss?"

She honestly replied, "no," and started to blush. "But could you try and make one anyway?"

He chuckled and turned away to prepare her drink. Mario turned to face her instead. "Did you sleep-a well?" he asked, trying to seem as interested as possible.

"Very," she replied truthfully. "But I think I'm still tired, so I'm just gonna take my drink and try to fall back asleep." Right on cue, the shy guy turned back to Peach with her glass. There were tell-tale fruits at the bottom, but instead of having layers of green, orange, and red, there was just a lot of red and a faint, sparkling orange layer.

"I doubt it'll taste very much like what you're used to," he muttered.

She raised the glass to her lips, opening just enough to taste the super-sweet and strangely bitter blend. She put it down and closed her eyes tightly, trying to match the taste to those of Bowser's lips. It was almost certainly a horrible idea, _but if I can get a firmer grasp on her memories_, she justified, _then I should be able to get over them faster_.

The taste was nothing like Bowser. She realized there was quite a bit missing from the drink itself, but that was absolutely unimportant. Bowser was…smoky, understandably. But mostly, she could just taste _love_ on his lips. She laughed lightly at herself for even thinking that she could have duplicated the experience with a drink.

"How is it?" Mario and the shy guy asked in unison.

"It's…not quite what I remembered. But I'm sure it would be delicious with the right amount of koopale."

The shy guy chuckled. "Trust me, Princess. Koopale is the tamest of ingredients you're missing. How exactly did you taste this particular cocktail the first time?"

She gulped and looked away, messing with her hair. "It was…splashed on my food." She _hated_ lying. But what could she say, with Mario staring her down like that?

"And it was-a so good that you asked-a to have an entire glass?" Mario asked, intrigued.

"No," Peach growled, growing impatient. "I just wanted to remember what it tasted like."

"So you asked-a for an entire gla-"

"_Yes_, Mario, I asked for an entire glass," she seethed. What was it about Mario that had made him _so_ aggravating? Was it just that he was interrupting her quest to remember a person she shouldn't even care to think about in the first place? "Now if you'd excuse me, I need some more sleep."

"You do sound a bit-a tired," he agreed.

Peach restrained herself from turning and lashing out at him, shrinking over to the couch again in steaming silence. She curled into position and shut her eyes, focusing on all her best memories.

But sleep was slow to come. The sounds all around her were loud, brass, and completely unwelcome. She tried to drown them out, but only gave herself a larger headache.

xxxx0o0o0o0o0o0o0xxxx

The humble, nondescript airplane touched down in one of VolcanoPalace's hangars, and Bowser could hardly wait to bound out. He paced in front of the door, demanding loudly that the pilot open it for him so he could hug his children. Bowser grinned toothily at him, adding that he wanted to tell them how much he loved them.

The pilot was happy to oblige and get Bowser off his plane. The table had been uprooted from the spot it was screwed down, the windows were scratched to near oblivion, and the ceiling was now a charred color of black. Not to mention, his entire supply of strawberry syrup had been depleted.

In his uncharacteristic glee, Bowser ran down the plane stairs and saw Kammy walking towards them. He roared in his laughter and ran to greet her. Easily, Bowser lifted the tiny magikoopa and tossed her into the air. "Isn't today _fantastic?_" he shouted, showing off even his deepest-back of molars.

"So I suppose you're not…upset?"

"Upset?" Bowser laughed, whirling her around and hugging her like a tiny doll. "Why in the Darklands would I be _upset_?" Kammy opened her mouth to answer, but Bowser thumped her onto the ground too quickly, knocking her reply, and all her breath, right out of her. "Can you keep a secret?" he asked, eyes wide as saucers.

"Do I have much of a choice?" she asked, amused.

"Good!" Bowser lifted her up again, bringing the side of her head right to his mouth. "Princess Peach _kissed_ me!" This time, it was Kammy's eyes that went wide. Soon, she was choking again as Bowser gave her a second strangling hug and laughed triumphantly. "Me! Right on the MOUTH!"

"You realize she's _gone_ now, right, sire?" Kammy asked nervously.

"Really gone," Bowser agreed loudly, "but never missing!" He laughed and spun around, then stopped in his tracks. "Or is it supposed to be the other way around?" He shrugged and literally tossed Kammy away, apparently forgetting she was a living being and not a plane seat. "It doesn't matter! She KISSED me!"

He laughed again, rushing down the hallway and singing nonsensical words at the top of his off-key voice.

He had turned down two hallways, curious heads poking out of doors and around corners in his wake. Wendy rushed out to the hallway to meet him, panting. "I…like…felt a total urge to…like…be here. What's…going on?"

"Wendy!" He bellowed, picking up his only daughter and spinning her around. "I have _so much_ to tell you!" He set her down and, very seriously and in a low-voice, asked, "What do you do when your soul mate kisses you?"

Wendy's eyes went wide, and she squeezed her father's hands, shrieking as she bounced up and down. "You call an emergency sleep-over!" She let go of one of his hands and pulled him down the hallway. "I'll call all my friends! You call all of yours!"

"I don't have any!" Bowser shouted in just as excited of a voice. "They're all my employees or prisoners of war!"

"Then we'll, like, call Mama Peach's friends that she made while she was, like, here." She continued to run, Koopa King in tow, until she got to the kitchen and pounded on the door.

"Hunny, what'chu want now?" Cookoopa called from through the door. She swung it open and stared down at Wendy, unable to keep her scowl long as she met her glowing eyes. "What's goin-"

"I need to, like, make an announcement to the kitchen staff."

"Are we throwin' a party?"

"Yep," she agreed, pushing the elderly koopa aside to stand in the kitchen. She continued in a bellow, "a _slumber_ party! Daddy has drama!"

Dozens of girly screams echoed off the pots and pans as goombas, koopas, and boos skated to surround Wendy. Bowser couldn't understand any of their high-pitched blathering, and found it odd that, except for countless glances over at him, they refused to confront the King about the drama himself. That is, except for Cookoopa, who hadn't rushed to jump up and down with Wendy.

"So what's so exciting, your majesty?" she asked, elbowing him in the side.

"It's a secret," Bowser grinned.

"Really?" Cookoopa asked, raising an elbow far up. "Because it ain't gonna be a secret long."

He smirked, but his eyes were dancing. "I'll tell you tomorrow. I don't want these people to overhear yet."

"Come on, dad!" Wendy laughed, running out the door with almost the entire kitchen staff in tow. "We have to tell my friends about the sleepover!"

"Wait," Bowser growled, snapping out of his love-drunk attitude into paternal mode for a moment, "these aren't all of them?"

The girls all laughed, and Wendy shook her head. "Dad, you are _so_, like, out of the loop."

"But don't worry, sire," one cheeky goomba piqued, "we'll cure you alright!"

Wendy rushed up to her dad, grabbing his hands and squealing. "I'm _so happy_ for you, Daddy! This is, like, going to be totally the best sleepover ever!"

Bowser felt his stomach turn a bit, remembering exactly the kiss that spurred all this forthcoming excitement. Butterflies raced through his entire body, and his face lit up to a goofy smile again. "Yeah, Wendy," he agreed, "it totally is…"

* * *

**Author's Note: **Happy Birthday, Change of Heart. :) I apologize both to the nature of this fic and to you readers that we had to celebrate with such a short, unedited chapter. I may have promised some of you that the "exciting/scary story elements" were in this chapter, but since I've left off 3-4 pages of usual length, it's not here yet. So that's what we have to look forward to- the unknown.

My deepest appreciation again for sticking with me, either these past four years or just more recently, being aware its taken so long. It's you guys, just as much as Bowser and Peach, that are making this ride so worthwhile.

-Razzi


	45. Feet on the Ground

**Foreword: **Goodness gracious, I don't think anyone realizes how terrible I honestly feel about that hiatus. Hopefully, no one thought I had died or quit the story before its conclusion. I intend on doing neither thing. You must realize that every spare moment I had I spent on this chapter. Which just goes to show how little spare time I've had!

I wanted to make it up to you by giving a nice, good chapter, but since we're in a weird part of the story, I don't know how techincally _good_ the chapter ended up being. It's definately _long_, though, so...yay?

Disclaimers: First of all, I am in no way affliated with Nintendo and don't own anything in this chapter. However, I owe them a part of my life. Second of all, I am in no way Italian and am doing my best to not butcher the language. If anyone fluent in Italian wants to be awesome and help me get my phrases linguistically correct in the upcoming chapters better than babel fish and Italian phrase websites can, I will also owe _you_ a part of my life and be eternally grateful. In the mean time, please excuse any mistakes I may make.

* * *

"Mama Peach!" Bowser junior called, sprinting across the runway to her. Peach's plane had landed, and somehow the pilot had gotten completely turned around. Far from Grand Canal, they had landed in the Darklands, right in front of the youngest koopaling.

She grinned wide, realizing how much she missed such appreciation. "Junior! What are you doing out here?"

He leapt into her arms and squeezed around her neck while answering, "We saw your plane and came to see if it was really you!"

"We?" Peach asked. Suddenly, she became aware that the other seven koopalings were squirming around her, excitedly jabbering between each other.

"Peach, are you going to introduce us?" Daisy asked, laughing as Lemmy stared in confusion at Daisy's presence.

"Oh, of course! Mario, Luigi, Daisy; this is Larry, Lemmy, Roy, Wendy, Ludwig, Morton jr, Iggy, and Bowser Junior."

"We've-a…_met_," Mario muttered.

Luigi glanced nervously at the koopalings, but Roy quickly laughed, "Ah, we ain't gonna fight ya. Not in front of the dolls, at least, eh boys?" The other koopalings grunted agreements.

"You just keep your gloves of my Mama, fatman!" Junior snarled from Peach's arms.

She laughed and tapped his muzzle. "Junior, that is _no_ way to talk to Uncle Mario."

Somewhere in the distance, a fanfare signified the opening of giant oaken doors Peach had never before noticed. The plane had apparently flown off, too, as the group was definitely inside a grand hall, not on the runway. Dramatically flanked by koopas and goombas, Bowser strode out from the doors and approached them. He seemed taller and even more fit than Peach remembered. And when he saw her, he flashed a smile that made her head spin from across the room.

It took maybe two seconds for him to suddenly be directly in front of Peach and her friends. The koopalings were all gone by now, except for Lemmy, who was holding Luigi's hand, Junior, who was circling Mario like a hungry cheep-cheep, and Iggy, who was staring up at Daisy in total adoration.

"You came back soon," he murmured.

"Nothing could keep me away from you," she replied, taking his hands.

"I'm glad you brought your friends. Is Daisy going to be the maid-of-honor?"

"Of course!" Peach answered, rolling in Bowser's grasp to face her friends. His arms held her securely around the waist. "And I'd like Mario to be one of your groomsmen, if that's okay."

"Anything for my future queen," Bowser purred. He kissed the top of her head. Then they were alone. She turned and looked deeply into his eyes, seeing her entire future in those dark pupils. "We're here, Peach," he said.

"I know. It's all seemed to happen so fast, but we're finally here!"

"Let's go; we're here," he repeated.

"We have to wait for the florist to arrive, Bowser," she laughed.

"Come on, Peach, get up. It's time to get off the plane."

"What?"

"Let's go, Peach," Bowser repeated in Daisy's voice, nudging her until everything came into focus and it was Daisy looking down at her, not the Koopa King. "Sleep well?"

She blinked slowly, sitting up. At least her migraine was gone. "I had one of those weird dreams. The kind that _feels_ like a good dream, but when you wake up, it totally should have been a nightmare."

"Like when Luigi dreamt he was being crushed alive by jelly-beans?" Daisy asked. "That was how he got the courage to try all the flavors. Now they're practically his favorite food!"

Peach chuckled. "Not exactly the same, but sorta, yeah. Let's, um…find Mario and Luigi."

"They're already off the plane, actually," Daisy said as she led Peach towards the cabin door. "You should see how excited they are to be here."

And seeing how excited they were turned out to be exactly what Peach needed. Mario was literally rolling on the balls of his feet while he waited for the princesses with his brother. Luigi was, surprisingly, the one drooling over all the authentic Italianesque food around them in the airport. The look on Mario's face was one of her favorites; he knew what he wanted, and it wasn't out of hatred towards Bowser or desire to be victorious- it was completely out of childlike glee.

They laughed the entire way to baggage claim, Mario and Luigi excitedly reading the things written in Italian and translating them for Daisy and Peach. The entire time, Peach only learned two new phrases- "il bagno", the most reoccurring sign that signified the bathroom on nearly every corner, and "sbrigati!", Mario's new favorite word, stemmed from his impatience.

A paunchy shy-guy was waiting for them at the luggage carousels, holding a sign that read "Gruppo di Mario". They walked over to him, smiling and waving. Mario thrust his gloved hand out towards the shy guy, saying, "That is-a us! 'Gruppo di Mario' is here!"

"Parlo soltanto Italiano," the shy guy answered, with what was almost certainly a sneer under his mask.

"Oh, mi scusi," he apologized. "_Siamo_ Gruppo di Mario." He gestured at the "M" on his hat, and the shy guy gruffly nodded. He began to babble in Italian far faster than either princess could dare to try and keep up with. Mario and Luigi listened intently, nodding every now and again in understanding. Occasionally they would laugh or add a comment. By the end of their short conversation, the shy guy seemed much happier and completely convinced of their identities.

He walked over to the carousel with them, talking with the Mario brothers so quickly that Peach almost missed words she knew, like "Mushroom Kingdom", "Peach", "Daisy", and "Bowser". Although she caught the last one immediately. The group waited patiently to grab their bags; as Peach has seven, Daisy had five, and Mario and Luigi had each checked one, the wait was fairly long and involved. It seemed like a fourth of the plane's luggage was theirs.

The paunchy shy guy wheeled over a cart and directed [[follow me]], leading them out to the outermost doors of the airport. When the doors automatically swung out, Peach couldn't suppress her gasp. Even just this airport view of Grand Canal was absolutely stunning. The patio connected to the airport seemed to double as a dock, dozens of grand waterbuses, gondolas, and even yachts bobbing in the wide expanse of water. It narrowed on either side to become the famous canals of the city, separating them from the small parking lot connected by bridge. It seemed the lot pointed only _away_ from the city.

Just a few meters down from the widened portion of canal, the city rose up like a bed of daisies. The buildings were old, but colorful, and stood out against the bright blue waters. Some were decorated in foreign writing (not all of which was obviously Italian), others in English, and a very few more looked like residences. Beautiful golden cobblestone walkways separated the storefronts from the water, and there were gondolas pulled up in front of most of them, parked like cars at a parking meter.

"La mia è qui," the shy guy said, directing his group comment at Mario and Luigi. He seemed happiest when he ignored Peach and Daisy's existence, so they kept quiet. They headed down the side of the water to something that seemed a cross between a yacht and a gondola, stretched to seemingly impractical lengths. It quickly became obvious that this was the Grand Canal equivalent of a limousine. He heaved their luggage onto the boat, moving the load of fourteen bags into a covered compartment, and then helped them each get from the dock to the boat.

"Does he know where to go, Luigi?" Daisy asked quietly, as if hoping her English wouldn't be heard and get her kicked off the very nice boat.

"Um…speaking of that," Peach interrupted, "Where _are_ we going?"

"First to our-a hotel, then to our parent's-a house," Mario explained. "Conoscente dove andare, si?" he called to the shy guy now acting as chauffeur, making absolutely certain.

"Si, signore," he answered. Mario nodded at Peach, reaffirming the answer. He had an odd look of pride about him. She decided it must be the feeling of home…all four of them were constantly looking out at the scenery, especially as the boat began its graceful glide through the water. But while Daisy and Peach were looking over the architecture and scenic views like tourists, Mario and Luigi looked like they were searching for a connection within the city that already existed within themselves.

When the ride was finished gliding through the canals, keeping to the right to not hit any other boats, passing through streams of bouncy music and tempting aromas, the group couldn't wait to get into their hotel. Not only was jet-lag catching up with most of them, but the hotel looked like something straight out of a postcard. The white marble façade glittered, reflecting with the colors around it, and the carved-open windows were all decorated with window boxes and fluttering curtains.

And yet, the outside was a mere humble shell, compared to the ornate golden, marble, and tapestry adorned main lobby. The stone floor, glittering with its elaborate floral patterns, ran right up to the stunning arches that surrounded them. By the grand staircase, fountain statues of chubby baby shy-guys seemed to herald their entry. And on either side, great golden cage elevators hummed up and down through the wide-open lobby atrium, moving towards the crystal chandelier and the beautiful, tinkling music that came from the light fixture itself.

The chauffeur shy guy helped their bags out and heralded the help of an eager bell-guy. Mario paid the chauffeur, bid him "Grazi", and directed his leading opinion towards the bell-guy, struggling underneath Peach's largest pink suitcase, filled, as she remembered, with her new elegant ballgown. "Here," she breathed, rushing over to stop the bag from crashing down, "let me help you."

"Oh, thank you, signorita!" he replied. Together, they laid the bag on the third of the filled carts for the group. "That was the last of them. Do you know which room is yours yet?" His accent held no trace of his citizenship at all, and if she hadn't heard him talking with the chauffeur, Peach may not have even believed he belonged in the same country.

"No, I think my…um…friend…is checking in right now. We're getting two rooms." She looked over at the desk, where Mario was, indeed, trading golden coins for two silver keys. The shy guy behind the desk with an enormous moustache, oddly enough located outside his mask, nodded graciously at him. Peach waited for him to come over, then smiled brightly and asked, "Do we have good rooms?"

Mario nodded simply, smiling wide. Luigi took the keys from him, inspecting the numbers scrawled into the metal, and added, "Not quite the best-a they have, but better than any room you have ever-a seen!"

"So which is ours, Lu?" Daisy asked, putting an arm around his waist and looking down at the keys.

"Wait, what?" Peach barked. "Are we splitting up by…couples?" The word felt odd and forced on her tongue, but made a horrible lot of sense. "Are Mario and I sharing the other room?"

"Well, how did you _think_ we would split it?" Daisy asked. "We're here on…a couples retreat."

"No," Peach muttered, "You weren't even coming, originally!"

"Neither was I," Luigi interjected, staring her down. "It _was-a_ just you and-a Mario. You have-a had this reservation for a _long_ time. It was-a very kind of the manager to allow it to be changed to this-a week."

"And because we're out of tourist season," the bell guy added. The group glared at him for eavesdropping, and he quickly straightened out, adding, "I'll just wheel these to the hallway then! Tell me which room is which when you get up there, I guess!" He took off towards the service elevator, tripping over himself to get away from the angry guests.

"But Luigi," Peach began pointedly. The bellboy's faux pas had given her ample time to think. "You _just_ said we've had this reservation for a long time. Yeah, I always planned on going with Mario as a couple," the word was still awkward on her tongue, "but we _never_ planned on rooming together. When you two joined, we just added you to our already separate bedrooms. It's more of a dramatic change to put the couples _together_." She dared to glance at Daisy, scanning her face to see if her cousin would help her. But from the pout on Daisy's face, she was _not_ pleased to be on the losing side of the argument.

Mario looked from Luigi to Daisy, his expression giving away his confusion more than disappointment. But overall, he seemed to not mind rooming with his brother for yet another week. "As long as I get-a to pick the bed first-a."

Daisy sighed dramatically, letting go of Luigi and snatching one of the silver keys. "Alright, Peach. Let's go find our room." She grabbed her cousin's arm and went off in a huff, pulling her far enough ahead of the brothers that they wouldn't hear. "Look, I love you and all, but I really-"

"I'm sorry I'm spoiling your romantic week," Peach interrupted.

"That's not my biggest problem," Daisy told her, under her breath. "Luigi and I have a _long _time to come back and visit his family. I'm sure we'll have our fair share of sharing a room, too. I'm just upset that you're obviously not keen on spending a _romantic_ week with Mario, and here I am, thinking you wanted him to propose this week!"

Peach stayed silent as they continued their forward march, entering an empty cage elevator and waiting for the brothers to join them. Finally, just before they entered, she spoke. "I'm sorry. I don't even know for myself yet."

"Know what?" Luigi asked. Mario selected the seventh floor, and with a charming ding, the elevator doors closed.

"What to do this week," Daisy lied easily. "Do we have many plans at all?"

"Well, I would-a like to nap," Mario admitted. "That-a plane ride wore-a me out." The rest of the group, except for Peach, muttered in agreement. She'd gotten enough sleep _on_ the plane, but admittedly, dreaming did sound wonderful at the moment.

Finding their rooms on the seventh floor was not difficult. The bell-guy, surrounded by carts, was situated in front of two red doors, waiting patiently. "Have you decided?" He asked.

Daisy opened the leftmost door and peered inside. "Ooh!" She called, adoring the high ceiling and large, expansive room. It was almost as ornate inside as it was in the lobby, and curling gold seemed to trace every piece of furniture and every corner of the walls. "Peach and I are taking this one. So all the pink and yellow bags can come in here."

Obediently, the bell guy rolled the trolleys through the door and into the expanse of room. Lightly, he plucked Mario and Luigi's combined bags off the top of the most empty trolley, carried them to the brothers' room, and returned to help unload the ridiculous amount of luggage Peach and Daisy had brought.

After he was through and they had given him his generous tip, the boys excused themselves to take a nap. Peach moved to open one of her suitcases, intending on unpacking enough to make sense of her wardrobe, when Daisy grabbed her hand. "Hold up, Peach; you've got some 'splaining to do." She sat down on one of the beds, sinking into the down mattress with gleeful surprise. Slowly, Daisy let herself fall back onto the bed, and sighed dramatically. "Ohh…hoho…" she chuckled in complete adoration. "But storytime can wait." Daisy curled up over the covers, closing her eyes and breathing deeply.

Peach chuckled and turned back to her bag. "At least until I have an excuse," she quietly agreed.

xxxx0o0o0o0o0o0o0xxxx

An elegant toad approached King Toadstool, reclining in a chair by a castle window. "Good Afternoon, sire. I have excellent news of your daughter's whereabouts."

"Do you?" He spun around to face his subject, a smile on his face. "More news? This is certainly a more pleasant situation than we were in yesterday."

"Yes, well, they've landed and have checked in to the hotel. Rooms 714 and 716, as previously planned, with the princesses in 714. Everything seems to be in order, everyone seems to be safe."

"And has she disclosed her previous location?"

"Not that our eyes and ears know of. Her friends also seem unaware."

The king bit the inside of his cheek and looked out the window again. Birds were chasing each other, near one of the castle's fountains. "But at least we know she's safe. She'll tell us in good time, I'm sure of it." He chuckled. "I think my doctor is going to be pleased most of all. My blood-pressure has been through the roof this past week."

"Excuse me for my assumptions, but I thought you seemed so calm about the situation, sire."

"That's my job, sir. Keep a steady face. Kings in our kingdom do little more than give the country a physical representation. If I expressed how I truly felt all the time, the entire kingdom would feel the repercussions that the emotions of a father can have. I need to remain calm, at least on the outside, lest there be serious problems among the people and media."

"That's very noble of you, but can't be good for your health…"

"It's not," he agreed. Slowly, the king stood up and gripped his wrist. He remained silent, facing away from the messenger toad, until he muttered, "Thank you very much for the good news. You're excused, sir. And would you please bring in Toadsworth?"

The toad bowed low and left the Toadstool king alone, musing by the light of the garden. Soon, Toadsworth entered the room, hobbling quickly over to the king.

"'Ello, siah. I do believe you had something to tell me, eh? What seems to be the bother?"

"I'm going to arrange for a bouquet of fresh, Mushroom Kingdom flowers to be sent to my daughter's hotel room with my well-wishes. Would you like a small note of your own to be included?"

"That would be jolly good, siah, if we knew her whereabouts."

"We do, Toadsworth," the king replied. He ignored his aid's pale-white face and continued, "she's in room 714 of the Hotel Ca' Shygredo."

"And _why_ don't I know about this, your majesty?"

"Perhaps," he explained with a bemused expression, "Because she is _my_ daughter, and not yours. I truly appreciate all your efforts in keeping a close eye on her, but you _must_ begin to relax, good man."

"It would be indefinitely easier to relax if I knew where the little poppet was resting her rump."

"Among friends, Toadsworth, among friends."

"And what of her last week? Where was she?"

"Wherever she was," he offered, "managed to get her back to her friends right on time and in perfect condition and _without_ bragging to the media. Therefore, I hold wherever she was in the greatest of esteem and, when Princess Peach discloses that location, I will personally thank their dignitaries for the respect she was given in her wishes of privacy."

"But…but shouldn't they have bloomin' _told-_"

"Peach could not enter a country unnoticed. And if she requested privacy, that would include from her own people, as it's near impossible to differentiate between good spies and bad spies, if they're really talented spies. The _greatest_ of esteem, Toadsworth." He tried to mask the persistent questions in his mind, and sat back down in his worn-in chair. "Now, when can I expect that note?"

xxxx0o0o0o0o0o0o0xxxx

Wendy seemed to be in more control of the evening's activities than Bowser, as she led her parade of female attendants down the hallways, giggling and gossiping with Bowser beginning to feel rather out of place, scurrying to keep up in the center.

With a loud _bang_ and a whirl of blue smoke, Kamek appeared in the corridor's middle, scattering the girls as they screamed to avoid running into him. He looked at them somberly, finding Bowser's eye and narrowing his view. "Your majesty, may I have a word?"

"I'm kind of…in the middle of something," Bowser grinned, and all the girls continued to squirm and run into each other around his center.

"Are you aware you're _supposed_ to be in the middle of something different?" Kamek asked, his tongue hot with impatience.

"Ummm…" Bowser paused, looking into his skull for a long-forgotten schedule. "Frankly, I'm not actually _aware_ of much right now."

Kamek sighed and, with a brush of his wand, parted the sea of girls. He stepped over to Bowser as they thumped against the invisible barrier and took his claw. "You have twelve rescheduled meetings, seven that were cancelled and need to be discussed, and seventeen that you just skipped completely in the past week. We have serious damage control to do, and you don't really have time for-"

"Bonding with my only daughter?" Bowser asked, strategically.

Kamek sighed, and pulled him completely out of the circle, letting the girls reform their mob away from Bowser. "Look, sire," he started, much quieter. "Kammy told me about your good news, and I understand that you won't be…productive…at any meetings. And I also understand the need for you to discuss matters with your friends. In this case, your daughter. But sire, the media and government officials are all ready muttering about you being an 'inefficient head-of-state', 'over distracted', and 'stunted by emotions'. If they find out you're rescheduling your rescheduled meetings because you can't think straight-"

"And yet people are okay with all the abandoning of responsibility I go through to have some fun terrorizing other countries and kidnapping Peach?"

"That's easier to justify," Kamek explained, chuckling a bit. For being so love-drunk, Bowser had a clearer head about some things than normal. "Throw in phrases like 'expanding borders', 'handling alliance issues', and 'asserting authority' and the public eats it up."

"Then tell them I'm handling mental health and bonding with my daughter. They love sappy things like that."

"Oh, we're not appeasing the public, sire. We're appeasing the same crowd that mans your excursions into enemy territory. The first meeting you have is with the head of the bob-omb division of the army."

Bowser snarled. Slowly, he muttered, "how late do they go tonight?"

Kamek bubbled with pleasure that Bowser was apparently giving in. "They're scheduled until 11:30, but if you work _efficiently_, you should be done by 9:30; 10 at the latest."

He groaned. Working efficiently seemed very unlikely, but staying in meetings until 11:30 seemed even worse. He turned to Wendy. "Hey little-miss-Ugly!"

Wendy spun on her heels and put her hands on her hips. "What did you call me, Dad? You expect me to throw you a party with that kind of respect?"

"Yeah I do. And it can't start until 9:30. Because I don't want to see your ugly face in the sunlight at _all_."

"Well that's just fine," she sneered, "Because if my friends saw yours, they'd all stop talking to me for being _related_!"

"Because they're disappointed you got your looks from your mother's side of the family, I know. It's just a life-struggle for you, I guess. But every Quasikoopo has their Esmeralda. You'll find yours, someday."

"At least they're easier to find than blind women with no sense of smell, hearing, or taste in men!"

"Actually, princess," Bowser continued, his eyes a little lighter, "I've already found _my_ true love. And she doesn't think I'm bad at all."

Wendy's mob of friends began to giggle again, and Kamek grabbed Bowser's arm. "As endearing as this is, you've got to get going. Sergeant General Commander Bobbison doesn't like to be kept waiting."

"Sergeant General Commander? Who gave him _that_ title?"

"You did, sire," Kamek explained.

"Oh," Bowser's eyes popped open. Sternly, he nodded. "That's why it's so_ good_."

As they headed off, Wendy piped up in a lot less of a sarcastic voice, "I'll order pizza, Daddy!"

"Why does she order pizza if there's a full-service kitchen staff invited to her party?" Kamek asked as they began down the hall.

"The pizza-koopa from a few streets down is apparently 'really cute' or something useless like that," Bowser explained. "And she thinks it would be tacky to get him a job in the Palace."

"Well, good luck to her on that," Kamek chuckled. "And good luck to you with Bobbison. Remember, you're supposed to be discussing a pay-rise, due to the low return rate of the bob-omb soldiers, as well as added benefits for purple-heart families."

"They're living bombs," Bowser growled. "You'd think they'd _know_ things might get a little explosive. Low return rate my tail."

"Yes, well, you discuss that with the Sergeant General Commander. Conference Room C17, fourth floor in the third quadrant."

"I _never_ have meetings that far! Might as well be meeting him in Snowman Land."

"I know, sire, but Bobbison is getting on in age, and he's a little…sensitive to the heat from the Palace's core."

"_I'm_ the king, shouldn't the location revolve around _me_?"

"If you don't mind having your host explode on you, I suppose that would make more respectful sense. However, since I believe you will find it easier in the long run to appease him, if alive and pleased with your 'respect' towards his wishes."

"It'd be easier in the long run if he was blown up anyway," Bowser grumbled.

Kamek looked at him, raising an eyebrow. Bowser rolled his eyes to emphasize that he did honestly understand the situation. With a curt nod, Kamek continued, "I've drawn up a schedule for you." On cue, he rolled a scroll out from his wand. "All your meetings are in locations that align with each other or are held in the same conference room, and you'll end up on the same floor as Wendy's personal gathering room."

Bowser took the schedule and read his extensive list under his breath. "These all look really boring."

"Then try and finish them before it's too late, sire. It'll make everything a lot more entertaining for everyone."

"Could you at least transport me to the room?"

Kamek sighed, "you _know_ teleportation magic is unnecessary in the Palace, and when teleporting others, an extreme waste of my own supply as well as the Palace's, Sire."

"I'm a thirty minute walk away. The koopacars can't get through the hallways on the fourth floor, and maintenance closed all the diagonal elevators three years ago."

"What about the escalators?" Bowser snorted smoke out his nostrils, glaring at Kamek with even more heat in his eyes. "Okay, okay!" the magikoopa appeased, putting his wrinkled hands up to block Bowser's gaze. "But don't expect me to make a habit out of it."

"Kammy never complains like this, toady."

Without a proper response, Kamek conjured a blue cloud of smoke around his King's body, and with a _bang_ similar to the one that scattered the group of girls, the hallway was empty.

Well, nearly. Kammy had been watching around the corner, and she sauntered over to Kamek with a twinkle in her eye. "What do I not complain about?"

"Wasting magic on Bowser's pointless whims," he answered.

She looped her arm through his and rolled her eyes. "That's just because I was trying to get on his good side. Don't really need to anymore."

"Because you have me?" Kamek supplied, grinning at her mischievously.

"Not quite. None of your sides are any good." Her eyes twinkled. "So now I have to spend my efforts trying to make you presentable to have on my arm."

"Lady, it would take a lot more than your own efforts to make me ugly enough to resemble any of the warts already on your arm."

"I don't have any warts on my arm, except you!" She snapped. "My warts are all…elsewhere." Kamek flashed a knowing grin at her. Moving on, she said, "How was Lord Bowser, anyway?"

"Aww, we're not going to discuss your countless physical imperfections?"

"Not in present company," she snarled, pointing her wand at a tapestry. It sounded a faint _pop_, and several boos zoomed away, cackling at their mischief. "You too, pipsqueaks." Dramatically, two twin mousers threw back the tapestry and marched off.

Kamek rolled his eyes. Surely their new form of relationship had become less than hot-topic, but then again, the castle was still buzzing about Roy's brief relationship with that Birdo model from months before. "Bowser was better than I expected."

"Really?" She asked in disbelief. "I told you he almost broke my ribs in his merriment, didn't I?"

"Like I'd believe an old hag like you," Kamek retorted. "The love of his life just left for a romantic getaway with her supposed boyfriend. Surely that would have sunken in by now."

"Not when you're in as deep as Bowser," she said, dreamily. "He's so used to being hardcore all the time that I'm not surprised he's finding things to be upset about. But I'm positive that if he thinks of Peach, all he'll be able to think of right now is joy.

"He's waited his _whole life_ for her to kiss him. And his _whole life_ he's had her literally torn from his claws and willingly go off with her 'supposed boyfriend', as you call him. This is therefore better than normal. It's the same set-up, with a few major differences. One- she actually told him she didn't want to leave. And two- _she_ expressed romantic interest in _him_."

Kamek was quiet for a bit, before asking in a high-pitched voice, "How do you _know_ all this?"

"I got very good at figuring Lord Bowser out and knowing things about him I probably shouldn't. It hasn't turned off quite yet."

He chuckled. "Are you going to get all stalker and omnipotent about me, now?"

"Good Koopa, I hope not. I can hardly stand to see you when I have to," she said with a disgusted face.

"The feeling's mutual, freakazoid." They rounded a corner into a vacant office and, after Kammy confirmed it was _completely_ vacant, the door slammed shut.

* * *

**Author's Note: **So I was just going through previous A/N's and realized a little while ago I said I was doing research on Vienna. In case you haven't noticed and for some reason still remember, Grand Canal is _not_ related to Vienna at all. It's related to Venice. So sorry about that little accident. And speaking of such, for those of you interested, the Ca' Shygredo is inspired by the Ca' Sagredo, a freakishly beautiful five-star hotel in VENICE. Not Vienna.

And again, I would like to apologize for this disgusing hiatus. Yesterday was my last day of high school, and as I don't have any summer classes or homework this year, I should have plenty of time to write and post updates on TIME. So thank you very, very much the few of you who haven't abandoned us yet. There's plenty to come. :)

-Razzi


	46. Explanation, Again?

**Foreword: **We're not discussing how this ended up being tragically late again. That's too depressing for me. I equate it to not wanting to finish.

This chapter features the lovely Mama and Papa Mario, and even though all anyone knows of them is that they have great taste in shoes from Yoshi's Island, I LOVE writing them. But, like everything else in this story, I don't own them.

* * *

Waking up in a vaguely unfamiliar room was always more pleasant of an experience for Daisy than Peach. The room around her, blurring into view, was just as ornate and golden as she was beginning to remember, especially with the Grand Canal sunset coming in through the window. She turned her head out the window and saw Peach's silhouette framed against the rose and golden light. She was out on the balcony, leaning over the canals below, and had apparently been very busy while Daisy napped.

Daisy climbed off the bed, both the sheets and her dress considerably more wrinkled than they were a few hours ago. She ran her fingers through her hair, fixing the tangles with one hand and adjusting her dress with the other. Then she began a quick walk around the room. Peach's bags, all of them, were empty. That seemed rather overkill to unpack, seeing as she wouldn't be needing at least half the clothing, but her bags looked charming stacked and sitting in the corner.

After opening the glass sliding door, Daisy joined Peach outside. "I see you made yourself at home."

"I didn't unpack any of your things. If I'm remembering correctly, you like to just work out of your bag anyway."

Daisy nodded. "It makes packing up to go home _so much_ easier."

"How was your nap?" Peach asked, changing the subject.

"_Fantastic_," she sighed. "You have _got_ to try these beds out."

Peach laughed. "I will, don't worry."

"If you don't mind me asking…why did you unpack_ all_ your things?"

"Because last week, all my things were unpacked. The attendants took care of it for me, and I felt so…at home there. I think that attributed a lot to that."

"So you wanted to feel just as at home here?"

"If possible," she muttered, "that would be ideal."

"Speaking of which," Daisy began with a clever grin, leaning on the banister, "where was this _home_ from last week?"

"Um…you sure we don't need to…uh…go to dinner right now?"

"Not yet, Peachy. Luigi said he'd come get us when it was time to go."

"When did he say that?"

"It doesn't matter; stop trying to change the subject. Where _were_ you? Come on, Peachy, you can trust me!"

"Can I?" She asked quietly.

"Now that's hurtful," Daisy asked with a fake sob. "Seriously, Peach. You know you can tell me anything."

Peach had been bursting to tell anyone…absolutely _anyone_ what she had been doing the past week. She wanted to relive every single detail out loud, just to remind herself that it was real, that it had been enjoyable, and that it wasn't just some weird dream. She wasn't so sure she wanted anyone's opinion on it, seeing as they would all tell her that she should stay far, far away from Bowser and everything connected to him, or that she was crazy for thinking he was charming in the least. She had almost called up the chauffeur, since he _couldn't_ talk back.

But now that Daisy was here, begging for the truth, Peach didn't care so much about the negative opinion part. She just wanted to tell the world that she had been with Bowser, considered him a friend, and wanted to be back there with him and his family right at that moment.

She especially wanted to yell and scream about their kiss.

"You have to promise you won't tell a soul."

"You're actually going to tell me?"

"Not Luigi, _especially_ not Mario, not Toadsworth …oohhhh if you tell Toadsworth, you're dead, I swear… not-"

"Peach, I get it. I won't even tell my stuffed Goomba. Let's go inside so no one hears you out here."

"Good idea!"

"Are you also going to tell me why you were so crazy at the airport?"

"Baby steps, Daisy," Peach laughed. They went inside, with Peach locking the door behind them. She shut the blinds, closed the curtains, ran to the door and peered through the peephole, tapped on all the mirrors, and ran a hand over all the picture frames. The procedure took her a well-practiced 45 seconds, but that was enough for Daisy to laugh whole-heartedly at her paranoia.

"I guess this is a really good dish then?"

"It would take you _years_ to understand." She motioned to the uncomfortable looking (but surprisingly soft) sofa, and the cousins sat down. Peach took a deep breath and looked squarely at Daisy. "I need to you believe me when I say that I was _very _happy and _very_ in control of my situation the past week. I was in no way desirous to be rescued or leave my locale…at least not after the first few days."

Daisy had so many questions already, mostly from the crazy look in Peach's eyes. But she kept silent and let her continue with the disclaimer.

"I left the castle last week with the intention to go on a secret vacation away from the knowledge of anyone at home. However, I did not have an intended location. I completely planned on showing up at the airport and buying tickets for whichever exotic arrival airport I was most conveniently timed for. However, my plans were thwarted and…my taxi cab…Daisy, you can't tell _anyone_ _any _of this."

When Peach didn't continue, Daisy crossed her heart. "I swear on my life, Peach. My lips are sealed if you say so."

"Good," she breathed. "My taxi cab…was hijacked by a few of Bowser's children."

"What?" Daisy howled, scampering away from Peach on the sofa. "You were _kidnapped_?"

"Not exactly!" She begged in response. "Daisy, you said you'd listen to me! You have to _keep_ listening!"

She took a few steady breaths, reminding herself that Peach was sitting on the same sofa as her, and thusly must have come out of the situation alright. Besides, the look in her face begged for so much understanding, it seemed outright cruel to fear the rest of the story. "I'm sorry, Peach. Keep…keep going." She sat closer to Peach again, still wary.

"The koopalings, Bowser's eight children-"

"_Eight?"_

"I know, I was surprised, too," Peach laughed.

"Who would have children with him? _Eight_ times?"

"Hey, now," Peach wasn't laughing. "Let me…let me finish this."

"Okay, okay," Daisy apologized, finding Peach's hard glare a little unsettling, considering the subject matter. "His eight children…"

"They _technically_ kidnapped me, without their father's knowledge, and took me to the Darklands. Once I got there, I was allowed to go back home, but…I _chose_ to stay. Mostly for diplomatic reasons."

"So…you've been staying in the _Darklands_ all week? The secret and rumored nonexistent homeland of your mortal nemesis and frequent kidnapper?"

"Um, yes." She answered simply, looking nervously out the window. "But you can't tell anyone quite yet. I just really wanted to get that off my chest."

"And you don't see anything wrong with that? You see nothing wrong with hiding in Bowser's homeland for an entire week without your security team having the slightest clue? Without your boyfriend, or best friend, or your _father_ knowing?"

"To my benefit, I really did want to tell you once I arrived, but reception there is terrible." Peach felt a smile, remembering one of her earliest conversations with Wendy. "And everything obviously ended up okay."

Daisy couldn't seem to do much more than nod at the moment. This was…_not_ the vacation she had expected Peach to retell. A controversial vacation on a topless beach, a questionable relationship with a peasant in some desert, a dangerous excursion through snowy mountains…those all seemed so much more likely and, at the moment, paled in comparison. But no, Peach was in enemy territory, doing what seemed like political and therefore dangerous work, and felt safe enough to keep it a secret. "Why did you stay so long?"

"Because I…" Peach faded off. She wasn't ready to tell Daisy the extent of her stay, even if she wanted to. And more importantly, Daisy didn't look ready. "That's a longer story."

She nodded. Daisy's eyes were unfocused as she processed the information.

"Dayz? Are you okay?"

"Just…surprised." She looked up at Peach. "Why would you put such a huge personal risk on yourself? On your _life_?"

"It wasn't really a risk. Bowser loves me too much to let anything happen to me in his territory. I was safer there than I ever am at home."

Her head had snapped up when Peach said "loves", and now her expression changed from the previous look of shock to one of disgust."Yeah, because you can't kidnap someone who has already been kidnapped," Daisy sneered. "And why are you so comfortable saying he loves you? How do you even know for sure?"

She blushed, having forgotten that it wasn't common knowledge. "It's…I just know he loves me now. For sure. It's kind of basic information in the Darklands."

Daisy stood up, running her hand through her hair. She made a lot of odd grunting, sighing, and clicking noises, as if unsure of even what word she wanted to form first. Finally, she sat down again, this time on the bed. "This is so _crazy_!"

"Trust me," Peach laughed, "it's even crazier for me."

"That's the thing. This maybe wouldn't be so weird to me if it was Mario, or Birdo, or even myself going off. But you're always so…not crazy, or spontaneous, or dangerous."

"It was exactly what I needed," Peach agreed. She thought about how much she'd grown from the week, especially living as a nearly unrecognizable citizen. And the fantastic attention she'd received from the one who loved her. "More than I ever imagined." She laughed, perfectly content in her own memories.

Daisy looked into Peach's eyes, lit with stars, even if they were once again unfocused. She let go of her confusion at Peach's change in character, and Daisy smiled. "I can tell, Peachy. I'm glad you went." She walked back to the sofa and took her hand. "And I can't wait to hear more about this secret week that keeps stealing you back from the present."

Peach looked at her with an unchanged smile. Her hair was curling around her face, making her look even younger than normal, and all the more innocent. "I can't wait to tell you. Just not yet. But for now…do you want me to help unpack anything?"

Daisy laughed and squeezed her hand. "Let's see if you left me any drawers in the bathroom, shall we?"

"Great idea!" Peach cheered, bouncing up. "You _have_ to see the Jacuzzi and shower in this place. I swear they were designed with gods in mind."

xxxx0o0o0o0o0o0o0xxxx

Mario and Luigi's room looked almost identical to Peach and Daisy's. The only change at first glance was the missing neat stack of suitcases in a corner. Instead, the brothers had their limited number of sturdy, dull bags tossed in the main hallway of the room. And unlike the Princesses, if anyone searched through any drawers, they would find nothing but fresh drawer liners embroidered with the hotel's logo, a fine detail the brothers would most likely never even discover.

What they had discovered, however, was the bathroom fit for deity. Mario was tucked under the sink's U-bend, tapping the pipes and inspecting the fine plumbing, while Luigi tested the various combinations of pressure, location, temperature, and mobility that eight shower knobs offered. "Mama Mia, Mario, would you look at-a this?" Luigi poked his head out of the shower, his moustache and front locks dripping. "If you have-a the highest temperature, the neck-aimed piston lowers in intensity, but everything else keeps fully powered. It-a would prevent burns, si?"

Mario squeezed out from the sink to answer, but just stared at Luigi wide-eyed. "You are-a soaking!"

His brother looked over himself, Luigi's green undershirt sticking to his lean frame and hat sopping over the side of his head. "And-a your point?"

"We're supposed to see Mama and-a Papa! You cannot-a see them like that; Mama would rather die!"

"I did not think of that," Luigi admitted. "I will go and-a change." One by one, he shut off the knobs and the water ran down the marble walls to the grate in the shower's center. Luigi shut the frosted glass and grabbed a plush, white robe to prevent from dripping all over the carpet.

"Be quick. It is-a getting close to dinner," Mario added. He looked to the right; the stained-glass window was filled with bright color as the sun hit in, setting into what was most likely a stunning sunset. Even this bathroom look like a palace, and Mario felt oddly out of sorts when he stood up, surrounded by what was normally familiar equipment in a completely unfamiliar setting. Peach's castle had nothing on the Ca' Shygredo.

He entered their bedroom, hunting for the television set while Luigi peeled off his wet clothes and traded them for a clean set. Mario found the remote, and pointed it at every suspicious hiding spot he could, hitting "power" and praying for a familiar sizzle of the television coming to life. He prodded at cabinets, paintings, and even bare walls before finally finding the television in the mirror facing the beds. It faded from its reflective façade to show some soap opera with characters yelling at each other in rapid-fire Italian.

Mario was just watching long enough to figure out that it was the dubbed version of _Shy Guys of Our Lives_, and that Jeremy was still lost at sea on his journey to confess his mistake to Clarice. "Have you-a seen this show, Luigi?"

He looked over at the television, his fresh green shirt only half on. "No. Is that…is that an alien wearing those earmuffs?"

"It's a snow-alien," Mario explained. Continuing, he explained, "they only-a have this show in territories occupied by-a koopas or shy-guys, so I only see it when I'm-a in an inn on an adventure."

"_Avvincente_," Luigi praised sarcastically.

"Hey, you would-a like it, Luigi," Mario assured him.

"I'm-a sure. Also, I'm-a dressed; let's get the girls." The brothers stood up and, after turning the television back into a well-disguised mirror, they left the room exactly the way they'd found it.

After just a single knock, Daisy swung the princess' door wide open. She grinned down at Luigi and Mario, hugging her boyfriend as she exclaimed, "Have you _seen_ our room?"

"Have you seen the shower?" Luigi asked in response.

"I have! It has like a bajillion knobs!"

"Well, only eight, but…"

"So are we ready to go to your parents'?" Peach interrupted, pleasantly.

Mario nodded, and led the group back to the dramatic cage elevator. They piled in, admittedly much more pleasant with each other now that they had rested up. The group chattered the ride down, and Mario led them back through the stunning hotel lobby and out towards the canals. Much like calling a taxi cab, he waved his hand and whistled loudly between his teeth. Promptly, a gondola situated itself next to the group.

"Ciao, my friends," the gondolier shy-guy greeted. He waited for them to get in the boat, and it rocked threateningly from side to side as they found seats. "Where to?"

Luigi pulled a wet and fragile sheet of paper out of his front pocket, replaced after he had changed his outfit. "Four seventy…one… Riga…" he squinted to read the blurry ink, "Rigatuna? Oh! Rigatoni! 471 Rigatoni Canal," he answered.

The gondolier shoved off, letting his boat slice through the water. The sunset sparkled in their wake, and Peach supposed this must be one of the most beautiful cities in the world. Especially considering how _clean_ it was. _Bowser wouldn't know what to do with himself here_, she mused. _There's not a single lick of pollution anywhere_.

The ride wasn't terribly long, as the Mario parents were, in fact, just down a few canals. The family home was quite small, nestled against the water with almost no room to stand and, in fact, the gondolier opened the door without a word of permission. Just a few feet down there was another door, this one leading into the actual home. He propelled the boat a few more feet so that the group lined up with the doorway, and patiently waited for his golden coins.

After they paid him and stepped into the small waiting hallway, Mario and Luigi began to be visibly excited all over again. "I have not-a seen Mama and Papa for seven years," Luigi explained to Daisy. "We only get-a the time to write. And most-a residents leave during Party Season." Mario knocked on the door and backed up, nervously gripping Peach's hand. She was suddenly glad they both wore gloves.

There was a gratuitous amount of noise behind the door. Chairs scraped and pots seemed to clash against each other as footsteps made haste towards the door. Italian chatter got louder and louder until they could just hear "_Vengo! Vengo!_" and "_Basta_, Adolfo!" from a woman's low voice.

She threw the door open with one hand, her other hand pushing her husband away. Mama Mario had her older son's build; short and stocky with curly, dark hair. She had stunning blue eyes that filled with tears the moment she saw her sons. Immediately, she let go of Papa Mario and started sobbing, throwing herself at Mario and Luigi. "My boys! My boys!" she cried, and added between sobs "Mi sei mancato molto! _Molto!_"

Realizing she wouldn't blockade him any longer, Papa Mario stepped outside as well. He looked strikingly like Luigi, except he sported a full goatee instead of just a moustache. His eyes were a reddish brown, not unlike his hair. "Scusi, ladies. Mama gets a little overexcited, you know? It is-a…_wonderful_ to meet you. You can call me Papa." He smiled warmly and put out a gloved hand to shake Peach's and Daisy's. "Let's go inside."

They walked past Mama Mario, her sons still captive in her grasp, repeating how she missed them _so much_. The front room of the Mario home was charming, though a bit overstuffed for two people. It seemed like they'd tried to stuff everything that fit in two homes into this one tiny canal-side house, and, somehow, actually managed to make it look decent.

Papa looked over at his wife and sighed. It seemed like she would never stop crying and smothering his son. A little louder than necessary, he told the girls, "Well, I guess I will-a make you some food to get-a yourself at home. What would-a you like? Mostaccoli? Cannoli? Spaghetti-O's?"

"Adolfo, no!" Mama Mario screeched, moving from her sons to her husband faster than one could imagine such a plump woman would move. She slapped him over the head and scowled up at him, warning, "You stay out of _my_ kitchen! _Non per voi!_ Shoo, shoo!" She pushed him away from the well-loved kitchen, turning her attention to the two girls. "And as for you two…are you hungry?"

Peach and Daisy blinked at each other. Daisy was the bravest, and answered, "Actually, I'm _starving_."

"Of course you are, you are-a so _skeeneey_. What do you-a want Mama to cook?" Her warm look changed yet again to a scrutinizing stare-down, as if their answer determined her acceptance of them as potential daughter-in-laws.

Peach looked back at Mario for help, but he and Luigi were still gripping each other and gasping for air. "Um…Mario's told me a lot about your Lasagna…But I know that takes a long time to cook."

Mama seemed pleased with her choice and bustled into the kitchen, chattering away that it was "not a problem at all-a. I can cook you up-a some Lasagna as fast as _veloce_!" Her voice was soon as hidden as her figure below all the clattering of dishes and ingredients.

"Would she want any help?" Peach asked. She longed for the familiar kitchen, remembering the instant kinship she felt helping Cookoopa and especially the koopalings. If she could get that here, it'd be one step closer to forgetting these thoughts that the Darklands had anything better to offer than her very own friends.

"No, no, signorita. If Mama wants-a your help, you help her. But if she doesn't ask…" He made a funny face, as if years of living with Mama Mario had changed his mind about the reasons why the kitchen was the most dangerous room in the house.

They laughed in understanding about the same time that Mario and Luigi recovered enough from their mother's affection to join them. Papa Mario turned to his boys and smiled. "My boys. Look at you. _Vi siete sviluppato così bene_!" He put a hand on each of their shoulders. Daisy watched as he looked at them with so much pride and affection, a look so unfamiliar to her that it caused Daisy physical pain. "I would-a hug you, but your sides look to still-a be sore."

They chuckled and nodded. "Papa, we have-a missed you so much."

Their father looked back with that same look. Proudly, he smiled at his sons. "Come- we have many-a stories to hear."

xxxx0o0o0o0o0o0o0xxxx

"Lemmy, get your foot off my face!" Iggy roared, bending over from the weight of his brother. He was acting like Iggy was a ladder, using him shamelessly to try and climb higher up the door. Unhearing, Lemmy's foot just slipped farther down and closer to Iggy's muzzle. "Gerroff! Gerroff!"

Helpfully as he could muster, Morton jump-tackled Lemmy, smashing him into the floor and snarled. "Why can't you hear words, you deaf-do-do? You're like a bat. A deaf, stupid, smelly bat who can't hear 'cuz he's deaf and stupid and smelly like you!"

"Now I can't see," Lemmy complained. He seemed to not care that he was pinned down on the stone floor with a tooth chipped and a kink in his tail. "I wanted to see King Dad."

Without his brother on his face, Iggy extended his height and pushed up. He was still a good few feet from the peep-hole in the conference door, even when he jumped. Once again, he questioned the logic of placing a peep-hole at a height only Bowser and the odd human could see through.

"Watch how a _real_ koopa gets things done, Lemster!" Bowser Junior called, bracing himself to run at the door. He screamed the entire run, making Iggy scream in just as high a pitch and duck into his shell. With only a change of expression from determination to terror, Junior tried to brake his run. However, the momentum was already there and he smashed right into the spiky back of Iggy's shell. He howled in pain and flew up in the air, screaming in terror once again as he began his descent. Junior grappled madly for anything to break his fall, his claws scraping themselves into the decorative grooves of the door. He screeched to a halt, placing his face directly over the peep-hole.

Junior's surprise at his success mingled with the continuing pain from crashing, and he was silent for a few moments. "See?" He finally managed to get out, not daring to move his position to look down at the shocked small crowd of brothers. "Told you I could do it."

"Well? What do you see?" Iggy asked, having come out of his shell and standing by the slowly recovering Lemmy. "Is Dad in there?"

He squinted, getting the best view he could of the now freakishly concave view. "Umm…yeah, I see him!" The group sighed in relief and Junior continued, "He's next to this thing that looks like a bear, and a bunch of koopas. The bear looks angry."

"Is the bear ugly? I bet it's not as ugly as you, Ugly McUggerson. You redefine hideous into ugly as a butt-monkey named Junior who is Ugly!"

"He's not as ugly as you, fart-face," Junior replied.

"Don't make me go over there and tear you apart for bird food!"

"Oh please," Junior scoffed, pleased that no one could see his face as he bluffed. "You couldn't reach me with a ladder, Shortypants."

"Junior," Iggy spoke up, clearly trying to calm them down. "What is Dad doing?"

"I haven't seen King Dad all day," Lemmy complained. "He just disappeared and I want to see him."

"We know, Lemmy," Iggy snarled. "That's why we've been looking for him and asking people where he is."

"Is he in there? Why can't I see him still?"

"Because there's a freaking door in the way! Goll, Lemmy, why do you have to be so slow all of the time?" he roared. Iggy saw Lemmy's face fall and immediately his heart sank. For being one of Lemmy's closest friends, he wasn't being a very good one. They had gotten together to find their missing father, no one willing to admit they actually _missed_ him except Lemmy, and now Iggy was treating him like an idiot when he was the only one smart enough to be honest about his emotions.

"Sorry, Iggy," Lemmy honestly apologized.

"No, Lemmy, _I'm_ sorry." He nudged his glasses to avoid looking at his brother. "That was uncalled for and-"

"Hate to interrupt the Lifetime Movie, but I'm still hanging here, and my claws are starting to hurt," Junior snarled, his face pressed into the door.

"Yeah, Sappy girly boys," Morton grumbled. "Stop being such girly pink frilly boys."

"Okay then, what's Dad doing now?" Iggy asked.

"He's…he's getting up. And now he's shaking the bear's hand, even though he still looks angry. I think Dad's laughing at him? And the koopas are…oh crap the koopas are coming to the door! Get me down, get me down!"

Morton continued to stand there, mocking Junior for resembling an ugly freak on a coat rack, while Iggy and Lemmy ran over to try and reach Junior's feet. "Let go!" Iggy shouted up at him, "We'll catch you!"

"I'm stuck! Really, really stuck! Oww oww oww don't do that!"

"I'm not doing _anything_!" They kept arguing, jumping around while Junior swung from side-to-side, and Morton laughing in the background. Then, the door swung open, taking Lemmy and Iggy along with it and smashing all three brothers against the wall. Morton just laughed even louder. He fell onto his back, rolling and unable to even form one-syllable insults as he laughed.

The koopas spilling out of the conference room only gave him a passing glance, talking too loudly among themselves to hear the shouts of despair from behind the big stone door. Bowser, however, stopped to stare at his embarrassment of a son. "You look like an idiot, Morton. What are you doing on the floor?"

He tried his best to stop laughing, but once Morton caught his breath and swung himself onto his feet, he saw the door, pressed open against the wall, and lost it again. "Whatever, freak," Bowser muttered. "I have more dumb meetings to go to. You are _so lucky_ your Mama Peach isn't here to see you look like an idiot."

"You're the one talking to someone who isn't sane enough to understand anything you're saying, sire," the bear grumbled, pushing past Bowser's shoulder to get away from the conference room.

"Good point. Maybe you should go talk to your slaves about how much you hate me. Oh wait…you don't _have_ slaves anymore. You don't even have _power_ anymore. And probably don't have friends, either." By now, Morton had stopped laughing and the other sons had used their combined strength to push the door off their backs.

The bear spun around, hatred in his eyes as he growled at the koopa king and lowered himself into a fighting stance. "You wanna go, old man?"

"Normally," Bowser started, walking in the direction and eventually passing the bear, "I would _love_ to shred you into 7,000 finely sliced pieces of fried bear-meat. But I have about seven more meetings to go to before I join my daughter in her slumber party. And you're not worth the detour."

He spun around to face the bear one last time. He opened his mouth, most likely to add some smug insult to solidify his superior manhood, but froze when he noticed Iggy and Lemmy, clutching Junior's legs and yanking him out of the door. Bowser cleared his throat in a manner that immediately got his sons' attention. "Boys, next time you see this over-grown teddy bear, avoid him. Apparently, his stupidity rubs off on you from the other side of the…door." Bowser chuckled and walked off, turning to enter yet another conference room full of people.

Awkwardly, the hallway was now void of everyone but a few straggling and unaware koopas, and the koopalings and the bear. They looked at each other in silence, rage still filling the bear's eyes. "You…uh…you wanna help?" Iggy asked.

Snarling, the bear walked over to Junior and looked at his predicament. He leaned against the wall, eye-to-eye with the youngest koopaling, and grinned, showing off his rows of deadly teeth. "Nobody can help fruitcakes whose father regularly attends sleepovers. As for your...situation? _Hang_ in there." Satisfied, the bear walked off, leaving the brothers in silence. Morton had no insults to add.

It was Lemmy who broke the silence first. He pointed at Junior and shrieked, "_Hang_ in there! Because you're _hanging_! It was a joke!"

* * *

**Author's Note: **I don't have much to say right now. I'm excited for what's going down next chapter; we get some really interesting discussion on Peach's half of the story, and Shankjam has helped me out with Bowser's half. It should be good all around. :)

And, with the grace of the fanfiction gods, it should be closer to on time.

also, still looking for anyone who may be Italian. I've already slipped up and uploaded a chapter with English "Italian" words, and the whole process would be so much easier and less frightening if anyone knows enough to help out.

-Razzi


	47. Storytime

**Foreword:** I'm terribly excited for this chapter. I got to write out the backstory I've been planning and altering since...well, since Super Mario Bros! Hopefully you'll like it as much as I loved writing it. :) And hopefully my attempt to get Bowser's staying at the sleepover works out. Yeesh.

* * *

Mario, Luigi, Peach, and Daisy sat in the Mario's comfortable sitting room, Papa Mario drinking a glass of red wine as he listened to Luigi tell stories of their adventures. Mario would interrupt to correct a detail now and again, but for the most part, he was just as quiet as normal. Daisy and Peach had far more to add, and for the most part, they weren't ever _on_ the adventures.

It was easy to talk to Papa Mario. He was warm and inviting, just like a father should be, but without a word of judgment. And he seemed just as curious about the lives of the princess' as those of his own sons. He asked where they lived, how much they reigned over, and what they hoped to do in the future. In Daisy's case, he talked a lot about the options she had with changing her career direction, as Luigi hadn't hidden her disdain for royalty from him.

Mama Mario would pop her head in now and again, usually between cooking a course, or while beating a bowl full of something or other. She would add her own remark, compare a story to something slightly embarrassing from the twins' childhood, or just ask for more detail. She was always the most curious about the exotic places the brothers adventured through and the places the princess' had explored, even Peach's many locales of being held hostage. "Oh, mama mia," she would always say, wistfully. "One day, Papa and I will-a see these places, and watch what the sunrise looks-a like _there_."

Her romantic view of the world was something Peach admired quite a bit. Besides being the one of the world's most romantic cities, Grand Canal was famous for their sunrises. And still, Mama seemed like she would do anything to see the sunrise from an igloo in Shiver City, the sand dunes of Sarasaland, and even from a crater in the moon. She was probably the source of Mario and Luigi's adventurous spirits, if anyone was. Peach realized that she had _no idea_ what Mario and Luigi would be like if they had grown up without a mother, and at the same time, realized she had no idea what she would have been like if she'd grown up _with_ one.

"Scusi," Papa Mario said as dinner grew closer to completion, "I have emptied my glass." He stood up slowly, walking to the kitchen where the bottle sat, when Mama Mario thrust herself in his path. "No, Adolfo. You cannot have two glasses before dinner even starts! _Vino, vino, vino!_"

"Aaah, Gema, today is a _circostanza speciale_. We have guests! Our boys are home! Time to celebrate!"

"You know what the doctor said, amore. Too much wine is bad for your _dolce coure_."

"One extra glass will not hurt, piccolo."

She shook her head. "Okay, Papa. But if you die first, I am-a going to kill you."

He laughed and held her hands, kissing her softly. "Okay. You win. I will fill this with-a water." He made a funny face, as if it was torture to do so.

"Good boy," Mama laughed. Just barely in sight from the sitting room, she whipped his behind with her towel. Soon, the four guests were alone in the room and could no longer see Mario and Luigi's parents, but they could still hear them squealing and laughing in the kitchen.

"You will-a have to excuse them," Mario apologized, looking with disappointment towards the kitchen. "They don't often-a have company."

"I think it's sweet," Daisy said, looking fondly towards the kitchen. "They're in love! No one should need to apologize for being in love and acting like it." She grabbed Luigi's hand and added, "You could take lessons, mister."

Luigi blushed and muttered something about propriety, which made Daisy laugh and roll her eyes. Peach looked at them and felt honestly jealous. Here she was, sitting next to the boyfriend she'd had even longer than Daisy and Luigi had known each other, and she didn't really even want to hold his hand, let alone have him learn lessons from his parents. They were another story.

Peach wanted their kind of love _so badly_, the kind where they would grow old together, have fights about who got to die first because it would be too painful to be alone, and couldn't be in the same room together without making a spectacle of how mad they were for each other. But, she realized, Mario would never be that kind of husband. And as Peach had enjoyed her week without Mario a _lot_ more than she had thus far enjoyed this one, she doubted she would ever be that kind of wife. At least not to him.

But if not Mario, then who?...Bowser? There would certainly be a lot more emotion, and, proudly, Peach realized that even if she was 103, Bowser would not want her to be anywhere but by his side, where he could hug and kiss her. And if Peach was 103, she wouldn't want to be anywhere but with… Peach suddenly felt very far away from the sitting room. She was very cold and very alone. These were very dangerous thoughts to be thinking.

She grabbed Mario's hand, probably a little more aggressively than she should have, seeing as Mario gulped at the unexpected pain. Frustratingly, Peach noted that this feeling of holding Mario's hand was still not the same pleasant feeling she got from holding Bowser's hand. Obviously, Mario was doing something wrong.

"Okay, _bambinos_," Papa Mario sang as he reentered the room with a glass of water, tinted red from its previous contents. "Time to go in for dinner."

"Adolfo, dinner can-a wait a few moments. _Dare un'occhiata a,_ the little love-blossoms."

"Don't be silly," Daisy commented, quite boldly. "Let's go sit down, before your famous lasagna gets cold, Mama Mario."

The dining room extended off of the kitchen, and it was obvious that this was the second-most used room in the house. The chairs each had three different shades of tan fabric, worn from years of sitting, and the table was warped to the point that even the tablecloth couldn't hide it. The wallpaper looked freshly washed, but it was still peeling around the corners, and the beige carpet was spotted in reds, purples, and even green in some places. And yet, it looked as put-together and welcoming as the Marios themselves.

"Pick a seat," Papa Mario said, "Any seat. Just not my seat or Mama's." He walked over to the head of the table, sitting proudly where he could see the whole group. Mama was in the kitchen, preparing the first course, while everyone picked their seats. Papa had his feet propped on the chair to his left, evidently protecting Mama's seat.

Once everyone was seated, Mama brought in the salad: a huge, white bowl, overflowing with leafy greens and brightly colored fruits. Immediately, Mario reached out to grab the salad tongs, but Mama slapped his hand away. "Mario, your manners went where? First we say Grace."

"Oh," Mario muttered. "Sorry, I forgot."

"Have you been not saying Grace, Mario?" his mother grilled, clearly disappointed where all his upbringing had gone.

"Gema, do not-a worry. I will say Grace. Mario and Luigi will not-a forget."

"But what about our _nipotes_? What if their daddies do not teach them proper manners? Who will, Adolfo?"

Adolfo looked apologetically over at the princesses. "Mama, bow your head. We will-a discuss this later." With a dramatic sigh, she put her head down and her hands out, one for her husband to hold and the other for her son. The group was soon connected as everyone held hands, even those unfamiliar with the practice. In Italian, he began, "Benedici Signore noi e il cibo che stiamo per prendere, fà che non manchi mai a nessuno in nessuna parte del mondo, specialmente ai bambini. Amen."

"Amen"s circled the table and heads began to pop up. Brightly, as if she had forgotten all her worries about the manners of her posterity, Mama sang, "buon appetito!" and served Mario his serving first. The salad was as delicious as it looked, and soon the group was sharing compliments around the table. Mama brushed each one away, telling them all of how the fruit crop was extra good this year, and she had _nothing_ to do with that, or how the salad had been marinating for a long time, which was also not her doing.

The salad was gone quite quickly, and Mama already had the lasagna on the table, steaming in its five-layer glory. The dinner guests eagerly piled it onto their plates, sitting on top of the few pieces of lettuce still stuck to the plates. Before she dug in, Peach asked, "So, what brought you two back to Grand Canal?"

Papa swallowed his bite and replied, "We aren't really _back_ to Grand-a Canal, Peach. But we came-a back to the Kingdom for our boys."

"I cannot decide if it is worse to be in the same realm and never see them, or actually have the excuse of a separate realm," Mama whined. "vergognati, boys. You should visit your poor, retired parents more often."

"Why did you ever leave?" Daisy asked curiously. "Luigi doesn't talk very much about Brooklyn."

"It's a long story," Papa cautioned, shaking his head. "And is-a very boring."

"_Idioze_, Adolfo. Is very good story! Only boring when _you_ tell it."

"Not true!" Papa scoffed. "You could not tell it any better than I could, Gema."

"Would you want to bet?" she laughed. Turning her attention to the princesses, she said, "I will-a tell the story. You say if it is-a boring or not."

"I'm sure it won't be boring, Mama Mario," Peach encouraged.

"You will-a be wrong, Peach!" Papa Mario laughed. "You see."

Mama took a bite filled with lasagna before beginning her story.

xxxx0o0o0o0o0o0o0xxxx

Toadsworth bit his lip and hastily erased what he had written on the paper. Then, almost immediately, he wrote the _same_ word back in its place. When the door creaked open behind him, he howled in surprise.

"Calm down, Toadsworth. It's just me," Toadette begged. She stepped farther into the room and peered over his shoulder. "Is that the note that's supposed to go in Peach's bouquet? I thought His Majesty wanted that _hours_ ago."

"Well," he muttered, "I want it to be absolutely perfect."

"How was she, anyway? When you saw her at the airport?"

"She was…" he fought for the right word, debating between _eccentric_ and _impossible_. Finally, he decided on, "excited." He gave Toadette a meaningful look. "I don't know what happened to her before she got off that big bird, but I haven't seen her so bloomin' joyful since…well…ever." He sat back and blew a low whistle. "And yet, nobody has a spot of a clue _why_."

Toadette pulled up a chair, intrigued. "What do you mean 'excited'? How was she acting?"

"Well," Toadsworth started, "She wouldn't stop smiling, and she was hugging every blooming person she saw. The little lass wouldn't take a thing seriously, and I swear, she was literally _glowing_ with whatever joy had overtaken her, wot wot. And she didn't seem to prefer one person over the other at _all_. She hugged me just as much as she hugged Daisy, or even Mario. And it was absolutely _impossible_ to keep her attention for more than a hare's second; she was always whirring around like she was on some…mushroom rush."

Toadette began to ponder, thinking about how this may connect with her own beliefs about Peach. "And Mario? Was she particularly happy to see him?"

Toadsworth looked at her with crossed-eyes, clearly not amused. "What did I just say a flipping two seconds ago? She wasn't particularly happy to see any person more than any other. Including Mario."

The toad continued her slow walk through the room, one hand behind her back and the other playing with one of her 'pig-tails'. "And she was…_glowing_, you say? Would you describe this as a warm glow, or a light-infused glow?"

Toadsworth sunk into his seat to consider it, though it was pretty obvious he didn't think it really mattered what sort of abnormal glowing Peach had gone through. "Mostly warm, but she was pretty bloomin' lit-up, too."

"And she acted in this manner…after getting off the plane?"

"Yes, marm, she did. Toadette, why-"

She ignored him and turned on the spot, asking more questions as she continued to pace. "How long did she maintain this high? Were there any moments it seemed to…fade?"

"Well…yeah, there were a few spots where she calmed down. At one time," Toadsworth explained with a laugh, "she was bloomin' silent and we couldn't get nary a word out of her!"

"Would you describe these moments as _reflective_ or _sorrowful_ or _contemplative_?"

"What is with all these questions, poppet?"

"Or is there another word you believe suits the situation better?" she answered, again ignoring his unhelpful response.

Toadsworth sighed audibly. "Reflective, I'd say. A tad bit of sorrow wouldn't be far off the map."

Toadette began to brighten, rushing around to face Toadsworth. She hunched over and grabbed his knees, shouting into his face, "This means I was right! Everything I said would happen now _has_!" She let go of his knees, the force knocking his chair back. In between laughs, she offered him help up, but once Toadsworth was standing again, Toadette threw her arms around him and squeezed him, laughing even harder.

"Toadette! What in the name of the Queen are you _talking_ about?"

Toadette stopped laughing long enough to remark, "we don't _have_ a queen, Toadsworth."

"Not currently, but that's neither here nor there. Now answer my question, poppet!"

"Isn't it obvious?" She laughed harder. "Peach is in _love_! She fell in _love_ on her trip! And with someone who isn't Mario, too."

Toadsworth was taken aback. Honestly, he'd never seriously considered that she might fall in love with someone against his own personal plans. "Rubbish. Why would you ever say that?"

"Everything you said points directly to her being in love, that's why. She's swept off her feet, head over heels, heart in the clouds, in love! And I would bet you 10 to 1 that she'd just been kissed before getting off that plane."

"Why on _earth_ would you seriously believe your own personal barrage of lies?"

"I'll prove it to you!" Toadette sang, excitedly.

"Oh? And how, pray tell, will you do that?"

She was, finally, at a loss for words. "I don't know yet. Maybe Peach will tell us herself. Ooh! Idea!" She ran back to Toadsworth, as somehow during their conversation she had ended up on the opposite wall. "Peach is calling tonight, isn't she?"

"What, you want me to pick up the phone and say, 'cheerio, Princess Peach! I've got a little bugger of a question for you, old gel. Are you in love with someone besides the person you're currently on a romantic getaway and most likely seated next to? Now answer up, pip pip!'"

"Pretty much," Toadette replied. "In fact, I bet being so straight-forward about it will shock her into honesty."

Toadette began prancing around the room, reciting plans for extracting the 'truth' out of Peach, and discussing all the people she was most certainly in love with, until Toadsworth stopped her. "Poppet, calm down. I need you to think about this seriously."

"I am!"

"No, Toadette." He grabbed her arms to hold her still. "Listen to me. You and I both know you don't _honestly_ think she's in love with someone else. You're just _hoping_ she is, so you can ride off into the sunset with Mario. Which we both doubly know will _not_ happen."

"Stop it! That's not true!"

"What isn't? That you and Mario won't be happily ever after? That he isn't a man so far out of your league that you need to stop wasting your life on trying?"

Hot tears were quickly filling Toadette's eyes, and she looked angry beneath all her evident pain. "You're wrong, Toadsworth. And Peach really is in love, you'll see. You're wrong." She threw his arms down and stormed out of the room, trying not to let his see her cry. "And you're really mean for such an old toad."

"Don't you storm out of here like that, young lass!"

"Your not my father, Toadsworth! _Or_ Peach's! Stop acting like you know everything. And finish your freaking note. Maybe you can manage to ruin _her_ day, too!"

"Toadette!" The door slammed, leaving Toadsworth alone. He picked his chair off the floor to better slump into it and stared at the note on his desk. He had absolutely no energy to finish it, instead burrowing his head into his arms. What had he done?

xxxx0o0o0o0o0o0o0xxxx

Wendy and Peach's friends, all twenty-eight of them, were bounding around the conference room, chattering and shrieking and making a terrible din. The room had been transformed, tables replace with enormous beds covered in lush blankets and pillows, desks replaced with piles of junk-food and sodas, and the elaborate Bowser fountain now spouting chocolate. The giant pull-down screen was showing some late-night television that most girls weren't paying any mind to, and board games and haphazard piles of cards were spread throughout the room.

A bell rang outside the door, and Wendy jumped up, shrieking for joy. "That's, like, _totally_ Chet with the pizza!" The other girls laughed and crowded around the door as Wendy tripped over herself to get to the door. She straightened out her bow, touched up her lipgloss, and dramatically unlocked and swung the door open, only to reveal her father.

"Oh. It's just you, Dad," she groaned.

"_Just_ me?" Bowser snarled, "Aren't I the guest of honor?"

"Well, we're all getting really hungry for pizza, y'know," she answered.

"Oh yeah, that reminds me," Bowser said, bending out of their view and pulling a cart behind him into the room, steaming with dozens of pizza boxes. "I saw that pizzakoopa struggling down the hallway, so I told him I could bring the rest of the pizzas over with me."

"What?" Wendy cried, her face falling into an extremely over-dramatic expression of terror. "You…you…_took_ his pizzas?"

"Sure did!" Bowser answered with a mischievous grin. "Who wants pepperoni?"

"WHY did you do such a thing?" she shrieked, pulling at Bowser's arm.

"Because I 'love being mean', princess. You get it from me, y'know." He smirked and shook her off.

"Daaaad, this is now officially the Worst Sleepover Ever." She pouted and sat down on the floor, where four other girls rushed to comfort her. "Chet was, like, always the highlight of the night."

"What, does he come in and do a little song-and-dance when he delivered the pizza? Fed it to you by hand? Brought you gowns of silk and necklaces of rubies instead of anchovies?"

"No," she snarled, "But he's a _boy_, and he's an _attractive boy_, and we don't get those at sleepovers."

"Except for Christian Pale and Taylor Goomblaur," a kitty boo sighed, turning her attention to the television dreamily.

"And you, sire," a young koopa cooed. "_You're_ an attractive…_man_."

Bowser stared at the girl, squinting his eyes at her. "As flatteringly creepy as that is," he turned to face his daughter, "why don't you get many boys here?"

"Dad, you're so clueless. Sleepovers are, like, totally the best thing ever, and boys never know that." She opened a box of pizza and removed a piece absolutely covered in fried fruit. She ate the entire thing in two bites, continuing with a full mouth, "They're totally missing out. It's, like, a travesty."

Bowser bent down to her height, his eyes glowing with the fire that Wendy could feel growing in his throat. "Do you mean to tell me that I'm currently here, as I have loudly announced to most of my fellow dignihats and underlings, at a _sissy girl thing_?"

Wendy swallowed and stared back at her father, deeply intimidated. "Um…will I, like, be grounded if I say yes?"

"Ohoho, Wendy, you'll be _worse_ than grounded," he snarled. The sleepover guests had crowded around them, unable to hear Bowser and Wendy without invading their personal space.

"I-I-I just thought you'd want to sh-sh-share your, like, story to all of us. And, like, sleepovers are the-the-the best way to do that," she stuttered, batting her eyelashes for added effect of innocence.

Bowser rocked back on his heels, pondering Wendy's words. "Well," he muttered, "I _do_ want to talk about Peach…"

"So you'll stay?" she chirped, "You're not mad?"

"I'm staying, but that sure as heck don't mean I'm not mad, Wendy O. Koopa. And by the end of the night, we are going to have the best excuse ever as to why I, the most macho, ferocious king this empire has ever seen, spent his night with a bunch of sissy teenage girls."

The crowd of girls laughed and chattered in agreement, backing up to give the royals room to stand.

Bowser stretched his back, grabbing a half of a pizza and taking a huge bite. "Now," he growled through the cheese, sauce, and assortment of meats, "get ready for a story that is going to blow your girly minds!"

xxxx0o0o0o0o0o0o0xxxx

"First, you have to hear how we fell in love," Mama Mario began, fondly.

"Mama mia, Mama!" Mario droned. "Why do you have to tell that story _again_?"

"Well, your girls have not-a heard the story, Mario. Besides, I like the story, and it is important." She smiled at him.

"I'll tell this part, Gema," Papa Mario said. "It started years and years and years before today, when I was a major-league fighter at the Glitz Pit."

Daisy leaned over the table, her hair dangerously close to the lasagna. "You fought at the Glitz Pit?"

"That's the thing that's like wrestling, right?" Peach asked.

"No, no, and no. Adolfo, this is why _I_ tell the story. You only tell lies. Girls, it was _me_ fighting at the Glitz Pit, not Papa. He was there, but only as a plumber."

"That I believe," Luigi laughed, nudging his father in the side.

"And Peach, _cirumachella_, it's not at all like-a wrestling. Wrestling is for brutes."

"And for people who are stronger than 'fighters'," Papa interrupted.

"Says the man who can-a only do two push-ups, _pappamolle_." She laughed. "Anyway, so I was a fighter at the Glitz Pit, and Papa was hired to repair one of the toilets in one of the major leauge's dressing room. It had a problem where if the fighter using it was-a too small, they would-a fall right in and right to the other dressing room."

"Papa, it's broken again. It still-a does that," Mario commented.

"Mario, that is-a because Papa never fixed it," Mama Mario laughed. "He travelled right through the pipes and met me on the other end, while I was-a stretching before I went-a on. He was-a covered in grease, and I was-a covered in sweat, but it was-a like love at first sight. He put-a down his tools, sat by me on the bench, and we started to talking." Mama looked over at her husband fondly, giggling as if she was still that young girl, flirting with the plumber. "We talked so long, I missed all of my bells and was-a disqualified.

"During our conversation, we realized we both lived in the area between Grand Canal and Linguine Empire, sometimes-a called Ravioli Valley. Adolfo said he lived-a just ten minutes from _mia casa_. He lied, by the way, as his-a house was a two _hour_ walk, and Papa could-a not afford a car, or a yoshi, or anything like-a that."

"But seeing her again was worth it!" Papa Mario explained. "And eventually," he smiled, "we decided to-a meet in the middle. We would-a meet several times a month."

"Our parents thought we were crazy!" Mama laughed, "which we probably were. But this was a matter of _amore_, and Raviolians understand that supersedes all other tings. So after three months, Papa proposed. It was-a very romantic," she added, grinning at the princesses. "I had told him that-a my dream was to one day live in Grand Canal and watch the sunrise over the water. He got the whole town-"

"The toads who lived in the town between our homes, Verona City, knew us very well by then: the two love-struck young humans who met almost every week and knew no one in the city besides each other. They were-a very helpful when I told them what-a my plan was," Papa explained fondly.

"Well, the _whole-a town_ was turned upside-town. There were lanterns over the streets, which were all-a filled with at least two feet of water, and the buildings were all-a covered in fabric to look older, like stone. And, he had a gondola. Adolfo had made me my Grand Canal, and he promised that one day, we would spend our sunrises with-a the _real_ one," Gema explained. She rubbed her hand over her husbands, staring into his eyes like it was that same magical day. "So I said _si_, and I have never once-a regretted it."

Daisy was gripping Luigi's hands, her eyes filled with emotion as she cooed, "That's beautiful! So amazing! What a story!"

"Oh, that's not the end, Highness," Papa laughed. "Mama tells her stories way too long. She is detailing a _romanzo_, not an explanation."

"At least it is-a not boring," teased Mama.

"Yes, please continue!" Peach begged. "I want to hear why you ever left the realm, knowing that love story!"

"Well, Papa and I moved into Verona City, and bought ourselves a toad home where we could raise a happy family. _We_ were happy; it was-a our _bonna vita_. But from before Mario and Luigi even joined our family, the realm was too dangerous for two _bambinos_ like my boys. We almost lost them before they were even ours…" she muttered, looking pained. Peach had heard about baby Mario and Luigi's kidnapping, and the valiant rescue from the Yoshis, but hadn't often considered how much that would affect the expectant parents. "Little _bambinos_ should not need to worry about magikoopas, or bandits, or boos. We could not ever take them out of the city's safety, not even visit their _nonni_, because it was always-a too dangerous. Papa and I wanted to grow old together in-a the realm where we had-a grown up, but our boys came-a first.

"There was a way, it-a was discovered, to go to a _different _realm, where our ancestral humans were the only dominant race, and where it-a would be safer to raise two little boys. So, Papa and I packed up our things, sold our home, and found the pipe to Earth. It took us to Brooklyn, in a sewer, but once we reached-a the surface, we realized we had found home. This would-a be our new _bonna vita_. Papa quickly got a job as a plumber, and our gold coins as-a big as-a your face, which are just-a currency in _this_ realm, afforded us a nice apartment and a new chance for _bonna vita_. I did peoples' laundry and raised our boys. They grew up in Brooklyn, and we-a told them Papa and I were-a from _Italia_."

"But Mario and-a Luigi are too curious for Brooklyn," Papa commented. "They had-a memories of toads, and koopas, and mushrooms from being toddlers that-a we could _not_ explain."

"-Until they-a were _old enough_," Mama assured the group. "When they-a were legal adults, we pulled out our photo albums and story books. They believed us very fast, because to our _bambinos_, there was-a always something missing. Papa brought them-a to the pipe that brought us to Brooklyn, and we said our-a _arrevederci_." Mama looked like she was tearing up, and her husband tugged her hand in strength. "Obviously, this realm was ready to have our-a boys back where they belong." She smiled fondly at her boys, wiping a tear out of her eyes.

"Papa and I stayed behind. He had-a good job, I had-a good friends, and we had debts to pay off. Gold-a coins only last so long. It took us years, but finally, Adolfo made good on his promise, and brought us to our new home, our final _bonna vita_. And now, every morning, we can see the sunrise where it-a belongs, over the water where _we_ belong."

"Gema, you have hardly touched your lasagna," Papa Mario said softly, tapping her pasta with his own fork.

"_Scusi_, I was busy telling the guests why I chose to waste my life with you, _amore_."

"For me," Papa said, addressing the guests around him, "she just-a has to cook, and I would-a _never_ leave her side."

"You _couldn't_, Papa. You would die of starvation," Gema teased. "You do not-a even know how to boil water for noodles." In reply, he stole a bite of Gema's lasagna, and the couple began to laugh, stealing from each other's plates.

"See," Mario apologized to Peach, "I told-a you, _no_ good around-a company."

"Just because they don't _need_ to be," Peach justified, watching Mario's parents carefully. "They _want_ to spend the rest of their lives together, Mario, whether or not anyone else gets to share it with them." She turned to him, whispering, "I think that's wonderful." She watched him gulp, his eyes darting to hers, away, and then back again.

Peach tried to mask her sigh by taking another bite of her lasagna's remainders. It was pretty obvious that she wouldn't be able to last a whole lifetime with Mario. Getting through dinner was hard enough.

* * *

**Author's Note: **I feel ridiculous for not knowing a single thing to say right now. I don't even have any idea what to say about next chapter. Just that I'm planning on getting it done on time (Planning is the key word- I'm going to college by the end of the month and heaven knows that's not going to give me any more freetime than summer has).

And of course, my apologies to those readers who know Italian and, as such, know how much I'm butchering your language.

-Razzi


	48. Different Perspectives Entirely

Foreword:

YOU GUYS. I'M ON TIME. In fact, I'm early! One fantastic commenter suggested I post before I get to college, and that sounded like such a brilliant idea that I'm literally on my way right now and posting! Of course, 49 isn't written beyond a few sentances, but I thought that in case I get whirled up in the start-of-term insanity, I won't be late for a chapter that was already done. This one was written quite quickly, probably because it sounds like a filler. Bowser's section at least does...but I do find it beneficial, as a good review for me (and you guys, too, probably). And I rewrote Peach's section three times and am still not 100 percent thrilled with it, but I think it accomplishes what it ought to, which is not being a filler section.

Disclaimer stands that I own absolutely nothing. But I do own Super Mario Fruit snacks! And in case anyone wanted to know, Luigi is _delicious_. ;)

* * *

The girls were all crowded around Bowser as he sat on a large, pink pouf in the center of the room. He had two boxes of pizza next to him, all his eager audience in arms' reach of some sort of junk food. At least four girls had facial masks on, but even they had hands near the bowls of popcorn. "So, I assume you want the whole story?"

"Every last detail!" someone shrieked, and several girls agreed.

"Start when she got to the Palace!"

"No; start when you _found out_ she was at the Palace!"

"Even the details we _already know_, Valkoopy added, a hint of bragging rights in her voice.

Bowser was happy to oblige. Such a fascinated audience and pleasant story to tell made him _very_ happy. "Well, it all started at the beginning of the week, when I was having a very important discussion with Kammy, my old hag. And she got this call from Kamek, on her wand, saying how I needed to go to one of the hangars, because my kids were there. Of course, I already knew this. I had hatched the plan, which, by the way, was foolproof, with my kids earlier. Isn't that right, Wendy?"

"Sure, Dad," she agreed, very sarcastically.

Bowser continued with his story in great detail, telling the girls how Peach was _supposed_ to be on a secret vacation, so no one would know that she was kidnapped, and that it was just like she had vacationed on her own free will to the Darklands. He told them how she wasn't very happy at first- Valkoopy was quick to agree and give her sidenote- but how that didn't last long. He told them all about their romantic dinner, leaving out the part where Peach ran away screaming, and emphasized how she came to him, begging for his attention the very next morning.

He detailed all about the next day, how she was so eager to tour the Palace. He embellished the way Peach got overheated in the central heating duct, saying how she had to grip onto him to keep balance, and held on longer than they needed. He told them eagerly how she went to meet his children and hit it off while he was busy, and how they went to McGoomba's for dinner. The girls found immense amusement in that, a few of them admitting for what seemed like the first time that they, too, loved to eat the greasy food they served there. Then, dramatically, he told them about when they sat on the bench together and watched the lights. He spoke slowly, his eyes so starry Wendy swore he could see the dancing lights all over again. And Bowser didn't embellish a single sentence.

At this point in the story, Valkoopy interrupted. "The next morning, Peach was a _total_ wreck. She wouldn't wake up, she wouldn't eat; Bowser had to send me in to check on her-"

"Hey, jerk-jam, who said you had permission to talk?" Bowser snarled.

"Well, you don't know any part of this story, sire, so I thought it only fair _I_ tell it. If I don't right now, you'll probably _never_ hear it!" Bowser grumbled, allowing her to continue, which Valkoopy did, smugly. However, her continuation wasn't much more than repetition that Peach was silent and depressed, which bored Bowser quickly, so he cut in.

"Jerk-jam over here did her no good, so I got the brilliant idea all on my own that she should go on a picnic with me and the kids. Then she could get to know them anyway! She was _completely excited_ to go, and put on her best outfit for me. I took her to a really pretty secret place that's cooler than any places you bums know. And it was there, when we were walking and she was holding my hand all lovey-dovey, that I told her I loved her."

Bowser paused his story for effect, taking a giant bite out of his pizza while the girls shrieked, grabbed onto each other and started talking amidst themselves. The young koopa who obviously had a crush on the Koopa King looked a little personally offended. Other girls started asking Bowser what she said, practically crawling over each other to get closer, now that Bowser's story had even more momentum.

"She said…she said…" Bowser paused, unsure if he wanted to be honest about Peach's answer that still hadn't changed since that third day with her. "'I know'." He swallowed his pizza and looked over the girls. They were hushed, muttering things to each other, some looking pleased, others disappointed. "_Anyway_," Bowser growled, "The rest of the day was wonderful." He continued to tell them about the games they played, food they ate, and a few notable conversations the group had before they flew back home, all tired out. He mentioned how he and Peach had discussed Klawdia, but said nothing more than that. Compared to his expression of glee every time he said Peach's name, mentioning his dead wife seemed like torture.

Bowser skipped telling them about his tantrum and tear-filled episode with Kamek, moving directly on to when he ran into her in the hall, telling them word-for-word about how embarrassed and flighty Peach was acting, and especially about how she asked him out. That particular section he told three times, by request of the very thrilled audience. He was also _very_ keen to emphasize their short, but meaningful conversation about his ideal birthday present. He promised them, when they asked that they would "find out later, freakazoids" if he ever got that, and to "get their tails out of a twist."

Their instance with playing Pickleball was also extremely detailed, Bowser lingered with an unearthly expression as he told them about helping Peach in her stances, and how lovely she looked in her sportsy outfit. He told them about that for longer than many felt comfortable with, and it wasn't until Wendy cleared her throat that he awkwardly skipped ahead in the day to dinner that evening. Valkoopy cut in, saying that she talked to Peach before that. "She was _completely_ on Cloud Nine, all giggly and floatsy about King Bowser."

"She was?" Bowser asked, leaning in. Taking that as the king's permission, all the other sleepover guests turned expectedly towards Valkoopy.

Pleased, she told them all the things Peach had said, or at least as many as she could remember. "She was talking so fast, and about so many unimportant things, it was hard to keep track. But I'll tell you one thing- she had fallen hard already." Bowser grinned, his claws moving quickly from his knees to cover his face and then back again. Apparently, Peach had told almost the same lengthy stories that Bowser was telling the girls now, just from her point of view and in a lot faster and with a lot more distractions. Once she finished, Bowser looked terribly proud. He kept trying to open his mouth, say something witty about how it should be expected that she'd be so all over him, but he couldn't say anything, and ended up with a giggle instead.

The girls stared "aww"ing, fighting to get to Bowser and hug him. This intense evidence of Bowser's shrinking dignity shook him back to reality, and he snarled, "Get back on the floor, you sissy-girlies. I have more story to tell, and you need to pay attention or I'll chuck you all in the dungeon!" He nodded fiercely, and summarized their dinner by saying that them two talked for _hours_ about nothing in particular. Even that short of a summary threw the girls into another small tizzy, gossiping amongst themselves.

Bowser's birthday seemed like it took as long to retell as it did to happen, as Bowser insisted on using great detail to not only explain all the wonderful experiences he had getting closer romantically to Peach, but also all the elaborate gifts and celebrations he received. But once he got to Peach's gift of one of her sapphires, he was stuck, choking on his own tears.

"Do you still have it?" one of the girls asked, bright eyed and clutching her pillow for dear life.

In reply, Bowser dug into his shell and pulled it out, shining bright from his countless caresses. Someone looked as if she wanted it passed around, but Bowser glared, clutching the sapphire close to his heart and far from the sticky-fingered audience members. He did, however, read the inscription on the back out loud.

He complained about not seeing Peach much more after that until the ball, but that it was completely worth it when he saw her in her ball gown, hand-crafted just that week. His description of her was so sweet, so filled with love, that the girls were all gripping at their hearts or each other's hands, cooing at his obvious adoration. His description of the evening was exactly as the ball went from his point of view; it consisted of nothing but Peach. He never mentioned the food, except how she looked when she ate it. His description of their first dance lasted longer than the actual song, getting glassy-eyed about her hands in his, and their feet moving together. He only mentioned the food-fight to brag about how they ran off together.

He talked about their dancing, emphasizing that she never wanted to leave his side, and in a moment of very uncharacteristic storytelling, completely skipped over the dance contest in favor of their slow songs. The girls were pleased with the intense detail he remembered and used, and even found the moments Bowser described as a "blur" to be fantastically romantic. He was very proud to tell about how Peach acted when she met his sister, Bell, and almost as proud to describe how courteous and wonderful she was when she said goodbye to the first half guests and hello to the second half guests.

He didn't tell them about how he let her get completely drunk on koopale, but _did_ tell them how she called him handsome. But their private hour or so on the patio, under the stars and all alone, Bowser chose to keep private. Oh, he told them it happened, but kept silent about just how close they had been to each other, and how every second was a fight to keep from kissing her all over her body. He mentioned the last few songs, and told them how embarrassing it was to sing Peach the last song, but how dang _happy_ she seemed to hear him do it. And, of course, how they seemed like the perfect parents as they sent Lemmy to bed afterwards.

He went through the following day a little quicker, focusing on how Peach would lean on him, hold his arms and hands, and in general be a lot more generous with her affection. The events of the day seemed almost nonexistent to Bowser, as he jumped from highlight to highlight, hardly explaining where they even took place outside the palace. And he was _very_ proud to explain how they spent the day pretending to be couples of varying commitment, getting comments right and left about what a wonderful couple they made.

Telling the story, Bowser looked like a kid in a candy store, jumping from moment to moment with his eyes growing wider each detail. Things were out of order, most making almost no sense, but to him, it was the best story ever told. The only part that he told exactly in the right order and with non Peach-related details was their escape from the cause-play, a score of koopatrol hot on their heels. It helped, of course, that Bowser got to talk about their episode behind the dumpster once they finished running.

He didn't tell much about going to Flurrie's show, almost skipping the entire section of time, if Peach hadn't gotten so flustered. Bowser was just so excited to go on to describe their conversation on the flight home, which he also rushed, trying desperately to get to when they slept in Peach's room together, but awkwardly cut himself off mid-word. _Peach said to keep that a secret_, Bowser growled inwardly. He paused, and in a very forced tone that was completely foreign from his previous storytelling voices, muttered, "then she said goodnight and I didn't see her again until the morning." He nodded fiercely, eating more pizza and allowing the girls a short break to mutter and giggle some more.

"What happened in the morning?" one of the girls asked, for some reason thinking that Bowser wasn't going to tell them.

"A bunch of unimportant sappy stuff," Bowser muttered, swiping at the air with his claw. "I gave her the pickleball room, she said goodbye to the kids, we flew home on the plane-"

"Woah, woah, woah!" Valkoopy complained, sitting up straight. "What happened to your hours of detail? Those seem like pretty big things, Your Majesty!"

"Look, chipmunk cheeks. Those things are smaller than your brain-cells in comparison to what I'm about to tell you, so shut up and listen.

"When we touched down, and were saying goodbye, Peach apparently took it upon herself to remember the birthday gift I wanted." With that, the entire room went ballistic. A few girls actually stood up and started hugging and jumping up and down, the other girls smacking each others' legs and arms, screaming into their faces. Bowser used some of his conductor's skills learned from Ludwig to shut them up all at once, and said, quietly, "Do you want to hear about it or not?"

Immediately, they all nodded as a group, clutching on to whoever was closest. Wendy's eyes were the size of her shell, and she was gripping her knees so hard, they had turned white. Bowser smiled at them all. "She was standing on something, so we were the same height, and she said my name even sweeter than she normally did. Then, she took my chin in her hand and pulled it closer to her face. Then," he paused, both for effect and to fully indulge himself in the memory, "she kissed me. It was…_perfect_."

The room let out a communal sigh, their eyes all starry. Bowser continued, "we kept kissing for awhile, and let me tell you, it was the best experience I've ever had in my _life_. It was like every good thing in the world was in between her two lips, and it was all mine. It felt like that moment was never going to end, and if the world collapsed in on itself, we two would still be there, forever. Never to be separated, never to be alone, and never to be sad again." Bowser smiled. For a faint moment, he considered that tomorrow he would probably hate himself for being so _honest_ in front of all these strangers. But at this moment, it felt so good! Surely, Peach was telling everyone she knew, if the kiss was at all as amazing and earth-stopping to her as it was to him.

"You guys," he said quietly, leaning in towards the gaggle of girls, still gripping each other, a few wiping tears out of their eyes, "I love her. I really, really, honestly love her."

"Oh, Daddy," Wendy said, gasping for air as she tried not to cry, "we know!"

xxxx0o0o0o0o0o0o0xxxx

Peach was brushing her hair, enjoying the moments of peace and luxury while Daisy hummed something quick-paced, choosing between her nightgowns.

"What are you so worried about looking nice for, Dayz?" Peach asked, flipping her hair to brush a different section. "We're just going to bed."

"_You're_ the one brushing your hair forty times, Peachy," she laughed. "Besides, you never know when a certain someone might come knocking on your door." She winked at Peach, giggling before she asked, "Now, yellow or orange?" She lifted the two nightgowns up, one low-cut, the other nearly see-through.

"You really think Luigi's going to…stop by tonight?"

"Well, not to _do_ anything with me. Maybe he'll kiss me on the cheek or something. But yeah, I do think he'll come over." She straightened up in front of the mirror, having tossed away the yellow strings of lace in place of a blue dress that cinched along her features and had a slit up the side and virtually no back. "Didn't you notice? He was fantastically friendly when we were all getting gelatos. I think my hints about taking after his father really started to sink in."

"Well, you _did_ tell him, and I quote, if he had half the confidence of your father, he might not end up single with 35 cats who will never know the warmth of human touch. And I think you said something about sparing the gene pool an embarrassing excuse for an Italian, too. And why on earth _did_ you bring so many…um…"

"Well, I had to have _something_ in all those suitcases my father's servants needed me to bring. Now, honestly. Would Luigi like the blue or the orange more, you think?"

"Depends, are you trying to make him want you, or want you to stop scaring the mustache off his face?"

Daisy laughed, nodding. "Orange it is, with a cami underneath." She quickly changed, shouting out from behind the curtain, "I'm just so happy we're here together! You have no idea how much our talk during the gelato seemed to hit him. I don't care if it's his parents or just the romantic atmosphere; I'm gonna bottle this city up and pour it in his daily pasta!"

"I'm happy for you, Daisy," Peach laughed. She put her brush down and pulled her hair into a thick ponytail.

Her cousin bounced onto the bed, now dressed in her pale orange nightgown that clung to her curves like shrink wrap. "I bet, by the end of these seven days, he'll be ready to _propose_. Maybe even pick out a ring right here, in the city!"

Peach fell back onto the pillows and sighed more dramatically than necessary. "I forgot we're here for seven days. Do you realize that's even longer than my private vacation was?

"What does that matter?" Daisy asked, playing with her camisole. "You're with your friends longer than you're with Bowser's children and citizens. Isn't that a good thing? Safer? Happier? More like a vacation?"

"It's not that _exactly_," Peach whined. She yawned, and in her tired, vulnerable state, explained, "It's more that I'm with Mario longer than I'm with Bowser."

Daisy looked up from her chest and over at Peach. "You didn't tell me you were _with_ Bowser." She leaned in closer. "Are you…okay? Did he give you any drugs? Do anything to you? Maybe you have a vague memory of a period of time?"

"Daisy, it was nothing like that-"

"Peach, what's the safety word?"

"He didn't brainwash me! I just made friends with him, that's all!"

"Friends? _What's the safety word, Peach?_"

"Avacado-berry! The safety word is Avacado-berry, your first boyfriend was Tommy Fletcher, and you've never liked the piano but learned it anyway so you could look like Elta Joan."

Daisy leaned a little farther away and reexamined Peach. "Okay, so you're not brainwashed. Are you sure you're not sick or something?"

"Why, for saying I'm friends with Bowser? Or for not thinking it's fair that…that…"

"That you have to spend an amazing week in an amazing city with your best friends and boyf-"

"_Don't_ you call him my boyfriend," Peach snarled.

"Why are you getting so upset? Don't you love Mario?" Daisy asked.

Flustered, Peach stuttered, "Has it ever really been established that we're together? Or that I could possibly love him?"

"Uhum, yes, it has! Two weeks ago you were set on getting a proposal this week!"

"Well, I…he certainly doesn't act like we're together."

"No, Peach, he does. In the same way he has for years. It's _you_ who seems to be falling short lately. And for what reason? You spend five days with an evil koopa who has a thing for blondes in pink dresses, end up thinking you're _friends_, and suddenly the man you've spent years trying to marry isn't up to scruff enough to be labeled your boyfriend?"

"Actually, Daisy, yes. That's exactly it. Bowser loves me and _shows it_. And Mario's not like Luigi; he's not just shy, and I can't just threaten him to a life of celibacy while he's hopped up on gelato and then, sunshine and lollypops, he gets a free exhibition of his lingerie-clad future wife. There's nothing there! He doesn't hold my hand the same way, he doesn't want us to have a forever the same way…for goodness sakes, Daisy, he hardly makes eye-contact with me!"

"Maybe he's nervous, Peach! Romance isn't the same as rescuing you from your doom. It takes a different kind of person completely to be good at it."

"And it takes a different kind of person completely for me to love, too."

Daisy narrowed her eyes at Peach, leaning close again. "What happened last week, Peach? This is not the Princess who left the castle."

"I…ah…I told you. I made friends with Bowser."

"This isn't a real friendship, Peach. Friends don't uproot everyone else in your social life just to make room for themselves."

"Bowser isn't uprooting anyone," Peach fought back. She fidgeted a bit before continuing, "but maybe I am. He's made me realize that if Mario can't love me when I'm practically throwing myself at him, I need to stop trying. Bowser has made me realize that I _am_ worth something, that I _am_ beautiful, and smart, and funny, and that I deserve to be appreciated and I deserve to have someone in my life that smiles whenever I enter the room, and makes me smile back, no matter how many reasons I have to be frowning."

"And Bowser made you realize this? Just by being your friend for a week?" Peach hardened her expression and nodded cautiously. Daisy sat back, seemed to think for a minute, and then looked back at Peach. Her frown melted into a wide smile and she threw her arms around Peach, squeezing her tightly. "Well, that doesn't sound too terrible after all! Maybe being friends with Bowser is _exactly_ what you've been needing!"

"What are you talking about, Daisy? You love me with Mario!"

"Of course I do, Peach. And it's killing me that you've fallen out of love with the man you were picturing yourself with your whole life. He saves your life, and you always seem so happy with him, and glad when he shows up! But love shouldn't be about a safety issue, and it certainly should be dry and cold. And especially not degrading to your-self worth! You know what," she added, standing up and tapping her chin, "this is making more and more sense to me. You've been carting Mario around for years, and have you ever really loved him as…obsessively as Bowser loves you?"

"Not even close," Peach laughed.

"And yet, you've been considering him your End All, Be All. You made Mario out to be your Prince Charming, who not only saved you from horrid beasts, but would steal your heart and be your significant other until death do you part. But Mario never consistently made you feel special, right?"

"Only special enough to keep alive," Peach added, sounding a little sad. "We're more than friends, but I can't help thinking he would do the same for Luigi, or you."

"Honey, he _did_ do the same for Luigi and me. Just not as often." Excitedly, Daisy leaned onto the bed and continued. "And you know _why_? Because Bowser doesn't love _us_; he only loves you! And now that, for whatever cracked-out reason that you had better explain ASAP, you two are buddy-buddy, you get to feel what it's like to be really, truly loved. I mean, without fearing for your life at the same time. He's made you realize you deserve more than Mario's brand of romance and, thusly, deserve to be happy. Why? Because you _are_ special!"

She sat down on her own bed, bouncing into place. "Why didn't you ever tell anybody that you don't love Mario?"

"Because I didn't know," she answered honestly. "I thought that what we had was _it_. I never really understood why you cared so much to get Luigi out of his shell and into your arms."

"You see why nine choices in slutty pajamas is necessary?" Daisy laughed, indicating her nightgown. "He makes me feel like I don't even need to try, but at the same exact moment, makes me want to give him the very best I can offer." She smiled, breathing deeply. "Plus, I just _love_ how much his moustache quivers when he can't seem to stay in the real world. Which I seem to be very good at doing to him."

Peach smiled. "Daisy, I'm glad you're not trying to get my head examined for spending a week with Bowser and enjoying it. He's…a really great guy."

Making a face, Daisy countered, "I don't understand how you can put _Bowser_ under the description of 'really great guy', but I would assume that has to do with your story?"

She laughed and nodded. "All will be explained; I promise, Daisy. If you knew him as well as I do now, you would just love him, too."

"I don't know about that. It's easier to admire a guy who consistently puts himself in life-threatening danger to try and hold your hand. He probably wouldn't try so hard to get my approval."

"That's the weird thing…it seems like _everyone_ who knows him just adores him! You know how my subjects go crazy when I go out in the street? When he shows his face, they're scraping at the ground just to get closer to him. And not because they're scared, either! I mean, to go out in public, Bowser and I had to-"

Both girls went stone-silent when the hotel room phone rang. Whispering, Daisy panicked, "who is that?"

"I don't know!" Peach replied in a whisper. They looked at the phone like it could explode with each consecutive ring. It was an antique phone with a spinning dial and certainly no caller ID. Hesitantly, she reached for it and, in a deep disguised voice, asked, "Hello?"

"Who is this?" a frantic voice with an English accent asked, "I thought I called the Princess' room! Who are _you?_ I swear, I'll have you strung and quartered if you've laid even one finger on either of those women! If you've even _thought_ of-"

Peach put her hand on the bottom of the phone, and said to Daisy, "It's just Toadsworth." She laughed and said into the phone, in her regular voice, "Toadsworth, it's me; Princess Peach. I didn't know who was calling."

"Oh!" he sighed dramatically and chuckled. "You had me so bally worried, old gel. Why haven't you called yet? And why is your cell phone off, love?"

"I forgot to turn it back on, sorry. And I guess I just forgot to call you, too."

"Well stop forgetting, poppet. You're going to give this old toad a heart attack."

While Peach was on the phone with Toadsworth, there was a soft knock at their door. Daisy tripped over herself to get there, straightening out her nightgown and winking at Peach. She flung the door open, making certain to brush her hair back at the same time. "Why, hello there, Luigi,"

Luigi caught sight of Daisy, seeing more thigh than he normally ever saw on any girls, and shot his eyes right back to her face. "H-h-hello, Daisy. Umm, I came to...Uh…actually, I do not remember-a why I-….uh…" his eyes had traveled back down her figure, and he snapped them back up, now wringing his hands, too. "Why I came. Um…did I disturb you? Are you-a…going to sleep right now?"

She got closer to him and twisted her arms around his neck, kissing his bulbous nose. "Just thinking about you." Daisy smirked, close enough to feel Luigi's moustache quiver. "Come on, let's talk in the other room. Peach is on the phone." She traced a finger along his overalls and unbuttoned just one. "woops," Daisy whispered, walking with Luigi, completely dumbstruck, farther out into the hallway. She shut the door forcefully with her foot, leaving Peach alone with the phone.

"Princess?" Toadsworth asked.

"Sorry, Toadsworth," she laughed. "I was watching Daisy and Luigi. They're just so funny."

"Ah? What are the twitterpated off to now, eh?"

"Honestly, I have no idea," she replied, falling back onto her bed. "How's the castle?"

"Oh, the same as usual," he answered. "We miss you, of course. You've been gone too long, poppet! And we don't even know _where_ you were last week."

"I'll tell you next time we talk, I promise. I would just feel bad telling you before I told Mario and Luigi."

"So _Daisy_ knows where you were?"

"Well…yeah. But I didn't tell her _everything_."

"What's 'everything', Peach? Should I be worried?"

"Um, no?" Peach hit herself on the forehead, feeling like she had lost all sense of how to misdirect people over the week of such honesty with Bowser. "Can we talk about something else?"

"Actually, Toadette would like a word, if you don't mind," he suggested.

"That sounds lovely," Peach agreed.

As soon as she had the phone in her hands, Toadette shrieked, "Are you in love?"

"Excuse me?" Peach stuttered, sitting straight up again.

"Do you love somebody? Besides Mario?"

"Um…I…don't…know? How did you know I don't…what?"

"You don't love Mario, right?"

"Who told you that?" Peach asked, scanning the room and suddenly mad at herself for not checking its security before spewing her fountain of honesty.

"Is that a 'yes' or a 'no'? Because I think you don't love him anymore."

"Why do you think that?"

"'Yes' or 'No', your highness?"

"Toadette, I _really_ don't want to have this discussion right now…what if the phone is tapped? Would either answer be very beneficial to anyone if overheard?"

"Well, since your public position is that yes, you love him, _that_ would be beneficial to be overheard. And since you obviously can't work yourself to say that, I think the answer is n-"

Her voice was suddenly muffled and Toadsworth's came back to the phone, saying, "I'm terribly sorry, Princess, that won't happen again. Toadette seems to have this _crazy_ idea in her head that you spent the week falling for someone else. And, oh poppet, you would just _die_ if you knew who she thought your lover to be!"

"I'm sure I would," Peach muttered, still scanning the room. "Where exactly did she get that crazy idea?" But Peach didn't get to hear Toadsworth's answer, because right as he was explaining, her hotel door slammed open against the wall again, Daisy singing at the top of her lungs as she came in. His explanation was completely drowned out. "I'm sorry, Toadsworth," Peach yelled into the receiver as Daisy spun around closer and closer to Peach, "But Daisy just came back in. And I think she wants to talk to me."

He was saying something, either a collection of goodbyes or shouts of disapproval, when Daisy leapt over and nimbly pressed down on the phone, hanging up on the old Toad. "Peach, Peach, Peach!" Daisy sang out, flumping backwards onto her bed. "I need to talk to you!"

"About me and my week some more?" Peach asked, hanging up the phone with a bit more dignity.

"No, silly." Daisy curled her blankets around her and beamed at Peach. Her entire face was glowing. "About _me_. And about how much I _love_ having Luigi here!" She giggled and covered her face in blankets.

"I don't mind talking about that," Peach agreed pleasantly. She laughed. "You know, Daisy, you are a _completely_ different person when he catches you off-guard like he obviously just did. What happened while you two were off?"

"Oh, you know," Daisy said, poking her head out. "I guess you could say he got a little tongue-tied." She started giggling again, and covered her face in blankets, before throwing them off and looking at Peach very seriously. "So. We need to talk about this."

"What exactly would you like to talk about? Are you going to give me a step-by-step recall or something?"

"That'd be fun!" Daisy said, a little too eagerly.

"And a little unnecessary," Peach cautioned. "I was joking, Dayz."

Daisy stuck out her tongue in defiance. "One day, Peach, you'll fall in love for real. Then you'll understand what it's like to kiss so amazing and earth-stopping, you'll want to tell _everyone_ you know all about it."

Peach's mind went instantly to her final birthday gift she gave to Bowser. That kiss that she had replayed so many times in her mind, it should be worn through but was still just as fresh and wonderful. The one that she wanted to tell all about to not only Daisy, but Toadsworth, Mario and Luigi, Bowser's children, the gondolier, and the janitor in the hallway.

But she couldn't. That would be bad.

She wasn't supposed to have enjoyed it, anyway.

That would be bad.

Peach nodded firmly. She looked at Daisy's face, completely lost in her own little world, and understood exactly how she must feel. She was jealous of Daisy's freedom, but wanted her to have every joy of utilizing it that Peach felt she couldn't. "Never mind, Daisy. I want you to tell me everything. Every single detail your heart could ever desire."

Daisy smiled, squeezing her comforter as she looked at Peach. "Get ready for a long night, Peachy, because I'm in an _amazingly_ talkative mood!"

* * *

**Author's Note: **No, we are not going to hear Daisy's life story next chapter. As much as I LOVE Luigi and Daisy, it doesn't accomplish anything. (And I don't want to hear any gruff about how Bowser's life story didn't accomplish anything! It accomplished me getting to write more of Bowser being lovey-dovey!)

49 should be a good chapter, if all goes as planned. We should be finishing up with the silly sleepover and getting Peach going in this BEAUTIFUL city of Grand Canal, and those are both very entertaining things, I'm hoping. If anyone noticed, I'm trying to give this last bit of story an extra push, trying to find a balance between being rushed and taking 2 years to write 1 day. Hopefully I will be able to set aside some time to actually write!

Also, yay for no Italian to screw up this chapter! :)

Good luck to everyone starting school, and see you next month!

-Razzi


	49. Sick to the Stomach

**Foreword:** Let's not waste time discussing how late this is or the fact that it has taken me an ENTIRE SEMESTER to put out what I consider to be a very sub-par chapter. I can promise you I intend on improving for 50, both in writing and in timeliness, which (happily for my sake) will not be a hard goal to accomplish. I am so, so sorry to all of you who have been waiting for an update and disappointed. It's been killing me. College is more draining on freetime than I ever imagined.

You've waited long enough and I have nothing left to say, except to remind you that I own nothing of Nintendo's and I am so very honestly sorry.

* * *

"This movie sucks," Bowser growled.

"Daddy, shush," Wendy snarled back, stuffing more popcorn in her mouth. The entire room of girls had turned their attention to the television, watching intensely as the lanky, dark-skinned reptile looked down at the younger koopa girl, wind tossing her unnaturally long hair.

"They're not even saying anything!" Bowser whined. It was true; this part of the movie seemed to only contain the two star-struck lovers, staring deeply into each other's eyes.

"They're about to!" Wendy shot back in a whisper. Right on cue, she mouthed the words along with the male protagonist.

"_I'm so jealous of the wind,_"

"_But why?_" the koopa girl asked back, stepping closer to her beau. He took a step back

"_It can touch you, caress you, swirl all around you, and play with your waterfall of hair. There can be no fate worse than ours._"

"_Because if you touch me, I turn into stone?_"

"_No. Because every time I _can't_, my heart turns to stone instead_."

The girls in the audience gave a collective sigh, one even lurching out a sob. Bowser groaned, and stood up. "I liked it better when they didn't say anything at all. At least then they weren't repeating various taglines every five minutes." He dipped his slice of pizza into the chocolate fountain, stuffing it in his mouth. In muffled words, he said, "I fought we weren' suppose to wath mothies uhnight ay-way."

"Daddy, stop interrupting. This is a good part."

He swallowed and continued, "Are you kidding? _This _is the movie's redeeming scene? I thought you said it was a monster movie- I haven't seen a single drop of blood yet."

"It _is_ a monster movie," one of the girls replied. "Jason is a basilisk. But unlike common and incorrect mythology, he doesn't petrify people by looking at them. His eye-contact is just so piercing and breath-taking that you _feel_ like stone. But if he touches anyone, they _actually_ become stone."

Bowser scoffed. "You girls are all dumb. Dumb little girly girls. You even said-" He dipped another slice and stuffed it in his mouth, "we weren' suppose to watch mothies uhnight."

Wendy shook her head. "We're not supposed to until at _least_ three. And it was 3:40 when we started this. It's bad to start them early because people tend to fall asleep."

"I kin see why," Bowser growled.

Ignoring him, Wendy continued, "But we've already had five girls fall asleep, and already frozen bras, painted their faces, given them whip-cream hair-dos, and moved their sleeping bags. We met our quota."

"_I_ think we should go back to those pranks instead of this dumb thing. At least that was fun _and_ more masculine. This is neither."

"The point of sleepovers is _not_ to be masculine. It's like practically the opposite," Wendy snapped. She suddenly froze in fear, looking up at her father's angry look. "Um, why don't we take a walk, Daddy?"

"Yes," he growled, "Why don't we?" Bowser grabbed Wendy roughly by the arm and started storming to the door, his claw frozen on the handle. As of right now, everyone in the Palace that Bowser had yet to blurt his plans to assumed he was off doing something terribly masculine. "Um, actually, let's just sit down and play a game."

"I thought you totally hated sleepover games," Wendy asked.

"You guys play 'Truth or Dare' and the only dares you _ever_ do are things like 'call this boy' or 'drink water out of the toilet'. And that whole 'light as a feather, stiff as a board' isn't fun unless you drop the punk on their head. So yes, I _would_ hate those games." He dragged her over to a mountain of practically untouched board games, except for one missing game of _Connect 4_. Bowser grabbed a box from the middle of the pile, avalanching all the other games around them and creating a terrible amount of noise, and an even worse mess for the janitorial staff in the morning. "_We're_ playing _Battleship_."

Finding this punishment much better than whatever Bowser was going to do to her outside, Wendy consented. With the movie going on beyond the destroyed pile of games, they settled into sitting positions and set up the game. Bowser grunted as they put together the frame, "I wish you girls played video games."

"Like a lot of us do, Dad. We just didn't think to have any sent up."

Bowser picked up a lid to his side and looked at his daughter with a scrutinizing gaze. "Instead you requested _Trivial Pursuit_? Really? What kind of koopa are you, Wendy O.?"

She stuck her tongue out at her dad and started putting pegs into place. "So Dad…why did you let Peach go? Why didn't you, like, kidnap her? I mean, she was totally happy here."

Bowser sighed, putting his pegs in place as well. "That's exactly why, ugly. She was happy…and I thought…I didn't want to ruin that. Now I kinda wish I'd kept her here anyway." He gave a half-smile, and in the mean times found a satisfactory place for his smallest ship.

"Well, I think it was a very…noble thing to do, Daddy. Like a real gentleman."

"It's not something that dumb basilisk would have done," Bowser disagreed with a bemused expression. "He even said he'd rather have Larissa turned to stone than never see her beautiful face."

"But he, like, also said 'no matter how much it kills me, I want you to be able to see the golden sunset, feel the dewy grass, and comb through your luscious hair; even if it's without me.' And even, 'Leave me, Larissa, for how can your true love be one who cannot hold your hand? Let someone else guide you through life and be your supporting shoulder. I would find more joy in your happiness than I could ever find in your sorrow.'"

"That line made _no sense_," Bowser grunted, adding "G-4".

"Miss," Wendy replied, "And I _knew_ you were watching, Daddy! A-17."

"Miss," Bowser replied, his claws itching to move a piece that she was just one space from hitting. "It's not like there was a lot of other things to do, woman. C-4."

"Hit," Wendy growled. She put a red peg on her cruiser with a dramatic flourish and sigh. "Anyways, what I was trying to get at was that, like, you're doing the _right thing_, Daddy. Letting Peach choose for herself if she wants to be with you, or if she wants to be an idiot. I'm just…surprised that you actually _did_ the right thing. E-7."

"Miss. You suck at this game, Wendy…not that I'm surprised. This is a game of strategy, brilliance, and swift and total destruction. C-5."

"Miss," Wendy replied, sticking out her tongue. "D-8."

Bowser looked down at his board, terribly upset that Wendy had, in fact, placed a hit on his littlest ship. "Miss," he lied, and as he put in a white peg, Bowser shifted the ship over a space.

"_I_ think it's because Peach is a good influence on you, Daddy."

A pang of guilt hit Bowser, imagining how unamused Peach would be that he was cheating in Battleship. He would give anything to hear her complaints, but since she wasn't here to voice them, he left the little ship floating happily on D-7. "She probably is. But nobody's perfect, I guess. C-3."

"Hit," Wendy groaned, adding another red peg with a dramatic flourish. "Dad, you're so weird."

"I get it from your side of the family, twerp," he replied, giving Wendy a rare smile.

She smiled back, a little too evilly, and answered back, "D-7."

Daisy was _still_ overenthusiastic and talkative the next morning, as they were out on the narrow streets of Grand Canal, window-shopping while the boys attended a private press-conference with a royal family they had previously rescued from harm. The princesses entered stores, often without even really looking hard at the fares they offered, but instead commenting on their own lives.

Peach had a whirlwind of emotions attached to Daisy's euphoria. On occasion, she was absolutely ecstatic for his cousin. She was acting as if Luigi had proposed to her, when in reality, it was a very _different_ dream of Daisy's that had played itself out. She had always teased Luigi that he wouldn't ever have the guts to kiss her for longer than thirty seconds or so, but he had proven her wrong. They made-out, _very_ passionately, for apparently quite a long time. And according to Daisy, they would have kept going if the unfortunate lady in the hallway hadn't starting freaking out at them and their public display of affection. Only _then_ had Luigi realized his embarrassment.

Of course, Peach was also terribly jealous. Daisy had promised Peach earlier that one day, she would fall in love for real. Then she would understand what it's like to kiss so amazing and earth-stopping, she'd want to tell _everyone_ you know all about it. Yes, Peach remembered that promise word-for-word. Because, unlike the passion and excitement of their hands and lips and tongues, Peach actually _could_ relate to that promise, that experience.

And she was _so_ jealous that while Daisy could spend hours relaying and repeating _her_ kiss, Peach was doomed to silence. No one could know that she, too, had experienced a kiss that made the earth stand still, that contained every good thing in the world, and that seemed like it ought to last forever, beyond the collapse of the world itself. In fact, the only reason Peach didn't want to smack the grin right off of Daisy's face was remembering her own grin. Daisy put up with Peach when she was high off her own raging emotions. This was the least she could do.

At one of their rare moments where the girls actually _cared_ about the contents of the stores, Daisy pointed out a fancy hat to Peach. "Look at this! It looks like a peacock exploded-"

"-On a lace nest!" Peach finished. They picked up the techno-color hat, taller than either girl's face and wider than their hips, laughing at it. Peach put it on, and they laughed some more. "Where would anyone _wear_ this?"

Daisy pointed out another woman in the store, looking through the shimmering scarves. On _her_ head was perched an actual stuffed peacock, apparently sweating pearl strands, and resting on a brim of silver shag. "Maybe we should ask her. Is it a party hat?"

"Proof of membership to get into a super-exclusive club?"

"A way to protect yourself from the Mafia?"

"Oh no," Peach denied with a shake of her head. "I think this would be too cruel and unusual for the Mafia."

"Not to mention heavier than cement shoes," Daisy added as she put it on her own head, straightening her back. "What do you think; am I the next Top Model?"

They giggled incessantly, playing their way through the store's hats and other accessories. When a shy-guy entered, sporting a scarf comprised completely of peacock feathers that was so fluffy it hid his already masked face, they had to leave the store to catch their breath.

"So, Peachy," Daisy said as they sat on a bench one of the few dry alleys, "I think we've exhausted _my_ favorite topic of discussion. After the Peacock Club, I mean."

"We _have_?" She asked in mock surprise.

"At least for the next twenty minutes," Daisy laughed. "I want to hear more about your week being friends with Bowser."

"Well," Peach asked, blushing for some terrible reason, "What do you want to know? I don't…reaaaally want to talk about it in the middle of the city."

Daisy pondered for a minute before answering, "Well we're at least 30 minutes from the hotel-"

"-and by then you'll be ready to talk about Luigi again," Peach finished with a smirk.

"Probably," Daisy laughed. "Here- let's get a gondola. We can talk there _and_ head back to the hotel…the boys will be done with their interview in about an hour anyway."

"We didn't buy anything," Peach complained, but Daisy had already hailed a gondola.

"Ciao, bellas!" the gondolier, a charming little shy-guy, purred. "And-a where are such-a beautiful ladies going to this-a morning?"

"WE NEED," Daisy began, shouting her words slowly and _very_ loudly, "TO GO TO HOTEL CA'SHYGREDO. CA-SHY-GRE-DO. È CHIARO?"

The gondolier chuckeld, looking at Daisy amusedly. "Si, bella. Are you in a rush-a?"

Daisy's face went blank. "Shoot," she muttered to Peach, "How do you say 'no' in Italian?"

"Dayz, I think he speaks English," Peach muttered back. She looked over at the gondolier, who was smirking at the two tourist princesses.

"Of course he doesn't!" Daisy hissed. "Remember our first gondolier? He didn't know a _word_ of English. This guy just knows a few phrases. And I think 'no' is just 'no'." She turned to the gondolier and shouted, "NO. GRAZI."

"Okay, bellas," he replied, chuckling. "Partiamo!" He shoved off from the narrow bank and started them down the canal, warbling an old Italian song as they glided in the middle lane, away from the much faster moving boats.

"Okay Peach; go!"

Peach tried to roll her eyes at Daisy as she perched herself to listen, but just _thinking_ about talking about her time with Bowser made me smile. "Like I told you, he didn't kidnap me. It was…it was more his kids. But Bowser didn't want me to go home, either. So he was doing everything he could to make me feel comfortable. He really loves me, Daisy. He really, really does. And when he's not busy trying to find ways to kill Mario, he's a very fun guy to be around. He's really funny, too. And surprisingly sweet!"

Daisy smiled at Peach, a little annoyed. "Hun, we already had this discussion. I want to hear your _story_. I want to know _how_ you…realized? Decided?...figured out that Bowser is so…"

"Wonderful?"

"Sure," Daisy laughed. "I would _love_ to hear the story of how Bowser is wonderful."

"Okay, but I just want to make sure you're still okay with this. Remember last night, when you and I were talking about how being friends with Bowser was an ideal change for me?" Peach was awfully fidgety, messing with her skirt and looking from the crooning gondolier to Daisy over and over again. "That's…important. Because I don't want you to think I'm brainwashed or something. This is a real story. And this is real…friend…ship."

"I know, Peach. Just tell your story."

She exhaled and steeled herself before starting. "I had decided to take a solo vacation the night that Mario told me he had other plans last week than our original ones. I figured that, if I just called my own cab and didn't tell anyone until they couldn't stop me, and I was _safe_ the way no one actually believes I can be, everything would work out. I still don't know how, but the koopalings- that's what they call Bowser's children in the Darklands- knew my plan and…intervened. So I fell unconscious in the cab and ended up waking up in a totally strange bed with no service and no memory of what had-"

"Woah, woah woah. You woke up in a strange bed? With _no_ memories and…this is _okay_ with you?"

"Oh dear," Peach muttered, hiding her mouth from Daisy. "That sounds terrible! But it wasn't like that, I swear."

"How do you know; you had no memories!"

"Well, it never occurred to me at the time that it was a…questionable position, but trust me, I _know_ nothing…worse than kidnapping…happened. Trust me." Peach waited until Daisy lowered her guard a bit and then she took a deep breath and continued. "When Bowser normally kidnaps me, he's usually really, really busy. Every once in a while he'll try to woo me or whatever, but it's always…of second importance. He takes Mario and Luigi a lot more seriously than we always think he does, because…well that's not important right now. What _is_ important is this time, Bowser didn't have much to distract him from me. And from his little apology-video-thing that showed up in my room, I could tell he wasn't the same Bowser I'm afraid of. He was…funny."

"Peach, you are all over the place. What apology video?"

Peach sighed as if Daisy's question was an enormous burden. "He wanted me to know that it wasn't his idea to kidnap me. And he was so…flustered." She smiled in a way that was evidently not intentional. "But I certainly didn't _like_ him yet. I was furious!"

In a lot less detail than probably sufficient, Peach described how unhappy she was, how she went to Bowser's dinner because she felt morally obliged, not even mentioning Valkoopy's prodding, but ended up leaving in a total fit and freaking out in her room. "That, you see, was probably the turning point of the week. Well, the first turning point. Probably the most important…well, maybe not _the _most important, but definitely the most pivitol. It-"

"You're rambling again."

"Sorry," Peach blushed. "What I was trying to say was…that was the moment when I decided to give Bowser a chance, and let us both have a more pleasant week than we would have otherwise. Purely because that was the right thing to do as a princess…but that decision changed…everything."

She described the next day very fondly, all about her tour of the Palace. How she started to see Bowser's sense of humor and the soft center that he hid so protectively. She told Daisy all about his children, lovingly describing their traits, both physical in personality. Daisy had to stop her on nearly all of the eight children from going off in a complete tangent, but Daisy could tell right away- Peach had taken the "Mama" title and latched on to it with as much love as possible. She spent nearly five minutes describing the lights that Bowser showed her, and mostly how close she felt to him at that moment, how she almost forgot _all_ her prejudice, how she almost wanted him to hold her. As Peach retold this moment, she looked almost confused. As if considering the moment out loud gave it more resonance than before. She stopped talking, biting her lip and thinking about the moment and everything it meant.

"Hey! Earth to Princess Peach!" Daisy barked, waving her hands in front of Peach.

"Sorry, I just…I just realized why I had those dreams that night. I…uh…I dreamed about me being with Bowser that night. And it wasn't a nightmare at _all_. And I never figured out why until now…in fact, that next morning, I just cooped myself up in the room and sat there really depressed until the koopalings came in to get me."

"Why do you think you had that dream?"

Peach looked at Daisy very seriously and said, "I think I was starting to…oh, never mind."

"No!" Daisy shrieked, standing up to jump at Peach. The gondola rocked violently and the gondolier spun around to glare at them. Sprawled over her cousin, Daisy flashed an apologetic grin over her shoulder. "Scusi," she said and fumbled back to a sitting position. "This is a discussion, Peach. You do not say 'never mind' and get away with it."

But she _didn't_ want Daisy to mind. Peach wished with all her heart that she hadn't said anything because how was she supposed to admit that she had considered herself to be falling in…no. It wasn't that. That moment was just…the start of their friendship. Their forbidden friendship. "I was starting to become his friend," Peach finally finished. "And that's not supposed to happen, so I felt guilty."

Although not entirely satisfied, Daisy sighed for Peach to continue. "Like I said, the koopalings had come to get me. Apparently, Bowser wanted us all to go on a family picnic. It was really fun, but the important part was that was where he first told me he loved me. I was _completely_ shell-shocked. Not surprised, really, even though I honestly hadn't considered it before. But somehow, I already knew that he loved me, deep down. So I told him."

"Told him what?"

"That I knew that already. I just said 'I know'. It…became my crutch. It was an easy way to reply to Bowser whenever he said he loved me…which, by the way," Peach started to grin and curl up, holding her knees close to her face, "he said a lot."

"And that's all you ever said back?" Daisy asked, glaring at Peach's nods. "You never…elaborated? Told him how happy you were to be his 'friend'? Or that you liked him more than you used to?"

"I said those things," Peach said, a little quietly, "but yeah, I only ever really replied with 'I know'. It was easier."

"Easier than saying what?"

"I don't know," she snarled back. "At least it was honest! Now, if I can continue my story…" The gondolier had, at this point, reached the hotel. Grateful, they paid him and headed into the Ca'Shygredo, up to their shared room. All the way, apparently no longer caring about those who may eavesdrop, Peach continued to tell Daisy about her week.

She described Bowser's brief history of his relationship with his dead wife, told Daisy all about running into him in the hallway and how ridiculous she felt, like a high-school girl asking someone to Ladies' Choice. When she told Daisy about Bowser's hints about his ideal gift and how awkward she felt, Peach's childish grin had become so contagious Daisy actually squealed _for_ her.

"By now, we were _totally_ friends. But not buddy-buddy friends. The kind of friend you get so excited to see, you can't sleep. And when you_ do_ see them, your stomach gets into this ridiculous knot and you can't think of anything to say, no matter how many times you rehearsed it before. But then you start talking, and you start touching, and everything is as smooth and warm as butter on a mushroom roll."

"And exactly how many friends do you have like that, Peach?" Daisy laughed.

Instead of answering, Peach just blushed some more. They both sat on Peach's bed, bouncing up and down when she told her about teaching Bowser how to play Pickleball and sitting for hours at the dinner table, just talking. Peach kept using words like "gentleman" and "charming" and "wonderful", words that, if Daisy hadn't heard the context, she would promise could never describe Bowser. But according to Peach, they did, and apparently better than any other words in the language.

Right at the beginning of telling Daisy about Bowser's birthday breakfast, Peach stood up. "I _have_ to show you my ball gown!"

"Your what?"

"My gown- I didn't bring one, but they had one _made_ for me, and it is the prettiest gown you will have ever seen ever!"

Instead of asking to see it once Peach got to the pertinent part of the story, Daisy simply said, "You have it with you and haven't shown it to me yet?"

Peach giggled and pranced over to her closet. Easily separating the nearly identical dresses to the shimmering custom gown, she pulled its hanger off the rack and spun, right along with the dress, towards Daisy again. "Isn't it _gorgeous_?"

"Oh, Peach!" Daisy cooed, standing up and clasping her hands. "I don't even like dresses and this is the most beautiful thing I've seen!"

"Isn't it though?" With the sunlight streaming in the windows, the dress sparkled and glimmered as if it was alive, as if it was dancing itself. "And Daisy, you should have _seen_ Bowser's face when he saw me in it." She flopped down on the bed, squeezing the dress as Daisy sat back down. "First of all, _he_ looked stunning and really, really handsome. Kamek had gotten him this black formal shell, and he did something different with his mane, and he smelled…oh my gosh, he smelled like love itself." She buried her face in the dress and was absolutely overjoyed to realize his must lingered on its fabric. Peach couldn't help but squeal as she smothered her face into the dress more, finally coming up to finish Bowser's reaction. "Dayz, I knew he loved me before then, but when he saw me in this dress, it was like I was his very purpose for being alive and all he ever wanted to do was be with me and love me. And I felt like that, too! It was absolute _magic_!"

Having decided to skip the entirety of Bowser's birthday in favor of the ball, Peach kept going with her story. Her description of the evening was exactly as the ball went from her point of view; it consisted of nothing but Bowser. She never mentioned the food, except how Bowser taught her how to eat it. Her description of their first dance lasted longer than the actual song, getting glassy-eyed about her hands in his, and their feet moving together. The entire time she clutched the dress like her life depended on it.

She talked about their dancing, describing that she never wanted to leave his side, told Daisy all about Bowser's wonderful dance contest, speaking with such pride in him, and even more pride in how he returned to her side right away. Peach's memory of the ball was practically perfect, and she spared very few details. But their private hour or so on the patio, under the stars and all alone, Peach chose to keep private. She certainly told Daisy that it happened, but kept silent about just how close they had been to each other, and how it was the closest she'd ever felt to anyone at all. Maybe it was because Peach didn't want to admit it to herself, but Peach chose to believe it was because the memory was to precious.

She described the last song with exact detail, even singing it to Daisy so she could understand just how "wonderful" it was. And, of course, she told her all about how Bowser was the best father she'd ever seen when he interacted with Lemmy. As Peach had seen a lot of fathers, Daisy took that with a grain of salt.

After a very long sigh, Peach said hurriedly, "there was a lot of stuff that happened the next day. We spent the _entire time_ hanging out around the Darklands, acting like best friends. In fact, sometimes we were literally 'acting' like best friends." She smiled fondly, but brushed almost the entire day aside. "But Daisy, you _have_ to hear what happened afterwards. This was my last day with him, right? And I was feeling pretty…attached. So I…um, Daisy…you need to tell me if this was the right thing or not. I…I asked him…We…"

There was a rapping on the door. Daisy and Peach grabbed for each other and screamed.

"Mama Mia!" Luigi said through the wood, laughter attached. "It's just-a me, Luigi!"

"And-a me, Mario!"

"Oh, um, sorry, let me get the door…" Daisy said, fumbling to stand up. She looked over at Peach, who was staring at her wide-eyed and clutching onto the dress for dear life. She swung the door open, looking at the two brothers as if terrified.

"What's wrong, Daisy?" Luigi asked. "Aren't you-a ready for the carnival?"

"The carnival!" Daisy shrieked. "I…um…" she started backing away awkwardly, looking around and steering herself towards a bowl of fruit perched on a nearby table. "Right. That. We're going to that. But first I…oh look, a pomegranate! Peach said she wanted one of these, right when you were knocking. That's…what we were talking about."

The Mario brothers looked at Daisy oddly as she fumbled for the fruit, throwing it to Peach who didn't even bother trying to catch it. "Let me open it for you!" Daisy yelled, dashing over to Peach. She opened the fruit, aiming it at Peach's arm. Somewhere along her life, Daisy had mastered the art of staining clothing for getaways just like this. An arch of pomegranate juice spurted from the fruit and landed squarely on Peach's forearm glove. "Oh no!" She cried, her voice cracking. "We need to get rid of this stain!" Daisy grabbed her cousin's hand, yanking her off the bed and towards the bathroom with the gown still in tow.

They slammed the bathroom door shut behind them and Daisy yanked the glove off Peach and into the deep sink, turning the cold water on with more force than necessary. She glanced at the bathroom clock's second hand before saying, "We have approximately forty-five seconds before they either get suspicious or tune out the water and overhear us."

"You want me to finish my story in forty-five seconds?" Peach whined.

"No, just answer two questions."

"But Daisy, I want to actually _talk_ to you about this! I don't know what's going on!"

"I know, I know, and we will. But we're running out of time! First question- did you and Bowser ever kiss?"

"What?" Peach stuttered, wringing her gown as her face completely paled. "Why would you…how did you…"

"Answer, quick!"

"Actually yes, I…I kissed him." Peach admitted. She expected Daisy to lunge for her throat, but instead, she seemed to smile. "But not until we landed in the Mushroom Kingdom. It was kind of his present, I think, and I- "

"Second question," Daisy cut off. "Did you ever consider you might be in love with him?"

Peach's mouth dropped open and her mind went absolutely blank. _In love?_ Her thinking was, yet again, cut short by Luigi calling, "Daisy? Are you okay?"

Daisy swore under her breath, looking up at the clock. "Forty-five seconds on the freaking dot. We'll have to finish this-" she dramatically sighed, "later."

"You can't…not after you…" Peach remained in the bathroom after Daisy flung the door open and ran out to Luigi's arms. This situation, apparently, wasn't fazing her at all. She was talking briskly in a voice Peach couldn't understand, and everything seemed a little fuzzy.

"Peach?" Mario asked, stepping into the doorframe. "Let's-a go."

Peach looked up at Mario, putting a hand on her knee. _Love? Love? Could she be in love?_ "Go...oh, the carnival. Listen, I'm feeling a little…light-headed." She sat down on the side of the massive tub, putting her head in her free hand. That wretched word swam around her head, disallowing any distracting thoughts whatsoever. Then, the migraine set in. "I think I need to…take a bath or something."

Daisy released herself from Luigi, pulling him by the hand to the bathroom's doorway. "No, Peachy, I don't think that's a good idea. I think the carnival is exactly what you need." She walked over to Peach and took her hands, pulling her up to stand. "Clear your head. Get distracted. Carnivals are exactly the kind of silly you need right now."

"But…I…" _Love? Love? Love?_

She pulled her over, whispering in Peach's ear, "look, I'm sorry for dropping that bomb on you. Obviously the answer was 'no', and I kind of expected that you _had_ already considered that…possibility. That was pretty selfish of me to ask and possibly ruin your day." She moved her head away and kept holding Peach's hand. "We'll get you to the carnival, put some hearty food in you, and clear off that sea-sickness or whatever is plaguing you."

"Sea-sickness?" Mario asked, a little put-out. "Does that-a mean we have to walk to-a the carnival?"

Luigi smacked his older brother over the head, hissing, "of _course_ that is-a what it means. Give your girl-a-friend a little respect, Mario."

Peach gagged, then, choking on her own bile, started to cough furiously.

Eventually the group left the princess' room and headed down Grand Canal's narrow sidewalks, some walking with more enthusiasm than others. Luigi and Daisy lagged behind Peach and Mario who, at Daisy's less than subtle suggestion, were in a lively debate over the educational merit of history classes. "Daisy," Luigi muttered, "Peach does not-a get sea-sick. But that was-a very real retching. What is wrong?"

Daisy sighed, looping her arm around his. "It's kind of a long story that I don't have all the pieces to yet. I'll explain later, I hope…but for now just avoid using the g-word around her." She paused briefly and added, "or the b-word."

"What is the 'g-word'?" Luigi asked, "…gastrointestinal?"

"What?" Daisy laughed.

"Gourmet guy? Gondola? Gondo_lier_?"

"Stop guessing, crazy!" Daisy laughed again before more seriously, though with a smile, answered in a hushed voice, "girlfriend or boyfriend. Don't use any relationship titles around her for the time being."

Luigi seemed disappointed as he whispered back, "so what am I supposed to call you?"

Daisy smirked and pecked his cheek. "Be creative, big boy."

* * *

**Author's Note: **I like having Daisy and Luigi together c:

So this chapter did not go nearly the way I had originally planned it, especially regarding Peach and Daisy's conversation, which has now altered the entire rest of the story. Those girls! They will NOT settle down; always insisting on writing their own interactions. What jerks. ;) Though I must thank them because now the ending can come even sooner than originally planned. And if you see that as a bad thing, may I remind you this story will have, as of next chapter, officially dragged 50 chapters.

Chapter 50 has big plans, if I can get in everything I want to, and should be absolutely riveting. Even if I don't get in as much as I hope, you _will_ see the return of a character I know at least one of you has sorely missed. As always, I'm shooting for a post in a month, and that might happen, depending on how much distraction I need from finals.

Regardless, I'm very very honored with whoever stuck around to see this update happen and you have my eternal gratitude. Special thanks to juuub who is sort of getting this as a late birthday present...sorry I couldn't do more! And I WILL see you next month, I guarentee it :)

-Razzi


	50. Awkward

**Foreword:**

This is not an excuse, but an explanation: I DID NOT BREAK MY PROMISE! :D I promised "see you next month", meaning I was going to post to ffnet. But I was rudely unclear. Most of you missed it, but I posted a little Christmas oneshot titled "A Koopaling Christmas". And now it's practically St. Patrick's Day because I suck at updating on time, so I'm sure no one is in the mood to read it anyway.

But yeah. I didn't break THAT promise. Even though I'm still terrible at updating.

Confession time: My friend roped me into a very, very addicting facebook RP for the glee fandom, so I haven't been spending ALL of my freetime writing. BUT I did finish this, so...yay! Now, chapter 50 isn't the BEST chapter, but I did get in everything I wanted to include in it...therefore, it's a little long. Sorry about that, too.

I still don't own anything. And it's a good thing, because if I owned Bowser or any of these people, they would probably die of starvation from my lack of attention. I still love you all though, I'm so sorry I'm so terrible. (love love)

* * *

"I don't see how this is going to work," Rocco seethed, his voice picked up from his nearly invisible headset clipped to his sunglasses. "It's not like this city is exactly _small_."

"She's a human in a big, poofy, pink dress!" Larry snarled back. "How can you miss her?" Larry and all of his other siblings had discovered that, even after only one day apart from Peach, they were missing her terribly. They had all crowded into the Outside Communications room, staring at the video screen that portrayed Rocco's eyesight.

Of course that was nothing compared to Bowser, who would lock himself away from everyone else for hours at a time, then reemerge in a whirlwind of productivity, refusing to acknowledge that the week even happened until some mysterious, unexpected trigger word would launch him back into depressed silence for another few hours.

"There are a lot of humans here. It's a dang tourist city. And it happens to be REALLY BIG."

"Then, like, get to higher ground!" Wendy instructed.

"You make it sound so easy," Rocco snarled back sarcastically. "This city is freaking weird. The buildings are all shorter than five stories and there aren't any roads. I don't know how to move, let alone find a _princess_. And even if I could see her, I don't know how I would get to her. No one is going to magically give me directions right into Peach's lap…"

"Are you asking about Princess Peach?" a very short shy-guy asked, jumping up and down in front of Rocco. He looked down at the little guy and raised an eyebrow.

"…yes…why…?"

"I saw her!" he squeaked, "I saw her at the carnival with my daughter! I'm on my way home to get her Peach doll to sign!"

"…what carnival?" Overeagerly, the shy-guy ran to an advertisement posted on the side of a streetlight. Rocco read aloud, "Annual Grand Canal Carnival: Come celebrate the summer in style! Games, activities, blah, blah, blah…runs the entire season of summer, blah, blah, blah…located four blocks west and two blocks north from this point." He backed up and blinked a little.

Smoothly, Ludwig asked, "You were saying?"

"I'm going, I'm going," Rocco growled back.

"Crazy man who talks to himself!" the shy-guy chirped as Rocco started to march west.

"WHAT?"

"Admission is half-off if you buy pasta at the ticket booth!"

"Good to know," he muttered before setting off at a quicker pace than the shy-guy's legs could handle. The walk took longer than Rocco would have liked, as most bridges had to lower themselves before he could cross the canal streets, but it wasn't long before he found the giant rides, bright colors, and kitschy music of the carnival. "Alright, koopalings, I'm at the carnival thing."

"Chyeah, Captain Obvious. We kin see er'rting you can see," Roy snarled. "Yer supposed teh _not_ look like 'crazy man who talks to hi'sself'. Yer supposed teh not draw attention teh yourself."

"I'm _so sorry_," he snapped back before his turn to purchase admission. Plate of pasta in tow, Rocco joined the rest of the carnival. He smiled, memories flashing before his eyes of all the carnivals he used to attend as a little boy in the northern Darklands. They were different, of course…duller colors, scents closer to deep-frying than roasted tomatoes, and many more horror-oriented rides.

He almost wanted to throw off his sunglasses and just run to the Ferris wheel, cut everyone else in line, and never get off of it. However, he also wanted to have a job to go home to, so instead, he began the search for Princess Peach. The carnival was _massive_, stretching blocks and blocks, boards and enormous planks covering the canals below. Suspiciously enough, the whirligig wasn't even stationed over solid ground.

Getting to work, Rocco peered around for any signs of Princess Peach. According to the koopalings, she would most likely be with Mario, Luigi, and Princess Daisy. They shouldn't have been a very difficult group to spot, but it seemed like everyone at the carnival was brightly-colored and of exotic species. They weren't on any rides, as far as he could tell, and Rocco was searching the rides thoroughly. Very, very thoroughly.

He wouldn't have found them anywhere near rides, however. At the moment, Peach, Daisy, Luigi, and Mario were hopping from food stand to food stand, trying to find something for Peach to eat to alleviate her "sea-sickness". But Peach was adamantly not hungry.

"Peach," Daisy snarled, finally grabbing her shoulders, "You _have_ to eat something."

"What's the point?" she whined in a little lower of a voice. "You and I both know this isn't real sea-sickness…"

"And you and I _also_ both know that we can't handle this issue in the middle of the carnival. But I _do_ know that you need to put food in your stomach, stop going to insane, and spend some more time with Mario. Figure things out on a full stomach. You just spent a nonstop week with you-know-who; you can't possibly think subjectively right now."

Peach nodded, still looking a little sick.

"Peach, stop thinking about this. Eat. Be with Mario. Try and see if you can feel it out the way you felt before you went on vacation. Don't consider this 'figuring things out' at all. Okay?"

She nodded again and swallowed. "I'll get some funnel cake…and a pasta-dog, I guess. I don't understand how those are supposed to taste remotely good, but it's worth a try if the locals love them so much."

Daisy grinned and slapped Peach, hard, on the shoulder. "You're already sounding better." They got in line, talking about all the weird foods they had eaten over the years, almost not hungry at all by the time they got to the front of the queue. Peach and Daisy got their food anyway, returning to the boys who had piles of carnival pasta on their respective plates.

They talked about a whole lot of nothing, somehow managing to cheer her up enough to stop thinking about Bowser all together. She was completely distracted by their silly little stories and walks down memory lane.

Then, of course, Luigi had to mention how romantic it would be to go on a Ferris wheel ride. Daisy totally agreed, pulling them all along, and not noticing Peach's distraught expression until too late. "This is good, Peach. You can talk." That was all she managed to say before bounding back to sit next to Luigi in their slowly rising car.

"What the crap is this?" Bowser snarled, making each and every one of his children shriek in terror. "What are you watching?"

They started to cower and groan, knowing this was a _terrible_ time for Bowser to walk in. Once Rocco had FINALLY found the humans at the food stand, they were pleased to see a rather moody Peach, making all sorts of assumptions and pretending they could see into her mind. Of course, they were rather off in their guesses of what she was thinking, but her displeasure was still wonderful to behold.

Bowser was far, far away on the other side of the palace, but when it was dinner time and he was completely alone in the dining room (especially considering it was bacon-wrapped steak day), he knew something was up. It didn't take long to find his missing children and have the terrible timing Bowser normally did, finding them right when Peach was laughing and smiling _right_ at Mario. Right in the middle of forgetting all about Bowser and their time together.

"What," he repeated, seething, "the crap…is this?"

"It's….um…." Larry started to shake as they all watched Bowser slowly figure things out.

First he saw Peach, and his eyes lit up. He was still scowling at his children for missing dinner and spying without letting him in on it, but even the scowl started to fade as he looked at his beloved, just as beautiful as when she left the day before.

Then he saw Mario, and he was furious again. Why did _he_ get to spend time with that woman? _He_ didn't appreciate her, _he_ wouldn't give an entire kingdom's safety just to spend time with her, _he_ didn't understand what it meant to really, truly love Princess Peach.

And then…he saw her laugh with him. Smile at him. _Lightly freaking touch his ugly, puny sleeve_. Like she was _flirting_. What the crap! She was supposed to be laughing and smiling and touching _Bowser_! Wasn't it bad enough for him that she wasn't going to be doing that anymore? Oh, no, she was going to be doing that. Just to _another man_. One far less deserving.

His face went stone-cold as he stared at the screen.

"Um…Daddy?" Wendy asked, quietly. "We can…turn it off. And go to dinner."

"I thought your father wasn't supposed to see this?" Rocco asked through the speakers.

"He was not supposed to indeed," Ludwig sighed. "We feared this reaction may come if he stepped in at an inopportune moment, just as he has."

"How could there be an _opportune moment_?" Bowser roared, his voice unexpectedly getting so loud that the speakers started to provide screeching feedback. "She is WITH HIM. FREAKING MARIO. THE MAN I HATE. Know why I hate him? He steals my woman, kills my subjects, killed my _wife,_ your _mother_, and paints me as the villain ALL THE TIME. Okay, yeah, I'm the bad guy. I LOVE BEING THE BAD GUY. But sometimes I want a BREAK. Is that so much to ask?" Bowser roared and ripped a computer out of its socket, thrusting it to the ground and making all his children scream and crowd together defensively.

He stared at them, his eyes totally on fire. "I love her! He doesn't even _know_ her! He spent HIS ENTIRE LIFE with her and HE HASN'T EVEN PROPOSED. I proposed the second time I MET her! He goes around, high and mighty, and everyone just goes batty insane over him. 'Oh, Mario, you're so handsome. Oh, Mario, you're so talented. Oh, Mario, you're _so_ _human and so the marrying type and so physically capable of having my children_.' Screw Mario!" He tore another computer out of its socket and threw it against a wall, shattering the screens of four monitors around it. "No matter WHAT I DO, no matter if I kidnap her and threaten her life or if I sit patiently for a week and convince myself she might even _love_ me…All he has to do is EXIST and he WINS. I would kill that freak-"

Bowser started to pant, hunched over and clenching his fists, then slowly started to cool down. "But if he was dead, she would be miserable. Even if she doesn't love him…and she has _no reason_ to love him…she would be miserable." Bowser sat down on the floor, curling his tail around him and all the shattered pieces of electronics. The koopalings just stared at him, wide-eyed. Rocco, unable to see anything at all, awkwardly cleared his throat. "I don't want her to be miserable," Bowser said, choking on his own voice. "I don't want her to feel like this."

"Feel like what, King Dad?" Lemmy asked, somehow unfazed by everything that had just unfolded before him.

"Feel like the only point of living is loving, and the only point of loving…is dying. Like every day you exist for one other person, but they exist for so many other people that you don't matter. Feel like your life is a freaking lie, because she _is _your life, and everything about _her_ is…a lie."

"Oh, Daddy," Wendy muttered, sitting down next to her father. She put her hand on his arm and looked into his eyes, her own swimming in tears. "It's not like that. She really does love you, I just know it. Maybe _she_ doesn't, but-"

"Go away, Wendy."

"Daddy, you can't keep this all to yourself. You have to talk it ou-"

"_I said go away, Wendy. _It's dinnertime anyway." He looked away from his daughter, not wanting her, or any of his children, to see him cry. Bowser wasn't supposed to cry- ever. Especially not over such a girly, whiny emotion as love and heartbreak. "I'll come join you guys in a second."

"Rocco," Iggy started as he stood up, "we'll set the next stuff to record. You're not off the hook." He turned off the monitor and joined his siblings in their awkward shuffle out of the room, ignoring their father, reduced to a literal shell as he crawled inside.

Back at Grand Canal, Rocco swore under his breath. "This is still recording," he said out loud, "so I want you all to know that while Bowser was exploding, the humans decided to go on a Ferris wheel ride. I know, romantic and all that garbage. But Peach looked…less than excited."

xxxx0o0o0o0o0o0o0xxxx

That was an understatement.

Peach sat uncomfortably with Mario, remembering how bad he was at starting conversations. He could hold his own in one, if the subject matter interested him enough, but Mario much preferred the "easy silence" type of togetherness. His silence _used_ to be easy and almost never awkward, but Peach couldn't stand it now. The silence just spoke volumes.

When she was with Bowser, they could talk for hours and hours, not even noticing. Just comfortable around each other's voices, opinions, jokes, and laughs. His low, crooning, and just slightly scratchy voice melted beautifully into her chipper, crisp, giggly one. And then when they didn't talk, when it was just him looking at her, feeling her presence, holding her in his arms, it seemed just as natural as those hours of conversation.

Being alone with Mario was different. Talking to him felt like a chore, like something she was expected to do. And he wasn't exactly touchy-feely to warm up the silence. She wasn't a novelty to look at lovingly unless he had just saved her skin, and as he leaned over the Ferris wheel, looking at the view with her, it seemed much more like they were two people looking at the same view out of consequence, not two people looking at the same view _together_.

Shoot. She wasn't supposed to be thinking about Bowser.

"So…Mario…" He turned to look at her, his full attention on Peach. "Do you…do you have any good plans for this week?" Forcibly, Peach remembered what she was feeling before she left for the Darklands. She wanted to be with Mario forever. She wanted him to propose to her on this trip. She wanted to marry him.

…what was she thinking? Forever with…Mario?

_No, Peach. No, _she chastised herself. _That's the normal, healthy thing to think. I must have thought that for a very good reason._

"Good-a plans?" Mario replied. He shrugged and looked over at the city again.

"You just…want to spend it being together?"

But Mario was not the romantic Bowser was. "Uh, si. You, and-a me, and-a Daisy, and-a Luigi. It's a Mario Party!" He flashed a grin at her and Peach couldn't help rolling her eyes. Of course, she immediately regretted it afterwards. "What?"

What was she supposed to say? _"Oh, nothing, Mario. You just constantly fail the tests I lay before you, that's all. Next time, try a little harder to remind me why I'm supposed to be in love with you."_ Yeah, that wasn't going to work. "Sorry, it's nothing. I just thought…it's the most romantic city in the world. Maybe you had something in mind for us?"

"Oh! Right! We will-a take a gondola ride." Mario smiled at her, genuinely proud of his idea.

Peach smiled back. "When?"

"Um…I don't-a know. When we have-a nothing else to do?"

_Aaaand strike two._ "So romance is 'when we have nothing else to do' now?"

"When was it not?"

Peach sputtered a laugh, doing her absolute best to keep it in, but failing. It was like Mario was _trying_ to convince her they shouldn't be together. "Mario, when you love someone, you're supposed to _want_ to do things with them. Alone, privately, to make yourselves feel good. Because it feels good to spend time with someone you love." She said everything so matter-of-fact, not even once thinking about how good it felt to be with Bowser and how that may relate, that Mario bit his lip.

All he said was "Oh," followed by an awkward "I'm-a sorry?"

"Don't worry about it," Peach replied breathily. "Let's just enjoy the view and take this week one day at a time, okay?"

They were quiet for a while again, easing into the familiar silence that being with Mario always brought. "Oh, Peach!" Mario said suddenly, making her jump a little. "I thought of-a something. We have another dinner with-a my parents tonight." He smiled, clearly pleased that he had 'planned' something good for their trip.

She smiled back, feeling like she was giving the same smile princesses gave to their adoring fans whose names they would never fully learn. "Wonderful. I love your parents." She leaned back into the Ferris wheel's seat and stared at the back of Mario's head, his hair and hat fluttering a little. She blinked, and for that second of having her eyes closed, she saw a red mane fluttering in his place.

Peach groaned. Apparently, getting Bowser out of her head was going to be a lot harder than it seemed.

And it really shouldn't be hard.

It's not like Daisy was right.

It's not like she actually is in love with him.

No way.

xxxx0o0o0o0o0o0o0xxxx

"Where is Toadsworth?" King Toadstool asked, looking up from his papers with his reading glasses nearly falling off his nose.

Surtain T. jumped at his sudden comment, after apparently having been napping standing up. "Toadsvorth, zire?" he asked, his accent thick.

"Yes, that is who I asked for," he repeated kindly, setting down his pen. "Rereading this, I realize I have to talk to him about a very crucial matter."

"I vill find him, zire." Surtain T. marched out of the office and returned within five minutes, Toadsworth trailing behind.

"Good afternoon, siah. Wot seems to be the problem?"

"Unfortunately," he began, removing his glasses and looking at Toadsworth steely, "it's you."

"Me? What in jelly's name are you talking about, siah?"

"I have here a letter from a certain Miss Toadstool, apologizing for what she names an 'unprofessional crush'. She continues to go on in this letter about how she is unfit to even work in the castle and includes a paragraph where she _understands if resignation is desired_. Can you explain this, Toadsworth?"

"I…don't know why the old gel thinks our little tiff is worth throwing in the ole' towel, but I do believe she is talking about her infatuation with Mario." Toadsworth looked like he felt _extremely_ awkward, shifting his cane from wrinkled hand to wrinkled hand.

"And why, exactly, did you need to have a 'tiff' over that?"

"Well, it warn't _truly_ a tiff, siah. It was moh…I found it a bit funny, y'see. That our little gel has a hankering for Mistah Mario."

"So you laughed at her? Embarrased her enough that she now thinks herself nworthy of working in our castle?"

"Well, I didn't _mean_ to-"

"Toadsworth, excuse my interrupting, but you of all gentlemen should know that Toadette is a very sensitive toad. She takes everything you say to heart. She has a _wonderful_ iron grip on herself in public forums, and does her job fantastically. But when Toadette is the one protecting Toadette, she can't do it. She can't believe in herself enough to. We can't have you misleading her into thinking she isn't worthy of her position here."

"I understand I should not have laughed, siah, but she _was_ being ridiculous."

"How so? By having a crush on someone else often in the castle that is most likely out of her league? May I remind you, Toadsworth, that our own Mario himself _started_ here as a plumber after the boo we hired finally retired to Booville? Don't you remember how he saw her, fell _hard_ into a crush with her, and _that_ is why he was so eager to rescue her those first few times? Mario and Peach started out as an 'unprofessional crush', and look where they are now."

"Are you saying that we should…encourage the little lass…to take Mario for _herself_?"

"I'm saying there is no reason to judge her for a crush. If it makes her work harder to stay at the castle and remain closer to the object of her affection, all the better! Crushes fade, Toadsworth, but hurt feelings can linger for years."

"She went too far, siah. She was insinuating that Peach and _Bowser_ had a thing. Can you honestly tell me that's not too far?"

"Obviously, they do _not_ have a thing, and that was simply her wishful thinking. And how is wishful thinking harmful? We all know that Bowser is attracted to my daughter in more ways than anyone should be, and that is not a healthy relationship for her at all. This is common knowledge. It makes sense that if she wants Mario to herself, she would find this to be an easy fix." The king chuckled, moving his papers around on his desk to better organize them. "Rest assured, that easy fix is not going to happen anytime soon. Peach doesn't have an ounce of appreciation for King Bowser. And honestly," he looked straight at Toadsworth, a twinkle in his eye, "I think Toadette's encouragement for the Darklands Relations group was brilliant. She _should_ appreciate him a tad more. I certainly don't like the koopa, but I respect his ruling abilities. We have things we can learn from his success, even if they are all laced with evil intentions."

Toadsworth cleared his throat awkwardly. "So…I s'pose an apology is in order, right, siah?"

"That would be correct, Toadsworth," King Toadstool agreed, nodding. "And next time…remember your place. It's never appropriate to laugh at someone for what their heart is doing. Just give it time."

xxxx0o0o0o0o0o0o0xxxx

Dinner isn't normally awkward. Not for Peach, not for Mario, not for Bowser, and certainly not for the koopalings. Peach is a _princess_; she's used to dining in less-than-pleasant situations and with people she'd rather not dine with. Eating dinner at the home of Mario and Luigi's charming parents should be the most comfortable experience possible, especially considering how easy it was on their very first meeting. Mario is simply always happy to be around food, and nothing could bring him down; Bowser is very similar. He gets grumpy, furious, and upset, but the right food can make almost any problem seem trivial. And when the koopalings are faced with bacon-wrapped steak, they don't even know what problems _are_.

But the Powers that Be apparently didn't want dinner to be normal for anyone that night.

Papa Mario, Mama Mario, Luigi, and Peach loved it, of course. Mama made a special soup, and they told stories together of crazy relatives who ate too much, sang too much, and worked too much.

Mario had nothing to add. Peach just kept thinking of _another_ crazy family of individuals who did everything too much…but didn't dare say a word.

Bowser's table, however, was silent. It was too much to bear for Bowser. "Say something, someone," he ordered with a grumble.

"You were crying in the room for no reason?"

Bowser unintentionally gripped his fork so tightly, it bent right out of shape. "Never mind. Go back to being freaky silent freaks. And never, _ever_ mention that again." He didn't need to ask twice…but that didn't make anything less awkward.

Peach was feeling just as awkward. She looked over at Mario and tried, really, honestly tried to find _something_ for them to talk about. Obviously he wasn't going to join the conversation about Grandma Mia's garlic-chip cookies anytime soon, but that seemed to be simply because his soup was interesting him _so_ much.

She turned to Daisy. Daisy had a strange smile on her face that couldn't possibly relate to the conversation, as Papa Mario, who actually _was_ listening, seemed disgusted. Peach looked a little closer and noticed Daisy's hand was…not on her own lap. Peach shifted in her seat, honestly jealous of Luigi and Daisy, as inappropriate as it was to use his parents' house for such interaction.

She looked at Mario again and considered…what would _he_ do if she were to put her hand on his thigh like that? Or even more innocently than Daisy had it placed? She was having trouble imagining it, but it certainly wouldn't be that exciting.

What she _could_ imagine was putting her hand on Bowser's thigh. During some dinner, with some other awkward conversation that she didn't feel like listening to, just putting her little hand on his thigh would probably distract him from everything else that was happening in the world. Peach smirked, in spite of herself. Oh, there would never be an awkward dinner with Bowser.

They would talk for hours, just like they did last week, even long after their plate had been cleared. And if they couldn't talk because of the company, it still wouldn't be awkward. Just being there with him would be pleasant.

Daisy jabbed Peach hard in the side. She woke up from her daydream and stared at Daisy, who was glaring and jerked her head towards Mama Mario. Mama Mario smiled and repeated what Peach had apparently not heard. "Can I talk to you in-a the kitchen? I would-a like some of your famous cake recipes." She smiled sweetly and Peach, still a little absent from the conversation, nodded and got up and followed the short woman to the kitchen where they could not be overheard.

"Peach, you know I love-a you, si?"

"Of course I do, Mama Mario," Peach answered, very confused by Mama Peach's actions.

"I am not blind, _ciumachella_. I see you and-a my son, and I see your face with him." Peach swallowed thickly. Was she thinking they were going to become engaged, like how the week was supposed to go, and didn't approve? Mama Mario continued, grabbing one of Peach's hands. "And more than-a anything, I would love for you to consider me like your own _mamma_. But Peach, like I did-a say, I am not blind."

"What do you mean, Mama Mario?"

She kindly stroked Peach's face with the back of her hand. "You do not-a love him, do you?"

"Everyone is asking me that lately," Peach breathed. Mama Mario chuckled, but just warmly gave Peach time to consider her answer. She looked at Mama Mario, really looked at her. This was the woman with the heart-warming love story. The woman who had brought up two boys; one madly in love with Daisy, the other…unreadable. She had been comparing Mario and Bowser all day, even though she wasn't supposed to. She didn't _exactly_ know what love was, but she knew that if she _didn't_ love Bowser, she CERTAINLY didn't love Mario. "What…do _you_ define love as?"

"You can't define it, _ciumchella_. _Amore_ is different for every person. And being in love is different for every two people. For me, love is-a waking up and seeing the sunrise, wanting to see it every single day with Adolfo next to me. For Luigi, it is wanting to be the person he is-a too afraid to be, just so every day he and Daisy are happy. For you…_non io so_." She shrugged, but smiled sofly.

"…I don't know what love is to me, either." She swallowed, and stared Mama Peach hard in the face. "But I know it's not Mario. I-…I'm sorry, Mama Mario. I _do_ love him, just not…"

"No excuses, _bambina_. I knew you did-a not love him. And I know he does-a not love you."

"Did he tell you that?"

"No, but raising that _allocco_ for eighteen years…I think that I-a know a thing or-a two." She winked, then pulled Peach in for a hug. "I never want you to be my _nuora_, my daughter-in-law. But Peach…" She pulled away from the hug so she could look into Peach's bright blue eyes once more. "I hope you-a know, you are always my _figlia_. My daughter."

Dinner was surprisingly _less_ awkward after Peach had finally admitted to herself (and to Mama Mario) that she was _not_ in love with Mario. She was able to actually listen to the conversations around her, to add things, to laugh at their jokes, and to be involved enough even to make up for Mario, still fiddling with his soup like there was nothing but him and the soup.

xxxx0o0o0o0o0o0o0xxxx

They all left after a few hours, Peach kissing Mama Mario lightly on both cheeks, as she whispered into Peach's ear "Don't-a worry, this will-a be our little secret for now."

They returned to the hotel, Daisy and Luigi holding back. Peach didn't even bother thinking about doing the same with Mario…were they even a couple?...and wished him goodnight with a hug.

But Peach didn't feel like sleeping.

Instead, she sat on the edge of her bed, thinking. Unfortunately for her, the room wasn't about to let her just _think_. The old fashioned clock was ticking away obnoxiously and whoever had the next room over was watching some movie that was apparently _very _funny. She sighed and laid down on her bed, still fully clothed. It was useless. She couldn't truly think in here. All she _could _think about was putting her hand on Bowser's thigh, which was a pointless thing to think about. It wasn't like it had ever actually _happened_ the way she kept imagining it. She tried to think about things that _had_ happened, tried to figure out if she, as Daisy hinted, may have fallen in love with King Bowser Koopa. She couldn't have, right?

He was…_tick, tock, tick, tock_…a monster, who loved nothing more than kidnapping her so he could…um, so he could…_her hand inching along his thigh_…he was a terrible creature that didn't care about…_tick, tick, tick, tick_…her entire life, he had done nothing but_…tock, tock, tock, tock…_ and he was going to…if they were ever actually _together_, he would…_his scales tighten when he tenses, they would do that if she had her hand on his thigh…_she was supposed to marry a good man who could let her be queen and…_tick, tock, tick, tock…_

Peach sat up, her eyes lit on fire with frustration. She was going _outside_. Even if it was louder there with more distractions, somehow, she'd be able to clear her head. Daisy still hadn't gotten in, so Peach left a note on the bed, promising to return soon and that she had her cell-phone on in case there was a problem.

When she got outside, she realized just how truly _stunning_ Grand Canal was at night. Lanterns were glittering every which way, and since there weren't any cars in their streets, just gliding boats and gondolas, the only sounds came from the rustle of the crowd, the gentle conversation, and the music from restaurants and gondoliers.

She walked alongside the river, trying to figure out exactly what to figure out first, when a voice called out to her, sweet and clear. "Ciao, bella!"

Peach spun towards the river, recognizing the gondolier nearby as the same who had taken her and Daisy home from their shopping earlier that morning. "And-a what are you doing this fine evening, bella? All by yourself tonight, are you?"

She smiled graciously at him. "Yes. Just taking an evening stroll…I need to think some things out."

"_Amore_?" he suggested, stroking backwards to stay at her pace.

"Yes, actually."

"Ahhh," he sighed, kissing his fingers dramatically. "It is what keeps so many of us a-walking the streets at night. When you are thinking of just-a you and another spending forever together, it-a helps to think of-a just you first. Si?" Peach nodded. "Bella, would you like to talk about it with an old gondolier who has-a spent many-a, _many-a_ years with lovers in my gondola? Free of charge for my little bella-donna."

Peach considered it for a second. _Obviously_, he spoke wonderful English, so he had certainly heard most of the conversation from the morning. And it's not like she had figured anything out on her own; it had been over a week and she had _no_ idea what Bowser meant to her. "As long as you accept my apology for my cousin. Thinking you didn't know English, I mean."

He waved his hand, brushing the concern away. "Eh, it is nothing, bella. Come climb aboard and tell me of your-a woes."

She got on the boat and stared up at the gondolier, shoving them back into the steady flow of the river. "You heard most of it, I presume?"

He chuckled. "Admittedly, _si_. It was a lovely story, bella. And you seem to be-a very confused."

"How do you know if it's love?" She asked, totally straight forward.

"Ahhh, the eternal question. It has-a been asked and answered and re-asked and re-answered since the beginning of-a time. It has no one answer, bella." She groaned. "Tell me about this-a koopa you may love."

"I don't know if I do," she added unnecessarily. "I only started seriously…considering him as an individual…for a week. Before that, I thought he was…crude, and brash, and boarish, and evil, and monstrous, and….well, practically the opposite of how I see him now."

"What changed, bella?"

She leaned back and stared up at the sparkling heavens. "I got to actually _know_ him. Got to realize that was all a façade that he puts up to protect himself. He's sweet, and caring, and a wonderful father. And he loves me, and he's gentle with me, and he makes me feel…safe. Which is deliciously ironic, since I used to be scared to even be anywhere near him."

"That was-a not my question," the gondolier said quietly, making Peach sit straight up. "Those things are opinions. What-a _changed_, bella? Why do you think this now and not before?"

"What changed?" Peach asked, a little confused still. She bit her lip, thinking. _Something_ certainly had changed. Something had changed to make her actually _allow_ herself to think these things. "My heart," she muttered. "My heart changed."

The gondolier seemed to be glowing underneath his mask. "Why?"

She couldn't answer that. She had started paying attention because she was trying to be a 'good princess'- that was easy. But that wasn't why she had had a total change of heart.

Sensing her inability (or lack of desire, at the very least) to answer, the gondolier pressed another question. "Do you think that-a you will always think these-a new thoughts about him?"

_That_ question was answerable. "Yes," she replied, assuredly. "I will always think that about Bowser. And I want to always think that about him, because it's the truth."

"Even when you are-a married to someone else?"

"I-…what?"

"Can you see yourself with-a someone else?"

A faceless man entered Peach's thoughts. He was human, he was as tall as her, and they had three little, faceless children holding their hands. But it was cold. And seemed wrong. It wasn't _her_ family- her family was holding hands with an overeager giant of a koopa and eight little koopalings, totally misbehaving, but still loving their parents. _Their parents_. "No," she answered calmly, "I can't."

"Think about your week," he suggested, easing them farther down the river.

She didn't need to be asked twice. She sat comfortably in the gondola, replaying moments from her week. She thought about that silly dance competition, running with Bowser down the halls of the big hotel, sitting in his cowncopter as they moved from city to city. She thought about spending time with the koopalings, spending time with the workers of the Palace, and thinking about how both their faces would light up when they returned to each other. She thought about that night where they slept in each other's arms, she thought about their first kiss. And she _definitely_ thought about the fact that it didn't necessarily need to be their last.

After nearly thirty minutes of the gondolier quietly crooning, giving Peach a soundtrack to her reel of memories, he cleared his throat. "One more question, bella." She looked up at him and he repeated, "Why did-a your heart change."

"Because," Peach breathed, her face slowly spreading into a smile. She felt warm from the tip of her toes to the top of her hair. Everything was beautiful, everything made sense, and everything was new. "I fell in love with him."

"Did you?"

She smiled, pulling her knees up to her face and squeezing them. "Yes," she laughed, not even meaning to. Her throat was swollen and her hands were hot, but she had _never_ felt more beautiful or more joyful. "I'm in love with Bowser."

* * *

**Author's Note: **FINALLY. TOOK YOU LONG ENOUGH, PRINCESS. TOOK YOU NEARLY FIVE YEARS.

Speaking of five years- my goal is to post 51 on CoH's fifth birthday (marking it as basically the most pathetic fanfiction this poor website has ever seen). Therefore, it'll probably be a pretty dang short chapter.

I'm getting SO CLOSE to the end of the story that it's getting hard for me to figure out how to wrap everything up. I'm going to be rude and enlist your help- besides my rereading of this tome, if there are any storylines or characters you think need to be revisited or wrapped up, please point them out. I don't want any Checkhov's guns laying around when we get to "The End".

I hope you patient, patient, patient insane people liked this chapter. And I hope you realize how much I really do, honestly, love all of you. Thank you for sticking with me C:

-Razzi


	51. Fish in the Sea

**Foreword:**So. Hi. Look who's NOT dead. C: I'm not going to even bother with excuses this chapter. The closest thing I have to an excuse is that I had this thing almost done, 14 pages in, when I lost EVERYTHING. But besides that, It's been over a year, and the fact that some of you have been worried, trying to get in touch, are still thinking about this at ALL is...absolutely mindblowing. I've cried over it more than once, y'all don't know how much you touch me. As such, this chapter and my return ("Return", even though we're literally at the end. TOOK ME LONG ENOUGH, EH?) are dedicated to those of you who've stuck with me and tried to pull me back into writing. Reyairia, Cathy, my mom (mom, if you were serious about reading this tome...hi), and especially Mikari get the biggest nods. :) And to EVERYONE, including those of you who completely forgot about this story but never really took it off alert and are like "wtf is going on", I'm SO sorry. But I AM going to finish this. Y'all deserve that...and so, so much more, but. It's really the least I can do. So, without further ado, here's the penultimate chapter of Change of Heart! If it seems rushed, it's because we're at the end of the slope, and that always goes faster!

* * *

Both having the afternoon off, Kammy and Kamek were walking the Darkland halls in animated discussion. When they spent their time helping each other with the workload instead of making it harder on each other, things got done a _lot_ faster. And Wendy was surprisingly helpful, giggling madly whenever she saw them together and apparently taking their job as nanny. "Just let me be your flower-girl!" was her only request which, of course, landed her under the angry point of both Kammy and Kamek's wand. After spending the rest of that day as a orchid, she learned to keep those kind of comments to herself.

And so for the rest of the afternoon, with Wendy tending to her siblings and the empire in fairly good order, the magikoopas were free to do whatever they chose.

Genially, Kamek swug the door open wide. Unable to hold a smile, Kammy opened her mouth to say something when a rouge birdie flew at her from inside the room. Howling, she jumped out of the way. "Are you trying to kill me?" she snarled, eyes blazing.

Kamek's own eyes bugged out as he dipped his head into the pickleball room. Birdies were flying every direction, roars and grunts drowning out the loud smack of Bowser's racket or the blasts of the automatic birdie-deploying machine. "Sire!" Kamek shouted, ducking down as another birdie ricochets in his direction.

Still, Bowser didn't stop, just roared, "Get out, nut-brain!" and angrily smacked a few more volleys.

"Your awfulness, you must stop_!_" Kamek wailed, covering his head with his hands as the missiles fly around him.

"Oh, _seriously_, Kamek," Kammy snarled, pushing past him and pointing her wand at the machine. Shapes shot at it, shutting off the machine and ending the volleys. She waved her wand again, stilling all the birdies still ricocheting around the room and dropping them dead to the floor.

None of the magic in her wand could have stopped Bowser's anger though, and he threw his racket down with a roar. "What in the name of Kamek's smelly underpit made you do that, you flea-bitten rat-faced hag?" He stormed towards them, flame sparking off his tongue.

"You're an idiot and I hate you," Kamek hissed up at Kammy, tugging at her robes from his hunched position. "And let it be known that my last words are _you're an idiot and I hate you!_"

Ignoring him, Kammy put her hands on her hips and stared up at Bowser, unmoved by his display of aggression. "You can hurt me all you want, Oh Violent One, but that's not going to make your problem go away anymore than denting all of Princess Peach's birdies is."

Bowser tore the net down, continuing his slow, heavy march towards the magikoopas. "It's not like she's ever gonna play here again, Maggot-Breath!" he roared, emotion threatening to enter his voice. "You didn't see that stupid video. She's happy with that idiot, ugly plumber and doesn't freaking care about me anymore!"

Kammy rolled her eyes, tugging Kamek to stand up next to her. "That's not true, your vileness," she reprimanded. Nudging Kamek hard, she snarled, "Come on, old man! Agree with me!"

Still technically behind Kammy and protecting himself from any of Bowser's aggression, Kamek nodded. "Kammy's right for once. There's no way Peach doesn't care about you anymore. She was practically head-over-heels for you last week!"

Bowser stopped a few yards away from Kammy and Kamek, breathing hard. "You didn't see it," he repeated in a defeated growl. "She was laughing and happy and garbage like that. She loves Mario. It's always gonna be stupid Mario who wins the Princess."

"Oh, for evil's sake, Bowser," Kamek drawled, rolling his eyes magnificently. "Sometimes when I hang out with your punk kids I laugh and feel happy and 'garbage like that'. Does that mean I'm in _love_ with any of them? Does that mean I'd rather spend my life looking after your snively kids than bossing around this old hag?" He gestured to Kammy with his thumb, raising an eyebrow at Bowser and fiercely ignoring Kammy's eyes. Yeah, he'd basically just made a giant confession about his feelings, but that didn't mean he had to _own up_ to it.

"I wouldn't wanna do either," Bowser replied, slight amusement in his tone. "My kids suck and Kammy's a rotten bag of tomatoes."

"That wasn't his point," Kammy said, her eyes still searching Kamek for any cracks in his defenses. "He means that just because Peach isn't absolutely miserable with Mario doesn't mean she wouldn't rather be with you anyway." Unable to get anything more than a fleeting glance from her superior, Kammy turned to face Bowser again. "Your problem is that, when it comes to Peach, everything's always been so black-and-white for you. She liked Mario; she was happy with him, giving him kisses and calling for his rescue. She didn't like you; she cursed you and yelled at you to set her free. Those moments of getting along with you were far and few between. But Bowser, guess what? That doesn't mean you and Mario have switched places.

"In case you didn't notice, you're still you, even now that Peach actually likes you. In all likelihood, Mario's still Mario, too. Which means she has no reason to suddenly start hating him."

Kamek nodded, stepping a little closer to the Koopa King. "You can be friends with someone and love someone else, Sire. What about your first wife? Weren't you friends with her, even though you were in love with Peach?"

Running his claws through his mane, Bowser sighed loudly. "I _guess_ so, yeah." He chewed on his lip, staring over the magikoopas. "So you think I...I still have a chance?"

Kammy and Kamek nodded in unison, Kammy asking, "You didn't see her kissing him, did you?"

Bowser shook his head, a smug smile slowly forming. "But she _did_ kiss _me_."

Kammy smiled widely. There was the over-confident king she knew. "And why wouldn't Princess Peach love you?"

"She must," Bowser agreed, his toothy grin filling out his face. "Peach is way too smart to not love me."

"Exactly right, your smarminess," Kamek said with a laugh. He pointed his wand at the torn net, repairing it and sending the birdies all flying into the equipment bin. "Now, sire. This living fossil and I were planning on playing some pickleball before we found you. How about some 2-on-1?"

Bowser nodded, turning tail and walking back to his side of the net. He slapped his tail on the ground, sending the racket flying and back into his claw. "Prepare to be pulverized, you pruny, pitiful punks."

Kammy clapped her hand on Kamek, smiling gratefully at him on her way to take her own position and materialize a purple racket. "We're not going easy on you just because you have feelings, Bowser."

Raising an eyebrow, Bowser pointed a threatening claw at them both. "Hey. Hey. We are never mentioning that again, or I'll make the two of you into a leather love-seat."

Kamek shrugged innocently, juggling his own magicked racket between his hands. "Then I guess you'll have to win, won't you?"

xxxx0o0o0o0o0o0o0xxxx

Peach was skipping down the halls of Hotel Ca' Shygredo, curtseying to one particularly confused shy-guy pushing a housekeeping cart. She was singing as she went, flitting from doorframe to doorframe until she finally reached her own, throwing the door open. Her smile stretched impossibly wider when she noticed Daisy under her sheets. "Daisy!" Peach rang, spinning and turning her skirt into a perfect circle before shutting the door. "Dasiy!" she repeated, taking a flying leap and landing on her sleeping cousin.

Daisy opened her eyes wide enough to glare at Peach, rolling under her cousins weight to look at the alarm clock. "Peach. What in Underwhere are you doing _on top of me_ at _two am_?" she seethed, pushing Peach off. Daisy sat up groggily, smacking her mouth full of sleep.

"It's so _beautiful_ outside, Daisy. The lanterns are so _bright_! And the boats are so _pretty!_ And the stars...oh, Daisy, the stars are so pure! Twinkling up in the blue-black sky, winking like they have secret wishes they're just _dying _to answer. The people here are so wonderful, too! There aren't very many out there right now, and most of the people are either really scary or really in love and oh, Daisy, isn't love _amazing?_ You have all these...all these feelings that fill up your entire body, and you know that your whole life is special because of that one person. And the very best part is you know, burning deep underneath those feelings, that the person making you feel like that has the same feelings. For you! You know that this crazy, starry, spectacular life-enveloping emotion is enveloping that person you love, too!"

"It's two am."

"Isn't two am wonderful?"

"Not really, Peach, no," Daisy groaned. She rolled over, wrapping the pillow around her ears. "And if you woke me up to prattle on about lanterns and stars and love, you can go...wait." She let go of the pillow, letting it flop back into place, and rolled back to look closer at Peach. "You're happy again. And talking about love."

Peach sat on Daisy's bed, legs crossed under her dress and she nodded eagerly. Her eyes were sparkling as she clutched at the sapphire over her heart. "It's the most wonderful thing in the world. I don't know why I ever wanted to talk about anything else."

Daisy sat up, rubbing her eyes before narrowing them at Peach. "So you...did you...do you have something to tell me?"

She giggled, nodding again. "I'm in love, Daisy. I've _been_ in love, but now I'm _really_ in love. And he loves me back. The most wonderful, funny, loving person in the world loves _me_ and I love _him_. I love Bowser!"

Daisy's eyes popped open and her grin spread across her face as she laughed, pouncing on Peach in a hug. Peach hugged back, laughing and squeezing, smiling and crying.

"I knew it!" Daisy laughed into Peach's hair, squeezing her tightly. "I knew you loved him. I knew it! I'm so glad you figured it out!"

"I had some help," Peach admitted when they separated, wiping her eyes. "From a _lot_ of people. But I am, Daisy. I am so in love and all I want to do is tell everyone, especially Bowser. He...oh my word, he doesn't know! He HAS to know! I have to tell him!"

She leapt of the bed, pacing in front of it, then spinning to face Daisy. "When I tell him, he's going to be so happy. He'll hug me, and we'll kiss, and we'll kiss again, and he'll love me forever and ever and we'll get married and I'll be Queen and he'll be King, and I don't know what we'll do with our countries, but it won't matter, because I love him! And he loves me! And everyone in the world will see how much we love each other, and they'll love each other, too, and there will be world peace, and-"

"Woah, sweetie," Daisy interrupted, chuckling. "I think you're getting ahead of yourself."

"I'm sorry, Dayz. It's just...when you know that you want to spend forever with someone...you want forever to start _right away_, you know?"

She smiled knowingly, nodding. "You should still take this step by step. I suggest telling your father, and your _lov-ah,_ and Mario before jumping right into the world peace thing."

"My lover," Peach repeated, hugging herself and spinning in a fit of giggles. "I don't know how you don't feel like this _every second of every day,_ Daisy! I didn't even kiss him this time, I just..._know_!"

"Sometimes I feel like that, but you get used to it."

"I hope I never get used to it," Peach whispered, flopping onto Daisy's bed. "I hope fifty years from now, when Bowser's hands are all wrinkly and old, he holds mine and rubs my wedding ring and kisses my cheek and I feel just as ready to explode as I do right now." She rolled onto her back, eyes sparkling up at Daisy. "I hope people write epic songs and stories and plays about our love that never dies. Because this feeling? I've _never_ felt like this before, in my whole life. And he's felt like this for so _long_. I'm going to make up for it somehow. First, I have to tell him. I miss him so much, Daisy."

Daisy leaned over, rubbing Peach's shoulder. "I know. But Peach...how are you going to tell him?"

"I'll go over to the Darklands, of course! And I'll-"

"You don't even know where they are," she reminded her cousin calmly.

Peach opened and closed her mouth like a cheep-cheep, pouting. "I guess I'll have to wait for him to kidnap me, then."

"Never thought I'd hear that one," Daisy laughed. "Royalty can get in contact with other royalty, can't we? So maybe you won't have to wait that long. Maybe we just have to get home to the castle and figure it out from there."

"I don't want to wait _that_ long, either," Peach whined, tugging on her hair.

"Well...maybe you're bugged?" Daisy hovered over Peach, looking for a hint of electronics. "Hey, Bowser!" she said, speaking to Peach's chest. "Hey, ya doofus! Peach wants you real bad!"

Peach laughed, shaking her head. "I'm not bugged, Daisy. If I was, he would have picked me up the second you mentioned this was even a possibility."

"Well, that's amusingly inconvenient." Daisy sat back, nesting into her pillows. "What are you gonna do, Peach?"

"I don't know," she groaned. "Just wait, I guess. He chose a horrible time to be patient. Patience is boring. I'd rather be kissing him."

Daisy barked a laugh, shaking her head. "Go to sleep, Princess. You can kiss him all you want in your dreams."

xxxx0o0o0o0o0o0o0xxxx

"Look, _I'm_ in charge, and _I_ say we're doing it!" Wendy's nails were drumming along her crossed arms, her glare steeling all the other koopalings in place.

"And I'm not a stupid girly idiot girl and say we're not!" Morton bellowed, glaring back with almost as much anger.

"Yeah, Wendy, you can't make all of us do it," Roy snarled, hands on his hips. "Dere's seven guys here. Ain't not one of us want to get our hair did but you! And you don't count for nothin'!"

Eyes wide, Lemmy waved his claw in the air. "That's not true," he hollered. "I want my mohawk to look cool!"

"...yeah," Iggy agreed, sheepishly, nodding at his nearly identical brother. "I have a few ideas for my hair as well."

Triumphantly, Wendy squealed and hugged them both. "See!" She snapped towards the other brothers, "You're, like, totally preventing the forward movement of gender-equality in our siblings. Hair isn't, like, just a girl thing!"

"Well, yeah," Larry agreed, eyebrow raised. "You're a girl and you don't even _have_ hair."

That did it for Wendy. Screaming shrilly, she flew at Larry and starting thrashing her claws at his hair. The other koopalings began to shout and yell, Ludwig and Lemmy desperately trying to separate the fight while Morton and Roy cheered them on.

"You guuuuuuys!" Bowser junior wailed, tugging Roy's arm and yelling for attention. "You guuuuuys, we can't fight! We gotta save Mama Peach!"

"Priorities, little dude!" Roy laughed back, pushing Junior off his arm. "There is a bonafide catfight going on. It'd sure be hotter if Larry was a chick and Wendy wasn't our stupid sister, but eh, you gotta take what you kin get, ya know?"

"But Mama Peach...!" Junior wailed again, this time tugging on Morton's arm.

"Jun-hnng-Junior," Ludwig grunted, his hand covering Wendy's face and avoiding her teeth as he kept fighting to pull her back. "I can most assuredly promise you that Princess Peach is not going to disappear from Grand Canal any time in the immediate future. Calm yourself!"

"Yeah, loser-face," Morton replied, laughing and clapping. "Get your loser-face out of my business if you're not gonna bet on nothin, Smelly-foot loser-face!"

With a harumph, Junior let go of his brothers and glared at the fight before him. "Fine, be like that!" He shouted. When there came no reply, he added, more frustrated than before, "We'll see who Mama Peach loves the most when I save her all by myself. Again!" He stormed out of the room and away from the din of the fight, breaking into a run as he formulated a plan.

Going alone was not his plan, but surely the clowncopters weren't _that_ difficult to fly. He tore down the hallways, slipping through the railings of an atrium bridge and freefalling three stories. He landed with a thunk on his shell, flipping back to his feet and racing towards the hangars.

Rounding another corner, Junior still had yet to run into anyone important. He'd passed a few maids and a few hammering repairman, but no one who would think twice why he was alone and at a full run. Then, he heard a scream from up ahead. Shocked at the noise, he started to stumble on his feet. He flailed his arms and shrieked until finally, he fell with his nose smacking straight into the the stone.

Junior groaned and opened his eyes, the screamer standing right in front of his nose, tiny hairy arms covering his blue face. When at least he saw the threat had stopped running, the little blue spider wiped his face. "Ah, tank goodness ya fell!" he laughed, tapping Junior on the nose. "Wail, not tank goodness for ya, I s'pose, but tank goodness for me! Ya woulda crushed me! Splat!" He laughed, exposing his mouth full of gold teeth and empty sockets. "Whatchu doin' runnin' round here anyway fo?"

Junior glared at the spider, pushing himself off the ground and into a sitting position. "I don't wanna tell you."

The spider pouted, scurrying closer to the koopa prince. "Aw, why not, yer 'ighness? I didn't mean teh scare ya. I jus' didn' wanna die, yanno?

"I wasn't scared!" Junior yelled, crossing his arms defensively. "I was only surprised. You just surprised me. I could have crushed you if I wanted!"

"Yeah, but is a good thing ya didn't!" The spider said, eyes wide. "The missus woulda been reeeeeal mad! And shoo, you don' wanna be married to a mad woman who don birthed you seven-hundred childjuns, 'ighness. I kin tell you that much. But anyway! Where you's a-runnin' to?"

"It's a...secret."

"Aw, you kin tell me," the spider promised, crawling up Junior's foot to perch on his toe. "Ah'm mighty fine at keepin' secrets, highness. Do it all ze time fer yer dad, or yer Peach, or whoevah!"

Junior bit his lip, thinking it over. "Well...I _suppose _I should tell someone. It's a super genius plan and nobody even knows to tell me how super genius it is!"

"Ah kin tell you how super jeenyus it is!" the spider cheered, leaning up with a shining grin.

"Okay," Junior quickly decided, scooping the spider up and putting him close to his face. "I'm going to steal a clowncopter and fly to Grand Canal, then I'm gonna rescue Mama Peach!"

After a few seconds, the spider furrowed his brow. "Zat it? Zat's your super jeenyus plan?"

Junior frowned. It WAS a super genius plan! "Well...yeah! Why, you think you got a better idea, Mister?"

"Whatchu gonna do about all ze gaurds in ze hangar, 'ighness?"

"Beat 'em up, obviously," Junior guffawed.

"But then you got just a few minutes to fly 'afore 'is majesty finds out, right? We had teh amp up secur'ty after all y'all rescued her last week the first time. And they track those things, yanno? Das my job, actually, to put in the gee-pee-ess in all the clowncopter things. Takes forever to set up or turn off, and by ze time you do dat, zey gon' be on your tail already! Is not gonna work, 'ighness."

"You're mean," Junior snarled, trying to think of a way around his plan. "Don't you think someone should rescue Mama Peach?"

"Shoo, of course ah do!" the spider said back, grabbing Junior's nose and staring him straight in the eye. "S'why I wantcho plan to _work_, 'ighness! What you gotta do is get to yo Mama Peach wifout being caught leaving the palace. Do it some way they ain't gonna check nothin'."

"That's impossible," Junior countered. "There's no way."

The spider let go, tapping his own chin thoughtfully. At last, his eyes lit up. "Is not _impossible_, 'ighness. Zere's a way. You ain't claw-stro-phobic, right?"

Junior blankly blinked back in response.

"Scared of itty-bitty spaces," the spider clarified, looking around to make sure no one could hear them.

"I'm not scared of anything at all!" Junior shouted back with pride.

The spider broke into another grin, looking fiendish. "Zen I got a plan fer you."

xxxx0o0o0o0o0o0o0xxxx

After being forced to sleep in, Peach was finally awake and pacing her bedroom. "I don't know if I can do this, Daisy," she muttered, taking tiny bites of her brunch croissant with every step. "I know I need to, I know I want to...I just don't know if I can!"

"Don't be ridiculous, Peach," Daisy said from lying flat on her bed, the video game in hand making all sorts of tinny noises in the background. "You're awesome. You can do anything. This is nothing!"

"It's not nothing," Peach replied, continuing wearing her path into the carpet. "What if I break his heart? What if I ruin Mario for ever and he never trusts women again?"

"That's not gonna happen. He's Mario, one big elastic ball. How long does it take for him to get over anything? The second he sees something shiny that needs saving or smells pasta or whatever and he'll forget all about how you destroyed the romantic life he's been building since he was in diapers."

Peach paled. "Oh, heavens, you're right! I can't do that to him!"

"Dude, it was a joke!" Daisy said, not even looking up from her game. "Calm down, princess. He'll be _fine_. And neither of you are gonna be happy if you spend your life trying to make it work when you love someone else. Especially when that someone else is your doting husband's arch-nemesis."

"Mario's not my husband," Peach snapped back, chewing nervously on her croissant again.

"He will be if you don't break the news to him pronto. Neither of you are getting any younger, Peach."

Sighing, Peach flopped down next to Daisy on the bed. "You're right. I just hate disappointing people. That's not who I was raised to be."

"You weren't raised to fall in love with Bowser either, and look where that got you." Daisy finally paused her game, rolling to look at Peach. "Just get it over with. Enjoy the rest of the time you're here, and let him do the same. I can promise you that he won't be heartbroken for long, if at all. He's your friend, and he's gonna want what's best for you. That's all there is to it."

Finally, Peach nodded and sat up. "I'll tell him over gelato. Nothing can ruin gelato for Mario." She got up and went to her phone, dialing Mario's number while Daisy held her hand. After a quick conversation, she hung up, chuckling a little. "He's already there."

"What?"

Peach shrugged, still laughing. "He wanted gelato before lunch, apparently. He's at the place three streets over." She stood up and gathered her things, hugging Daisy. "Wish me luck."

"You don't need it, but okay," Daisy replied, squeezing her cousin tight. "Good luck."

The walk down those three streets felt like miles to Peach, cheery flags and laughing passerbies taunting her the entire way. At long last, she found herself in front of the gelato place, its tricolor awning waving mockingly. She took a deep breath and pressed in, the tinkling of the bells and her high-heels alerting Mario to attention.

He was seated at a table in the middle, Luigi right there with him and their three empty bowls. "Princess Peach!" Mario cheered, waving her over. "Good-a morning at last!"

"Hi, Mario," Peach said, smiling as sincerely as she could. "Hi, Luigi. Daisy made me sleep in, since I was up late last night...thinking."

"That's-a what I heard," Luigi replied, nodding. "Daisy said-a you woke her up at two am!"

Peach laughed drily, pulling up a chair. A shy guy quickly rushed over to take her order (just a small hazlenut gelato, and another bowl of orange for Mario) before leaving them alone again. "Luigi, can I...um, can I talk to Mario alone?"

Confused, Mario looked from Peach to Luigi and back again, but didn't say anything. Luigi raised his eyebrows, fiddling with his mustache before nodding. "Si, that is-a fine. Mario, I will-a just get a head start, okay? See you in a bit." He put money down on the table and nearly ran out of the restaurant, leaving Peach and Mario alone with their gelatos.

They ate in silence for a little bit, Peach unaware how to start and Mario having nothing to say. Finally, Peach looked up from her gelato and stared hard at the man across the table. "Mario, are we a couple?" she asked.

Mario looked back blinking in surprise. Slowly, he said "Si...? We are, aren't we?"

Peach wrung her hands, looking away. "Are we? Do you call me your girlfriend? Or am I just the princess that you save all the time? Daisy and Luigi are _obviously_ a couple, but are we?"

"Not every couple can-a be like Daisy and-a Luigi," Mario countered, pointing his spoon at Peach before taking two more bites. "They are...they are like-a my parents. Two peas in a pod."

"Don't you want that?" Peach asked honestly. "Don't you want to be so in love, like Luigi and Daisy, or like your parents, or like...so many other couples? Don't you think that's what life and relationships should be about...love?"

Mario shrugged, chewing thoughtfully. "I guess-a so. It seems nice. But I'm-a okay if we don't."

Peach swallowed hard. This is exactly what Daisy was talking about. Mario was so set in his life, so _okay_ with it that if she didn't do something, their present would just become their future. "I'm not, Mario. I'm not in love with you. And honestly, I don't think you're in love with me. And I don't think we should be dating."

Mario's spoon was in his mouth, his frown forming around it. He swallowed, looking around the restaurant. "Are you-a sure, Peach?"

She nodded. "I'm sure. I'm...I'm in _love, _Mario. And I want to take advantage of that, because he loves me back. I don't want to string you along for the rest of your life while I spend mine wishing you were someone else."

"So...we are not a couple then?"

Peach couldn't help but smile a little bit at Mario's simple concerns. "Yeah. We're not. If we were, which...I'm not too sure about, honestly...I think this is our official breakup."

Mario sighed, wiping a bit of gelato off of his mustache. "Okay," he finally said, eating more gelato.

"Okay? Just...just okay?"

"We are-a still friends, so it's okay. And I can-a still rescue you without the kisses, si?"

Peach laughed. "Of course. But honestly, I don't know how much rescuing you'll have to do, Mario."

Mario's spoon clattered in his bowl. "But-a...why not?"

Blushing furiously, Peach started to play with her own gelato. "Because...remember when I said I was in love and he loved me back?"

"Is-a _he_ going to rescue you now?" Mario asked, jealously clear in his voice.

"No," Peach laughed. She swallowed hard, looking deep into Mario's eyes. "It's Bowser," she whispered.

"It's-a what?"

"Mario, shh! Keep your voice down! I promise I'm not brain-washed, or going crazy, or under a spell or any of that. I just...last week, I was with him and I..."

"How long have you been in love with-a _Bowser_?" Mario asked back, gripping his spoon defensively.

"I don't know, but not more than a week," Peach promised, looking around the restaurant nervously. As much as she wanted to shout about her love from the rooftops, if anyone found out it would spread like wildfire. And she wanted to tell Bowser...not to mention her father...herself. "I'm not crazy, I swear."

"Mama mia," Mario groaned, leaning into his chair. "So all these years, I have-a been rescuing you from...from your secret lover?"

"What? No!" Peach balked. "I hardly even liked him before last week. It wasn't like that at all!"

Narrowing his eyes at Peach, Mario took a few more bites of gelato. "But you are sure that you-a _love _him now?"

"I know it seems fast to you, but it seems like I've been falling in love with him forever to me. I'm positive, Mario. And it's not like I'm going to accept his hand in marriage or anything...I want to see where things go. See if this is real, if we can make it work. I really do love him, and I care about you, too. So I wanted you to know." She watched him cautiously, but he wasn't saying anything as he filled his mouth with more orange gelato. "And I'd really appreciate it if you supported us, too."

"So no more rescuing you from Bowser?"

"No, I think I'll be perfectly content to stay with him," Peach replied with a laugh. She quickly caught on to his disappointment. It seemed like losing his rescue missions hurt Mario more than losing his almost-girlfriend. "Hey, Mario," she said, gripping his hand with hers. "There will be other princesses that need saving. Stars won't stop going missing just because Bowser might not be the one stealing them. You'll still be the hero of the Mushroom Kingdom, you know!"

Mario sighed, taking a rather large bite. "I know. I saved the world last week, and you were-a not involved."

"Exactly." They were quiet for a bit, Peach releasing Mario's hand and taking a few more bites of her own gelato. "So...you're sure you're okay with this? You're not mad, or ruined for other women, or any of that?"

"No way," Mario chuckled, continuing to scrape the near bottom of his bowl. "I am-a happy for you. Love will be nice. And maybe Bowser won't-a let you get kidnapped in the first place."

Peach smiled at that. No, he certainly wouldn't. "So do you...want to hear how it happened or anything?"

Mario took his last few bites, thinking it over before shaking his head. "I'm-a fine. Besides, Luigi and I are going to take a tour of-a the plumbing in Grand Canal. It's a water city, you know. So the plumbing is-a _crazy_!"

Peach laughed lightly, smiling to herself. _He'd be just fine._ "Alright, Mario. And hey- if you figure out a way to get to the Darklands, I've got a conversation to have with Bowser. I have to break the news to him, too."

"That Grand Canal is-a good for plumbing?"

"No! That I love him!"

"He doesn't know?" Mario asked, apparently interested again.

"I don't think so," Peach replied, smiling as she imagined telling him.

"Mama Mia, Peach." Mario shook his head, sorting through the bills in his wallet. "Good luck," he said, putting the money on the table and getting up to find Luigi. With a wink, he said, "So long, Queen Bowser," and left.

Peach just grinned into her gelato.

xxxx0o0o0o0o0o0o0xxxx

Walking back into the hotel, Peach was in high spirits. Mario was okay with her and Bowser, _she_ was very much okay with her and Bowser, and after talking to a few more people, she could begin their lives together at last. She headed towards the golden elevators, mind on cloud nine, when a shrill voice broke into her thoughts.

"Princess Peach!" a shy guy behind the main desk called, waving her over. "Princess Peach, I 'ave something for you!"

Curiously, she walked over. "Something for _me_? But it's...has the mail already come?"

"Two zings, actually," the shy guy muttered, turning around and rummaging through a bunch of cubbies. "Zis is for ju," he said, presenting her with a lovely bouquet. Peach squealed in delight, pressing her nose into the gorgeous flowers. They were from her dad and Toadsworth, a note attached. She opened it to read it when the shy guy's grunts caught her attention. "Ah-and zis," he wheezed, tugging on something below her line of vision and behind the desk, "Is also for ju.

He grunted and after awhile reappeared, wobbling around with an enormous box. The box thunked down on the table, leaving the shy guy doubled over and gasping for breath. The box was thick cardboard, "Fragile", "Extreme Rush Delivery", "Do Not Bend", "Valuable Contents", "Do Not Crush", "High Priority", and "Caution" covering nearly every inch of its giant size. Curiously, Peach wrapped her arms around the box and chirped in surprise at its weight. The shy guy was not exaggerating! She bent her knees, whirling the box around and wobbling as it took her farther into the middle of the lobby.

A few tourists raised their eyebrows at her, giving Peach and the mysterious box a wide berth. Whatever was in this box was too heavy to carry all the way to the elevators. Peach caught her breath, bending over the box and ripping through the thick layers of tape.

Suddenly, the contents of the box seemed to jump inside it, throwing the flaps wide open and inhaling loudly. Peach shrieked at the sight before her- Bowser Junior, airmailed and gasping for breath. "Junior! What are you..._Junior!_"

"Mama...Peach!" he managed between loud breaths.

Peach was acutely aware of all the eyes still on them, hastily closing the box again, much to the displeasure of Junior inside. "Shhh, stay in there!" she hissed, fighting against his claws on the box's inside. She sat on the box's top, smiling widely at everyone who passed. Apparently, opening the box in the lobby was a terrible idea.

Hardly a minute passed before Junior stopped fighting, content to tear another tiny hole in the top. A busboy shyguy walked over, looking at Peach with confusion. "Could you help u- me?" Peach asked sweetly. "I need to carry this package to my room, but I'm afraid it's much too heavy for me." She stood up, praying that Junior wouldn't break the lid off and thrilled when her hopes came true.

The busguy bent over to try lifting the box, failing almost instantly. "If you'll excuse me," he purred, rushing away for additional assistance. When he came back, three other busguys trailing behind him, Peach positioned herself on the box.

"Don't you dare move," she whispered, hoping Junior could hear. The busguys chattered in Italian, situating themselves and counting to _tre_. With all the combined help, the box was soon lifted and slowly marched to the elevator. "I'll open it," Peach promised, running ahead.

The elevator opened just in time for the busguys to bustle in with the box, setting it down and grunting. They rode in silence, Peach eyeing the box the entire time. "Mama mia, Miss," one of them mumbled, fanning his face. "What is in this box?"

Peach shrugged, avoiding their questioning eyes.

Eventually, the elevator reached the seventh floor, so Peach directed the shyguys to her room. Daisy looked up from her game, eyebrows raised. "Geez, what's that, Peach?" she asked, throwing the game aside to peer curiously.

Peach waved away Daisy's question, tipping and thanking the shyguys. Once they left, she knelt down in front of the box. "Daisy, just so you know, I was _just_ as surprised as you." She opened it, getting a full face of Bowser Junior. She was expecting the worst and received it as Daisy shrieked in terror.

"What's he doing here?" she wailed, backing up to the bed.

Junior glared at Daisy, hugging Peach possessively and whining, "Mama, what's she doing here?"

"Junior, I'm on vacation with Daisy. I want to know why _you're _here!"

Squeezing tighter, he replied, "Rescuing you, duh!"

Daisy managed to calm down, still several feet away from the miniature Bowser. "See, Peach. It didn't take that long for you to get kidnapped."

Peach furrowed her brow, pulling away to look at Junior. "No, but I really believe Bowser wouldn't try and kidnap me right now. Junior, does your Papa know you're here?"

He shook his head, proud. "I'm gonna bring you home as a surprise!"

Looking to Daisy, Peach bit her lip. "You know...that's actually not a bad idea."

"It's not?" Junior asked, in surprise. Even after years of 'rescuing', no one had ever given a pleased reaction.

"It's not!" Daisy agreed, moving closer to them both. "I mean, you can't get there alone, right? And you obviously gotta tell him as soon as possible."

"Tell who what?" Junior piqued.

"Oh, Peach, speaking of that- how did Mario take it?"

"Really well, actually. He didn't even want my explanation afterwards...I guess he realized it wasn't as real as he might have thought. He's mostly upset about the rescuing thing."

"Mario took what where?"

Continuing to ignore Junior, Daisy smiled widely. "I told you he'd be okay. And really, Mario has so many interested parties going after him at any given time, it's not like he's doomed."

"Trust me, I know," Peach chuckled.

"Know what?" Junior shrieked, tired of being talked over.

Daisy knelt down and stuck out her hand. "Bowser Junior, I don't think we've formally met. I'm your..." she looked to Peach, receiving an affirming nod, "Auntie Daisy. I've heard a lot about you."

Junior grinned, grabbing Daisy's hand firmly and shaking it. "Of course you have! I'm awesome!"

Daisy chuckled. "And a lot like your dad, I see."

Humming in agreement, Peach ruffled Junior's mane. "You have no idea." She pressed a light kiss to Junior's head, making the koopaling flush red. "Now, Junior, I certainly hope you've got a real plan to getting us back to the Darklands. Because I need to go there as soon as you can possibly get us. And there's no way I'm being _mailed_ to your dad."

Junior chewed on his lip thoughtfully, wandering around the room. At last, he spun towards the princesses, cheering "Ah-hah! I've got it!" Peach and Daisy leaned forward in interest, and just as Junior opened his mouth to say something, the hotel door handle started to jingle.

Peach shrieked, lunging forward and grabbing the koopaling. She yanked him off the ground and, ignoring his roars of protest, shoved him onto the bed. Daisy quickly covered Junior up with pillows, sat on him, and snarled "Shut up!" while the jingling turned to knocking.

Shaking a bit, Peach adjusted her hair and dress, looking back at her cousin nervously. Daisy looked incredibly suspicious, perched on top of a pile of moving pillows, but...it would have to do for now. She opened the door slowly, peeking her head out and seeing the hotel manager.

"Um...your highness?" He started, a question in his voice. She opened the door a little wider and he thrust out the abandoned bouquet of flowers. "You left this downstairs."

xxxx0o0o0o0o0o0o0xxxx

Toadsworth paced around the conference room, his hands rubbing his cane over and over and over again. "Oh, calm down, would you?" Toadette said, exhasperated, as she continued to fiddle with cords. "We're going to be thousands of miles away from them. No one's going to hurt you."

"You don't know what kind of newfangled technology they might have, poppet. They could travel through wires now; who knows?"

"You're being insane, Toadsworth," Toadette drawled, making her last few connections. "The King wants us to have a better international relationship with the Darklands, and this is the best way to do it without actually endangering anyone, alright? The _best _way. Besides; Peach isn't even home." The screen sizzled to life, making Toadsworth shriek and Toadette roll her eyes. "We haven't even connected yet, sir."

"Maybe I don't want to connect after all. You ever thought o' that, eh?"

"I kind of figured," she grunted back. After connecting a few more cords, the royal Toad logo appeared on the screen. Toadette grinned and skipped in front of it, wielding her remote like a sword. She followed the on-screen directions, typed in a bunch of codes, and ignored Toadsworth's nervous mumblings as the video tried to connect.

Thousands of miles away, the koopa on security in the media room nearly fell off of his chair. Lights on the dusty video conference modem were flashing in a pattern he'd never seen before...not that the modem lit up much at all. Frantically, he fished for his book of proper procedure and hunted for right page. "Uh...Kamek?" he croaked, finger shaking as it touched 'Video Conference from Mushroom Kingdom desired' and the handwritten '_ACCEPT IMMEDIATELY'_. He slammed his hand down on a button to buzz in Kamek, stuttering, "There's a si-situation with the video conference requests..."

Kamek magically appeared next to the kopa, startling him right out of his chair. As if that was his intention all along, Kamek took the vacant seat and watched the pattern of lights. "Well, I'll be darned," he said quietly to himself, disappearing again and leaving the poor koopa even more at a loss. He had just begun to calm down when Kamek magicked his way into the room yet again, this time flanked with Kammy and Bowser.

"This better be freaking good," Bowser growled, hands on his hips.

"Sire, the Mushroom Kingdom..." Kamek began, walking over to the modem and pointing at the lights. "They want to video conference."

The blood drained out of Bowser's face as he fumbled around the room. "But why? Does that mean Peach is home? She was supposed to be in Grand Canal for a whole week! They wouldn't want to talk to me unless it was about Peach...does she miss me? Is she calling to say she _hates_ me? What do they want?"

"We won't know until you accept the call, sire," Kammy said patiently. She walked over to the modem, a wrinkled finger stretching out before Bowser tackled her to the floor.

"I'm not ready!" He whined, letting Kamek pull him off of the old magikoopa with grunts that he'd break her bones. "I'm not ready!"

"Your'e not ready for what, your awesomeness?" Kamek asked, helping Kammy off the floor and straightening her robes. "To talk to the girl you love? To see her family out of their own request?" Bowser was silent. "Let's just accept the conference and see what they want, okay?"

"Wait! My...uh...my kids!" Bowser said, his hand covering the flashing lights completely. "They'll want to see this."

Kammy sighed dramatically, pulling out her wand. "_Fine_, your _gentleness_. I'll go get them for you." Kammy popped away, leaving Kamek, Bowser, and the groaning koopa alone and silent. Bowser lifted up his claw, staring down at the lights while his heart pumped in time with the flashes. What _did_ they want?

At long last, Kammy appeared again, seven koopalings chained together behind her. "We have a situation," she said gravely. "Junior's missing."

xxxx0o0o0o0o0o0o0xxxx

"And that concludes our tour!" the shyguy chirped, earning himself a smattering of applause before the crowd of plumbers dissipated. The tour through Grand Canal, leading them through the pipe system underneath the canal itself, was incredibly illuminating, and Luigi left with a notebook full of ideas. Mario, however, looked a little distracted.

"What's-a wrong, Mario?" Luigi asked, frowning and putting away his notebook.

They zoomed out of a pipe, Mario shrugging once their feet hit dry ground. "I'm-a just thinking. About...about a lot of-a things."

"Such as?"

Mario sighed. He didn't normally give in to such prodding, but he really did need to talk to someone. "It's-a Peach. She...she is-a not my girlfriend."

Luigi looked back at Mario, eyebrows raised in surprise. "Since when?"

"Since today..." Mario replied, walking with Luigi back towards downtown. "She is-a in love with someone else. And so, is a good thing we are not-a together, but...it's weird, you know?"

Luigi nodded in understanding, walking in mostly silence. "Are you okay?"

"Si," Mario sighed. "We are-a friends, and I think she is a little-a bit crazy, but...this whole world is-a crazy, you know?"

"Crazy for leaving you?"

"No, not-a that. Crazy for being in love with-a Bowser. It's-a _King Bowser_, you know? Mama mia..."

Luigi nodded, chuckling as he agreed, "Si, that _is_-a pretty crazy."

Mario stopped dead in his tracks, staring at Luigi. "Wait a minute...did I tell you this before?"

Luigi turned around slowly, answering "No..." before his eyes widened. "Oh! Oh! I meant-a to say 'King _Bowser?_ Why is-a she in-a love with King Bowser? Ohhh, no!" Luigi pulled at his mustache, looking at Mario nervously. His brother just narrowed his eyes right back.

"You already-a knew, didn't you?"

Luigi stared at Mario before finally releasing his mustache and sighing. "_Si_, I already knew...I'm-a sorry, I was supposed to be surprised for you."

"Daisy told you?"

Nodding, Luigi chuckled, "Daisy told me."

Mario caught up with his brother, sighing. "You are-a better at-a keeping secrets than I thought," he said, amused.

"Oh, Mario, you have-a no idea." Luigi scratched the back of his neck, thinking back on the elaborate plan that Daisy had concocted to keep Mario happy. It made him wonder...with Peach permanently out of danger from Bowser, would Mario be okay? "How are-a you handling it, Mario?"

"It's...weird." Mario admitted. "But I think I am-a okay. Peach and I...we were not in-a love, like you and Daisy. We just...dated out of-a convenience, you know?" Mario made a face, continuing, "I'm not even-a sure we dated at _all_. It was...assumed, I think."

"But what about with-a her picking _Bowser? _Are you okay with-a that?"

"She's not stupid," Mario said, "so I have to kind of-a trust her. And you know, when-a Bowser wasn't busy kidnapping Peach or trying to take over the kingdom, he was kind of-a fun to play sports with. Very competitive. And bad at-a go-karts."

Luigi chuckled and nodded. "Competitive" was an understatement. "Is a good point, Mario. And with-a Peach, he might even be less of a tyrant, maybe."

"She's-a Princess Peach, not a miracle worker," Mario laughed. "But Bowser always-a treated her good. So...it might-a be okay."

"Like you said, she's-a not stupid," Luigi agreed. They kept walking in silence, Luigi mulling over everything. Mario was taking it shockingly well, considering Peach had been his girl for years and years. His only other real girlfriend was back in Brooklyn, before their lives turned upside down. "So, you're-a sure you're not heartbroken?"

"Just disappointed," Mario admitted. "Bowser set up-a really good obstacle courses."

Luigi laughed, shaking his head. "I bet he would-a be willing to set-a them up for fun." Mario brightened considerably, nodding at that. It wouldn't be the first time he risked his life for just a few coins, or whatever. "And hey, plenty of-a other fish in the sea when it-a comes to love, si?"

Mario chuckled, pulling out his cellphone and scrolling through the pages of names. He nodded, even as his finger stilled, Meredith's name highlighted. "Si...plenty of-a other fish."

* * *

**Author's Note:** I hope I didn't become terrible in writing since chapter 50, I hope you guys still liked that! As I said, this was the penultimate chapter, so the next one is the LAST CHAPTER! WOO! It'll probably be longer than average, because I have lots to get in. Unfortunately, I won't be able to wrap everything up quite as neatly as I'd like, but I'll definitely try. No promises as to when it's coming out, because I want it up quick but I also want it to be PERFECT. And I'm moving to Disney World in 28 days, so...that'll be...busy! But anyway, just to reassure you all- I love you guys SO SO SO MUCH, I love my otp SO SO SO MUCH, and I'd never abandon you for real. This story is going to be finished, and YOU'RE GONNA LIKE IT. hopefully ;)


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